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Embracing the Unknown: Life Lessons from the Tibetan Book of the Dead
Life, Death, and Rebirth—Pema Chödrön on The Tibetan Book of the Dead
What happens when we die? One of the most treasured resources for understanding this essential question is The Tibetan Book of the Dead. With Embracing the Unknown, Pema Chödrön delves into the teachings of this extraordinary Buddhist text—not only for what it tells us about the journey of the soul beyond this life, but also as a source of profound wisdom for navigating the uncertainty we face each day in "the bardo of this life." In this landmark appearance recorded live at the Omega Institute, Pema explores the universal mystery of life, death, and rebirth, including:
• What is the bardo? How any state between an ending and a beginning gives us an unparalleled opportunity for transformation
• What is rebirth? Pema takes a deeper look at this concept and how it also occurs in our moment-to-moment experience
• Can we let go? Guidance for honoring the difficult emotions of fear, sadness, and grief with an open and curious heart
• How can we prepare? Meditation techniques and everyday practices for befriending change, groundlessness, and the unknown
• What can we really know about death? Why the teachings of The Book of the Dead are valuable no matter what you believe
"Death isn’t just something that happens at the end," teaches Pema. "Life is continually arising, dwelling, ceasing, and arising. It’s a cycle that goes on every day, and continues to go on forever." Featuring insightful Q&A sessions with a live audience, Embracing the Unknown invites you to explore the most daunting and liberating truth of our human experience—guided by Pema Chödrön’s hallmark blend of insight, humor, and fearless love.
Runtime: 4 hours, 20 minutes.
What happens when we die? One of the most treasured resources for understanding this essential question is The Tibetan Book of the Dead. With Embracing the Unknown, Pema Chödrön delves into the teachings of this extraordinary Buddhist text—not only for what it tells us about the journey of the soul beyond this life, but also as a source of profound wisdom for navigating the uncertainty we face each day in "the bardo of this life." In this landmark appearance recorded live at the Omega Institute, Pema explores the universal mystery of life, death, and rebirth, including:
• What is the bardo? How any state between an ending and a beginning gives us an unparalleled opportunity for transformation
• What is rebirth? Pema takes a deeper look at this concept and how it also occurs in our moment-to-moment experience
• Can we let go? Guidance for honoring the difficult emotions of fear, sadness, and grief with an open and curious heart
• How can we prepare? Meditation techniques and everyday practices for befriending change, groundlessness, and the unknown
• What can we really know about death? Why the teachings of The Book of the Dead are valuable no matter what you believe
"Death isn’t just something that happens at the end," teaches Pema. "Life is continually arising, dwelling, ceasing, and arising. It’s a cycle that goes on every day, and continues to go on forever." Featuring insightful Q&A sessions with a live audience, Embracing the Unknown invites you to explore the most daunting and liberating truth of our human experience—guided by Pema Chödrön’s hallmark blend of insight, humor, and fearless love.
Runtime: 4 hours, 20 minutes.
4 pages, Audio CD
First published February 1, 2019
14 people are currently reading
449 people want to read
About the author
Pema Chödrön
189 books5,454 followersAni Pema Chödrön (Deirdre Blomfield-Brown) is an American Buddhist nun in the Tibetan tradition, closely associated with the Kagyu school and the Shambhala lineage.
She attended Miss Porter's School in Connecticut and graduated from the University of California at Berkeley. She taught as an elementary school teacher for many years in both New Mexico and California. Pema has two children and three grandchildren.
While in her mid-thirties, she traveled to the French Alps and encountered Lama Chime Rinpoche, with whom she studied for several years. She became a novice nun in 1974 while studying with Lama Chime in London. His Holiness the Sixteenth Karmapa came to England at that time, and Ani Pema received her ordination from him.
Ani Pema first met her root guru, Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche, in 1972. Lama Chime encouraged her to work with Trungpa, and it was with him that she ultimately made her most profound connection, studying with him from 1974 until his death in 1987. At the request of the Sixteenth Karmapa, she received the full bikshuni ordination in the Chinese lineage of Buddhism in 1981 in Hong Kong.
