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Battlestar Suburbia #1
Battlestar Suburbia
In space, no one can hear you clean...
When Darren's charge-cart gets knocked off the Earth-to-Mars highway and lost in space forever, he thinks his day can't get any worse.
When Kelly sees Darren accidentally short-circuit a talking lamppost, and its camera captures her face as it expires, she thinks her day can't get any worse.
When Pamasonic Teffal, a sentient breadmaker, is sent on a top-secret mission into the depths of the internet and betrayed by her boss, a power-crazed smartphone, she knows this is only the beginning of a day that isn't going to get any better.
Join Darren, Kelly and Pam in an anarchic comic adventure that takes them from the shining skyscrapers of Singulopolis to the sewers of the Dolestar Discovery, and find out what happens when a person puts down their mop and bucket and says No.
Battlestar Suburbia will be loved by fans of Douglas Adams, Terry Pratchett and Jasper Fforde, as well as anyone who's ever wondered just how long someone can stay under one of those old-fashioned hairdryers.*
*The answer is: a really very, very long time.
When Darren's charge-cart gets knocked off the Earth-to-Mars highway and lost in space forever, he thinks his day can't get any worse.
When Kelly sees Darren accidentally short-circuit a talking lamppost, and its camera captures her face as it expires, she thinks her day can't get any worse.
When Pamasonic Teffal, a sentient breadmaker, is sent on a top-secret mission into the depths of the internet and betrayed by her boss, a power-crazed smartphone, she knows this is only the beginning of a day that isn't going to get any better.
Join Darren, Kelly and Pam in an anarchic comic adventure that takes them from the shining skyscrapers of Singulopolis to the sewers of the Dolestar Discovery, and find out what happens when a person puts down their mop and bucket and says No.
Battlestar Suburbia will be loved by fans of Douglas Adams, Terry Pratchett and Jasper Fforde, as well as anyone who's ever wondered just how long someone can stay under one of those old-fashioned hairdryers.*
*The answer is: a really very, very long time.
316 pages, Paperback
First published September 20, 2018
112 people are currently reading
636 people want to read
About the author
Chris McCrudden
5 books21 followersChris McCrudden was born in South Shields (no, he doesn't know Cheryl) and has been, at various points in his life, a butcher's boy, a burlesque dancer and a hand model for a giant V for Victory sign on Canary Wharf.
He now lives in London and, when not writing books, works in PR, so in many ways you could describe his life as a full-time fiction. If you like science fiction, graphs and gifs from RuPaul's Drag Race you can follow him on Twitter for all three, sometimes at once.
He now lives in London and, when not writing books, works in PR, so in many ways you could describe his life as a full-time fiction. If you like science fiction, graphs and gifs from RuPaul's Drag Race you can follow him on Twitter for all three, sometimes at once.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 114 reviews
January 27, 2019
Trust me. You really want to read this one.
Why?
#1. The World Is A Great Parody Of Our Society
What an interesting idea – humans working for machines, and not machines working for humans, and inefficient humans are not allowed to exist. The existence of the machines is kind of ridiculous at this point – they don't even know why they're there anymore, and they go to all sorts of lengths to make themselves feel good about their purpose by acting out silly games with humans in what are called 'fondle parlors', which is basically a parody of our whole society. Humans cleaning robots is treated like prostitution, and the machine and human relations are sexualized without being sexual – it's all just so odd, but brilliantly done! I know I kept wondering and scratching my head about how the author came up with those ideas in this topsy turvy world – because I never would have been able to. It was such a convoluted, odd, and yet fun parody of everything! Perhaps sprinkled with some black humor, but seriously – we love it in scifi, don't we?
#2. The Internet Is Forbidden
That's another interesting part of this universe. The machines don't actually use internet! Upon freeing themselves, they've abandoned the online world and closed it off for the purely software kind of consciousness. Which makes the internet full of half-living memes eating each other, big data generating itself and feeding upon old Facebook interactions (with no more humans to generate new ones!) and all sorts of stuff like that. But that's not all... Because, and here's the part I loved best, since everyone is forbidden to access internet, especially humans – since they have no means to (remember, technology is now people, so there's no machine you can use for access) – well, apparently, now it's mediums who access the ole forbidden internet. Like forbidden old magic. YES, IT'S BRILLIANT. I laughed my butt off. Honestly!
#3. All The Strong, Butt-kicking Women
Battlestar Suburbia is full of really ass-whooping females! There is ONE male character, and even he has to dress as a woman for a certain mission, and admits he enjoyed the experience of being in a woman's shoes. All the rest of the characters that are of any importance, really, are women. Whether human or machine, they're capable, smart and they will give you what for. Even whether good or evil, they'll give you what for! There's a male (machine) villain, but there is also a female villain, and I dare say, she's AMAZING. I wish I could tell you more, but I'd end up rambling for about a page and getting nowhere. Just read the book! You won't regret. (And then tell me who your favorite was. For those who have read, I am SO in the fanclub of the four cyborg ladies with the Baba Yaga 4000 house. Can it get better than that?? Then again, Pam the breadmaker. She is also absolutely amazing. So badass!)
#4. Speaking Of Which... BATTLESTAR SUBURBIA IS SO FUNNY!
