What do you think?
Rate this book
I Spy
Someone is watching your every move…
Holly Lawrence always wanted to be a spy, but the experience proved more dangerous than anything she imagined. Now, Holly lives in hiding under an assumed name. She avoids relationships and trusts no one.
But Holly’s new life begins to unravel when she encounters a young mother and her two-year-old child… a child who reminds her of a past she has tried hard to forget. This time, someone is spying on her, and Holly will need to decide how far she is willing to go to survive.
A psychological thriller unlike anything you’ve read before...
Holly Lawrence always wanted to be a spy, but the experience proved more dangerous than anything she imagined. Now, Holly lives in hiding under an assumed name. She avoids relationships and trusts no one.
But Holly’s new life begins to unravel when she encounters a young mother and her two-year-old child… a child who reminds her of a past she has tried hard to forget. This time, someone is spying on her, and Holly will need to decide how far she is willing to go to survive.
A psychological thriller unlike anything you’ve read before...
400 pages, Paperback
First published August 1, 2019
70 people are currently reading
1625 people want to read
About the author
Claire Kendal
6 books415 followersClaire Kendal's first novel was THE BOOK OF YOU. It was a Sunday Times bestseller and a Richard & Judy Book Club pick. THE SECOND SISTER was published in 2017 and I SPY in 2019. Her fourth novel, MAKE YOU MINE, will be published in 2026. Claire teaches English Literature and Creative Writing, and lives in the South West of England with her family.
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 225 reviews
September 8, 2019
I Spy with my little eye a good book!
Claire Kendal cleverly blends a spy thriller with a psychological thriller in this compelling story. This was a riveting and refreshing read that kept me guessing. Holly always wanted to be a spy and her dream almost came true. Unfortunately Holly didn't make the final cut and instead found herself working in a hospital. FlashForward a few years and Holly is approached by MI5 to spy on her partner Zac. However Holly is not privy as to why she needs to be spying on her partner and information is given on a need to know basis; and apparently Holly doesn't need to know much of anything. What transpires is Holly caught up in a web of deceit and lies ultimately leading to loss.
The story ping-pongs back-and-forth between past and present. The alternating chapters were cleverly titled and I found this easy to follow. Holly was a well-developed and likable protagonist. I completely sympathize with her plight and was right there with her searching for the truth. There was the perfect amount of tension and anticipation running through the story, kept me completely invested. Twists and turns and an ending I did not see coming. And that final ending, all I can say is well played!
This book in three emoji's: 🔍 🏥 🧐
September 12, 2020
Some obsessions are not worth bothering with:
Q:‘It was humiliating. Do you ever consider what it means to someone to work so hard to try to join you, to want to devote herself to that, to protecting her country, and then to discover she’s not good enough?’ (c)
At least some 'modern-day Bluebeards’ are not the best relationship material. Who would've guessed? A spy-in-the-making (or -failing), of course.
Q: You are Pandora, Holly. It’s in your blood, that impulse to look where you shouldn’t. (c) How very astute. Gawd, Holly has the patience of a saint. Fine lines in life, fine prints at work - what else do we regularly miss if we aren't Pandora material?
This girl's parents died in a car crash (possibly a fiery one) and her grandma goes on to read the girl a story about some Matilda (same name as the dead mom's) who 'told lies and was burned to death'. Now that's creative bringing up. Brrr.
Q:
All in all, the effect of my grandmother’s cautionary tales was not what she intended. They just gave me ideas about the interesting things I could do, and alerted me to potential disasters so I could try to figure out how to avoid them, though I didn’t always succeed. (c) Who would have guessed?
Zac Hunter, very bad news and some freaky hobbies. Now, that's some peculiar mix if I've ever read one:
Q:
Two of his great passions all in one compact container. Taboo sex, and information theft. Naked women in impossible poses, and the rights of human beings to control their own data. (c)
Overall, a very macabre-ish story with a very strange ending in a very strange place.
Was everyone supposed to be as disconnected from reality in this one as it read to me?
Other:
Q:
I had been obsessed with spies since I was a very little girl. (c)
Q:
It was only later that I learned that spies were supposed to keep to what was true, and were trained to be cautious about what they put on paper – two principles I wasn’t very good at heeding. (c) So, are we getting an unreliable narrator here?
Q:
It’s all about using this.’ She almost smiled. She placed a hand on each side of her head without actually touching it. ‘Rather than that’ – she lowered her hands from her breasts to her hips, again without touching herself – ‘to get what you need. (c)
Q:
‘Are you offering me a proper job with the Security Service?’
‘You have access to intelligence that we need, and we know you’re skilful enough to get it for us.’
‘No you don’t. You don’t think that about me at all. I seem to remember that flattery is part of that script for recruiting informants, too.’
‘It is, as a matter of fact. But I do think you’re skilful – there was only that one critical flaw that ended the possibility of your joining us.’ (с)
Q:
‘Flattering and confiding all in one move – you’re a master of that recruitment script, but it’s not working. (c)
Q:
‘The answer’s no.’
‘It won’t kill you to think about it, and to be gently watchful while you do.’
‘Again … no.’ (c)
Q:
There was room in the world for all kinds of mermaids. (c)
Q:
Not many people drink their tea with no milk. (c) Oh, give me a break, Sherlock. Plenty do. Tea with milk is like piss, only grosser.
