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Relational Reset: Unlearning the Habits that Hold You Back
From the author of "Reclaiming Hope and Healing for Trauma, Stress, and Overwhelming Life Events" comes this Selah Award Finalist on a topic everyone can relate Relationships. So, a re your relationships all that you want them to be?
Despite our best intentions, we all have blind spots--bad relational habits that are keeping us from enjoying our relationships fully. And since relationships stand at the center of all we are and all we do, if we can learn to do relationships better, every aspect of our lives improves. Whether you struggle to overcome past wounds, insecurity, blame, or envy, it's time to reflect on your relational habits and reset them so that your relationships can be all you want them to be.
An experienced counselor and professor, Dr. Laurel Shaler is passionate about helping women thrive in all of their relationships. Relational Reset will reveal unhealthy patterns that may be holding you back, give you practical steps for improving your relationships, and help you find your ultimate security and identity in Jesus Christ. When you reset your relationships, you honor God, yourself, and the ones you love.
What are you waiting for? Get started today.
Despite our best intentions, we all have blind spots--bad relational habits that are keeping us from enjoying our relationships fully. And since relationships stand at the center of all we are and all we do, if we can learn to do relationships better, every aspect of our lives improves. Whether you struggle to overcome past wounds, insecurity, blame, or envy, it's time to reflect on your relational habits and reset them so that your relationships can be all you want them to be.
An experienced counselor and professor, Dr. Laurel Shaler is passionate about helping women thrive in all of their relationships. Relational Reset will reveal unhealthy patterns that may be holding you back, give you practical steps for improving your relationships, and help you find your ultimate security and identity in Jesus Christ. When you reset your relationships, you honor God, yourself, and the ones you love.
What are you waiting for? Get started today.
176 pages, Paperback
Published February 5, 2019
5 people are currently reading
93 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 32 reviews
January 30, 2023
This book is a great resource for anyone wanting an easy to read guide for relationship help with a Christian worldview. Each chapter contains a different topic relating to the issues that hinder or harm relationships in our lives. For example, some topics included insecurity, disappointment, envy, and more. The chapters also included biblical wisdom on how to overcome them and avoid falling into a destructive habit. I found myself convicted several times over the way I communicate or express my insecurities within my relationships.
One aspect that I admired in this book was the clear stance it took on sin affecting our relationships. Sin affects every part of life, and it is extremely evident in the way people relate to one another. I appreciated that Dr. Shaler did not shy away from this very important point. Another point I liked that she stated was our most important relationship is the one we have with God. If that one is not healthy, we cannot expect to improve the relationships in our lives without His guidance and grace. In conclusion, this book is a good resource to have on hand when counseling others (and yourself!) to strengthen your marriage and friendships. Consider reading this book if you are interested in practical relationship advice rooted in scripture!
One aspect that I admired in this book was the clear stance it took on sin affecting our relationships. Sin affects every part of life, and it is extremely evident in the way people relate to one another. I appreciated that Dr. Shaler did not shy away from this very important point. Another point I liked that she stated was our most important relationship is the one we have with God. If that one is not healthy, we cannot expect to improve the relationships in our lives without His guidance and grace. In conclusion, this book is a good resource to have on hand when counseling others (and yourself!) to strengthen your marriage and friendships. Consider reading this book if you are interested in practical relationship advice rooted in scripture!
March 15, 2019
RATING 3.5 STARS
When we reset our relationships with God at the center, loving others as we love ourselves, God is glorified.
If you are struggling with relationships, there be many reasons for it. The fear of abandonment, insecurity, envy, just to name a few. We begin a habit of sabotage in our relationships, never really knowing how to balance our emotions and love others well. This all can lead to not knowing how to communicate your feelings and being misunderstood.
Each chapter focuses on a insecurity, disappointment, overcoming offenses, talking straight, dismissing blame, envy, fear, judgment, past hurts. With these chapters, we see examples and maybe you will see yourself and with those examples responses that can help build healthier relationships.