Ani Pema served as the director of the Karma Dzong, in Boulder, CO, until moving in 1984 to rural Cape Breton, Nova Scotia to be the director of Gampo Abbey. Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche gave her explicit instructions on establishing this monastery for western monks and nuns.
Ani Pema currently teaches in the United States and Canada and plans for an increased amount of time in solitary retreat under the guidance of Venerable Dzigar Kongtrul Rinpoche.
She attended Miss Porter's School in Connecticut and graduated from the University of California at Berkeley. She taught as an elementary school teacher for many years in both New Mexico and California. Pema has two children and three grandchildren.
While in her mid-thirties, she traveled to the French Alps and encountered Lama Chime Rinpoche, with whom she studied for several years. She became a novice nun in 1974 while studying with Lama Chime in London. His Holiness the Sixteenth Karmapa came to England at that time, and Ani Pema received her ordination from him.
Ani Pema first met her root guru, Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche, in 1972. Lama Chime encouraged her to work with Trungpa, and it was with him that she ultimately made her most profound connection, studying with him from 1974 until his death in 1987. At the request of the Sixteenth Karmapa, she received the full bikshuni ordination in the Chinese lineage of Buddhism in 1981 in Hong Kong.
Ani Pema served as the director of the Karma Dzong, in Boulder, CO, until moving in 1984 to rural Cape Breton, Nova Scotia to be the director of Gampo Abbey. Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche gave her explicit instructions on establishing this monastery for western monks and nuns.
Ani Pema currently teaches in the United States and Canada and plans for an increased amount of time in solitary retreat under the guidance of Venerable Dzigar Kongtrul Rinpoche.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 43 reviews
September 9, 2019
It's hard for me to even comprehend any human being who isn't frightened by death at all. I'm sure they exist but, as for me, I've been absolutely petrified by the concept since I can remember. I've really been going full court press on learning about Buddhism this year and Pema Chödron's name kept coming up. Once I realized she'd lectured specifically on this topic, I decided I should probably finally bend my ear. She's super down-to-earth, devoid of dogma, and a great communicator. She breaks down the concepts of the Tibetan Book of the Dead (mainly, the various bardos written about there) in a really simple way and lets you decide whether you want to view them as helpful metaphors or legitimate spiritual truths. Learning how to die seems to be one of the things you miss out on unless you've got some guidance, but Chödron really did make me a little less of a basket case about it. After all, the "me" that wrote this review was dead and gone by the time I posted it and the "you" that just read it isn't around anymore either and yet something of us remains. Maybe that means the final curtain isn't going to be that different either.
April 17, 2019
Ohhh, this was good. Pema Chodron has long been my favorite teacher, and she covers some new territory here, after the past couple of talks she's published as audiobooks were very worthwhile, but a bit more familiar territory for longtime followers of her work.
In "Embracing the Unknown", Ani Pema talks about that always-uncomfortable subject of death and how to face it with equanimity and even courage. Recorded at a recent retreat, the recording features a series of pithy talks, taking the listener through the Tibetan understanding of the Bardo, that tenuous place between death and rebirth. She also, right up front, reminds listeners that she doesn't expect anyone to buy into the Tibetan Buddhist notion of death/rebirth. She is only sharing a teaching and hopes people can apply it to whatever faith/reason journey they are on. I appreciate this as it allows listeners to let their guard down a bit and not feel like they are having dogma prescribed, but instead having dharma offered.
And rich dharma it is. She talks about how we can become more comfortable with impermanence, how rebirth is actually a daily choice, how we can better recognize moments to awaken to our nature and to what matters most, and how we can cultivate our propensities toward love and compassion for others and our selves.
It's some rich stuff, but delivered in a clear, warm manner that has become Pema's trademark. No preaching, just teaching.