Q:
His taste in books, all hardbacks and dust-free, was unsurprising – medical ethics, law, artificial intelligence, and the surveillance state. He especially liked it when these subjects intersected. (c)
Q:
‘It’s not me. I hope I don’t look lost or missing, because I know exactly where I am.’ (c)
Q:
Four years earlier, when I’d tried to join MI5, I’d created an email account using the name Helen Graham. I’d also got hold of a photo ID and credit card to match, thinking even then that I might need them some day. (c)
Q:
I will never know. Is that why I am the way I am, always trying to find things out, to compensate for knowledge that is impossibly out of my reach? (c)
Q:
… there’s probably some fetish group who are into pregnant women, with Zac as their president.’ (c)
Q:
Zac was so passionately on the side of those who fought for individual freedoms and stood up to authority, yet so against the people closest to him having any freedom themselves. It occurred to me that such a paradox wasn’t unusual. Sometimes when you knew too much about how a thing worked, even if you thought it was wrong in principle, or that it should only be used for a larger good, you still couldn’t help trying it yourself. And then it became a habit. Wasn’t I guilty of this too? (c)
Q:
No better way to get a man to love you forever than to run away from him. (c)
Q:‘It was humiliating. Do you ever consider what it means to someone to work so hard to try to join you, to want to devote herself to that, to protecting her country, and then to discover she’s not good enough?’ (c)
At least some 'modern-day Bluebeards’ are not the best relationship material. Who would've guessed? A spy-in-the-making (or -failing), of course.
Q: You are Pandora, Holly. It’s in your blood, that impulse to look where you shouldn’t. (c) How very astute. Gawd, Holly has the patience of a saint. Fine lines in life, fine prints at work - what else do we regularly miss if we aren't Pandora material?
This girl's parents died in a car crash (possibly a fiery one) and her grandma goes on to read the girl a story about some Matilda (same name as the dead mom's) who 'told lies and was burned to death'. Now that's creative bringing up. Brrr.
Q:
All in all, the effect of my grandmother’s cautionary tales was not what she intended. They just gave me ideas about the interesting things I could do, and alerted me to potential disasters so I could try to figure out how to avoid them, though I didn’t always succeed. (c) Who would have guessed?
Zac Hunter, very bad news and some freaky hobbies. Now, that's some peculiar mix if I've ever read one:
Q:
Two of his great passions all in one compact container. Taboo sex, and information theft. Naked women in impossible poses, and the rights of human beings to control their own data. (c)
Overall, a very macabre-ish story with a very strange ending in a very strange place.
Was everyone supposed to be as disconnected from reality in this one as it read to me?
Other:
Q:
I had been obsessed with spies since I was a very little girl. (c)
Q:
It was only later that I learned that spies were supposed to keep to what was true, and were trained to be cautious about what they put on paper – two principles I wasn’t very good at heeding. (c) So, are we getting an unreliable narrator here?
Q:
It’s all about using this.’ She almost smiled. She placed a hand on each side of her head without actually touching it. ‘Rather than that’ – she lowered her hands from her breasts to her hips, again without touching herself – ‘to get what you need. (c)
Q:
‘Are you offering me a proper job with the Security Service?’
‘You have access to intelligence that we need, and we know you’re skilful enough to get it for us.’
‘No you don’t. You don’t think that about me at all. I seem to remember that flattery is part of that script for recruiting informants, too.’
‘It is, as a matter of fact. But I do think you’re skilful – there was only that one critical flaw that ended the possibility of your joining us.’ (с)
Q:
‘Flattering and confiding all in one move – you’re a master of that recruitment script, but it’s not working. (c)
Q:
‘The answer’s no.’
‘It won’t kill you to think about it, and to be gently watchful while you do.’
‘Again … no.’ (c)
Q:
There was room in the world for all kinds of mermaids. (c)
Q:
Not many people drink their tea with no milk. (c) Oh, give me a break, Sherlock. Plenty do. Tea with milk is like piss, only grosser.
Q:
His taste in books, all hardbacks and dust-free, was unsurprising – medical ethics, law, artificial intelligence, and the surveillance state. He especially liked it when these subjects intersected. (c)
Q:
‘It’s not me. I hope I don’t look lost or missing, because I know exactly where I am.’ (c)
Q:
Four years earlier, when I’d tried to join MI5, I’d created an email account using the name Helen Graham. I’d also got hold of a photo ID and credit card to match, thinking even then that I might need them some day. (c)
Q:
I will never know. Is that why I am the way I am, always trying to find things out, to compensate for knowledge that is impossibly out of my reach? (c)
Q:
… there’s probably some fetish group who are into pregnant women, with Zac as their president.’ (c)
Q:
Zac was so passionately on the side of those who fought for individual freedoms and stood up to authority, yet so against the people closest to him having any freedom themselves. It occurred to me that such a paradox wasn’t unusual. Sometimes when you knew too much about how a thing worked, even if you thought it was wrong in principle, or that it should only be used for a larger good, you still couldn’t help trying it yourself. And then it became a habit. Wasn’t I guilty of this too? (c)
Q:
No better way to get a man to love you forever than to run away from him. (c)
April 10, 2019
We are introduced to Holly who is being interviewed to become a spy, all her studies seem to have payed off until the last hurdle where she fails!!
Holly moves on and marries Zak. She is approached by the woman who interviewed her for the spy job and asks her to spy on someone close to her. This drastically changes the course of her life causing Holly to pack up and flee.
Holly now called Helen is working at the hospital when she meets Eliza and her daughter Alice. Is someone spying on her?
A riveting book with twists and turns that will keep you guessing. The different timelines are easy to follow. I thoroughly recommend this book.
Thank you to Netgalley for my copy in exchange for a review.
Holly moves on and marries Zak. She is approached by the woman who interviewed her for the spy job and asks her to spy on someone close to her. This drastically changes the course of her life causing Holly to pack up and flee.
Holly now called Helen is working at the hospital when she meets Eliza and her daughter Alice. Is someone spying on her?
A riveting book with twists and turns that will keep you guessing. The different timelines are easy to follow. I thoroughly recommend this book.
Thank you to Netgalley for my copy in exchange for a review.
April 19, 2019
I really enjoyed Second Sister by Claire Kendal and was delighted to be asked to read her new book I Spy.
This book started off well for me but because the timeline jumped about I found the story confusing.
Holly always wanted to be a spy but things became complicated and dangerous when she was asked to spy on her partner.
She is now in hiding and in fear for her safety.