The text sets you on a journey to discover how your respond to situations that may cause you pain and insecurities. What you tell yourself and what you can begin to tell yourself. One of the key questions that came up that I thought was relevant is how we define self-worth. How you value yourself and how you let others value you. A reminder that our self-worth is who we belong to in Christ. Knowing who we belong to goes with taking responsibility. We must take responsibility for our emotions and feelings. Blaming, insecurities, fear only build walls but taking the responsibility for those feelings, we can start a new habit of enjoying the relationships that God gifts us with. How we love others matters. It matters to you and to those you love.
A Special Thank you to Moody Publishing and Netgalley for the ARC and the opportunity to post an honest review.
When we reset our relationships with God at the center, loving others as we love ourselves, God is glorified.
If you are struggling with relationships, there be many reasons for it. The fear of abandonment, insecurity, envy, just to name a few. We begin a habit of sabotage in our relationships, never really knowing how to balance our emotions and love others well. This all can lead to not knowing how to communicate your feelings and being misunderstood.
Each chapter focuses on a insecurity, disappointment, overcoming offenses, talking straight, dismissing blame, envy, fear, judgment, past hurts. With these chapters, we see examples and maybe you will see yourself and with those examples responses that can help build healthier relationships.
The text sets you on a journey to discover how your respond to situations that may cause you pain and insecurities. What you tell yourself and what you can begin to tell yourself. One of the key questions that came up that I thought was relevant is how we define self-worth. How you value yourself and how you let others value you. A reminder that our self-worth is who we belong to in Christ. Knowing who we belong to goes with taking responsibility. We must take responsibility for our emotions and feelings. Blaming, insecurities, fear only build walls but taking the responsibility for those feelings, we can start a new habit of enjoying the relationships that God gifts us with. How we love others matters. It matters to you and to those you love.
A Special Thank you to Moody Publishing and Netgalley for the ARC and the opportunity to post an honest review.
February 17, 2019
The relationships we experience with those around us are supposed to be one of life’s greatest sources of joys, but what happens when those close relationships start to sour, leaving us feeling frustrated, drained, and emotionally exhausted?
According to Dr. Laura Shaler, a nationally certified Christian counselor and licensed social worker, it might be time for us to take a step back from our relationships and turn our eyes inward to see if there are any relational habits that we have that we don’t realize we have that might be causing us to unintentionally sabotage the relationships that we are in!
Relationship Reset explores 11 key relationship areas that are vital to any healthy relationship and teaches us skills that we may not have gained in dealing with these issues. The author’s rare blend of clinical insights, biblical wisdom, and hands-on exercises make this essential reading!
If you want to be in healthier relationships with others, Relational Reset will teach you how to be a better spouse, parent and friend!
This excerpt is taken from the original review that is published on my blog. To read my review in its entirety, please visit Create With Joy.
According to Dr. Laura Shaler, a nationally certified Christian counselor and licensed social worker, it might be time for us to take a step back from our relationships and turn our eyes inward to see if there are any relational habits that we have that we don’t realize we have that might be causing us to unintentionally sabotage the relationships that we are in!
Relationship Reset explores 11 key relationship areas that are vital to any healthy relationship and teaches us skills that we may not have gained in dealing with these issues. The author’s rare blend of clinical insights, biblical wisdom, and hands-on exercises make this essential reading!
If you want to be in healthier relationships with others, Relational Reset will teach you how to be a better spouse, parent and friend!
This excerpt is taken from the original review that is published on my blog. To read my review in its entirety, please visit Create With Joy.
February 2, 2023
Relationships are hard and messy. As humans we mess them up every day. But that doesn’t mean we don’t need them either. In our flesh, we take the hurts and wounds of our failed past relationships and form armor to protect us going into new ones. But that can often damage the new relationships before they even have a chance to start. We are flawed people, and people will hurt people. It’s a fact in life as unfortunate as it is. None of us are perfect. But recognizing our flaws as well as acknowledging the hurts that have been done to us and how to heal from them help us to grow as people and to not project past pains into future (and present) relationships. This book had a lot of great insight and things to think about when it comes to considering relationships with others and how to approach them. I’m definitely glad I gave it a read and have a lot of things to really think through after reading. I highly recommend it.
*I received a copy of this book through JustRead Tours. Thoughts and opinions expressed are mine alone.
*I received a copy of this book through JustRead Tours. Thoughts and opinions expressed are mine alone.
