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Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For?
Alba Castillo has always been gutsy. A self-proclaimed rebel, she flees her small village in Spain for adventure and new life in the States. But what she meets instead is the devil himself. After several failed relationships, the charming and charismatic Peter seems like a gift from Heaven. Until he isn’t. Cruel, controlling, and malicious, Peter will stop at nothing to win, even if it means destroying Alba, and her children, in the process. Left with nothing but her spirit, Alba faces the fight of her life as she struggles to break free from a man who wants her very soul. Malice Intent chronicles Alba’s descent into Hell with a man who decimates everything innocent and precious, including her health, family, and sanity. How does one escape pure evil?
- GenresNonfiction
239 pages, Kindle Edition
First published May 26, 2016
8 people are currently reading
755 people want to read
About the author
Alba Castillo
3 books32 followersSpanish by birth, Alba currently resides in the United States. Turning her life’s lessons into a positive career, becoming a Legal assistant and later on a Private Investigator, Alba is fueled by her love for her three children and the sad loss of her youngest child. As a single parent, Castillo is determined to provide and live as an example not only for them but also for others. At the age of forty-eight the diagnosis of Cancer furthered her challenges – stricken, demoralized but not beaten - the cancer has made its way from breast to bone, several tumors and relapses only make Castillo more determined than ever to speak out and conquer her life’s journey and leave a legacy of love and victory.
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July 31, 2018
(spoilers)
DNF 35%
I gave up on this book. I received a kindle version of it from a Goodreads giveaway, and I was excited to read it because of the subject matter and the great reviews on here. Now I'm wondering if I got the wrong book because this is one of the most poorly-written books I have ever come across.
First of all, there are glaring errors from the first page:
These errors continue steadily throughout, from comma splices to run-on sentences. As a copy editor, I was cringing the entire time. It was ridiculous. Where was the editor for this book? Where was the copy editor? Where were the friends who could have given it a read-through before it was published? How did it get to this point with so many fixable mistakes?
However, even with the mistakes, I probably still could have gotten through the book if it had any redeeming qualities besides the potential to be a good story. I have read three memoirs in the past month (this one, An Unquiet Mind: A Memoir of Moods and Madness, and Relentless: How a Massive Stroke Changed My Life for the Better) and all of them were bodies with sturdy skeletons but no muscles to propel them forward and no skin to make them more appealing to the senses. These authors are the kind of people you meet, and when you talk to them and hear their stories, you say "Wow, that's incredible! You should write a book!" Easier said than done. We tend to think that an amazing story is what matters most, but that story is nothing without good (hell, even just decent will do sometimes) writing. The best writers can make the most mundane and ordinary stories exciting, but bad writers make the most amazing stories boring.
If Castillo really went through everything she says she did, I feel for her and I commend her for getting through it all and eventually living her best life. However, even with what little of this book I read, I found myself questioning her at every turn. For example, did she really send her infant on a plane alone? Is that even legal? And if it is (which I'm pretty sure it's not) how could she keep coming into the US without a passport?
When I wasn't trying to figure out the logistics of the situations Castillo kept getting herself into, I was confused about where she was at different points, both geographically and chronologically. For example, at one point in the book she mentions that her oldest child helps take care of both of her other kids, but at that point in the story, she only had two children and hadn't even mentioned that she eventually had another. Throw in all the times Castillo, her children, her family, and her ex change states, cities, houses, jobs, and countries, and you have a lot of confusion.
Furthermore, (and I hate to say this considering the subject matter of the book, but please hear me out) I had a hard time sympathizing with Castillo. It's not that I don't understand how serious addiction and abuse are and how they can both get you in situations you would never ordinarily be in and put your children in danger as well, even when you want to protect them. It's just that I don't feel like Castillo was as honest as she could have been. I can feel for a drug addict who has bought drugs instead of toys for their children--if I can see how they got to that point and if they own up to it. Castillo does not. Instead, she claims,
Castillo presents this as a fact; there was simply no money to spare. Yet, not even ten pages later, she casually states,
So not only was she quietly skirting around the fact that she did have extra money that could have gone toward her kids, but she also left her kids with a near stranger (He later buys a house for them to live in, and she mentions that she had known him for nine months at that point, and this was before that) who she also says (at the top of this same page) doesn't like and ignores her young daughter. All so she can go buy cocaine. And then that man leaves both of these children alone. I'm not sure how old her daughter was at this point because the timeline is confusing, but she mentions needing a babysitter for both of her kids around this time, so her daughter is not old enough to be alone or babysitting her brother.
Castillo never seems to fully grasp the horrible decisions she has made. Sometimes she will claim that she has apologized to her children (and of course, according to her, they tell her she was the best mom ever) or she mentions that she has ruined everything or that everything has gone downhill and that's it's all her fault, but it seems like she doesn't really believe it, that she wants readers to feel sorry for her or see her as the hopeless victim instead of as a person with flaws who has made some bad choices.
We never get to know Castillo or the other people in her life. Instead, we are shown situations with two cardboard cutouts. In the beginning, we see the cutouts of her family, the traditional, boring, judgmental people who only care about keeping up appearances. On the other side is Castillo, the unique spontaneous one who stands up to them all and doesn't care what they think. This pattern continues with slight alterations as the book continues. The unimaginative teacher who doesn't believe Castillo can make it out of her hometown against the adventurous young Castillo who leaves and does exactly what she set out to do, the unfair boss against the brave Castillo who gets what she's owed, the evil family and wife of her ex against Castillo, the mother who only wanted what was best for her daughter and trusted and loved too much, and so on and so forth.
There is no nuance or understanding of others, even when it comes to her own mother. We don't see the reasons why her mother was scared of what people would think when Castillo got pregnant. Instead, we are led to believe that her mother was completely cold and uncaring, again and again, until Castillo politely told her not to contact her, and then suddenly two weeks later she was remorseful. People don't work like that. Interactions between people are complex, and that's what I want to see in a book, whether it's fiction or nonfiction. Instead, I think the author is giving us the idealized version of events where she is always the one in the right. These biased cracks in the narration are especially clear in instances like when she says her child's father's family "accused" her of being married when she met him and then says right after "I was married when I met him."
What makes these plot points harder to believe is that Castillo has the classic beginner writer's problem of telling instead of showing. There are no real scenes, so it reads like someone just rattling off their story next to you on a park bench. That might work for a 20-45 minute conversation with someone, but it does not work in a memoir. When she does throw in a quote here and there, it doesn't sound like something a person would actually say in real life, like when her young daughter says,
That sounds more like an adult giving a very matter-of-fact police statement than a child talking to her mother about a scary situation with an adult.
In other cases, the quotes not only sound unrealistic, but we have don't know the person well enough to feel much about them, such as when her daughter's father's new wife says,
We never hear about this woman before this point or after (although I didn't finish the book so who knows) and Hannah's father never had anything to do with her, nor did his family, so this woman's threat didn't actually make me scared for Hannah. I was more scared for her because of the life she was actually living with her mother. That was actually real; it was happening. This felt like it had no chance of happening. It was just over-the-top and unnecessary to the story besides, again, trying to evoke sympathy for the author.