I would like to thank NetGalley and Harper Collins for me e-copy in exchange for an honest review.
This book started off well for me but because the timeline jumped about I found the story confusing.
Holly always wanted to be a spy but things became complicated and dangerous when she was asked to spy on her partner.
She is now in hiding and in fear for her safety.
I would like to thank NetGalley and Harper Collins for me e-copy in exchange for an honest review.
May 22, 2019
I Spy is a cleverly twisted two pronged tale, with an intriguing premise and some engaging characters.
Holly is hiding from the world, a failed attempt at espionage haunting her. Told in past and present we discover what happened to Holly, why a chance encounter with a child sets her on a dangerous path and who may be watching her every move…
There are some terrifically unexpected elements to this story, keeping you turning the pages. It is a kind of domestic noir/spy thriller hybrid written with a very human touch and completely riveting throughout.
Overall a really great read with a pitch perfect ending.
Recommended.
Holly is hiding from the world, a failed attempt at espionage haunting her. Told in past and present we discover what happened to Holly, why a chance encounter with a child sets her on a dangerous path and who may be watching her every move…
There are some terrifically unexpected elements to this story, keeping you turning the pages. It is a kind of domestic noir/spy thriller hybrid written with a very human touch and completely riveting throughout.
Overall a really great read with a pitch perfect ending.
Recommended.
February 25, 2020
This one wasnt for me unfortunately. Confusing time frames, unlikeable waifer thin characters, totally unbelievable story line. I could go on.
When I finally did get towards the end I was thankful and thought the book couldnt annoy me any more but it did. A ridiculous ending that was I guess in keeping with the book but as a "surprise" ending it was laughable really.
Sorry but I have little good to say about this one unfortunately. Hopefully others enjoyed it more.
Many thanks to Netgalley, HarperCollins and Claire Kendal for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
When I finally did get towards the end I was thankful and thought the book couldnt annoy me any more but it did. A ridiculous ending that was I guess in keeping with the book but as a "surprise" ending it was laughable really.
Sorry but I have little good to say about this one unfortunately. Hopefully others enjoyed it more.
Many thanks to Netgalley, HarperCollins and Claire Kendal for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
July 28, 2019
Holly Lawrence's ambition is to become a spy. But her experience proved to be more dangerous than she imagined. Now she has to live hiding away, under an assumed name. She can't trust anyone. But now her new live is beginning to unravel. This time,someone is spying on Holly. But how far is she willing to go to survive?
I liked the authors style in writing this book, even though it is a little complex. She dealt with abuse, coercive relationships and baby loss with sensitivity. The characters are well rounded and the story is told from Holly's point of view. A well constructed plot that has many twists. This is far from a predictable read and it held my interest throughout.
I would like to thank NetGalley, HarperCollins UK, HarperFiction and the author Claire Kendal for my ARC in exchange for an honest review.
I liked the authors style in writing this book, even though it is a little complex. She dealt with abuse, coercive relationships and baby loss with sensitivity. The characters are well rounded and the story is told from Holly's point of view. A well constructed plot that has many twists. This is far from a predictable read and it held my interest throughout.
I would like to thank NetGalley, HarperCollins UK, HarperFiction and the author Claire Kendal for my ARC in exchange for an honest review.
August 29, 2019
Not for me at all, although I did finish it (hence two stars and not one). A pageturner for sure but the story, for me, is utterly unbelievable and implausible, told with a confused structure and populated by some very unlikely and unpleasant people. I stuck with it to see how it would end, expecting something rather clever, but it wasn't in the least and made me wish I hadn't read it. Fortunately, a fast read.
September 8, 2020
Who is spying who?
I enjoyed this book and it definitely keep me glued till the end, but I had a problem at the beginning with the writing style. The story has two timeline and I had an hard time following the jumps in between, but once I got accustomed to the fact that there is a past and a present, I was fine.
It could have have been a 4 stars, but I didn’t like the ending and I felt that there are a few unanswered questions.
I enjoyed this book and it definitely keep me glued till the end, but I had a problem at the beginning with the writing style. The story has two timeline and I had an hard time following the jumps in between, but once I got accustomed to the fact that there is a past and a present, I was fine.
It could have have been a 4 stars, but I didn’t like the ending and I felt that there are a few unanswered questions.
May 16, 2019
This is really enjoyable read and a mystery with a difference, the spying aspect of the story was very different and I loved the character of Holly. Told from alternating timelines it makes a compulsive read that I found entertaining, well written and something different from the norm. I have been on a run of excellent books recently so I am always apprehensive when starting a new one but this really did hit the mark and I look forward to reading more from Claire Kendal in the future. So if you want a mystery with a difference then you a good one here and I really recommend it.
My thanks to NetGalley and Harper Collins Uk for giving me the chance to read the ARC in exchange for my honest opinion.
My thanks to NetGalley and Harper Collins Uk for giving me the chance to read the ARC in exchange for my honest opinion.
September 2, 2019
3.5 stars rounded up. The description of the book states, "A psychological thriller unlike anything you’ve read before..." and that is certainly true. I had a hard time getting into this story and had to start over after listening to a few chapters. That allowed me to get my bearings and follow the story. It is told in two timelines a couple of years apart. Holly narrates the story sharing her experiences as a spy for M15, which cost her something very dear.
She wanted a job with M15, but after her initial interview she is turned down and gets a job as a ward clerk in a local hospital. At this time, she is approached by M15 to work for them, spying on her then boyfriend, a doctor at the hospital. Holly does not know why, but does what she is asked. Zach becomes abusive with her and she feels like a prisoner. When she becomes pregnant he becomes even more controlling and she wants out. M15 promises to get her to freedom, but needs to take time to do it properly. Unfortunately, they are too late for her unborn child. When she finally gets out, she is in hiding from Zach, but someone walks into her life that causes her to rethink everything she has been told.
