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Grumpy Mom Takes a Holiday: Say Goodbye to Stressed, Tired, and Anxious, and Say Hello to Renewed Joy in Motherhood
"I feel so overwhelmed by the demands of being a mom." "I love my kids, but why do I so often feel frustrated?" "I want my kids to have good memories of me."
Let's face it: it's hard being a mom. To the world, motherhood is defined as spit-up-covered shirts; sleepless nights; and unshowered, never-ending days. If that is all there is to motherhood, then no wonder moms want to escape their lives sometimes!
Valerie Woerner believes that God's design for motherhood is so much better than you believe--and that while the doubts, burdens, and chaos will always be part of our lives, you don't have to settle for them. You can take a holiday from being the "grumpy mom" and become the mom God made you to be.
In Grumpy Mom Takes a Holiday, Valerie shows what God is revealing to her as his true desire for motherhood, which will inspire and equip you to find energy in the most unlikely places, pursue your own dreams, renew your friendships and connections with others, spend time with God when you don't have even a second to yourself, and more.
Grumpy Mom Takes a Holiday is the perfect tool to help you uncover His glorious plan for motherhood, complete with satisfaction, rest, freedom from guilt, and an abundance of joy.
Let's face it: it's hard being a mom. To the world, motherhood is defined as spit-up-covered shirts; sleepless nights; and unshowered, never-ending days. If that is all there is to motherhood, then no wonder moms want to escape their lives sometimes!
Valerie Woerner believes that God's design for motherhood is so much better than you believe--and that while the doubts, burdens, and chaos will always be part of our lives, you don't have to settle for them. You can take a holiday from being the "grumpy mom" and become the mom God made you to be.
In Grumpy Mom Takes a Holiday, Valerie shows what God is revealing to her as his true desire for motherhood, which will inspire and equip you to find energy in the most unlikely places, pursue your own dreams, renew your friendships and connections with others, spend time with God when you don't have even a second to yourself, and more.
Grumpy Mom Takes a Holiday is the perfect tool to help you uncover His glorious plan for motherhood, complete with satisfaction, rest, freedom from guilt, and an abundance of joy.
272 pages, Paperback
Published April 9, 2019
262 people are currently reading
2504 people want to read
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January 24, 2021
Are you all ready for a really long review? (I'm sorry in advance, but I couldn't make it shorter.)
Before I start, I just want to say up front that I really agonized over this review for one main reason - I'm really hoping the author will read this review.
I'm hoping she will read it because I think she is actually really talented. It's no small thing to write a book, and her voice is relatable and fun. I can tell that she really has a heart for the Lord and wants to serve the Lord well, and that goes a long way in my book. She also mentions a few times in the book the value of having a teachable spirit and being able to listen to a critique. I do have some critiques to give that I think are really important. I'm hoping the author reads this because I have no doubt that she will write another book in the future, and I hope she can consider these points when she does.
First, let's talk about what she did well!
Positives
This is such a great topic for a book in today's culture. I fully agree with the author's assessment of the problems with being a grumpy mom, and how the different aspects of modern mom culture (like wearing "hot mess" like a badge and one-upping each other on how little sleep we got, for example) are only contributing to our general grumpiness about motherhood. Her chapter on not being constantly offended is right on the money, and she approaches the topic while also being really self-aware of her own areas of weakness when it comes to being offended. She hit on alot of great points throughout this book, and did a good job in pointing out some of the problems in our collective attitudes about motherhood.
As I said, her voice is also really relatable, and the writing was overall fun to read. Alot of her personal stories reminded me of the days when my kids were a little younger, and also of some of my own struggles as a mom right now! This book does an excellent job of letting mothers know they are not alone in their struggles, and that I think is definitely valuable.
Negatives
This is the not-so-fun part for me. I feel like I need to preface this section with saying that to me, this book actually felt like two separate books. I felt like the underlying focus of the advice in the first 40% of the book, and the last 3 or 4 chapters was completely different than the middle. The first part and the last few chapters were mostly focused on more secular concepts with a Christian twist (by secular concepts, I mean concepts that would apply to anyone, secular or Christian, or that you could read in many psychology or self-help books), while the middle was packed with many more Bible references and a more biblical approach to the problems.
I don't know that much about the book writing/editing process, but it felt like the first part and the last part were written at the same time, and then the section in the middle was written later during a period when she grew in her faith and biblical knowledge. If I'm right, it's a great thing that her outlook grew to focus more on Scripture. For the sake of the book, it was not a great thing that the book couldn't all have been written after she decided which type of advice she wanted to focus on, because like I said, it felt like two completely different books. All that to say, some of the critiques I give below are more prominent in the first half and last few chapters.
1.The gospel is poorly presented (and even misrepresented) in this book.
I am bringing this up as someone who has made the same mistakes in my writing in the past, so I hope it can be read with that in mind.
It was clear that the author was addressing her book to an audience that are already believers in Christ. The problem is that in the current culture, you can’t assume that everyone who picks up a Christian “self-help” type book will actually be a Christian. Especially with a title like “Grumpy Mom Takes A Holiday” - all kinds of moms who struggle with grumpiness will be picking this up. As a Christian author, you have to keep this in mind. If any nonbelievers pick this book up, it will do them absolutely no eternal good if they learn how to be less grumpy at their kids, but they still don’t know what it means to be saved.