A physical book titled "Welcoming the Unwelcomed" is coming out this fall, and I believe it is based on the same general topics, around facing death, working with grief, and the nature of the Bardo. As this was a more casual talk and that will be a more precisely edited and wordsmithed book, I look forward to reading it as a supplement to this audiobook, or perhaps vice versa.
Pema's teachings always resonate with me. This one was particularly meaningful, and as it clocks in at only about 3 1/2 hours, it's an 'easy listen'.
In "Embracing the Unknown", Ani Pema talks about that always-uncomfortable subject of death and how to face it with equanimity and even courage. Recorded at a recent retreat, the recording features a series of pithy talks, taking the listener through the Tibetan understanding of the Bardo, that tenuous place between death and rebirth. She also, right up front, reminds listeners that she doesn't expect anyone to buy into the Tibetan Buddhist notion of death/rebirth. She is only sharing a teaching and hopes people can apply it to whatever faith/reason journey they are on. I appreciate this as it allows listeners to let their guard down a bit and not feel like they are having dogma prescribed, but instead having dharma offered.
And rich dharma it is. She talks about how we can become more comfortable with impermanence, how rebirth is actually a daily choice, how we can better recognize moments to awaken to our nature and to what matters most, and how we can cultivate our propensities toward love and compassion for others and our selves.
It's some rich stuff, but delivered in a clear, warm manner that has become Pema's trademark. No preaching, just teaching.
A physical book titled "Welcoming the Unwelcomed" is coming out this fall, and I believe it is based on the same general topics, around facing death, working with grief, and the nature of the Bardo. As this was a more casual talk and that will be a more precisely edited and wordsmithed book, I look forward to reading it as a supplement to this audiobook, or perhaps vice versa.
Pema's teachings always resonate with me. This one was particularly meaningful, and as it clocks in at only about 3 1/2 hours, it's an 'easy listen'.
August 10, 2024
Practicing comfort, ease and acceptance of groundlessness. Letting things be, dying and being reborn even in this life.
February 2, 2020
To live well is to notice our propensities and choose how we want to be in the most subtle and nuanced ways. To live well is to prepare to death, and to learn to relax into the moments of our greatest uncertainties. I could listen to this talk many times and hear it anew each time.
June 20, 2025
Concise and descriptive. Pema Chodron explains in lay terms the essential elements of the Tibetan Book of the Dead. Especially helpful talks on the bardos.
August 21, 2021
So wise, so helpful.
August 29, 2024
This was an audio recording of a retreat lead by Pema Chödrön and listening to it makes me want to do more reconnecting with Buddhist ideas and teachings. Pema is so approachable, relatable, wise and motherly in her explanations of the teachings from the Tibetan book of the dead, she makes you really think about how you want to lead your life and how to best dissolve our fears of the future, the unexpected, the difficult, and ultimately our death.
July 29, 2021
I listened to an audio book and any 'quotes' here are paraphrased to the best I could do.
As a person of age and as someone who has been with 3 family members as they died, I wish I had read/listened to this book decades ago.
For myself, I would like to learn more about embracing impermanence.
For being with someone who is passing, dissolving, whatever your belief, there are things to
say to the person.
For grieving, there is the recommendation on embracing the grief.
(Paraphrased)
"The genuine heart of sadness can be a tender, open place where you feel connected."
This is the part that particularly touched me:
According to Tibetan belief the person is around for up to 42 days. (Other beliefs are not that different.)
If you loved someone or even if the relationship was conflicted:
Feel their presence.
Person's outer breath dissolves first, then the inner breath is going. Notice if the heart area is still warm.
Do virtuous acts for others, or for animals and dedicate to your loved one.
Do on your loved one's behalf. “May this help loved one.”
Think of the loved one with a lot of love.
Thank loved one.
Have conversations with loved one.
If any discomfit, fear, confusion.. Breathe in with wishes to be free of it all.
Do this when the loved one has died. Do it with love.
It is for yourself as much as for the loved one.