This was a story that could be true, which is why it is a bit scary. Holly was an unreliable narrator for me. I never knew what to believe or what she would do next. All her various contacts and friends seemed to have their own agenda. Her contacts in M15 were very unlikable and seemed to be using her to reach their goal, not really seeming to care what was going to happen to her and others. The chapters in the book went from the present to her life before she went into hiding, so it is important to pay close attention to the story. When it all ended, parts were satisfying, but there were still some unanswered questions for me. I am not sure what I thought about this book. I am waffling between 3 or 4 stars.
I listened to the audiobook of this story narrated by Imogen Church. I have listened to other books she has narrated and always enjoy her performance. She gives each character their own voice as well as adding expression to the story to make it come alive. Her narration made I Spy a very entertaining and enjoyable story. The publisher generously provided me with a copy of this book upon my request. The rating, ideas and opinions shared are my own.
She wanted a job with M15, but after her initial interview she is turned down and gets a job as a ward clerk in a local hospital. At this time, she is approached by M15 to work for them, spying on her then boyfriend, a doctor at the hospital. Holly does not know why, but does what she is asked. Zach becomes abusive with her and she feels like a prisoner. When she becomes pregnant he becomes even more controlling and she wants out. M15 promises to get her to freedom, but needs to take time to do it properly. Unfortunately, they are too late for her unborn child. When she finally gets out, she is in hiding from Zach, but someone walks into her life that causes her to rethink everything she has been told.
This was a story that could be true, which is why it is a bit scary. Holly was an unreliable narrator for me. I never knew what to believe or what she would do next. All her various contacts and friends seemed to have their own agenda. Her contacts in M15 were very unlikable and seemed to be using her to reach their goal, not really seeming to care what was going to happen to her and others. The chapters in the book went from the present to her life before she went into hiding, so it is important to pay close attention to the story. When it all ended, parts were satisfying, but there were still some unanswered questions for me. I am not sure what I thought about this book. I am waffling between 3 or 4 stars.
I listened to the audiobook of this story narrated by Imogen Church. I have listened to other books she has narrated and always enjoy her performance. She gives each character their own voice as well as adding expression to the story to make it come alive. Her narration made I Spy a very entertaining and enjoyable story. The publisher generously provided me with a copy of this book upon my request. The rating, ideas and opinions shared are my own.
October 5, 2019
This is a thriller of sorts. I liked the 1st person POV. It worked well here. There was a lot of toggling around in the time lines. That isn't my favorite, but it worked with the story line. Although, at times, it felt overused.
The overall pace was fast. There were so many twists in this. I think I liked that the most. It never got boring....a little far fetched...but never boring. The ending didn't feel satisfying, but I loved the last twist. It fit perfectly to the MC. So that redeemed the overall effect of the ending.
Now the MC was well done. There was so much internal dialogue, but not once did that bother me. There was always something to glean from it. I felt her angst. As far as the other characters go, they were never as vivid as the MC. They felt like background at times even when it was their turn to shine. That wasn't a deal breaker. Overall, I liked this one....so 3 stars.
The overall pace was fast. There were so many twists in this. I think I liked that the most. It never got boring....a little far fetched...but never boring. The ending didn't feel satisfying, but I loved the last twist. It fit perfectly to the MC. So that redeemed the overall effect of the ending.
Now the MC was well done. There was so much internal dialogue, but not once did that bother me. There was always something to glean from it. I felt her angst. As far as the other characters go, they were never as vivid as the MC. They felt like background at times even when it was their turn to shine. That wasn't a deal breaker. Overall, I liked this one....so 3 stars.
September 4, 2020
I Spy
is the first book I've read by the author.
I was intrigued because I liked the blurb:
Holly has longed to be a spy for MI5 since she was a child but a botched interview derails her chance.
When her relationship with a charismatic doctor, Zach, brings her to the attention of her ex-future superiors, Holly is tasked to spy on Zach.
After a devastating loss, a few years later, Holly is living under a new name with a new job in a different city. But, the appearance of a young mother and child calls up unresolved feelings and the return of an old enemy.
Sounds pretty good, right? But, no. I had a few caveats.
** Minor spoilers ahead **
1. I didn't like Holly. I found her incredibly annoying.
There was something very childish, immature about her personality, perhaps because she was raised by a grandmother and was always looking for a father figure, very Freudian but typical.
I couldn't relate to Holly, much less sympathize with her.
2. Zach as your typical abusive tool. Not only did I not believe in their relationship but I definitely didn't believe in his rehabilitation.
I almost threw the book across the room when I got to the part where he justified his abuse toward Holly because she was the only person 'he cared about' and he had never abused anyone else, just Holly, because he loved her.
Someone get me a bucket. I need to puke!
3. Coincidence. I don't believe in it, never have, never will.
What are the odds that Holly will hook up with a man suspected of murdering his first wife and MI5 needs her help?
Does MI5 make it a habit to recruit civilians in their spy games? Is this normal protocol?
4. It's hard to write a novel with past and present timelines. I have yet to find an author who can do this well.
I know its necessary to provide exposition but there's a lot of flip flopping here and it got distracting.
Also, this was about 100 pages too long.
5. Complete suspension of disbelief when all the "twists" and "secrets" are revealed. See #3.
I think if this had been about Holly as a spy, that would have been more exciting and suspenseful than another domestic drama with convoluted twists.
I was intrigued because I liked the blurb:
Holly has longed to be a spy for MI5 since she was a child but a botched interview derails her chance.
When her relationship with a charismatic doctor, Zach, brings her to the attention of her ex-future superiors, Holly is tasked to spy on Zach.
After a devastating loss, a few years later, Holly is living under a new name with a new job in a different city. But, the appearance of a young mother and child calls up unresolved feelings and the return of an old enemy.
Sounds pretty good, right? But, no. I had a few caveats.
** Minor spoilers ahead **
1. I didn't like Holly. I found her incredibly annoying.
There was something very childish, immature about her personality, perhaps because she was raised by a grandmother and was always looking for a father figure, very Freudian but typical.