February 4, 2023
This is one of those books that is a great resource for needing more of a guide for relationship help within a Christian worldview. Chapters include different topics such as insecurity, disappointment, envy and relating to different type of relationships that may harm us. The author also includes Biblical wisdom on how to overcome and help with not falling into a destructive habit.
One thing that stuck out to me was that the author emphasizes that our self worth is who we are in Christ. Overall I thought it was a pretty informational book and I would definitely purchase this for a newer Christian or someone who has a habit of relationships that do not uplift them.
I received a copy of this book through Just Read. I was not required to post a positive review. All views expressed are only my honest opinion.
One thing that stuck out to me was that the author emphasizes that our self worth is who we are in Christ. Overall I thought it was a pretty informational book and I would definitely purchase this for a newer Christian or someone who has a habit of relationships that do not uplift them.
I received a copy of this book through Just Read. I was not required to post a positive review. All views expressed are only my honest opinion.
January 30, 2023
Relational Reset by Dr. Laurel Shaler is an important read for anyone who wants to have healthier relationships. Even if you feel like your relationship are solid, there’s something in this book for you. The author does a great job of helping you self-reflect and identify areas in your own behavior or mind that may need improvement–all without being preachy or judgmental. And I was very impressed with how Dr. Shaler incorporated faith into each area of potential growth and healing within relationships. I felt like the faith element was incorporated naturally into each chapter and was an added inspiration to change your way of thinking. I thought the personal questions at the end of each chapter were both a good review of the topic covered and helped me to apply the points Dr. Shaler made to my personal experience.
Overall, I felt like this was a very informative and relevant book for today’s world. Having the added bonus of a faith perspective made it an even better read for me. I would emphasize that even if you aren’t having major problems in your relationships, you can still learn from this book! I look forward to other titles by this author.
I was given a copy of this book by the author with no expectations of a positive review. All opinions are my own.
Overall, I felt like this was a very informative and relevant book for today’s world. Having the added bonus of a faith perspective made it an even better read for me. I would emphasize that even if you aren’t having major problems in your relationships, you can still learn from this book! I look forward to other titles by this author.
I was given a copy of this book by the author with no expectations of a positive review. All opinions are my own.
February 1, 2023
We are made for community and relationships. But sometimes, those relationships hit a sour note. In Relational Reset: Unlearning the Habits that Hold You Back, Dr. Laurel Shaler gives readers a high-level look at some areas that can be relationship killers. These include things like insecurity, envy, fear, and disappointment.
While Shaler doesn’t go too deep into any one area (the book is under 200 pages, after all), she gives real-life experiences from her clients as well as Biblical insights and questions to ask yourself in each chapter.
It’s important to examine our hearts when dealing with a difficult or dying relationship because sometimes it’s our sin that is causing the strife. This book is a great resource to keep on hand to give me that little reminder that when a relationship is struggling, I am accountable for my part in the fracture and if it’s a sin area, it’s something I need to address with God before trying to make amends with a friend or family member.
Disclosure statement: I voluntarily reviewed a complimentary copy of this book and was not required to write a positive or negative review. All opinions are my own.
While Shaler doesn’t go too deep into any one area (the book is under 200 pages, after all), she gives real-life experiences from her clients as well as Biblical insights and questions to ask yourself in each chapter.
It’s important to examine our hearts when dealing with a difficult or dying relationship because sometimes it’s our sin that is causing the strife. This book is a great resource to keep on hand to give me that little reminder that when a relationship is struggling, I am accountable for my part in the fracture and if it’s a sin area, it’s something I need to address with God before trying to make amends with a friend or family member.
Disclosure statement: I voluntarily reviewed a complimentary copy of this book and was not required to write a positive or negative review. All opinions are my own.
January 26, 2023
Each chapter has a story about a relationship struggle relating to the title and how that experience can damage connections with others. As a mental health professional, the author shares both personal and client stories for real life examples of situations that women in particular fall into and the sometimes lifelong consequences.
Scripture is scattered throughout the book so the reader is always reminded of God's word for our lives. At the end of each chapter is a "Working on myself" section where the reader has questions and journal prompts to further reflect on the titled topic followed by a short prayer.
I took my time with this book. Several times while reading I would stop and share a passage with either my daughter or my fiance. It helped me articulate some of the things that have surfaced so far this year so we can grow in maturity together.