I read 77 pages of this book, and I could probably write just as many pages on how awful this book was. I haven't felt this disappointed in a book in a long time. Possibly ever.
DNF 35%
I gave up on this book. I received a kindle version of it from a Goodreads giveaway, and I was excited to read it because of the subject matter and the great reviews on here. Now I'm wondering if I got the wrong book because this is one of the most poorly-written books I have ever come across.
First of all, there are glaring errors from the first page:
The traumas I have faced in my life included alcoholism, drug addition, rape, spousal abuse, betrayal, mental illness, cancer, and I have grappled with my own self-destructive tendencies.
These errors continue steadily throughout, from comma splices to run-on sentences. As a copy editor, I was cringing the entire time. It was ridiculous. Where was the editor for this book? Where was the copy editor? Where were the friends who could have given it a read-through before it was published? How did it get to this point with so many fixable mistakes?
However, even with the mistakes, I probably still could have gotten through the book if it had any redeeming qualities besides the potential to be a good story. I have read three memoirs in the past month (this one, An Unquiet Mind: A Memoir of Moods and Madness, and Relentless: How a Massive Stroke Changed My Life for the Better) and all of them were bodies with sturdy skeletons but no muscles to propel them forward and no skin to make them more appealing to the senses. These authors are the kind of people you meet, and when you talk to them and hear their stories, you say "Wow, that's incredible! You should write a book!" Easier said than done. We tend to think that an amazing story is what matters most, but that story is nothing without good (hell, even just decent will do sometimes) writing. The best writers can make the most mundane and ordinary stories exciting, but bad writers make the most amazing stories boring.
If Castillo really went through everything she says she did, I feel for her and I commend her for getting through it all and eventually living her best life. However, even with what little of this book I read, I found myself questioning her at every turn. For example, did she really send her infant on a plane alone? Is that even legal? And if it is (which I'm pretty sure it's not) how could she keep coming into the US without a passport?
When I wasn't trying to figure out the logistics of the situations Castillo kept getting herself into, I was confused about where she was at different points, both geographically and chronologically. For example, at one point in the book she mentions that her oldest child helps take care of both of her other kids, but at that point in the story, she only had two children and hadn't even mentioned that she eventually had another. Throw in all the times Castillo, her children, her family, and her ex change states, cities, houses, jobs, and countries, and you have a lot of confusion.
Furthermore, (and I hate to say this considering the subject matter of the book, but please hear me out) I had a hard time sympathizing with Castillo. It's not that I don't understand how serious addiction and abuse are and how they can both get you in situations you would never ordinarily be in and put your children in danger as well, even when you want to protect them. It's just that I don't feel like Castillo was as honest as she could have been. I can feel for a drug addict who has bought drugs instead of toys for their children--if I can see how they got to that point and if they own up to it. Castillo does not. Instead, she claims,
I didn't have the extra money to buy [her daughter, Hannah] anything...I would always have to repeat the painful truth. I told both of my children over and over again: "I'm sorry, sweetheart, but I don't have the money right now. I will work harder and hopefully buy things for you soon."
Castillo presents this as a fact; there was simply no money to spare. Yet, not even ten pages later, she casually states,
One day, after Peter came to the house, I left to go buy some cocaine, and when I didn't come back, my daughter called me to tell that Peter had left and gone home.
So not only was she quietly skirting around the fact that she did have extra money that could have gone toward her kids, but she also left her kids with a near stranger (He later buys a house for them to live in, and she mentions that she had known him for nine months at that point, and this was before that) who she also says (at the top of this same page) doesn't like and ignores her young daughter. All so she can go buy cocaine. And then that man leaves both of these children alone. I'm not sure how old her daughter was at this point because the timeline is confusing, but she mentions needing a babysitter for both of her kids around this time, so her daughter is not old enough to be alone or babysitting her brother.
Castillo never seems to fully grasp the horrible decisions she has made. Sometimes she will claim that she has apologized to her children (and of course, according to her, they tell her she was the best mom ever) or she mentions that she has ruined everything or that everything has gone downhill and that's it's all her fault, but it seems like she doesn't really believe it, that she wants readers to feel sorry for her or see her as the hopeless victim instead of as a person with flaws who has made some bad choices.
We never get to know Castillo or the other people in her life. Instead, we are shown situations with two cardboard cutouts. In the beginning, we see the cutouts of her family, the traditional, boring, judgmental people who only care about keeping up appearances. On the other side is Castillo, the unique spontaneous one who stands up to them all and doesn't care what they think. This pattern continues with slight alterations as the book continues. The unimaginative teacher who doesn't believe Castillo can make it out of her hometown against the adventurous young Castillo who leaves and does exactly what she set out to do, the unfair boss against the brave Castillo who gets what she's owed, the evil family and wife of her ex against Castillo, the mother who only wanted what was best for her daughter and trusted and loved too much, and so on and so forth.
There is no nuance or understanding of others, even when it comes to her own mother. We don't see the reasons why her mother was scared of what people would think when Castillo got pregnant. Instead, we are led to believe that her mother was completely cold and uncaring, again and again, until Castillo politely told her not to contact her, and then suddenly two weeks later she was remorseful. People don't work like that. Interactions between people are complex, and that's what I want to see in a book, whether it's fiction or nonfiction. Instead, I think the author is giving us the idealized version of events where she is always the one in the right. These biased cracks in the narration are especially clear in instances like when she says her child's father's family "accused" her of being married when she met him and then says right after "I was married when I met him."
What makes these plot points harder to believe is that Castillo has the classic beginner writer's problem of telling instead of showing. There are no real scenes, so it reads like someone just rattling off their story next to you on a park bench. That might work for a 20-45 minute conversation with someone, but it does not work in a memoir. When she does throw in a quote here and there, it doesn't sound like something a person would actually say in real life, like when her young daughter says,
Mom, David took the baby and me out in the car with him this morning. He was drinking a beer while he was driving. He drove to several houses to visit with his friends and left us in the car alone, waiting while he was inside. Then, on the way back to the house, he said to me, "Have you ever been touched by anyone?" and he placed his hand on my leg.
That sounds more like an adult giving a very matter-of-fact police statement than a child talking to her mother about a scary situation with an adult.
In other cases, the quotes not only sound unrealistic, but we have don't know the person well enough to feel much about them, such as when her daughter's father's new wife says,
I am Adam's wife. You are a bitch. Do you know what I'm going to do to you? I am going to take your daughter away from you. Then I am going to let every man alive fuck her anywhere, just like you were fucked. When they are done with her, I will give her away for adoption to someone who doesn't care about her or how much she's been fucked.