I couldn't relate to Holly, much less sympathize with her.
2. Zach as your typical abusive tool. Not only did I not believe in their relationship but I definitely didn't believe in his rehabilitation.
I almost threw the book across the room when I got to the part where he justified his abuse toward Holly because she was the only person 'he cared about' and he had never abused anyone else, just Holly, because he loved her.
Someone get me a bucket. I need to puke!
3. Coincidence. I don't believe in it, never have, never will.
What are the odds that Holly will hook up with a man suspected of murdering his first wife and MI5 needs her help?
Does MI5 make it a habit to recruit civilians in their spy games? Is this normal protocol?
4. It's hard to write a novel with past and present timelines. I have yet to find an author who can do this well.
I know its necessary to provide exposition but there's a lot of flip flopping here and it got distracting.
Also, this was about 100 pages too long.
5. Complete suspension of disbelief when all the "twists" and "secrets" are revealed. See #3.
I think if this had been about Holly as a spy, that would have been more exciting and suspenseful than another domestic drama with convoluted twists.
August 8, 2019
Overall, I liked this thriller. It is quite complex and has a great number of twists where you just aren't sure who is good and who is not. It could have been a 4 star for me, but I really didn't like the ending, and there was a lot about Zac that I didn't care for.
It's an overall great thriller, but you'll have to overlook some eye-rolling conveniences. Core story is decently written. TW: Domestic abuse, including that of a pregnant woman.
I voluntarily reviewed a complimentary copy of this book, all opinions are my own.
It's an overall great thriller, but you'll have to overlook some eye-rolling conveniences. Core story is decently written. TW: Domestic abuse, including that of a pregnant woman.
I voluntarily reviewed a complimentary copy of this book, all opinions are my own.
July 29, 2019
This book took me a while to get into but then I was hooked.
The chapters are a bit erratic if you look at the date/year but if you just get in your mind it’s kind of a before and after the event, it’ll help.
Holly has moved on with her life, or so she thinks, and then the past creeps up on her.
This is a hard one to review as even talking about her life before it happens could spoil it for you.
I can say this is an engrossing book that definitely keeps your attention, and is one of those books that has you trying to work out what’s going to happen next.
Thanks to Harper Collins and NetGalley for the opportunity to read this book.
The chapters are a bit erratic if you look at the date/year but if you just get in your mind it’s kind of a before and after the event, it’ll help.
Holly has moved on with her life, or so she thinks, and then the past creeps up on her.
This is a hard one to review as even talking about her life before it happens could spoil it for you.
I can say this is an engrossing book that definitely keeps your attention, and is one of those books that has you trying to work out what’s going to happen next.
Thanks to Harper Collins and NetGalley for the opportunity to read this book.
August 22, 2019
Time taken to read - 1 day
Pages - 400
Publisher - Harper Collins
Source - Review copy
Blurb from Goodreads
Someone is watching your every move…
Holly Lawrence always wanted to be a spy, but the experience proved more dangerous than anything she imagined. Now, Holly lives in hiding under an assumed name. She avoids relationships and trusts no one.
But Holly’s new life begins to unravel when she encounters a young mother and her two-year-old child… a child who reminds her of a past she has tried hard to forget. This time, someone is spying on her, and Holly will need to decide how far she is willing to go to survive.
A psychological thriller unlike anything you’ve read before...
My Review
Holly Lawrence has always liked watching people, finding things out so it stands to reason she would go and interview to become a spy. When her interview bombs she goes back to normal life. The story splits into two timelines, the before and the now, present day. The before we find Holly in a controlling relationship that chills the further you get into it. Present day she has had to remove herself from her old life, people she loved, to stay safe. You can never outrun your past and Holly finds herself being tested and putting her own safety in danger to save another.
It took me a wee bit to settle into the book, the timeline jumps, the different characters and getting to grips with who Holly is. She is a bit of an up/down character. She shows some signs of strength and bravery yet others you get so frustrated at some of her choices.
There is such a mix in this book, the spy thing turns up again so you get a feel of that running through a book that is heavily focused on a coercive and abusive relationship. This thing with this is the abuser doesn't use violence but how he maintains control has your gorge rising because it is masked as caring you can see just how effective this is.
I have read this author before and will read her again, she creates environments for her characters that makes for uncomfortable but utterly compelling reading, 3.5/5 for me this time!
Pages - 400
Publisher - Harper Collins
Source - Review copy
Blurb from Goodreads
Someone is watching your every move…
Holly Lawrence always wanted to be a spy, but the experience proved more dangerous than anything she imagined. Now, Holly lives in hiding under an assumed name. She avoids relationships and trusts no one.
But Holly’s new life begins to unravel when she encounters a young mother and her two-year-old child… a child who reminds her of a past she has tried hard to forget. This time, someone is spying on her, and Holly will need to decide how far she is willing to go to survive.
A psychological thriller unlike anything you’ve read before...
My Review
Holly Lawrence has always liked watching people, finding things out so it stands to reason she would go and interview to become a spy. When her interview bombs she goes back to normal life. The story splits into two timelines, the before and the now, present day. The before we find Holly in a controlling relationship that chills the further you get into it. Present day she has had to remove herself from her old life, people she loved, to stay safe. You can never outrun your past and Holly finds herself being tested and putting her own safety in danger to save another.
It took me a wee bit to settle into the book, the timeline jumps, the different characters and getting to grips with who Holly is. She is a bit of an up/down character. She shows some signs of strength and bravery yet others you get so frustrated at some of her choices.
There is such a mix in this book, the spy thing turns up again so you get a feel of that running through a book that is heavily focused on a coercive and abusive relationship. This thing with this is the abuser doesn't use violence but how he maintains control has your gorge rising because it is masked as caring you can see just how effective this is.
I have read this author before and will read her again, she creates environments for her characters that makes for uncomfortable but utterly compelling reading, 3.5/5 for me this time!