I voluntarily reviewed a complimentary copy of this book which I received from the author. All views expressed are only my honest opinion.
Scripture is scattered throughout the book so the reader is always reminded of God's word for our lives. At the end of each chapter is a "Working on myself" section where the reader has questions and journal prompts to further reflect on the titled topic followed by a short prayer.
I took my time with this book. Several times while reading I would stop and share a passage with either my daughter or my fiance. It helped me articulate some of the things that have surfaced so far this year so we can grow in maturity together.
I voluntarily reviewed a complimentary copy of this book which I received from the author. All views expressed are only my honest opinion.
February 3, 2023
Dr. Laurel Shaler’s new Relational Reset: Unlearning the Habits that Hold You Back, is the perfect book to read if you have habits that sabotage your relationships. I'm not going to lie, this book was a tough read for me. There were prayers in the book that I prayed and questions that you could take to the Lord and ponder about. After I closed the pages of this book, the Lord started healing me almost immediately and downloaded things into my spirit. I've never cried so much after reading a book, but unexpectedly I felt freer than I did hurt. I really enjoyed this book, and it took a huge weight off of me.
Relationships are tough and will always be, but with God's help, we can reset them to be what God intended them to be: with Him at the center, loving others as we love ourselves. When we do these things, God is glorified. This book helps you tackle the issues and habits that have been holding you back in your relationship. You will learn ways to break bad habits and build healthier bonds and take steps to silence insecurities, and deal with disappointment. You will work to overcome offenses and talk straight. It will help you create good boundaries and battle unmet expectations. You will kick envy to the curb and forget all about fear. You will let go of the things in your past that was harming your relationships today. You'll be able to surrender judgment, dismiss blame, and take responsibility for yourself. You can apologize, forgive, and leave payback to God.
I really enjoyed this book, and truly think it is a reset we all need. I found such comfort and biblical advice within the pages and enjoyed the questions and prayers found throughout. My favorite part of the book was how we define self-worth and how we should anchor that in Christ. We must take responsibility for our emotions and feelings, and by blaming others and having insecurity and fear we only build walls and habits that keep us from loving ourselves and others well. I love the sound advice on how we can reset, overcome, and love well through it all ... as this is what we are called to do.
Disclosure: I voluntarily reviewed a complimentary copy of this book which I received from the author. All views expressed are only my honest opinion.
Relationships are tough and will always be, but with God's help, we can reset them to be what God intended them to be: with Him at the center, loving others as we love ourselves. When we do these things, God is glorified. This book helps you tackle the issues and habits that have been holding you back in your relationship. You will learn ways to break bad habits and build healthier bonds and take steps to silence insecurities, and deal with disappointment. You will work to overcome offenses and talk straight. It will help you create good boundaries and battle unmet expectations. You will kick envy to the curb and forget all about fear. You will let go of the things in your past that was harming your relationships today. You'll be able to surrender judgment, dismiss blame, and take responsibility for yourself. You can apologize, forgive, and leave payback to God.
I really enjoyed this book, and truly think it is a reset we all need. I found such comfort and biblical advice within the pages and enjoyed the questions and prayers found throughout. My favorite part of the book was how we define self-worth and how we should anchor that in Christ. We must take responsibility for our emotions and feelings, and by blaming others and having insecurity and fear we only build walls and habits that keep us from loving ourselves and others well. I love the sound advice on how we can reset, overcome, and love well through it all ... as this is what we are called to do.
Disclosure: I voluntarily reviewed a complimentary copy of this book which I received from the author. All views expressed are only my honest opinion.
February 4, 2019
If we are going to have relationships, we're going to have trouble. We are all human and certainly not perfect, after all. Is there hope for repairing relationships?
Shaler gives a enthusiastic “yes.” She addresses several issues that hinder healthy relationships and gives good strategy for repair. She is even convinced that we can unlearn bad habits that have damaged relationships in the past.
My favorite chapter is the one on insecurity. My insecurity sabotaged so many of my friendships as a teen. I like how Shaler encourages us to see our identity in Christ, reminding ourselves what Scripture says about us. She reminds us we are to seek God's praise, not that of humans and we should be more concerned about what God thinks about us than people. I wish I had had this teaching when I was a teen.
