Primary Whites: A Novel Look at Right-wing Politics

by C.E. Crimmins (Editor), Thomas Maeder (Editor)

Harry Beltway, idealistic young conservative and grandson of a famous television evangelist, has just come back from a two-year tour as a missionary when he is persuaded to join the campaign staff of Mike Duncannon. The candidate is an arch-conservative television commentator who has set his sights on the Republican nomination for president so that he can build a barbed-wire fence all around America.
For Harry - and the reader - the experience of managing Duncannon's campaign is an education in right-wing extremism, isolationist chutzpah, and fundamental dysfunction. Daily, he must interact with Day Duncannon, the candidate's powerful cousin and campaign manager, and Sherry, the candidate's Stepford wife, who spends her days clipping recipes and knitting sweaters for fetuses in jars.
As a candidate, Duncannon wows conservative fundamentalist Americans with his promises to protect them from Zulus and wetbacks and his reassurances that school prayer will someday return and abortionists will disappear. Lock and load is one of the candidate's most popular solutions to complex social and economic problems. Yet Harry must run interference when Duncannon's campaign starts to fall apart after accusations of campaign bullying (Duncannon's brothers are harassing and beating up his opponents), sexual misconduct (Duncannon is discovered having semi-weekly rendezvous with a mysterious blonde), and devil worship (Duncannon is caught channeling the spirit of the late Richard Nixon, his former boss). And along the way, Harry starts a confusing love affair with a fellow campaign worker that turns out to be, literally, a drag.

153 pages, Hardcover

First published May 1, 1996

Reviews

[Lana · Rating 2 out of 5]

In cleaning through my apartment I have found an old treasure-trove of book related papers, including my “books read” list from 1999-2000. In addition to listing the books, I wrote about 2-3 sentences to myself – sometimes they were plot reminders, sometimes commentary on the books. I don’t imagine these will be very helpful to anyone else, but I’m posting them here for two reasons: first, to keep my reviews/comments in one place now and, second, because they’re kind of a fascinating look at my younger brain.

A nice break from serious reading -- a parody of primary colors. Funny especially in the names for the candidates.

[grundoon · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5 I tried to just enjoy this as intended - an over-the-top parody (of the 1996 GOP primary race... and possibly of another book I happen to have lying around somewhere that came out a few months earlier, though it looks also to be parody?) - but, well, mean-spirited humor is still mean-spirited. No wonder at all that my copy appears to have originated in a $2 hardback bargain bin.

[Laura · Rating 2 out of 5]

Thinly veiled, heavy handed, super-short! A trip back in time. *star wipe*