August 12, 2019
It pains me to give such a lower rating to this novel, specially bc I have been waiting for so long for this author's next work… I absolutely lived her first 2 novels and her precise and beautiful writing style is present here. The story flows easily and reading is a pleasure. The dialogues are solid and all characters fell real.
Why only 2 stars then? Because of the story itself. This was way over the top for me and not in a good way. It felt convoluted, far-fetched, something I'd expect in a lifetime movie of a spy.
In fact, I kept reading totally sure that by the end we'd learn that it was all Holly's fabrication. That she was delusional about the whole MI5 thing, had never tried to be a spy and had just invented Maxine, Martin, and George in her mind. And that would have ben more plausible and made the rating go up a bit but as it is… the story does not make much sense to me and I can't really buy it, sorry.
Why only 2 stars then? Because of the story itself. This was way over the top for me and not in a good way. It felt convoluted, far-fetched, something I'd expect in a lifetime movie of a spy.
In fact, I kept reading totally sure that by the end we'd learn that it was all Holly's fabrication. That she was delusional about the whole MI5 thing, had never tried to be a spy and had just invented Maxine, Martin, and George in her mind. And that would have ben more plausible and made the rating go up a bit but as it is… the story does not make much sense to me and I can't really buy it, sorry.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
September 16, 2019
This wasn't a great reading experience. From the beginning, I had a hard time getting into the story because of the writing style. There wasn't a good flow to the sequence of events and the spy thing felt almost secondary. Overall, the plot felt implausible if not ridiculous. Another qualm is the main character, Holly. She is weak, lacking in self worth and confidence, and reeks of uncertainty.
August 11, 2019
Started out intriguing but interest waned the further I read...
July 20, 2023
"I know the day is going to be bad as soon as I see the kingfisher. He is so perfect, captured beneath the surface of the ice.
TW - baby loss/stillbirth
This was a fast paced story told from two separate timelines, both following Holly as she tries to get herself out of a bad situation. I was really enjoying it until it ended the way it did, because I have honestly never been more angry at a book character in my life. It left me feeling incredibly annoyed.
This one ended up being quite a difficult read for me. I'm not easily upset when it comes to what's in books, I'm usually okay with the mention of baby loss, but this one hit me really hard. I pretty much sobbed my way through the last few chapters. I really don't know why. My stillbirth and the character in the books couldn't have been any more different and it actually surprised me how much this one got to me.
TW - baby loss/stillbirth
This was a fast paced story told from two separate timelines, both following Holly as she tries to get herself out of a bad situation. I was really enjoying it until it ended the way it did, because I have honestly never been more angry at a book character in my life. It left me feeling incredibly annoyed.
This one ended up being quite a difficult read for me. I'm not easily upset when it comes to what's in books, I'm usually okay with the mention of baby loss, but this one hit me really hard. I pretty much sobbed my way through the last few chapters. I really don't know why. My stillbirth and the character in the books couldn't have been any more different and it actually surprised me how much this one got to me.
July 17, 2019
Holly has always wanted to be a spy and even got to interview with the MI5, years after rejection she finds herself having to use her old skills on someone she thought she could trust…
I really enjoy thrillers that jump between timelines to slowly reveal information to the reader as you go along. That along with a fascination of spies and I thought I Spy would be the perfect thriller for me. Unfortunately, jumping between past and present only really works if you know what’s going on in one of the timelines and additional, important information is then revealed in the other one. I Spy gets rid of that convention by making both timelines confusing and vague which means you can’t properly get invested in the plot or characters. I must admit after finishing the book although I feel like I got a good impression of Helen/Holly’s abusive marriage to Zac, I didn’t understand any of the actual spy plotline, why anyone was interested in her or her husband, what they were trying to achieve or ultimately the outcome of the events that unfolded. The story should have been straight forward but just ended up jumbled and confused from the start with a convoluted ending which felt unrealistic without proper resolution.
It didn’t help that in telling the story in garbled timelines and long flashbacks I never actually felt like we got to know the main character. Although some of the domestic abuse parts of the book I found difficult to read I never really felt sympathy for Helen/Holly and I felt like I never got to know or like any of the other characters introduced either. I must admit I felt like I was just ploughing through it in the end to get it finished without enjoying it or really understanding what was going on.
Overall I Spy has a jumbled mess of a plot without strong or interesting characters to hold interest – this read wasn’t for me I’m afraid. Thank you to NetGalley & Harper Collins UK – Harper Fictions for a chance to read the ARC in exchange for an honest review.
For more of my reviews go to www.kindig.co.uk
I really enjoy thrillers that jump between timelines to slowly reveal information to the reader as you go along. That along with a fascination of spies and I thought I Spy would be the perfect thriller for me. Unfortunately, jumping between past and present only really works if you know what’s going on in one of the timelines and additional, important information is then revealed in the other one. I Spy gets rid of that convention by making both timelines confusing and vague which means you can’t properly get invested in the plot or characters. I must admit after finishing the book although I feel like I got a good impression of Helen/Holly’s abusive marriage to Zac, I didn’t understand any of the actual spy plotline, why anyone was interested in her or her husband, what they were trying to achieve or ultimately the outcome of the events that unfolded. The story should have been straight forward but just ended up jumbled and confused from the start with a convoluted ending which felt unrealistic without proper resolution.
It didn’t help that in telling the story in garbled timelines and long flashbacks I never actually felt like we got to know the main character. Although some of the domestic abuse parts of the book I found difficult to read I never really felt sympathy for Helen/Holly and I felt like I never got to know or like any of the other characters introduced either. I must admit I felt like I was just ploughing through it in the end to get it finished without enjoying it or really understanding what was going on.
Overall I Spy has a jumbled mess of a plot without strong or interesting characters to hold interest – this read wasn’t for me I’m afraid. Thank you to NetGalley & Harper Collins UK – Harper Fictions for a chance to read the ARC in exchange for an honest review.