Shaler writes about disappointment, taking offense, not talking straight, blaming, experiencing envy, fear, judging, letting the past rule, seeking revenge, and more. She includes stories illustrating the problem, practical steps to take, questions for journaling, and a written prayer for each topic.
I found some of her suggestions surprising. Developing empathy is essential for not being susceptible to easily taking offense. Stop trying to fix people and their circumstances is suggested to help curtail judging. Accepting responsibility is one aspect of ending the blame game, as is confronting blamers. Now that is a scary strategy to me.
I recommend this book to readers who want to have healthy relationships. It is not a cure all book nor is the strategy included easy. Forgiving and setting boundaries might take prayerful effort, for example. Shaler reminds us that good relationships are worth the work.
I received a complimentary copy of this book from the publisher. My comments are an independent and honest review.
Shaler gives a enthusiastic “yes.” She addresses several issues that hinder healthy relationships and gives good strategy for repair. She is even convinced that we can unlearn bad habits that have damaged relationships in the past.
My favorite chapter is the one on insecurity. My insecurity sabotaged so many of my friendships as a teen. I like how Shaler encourages us to see our identity in Christ, reminding ourselves what Scripture says about us. She reminds us we are to seek God's praise, not that of humans and we should be more concerned about what God thinks about us than people. I wish I had had this teaching when I was a teen.
Shaler writes about disappointment, taking offense, not talking straight, blaming, experiencing envy, fear, judging, letting the past rule, seeking revenge, and more. She includes stories illustrating the problem, practical steps to take, questions for journaling, and a written prayer for each topic.
I found some of her suggestions surprising. Developing empathy is essential for not being susceptible to easily taking offense. Stop trying to fix people and their circumstances is suggested to help curtail judging. Accepting responsibility is one aspect of ending the blame game, as is confronting blamers. Now that is a scary strategy to me.
I recommend this book to readers who want to have healthy relationships. It is not a cure all book nor is the strategy included easy. Forgiving and setting boundaries might take prayerful effort, for example. Shaler reminds us that good relationships are worth the work.
I received a complimentary copy of this book from the publisher. My comments are an independent and honest review.
February 15, 2019
"Relational Reset: Unlearning the Habits That Hold You Back" by Dr. Laurel Shaler is a practical guide to understanding relationships. Using examples from her clinical practice, she provides common sense approaches to identifying bad habits and stumbling blocks in relationships, while offering suggestions on creating healthy boundaries.
Each chapter poses insightful questions that challenge the reader to look within and offers a closing prayer. Chapters cover specific issues that individuals face today: disappointment, fear, envy, judgment, and blame. Building on each area, she addresses these aspects and shares how we can move past what is hindering our relationships.
This book provides valuable knowledge on relationships and communication styles. Dr. Shaler reminds us that good relationships are worth the effort and that each of us needs to accept people as they are. I recommend this book to those who are seeking to overcome offenses, forget fears, and let go of things in the past that are harming relationships today.
I received a preview copy of the book from Moody Publishers. All opinions are my own.
Each chapter poses insightful questions that challenge the reader to look within and offers a closing prayer. Chapters cover specific issues that individuals face today: disappointment, fear, envy, judgment, and blame. Building on each area, she addresses these aspects and shares how we can move past what is hindering our relationships.
This book provides valuable knowledge on relationships and communication styles. Dr. Shaler reminds us that good relationships are worth the effort and that each of us needs to accept people as they are. I recommend this book to those who are seeking to overcome offenses, forget fears, and let go of things in the past that are harming relationships today.
I received a preview copy of the book from Moody Publishers. All opinions are my own.
February 8, 2023
Although there are many Christian books written about relationship issues, wouldn't you like to read one that can use the Bible to solve problems?
The new book, Relational Reset, by author Laurel Shaler, is an excellent way to dive into simple but prevalent relationship problems we all face. Whether we are Christians or not, problems with our relationships can easily move from simple to complex. If we have a clear way to deal quickly with these problems, they can usually be "fixed" in no time at all.
My favorite thing about this book is how it presents the chapters. Each one deals with a specific relational problem and a plan to resolve it. This includes lined sections of each chapter which ask a specific question to take you step by step through the "reset" plan. Your problem may not be resolved as quickly as filling in the blanks, but you will have the tools to complete the work.