We never hear about this woman before this point or after (although I didn't finish the book so who knows) and Hannah's father never had anything to do with her, nor did his family, so this woman's threat didn't actually make me scared for Hannah. I was more scared for her because of the life she was actually living with her mother. That was actually real; it was happening. This felt like it had no chance of happening. It was just over-the-top and unnecessary to the story besides, again, trying to evoke sympathy for the author.
I read 77 pages of this book, and I could probably write just as many pages on how awful this book was. I haven't felt this disappointed in a book in a long time. Possibly ever.
July 4, 2018
Reviewed by Deborah Lloyd for Readers' Favorite
Alba Castillo shares her story of survival in her memoir, Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For? She was born and raised in a small village outside of Madrid, Spain; she knew she could not stay there. As an adolescent, she moved to England twice, but her efforts at finding a good job were thwarted by the fact she never had a work permit for England and was only allowed to work as an au pair at that point and time. Eventually, she found her way to the United States. Her relationships with three different men over the years resulted in three children and taking care of these children was always her main focus. Peter, the father of her third child, had mental health diagnoses and eventually succeeded in taking this daughter away from her. She admits to making choices that sabotaged a healthy and happy life. Yet, she always survived. This life of severe emotional abuse, four separate bouts of cancer and the loss of her daughter is realistically portrayed in this thought-provoking book.
The author’s writing style is direct and honest. The reader is easily engaged in the ups and downs of Castillo's life and supports her efforts to overcome the obstacles placed before her. Castillo does not make excuses for her choices, but rather she presents the short-term, and long-term, consequences of them. This is one of the most important aspects of the book, especially for people who find themselves in unhealthy, co-dependent relationships. Citing the high level of stress that she lived under for years as a possible cause, or contributing cause, to her cancer is another essential message. Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For? by Alba Castillo is an unforgettable and insightful work.
Alba Castillo shares her story of survival in her memoir, Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For? She was born and raised in a small village outside of Madrid, Spain; she knew she could not stay there. As an adolescent, she moved to England twice, but her efforts at finding a good job were thwarted by the fact she never had a work permit for England and was only allowed to work as an au pair at that point and time. Eventually, she found her way to the United States. Her relationships with three different men over the years resulted in three children and taking care of these children was always her main focus. Peter, the father of her third child, had mental health diagnoses and eventually succeeded in taking this daughter away from her. She admits to making choices that sabotaged a healthy and happy life. Yet, she always survived. This life of severe emotional abuse, four separate bouts of cancer and the loss of her daughter is realistically portrayed in this thought-provoking book.
The author’s writing style is direct and honest. The reader is easily engaged in the ups and downs of Castillo's life and supports her efforts to overcome the obstacles placed before her. Castillo does not make excuses for her choices, but rather she presents the short-term, and long-term, consequences of them. This is one of the most important aspects of the book, especially for people who find themselves in unhealthy, co-dependent relationships. Citing the high level of stress that she lived under for years as a possible cause, or contributing cause, to her cancer is another essential message. Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For? by Alba Castillo is an unforgettable and insightful work.
June 23, 2018
Intense and gut-wrenching, Alba Castillo’s memoir, Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For?, presents the experiences of a Spanish woman whose fight for survival is inspiring. At a young age, Alba was always a dreamer, quite restless and with a thrill for adventure. She dreamed of what life would be like beyond her small hometown of Santa Ynez, Spain. Her dream came true one day. She finally got the opportunity to leave her home behind and go to Madrid and then to London. But life there was not exactly what she had imagined and soon enough she was back to searching for a place to call home. Her life would turn out to be a journey in which she would have to battle domestic violence, drug addiction, four bouts of cancer, the loss of a daughter to a self-seeking man, and unfathomable emotional pain.
Malice Intent’s narrative is laced with many lessons and invaluable advice. Alba Castillo balances emotional provocation and the narration of scenes. She articulates the purpose of the book impressively. Along the way, Alba’s grit in the midst of her mistakes became the source of hope for me that, despite everything, she would still pull through. Malice Intent’s pace is steady and this is achieved by the compactness of the narrative. Alba’s perspective is also clearly expressed. Writing is free-flowing, with a peek at the present covered in the epilogue. In the background, the story sheds light on the struggles of single parenthood, drug addiction, illness and the torment of domestic abuse.
Malice Intent’s narrative is laced with many lessons and invaluable advice. Alba Castillo balances emotional provocation and the narration of scenes. She articulates the purpose of the book impressively. Along the way, Alba’s grit in the midst of her mistakes became the source of hope for me that, despite everything, she would still pull through. Malice Intent’s pace is steady and this is achieved by the compactness of the narrative. Alba’s perspective is also clearly expressed. Writing is free-flowing, with a peek at the present covered in the epilogue. In the background, the story sheds light on the struggles of single parenthood, drug addiction, illness and the torment of domestic abuse.
June 3, 2018
Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For? by Alba Castillo is the author's memoir surrounding a life that began in Spain, but took her through several different countries as she pursued a better life as a single mother, usually with results that were rarely better. Castillo was raised in an isolated environment that was, by most standards, rural and anomalous. She was unable to finish secondary/high school after being guilted out of going by her well-intended but overbearing mother, and eventually sought work abroad. Initially accepting employment as an au par, Castillo was forced into varied forms of slavery, but found refuge at the gym, eventually becoming a personal trainer. Her journey went via rocky paths that could crush the strongest of individuals (single motherhood, abandonment, immigration and legal issues, drugs and alcohol, abuse, cancer...it just goes on and on), but she comes out ahead and is now ready to share her story with the world.
Malice Intent by Alba Castillo is a heartbreaking tale that ultimately details the resilience of women. I think a lot of times American immigration and refugee stories, particularly those told by single mothers and women seeking better opportunities on their own, don't get the recognition they deserve. The fact that Castillo survived odds that were stacked deeply against her on almost every front shows perseverance and fortitude in and of itself; but the fact that she did this as a single mother, without the legal benefits afforded to many in the states, and in the face of hardship - without English as a primary language - is almost miraculous. I'd recommend this story of everyday heroism to anyone looking for an inspiring read, and all the women out there in situations that feel beyond their control, who need to be reassured that there is a way out.
Review written for Readers' Favorite.
Malice Intent by Alba Castillo is a heartbreaking tale that ultimately details the resilience of women. I think a lot of times American immigration and refugee stories, particularly those told by single mothers and women seeking better opportunities on their own, don't get the recognition they deserve. The fact that Castillo survived odds that were stacked deeply against her on almost every front shows perseverance and fortitude in and of itself; but the fact that she did this as a single mother, without the legal benefits afforded to many in the states, and in the face of hardship - without English as a primary language - is almost miraculous. I'd recommend this story of everyday heroism to anyone looking for an inspiring read, and all the women out there in situations that feel beyond their control, who need to be reassured that there is a way out.
Review written for Readers' Favorite.