For more of my reviews go to www.kindig.co.uk
February 2, 2020
This one wasn’t for me. It’s not the book’s fault that part of the plot was triggering (pregnancy loss—do NOT recommend to anyone who is sensitive to that subject) but I also didn’t like anything else about the book. This ranking is more my experience reading than a reflection of the book itself but I didn’t love the narrative structure (flipping back and forth in time), I found the plot puzzlingly implausible (when I’m generally willing to suspend disbelief), and I loathed the conclusion. Definitely a miss for me.
May 14, 2019
Not a great storyline, difficult to follow and characters I didn’t really care about.
I struggled to finish it, so, although I’m sure it’s got an audience, it’s not me.
2*
Thanks to Netgalley and the publishers for the opportunity to preview.
I struggled to finish it, so, although I’m sure it’s got an audience, it’s not me.
2*
Thanks to Netgalley and the publishers for the opportunity to preview.
July 31, 2019
I was looking forward to reading this book, having read some very good reviews of it, but it did not quite work for me. One problem for me was the main protagonist and narrator, Holly/Helen. I could not warm to her at all. I definitely had sympathy for her in relation to her controlling boyfriend Zac (a thoroughly dislikeable man), but that is as far as it went. The portrayal of the slow drip, drip of increasing control and cutting Holly off from her friends was very realistic and chilling. Unfortunately, I found much of the rest of the book rather implausible.
The split timeline ended up just annoying me. In this book, I did not feel that it added anything, and the story could have been told at least as effectively in a linear fashion.
There are plenty of twists and turns in the book, and a fair amount of suspense, but I got to a point that I did not really care how things worked out, I just wanted to get to the end of the book.
My objections to the book are very personal, and from the other reviews I have read, are unique to me. It may just be the place I am in at the moment. So, my advice would be to give the book a go, and hopefully you will agree with the other reviewers.
I received this copy from the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review
The split timeline ended up just annoying me. In this book, I did not feel that it added anything, and the story could have been told at least as effectively in a linear fashion.
There are plenty of twists and turns in the book, and a fair amount of suspense, but I got to a point that I did not really care how things worked out, I just wanted to get to the end of the book.
My objections to the book are very personal, and from the other reviews I have read, are unique to me. It may just be the place I am in at the moment. So, my advice would be to give the book a go, and hopefully you will agree with the other reviewers.
I received this copy from the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review
September 16, 2019
This book didn't wow me. It is really difficult for me to rate because I actually felt like the writing was good! If I had to guess, my feelings about the book are more than likely based on the story. It was just too far-fetched.
The book begins with Holly interviewing for MI5 (spy network) but she isn't able to answer one very important question and isn't selected. Then we jump forward years later, and she is in an abusive relationship, living below her potential and still dreaming of being a spy. It gets a bit boring here, but then suddenly there is a big plot twist. The book jumps around a lot, which helps keep the reader guessing. I do think that Kendall does a good job of constructing a complex story, with twists and surprises along the way; however, there was a lot going on! I couldn't stay motivated to read it because I just didn't care enough about the story to put in that much effort. It may have just been the timing. I would give her another chance, simply because the writing quality was good.
Thank you to Harper Paperbacks for the advance copy via Edelweiss.
The book begins with Holly interviewing for MI5 (spy network) but she isn't able to answer one very important question and isn't selected. Then we jump forward years later, and she is in an abusive relationship, living below her potential and still dreaming of being a spy. It gets a bit boring here, but then suddenly there is a big plot twist. The book jumps around a lot, which helps keep the reader guessing. I do think that Kendall does a good job of constructing a complex story, with twists and surprises along the way; however, there was a lot going on! I couldn't stay motivated to read it because I just didn't care enough about the story to put in that much effort. It may have just been the timing. I would give her another chance, simply because the writing quality was good.
Thank you to Harper Paperbacks for the advance copy via Edelweiss.
dnf
March 1, 2021DNF @20%
2019; Harper Paperbacks/HarperCollins
I read about 20-ish% and I have decided to give up on Kendal. I read her previous novel, The Second Sister, and did not like it. I find the characterizations weak, so I cannot feel the motivation behind their actions. I am not the right audience for Kendal's books.
***I received a complimentary copy of this ebook from the publisher through Edelweiss. Opinions expressed in this review are entirely my own.***
2019; Harper Paperbacks/HarperCollins
I read about 20-ish% and I have decided to give up on Kendal. I read her previous novel, The Second Sister, and did not like it. I find the characterizations weak, so I cannot feel the motivation behind their actions. I am not the right audience for Kendal's books.
***I received a complimentary copy of this ebook from the publisher through Edelweiss. Opinions expressed in this review are entirely my own.***
July 2, 2020
Psychological thriller that failed to rapt my attention with its inept and far fetched twists and turns of the plot.
August 6, 2019
Trigger Warning:
Firstly I would like to thank HarperCollins Publishers and Claire Kendal for sending me an ARC copy of this book. All views and opinions shared here are my own.
I Spy follows the story of Holly Lawrence, a want to be spy who is thrown into a dangerous experience after falling in love with the wrong person. Holly is living under an assumed name and is constantly looking over her shoulder waiting for them to catch up with. Holly's life begins to unravel after she encounters a young mother and her daughter, a daughter who reminds Holly so much of her past life. Holly must decide how far she is going to go to survive.
This book sounded really intriguing and unique so I was really excited to read it but overall it felt a bit of a let-down to me? I really struggled to follow the story because we jump between timelines every chapter but it can be quite jarring at times to try and follow the story as you jump between the timelines. The pacing on the story isn't overly well done either in my opinion; at times its very slow when we're getting Holly's backstory and Jane's backstory and the current situation with Eliza, but then the last few chapters speed the story up quite a lot and it just doesn't really match the pacing of the rest of the story.