With God's grace, your Bible, and Relational Reset, the reader has everything needed to improve their relationships.
I voluntarily reviewed a complimentary copy of this book which I received from the author. All views expressed are only my honest opinion.
The new book, Relational Reset, by author Laurel Shaler, is an excellent way to dive into simple but prevalent relationship problems we all face. Whether we are Christians or not, problems with our relationships can easily move from simple to complex. If we have a clear way to deal quickly with these problems, they can usually be "fixed" in no time at all.
My favorite thing about this book is how it presents the chapters. Each one deals with a specific relational problem and a plan to resolve it. This includes lined sections of each chapter which ask a specific question to take you step by step through the "reset" plan. Your problem may not be resolved as quickly as filling in the blanks, but you will have the tools to complete the work.
With God's grace, your Bible, and Relational Reset, the reader has everything needed to improve their relationships.
I voluntarily reviewed a complimentary copy of this book which I received from the author. All views expressed are only my honest opinion.
March 4, 2019
My wife and I received an advance of this book from Moody right around the beginning of the year. So we thought why not go through it as a couple's study. While the book is obviously written to women; the issues it enlightens speak to men too. We've been married for more than 31 years and each have our quirks but this book helped even us identify some of the underlying causes in a gentle enough way that lead to healing some deep seated stuff.
As a pastor I'm often walking along side of couples who are going through stuff so I suspect this book will be passed on very soon. It has good interaction with the Biblical narratives that she draws upon and some straight shooting personal anecdotes but the author soon lets you know that Jesus is her source of strength when life bites. As Dr. Laura Shaler says, "It can be challenging to trust God in the middle of dark and challenging circumstances, but when we study God’s Word and see what happens when people put their trust in Him, it builds our faith" (135).
For it's content and readability it's a five star from me.
As a pastor I'm often walking along side of couples who are going through stuff so I suspect this book will be passed on very soon. It has good interaction with the Biblical narratives that she draws upon and some straight shooting personal anecdotes but the author soon lets you know that Jesus is her source of strength when life bites. As Dr. Laura Shaler says, "It can be challenging to trust God in the middle of dark and challenging circumstances, but when we study God’s Word and see what happens when people put their trust in Him, it builds our faith" (135).
For it's content and readability it's a five star from me.
February 1, 2019
I received this book as an advanced copy for an honest review. Honest it will be. I wasn’t sure how much I would take from this book, but it definitely struck a chord. I realized I have a lot more to work on than I thought. Not only that but I think we all have a particular area this book touches on that we can take something away from it. Regardless of how together you may think your relationships are we all deal with envy, casting judgment and having a hard time forgiving others. I picked this book up thinking I wouldn’t need my highlighter. A few pages in I was scrambling to find it and didn’t put it down till I closed the book. The questions at the end of each chapter also help you to think through the points and really focus on what you may have been thinking as you read each chapter. It’s definitely helpful book. I also created a list of people who I think could definitely benefit from this book as I was reading it.
February 27, 2019
I love that this book starts out with how to silence insecurities. I think that is a wonderful way to start this book in learning how to better understand and communicate with other people. I think that books that help you with your self worth are truly amazing tools and Dr. Laurel Shaler didn't disappoint. Not only does she remind you who you are in Christ but she follows it up with scripture so you can further study it. I love how she left space to answer the questions she asked you, how different things have affected your life and looking into what can help you. She helps you with dealing with disappointment, envy, and so much more in a biblical way. I think that her book will help anyone that needs a relationship to reset no matter if its a mother relationship or a marriage. She gives amazing advice and helps thats will truly turn your life around. I received the book from the publishers but all thoughts are my own.
February 28, 2019
Relational Reset addresses many factors that hinder relationships. Dr. Shaler brings each of these factors to light by introducing them with their personal stories or stories of clients that she has helped. With addressing each of these factors, she shares how we can move past them hindering our relationships.
Relational Reset would be a good book for many people to read. The factors that she shares about are affecting relationships everywhere, especially with the rise of social media. Some of the factors Dr. Shaler addresses in her book are insecurity, envy, fear, judgement, and things that we have dealt with in the past.