As a person of age and as someone who has been with 3 family members as they died, I wish I had read/listened to this book decades ago.
For myself, I would like to learn more about embracing impermanence.
For being with someone who is passing, dissolving, whatever your belief, there are things to
say to the person.
For grieving, there is the recommendation on embracing the grief.
(Paraphrased)
"The genuine heart of sadness can be a tender, open place where you feel connected."
This is the part that particularly touched me:
According to Tibetan belief the person is around for up to 42 days. (Other beliefs are not that different.)
If you loved someone or even if the relationship was conflicted:
Feel their presence.
Person's outer breath dissolves first, then the inner breath is going. Notice if the heart area is still warm.
Do virtuous acts for others, or for animals and dedicate to your loved one.
Do on your loved one's behalf. “May this help loved one.”
Think of the loved one with a lot of love.
Thank loved one.
Have conversations with loved one.
If any discomfit, fear, confusion.. Breathe in with wishes to be free of it all.
Do this when the loved one has died. Do it with love.
It is for yourself as much as for the loved one.
September 30, 2024
I am sickened to learn that Pema Chodron has been complicit to the sexual abuse in the lineage. Many women reported abuse to her, Judith Simmer-Brown and Judy Leaf. They did nothing. Pema never stepped down as a teacher. She never retired. She gave up her title. Everyone gave up their titles. This isn’t a virtuous gesture.
Before you lay into me with your defense for this woman, I strongly suggest you Google Shambhala sexual abuse. The history of rape, child molestation and abuse is endless and g continues to this day. Her head monk was just charged with voyeurism at her monastery - Gampo Abbey. The money from the books we buy goes to continue supporting this sick organization. It is absolutely heartbreaking to me she has become an apologist and has never come to support the victims.
https://matthewremski.medium.com/the-...
https://www.gurumag.com/pema-chodron-...
https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/nova-s...
I have more esteem for my spiritual development than to follow a sham.
Before you lay into me with your defense for this woman, I strongly suggest you Google Shambhala sexual abuse. The history of rape, child molestation and abuse is endless and g continues to this day. Her head monk was just charged with voyeurism at her monastery - Gampo Abbey. The money from the books we buy goes to continue supporting this sick organization. It is absolutely heartbreaking to me she has become an apologist and has never come to support the victims.
https://matthewremski.medium.com/the-...
https://www.gurumag.com/pema-chodron-...
https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/nova-s...
I have more esteem for my spiritual development than to follow a sham.
September 11, 2019
Powerful! Sometimes a book comes at the right time and this was certainly one of those. I have been dealing with a lot of change in my life and I listened to this at the end of summer -- a season I love and feeling heavy with dread at autumn's inevitable arrival. This book was EXACTLY what I needed, when I needed it. It felt like I was lucky enough to receive a gracious invitation to join Pema on a wonderful 3-day retreat. The subject matter was accessible and highly relevant -- moving at times and wise. She is also very funny and humour plays a big part in lightening what would otherwise be a very mundane and heavy topic. There is a lot of excellent material packed into a relatively short audiobook -- but basically, if you want to die well then you need to live well. And the secret to living well is overcoming our discomfort with impermanence.
I see myself returning to this often as there is so much life wisdom here. Highly recommended ...
I see myself returning to this often as there is so much life wisdom here. Highly recommended ...
March 2, 2021
Great audio book about practices to prepare for death.
Fear of death is related to fear of uncertainty/groundlessness. Pema gave practical advise on how to embrace and welcome groundlessness. She recommended trying to step into the "challenging zone" with curiosity and gentleness whenever we face difficult situations.
On the other hand, Pema describes in detail the process of death and what would happen after death. For me, familiarization helps to reduce the fear of "uncertainty".
Fear of death is related to fear of uncertainty/groundlessness. Pema gave practical advise on how to embrace and welcome groundlessness. She recommended trying to step into the "challenging zone" with curiosity and gentleness whenever we face difficult situations.