Want to read
July 26, 2018#GoodreadsGiveaway
July 29, 2018
Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For? by Alba Castillo is the true story of a warrior, a survivor, and a woman who beat the odds to restore her dignity. Alba Castillo is born in Santa Ynez, a little village on the suburbs of Madrid. Driven by the desire to live a better life and to see better prospects, she travels to England where she learns English and then quickly finds herself in the United Sates. It’s in the US that her descent into hell begins. She gets into drugs and booze, experiences domestic and spousal abuse, betrayal, and cancer. She loses her youngest daughter to an abusive father. But how did she survive all this? How did she get to triumph over her self-destructive behaviors? This story shares secrets on how she trumped death and survived the worst, including painful cancer treatments and how she found the strength to love herself.
This is a beautiful story, raw and inspiring; it’s a story about resilience and courage. Alba Castillo may write in a clear and compelling voice, but it’s the ruthless honesty in the narrative that seduced me. The writing is beautiful and I loved the way the author allows the emotional and psychological implications of the story to come out. The theme of making wrong choices comes out brilliantly in the narrative and readers get the strong message that we are victims of our choices. Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For? is a book about what the protagonist learned about inner strength and freedom and what her painful journey has taught her. You’ll find tools to beat self-destructive habits, make wise decisions in relationships, and find the strength to stand up for yourself.
This is a beautiful story, raw and inspiring; it’s a story about resilience and courage. Alba Castillo may write in a clear and compelling voice, but it’s the ruthless honesty in the narrative that seduced me. The writing is beautiful and I loved the way the author allows the emotional and psychological implications of the story to come out. The theme of making wrong choices comes out brilliantly in the narrative and readers get the strong message that we are victims of our choices. Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For? is a book about what the protagonist learned about inner strength and freedom and what her painful journey has taught her. You’ll find tools to beat self-destructive habits, make wise decisions in relationships, and find the strength to stand up for yourself.
July 4, 2018
Reviewed by Ankita Shukla for Readers' Favorite
There is nothing worse than being alone. Is there? After reading the memoir of Alba Castillo, I know there is something way worse than being alone; being in a relationship and still feeling lonely, used, disrespected, and rejected wins the Oscar of being in the worst situation ever. The author has presented the unfiltered truth of her life in her autobiography Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For? Alba Castillo was born in a place where the future of women was predetermined by society; they were to get married and raise a family -- nothing less and nothing more. However, she rebelled against the norm and created her own destiny. Although writing her own destiny and all sounds extremely fascinating, her life remained anything but. She became a single parent very early in her life and the men with whom she considered herself to be in a relationship used her for their own selfish reasons. In her tendency to give people more chances than they deserve, she ended up losing everything she had. At the time when she was diagnosed with cancer, she found herself driving to and from her multiple appointments all alone even though she was in a years-long relationship with a man at the time. How can someone be in a committed relationship, living with their partner and yet remain a single parent? You will know the answer once you read this heart-breaking memoir.
Having read Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For, I know one thing with utmost certainty: Alba Castillo is a fighter. She is a mother who never allowed her monetary problems to become an obstacle in doing the right thing for her kids. Her circumstances did not permit her to grant each of their wishes, but despite everything standing in her way, she ensured that her kids got what's most important in life. It's tragically funny how love worked both in favor and against her. The love that she felt for her children kept her fighting and in survival mode at all times. At the same time, however, the love she felt towards her partner shattered her heart and destroyed her life. The author has no malice intent behind writing this book. The only thing that she expects to achieve by revealing every fact, no matter how dark, is to convey to readers is that it's best to wrap up an abusive relationship as soon as you notice a red flag. Do not be blind in love and try not to suffer in silence. The moment you realize that your partner is not respectful towards you or is manipulative or in any way abusive to you, head for the exit.
Other than highlighting the impact of an abusive relationship on a person's heart, will, and life, the author has tried to inject faith in her readers. No matter how hard the circumstances are, if you have faith and determination, help will come and you will survive. When giving up is not an option, prepare your mind for a battle where losing is not an option. I have learned a lot from her life and her endless courage. Whether you are a fighter or a crybaby, you will definitely learn a lot from her life. I would encourage every reader to read Malice Intent with an open mind, celebrate the strong lady that Alba Castillo is, and quit suffering in an abusive relationship.
The same review can be found on my blog: https://mojitowithatwist.com
There is nothing worse than being alone. Is there? After reading the memoir of Alba Castillo, I know there is something way worse than being alone; being in a relationship and still feeling lonely, used, disrespected, and rejected wins the Oscar of being in the worst situation ever. The author has presented the unfiltered truth of her life in her autobiography Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For? Alba Castillo was born in a place where the future of women was predetermined by society; they were to get married and raise a family -- nothing less and nothing more. However, she rebelled against the norm and created her own destiny. Although writing her own destiny and all sounds extremely fascinating, her life remained anything but. She became a single parent very early in her life and the men with whom she considered herself to be in a relationship used her for their own selfish reasons. In her tendency to give people more chances than they deserve, she ended up losing everything she had. At the time when she was diagnosed with cancer, she found herself driving to and from her multiple appointments all alone even though she was in a years-long relationship with a man at the time. How can someone be in a committed relationship, living with their partner and yet remain a single parent? You will know the answer once you read this heart-breaking memoir.
Having read Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For, I know one thing with utmost certainty: Alba Castillo is a fighter. She is a mother who never allowed her monetary problems to become an obstacle in doing the right thing for her kids. Her circumstances did not permit her to grant each of their wishes, but despite everything standing in her way, she ensured that her kids got what's most important in life. It's tragically funny how love worked both in favor and against her. The love that she felt for her children kept her fighting and in survival mode at all times. At the same time, however, the love she felt towards her partner shattered her heart and destroyed her life. The author has no malice intent behind writing this book. The only thing that she expects to achieve by revealing every fact, no matter how dark, is to convey to readers is that it's best to wrap up an abusive relationship as soon as you notice a red flag. Do not be blind in love and try not to suffer in silence. The moment you realize that your partner is not respectful towards you or is manipulative or in any way abusive to you, head for the exit.
Other than highlighting the impact of an abusive relationship on a person's heart, will, and life, the author has tried to inject faith in her readers. No matter how hard the circumstances are, if you have faith and determination, help will come and you will survive. When giving up is not an option, prepare your mind for a battle where losing is not an option. I have learned a lot from her life and her endless courage. Whether you are a fighter or a crybaby, you will definitely learn a lot from her life. I would encourage every reader to read Malice Intent with an open mind, celebrate the strong lady that Alba Castillo is, and quit suffering in an abusive relationship.
The same review can be found on my blog: https://mojitowithatwist.com
August 25, 2018
Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For? is Alba Castillo’s true account of her life and harrowing experiences of successive involvements with abusive partners. Alba’s father treated her mother badly and this experience became the root cause of her later unconscious tendency to choose men who turned out to be manipulative, belittling and cruel. Always capable and independent, Alba rejected her mother’s wishes for her to marry locally and devote herself to being a wife and mother. Determined to find her own way and make her own decisions, Alba moved away and worked hard to support herself – particularly once she became a mother to three children by three different fathers. The strain of enduring the abuse led her to alcoholism and drug addiction at one point. Her husband’s lies led to the court order that removed their daughter from her care. But Alba’s love and concern for the safety of her children and her determination to beat the cancer that tormented her physically and mentally drives her onwards with faith, a remarkable resourcefulness and willingness to overcome the chains of her past.