I appreciate that Dr. Shaler has included a section at the end of each chapter that allows for readers to reflect on questions. There is also a prayer that is included as well.
Relational Reset would be a good book for many people to read. The factors that she shares about are affecting relationships everywhere, especially with the rise of social media. Some of the factors Dr. Shaler addresses in her book are insecurity, envy, fear, judgement, and things that we have dealt with in the past.
I appreciate that Dr. Shaler has included a section at the end of each chapter that allows for readers to reflect on questions. There is also a prayer that is included as well.
January 30, 2023
I appreciated that this book covers a variety of topics that affect the many different relationships in our lives. From friendships to those with family and spouses, this book was insightful and well written. I always appreciate when an author shares personal experiences and stories from those they have worked with to bring home their message. The author did a wonderful job of blending together personal stories, scripture, and wisdom on ways to improve our relationships. I appreciated her identifying the different ways that the unhealthy habits can hit us, since it has been easy for me to think that I don't struggle with insecurities as much, but I could really relate to that chapter! This is a wonderful book to pick up and use to help improve relationships!
I received this book from Just Read. This is my honest review.
I received this book from Just Read. This is my honest review.
February 18, 2019
I received this book from Moody Publishers in exchange for an honest review. Shaler writes in a humorous, relatable tone. The examples she used helped me apply the subject matter to my own life. Some of the truth within this book’s pages are hard to hear. But Relational Reset is the honest conversation with a good friend that everyone needs. More than once. I loved how the chapters were short, sweet, and to the point. And each chapter (excluding the final) included a set of application questions to make you stop and think about your own relationships and the steps you can take to heal them. I highly recommend this read.
February 20, 2019
I will admit when I first signed up for the launch team of this book I thought it was about resetting your marriage relationship. I quickly realized that Shaler tackles all relationships, not just marriage!
For example, have you ever looked up and realized that you have a difficult time with friendship? Do you have interactions with people and wonder why they are so awkward or forced? Have you ever left a conversation thinking that someone was a total jerk only to fond out later it was all just a big misunderstanding?
That is where Dr. Shaler's book comes in!
In the 12 chapters Dr. Shaler takes the reader through the process of untangling difficult interactions and figuring out what YOU can do to improve the relationship and ensure that interaction doesn't happen again. Each chapter has 3-5 questions to help you better grasp the concept and begin steps to improve your relationships. The main takeaway for me came on page 53 where Dr Shaler writes, " On one side, we work hard not to be offended, while on the other side, we work hard not to offend". Doesn't that almost perfectly sum up 90% of interactions? How different would life be if we all worked to implement that simple idea into everyday life?
Overall, I give Relational Reset a B+. It is a simple but effective tool that would be wise to have in the shed of anyone who works with people. Pastors, teachers, counselors could all have this book on hand to be able to help people process through complex emotions when dealing with other people. I would LOVE to see Dr. Shaler write an edition of this book specifically geared towards helping children establish healthy relationships.
For example, have you ever looked up and realized that you have a difficult time with friendship? Do you have interactions with people and wonder why they are so awkward or forced? Have you ever left a conversation thinking that someone was a total jerk only to fond out later it was all just a big misunderstanding?
That is where Dr. Shaler's book comes in!
In the 12 chapters Dr. Shaler takes the reader through the process of untangling difficult interactions and figuring out what YOU can do to improve the relationship and ensure that interaction doesn't happen again. Each chapter has 3-5 questions to help you better grasp the concept and begin steps to improve your relationships. The main takeaway for me came on page 53 where Dr Shaler writes, " On one side, we work hard not to be offended, while on the other side, we work hard not to offend". Doesn't that almost perfectly sum up 90% of interactions? How different would life be if we all worked to implement that simple idea into everyday life?
Overall, I give Relational Reset a B+. It is a simple but effective tool that would be wise to have in the shed of anyone who works with people. Pastors, teachers, counselors could all have this book on hand to be able to help people process through complex emotions when dealing with other people. I would LOVE to see Dr. Shaler write an edition of this book specifically geared towards helping children establish healthy relationships.
February 25, 2019
Relational Reset by Dr. Laurel Shaler is one of the best books I've read dealing with relationships, psychology, and the Bible. The quote "Your basic need in life is for relationships" by Henry Cloud and John Townsend, shows us that all of our life we will deal with people. How we deal with them is another question. Dr. Shaler helps us discover different ways of responding to people and presenting ourselves to people. I believe everyone should pick this book up and read all the way through. I'm glad to have been a part of this launch group.
February 8, 2023
This book turned out to be quite different than I expected. The content seems quite informative for the most part but I find a lot of the information a bit repetitive throughout what I’ve read so far. I have every intention of finishing the book however, I needed a break from it. Based on what I have read thus far it is quite easy to digest. The author did a good job at breaking apart the information.
I voluntarily reviewed a complimentary copy of this book which I received from the author. All views expressed are only my honest opinion.
I voluntarily reviewed a complimentary copy of this book which I received from the author. All views expressed are only my honest opinion.
January 28, 2019
Relational Reset has been such a blessing and a reminder of what are some hindrances to building strong, healthy relationships. Dr. Shaler exposes insidious and destructive thoughts and behaviors that keep us emotional invalids, enslaved to doubt, envy, and fear. In addition, she provides a myriad of true experiences that illustrate her claims. The illustrations are so poignant and relevant. Furthermore, she ends each chapter with a word of prayer.
I find the book extremely helpful.
I find the book extremely helpful.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
December 5, 2018
The author relayed mostly common sense wisdom, but in a thoughtful, non lecturing way. We all have to be brave enough to incorporate this advice into our relationships. So many woman struggle with asserting themselves in their relationships and communications and I love how the author handled that section.
Thank you netgalley for the opportunity to read and review this book!
Thank you netgalley for the opportunity to read and review this book!
February 1, 2023
A book on relationships that brings God back into our lives through the personal and helpful advice the Authors shares with us. Making Relational Reset more personal and turns the AUTHOR into a friend. The advice was something I used not only with my husband in our marriage but with my son and also my friends and family. I look forward to reading more of the Authors work.
May 5, 2020
I thought this book was great for helping us understand that you are not responsible for others' actions or perceptions and you have a responsibility to your self to step back from a situation that are not conducive to your growth.
July 25, 2021
I found some good tips in this book.
May 30, 2022
Excellent short book on how to deal with issues that can fracture relationships, looking at topics such as envy, fear, disappointment, judgment and overcoming offenses.
October 13, 2025
audiobook. Read with a grain of salt. Mostly trauma/abuse informed but still touting some harmful Christian cliques.
October 20, 2019
Relational Reset was a great read. I found it to be very enlightening and made me think. I can see myself rereading it in the future, as I feel like it is one of those books that you need to read several times to truly remember everything.
*Disclosure of Material Connection: I received one or more of the products or services mentioned above for free in the hope that I would mention/review it on my blog. I was not required to give a positive review, only my honest opinion - which I've done. All thoughts and opinions expressed are my own and I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255: "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.* (less) [edit]
*Disclosure of Material Connection: I received one or more of the products or services mentioned above for free in the hope that I would mention/review it on my blog. I was not required to give a positive review, only my honest opinion - which I've done. All thoughts and opinions expressed are my own and I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255: "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.* (less) [edit]
December 22, 2020
I read this book a few days before a gathering with difficult people in my life. When the difficult moments inevitably occurred, I remembered Dr. Shaler’s advice and bit my tongue. She offers wisdom from her own life and her private practice as a Christian counselor. I am always looking for life-tested, applicable tips for handling difficult situations. Dr. Shaler offers many in these no-nonsense, easy-to-read chapters with examples of how to respond in sticky situations. She tells on herself through relatable stories, which I found to be winsome. After reading Relational Reset, I have many more tools ready for the next time a challenging relationship problem arises.
Favorite quote:
“Our bonds can be healthier and stronger–we can experience more positive feelings toward one another and less conflict–when we are willing to take the risk of talking straight.”
I received a preview copy of Relational Reset from both Netgalley and Moody Publishers.
Favorite quote:
“Our bonds can be healthier and stronger–we can experience more positive feelings toward one another and less conflict–when we are willing to take the risk of talking straight.”
I received a preview copy of Relational Reset from both Netgalley and Moody Publishers.
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