In the first few paragraphs the author assured the reader that the Holy Spirit will help her on this journey. She can make no such assurance though, because unbelievers do not have the Holy Spirit.
There are two things that need to happen to explain the gospel - you need to tell why we need to be saved, and tell how we can be saved. Unfortunately, the book missed the mark on both counts.
Just to be clear, the gospel is NOT that God will help us to be better, less grumpy people. The gospel is not about doing our best for God. The gospel is not about God helping us live our lives more abundantly. The gospel is not about self improvement. Some of those things can result from the gospel, but it’s not how we are saved.
Unfortunately alot of this book gives the impression that this is all there is to being a Christian, because the actual gospel is never explained in full, though in some of the middle chapters it is touched on.
The part where the gospel came closest to being explained was in Chapter 9 where the author mentions that until fairly recently, she was relying on works to save her, until she realized she could never do enough. But I was disappointed when the only thing she described being freed from was her “guilt” (not her sin and it’s consequences). She prays “Only you can save me from my own requirements for righteousness that I put on myself.”
The problem is not that we are guilty of not living up to our own standards. We are guilty of not living up to God's standard (Romans 3:23), and His standard is perfection, because He is perfectly holy. We have earned nothing for ourselves but eternal punishment in Hell, because we have sinned against an eternal God and broken His laws (Romans 6:23, Matthew 25:46). Even our supposed good deeds are like filthy rags to God (Isaiah 64:6). We cannot pay this sin-debt, we cannot make ourselves righteous. Which is why we need Jesus, because HE is the only one who meets God’s standard (2 Corinthians 5:21), and He took our punishment for us.
God loves us, and because He loves us, He didn’t leave us in our sins, but provided a way for us to be saved. God became a man, Jesus who was fully man and fully God. He lived the sinless life that we couldn’t, and then died in our place, paying the penalty for our sin. Then He rose again, defeating sin and death, proving He was God! And now all we must do to be saved is repent, meaning to be sorry for our sin and turn to Jesus, putting our faith in Him to save us and not in any work of our own (Ephesians 2:8-9). When we do that, He takes our sin and gives us His righteousness (2 Corinthians 5:21), so we can stand blameless before God. He also gives us the Holy Spirit, who then empowers us to live no longer for ourselves but for Christ.
I’m not saying the author doesn’t understand the gospel, I think she does because of different things she writes throughout the book. But no one could read this book and put the gospel together unless they already knew the gospel themselves. Elements of the full gospel are scattered in various phrases throughout the book, but it’s like a super-confusing Easter egg hunt, one that starts with the results of the gospel and works backward. But even the reason Jesus died for us is never explained, His resurrection never mentioned.
The whole gospel is awfully hard to find in this book amidst all these disjointed and missing puzzle pieces, and perhaps an opportunity to reach unbelieving moms who pick up this book is missed. Worse, I’m afraid that because our sin problem isn’t addressed and the gospel isn’t fully explained, some may leave with a confusion about what it really even means to be a Christian. This is so important to get right in any Christian nonfiction book, in my opinion, and the lack of a clear explanation of how to be saved was my biggest problem with the book.
2. There was more of a focus on self-help than biblical advice.
A lot of the advice in this book is repackaged self-help, with a few Bible passages sprinkled in to support her points. I thought this was a shame. The Bible actually has a ton to say about complaining, selfishness, worry, grumbling, unthankfulness...all the things that make us act like grumpy moms. This book could have been so Biblically rooted if the author had started with the Bible and worked out from there, but she often starts with her own thoughts (many of which are not that different from other self-help books) and her own experiences with Christian living, and then the biblical references felt tacked on in order to support her points.
In all fairness, this critique applies more toward the beginning and last few chapters of the book. She hit a better note in the middle.
3. The actual root cause of being a grumpy mom is not addressed.
The truth is, we are not grumpy just because we aren’t flexible enough. We’re not grumpy because we don’t take enough time for self-care, or because we rely too much on chocolate. At the root, being grumpy at our kids is really a lingering sin struggle.
We don’t like our kids interrupting whatever we’re doing because we’ve put our interests ahead of theirs (Phil. 2:4). We complain about all the work kids involve and how we never have time to brush our hair because we are viewing a gift from God as a burden, harboring ungratefulness.
These are just examples from the book, but hopefully you can see my point. These things won’t be fixed by bandaids like more flexibility and self-care. Selfishness, complaining, and ingratitude are all sins, and ones the Bible has plenty to say about, but she didn’t include any of the really relevant verses, or address them as sins at all. She didn’t explain how Jesus has freed those of us who believe in Him from the power of these sins in our lives BECAUSE He died in our place to pay the penalty for our sins. This book would have been so much more powerful and useful if she had spent more time on these things. Christians still need to be reminded of the true gospel too. I think that’s the most effective way to overcome these struggles -when we are focused on what Christ did to save us from sins like these, they automatically lose some appeal.
The author didn't use the word “sin” through most of the book, mainly using euphemisms like “mess” and “brokenness”, which I think softens the message that our main problem in grumpiness is our sinful and selfish attitudes.
4. Questionable use of Bible translations.
Warning: This is just a pet peeve of mine.
I almost hate to bring this up, because a lot of you may just tune me out here, but can we all just be a little more careful with our use of the Message? This is not an actual Bible translation, and it’s not God’s Word. It’s a paraphrase. If I paraphrase something you say, I’m not spreading your words, I’m taking what you said and putting it in my own words. A paraphrase of the Bible is man’s word, not God’s Word. There is nothing wrong with referencing it occasionally, but please, let’s not quote the Message as if it’s God’s Word. Because it’s not.
The author did okay with qualifying that it was a paraphrase at the beginning, but she used the Message heavily throughout this book and then eventually dropped the qualification.
Whether you like the Message or not (can you tell what I think about it? ha!), the Message should not be referenced or read as your main “Bible translation”. Because it’s not an actual translation.
Okay, I’m off my soapbox now.
---
To sum it up, who would I recommend this book to?
Because of the problems with presenting the gospel clearly and the confusion that might result, I would absolutely not recommend this to anyone that I was not already sure was a strong Christian who really understands the gospel.
Because of the weak beginning and end, I am hesitant to recommend the book to my Christian friends too. There are some gems in this book, but they are buried beneath too much soft or confusing language, and a hesitancy to address these issues as sin. I just think there are other similar books that are more rooted in the Bible and the gospel Respectable Sins: Confronting the Sins We Tolerate by Jerry Bridges is one).
Again, I'm sharing all this not just for people who want to know what to expect from the book, but also because I hope the author sees this. Valerie, if you are reading, please know that I tried my best to approach this review in love, as a sister in Christ. I've been praying over this review, and hope you can see my heart and give some thought to these issues.
Note: I received a digital copy of this book from NetGalley for free, in exchange for an honest review.
Before I start, I just want to say up front that I really agonized over this review for one main reason - I'm really hoping the author will read this review.
I'm hoping she will read it because I think she is actually really talented. It's no small thing to write a book, and her voice is relatable and fun. I can tell that she really has a heart for the Lord and wants to serve the Lord well, and that goes a long way in my book. She also mentions a few times in the book the value of having a teachable spirit and being able to listen to a critique. I do have some critiques to give that I think are really important. I'm hoping the author reads this because I have no doubt that she will write another book in the future, and I hope she can consider these points when she does.
First, let's talk about what she did well!
Positives
This is such a great topic for a book in today's culture. I fully agree with the author's assessment of the problems with being a grumpy mom, and how the different aspects of modern mom culture (like wearing "hot mess" like a badge and one-upping each other on how little sleep we got, for example) are only contributing to our general grumpiness about motherhood. Her chapter on not being constantly offended is right on the money, and she approaches the topic while also being really self-aware of her own areas of weakness when it comes to being offended. She hit on alot of great points throughout this book, and did a good job in pointing out some of the problems in our collective attitudes about motherhood.
As I said, her voice is also really relatable, and the writing was overall fun to read. Alot of her personal stories reminded me of the days when my kids were a little younger, and also of some of my own struggles as a mom right now! This book does an excellent job of letting mothers know they are not alone in their struggles, and that I think is definitely valuable.
Negatives
This is the not-so-fun part for me. I feel like I need to preface this section with saying that to me, this book actually felt like two separate books. I felt like the underlying focus of the advice in the first 40% of the book, and the last 3 or 4 chapters was completely different than the middle. The first part and the last few chapters were mostly focused on more secular concepts with a Christian twist (by secular concepts, I mean concepts that would apply to anyone, secular or Christian, or that you could read in many psychology or self-help books), while the middle was packed with many more Bible references and a more biblical approach to the problems.
I don't know that much about the book writing/editing process, but it felt like the first part and the last part were written at the same time, and then the section in the middle was written later during a period when she grew in her faith and biblical knowledge. If I'm right, it's a great thing that her outlook grew to focus more on Scripture. For the sake of the book, it was not a great thing that the book couldn't all have been written after she decided which type of advice she wanted to focus on, because like I said, it felt like two completely different books. All that to say, some of the critiques I give below are more prominent in the first half and last few chapters.
1.The gospel is poorly presented (and even misrepresented) in this book.
I am bringing this up as someone who has made the same mistakes in my writing in the past, so I hope it can be read with that in mind.
It was clear that the author was addressing her book to an audience that are already believers in Christ. The problem is that in the current culture, you can’t assume that everyone who picks up a Christian “self-help” type book will actually be a Christian. Especially with a title like “Grumpy Mom Takes A Holiday” - all kinds of moms who struggle with grumpiness will be picking this up. As a Christian author, you have to keep this in mind. If any nonbelievers pick this book up, it will do them absolutely no eternal good if they learn how to be less grumpy at their kids, but they still don’t know what it means to be saved.
In the first few paragraphs the author assured the reader that the Holy Spirit will help her on this journey. She can make no such assurance though, because unbelievers do not have the Holy Spirit.
There are two things that need to happen to explain the gospel - you need to tell why we need to be saved, and tell how we can be saved. Unfortunately, the book missed the mark on both counts.
Just to be clear, the gospel is NOT that God will help us to be better, less grumpy people. The gospel is not about doing our best for God. The gospel is not about God helping us live our lives more abundantly. The gospel is not about self improvement. Some of those things can result from the gospel, but it’s not how we are saved.
Unfortunately alot of this book gives the impression that this is all there is to being a Christian, because the actual gospel is never explained in full, though in some of the middle chapters it is touched on.
The part where the gospel came closest to being explained was in Chapter 9 where the author mentions that until fairly recently, she was relying on works to save her, until she realized she could never do enough. But I was disappointed when the only thing she described being freed from was her “guilt” (not her sin and it’s consequences). She prays “Only you can save me from my own requirements for righteousness that I put on myself.”
The problem is not that we are guilty of not living up to our own standards. We are guilty of not living up to God's standard (Romans 3:23), and His standard is perfection, because He is perfectly holy. We have earned nothing for ourselves but eternal punishment in Hell, because we have sinned against an eternal God and broken His laws (Romans 6:23, Matthew 25:46). Even our supposed good deeds are like filthy rags to God (Isaiah 64:6). We cannot pay this sin-debt, we cannot make ourselves righteous. Which is why we need Jesus, because HE is the only one who meets God’s standard (2 Corinthians 5:21), and He took our punishment for us.
God loves us, and because He loves us, He didn’t leave us in our sins, but provided a way for us to be saved. God became a man, Jesus who was fully man and fully God. He lived the sinless life that we couldn’t, and then died in our place, paying the penalty for our sin. Then He rose again, defeating sin and death, proving He was God! And now all we must do to be saved is repent, meaning to be sorry for our sin and turn to Jesus, putting our faith in Him to save us and not in any work of our own (Ephesians 2:8-9). When we do that, He takes our sin and gives us His righteousness (2 Corinthians 5:21), so we can stand blameless before God. He also gives us the Holy Spirit, who then empowers us to live no longer for ourselves but for Christ.
I’m not saying the author doesn’t understand the gospel, I think she does because of different things she writes throughout the book. But no one could read this book and put the gospel together unless they already knew the gospel themselves. Elements of the full gospel are scattered in various phrases throughout the book, but it’s like a super-confusing Easter egg hunt, one that starts with the results of the gospel and works backward. But even the reason Jesus died for us is never explained, His resurrection never mentioned.
The whole gospel is awfully hard to find in this book amidst all these disjointed and missing puzzle pieces, and perhaps an opportunity to reach unbelieving moms who pick up this book is missed. Worse, I’m afraid that because our sin problem isn’t addressed and the gospel isn’t fully explained, some may leave with a confusion about what it really even means to be a Christian. This is so important to get right in any Christian nonfiction book, in my opinion, and the lack of a clear explanation of how to be saved was my biggest problem with the book.
2. There was more of a focus on self-help than biblical advice.
A lot of the advice in this book is repackaged self-help, with a few Bible passages sprinkled in to support her points. I thought this was a shame. The Bible actually has a ton to say about complaining, selfishness, worry, grumbling, unthankfulness...all the things that make us act like grumpy moms. This book could have been so Biblically rooted if the author had started with the Bible and worked out from there, but she often starts with her own thoughts (many of which are not that different from other self-help books) and her own experiences with Christian living, and then the biblical references felt tacked on in order to support her points.
In all fairness, this critique applies more toward the beginning and last few chapters of the book. She hit a better note in the middle.
3. The actual root cause of being a grumpy mom is not addressed.
The truth is, we are not grumpy just because we aren’t flexible enough. We’re not grumpy because we don’t take enough time for self-care, or because we rely too much on chocolate. At the root, being grumpy at our kids is really a lingering sin struggle.
We don’t like our kids interrupting whatever we’re doing because we’ve put our interests ahead of theirs (Phil. 2:4). We complain about all the work kids involve and how we never have time to brush our hair because we are viewing a gift from God as a burden, harboring ungratefulness.
These are just examples from the book, but hopefully you can see my point. These things won’t be fixed by bandaids like more flexibility and self-care. Selfishness, complaining, and ingratitude are all sins, and ones the Bible has plenty to say about, but she didn’t include any of the really relevant verses, or address them as sins at all. She didn’t explain how Jesus has freed those of us who believe in Him from the power of these sins in our lives BECAUSE He died in our place to pay the penalty for our sins. This book would have been so much more powerful and useful if she had spent more time on these things. Christians still need to be reminded of the true gospel too. I think that’s the most effective way to overcome these struggles -when we are focused on what Christ did to save us from sins like these, they automatically lose some appeal.
The author didn't use the word “sin” through most of the book, mainly using euphemisms like “mess” and “brokenness”, which I think softens the message that our main problem in grumpiness is our sinful and selfish attitudes.
4. Questionable use of Bible translations.
Warning: This is just a pet peeve of mine.
I almost hate to bring this up, because a lot of you may just tune me out here, but can we all just be a little more careful with our use of the Message? This is not an actual Bible translation, and it’s not God’s Word. It’s a paraphrase. If I paraphrase something you say, I’m not spreading your words, I’m taking what you said and putting it in my own words. A paraphrase of the Bible is man’s word, not God’s Word. There is nothing wrong with referencing it occasionally, but please, let’s not quote the Message as if it’s God’s Word. Because it’s not.
The author did okay with qualifying that it was a paraphrase at the beginning, but she used the Message heavily throughout this book and then eventually dropped the qualification.
Whether you like the Message or not (can you tell what I think about it? ha!), the Message should not be referenced or read as your main “Bible translation”. Because it’s not an actual translation.
Okay, I’m off my soapbox now.
---
To sum it up, who would I recommend this book to?
Because of the problems with presenting the gospel clearly and the confusion that might result, I would absolutely not recommend this to anyone that I was not already sure was a strong Christian who really understands the gospel.
Because of the weak beginning and end, I am hesitant to recommend the book to my Christian friends too. There are some gems in this book, but they are buried beneath too much soft or confusing language, and a hesitancy to address these issues as sin. I just think there are other similar books that are more rooted in the Bible and the gospel Respectable Sins: Confronting the Sins We Tolerate by Jerry Bridges is one).
Again, I'm sharing all this not just for people who want to know what to expect from the book, but also because I hope the author sees this. Valerie, if you are reading, please know that I tried my best to approach this review in love, as a sister in Christ. I've been praying over this review, and hope you can see my heart and give some thought to these issues.
Note: I received a digital copy of this book from NetGalley for free, in exchange for an honest review.
May 9, 2021
I loved the premise of this book: how to trade the world's selfish, gloomy view of motherhood for the joyful perspective of God. I also related to many of Woerner's examples (as a work-at-home mom myself). The first part was especially powerful (particularly her chapters on sleep, flexibility, and coping mechanisms!). I'm still reflecting on some of the profoundly wise things she shared. That said, this book lacked a strong, clear gospel foundation and steered a bit self-help-ish at times. I also wasn't a big fan of how much Woerner relied on the Message (and used it as a "translation," which I'm uncomfortable calling it). Finally, there were a few theological concepts I wish she was clearer on (e.g., the distinction between godly grief / repentance over sin and the futility of mommy guilt). All in all, though, I did enjoy it and would recommend it to a strong believer.
April 9, 2019
This book was so refreshing to read! From cover to cover it is packed with relatable stories, practical advice, and honest truths all moms need to hear. No matter what age your kids are you will find a friend and mentor in Grumpy Mom. My favorite parts of this book are the action steps and prayers at the end of each chapter. Mom life is hard, it is even harder without help! This book is a tool that no mom should be without.
April 12, 2025
My only beef with this book was the amount of times she used the word “mama”
February 27, 2025
I loved this book! Even if she’s not your personality clone (she’s basically me, she just lives in the South), you’ll find this book chock full of encouragement & conviction for your spiritual life & motherhood, & how the two aren’t separate.
September 15, 2019
I am not a mother so one might wonder why I am reading this book. There are two reasons:
1 - I like reading things before I need them. I read marriage books and I'm not married so why not read a book about motherhood?
2 - Phylicia Masonheimer talked about this book and how amazing it was and I thought, "I should read this so that I know if I can feel good about recommending it to moms".
I assumed I would like it. Phylicia has a good track record of recommendations. However, my recommendation reflects me. If someone is doing something because I say it would be good, I want to have experienced for myself. So, I read the book and it was FANTASTIC!!!
Valerie has a purpose for this book - to reframe motherhood and combat the cultural stereotype. She believes that kids don't have to ruin your life. You can sleep, shower, enjoy life, work, spend time with friends, etc. She advocates prioritizing your marriage, incorporating your kids into your daily life, and taking time for yourself without guilt.
If I had to summarize this book, it would be that you cannot be a good mom to your kids if you make them the center of your world. Grumpy Mom comes because you think your kids are the center of your world, but you don't want them to be, so they become inconveniences to you. Your relationship with God, with your husband, with friends, time for yourself - these things are important and when they are cared for and nourished, you are able to be a better mom for your kids.
Reader or not, I hope every mom picks up this book. It might take you a long time and you might only be able to read in five-minute increments, but this book will encourage you. Valerie is open and honest. She admits to her own struggles with perfectionism and mom-guilt. As I've already said, I'm not a mom but I found so much to be relatable and helpful in this book! There are things I can work on now in preparation for being a mom one day.
Each chapter ends with some action steps. It might be to simply stop and be thankful or it might be a little bit more involved. There is also a heartfelt prayer. These prayers include confession, thanksgiving, and asking for His help. I loved them!
I thought it was fun that she quoted and referenced so many books and people I've read and follow. I've got to read Emotionally Healthy Spirituality! When she's talking about slowing down and being present, she references Shauna Neiquist's Present Over Perfect. I'll just put in my two cents - if you want a book about being present (this one has plenty on it but still), read Lysa TerKeurst's The Best Yes. They are on the same topic but Lysa's doesn't have some questionable theology. That's obviously my opinion, but if you are someone to whom orthodox theology is important, then you might prefer TerKeurst.
The only other thing that bothered me was when she brought up Genesis 3 and the curses. We talked about this today in Sunday School and what I had been taught my whole life was that Adam and Eve were cursed. Go read Genesis 3. See what it says are cursed. Then listen to this podcast episode: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast...
Very eye-opening to me. Just something that is not taught and has been accidentally twisted. I just like to share this when and where I can.
I think this would be a great gift to expecting moms or even experienced moms who you think might really need this message. Sometimes we can want to change but not know how or where to start. Valerie will help you start.
1 - I like reading things before I need them. I read marriage books and I'm not married so why not read a book about motherhood?
2 - Phylicia Masonheimer talked about this book and how amazing it was and I thought, "I should read this so that I know if I can feel good about recommending it to moms".
I assumed I would like it. Phylicia has a good track record of recommendations. However, my recommendation reflects me. If someone is doing something because I say it would be good, I want to have experienced for myself. So, I read the book and it was FANTASTIC!!!
Valerie has a purpose for this book - to reframe motherhood and combat the cultural stereotype. She believes that kids don't have to ruin your life. You can sleep, shower, enjoy life, work, spend time with friends, etc. She advocates prioritizing your marriage, incorporating your kids into your daily life, and taking time for yourself without guilt.
If I had to summarize this book, it would be that you cannot be a good mom to your kids if you make them the center of your world. Grumpy Mom comes because you think your kids are the center of your world, but you don't want them to be, so they become inconveniences to you. Your relationship with God, with your husband, with friends, time for yourself - these things are important and when they are cared for and nourished, you are able to be a better mom for your kids.
Reader or not, I hope every mom picks up this book. It might take you a long time and you might only be able to read in five-minute increments, but this book will encourage you. Valerie is open and honest. She admits to her own struggles with perfectionism and mom-guilt. As I've already said, I'm not a mom but I found so much to be relatable and helpful in this book! There are things I can work on now in preparation for being a mom one day.
Each chapter ends with some action steps. It might be to simply stop and be thankful or it might be a little bit more involved. There is also a heartfelt prayer. These prayers include confession, thanksgiving, and asking for His help. I loved them!
I thought it was fun that she quoted and referenced so many books and people I've read and follow. I've got to read Emotionally Healthy Spirituality! When she's talking about slowing down and being present, she references Shauna Neiquist's Present Over Perfect. I'll just put in my two cents - if you want a book about being present (this one has plenty on it but still), read Lysa TerKeurst's The Best Yes. They are on the same topic but Lysa's doesn't have some questionable theology. That's obviously my opinion, but if you are someone to whom orthodox theology is important, then you might prefer TerKeurst.
The only other thing that bothered me was when she brought up Genesis 3 and the curses. We talked about this today in Sunday School and what I had been taught my whole life was that Adam and Eve were cursed. Go read Genesis 3. See what it says are cursed. Then listen to this podcast episode: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast...
Very eye-opening to me. Just something that is not taught and has been accidentally twisted. I just like to share this when and where I can.
I think this would be a great gift to expecting moms or even experienced moms who you think might really need this message. Sometimes we can want to change but not know how or where to start. Valerie will help you start.
July 13, 2021
Title info that may affect decisions to purchase: From the title, the back of the book, and even the online quiz I took that convinced me I wanted the book, I truly believed this book would be more about dealing with our negative emotions while parenting. Instead, it is general parenting advice (like still pursuing friendships, slowing down, prioritizing your marriage, not complaining). It is good general parenting advice, and one chapter early on does deal with how to "talk to" our emotions. But I really thought this book would target its help more specifically toward moms in the midst of grumpy days. (I understand that the book's premise is that all these general parenting tips will help you not be grumpy. But still.)
Another factor that may affect decisions to buy is that the mom writing it is very young. Her daughters are four and two at the time the book is written. Her love for Jesus is evident, and she's very honest about being in the trenches herself, but if you're my age looking for a Titus 2 older woman--this won't be it!
It's helpful, mommy-blog type advice: little boosts of encouragement from her experience. It can be cutesy, like calling her readers "ya'll," but it's nowhere near as cutesy, "aren't-I-relatable" as Lysa TerKeurst. It has more content than cute stories, if that makes sense.
It's also a pretty book, quite possibly one of the most pleasant books to hold and look at that I own. I would just stare at those watercolor sunglasses on the cover.
I do not like using The Message as a proof text and I never will. Sometimes I would look the same verse up in the ESV and it would mean something COMPLETELY different. That's dangerous territory; Scripture speaks well enough to these things without us having to get all wacky with translations.
Another factor that may affect decisions to buy is that the mom writing it is very young. Her daughters are four and two at the time the book is written. Her love for Jesus is evident, and she's very honest about being in the trenches herself, but if you're my age looking for a Titus 2 older woman--this won't be it!
It's helpful, mommy-blog type advice: little boosts of encouragement from her experience. It can be cutesy, like calling her readers "ya'll," but it's nowhere near as cutesy, "aren't-I-relatable" as Lysa TerKeurst. It has more content than cute stories, if that makes sense.
It's also a pretty book, quite possibly one of the most pleasant books to hold and look at that I own. I would just stare at those watercolor sunglasses on the cover.
I do not like using The Message as a proof text and I never will. Sometimes I would look the same verse up in the ESV and it would mean something COMPLETELY different. That's dangerous territory; Scripture speaks well enough to these things without us having to get all wacky with translations.
April 12, 2019
What a sweet read for moms - especially those in the little years! After long days of caring for two I loved soaking in Valerie's refreshing words about fighting the good fight of motherhood with joy and for God's glory. With each chapter I couldn't help but think "this girl gets it" - the struggles, the fears, the strains, the sins that we bear as weary mommas. She keeps it real and lighthearted, and yet manages to untangle the deeper, raw issues of the heart that must be addressed in order for us to shake "grumpiness" and walk by the Spirit. Each reading gave a pep talk I didn't know I needed.
The combination of chuckle-worthy personal anecdotes, strong exhortations from Scripture, and practical steps for growth makes it both enjoyable and super edifying. It reoriented my daily perspective in small but impactful ways. I can't wait to share this gem with other moms!
*I received an advanced reader copy through NetGalley. The opinions expressed are my own.
The combination of chuckle-worthy personal anecdotes, strong exhortations from Scripture, and practical steps for growth makes it both enjoyable and super edifying. It reoriented my daily perspective in small but impactful ways. I can't wait to share this gem with other moms!
*I received an advanced reader copy through NetGalley. The opinions expressed are my own.
July 1, 2019
4.5 stars. I loved just about everything except her frequent use of The Message, a Bible translation I do NOT trust or condone. I love how practical this book was. Telling moms to find their strength in God and to be more present and all that sounds good, but sometimes I need a step by step plan to help me get there, and that’s just what she delivered. Not everything felt applicable to me, but there is so much wisdom and practical advice.
May 11, 2020
Waffling between three and four stars. A good premise and for the most part the content matches it. I think some chapters strayed from more Biblically based ideas into personal preference with some Bible verses to support the ideas (the chapters on minimalism and slowing down, for example). What really brought it down for me, however, was the influencer writing style: self-deprecation in order to sound relatable, trivial examples of flaws in order to sound authentic (to be fair, there are also plenty of examples of deep flaws as well, which come across as much more honest and heartfelt), and the constant use of “y’all.” You’re from Louisiana. We get it. *eye roll* Am I the only reader who finds this dumbing down of content insulting? I think moms are capable of much more. Call out the root cause of Grumpy Mom, selfish sin, and trust that you don’t need to emphasize it with a “This is huge, y’all!”
This isn’t the only book out there with these ideas about Biblical motherhood, but it is a good choice for that genre. Not, in my opinion, the best choice, but still good. One strength I really appreciated was the action steps at the end of each chapter. Many were extremely practical and useful for actually implementing the ideas of the chapter. I also really appreciated that the main theme of the book was that we can’t do life, not just motherhood, without Jesus and that came across strongly!
P.S. Personal preference: I wish there were more Bible verses from actual translations of the Bible rather than mostly from The Message paraphrase.
This isn’t the only book out there with these ideas about Biblical motherhood, but it is a good choice for that genre. Not, in my opinion, the best choice, but still good. One strength I really appreciated was the action steps at the end of each chapter. Many were extremely practical and useful for actually implementing the ideas of the chapter. I also really appreciated that the main theme of the book was that we can’t do life, not just motherhood, without Jesus and that came across strongly!
P.S. Personal preference: I wish there were more Bible verses from actual translations of the Bible rather than mostly from The Message paraphrase.
June 29, 2025
I really enjoyed this book! I think it’s got a lot of great nuggets of wisdom. The only thing I could really say against it, which isn’t entirely its own fault, is that at this point I’ve read a lot of books on motherhood and godly parenting, and many of the chapters in this book touched on topics I had already read about more in-depth in other books that went a little bit deeper. So in someways, I guess you could say that this book felt a touch “mile wide and an inch deep” but I think if you’re looking for an overall refresh on how to add joy to your life as a mother, this book is a simple and great place to start.
March 15, 2024
This book hit the nail on the head with some of the emotions and experiences I have as a mom and I feel equally humbled and encouraged by the wisdom I read. I loved that the author approached these complicated areas of motherhood from a Christian-focused perspective and always brought it back to Jesus. I will definitely be re-reading some of the more relevant chapters and I've already been able to shift my mindset in some ways and I am grateful for that.
March 25, 2019
This book is a must read for mommas everywhere. No matter where you are in the trenches, this book can and will change your motherhood. We don’t have to follow the lies that the world feeds us, when we have the Truth and the Lord by our side. We can’t do this mothering thing alone and while this book was convicting in many ways, it was also so encouraging and uplifting. I impair every mom to pick this book up and I dare you to not let it change your motherhood for the better. I’ve felt more joy and peace and experienced much more laughter and freedom. Read up, mommas. This is the book we’ve been waiting for!
September 26, 2023
This was a 5 star for me, maybe just right book, right time but wow! One of my favorite books on motherhood to date, filled with biblical and so much practical advice! Found myself thinking about it throughout the day many times.
February 24, 2023
Valerie did a really lovely job of explaining why we often allow grumpy mom to visit and take over our houses. She touched on so many things the Lord has been teaching me recently, and I loved it!
April 11, 2022
This book was incredible. Despite it taking me 6 weeks to get through, it was extremely easy to read. If life would have allowed, I would have read from start to finish in one sitting. I think Woerner is the same person as me... either that or she wrote this book specifically for me and knew all the areas in my life that need work. Every chapter was so applicable to the stage of motherhood I am in right now (4 kids in 5.5 years). My favourite chapter may be Chapter 7 about Energy Drainers and Energy Sources. I also loved Chapter 13 on "Quiet" Time and Chapter 16 on Being Offended. Who am I kidding, every single chapter hit the nail on the head. I love how honest Woerner is and how she is not afraid to talk about many of the "acceptable sins" we seem to rationalize in our lives. I have already started to implement some of the suggestions of this book in my life and by God's grace am noticing change for the better. My one and only criticism is the use of the Message translation for some of the Bible verses she uses. I am not super familiar with this translation but I am not sure how accurate the translating is. She does use NIV and ESV as well. Not sure as to why the variety.
April 2, 2019
This little book is intriguing - and while it's directed towards mamas of youngsters... the principles discussed are pertinent and encouraging to all of use regardless of the age of our kids. Valerie Woerner has an easy-to-read writing style that flows through many topics from not letting our emotions rule our lives to developing areas in our lives that are not necessarily a part of our roles as mothers... to connecting with others... A favorite chapter was 'Plays well with Others' since this is a favorite phrase for us as we send each other out on outings with our adult friends. But as I look around the world I see that there are many people [adults] who really don't know how to play well with others. So I love that she breaks it down a bit - Don't Gossip - Don't Compare - Don't Judge - Lift Each Other Up - Speak Truth in Love - etc. Each chapter ends with action steps that challenges us to put the principles into action. Pick up a copy of this book and let these concepts start a change in you too!
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October 17, 2019Featured Nonfiction Grumpy Mom Takes a Holiday by Valerie Woerner
Some days motherhood can be about piles. Piles of dirty laundry, unwashed dishes, broken toys, and shoes directly in front of the door. It's enough to make even the toughest women grumpy.
In Grumpy Mom Takes a Holiday, Valerie Woerner shares her personal journey of motherhood, guided by her Christian faith, and how she brought joy back into the process. A quick, entertaining, and practical read, this book is a good one to read before a busy holiday season.
For those wanting to read more about parenting, check out these titles or look for the PARENTS section at your local Scott County Library branch:
The Danish way of parenting: what the happiest people in the world know about raising confident, capable kids
by Jessica Alexander
Parenting isn't for cowards : dealing confidently with the frustrations of child-rearing by James Dobson
How Eskimos keep their babies warm :and other adventures in parenting (from Argentina to Tanzania and everywhere in between) by Mei Ling Hopgood
Some days motherhood can be about piles. Piles of dirty laundry, unwashed dishes, broken toys, and shoes directly in front of the door. It's enough to make even the toughest women grumpy.
In Grumpy Mom Takes a Holiday, Valerie Woerner shares her personal journey of motherhood, guided by her Christian faith, and how she brought joy back into the process. A quick, entertaining, and practical read, this book is a good one to read before a busy holiday season.
For those wanting to read more about parenting, check out these titles or look for the PARENTS section at your local Scott County Library branch:
The Danish way of parenting: what the happiest people in the world know about raising confident, capable kids
by Jessica Alexander
Parenting isn't for cowards : dealing confidently with the frustrations of child-rearing by James Dobson
How Eskimos keep their babies warm :and other adventures in parenting (from Argentina to Tanzania and everywhere in between) by Mei Ling Hopgood
July 7, 2025
I found this book encouraging and convicting. It brought me to tears at times. It does not deserve the excessively long 2 star review it was given here on Goodreads. Sure, the MSG was quoted a few times, which I don’t prefer, but it was a really helpful book. The “practical” advice at the end of each chapter was not some wishy-washy “self-help”… they were actually helpful, eye-opening action steps that one can prayerfully consider. And lastly, it’s ridiculous to be so critical that a book which was intended for believers doesn’t go into depth about the ABC’s of the gospel. That’s not fair. Great book.
March 14, 2021
A really helpful, relatable and encouraging book on motherhood. The author is refreshingly honest, she challenges underlying assumptions that we live out without even thinking about them, and wonderfully she suggests an alternative way forward. Thankfully perfection is not the goal, but there can be change and growth with God's help. Given five stars because I'm already seeing some of the principles impacting my life and motherhood for the better. Well worth reading; I can see myself re-reading it in the future!
April 9, 2019
I’ve been reading this book over the last 6 weeks, and finished it last week. I can’t pinpoint exactly what it was in the book, but I’m just not as grumpy as I was before. I have more patience and grace with my kids. I enjoy them more. I can recognize when my expectations are unrealistic and adjust them accordingly. I’ve also been a part of a group of moms reading it together, and it is just so encouraging to read it together, to hear other people experiencing change and encouraging one another. Get this book and invite your friends to read with you! It will change your motherhood.
November 11, 2023
This is one of the best books I’ve read in awhile! It felt like Val’s writing spoke DIRECTLY to my own struggles in parenting motherhood & marriage. She is honest & encouraging - all backed up with biblical principles and scripture texts. When I finished the book I went right back to the beginning and started over - now I’m almost through the 2nd time! There was so much to learn and be corrected on. I would REALLY recommend this for every Christian mom to read!
January 8, 2024
I cannot recommend this book enough!! It's one of the best books I've read on motherhood. I love how relatable Val is - her vulnerability and wisdom was good for my heart! So much truth packed into these pages 🫶🏼
Don't be deterred by the title (like I was) - pick it up and read it ASAP!!
Don't be deterred by the title (like I was) - pick it up and read it ASAP!!
October 24, 2025
Such a great book! Loved all the scripture and spiritual truths she included. A lot of simple thoughts and strategies that point to Jesus to help change my attitude toward motherhood and parenting especially on the hard days!
April 3, 2019
This book is a must read for every Mom. I was lucky to receive an ARC of this book and have written down so many quotes and phrases from this book to read over and over again! Run and get this book. You won’t regret it
May 27, 2019
This book spoke to my heart! This will be a book that I will read over and over again. I think that this is a great book for all moms in any season to have on their shelves.
September 23, 2019
This was such a good reminder to find joy in motherhood and some of the lies that are keeping us from being happy and enjoying our kids. Loved it!
January 22, 2020
I feel like this book was written directly to me. It’s encouraging, insightful, and offers practical steps to work on your “Grumpy Mom” habits.
June 6, 2021
Really a 2.5, but I rounded up.
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