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Clovenhoof #7
Hooflandia
When Jeremy Clovenhoof decides to set himself up as President for Life of his own breakaway country, he knows he'll need money, lots and lots of money. That might be a bit difficult, particularly since the Inland Revenue have just presented him with an enormous tax bill and Heaven and Hell have sent Joan of Arc and Rutspud of the Sixth Circle to bring him under control. But nothing can keep this devil down. He's got the business acumen and the spunk to make a fortune and found the independent nation state of Hooflandia. Come see the really big wall! Enjoy the nudist beach! Visit the combined log flume and waterboarding torture centre! The seventh book in the Clovenhoof series, Hooflandia, is a ridiculous romp, featuring ventriloquist dummies, cut-price funerals, sexy archbishops, robot cars, musical butt plugs, tax avoidance and a million angry nuns.
634 pages, Paperback
First published June 8, 2018
112 people are currently reading
104 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews
December 22, 2021
Book seven in the Clovenhoof series in which Satan has been kicked out of hell and is living his best life in Sutton Coldfield, UK.
This one was just alright for me, there were parts that made me laugh but honestly I think I wasn't quite in the mood for it's humour.
I did love The Game though, I would love to play that game, sounded like the best fun with the most upside down rules ever.
At time of posting this series is available on Kindle Unlimited.
This one was just alright for me, there were parts that made me laugh but honestly I think I wasn't quite in the mood for it's humour.
I did love The Game though, I would love to play that game, sounded like the best fun with the most upside down rules ever.
At time of posting this series is available on Kindle Unlimited.
April 23, 2023
Did I love this book? Yes, yes I did. Did I laugh at this book? Yes, aloud, many times. Do I recommend this book to no GR friends... probably not. This is the 7th book in a complicated, crazy series that requires reading some of the preceding books. If you read this book stand alone it would be like only watching the parade scene in Animal House and trying to interpret the movie from there.
The authors give us Jeremy (aka Satan), Nerys & Ben, John Of Arc, Rutspud, many Saints and Angels, a Praypal (Yes not a typo) App that is overflowing heaven with undesirables, mountains of pop culture references from Cecil the Lion to Ghostbusters, and demons.
Do I recommend the series? Sure if you aren't easily offended and don't take any of your spiritual or ethical beliefs too seriously.
Edited to add this book is insane like taking Ayahuasca on a tilt a whirl insane.
The authors give us Jeremy (aka Satan), Nerys & Ben, John Of Arc, Rutspud, many Saints and Angels, a Praypal (Yes not a typo) App that is overflowing heaven with undesirables, mountains of pop culture references from Cecil the Lion to Ghostbusters, and demons.
Do I recommend the series? Sure if you aren't easily offended and don't take any of your spiritual or ethical beliefs too seriously.
Edited to add this book is insane like taking Ayahuasca on a tilt a whirl insane.
January 17, 2021
This is a laugh out loud riot. Really enjoyed this one. It was so outlandish (even for Clovenhoof!) but I loved every minute. I really enjoy the paring up of Joan & Rutspud especially.
These books are written in such a way that the words just flow so easily. And the dialogue is so easy to imagine in my head if that makes sense.
These books are written in such a way that the words just flow so easily. And the dialogue is so easy to imagine in my head if that makes sense.
April 11, 2019
Jeremy Clovenhoof does it again! Creating Hooflandia, his version of paradise, he nearly brings about the end of the world! What a twit!
That ending, though . . .
That ending, though . . .
January 22, 2024
Entertaining and light-hearted as ever.
The fourth wall joke about divine intervention being needed to solve the issue did amuse me but I didn't completely enjoy the ending.
Didn't enjoy the "to be continued" but I'm sure it'll be explained in the next book.
Joan and Rutspud are a great pair and I enjoyed their story.
It bothered me that you need to read "trump of doom" to get the context as to why Michael isn't present, i was very confused by this.
I enjoyed the last book in the series better but it was still a clovenhoof book so very enjoyable
The fourth wall joke about divine intervention being needed to solve the issue did amuse me but I didn't completely enjoy the ending.
Didn't enjoy the "to be continued" but I'm sure it'll be explained in the next book.
Joan and Rutspud are a great pair and I enjoyed their story.
It bothered me that you need to read "trump of doom" to get the context as to why Michael isn't present, i was very confused by this.
I enjoyed the last book in the series better but it was still a clovenhoof book so very enjoyable
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
July 4, 2018
All I can say is you make me laugh and laughter is healing at the highest levels . These books are real English humor and having lived away from England for over forty years you bring me home . Not a Brummie but a Londoner but the resonance is amazing x keep up the good work guys my favorites along with Tom Sharpe $ Terry Pratchet ( bless his whiskers) Thankyou
January 28, 2022
This is such a bizarre, entertaining and hilarious series. Love this one as much as the previous.
Finished second round. Still love it!
Finished second round. Still love it!