On the other hand, Pema describes in detail the process of death and what would happen after death. For me, familiarization helps to reduce the fear of "uncertainty".
December 25, 2019
This book is less about death than it is how to live. She speaks with clarity and humor on a subject most of us would rather not think about. A belief in the afterlife is not required to get something from this book. I strongly recommend the audio version so that you can hear her voice and audience feedback.
July 12, 2021
a powerful walk through sitting beside someone on their death bed, and how to heal your self, while helping them process saying goodbye to this life. Pema keeps us healing and human, while also making us laugh.
March 8, 2023
A short pleasant listen. I ran across this book looking for the Tibetan book of the Dead. Pena Chodron shares with a humility and happiness that’s infectious. Thought provoking lessons for both life and death that anybody can learn from.
November 30, 2024
Excellent talks by Pema Chodron on the bardo and dying. Short (4 hours). Listened on Hoopla. Perhaps there is an associated book? Also have it on Audible and listened to it again a couple of months later. It’s THAT good. A short take on the details of dying with some practices.
March 25, 2021
Every word this woman writes is golden. I would love, love LOVE to meet her one day. Truly, If we all only read books by Pema and no one else, we would die wise, indeed. #goals
December 9, 2025
Buddhism has always been an easy practice for me to connect with because its teachings make perfect sense in a practical and logical way. Pema Chödrön, an American Buddhist nun practicing in the Tibetan tradition, is one of several teachers I admire for her wisdom. Recently, I bought the audiobook of Embracing the Unknown: Life Lessons from the Tibetan Book of the Dead to learn more about the bardo of this life.
Recorded live during a retreat at the Omega Institute, this short audiobook features Pema Chödrön using the teachings of The Tibetan Book of the Dead to explore how awareness of death can help people live more fully and courageously in the present. She delves into topics like the bardo (transitional states), rebirth as a moment-to-moment process, and practical ways to manage fear, grief, and uncertainty in everyday life.
Despite being recorded at a retreat where audio distractions can be challenging, this audiobook is exceptionally well-produced. I’ve read a few books about death and dying, but this one was different because it focused specifically on the bardo. It was helpful for me to learn more about this journey.
Interestingly, someone asked if retirement was like a bardo, and Pema agreed. She encouraged the person to be aware that the behavioral tendencies they exhibited at work will likely carry over into retirement. I completely related to that sentiment. My work ethic has always been strong, and I definitely have a work-before-play mentality. I realize that my husband and I both have carried over our work behaviors into his artistic journey and my retirement. We’ve consistently worked on new projects before retirement and even now. Pema’s wisdom was validating as we recently had conversations about needing to reduce our time and energy on projects so that we can have more time for our hobbies.
I purchased the audiobook of Embracing the Unknown using my Audible membership. I absolutely love listening to Pema. She exudes patience and kindness as she shares her wisdom.
I have photos and additional information that I'm unable to include here. It can all be found on my blog, in the link below.
A Book And A Dog
Recorded live during a retreat at the Omega Institute, this short audiobook features Pema Chödrön using the teachings of The Tibetan Book of the Dead to explore how awareness of death can help people live more fully and courageously in the present. She delves into topics like the bardo (transitional states), rebirth as a moment-to-moment process, and practical ways to manage fear, grief, and uncertainty in everyday life.
Despite being recorded at a retreat where audio distractions can be challenging, this audiobook is exceptionally well-produced. I’ve read a few books about death and dying, but this one was different because it focused specifically on the bardo. It was helpful for me to learn more about this journey.
Interestingly, someone asked if retirement was like a bardo, and Pema agreed. She encouraged the person to be aware that the behavioral tendencies they exhibited at work will likely carry over into retirement. I completely related to that sentiment. My work ethic has always been strong, and I definitely have a work-before-play mentality. I realize that my husband and I both have carried over our work behaviors into his artistic journey and my retirement. We’ve consistently worked on new projects before retirement and even now. Pema’s wisdom was validating as we recently had conversations about needing to reduce our time and energy on projects so that we can have more time for our hobbies.