Alba Castillo’s story is an admirably brave and honest account that draws attention to the plight of the abused and the incredibly difficult task they may have in breaking patterns of behavior that unconsciously draw them to yet more abusive relationships. Malice Intent is an eye-opener for many as it reveals the pain and frustration that accompanies the author’s reflections and regrets. Castillo states that she has written this book in order to help other victims to help themselves, and to realize that staying in an abusive relationship will harm and pass on effects to children with the danger that the cycle will be repeated again. The story shows that developing self-insight is so often not enough to escape such relationships; the author describes the co-dependency so well.
Malice Intent is a well-written book that moves with detail, but at the same time a good pace, through the author’s life to date. People and situations are described with clarity - I began to feel I knew the various real life characters mentioned - and readers will be rooting for Alba and her children from the start. More than autobiographical, this book has an honesty, courage, empathy and vulnerability that make it an enlightenment and inspiration to others. Alba Castillo eventually learns to put herself and her loved ones first, to forgive herself for her mistakes and to never give up on making life better. (Review based on review copy/edition).
Alba Castillo’s story is an admirably brave and honest account that draws attention to the plight of the abused and the incredibly difficult task they may have in breaking patterns of behavior that unconsciously draw them to yet more abusive relationships. Malice Intent is an eye-opener for many as it reveals the pain and frustration that accompanies the author’s reflections and regrets. Castillo states that she has written this book in order to help other victims to help themselves, and to realize that staying in an abusive relationship will harm and pass on effects to children with the danger that the cycle will be repeated again. The story shows that developing self-insight is so often not enough to escape such relationships; the author describes the co-dependency so well.
Malice Intent is a well-written book that moves with detail, but at the same time a good pace, through the author’s life to date. People and situations are described with clarity - I began to feel I knew the various real life characters mentioned - and readers will be rooting for Alba and her children from the start. More than autobiographical, this book has an honesty, courage, empathy and vulnerability that make it an enlightenment and inspiration to others. Alba Castillo eventually learns to put herself and her loved ones first, to forgive herself for her mistakes and to never give up on making life better. (Review based on review copy/edition).
June 28, 2018
Reviewed For Readers' Favorite by Grant Leishman
For those of us fortunate and blessed to be brought up in a loving, protective and supportive family, it is sometimes difficult to understand that is not always the case for everyone. In Malice Intent, Alba Castillo shows us what potential disasters can confront us when we make poor decisions in life, for ourselves and those we love. Born in the small town of Santa Ynez in Spain to a strict Catholic family, Alba was a rebel from the beginning. Determined to break free from the life that seemed pre-planned for her in Santa Ynez, she left home early, to begin what seems like an aimless trek to find herself and her future. Pregnancy and motherhood did not dampen Alba’s desire to search for her destiny, but it was when she moved to America that her life truly fell apart and she began to spiral down in the depths of her own personal hell, which would include; domestic abuse, drug and alcohol addiction, illness, and a morbid desire to self-sabotage. Working her way through her travails and pain, she finally came to the one immutable conclusion; that the only person capable of changing our destiny is ourselves and that the power to do so is inside of all of us.
Malice Intent is a powerful book that explores some nasty and horrible topics, but partly because it is done through the prism of both the perpetrator and, indeed, the victim; the Author Alba Castillo, it is one that is both readable and insightful. Despite a large part of the story reading like one enormous “pity party” and a litany of horrors, what comes through loud and clear is the acceptance that we are the master of our own lives and we have to take control of what we can control; that we all have the power within ourselves to change our own future. I particularly appreciated the author’s courage to put her dysfunctional life out there in the open, for all to see. I have no doubt writing this was cathartic for the author, but equally it stands as a beacon of hope for others in a similar situation. The author’s writing style is plain, simple, and no-holds barred. She tells it like it is and opens her life, her decisions and her mistakes up for our examination and perhaps even judgement. This was an extremely easy book to read and one that would be of immense benefit to anyone who has experienced abuse or addiction in their lives. It is a timely reminder that; “there but for the grace of God, go I” and I would highly recommend reading it.
For those of us fortunate and blessed to be brought up in a loving, protective and supportive family, it is sometimes difficult to understand that is not always the case for everyone. In Malice Intent, Alba Castillo shows us what potential disasters can confront us when we make poor decisions in life, for ourselves and those we love. Born in the small town of Santa Ynez in Spain to a strict Catholic family, Alba was a rebel from the beginning. Determined to break free from the life that seemed pre-planned for her in Santa Ynez, she left home early, to begin what seems like an aimless trek to find herself and her future. Pregnancy and motherhood did not dampen Alba’s desire to search for her destiny, but it was when she moved to America that her life truly fell apart and she began to spiral down in the depths of her own personal hell, which would include; domestic abuse, drug and alcohol addiction, illness, and a morbid desire to self-sabotage. Working her way through her travails and pain, she finally came to the one immutable conclusion; that the only person capable of changing our destiny is ourselves and that the power to do so is inside of all of us.
Malice Intent is a powerful book that explores some nasty and horrible topics, but partly because it is done through the prism of both the perpetrator and, indeed, the victim; the Author Alba Castillo, it is one that is both readable and insightful. Despite a large part of the story reading like one enormous “pity party” and a litany of horrors, what comes through loud and clear is the acceptance that we are the master of our own lives and we have to take control of what we can control; that we all have the power within ourselves to change our own future. I particularly appreciated the author’s courage to put her dysfunctional life out there in the open, for all to see. I have no doubt writing this was cathartic for the author, but equally it stands as a beacon of hope for others in a similar situation. The author’s writing style is plain, simple, and no-holds barred. She tells it like it is and opens her life, her decisions and her mistakes up for our examination and perhaps even judgement. This was an extremely easy book to read and one that would be of immense benefit to anyone who has experienced abuse or addiction in their lives. It is a timely reminder that; “there but for the grace of God, go I” and I would highly recommend reading it.
June 25, 2018
In Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For? by Alba Castillo, Alba always knew that she was the black sheep of her family, while growing up in the small village of Santa Ynez, close to Madrid. She always knew that her life would be different to those of her siblings, who dreamt of getting married and raising a family in the village. As soon as Alba turned 18 years old, she left for England and this is where her journey begins. Alba met her first husband in England and although happy, the union was short-lived. Alba wanted to feel that rush of love and excitement which she found in her next two relationships. However, the men were not all they seemed, and hidden beneath the charm was a dark side, that included physical and mental torture and rape. She found an escape route from the painful reality of her life through alcohol and cocaine. When she met Peter, Alba believed that he would be the one person to love her, but the happiness soon turned to psychological torture. Then she discovered she had cancer. Alba continued her battle to provide for her children, and always found a way to make their lives as normal as possible. She never expected that while she was fighting cancer, there would be a traumatic custody battle, and the shocking news that one of her children was being abused. This gripping true story will inspire you to be the strongest and best version of your self.