July 31, 2020
I struggled with this one
I've read all the Clovenhoof books and loved them all but this one I felt was a slog at times
It was overly long and quite tedious in places
The positives are I loved Joan and Rutspud they made a great team
Ben was as good and bewildered as ever
But I found the Jeremy and Nerys became very annoying at times especially Nerys would was like a poor parody of her former self this had the effect of losing sympathy with the character I've previously loved
Jeremy wasn't the best either the character was taken to extremes which I felt didn't work, I much preferred the "Beelzebelle" Jeremy
It seemed to me that this book was trying too hard to be funny just throwing things together for effect
It had some good ideas but was disjointed
The end was a disappointment too after all that slog
I'll read the short stories and hope were back on track maybe the idea has run out of steam ? I do hope Not
I've read all the Clovenhoof books and loved them all but this one I felt was a slog at times
It was overly long and quite tedious in places
The positives are I loved Joan and Rutspud they made a great team
Ben was as good and bewildered as ever
But I found the Jeremy and Nerys became very annoying at times especially Nerys would was like a poor parody of her former self this had the effect of losing sympathy with the character I've previously loved
Jeremy wasn't the best either the character was taken to extremes which I felt didn't work, I much preferred the "Beelzebelle" Jeremy
It seemed to me that this book was trying too hard to be funny just throwing things together for effect
It had some good ideas but was disjointed
The end was a disappointment too after all that slog
I'll read the short stories and hope were back on track maybe the idea has run out of steam ? I do hope Not
September 4, 2024
Ever wondered what would happen if Satan retired and took up board games as a hobby?
This one is a bit watered down, I think because it removed Michael from the equation and attempted to push Joan of Arc + Rutspud as the dynamic duo. While I love both individually it just doesn't work.
There are a million subplots. Tax evasion, The luck of the devil, Trump satire.... can't believe an author lowered themselves to actually publishing the word "bigly" and "build a wall". Wonder if they cringe looking back at it now.
A fun nonsensical romp but without Michael it's really missing something.
This one is a bit watered down, I think because it removed Michael from the equation and attempted to push Joan of Arc + Rutspud as the dynamic duo. While I love both individually it just doesn't work.
There are a million subplots. Tax evasion, The luck of the devil, Trump satire.... can't believe an author lowered themselves to actually publishing the word "bigly" and "build a wall". Wonder if they cringe looking back at it now.
A fun nonsensical romp but without Michael it's really missing something.
July 18, 2018
Great Story, what’s up with the editing?
Great story, once again really well written, with an amazing plot. But unlike past books I noticed more than a few glaring typos, even what appear to be miss-used words. I even saw one case where some rogue html had slipped in: &
Regardless, don’t let a few editing faux pas stop you from reading this. I lost sleep reading this story because I couldn’t put it down.
Great story, once again really well written, with an amazing plot. But unlike past books I noticed more than a few glaring typos, even what appear to be miss-used words. I even saw one case where some rogue html had slipped in: &
Regardless, don’t let a few editing faux pas stop you from reading this. I lost sleep reading this story because I couldn’t put it down.
December 18, 2018
Jeremy running a church on no!
We start with a quick recap of our characters and their residence before we learn they are deeply involved in The Game! A foreign game found that usurps Monopoly hands down.
Jeremy is still the lazy devious skin he is, Nerys still uses people to her own benefit and Ben is oblivious as ever!
A great story of our trio and what happens when a bishop goes missing and people use apps to forgive sins. Have a good laugh at what befalls them
We start with a quick recap of our characters and their residence before we learn they are deeply involved in The Game! A foreign game found that usurps Monopoly hands down.
Jeremy is still the lazy devious skin he is, Nerys still uses people to her own benefit and Ben is oblivious as ever!
A great story of our trio and what happens when a bishop goes missing and people use apps to forgive sins. Have a good laugh at what befalls them
June 29, 2018
The usual mix of madness, humor and smut. Loved the nuns with the hand puppets - great addition to the cast. The characters feel like old friends by now. Lots of fun, though could have been cut in places - bit too much repetition which had me skipping pages. Even so, looking forward to the next outing.
November 4, 2018
Crispy pancakes..
Out and out madness with visits to Heaven, Hell and Birmingham. Jeremy, Nerys and Ben are up to their usual trick of creating mayhem.
Why do I like this? Probably because it is so silly and over the top, characters included, but also because I sometimes wish that it was real.
Out and out madness with visits to Heaven, Hell and Birmingham. Jeremy, Nerys and Ben are up to their usual trick of creating mayhem.
Why do I like this? Probably because it is so silly and over the top, characters included, but also because I sometimes wish that it was real.
December 10, 2018
Great musical elements
This book had what was probably the most hilarious thing I've ever read. As with most of their books, it seems like the authors are randomly slapping outlandish events together but everything spirals out of control and all the events always lead to a hugely outlandish outcome. I had to stop reading because I was dying at a certain party scene
This book had what was probably the most hilarious thing I've ever read. As with most of their books, it seems like the authors are randomly slapping outlandish events together but everything spirals out of control and all the events always lead to a hugely outlandish outcome. I had to stop reading because I was dying at a certain party scene
April 5, 2020
A fun read. I just can't understate the hilarity of Satan bumbling around this world without a clue how things work, demons & saints working together to restore balance, a new app that makes it possible for anyone to enter heaven to the point no one is going to hell, and regular people doing regular things thrown together in one cohesive story.