The characters aren't that easy to follow either. There are a number of characters who pop in and out of the story in the number of different ploy lines that at times it is hard to follow which storyline the character is existing in. I think the author had some good ideas but tried to put too many in the story an it just didn't overly work for me. All of the plot points relating to Jane just didn't resonate with me; first she's another one of Zac's victims and is likely killed by him, but then suddenly we find out she's alive (and then soon after killed) and came up with a plan with Zac to disappear, and then suddenly she's Alice's mother not Eliza. It just felt too much to me.
The character of Eliza is a whole other matter and i'm still confused on what she knew and what she didn't know. It never really felt clear to me what her role in all the Jane drama was until she took on Alice to raise as her own. For me it was just too many characters I was meant to invest in.
I do think Kendal is a really good writer and some aspects of the book were really well done. Specifically Holly's relationship with Zac and the slow drip of his controlling behaviours coming out. It was so realistic and terrifying and it really made me empathise with Holly and her struggle with their relationship. I also thought the last chapter added a real edge to the book; Holly deciding to resume her relationship with Zac with the aim of freeing Alice from him. I think this was a really good twist but was also really true to Holly's story.
Overall this book wasn't badly written, it was just overly complicated for me and the jarring timelines ruined the read for me slightly. But I do think Kendal is a good writer.
Firstly I would like to thank HarperCollins Publishers and Claire Kendal for sending me an ARC copy of this book. All views and opinions shared here are my own.
I Spy follows the story of Holly Lawrence, a want to be spy who is thrown into a dangerous experience after falling in love with the wrong person. Holly is living under an assumed name and is constantly looking over her shoulder waiting for them to catch up with. Holly's life begins to unravel after she encounters a young mother and her daughter, a daughter who reminds Holly so much of her past life. Holly must decide how far she is going to go to survive.
This book sounded really intriguing and unique so I was really excited to read it but overall it felt a bit of a let-down to me? I really struggled to follow the story because we jump between timelines every chapter but it can be quite jarring at times to try and follow the story as you jump between the timelines. The pacing on the story isn't overly well done either in my opinion; at times its very slow when we're getting Holly's backstory and Jane's backstory and the current situation with Eliza, but then the last few chapters speed the story up quite a lot and it just doesn't really match the pacing of the rest of the story.
The characters aren't that easy to follow either. There are a number of characters who pop in and out of the story in the number of different ploy lines that at times it is hard to follow which storyline the character is existing in. I think the author had some good ideas but tried to put too many in the story an it just didn't overly work for me. All of the plot points relating to Jane just didn't resonate with me; first she's another one of Zac's victims and is likely killed by him, but then suddenly we find out she's alive (and then soon after killed) and came up with a plan with Zac to disappear, and then suddenly she's Alice's mother not Eliza. It just felt too much to me.
The character of Eliza is a whole other matter and i'm still confused on what she knew and what she didn't know. It never really felt clear to me what her role in all the Jane drama was until she took on Alice to raise as her own. For me it was just too many characters I was meant to invest in.
I do think Kendal is a really good writer and some aspects of the book were really well done. Specifically Holly's relationship with Zac and the slow drip of his controlling behaviours coming out. It was so realistic and terrifying and it really made me empathise with Holly and her struggle with their relationship. I also thought the last chapter added a real edge to the book; Holly deciding to resume her relationship with Zac with the aim of freeing Alice from him. I think this was a really good twist but was also really true to Holly's story.
Overall this book wasn't badly written, it was just overly complicated for me and the jarring timelines ruined the read for me slightly. But I do think Kendal is a good writer.
July 29, 2019
When we first meet Holly she has just failed her interview to be a spy. Devastated, she picks herself up and gets on with her life. Fast forward several years and Holly is in hiding, living under an assumed name. She's ticking over nicely, mostly, until a random encounter with a young mother and her daughter in the hospital where she works sets off a warning in her head. Has her past come back to bite her? Along with this worry comes the feeling that she is being watched, the wannabe "spy" is being spied upon! But she's been in this situation before and knows the game. How far is she willing to go, both to get to the truth, or to survive?
Well, this book ticked on nicely for the majority. And then we came to the run up to the ending where it all went a bit, well, busy and incredible, and went a little bit off track for me. I'm not sure that the book tried a little to hard to be clever but that some of the key points got a bit lost in all the noise so it didn't quite come off. I also failed to connect properly with Holly which made it all a bit hard to sympathise/empathise with her along the way. That said, it didn't really drag, just let itself down a bit at the end.
Pacing was also a bit hit and miss and often not congruent with the current narrative. But, that said, there was no superfluous waffle and the story did get on with itself, on the whole, nicely.
All in all, a solid enough read that left me mostly satisfied at the end, albeit a bit perplexed. My thanks go to the Publisher and Netgalley for the chance to read this book.
Well, this book ticked on nicely for the majority. And then we came to the run up to the ending where it all went a bit, well, busy and incredible, and went a little bit off track for me. I'm not sure that the book tried a little to hard to be clever but that some of the key points got a bit lost in all the noise so it didn't quite come off. I also failed to connect properly with Holly which made it all a bit hard to sympathise/empathise with her along the way. That said, it didn't really drag, just let itself down a bit at the end.
Pacing was also a bit hit and miss and often not congruent with the current narrative. But, that said, there was no superfluous waffle and the story did get on with itself, on the whole, nicely.
All in all, a solid enough read that left me mostly satisfied at the end, albeit a bit perplexed. My thanks go to the Publisher and Netgalley for the chance to read this book.
June 11, 2019
I was so excited to get this book, and tried to start it immediately but just couldn’t get into it, eventually I did. I couldn’t give 5 stars, because the beginning just sort of left me not wanting to delve further, but when I finally made myself I did enjoy, so I would give a solid 4 stars! I think it’s written in that style I Kendal seems to use, and it’s a good one to utilize with thrillers. Very chilling, thrilling, and shocking, after the initial few chapters.
Will recommend to the members of Chapter Chatter Pub!
Will recommend to the members of Chapter Chatter Pub!
Displaying 1 - 30 of 225 reviews