This book is written with a brutal honesty that will make you ask the question, ‘Will this woman ever be given a break?’ I thought Alba described each event with such vividness that you felt you were living the experience with her. Although her life became one of emotional and mental abuse, she kept striving and pushing forward, even when all the odds were against her, and this is admirable. The section concerning her cancer treatment and the custody battle for her youngest daughter affected me the most. Throughout the book, Alba does not complain or wallow in self-pity, and that is why this book is so special. You will discover the strength of the human character, and when she had no one to turn to and nowhere to go, Alba always found a way to provide for her children. A true inspiration to us all. My favourite quote from the book is, ‘Life does not have to be complicated,’ which is very true.
This book is written with a brutal honesty that will make you ask the question, ‘Will this woman ever be given a break?’ I thought Alba described each event with such vividness that you felt you were living the experience with her. Although her life became one of emotional and mental abuse, she kept striving and pushing forward, even when all the odds were against her, and this is admirable. The section concerning her cancer treatment and the custody battle for her youngest daughter affected me the most. Throughout the book, Alba does not complain or wallow in self-pity, and that is why this book is so special. You will discover the strength of the human character, and when she had no one to turn to and nowhere to go, Alba always found a way to provide for her children. A true inspiration to us all. My favourite quote from the book is, ‘Life does not have to be complicated,’ which is very true.
July 7, 2018
Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For? by Alba Castillo is the true story of a warrior, a survivor, and a woman who beat the odds to restore her dignity. Alba Castillo is born in Santa Ynez, a little village on the suburbs of Madrid. Driven by the desire to live a better life and to see better prospects, she travels to England where she learns English and then quickly finds herself in the United Sates. It’s in the US that her descent into hell begins. She gets into drugs and booze, experiences domestic and spousal abuse, betrayal, and cancer. She loses her youngest daughter to an abusive father. But how did she survive all this? How did she get to triumph over her self-destructive behaviors? This story shares secrets on how she trumped death and survived the worst, including painful cancer treatments and how she found the strength to love herself.
This is a beautiful story, raw and inspiring; it’s a story about resilience and courage. Alba Castillo may write in a clear and compelling voice, but it’s the ruthless honesty in the narrative that seduced me. The writing is beautiful and I loved the way the author allows the emotional and psychological implications of the story to come out. The theme of making wrong choices comes out brilliantly in the narrative and readers get the strong message that we are victims of our choices. Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For? is a book about what the protagonist learned about inner strength and freedom and what her painful journey has taught her. You’ll find tools to beat self-destructive habits, make wise decisions in relationships, and find the strength to stand up for yourself.
This is a beautiful story, raw and inspiring; it’s a story about resilience and courage. Alba Castillo may write in a clear and compelling voice, but it’s the ruthless honesty in the narrative that seduced me. The writing is beautiful and I loved the way the author allows the emotional and psychological implications of the story to come out. The theme of making wrong choices comes out brilliantly in the narrative and readers get the strong message that we are victims of our choices. Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For? is a book about what the protagonist learned about inner strength and freedom and what her painful journey has taught her. You’ll find tools to beat self-destructive habits, make wise decisions in relationships, and find the strength to stand up for yourself.
August 23, 2016
Sometimes life can become such a nightmare that we are unable to see past the hurt—or even reach out for help. This could be due to pride, fear of judgment or retaliation, or loss of friends or family. Whatever the reason, it isolates those who most need help.
In the memoir, Malice Intent, Castillo shares her ordeals with surprising candor and detail. From the opening pages, we slide from the author's comparatively normal life into one of disappointment, despair and uncertainty as she dons the oppressive yoke of an undereducated, single mother--and one of an abused woman.
Her self-destructive tendency to choose abusive partners takes its toll, and Castillo falls into the traps of emotional paralysis, peace-at-any-price, and escape through drug abuse.
It’s a tale of deep suffering, seeming at times at mid-book like a rant of frustration and hopelessness. I would urge the reader to work through it, though, because her journey is revealing and courageous, and it serves as an aching reminder that as parents, we must be strong enough to remove our children from abusive environments, no matter how high the cost seems at the time.
Castillo’s contribution with this novel is to further our understanding of the signs of abuse. Her valiant fight to save her daughter should be a clear and constant reminder for us, as we observe our friends and neighbors, and for all the legal and social agencies to remain vigilant in their efforts to protect the children. The author understands her mistakes, and tries to send a message of hope to other women in similar predicaments.
Her book has a powerful message. I would recommend an addendum to the book of a list of agencies—and their contact information—so future victims can find it a little easier to locate help.
In the memoir, Malice Intent, Castillo shares her ordeals with surprising candor and detail. From the opening pages, we slide from the author's comparatively normal life into one of disappointment, despair and uncertainty as she dons the oppressive yoke of an undereducated, single mother--and one of an abused woman.
Her self-destructive tendency to choose abusive partners takes its toll, and Castillo falls into the traps of emotional paralysis, peace-at-any-price, and escape through drug abuse.
It’s a tale of deep suffering, seeming at times at mid-book like a rant of frustration and hopelessness. I would urge the reader to work through it, though, because her journey is revealing and courageous, and it serves as an aching reminder that as parents, we must be strong enough to remove our children from abusive environments, no matter how high the cost seems at the time.
Castillo’s contribution with this novel is to further our understanding of the signs of abuse. Her valiant fight to save her daughter should be a clear and constant reminder for us, as we observe our friends and neighbors, and for all the legal and social agencies to remain vigilant in their efforts to protect the children. The author understands her mistakes, and tries to send a message of hope to other women in similar predicaments.
Her book has a powerful message. I would recommend an addendum to the book of a list of agencies—and their contact information—so future victims can find it a little easier to locate help.
June 25, 2018
--Reviewed for Readers Favorite
Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For? by Alba Castillo is an autobiography by Alba on her life from her childhood to present. In Malice Intent, Alba details her early years in the small town of Santa Ynez in Spain where everyone knew everyone and her family life there, her move out of town to study English, her life working various jobs in England and elsewhere, her marriages and children, her relationships with men which included abusive relationships, her long relationship and marriage with Peter and how it affected and caused family dysfunction, her long battle with cancer including a mastectomy, ongoing chemotherapy, radiation therapy, etc. and all of the financial hardships associated with this. Alba also writes about her experiences in court and the custody and upbringing of her children.
Although Malice Intent is definitely a story of struggle and strife, Alba writes very candidly and openly about her life, and provides a voice of hope and resilience throughout it all. At times, she is not afraid to admit her own failings or mistakes. The part about her relationships with men has been portrayed in a very real and authentic manner, and it seems as real and believable as if she were sitting across the room and telling it. One thing that comes across is how Alba always put her children as high priority and made sure they were as well taken care of as possible even during all of this. I appreciated this and feel it is so important for others in similar situations to at least make sure the children are protected from harm, sexual abuse or anything of that kind. This is well worth a read!
Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For? by Alba Castillo is an autobiography by Alba on her life from her childhood to present. In Malice Intent, Alba details her early years in the small town of Santa Ynez in Spain where everyone knew everyone and her family life there, her move out of town to study English, her life working various jobs in England and elsewhere, her marriages and children, her relationships with men which included abusive relationships, her long relationship and marriage with Peter and how it affected and caused family dysfunction, her long battle with cancer including a mastectomy, ongoing chemotherapy, radiation therapy, etc. and all of the financial hardships associated with this. Alba also writes about her experiences in court and the custody and upbringing of her children.
Although Malice Intent is definitely a story of struggle and strife, Alba writes very candidly and openly about her life, and provides a voice of hope and resilience throughout it all. At times, she is not afraid to admit her own failings or mistakes. The part about her relationships with men has been portrayed in a very real and authentic manner, and it seems as real and believable as if she were sitting across the room and telling it. One thing that comes across is how Alba always put her children as high priority and made sure they were as well taken care of as possible even during all of this. I appreciated this and feel it is so important for others in similar situations to at least make sure the children are protected from harm, sexual abuse or anything of that kind. This is well worth a read!
July 3, 2018
Castillo’s moving memoir, Malice Intent, takes the reader on a lifelong journey of survival and lessons learned the hard way. Born in the village of Santa Ynez, near Madrid, Spain, Castillo rebels against the customs of dating, getting married, and settling down with a boy from the village. Instead, she travels to England and works there illegally. On her return to Madrid, Castillo meets and marries a U.S Air Force soldier, but the relationship is not to be. A brief romance with a freeloading model ends with Castillo becoming a single mother and moving to the U.S. with her daughter, Hannah. Being a single parent comes with its own challenges, which Castillo bravely faces as she navigates financial hardship and neglectful child minders.
Castillo writes with honesty and courage about her abusive past relationships. Castillo refrains from detailing all the subtle psychological conditioning abusers use on their victims in her early relationships, but an informed reader can clearly track the sequence of events threaded through this aspect of Malice Intent. It’s a sad fact that many women, and men, will recognise the behavioural patterns involved and identify with the minor dissociation Castillo touches on. Unfortunately, it doesn’t sufficiently illuminate the complex toxicity of abusive relationships or the effects of prolonged gaslighting, a manipulative tactic that an abuser uses. For this reason, Castillo’s willingness to believe in and forgive Peter can be difficult to read. Malice Intent is both brave and heartfelt, and challenging to read because of this.
Reviewed for Reader's Favorite
Castillo writes with honesty and courage about her abusive past relationships. Castillo refrains from detailing all the subtle psychological conditioning abusers use on their victims in her early relationships, but an informed reader can clearly track the sequence of events threaded through this aspect of Malice Intent. It’s a sad fact that many women, and men, will recognise the behavioural patterns involved and identify with the minor dissociation Castillo touches on. Unfortunately, it doesn’t sufficiently illuminate the complex toxicity of abusive relationships or the effects of prolonged gaslighting, a manipulative tactic that an abuser uses. For this reason, Castillo’s willingness to believe in and forgive Peter can be difficult to read. Malice Intent is both brave and heartfelt, and challenging to read because of this.
Reviewed for Reader's Favorite
July 3, 2018
Reviewed by Joel R. Dennstedt for Readers' Favorite
Malice Intent by Alba Castillo is a train wreck of a story, or a heroic account of one woman’s struggle to overcome an abuse-filled life. The book can be read in two ways, depending on the personal experience and perspective of the reader. The author is intent on establishing the more heroic narrative, but she is candid, detailed, and precise enough to also establish doubt. The book has been lauded by most as a tale about surmounting horrendous odds in order to prevail. Ms. Castillo, however, has supplied enough ammunition, if desired, to shoot her own story down and reinterpret it as a cautionary tale about indulging in unbelievable and repetitive mistakes. The most conclusive statement one can make is that this emotionally wrought confessional is real and raw and relevant. Also, that it radiates emphatic immediacy. And it is very well written.
Alba Castillo’s necessarily self-centered viewpoint in Malice Intent tends to favor her own harsh assessments of her worst antagonists, and often to mitigate the selfishness behind her personal motivations, but to be entirely fair, she never refrains from letting the reader see these personal “moles and warts.” And none of this detracts from the force of reality and authenticity behind her hard and dangerous life encounters. In fact, she writes like one in shock, as hammered and confused by her own repetitive behavior as she is by her betrayers and abusers. Therein lies an immense value behind an ultimately courageous and naked revelation: Watch me suffer my wretched train wreck, but learn an important lesson by how I struggled out. For that, the book is indeed heroic.
Malice Intent by Alba Castillo is a train wreck of a story, or a heroic account of one woman’s struggle to overcome an abuse-filled life. The book can be read in two ways, depending on the personal experience and perspective of the reader. The author is intent on establishing the more heroic narrative, but she is candid, detailed, and precise enough to also establish doubt. The book has been lauded by most as a tale about surmounting horrendous odds in order to prevail. Ms. Castillo, however, has supplied enough ammunition, if desired, to shoot her own story down and reinterpret it as a cautionary tale about indulging in unbelievable and repetitive mistakes. The most conclusive statement one can make is that this emotionally wrought confessional is real and raw and relevant. Also, that it radiates emphatic immediacy. And it is very well written.
Alba Castillo’s necessarily self-centered viewpoint in Malice Intent tends to favor her own harsh assessments of her worst antagonists, and often to mitigate the selfishness behind her personal motivations, but to be entirely fair, she never refrains from letting the reader see these personal “moles and warts.” And none of this detracts from the force of reality and authenticity behind her hard and dangerous life encounters. In fact, she writes like one in shock, as hammered and confused by her own repetitive behavior as she is by her betrayers and abusers. Therein lies an immense value behind an ultimately courageous and naked revelation: Watch me suffer my wretched train wreck, but learn an important lesson by how I struggled out. For that, the book is indeed heroic.
June 24, 2018
Reviewed by Rabia Tanveer for Readers' Favorite
Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For? by Alba Castillo is the story of a woman who left her village for a better life, only to realize that life is often not what you want it to be. Alba left her family and village to move to England. After learning English, she soon moved to America and started a phase of her life that she never could have imagined in her wildest dreams. She met two men who changed her life drastically. One man introduced her to the world of alcoholism/drugs and the other introduced her to a world of pain and disappointments. It was all she could do to keep her family intact, but a new bomb was dropped on her. She was diagnosed with breast cancer. However, she is a warrior so she fought through several rounds of treatment, while at the same time working hard to keep her family intact.
This is the story of a strong woman who had faith in herself and was tough enough to fight the world. This is a great read. It is truly inspiring how Alba was able to get up every day and not curl into a fetal position. She is a fighter and a strong writer. She did her story justice by writing it in such a powerful manner. You can feel the despair, emotions, and her happiness in her words. There is nothing you can find at fault here. She is a true heroine, and she happens to be a very talented writer. I seriously admire her.
Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For? by Alba Castillo is the story of a woman who left her village for a better life, only to realize that life is often not what you want it to be. Alba left her family and village to move to England. After learning English, she soon moved to America and started a phase of her life that she never could have imagined in her wildest dreams. She met two men who changed her life drastically. One man introduced her to the world of alcoholism/drugs and the other introduced her to a world of pain and disappointments. It was all she could do to keep her family intact, but a new bomb was dropped on her. She was diagnosed with breast cancer. However, she is a warrior so she fought through several rounds of treatment, while at the same time working hard to keep her family intact.
This is the story of a strong woman who had faith in herself and was tough enough to fight the world. This is a great read. It is truly inspiring how Alba was able to get up every day and not curl into a fetal position. She is a fighter and a strong writer. She did her story justice by writing it in such a powerful manner. You can feel the despair, emotions, and her happiness in her words. There is nothing you can find at fault here. She is a true heroine, and she happens to be a very talented writer. I seriously admire her.
November 14, 2018
A heartfelt biography, written in clear, straightforward language, of a woman who took the huge step of leaving her tiny Spanish village where everybody knew her and launching herself on a wide world with little in the way of academic qualifications or street savvy. They say Fortune Favors the Brave, but sadly, not in this case. I read with growing dismay how a life can spiral downward through meeting and being attracted to the wrong people. I hesitate to call it a page-turner in the usual sense and I also hesitate to say that I ‘enjoyed’ reading about somebody else’s descent into misery and poor health through abuse, but it is certainly a compelling read. In fact, I read more than half the book in the first sitting - and this is not my usual genre. If you like biography and autobiography, I am sure you will like this book. There’s a lot to think about and for those who have encountered (or are encountering) similar problems in their lives, hopefully the birds-eye view this book provides will give some food for thought. Well done to Alba for her courage in putting her experiences in writing for the benefit of others. I received this book free as an ARC reader in return for an honest review.
October 15, 2018
Interesting
Interesting and moving read. Frustrated that it took her so long to stop giving in to all these bad people in her life, but i definitely understand why. Very lucky that she has missed out on so much treatments and still managed to get somewhat under Control the cancer. This all reminds me of my marriage to my ex husband who was also a very big narcassist... And still is. Wishing the author the very best in everything.
Interesting and moving read. Frustrated that it took her so long to stop giving in to all these bad people in her life, but i definitely understand why. Very lucky that she has missed out on so much treatments and still managed to get somewhat under Control the cancer. This all reminds me of my marriage to my ex husband who was also a very big narcassist... And still is. Wishing the author the very best in everything.
April 2, 2019
Ummm
Though it is clear the author has been through a tremendous amount of pain her weighting is so disjointed it takes away from her message. The whole book was all over the place making the time line, plot, and story itself hard to fallow. I do feel for the women but she is definitely not a future author to follow. The best I can say is, if you can read past the grammar and inconsistency, she became a true fighter.
Though it is clear the author has been through a tremendous amount of pain her weighting is so disjointed it takes away from her message. The whole book was all over the place making the time line, plot, and story itself hard to fallow. I do feel for the women but she is definitely not a future author to follow. The best I can say is, if you can read past the grammar and inconsistency, she became a true fighter.
January 10, 2024
This book is very difficult for me to rate for a number of reasons. The writing really was not very good and at times Alba's story felt like it became very repetitive and drawn out, but the conclusion is what really made the book.
If a reader is able to take a step back and realize that the author isn't a professional writer but was simply writing Malice Intent in order to share her story and hopefully prevent others from making similar mistakes, this book can be very enjoyable (as enjoyable as reading about someone else's hardships can be at least). I do think there were a lot of specific retellings presented in the book that could have been omitted to make things flow smoother. I also noticed a lot of spelling and grammar mistakes which unfortunately took away from the story in the beginning. If you are willing to tough it out through the first 50% of the book you will end up finding yourself enthralled in the story of Alba's life and curious to know how things turn out for her and her children in the end.
I have yet to become a mother and don't know what it must be like to face the challenges Alba faced so I cannot judge her for any of the decisions she made. I find it interesting that so many readers are able to criticize so much of this woman's life. Yes, the writing wasn't very good. Yes, it seemed a little poorly executed but the main goal was to draw attention to the fact that staying in a abusive situation (even if it's "just" psychological and emotional abuse) can have unforeseen consequences for children involved. The hardest part of reading Alba's story was knowing that she thought she was doing everything right and fought so hard to continue the life her children were accustomed to only to find out later down the road that she played a part in the pain and suffering they endured. I can't imagine what it must be like to regret something you fought so hard for. My heart goes out to Alba and her family and I hope others are able to take something away from her story rather than just focusing on the fact that it wasn't told in the most glamorous fashion. I can't imagine it was easy to air all of her dirty laundry for others to read and criticize. Alba deserves a lot of credit for admitting her faults and mistakes. Not many people are willing to do so.
I won this book in a GoodReads giveaway so thank you to Alba Castillo and the publisher for my copy of Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For?
If a reader is able to take a step back and realize that the author isn't a professional writer but was simply writing Malice Intent in order to share her story and hopefully prevent others from making similar mistakes, this book can be very enjoyable (as enjoyable as reading about someone else's hardships can be at least). I do think there were a lot of specific retellings presented in the book that could have been omitted to make things flow smoother. I also noticed a lot of spelling and grammar mistakes which unfortunately took away from the story in the beginning. If you are willing to tough it out through the first 50% of the book you will end up finding yourself enthralled in the story of Alba's life and curious to know how things turn out for her and her children in the end.
I have yet to become a mother and don't know what it must be like to face the challenges Alba faced so I cannot judge her for any of the decisions she made. I find it interesting that so many readers are able to criticize so much of this woman's life. Yes, the writing wasn't very good. Yes, it seemed a little poorly executed but the main goal was to draw attention to the fact that staying in a abusive situation (even if it's "just" psychological and emotional abuse) can have unforeseen consequences for children involved. The hardest part of reading Alba's story was knowing that she thought she was doing everything right and fought so hard to continue the life her children were accustomed to only to find out later down the road that she played a part in the pain and suffering they endured. I can't imagine what it must be like to regret something you fought so hard for. My heart goes out to Alba and her family and I hope others are able to take something away from her story rather than just focusing on the fact that it wasn't told in the most glamorous fashion. I can't imagine it was easy to air all of her dirty laundry for others to read and criticize. Alba deserves a lot of credit for admitting her faults and mistakes. Not many people are willing to do so.
I won this book in a GoodReads giveaway so thank you to Alba Castillo and the publisher for my copy of Malice Intent: Is Love Worth Dying For?
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