June 14, 2022
So much to like in this one. St Joan D'Arc and the demon Rutspud on an Earth based mission. Complete skewering of mega-churches (and organized religion in general). I could completely relate to the playing of The Game and locking it up while in progress so no one can cheat. Reminded me of Risk games in my youth.
December 30, 2022
Rather lazy ending
I realize the ending is a cliff hanger, but it seems like the authors threw up their hands and gave up for the time being. Also at the beginning they stated Michael is in jail, WHY? Not as good as the previous books.
I realize the ending is a cliff hanger, but it seems like the authors threw up their hands and gave up for the time being. Also at the beginning they stated Michael is in jail, WHY? Not as good as the previous books.
June 9, 2018
<3<3<3
I do love these books - absolutely hilarious and well worth the read. Indeed, I put off my masters thesis for this one
I do love these books - absolutely hilarious and well worth the read. Indeed, I put off my masters thesis for this one
July 13, 2018
Another 5 * book from Heide and Iain. Hilarious, naughty and slapstick, they never let their readers down! Looking forward to the next instalment.
July 16, 2018
Top notch humour. Laugh a page and thoroughly irreverant.
October 4, 2019
Didn't think this one was quite as good as the others, but i still really enjoyed it
January 11, 2020
This whole series is seriously addicting.
Read
January 29, 2021More fun. Loved
February 8, 2022
kinda want hot pockets now
March 2, 2023
Satire of when the devil is banned to earth
April 20, 2023
Fun series!
This Clovenhoof series is really entertaining. It's funny and silly. I love the characters! I'm headed off to Book 7.
This Clovenhoof series is really entertaining. It's funny and silly. I love the characters! I'm headed off to Book 7.
October 18, 2023
This is too funny!
I love the subtle British humour! Ben reminds me of the main character in Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy😅 Bravo Mrs. Goody and Mr. Grant👍🏻
I love the subtle British humour! Ben reminds me of the main character in Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy😅 Bravo Mrs. Goody and Mr. Grant👍🏻
June 18, 2025
One of the very best in the series. I found it unbelievably funny, but not for the PC minded.
November 25, 2021
Urban Fantasy, first published 2018
Four-hundred-and-something Chester Road. Boldmere. Sutton Coldfield. The house was built something like a hundred years ago, back in a time when people were shorter but ceilings were inexplicably higher. Three storeys tall and deeper than it was wide, it had probably been home to the family of a factory manager, a minor civil servant or a small-time professional. They might even have had a maid or a cook. It had been that kind of house. In leaner, post-war times, it was divided into self-contained flats. As the barriers between social classes blurred, the divided house became home to a variety of factory folk, council servants, professionals of varying dubiousness and even a maid or cook or two –all living cheek by jowl. Then, in the early twenty-first century, for some very convoluted reasons, it became the home of a man, a woman, the devil and an angel and there was a period of stability (in the same way that the Cold War was a period of stability). This did not last long.
Das fängt ja schon mal gut an: eine Reihe von gewissenlosen Kapitalisten, Ausbeutern und Tierquälern, die eigentlich in der Hölle landen sollten, sind in den Himmel gelangt. Dort ruinieren sie ziemlich schnell die Agenda von Gewaltlosigkeit, Gleichheit, Brüderlichkeit und führen eine eigene Papiergeldwährung ein (baby Jesus on the five dollarnote) ...
Gelungene Satire. Wie die Reichen im Himmel todunglücklich werden ist genial.
Four-hundred-and-something Chester Road. Boldmere. Sutton Coldfield. The house was built something like a hundred years ago, back in a time when people were shorter but ceilings were inexplicably higher. Three storeys tall and deeper than it was wide, it had probably been home to the family of a factory manager, a minor civil servant or a small-time professional. They might even have had a maid or a cook. It had been that kind of house. In leaner, post-war times, it was divided into self-contained flats. As the barriers between social classes blurred, the divided house became home to a variety of factory folk, council servants, professionals of varying dubiousness and even a maid or cook or two –all living cheek by jowl. Then, in the early twenty-first century, for some very convoluted reasons, it became the home of a man, a woman, the devil and an angel and there was a period of stability (in the same way that the Cold War was a period of stability). This did not last long.
Das fängt ja schon mal gut an: eine Reihe von gewissenlosen Kapitalisten, Ausbeutern und Tierquälern, die eigentlich in der Hölle landen sollten, sind in den Himmel gelangt. Dort ruinieren sie ziemlich schnell die Agenda von Gewaltlosigkeit, Gleichheit, Brüderlichkeit und führen eine eigene Papiergeldwährung ein (baby Jesus on the five dollarnote) ...
Gelungene Satire. Wie die Reichen im Himmel todunglücklich werden ist genial.
September 24, 2023
Another fantastic installment in the Clovenhoof collection. I do enjoy that within the clovenhoof collection we get the chance to re-engage with characters from previous books. It was great to have Rutspud and Joan back in the spotlight again as our heros, doing their best to work out what's going wrong on Earth again mixing things up in heaven and hell. And of course the problems may just have stemed from Jeremy Clovenhoof and pals.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews