Failing Up: A Professor's Odyssey of Flunking, Determination, and Hope

by Barbara Hong

Failing UP was recognized as one of only 2% of books reviewed to earn a Kirkus STAR—the most prestigious designation in the book industry in awarding books of exceptional merit. When people first meet Barbara Hong, they often conclude that her life must have always been enriched. They assume she had loving, successful parents and all the support she needed to reach her goals. Nothing could be further from the truth. Hong’s path to an Ivy League university and beyond started in a filthy tenement in Singapore where she lived with an abusive father and an illiterate mother. Even as a child of six, she worked in her sweatshop home to help with extra money, which her father often wasted on alcohol. As she endured his drinking and abuse, she feared that the pain she internalized could shatter her. But instead of falling apart, Hong managed to escape her misery, thanks to a teacher who believed in her. Once she knew she wasn’t the brainless “cabbage head” her mother called her, she began excelling as a student, eventually finding the courage to leave her home and discover her true calling as a knowledge seeker, educator, and an advocate. Hong’s inspirational journey from a sweatshop home upbringing to an influential dean and professor movingly illustrates the true strength of the human spirit and the power of teachers. To Read the Kirkus Review,

284 pages, Paperback

Published April 12, 2018

About the author

Barbara Hong received her doctorate from Columbia University in Special Education in addition to three master’s degrees in Instructional Practices, Policy & Leadership, and as a Learning Specialist from the same institution. She was a three-time recipient of the prestigious Senior Fulbright Scholar award.

Hong has been a professor for more than sixteen years at the time of this publication and has taught in New York, Texas, Pennsylvania, Virginia, and Hawaii. In 2014, Hong was appointed by the US State Department, Bureau of International and Information Programs, as a Speaker Specialist and Expert on Disability where she consults with governmental agencies around the globe.

Hong's research examines the cognitive science of teaching and learning, particularly for students with disabilities, and the development of self-determination through the ethics of caring. Thus far, Hong's research has been cited in the Handbook of Adult Learning, Wiley Library of Higher Education, Vanderbilt University’s Peabody Recommended Readings, British Library, and the Hong Kong Institute of Education Library.

Hong is a recipient of the national Teacher-of-Honor award by the international honor society in education and her University Exemplary Faculty Award. She serves on the Advisory Council for Oxford Education Research Symposium, Board of Directors for the Council for Exceptional Children, President of BYU-Hawaii Honor Society, and is the Founder of PACE™—Parents As Advocates for Change in Education. She is a licensed special educator, school principal, and district administrator. Currently, Hong is a Professor and Program Coordinator of Special Education at Brigham Young University-Hawaii.

For more information, visit barbarahong.com or email contact@barbarahong.com.

To read Kirkus Review, visit: https://www.kirkusreviews.com/search/...

Reviews

[Mafe Bañgal · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book speaks to my heart in many ways, but I would like to focus on the fact that our upbringing is somehow the same. My dad was an abusive husband to my dear mother and the rest is history. There were a lot of my childhood years that I do not even want to remember. Dr. Hong's story is truly an inspiration to many people. I love the fact that she wrote this book to share her story and inspire many others. It is not everyday that you find a book whose author invested so much of her heart and soul through her experiences. This book is a book of hope and breaking the stigma of judging an individual base on his/her upbringing. Dr. Hong and her story is a living proof that failing does not always mean going down. Love this book!!

[Khaylen Abraham · Rating 5 out of 5]

A good, easy read. I have never been much of a reader myself because it’s hard for me to find books that I enjoy reading. Although, I really enjoyed reading this. It is very inspiring and amazes me that Dr. Hong was able to get to where she is now. Reading this book was able to teach me that you can do anything you set your mind to. Cliche, but true. Just reading about the trials she faced was so interesting to read and the fact that she was able to overcome those and be the person she is today, is amazing. Definitely would recommend this to anyone.

[Gabriel · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book gives a great description of the life of Dr. Barbara Hong, giving insights of the hard times as well as the hard times that Dr. Hong experienced on her path to where she is now. Having experienced poverty and abuse and most of all failure provided her with the ability to understand other students that are struggling with similar things in their lives. She has used this as a motivation for her to help those in need specifically through special education advocacy. This book is a great read for both teachers and parents everywhere. This book helped me to realize everything that I have, and made me want to spend more time advocating for those that go without. The book focuses greatly on how people didn't expect much of Dr. Hong throughout her childhood, and for a while there she did struggle, but after many failures she was able to turn things around through hard work and determination. It goes to show that we shouldn't judge others, or underestimate them in such a crippling manner, and when others don't think much of us we should work all the harder for it. It was a great read, and I would recommend it to anyone teaching or raising young ones.

[Lauren · Rating 5 out of 5]

Failing Up started out as one of the saddest books I have ever read. It details the struggles of a young girl in an extremely poor family in Singapore. Her father struggles to keep a reliable source of income and spends the majority of his money on alcohol. This addiction leads him to abuse the rest of the family. This book wouldn’t have been nearly as sad if it wasn’t a true story. Barbara struggles through school, and never truly learns how to study. However, her life turns around when she repeats a year of school; this time she has a teacher who believes in her and a wonderful friend willing to study with her. The second half of the story is about Barbara discovering who she is and obtaining her goals. It was incredibly inspiring, and motivated me to work harder in my own life to become the person I want to be. I would highly recommend this book; the first part is hard to read, but that makes the second half all the more joyful.

[Madison]

A truly inspiring book. I love how strong Doctor Hong has become and how she decided to share her story. I was taken back when I first started reading, I didn't realize how much I stereotyped Asian countries and families until I started reading her story. Doctor Hong's story made me realize that as an educator its so important to look beyond just the classroom. Looking into what our students need most and how we can help them succeed is what is most important. We need to understand that our students will struggle and we should bring them up rather than tearing them down. Doctor Hong has overcome much and continues to persevere. She is an amazing teacher, advocate, and person. I am so grateful to have read her story and gotten to learn why we should be more caring teachers and people.

[Kate McLaws · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is an amazing example of overcoming challenges and building upon your past mistakes in order to rise to your ultimate potential. Despite all odds, the author is able to keep pushing the limit of what people “think” she is capable of and sets an amazing contrast to those people who give at the slightest problem. It helps us see that despite all odds, with faith, patience, and hard work, it is possible to see past people’s weaknesses, even your own, and find the strength within.
One of my favorite ideas represented in the book is that of the importance of empathetic teaching. We are given an example of this on page 225 when the author states, “On the first day of class I let my students know that no question is ever too shallow, too stupid, or too redundant. If one student does not understand, it will be worth the time to explain until the whole class gets it.” This teaching style allows student development and stands in contrast to the more rigorous, structured format used by many other teachers in Singapore. Throughout the book, when this empathetic style of teaching is used, we are able to see the positive effect it has on the students, encouraging them to learn on their own, and through this, further their education, and better their lives. Through Hong’s specific examples, we are able to understand how teachers who worked this way, setting time aside to cater to specific needs, made a difference in her life and helped her understand that trust is the most important part of building a teaching relationship. I have been able to recommend this book to friends and family and can’t wait to see how it changes their perspective of teaching.

[Brie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Failing Up is captivating, motivational, and inspirational. The memoir-style writing evokes tremendous pathos and makes for a quick read. One thing that I loved about this book is that it is filled with life lessons, not only for educators, but for all career fields. The biggest one that I will takeaway is that success has little to do with the circumstances of our lives and everything to do with our focus. Dr. Hong tells of her poor upbringing and low-quality education, both of which are circumstances that most would equate with failure and low-brow lifestyles. Yet, in spite of these circumstances, she focused on her studies, focused on working hard, focused on overcoming the ill-perceptions that others had of her, and because of these things, she was able to find success! Her story is truly one that proves that you are stronger than your circumstances, and you can find success and fulfillment regardless of the hand that Life has dealt you. Another thing that I loved are all the quotes that Dr. Hong includes at the beginning of every chapter. If you are looking for inspirational or motivational quotes, turn to this book. It's better than Pinterest! My favorite quote is “Don’t sell yourself short. You will meet people along the way who will be lining up to place limits on you. You don’t need to beat them to the punch.” In other words, don't allow the limitations that people place on your circumstances be the limitations that you believe and set on yourself. Dr. Hong's life is a prime example of this. Definitely a book that I highly encourage others to read, and one that I will read again!

[Trey Fullmer · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book really is a phenomenal read! If you're looking for a book of overcoming trials and obstacles in your life and coming out on top this is a great book. Failing up is an easy read for myself I am not the biggest reader, but this kept me wanting to know more, and find out more about Doctor Hong. I recommend this book to anyone my wife has read this now as well and said "Wow I feel like I know Doctor Hong, and I haven't even met her". Great read again and I know that anyone that reads Failing Up will have a positive outcome from it and will shed light to yourself that you didn't know you needed.

[Macy Coester · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was empowering, inspiring, and captivating! One of my favorite parts of this book was how real everything was. It all felt very genuine and Dr. Hong just told things how they are. I was actually brought to tears at a few points while reading this book. There was no hiding things or pretending like certain parts of life didn't happen. I think the authenticity is really what spoke to me most. She embraces all of the parts of her life and talks about how each one made her into the person that she is today. I also loved how her success didn't seem to be magical or like something that just happened overnight. She tells how she failed year after year and how hard she worked only to still perform poorly. Even though she moved to America and accomplished so much there, she never forgets about her roots in Singapore. She knows where she came from and she feels bad for leaving it and her family. She truly made her life into what she wanted it to be after coming from very little. No one ever expected her to amount to anything, but now, no one expects her to have been where she has been. One of the most successful and determined people, that started out with so little, teaches how important hard work is, and just how far one can get in life if they really set their mind to something and make it happen.

[Ryan · Rating 5 out of 5]

I am very grateful to have this opportunity to read this wonderful book, and I am very grateful for the growth experience Dr.Hong shared. It inspired me a lot. With her faith and perseverance, Dr. Hong finally becomes very successful. Dr. Hong is an example for each of us. She is not only full of faith in her life, but she is also willing to help everyone around her who needs help. This book teaches the importance of turning failure into motivation for success and describes her strength to overcome different challenges. Dr.Hong's book tells me that everyone has the ability to pursue success, as long as we are willing to work hard and willing to spend time. Everything can be seen hope. She is an example of wisdom, kindness, and success. I will recommend this book to my friends because I like it. It can accompany me to keep moving forward.

[Rachel Vanisi · Rating 5 out of 5]

It is amazing how someone life can change over time. As I started reading the book I start to relate myself to what she shared. I also remember one time in class she shared how we should never compare ourselves to anyone. As I read through the book I did not want it to end. I want it to keep going. It was amazing to see how she overcome many challenges and become very successful. Even though she was being called a cabbage head she did make it to far and has touched many lives including mine. This is a good book that I believed that will not only benefit students but it will benefit parents meaning it will benefit everyone. I would suggest reading it and it is a fast read book.

[Lucrecia Velasquez · Rating 5 out of 5]

Failing up is more than just a professor’s odyssey of flunking, determination and hope. Dr. Hong’s memoir on her life experiences are truly motivational. Not to mention the well-known quotes she includes with each chapter. As her life progresses from one stage to the next, she involves a quote that we have all heard before but sheds new light providing deeper meaning with it. Much appreciated are the lesson’s she shares, not just through her self-motivation to learn more but through encouragement of her professors. Instead of selfishly saying that her professors kept her moving forward, she shares with the world their light whether about teaching, caring or the “true value of wisdom.”
Admittedly I am a current student of hers, but there is no bias in my remarks. She admirably reflects the wisdom shared in this book through her teaching style. Not saying this as an attempt to “kiss up” but I am whole-heartedly a respecter of Dr. Hong as she empowers teachers and future teachers (students) to become more. While this empowerment may slightly be influenced by her upbringing, the end of the book reveals that really, this empowerment comes from a deeper understanding of what teaching is, what knowledge is and who students are.

[Amelia Chen · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was inspired by reading this book. I love the quote from Leonard Cohen which is "There is a crack in everything. That's how the light gets in." From the book, I saw the hope in the author's life. As I read through Dr. Hong's experiences, I was encouraged and motivated by her. As I read the book, I believe everyone can change. I also got some ideas from being a good teacher. I always want to be a good teacher that can change their heart and life. I did not know what experiences I would have in the future, but I desire to prepare myself better, so I can help the students who have special needs or are struggling. The book Failing Up showed me that no matter how my students think they could not change, I need to help them believe in their potential.

[Xiunan Zhang · Rating 5 out of 5]

Failing up is telling a great story about Dr. Hong. As her student, I could always feel her passion from every class. I always feel she is the one with happiness, strength, and hard working. When I read this book, I started to realize everything I feel about her because of her aspirant desire. She just becomes who I always want to be. Even she had to face bad situation of her family and failure from school, she also was afraid and upset, but she made great example to rely on her faith to change her life. For me, she is a great and successful woman. There are too many things I need to learn and apply into my life. I am very grateful to be her student and know her experience of growing up and life changing.

[Anna · Rating 5 out of 5]

I thought this book was very inspiring, and it taught me what true hard work is. It was amazing to see how Dr. Hong accepted the challenges that life had to offer, and instead of giving up she pushed herself harder. Something that amazed me most was Dr. Hong's upbringing. This book is such a reminder that every individual is or has faced battles that stretch them and make them who they are today. This book shows how life isn't always perfect, but if we persevere and push ourselves, we can become the people that we are meant to be.

[Karinho · Rating 5 out of 5]

I think Failing Up is a good book for Asians to read. It really amazes me when I read about the trials that Dr. Hong had gone through in her childhood and her life. As an Asian, when I was reading the story of Barbara Hong, my childhood’s memories came into my mind. I lived with my parents in a small apartment in Hong Kong. I had one younger brother and one younger sister. My family is not rich, but I am so grateful for what I have already. However, there were so many times that I was scared to get lower than 90 points out of 100 points because I did not want my parents felt disappointed in me. I tried my best on the Hong Kong Certificate of Education Examination, but I did not get a good result. Therefore, I thought it was better to get a job and contribute to the family instead. But when I was 27 years old, I decided to go back to college and get a degree because I want to provide my parents a good living. This book really encourages me and I have the desire to be a good parent and good teacher in the future. Thank you, Dr. Hong.

[Chenyang Xu · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really like this book because it is a real story of a professor. There are no fake and overstate descriptions. I felt surprised when I read the beginning of the story. I just couldn't believe that Dr. Hong grew up in this kind of family. But it did influence her a lot to become stronger and excellent. I really enjoy reading her book and I also have learned a lot about how to turn the difficulties in my life into motivation. I am not perfect, but I can gain more experiences and improve myself. This book really inspires me about my future life. I hope I can apply what I have learned from this book. Highly recommend!!! It will surprise you and inspire you!

[Alisa Chen · Rating 5 out of 5]

It was a very inspiring book to read. I really would suggest everyone read it no matter how old or how young you are. From the first time when I saw Dr. Hong, I wanted to know her story. I wanted to know why, how, and what made her who she is today. Then she introduced us to the book in the class to everyone. After reading the book, which was about her own story, I have learned so much from her. I admire and respect her a lot after reading this book. This book really has motivated me to never give up and always be grateful for what we have. This book has touched my heart and made me ponder about my life. Her life story is amazing.

[Taylor Spencer]

This book is so inspirational! Hearing about Dr. Hong’s journey and beginnings gives me so much respect for who she is and where she is at today. She created the life she wanted regardless of her past and who her parents are, she knew what she wanted and achieved it. She is an example to me, to set mind to something and follow through no matter the trials I may face along the journey. It also taught me that the people in our lives can make the difference we need, and we can do the same in others lives. I would recommend this book to any classmate, friend or person looking for inspiration.

[Bev · Rating 5 out of 5]

Can I just say that I’ve never read a book like this!!! I couldn’t stop reading, I always wanted to find out what happens next just like when you are watching your favorite episode you just want to watch more and more and I got to say this book made me want to read more and more. I got to learn more about Dr. Hong and felt like by the end of the book I know her personally. I learned so much from her struggles and that nothing comes easy in life without hard work. Dr. Barbara overcame a lot in her life and I didn’t expect any of this happening in her life. Her book has inspired me to look on the brighter side and that we can do anything if we do not give up! Life is a challenge but we need to MAN up and act on finding our true potential. I loved the many quotes in the book that she shared as I have written on post notes and placed it on my wall to give me the motivation that I can also be like Dr.Hong. I liked what she wrote “My parents, my environment, even my genes may define my outcome and what makes myself but I am my own destiny” This made me think of my own upbringing and that I can relate to this book with the many sacrifices and struggles I go through in life. Now I’m telling my friends to read this book so they can be motivated just like how I am motivated now to try harder in life

[Abri Jones · Rating 5 out of 5]

Barbara Hong as written an eloquent novel describing her life. I finished the book so quickly because I could not put it down. Dr. Hong represents people who are overlooked or labeled as unintelligent because they are not given the time to succeed. Her life is a testament to being able to be successful in life despite her circumstances and expectations set by parents and teachers. Seeing her now, you could never guess she experienced all the hardships that she has. The most impactful part of the book to me was after she failed a grade in intermediate school. Hong gave herself a second chance even though her family and societal expectations told her to quit. After trying the year over again, she began her path to success. There was still opposition along the way, but she ultimately ended out on top. Her story is one of inspiration. After reading this book, I felt empowered.

[Dujon Chase · Rating 5 out of 5]

I personally thought it was quite an interesting book overall. I'm not a serious reader nor do I like to read books. This book has very deep feelings and thoughts about Barbara's upbringing. I appreciate her effort to go to such lengths to explain moments so personal to her. I'm truly amazed at her ability to remember all these scenarios in such vivid clarity. The first 3 quarters of the book made me feel sad from all of her struggles and doubts, however my favorite part is when she takes the amazing leap to take school for another year. This was the positive twist I was hoping for and looked forward to. I did like the book but probably wouldn't read it again, not because its bad, but because I don't like to read.

[Zhu Lin · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really like this book, I learned how to care students from this book. Also, I felt sad when I read Barbara’s childhood. This is a really good book.

[Emily Peterson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Failing up was an amazing book. My favorite thing about it is how Barbara overcame adversity. She was dealt a poor hand in life, but with hard work and determination she was able to overcome the hardships and go on to be a very successful professional. As an individual I learned many things about life, about being a teacher and a student. On the teacher side of things I learned that each student has the capability to succeed and we should teach children that way, and that all a student really needs is for one teacher to believe in them, and with that spark of faith the student will be able to accomplish amazing things in both education and their everyday life. As a student I really learned not to be afraid of hard things. That all good and worth while things in life will be hard, and it is okay to take time to do them. I learned not to be afraid to fail. This book influenced me to be ambitious in my studies and to take on hard tasks and things I might be heasitent to do, such as getting a masters degree. I would recommend this book to friends, and I have! It was a good book, not hard to read, and is overall a great book that makes you grateful and it makes you think.

[Cheng · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book inspire us to work hard even facing the difficulties. Challenging can turn to be our motivation and push us to grow higher. The author experienced a lot of struggling and difficulties. She did not give up, and she keep learning and growing. She sat a good example for many people who are experiencing their trials.

[Deedra · Rating 4 out of 5]

My favorite parts of the book would have to be the vivid details of the story in the beginning as it made me reflect on my home in Malaysia. Along with that, I realize how the author’s background is relatable to mine as I was reminded of my background with the education I received throughout the years. I like that the author was also able to focus more on the positive rather than the negative and made me understand how teachers and educators have their own stories and what made eventually led them to being teachers. I am also now much more encouraged to try and understand where a person is coming from especially if I were to be a teacher. I’d certainly try to walk in my student’s shoes, understand their background knowledge as they master the material I am teaching them. One certainly learns the most from one’s mistakes and it helps to keep persevering and obtain as much knowledge as you can in this life. I would certainly recommend this book to others.

[Sherrie Estrada · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really liked this book and how it was written. It has a very "Joy Luck Club" feel to it, in that it shows the difference of culture throughout the generations and the stories behind the characters' motivations. The story is extremely humbling and written from the heart.

[Ashleigh Liu Pu]

Doctor Hong's childhood was like most of the typical Chinese family. Different stress, disappointments, drama. Doctor Hong's perspective of life didn't change until the age of 10 when her aunty brought her to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Doctor Hong never sees people like LDS members. They gave her hope of the life she lives now. She never observes her own value until she encountered with LDS members. "Falling up" this book is not only a story of a professor, but a invitation and suggestion for those who are preparing to become a teacher. Doctor Hong's decision of wanting to study Special Education change her perspective in her life. Before coming to study at Brigham Young University she didn't know what does she wants to become in the future, she didn't know a lot of knowledge or skills when she first entered the college; however, applying for a position "research assistant" changed her whole life for her career. A professor named professor Jackson offered her the position as his research assistant even that time she didn't know how to use the computer. The more Doctor Hong does for this position on campus, the more she likes about Special Education. Even though her families and friends back home in Singapore didn't support her decision of becoming a special education teacher, Doctor Hong knows what was she doing, and she has to follow that feeling of preparing to become a teacher for those children who have special needs. In her preparation of becoming a teacher, she encountered her husband at a school dance, they got married after 2 months of dating. Doctor Hong then became a wife and a mother after graduating from BYU-H and then finished her Master degree around the age of 30's. I can't even image how did Doctor Hong do it to accomplish her Master and Doctor's diplomas without family's help only with her husband, but she did it. All because of her faith and determination of how much she wants to become a special education teacher. My most favorite part of this book was whenever Doctor Hong expresses the love she has for her father. How much appreciation she felt the fatherhood when she also becomes a mother on her own. She emphasized the love of the fatherhood so deeply that tells us the importance of parenthood as well.

[Lung Michelle · Rating 5 out of 5]

A year ago as I was sitting in Dr. Hong's class, she shared this quote with us, "Don't compare your life to others. There is no comparison between the star, the moon, and the stars. They shine when it's their time." I found that quote inspiring but it did not astonish me much until I finished reading "Failing Up." This quote is on the last few pages of the book, and it is a perfect illustration of her life. Dr. Hong does shine. She truly shines at her own time.

My first impression about Dr. Hong was that she must have been smart and gifted her whole life, but never have I ever thought that her life was full of challenges and failures. Her teacher would not have thought that she would shine one day. She was not even considered as someone with great potential. This book proved my perception wrong. I hope that I will not have these kinds of wrong impressions about my future students.

How many students are being underestimated or looked down upon because of their circumstances? How many people are still being regarded as "stupid" or "dumb" by their teachers? This book makes me ponder the questions above. The most important question is "how many Dr. Hongs do we have out there?" This book does not only inspire me to dare to dream, but also to help my future students see their potential. Dr. Hong thanks again for writing this book. It is a must-read book for educators, parents, or even everyone.

[Manny Swart · Rating 5 out of 5]

An Inspiring Journey
This book illustrates the harsh and difficult childhood and adolescent life that Barbara Hong went through. Despite her living circumstances, below average performance in school and poor relationships with family members, she still achieved and continues to achieve very much, hence the term "failing up". When she was a child, her mom had little expectations of her achieving anything. One of her mom's best wishes for her and all of her siblings was to be a receptionist in an office because "there is air conditioning". Of course, every mom wants the best for their child and so did Dr. Hong's mother, but she had to be realistic with what the world has in store for her daughter. In fact, her mother helped her drink soup concoctions to make her brain stronger and smarter because of the physical toll she took as an embryo when she was still in the womb. Many people did not expect much of Dr. Hong, but through perseverance, grit, faith, love and a strong desire to learn she was able and continues to accomplish very much as an educator, international consultant, mother, sister, daughter, and all the titles she holds. She is an inspiring teacher, who is motivated to help her students learn how to teach and make schools a safe learning environment for all children of different strengths, weaknesses, and abilities.