I purchased the audiobook of Embracing the Unknown using my Audible membership. I absolutely love listening to Pema. She exudes patience and kindness as she shares her wisdom.
I have photos and additional information that I'm unable to include here. It can all be found on my blog, in the link below.
A Book And A Dog
February 26, 2019
A solid 4 stars
26 February 2019
I wish that I had been armed with this knowledge when my paternal grandmother was dying. Chödrön discussing extreme thirst as the first step of dying was a punch to my heart and stirred memories of dabbing a damp sponge on her lips.
Because Embracing the Unknown is not a proper book, but a recording of Chödrön's appearance at the Omega Institute, I hesitated to include it here. Since I had to endure several of those pontificating 10-minute audience "questions" -- it counts!
I love the tone and meter of Chödrön's voice. I could listen to her read and explain a phone directory.
25 February 2019
It seems that I cannot get enough of learning how to prepare for and how to embrace death -- my own in particular.
26 February 2019
I wish that I had been armed with this knowledge when my paternal grandmother was dying. Chödrön discussing extreme thirst as the first step of dying was a punch to my heart and stirred memories of dabbing a damp sponge on her lips.
Because Embracing the Unknown is not a proper book, but a recording of Chödrön's appearance at the Omega Institute, I hesitated to include it here. Since I had to endure several of those pontificating 10-minute audience "questions" -- it counts!
I love the tone and meter of Chödrön's voice. I could listen to her read and explain a phone directory.
25 February 2019
It seems that I cannot get enough of learning how to prepare for and how to embrace death -- my own in particular.
July 15, 2025
I have little use for the parts of these talks in which Pema Chodron teaches what the Tibetan Book of the Dead says about what happens after death, but the focus of these talks was really about how we might reflect on these teachings to live a better life now, and to die more gracefully when the time comes.
Pema Chodron is always great to listen to, with her clear teaching, gentle voice and warm humor. This series of talks was no exception.
Pema Chodron is always great to listen to, with her clear teaching, gentle voice and warm humor. This series of talks was no exception.
February 15, 2021
A lovely book. It takes place at a conference Pema is speaking at. It is not only about the Tibetan Book of the Dead, but she also relates personal experiences of embracing the unknown. Pema is such a great speaker, and she does have some funny moments in her lecture. This is a great book for anyone who loves Pema as well as wants to learn to brace the unknown.
May 26, 2024
I found this to be a delightful book. The reason I experienced it thusly is related to not only the words of wisdom and depth perception of the issues which we were considering, there was also humor and reality in the words shared. I am encouraged to read more. I had read quite a bit about Buddhism in my younger years, but it’s been a while so it’s time to renew acquaintances!
March 5, 2023
I've heard about her and till now had been put off by her appearance... I know... - now, bowled over by her pleasant voice, playful and self-effacing manner - I loved this audio, looking for more of her writings ♡
June 10, 2023
I listened to the audio book, and I enjoyed it but not as much as When Things Fall Apart but it could just be because I am not in a place in my life where I feel like I need it. But as always with Pemas teachings, I am taking certain things and apply them :)
September 17, 2024
This is my first Pema Chödrön book/ teaching and it has been a wonderful discovery. I am undertaking a New spiritual Journey after leaving SGI. I really appreciate this teacher' down to earth preaching and connection between Traditional Buddhist texts and modern life.
May 28, 2019
Very useful in coping with death.
October 19, 2019
A beautiful way to think of the passing of a loved one. I will have to do some more research on this practice.
October 22, 2019
So much wisdom in this little gem.
December 23, 2019
Interesting and thoughtful delivery of Tibetan beliefs on death and dying. Ani Chodron does not disappoint.
May 7, 2020
I love her voice and her sense of humor.
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June 28, 20202nd time listening too. Pema always good and worth the listen - no matter how many times.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 43 reviews