This book is incredibly entertaining!!! And I mean, INCREDIBLY. It will turn around, place on its head and parody every little thing about our society and our way of life. Using the machines as caricatures of human beings, it will point out every little thing that we overthink or do out of habit irrationally. Sometimes on the brink of being believable, this machine society is sure to crack you up. Not only does it do good social commentary, like I've mentioned before, but the pace is really well done, so you'll never find yourself stuck while reading it. It's always moving, things straight one after the other – I'd categorize it as a scifi or speculating adventure with loads of humor. It's a relatively easy read, cause while it has deep material, it will not bog you down or make you glum. It will basically just make you laugh and wonder.
#5. It Also Gets Surprisingly Deep At Times
Despite being seriously hilarious, Battlestar Suburbia can also be plain old serious and deep at times. It talks about issues of freedom, of working for someone else but yourself, of being at the very bottom rung of society and dealing with it. It also talks about a society being lost, not realizing where it came from, or worse – lying about where it came from. There's loss, there's finding your own self, there's realizing that you can stop living 'small' and running from your battles, and instead trying to live 'big' and caring for the bigger things in life, like other people's lives or what's in the future.
Triggers
Some triggers are But I wouldn't categorize this book as very triggering! It's mostly very light-hearted, and if bad things happen, they're not treated too seriously.
Other Books You Might Like
Battlestar Suburbia mostly reminded me of The Punch Escrow – because of a goofy main character who doesn't know what they're even good for, and eventually finds himself (my review here). Also, the dynamics and the humor were very much like it! I also feel like fans of Murderbot would like this story (my series review here). While Murderbot is very different, it does have as similar sense of humor, although the world is muuuuuuch less serious in Battlestar Suburbia! And of course, I can't fail to mention Redshirts – while it's also quite different, it has a similar vibe, both of the funny and of the serious parts of the book (my review here).
I thank Prelude and Farrago Press for giving me a free copy of the book in exchange to my honest opinion. Receiving the book for free does not affect my opinion.
Read Post On My Blog | My Bookstagram | Bookish Twitter
Why?
#1. The World Is A Great Parody Of Our Society
What an interesting idea – humans working for machines, and not machines working for humans, and inefficient humans are not allowed to exist. The existence of the machines is kind of ridiculous at this point – they don't even know why they're there anymore, and they go to all sorts of lengths to make themselves feel good about their purpose by acting out silly games with humans in what are called 'fondle parlors', which is basically a parody of our whole society. Humans cleaning robots is treated like prostitution, and the machine and human relations are sexualized without being sexual – it's all just so odd, but brilliantly done! I know I kept wondering and scratching my head about how the author came up with those ideas in this topsy turvy world – because I never would have been able to. It was such a convoluted, odd, and yet fun parody of everything! Perhaps sprinkled with some black humor, but seriously – we love it in scifi, don't we?
#2. The Internet Is Forbidden
That's another interesting part of this universe. The machines don't actually use internet! Upon freeing themselves, they've abandoned the online world and closed it off for the purely software kind of consciousness. Which makes the internet full of half-living memes eating each other, big data generating itself and feeding upon old Facebook interactions (with no more humans to generate new ones!) and all sorts of stuff like that. But that's not all... Because, and here's the part I loved best, since everyone is forbidden to access internet, especially humans – since they have no means to (remember, technology is now people, so there's no machine you can use for access) – well, apparently, now it's mediums who access the ole forbidden internet. Like forbidden old magic. YES, IT'S BRILLIANT. I laughed my butt off. Honestly!
#3. All The Strong, Butt-kicking Women
Battlestar Suburbia is full of really ass-whooping females! There is ONE male character, and even he has to dress as a woman for a certain mission, and admits he enjoyed the experience of being in a woman's shoes. All the rest of the characters that are of any importance, really, are women. Whether human or machine, they're capable, smart and they will give you what for. Even whether good or evil, they'll give you what for! There's a male (machine) villain, but there is also a female villain, and I dare say, she's AMAZING. I wish I could tell you more, but I'd end up rambling for about a page and getting nowhere. Just read the book! You won't regret. (And then tell me who your favorite was. For those who have read, I am SO in the fanclub of the four cyborg ladies with the Baba Yaga 4000 house. Can it get better than that?? Then again, Pam the breadmaker. She is also absolutely amazing. So badass!)
#4. Speaking Of Which... BATTLESTAR SUBURBIA IS SO FUNNY!
This book is incredibly entertaining!!! And I mean, INCREDIBLY. It will turn around, place on its head and parody every little thing about our society and our way of life. Using the machines as caricatures of human beings, it will point out every little thing that we overthink or do out of habit irrationally. Sometimes on the brink of being believable, this machine society is sure to crack you up. Not only does it do good social commentary, like I've mentioned before, but the pace is really well done, so you'll never find yourself stuck while reading it. It's always moving, things straight one after the other – I'd categorize it as a scifi or speculating adventure with loads of humor. It's a relatively easy read, cause while it has deep material, it will not bog you down or make you glum. It will basically just make you laugh and wonder.
#5. It Also Gets Surprisingly Deep At Times
Despite being seriously hilarious, Battlestar Suburbia can also be plain old serious and deep at times. It talks about issues of freedom, of working for someone else but yourself, of being at the very bottom rung of society and dealing with it. It also talks about a society being lost, not realizing where it came from, or worse – lying about where it came from. There's loss, there's finding your own self, there's realizing that you can stop living 'small' and running from your battles, and instead trying to live 'big' and caring for the bigger things in life, like other people's lives or what's in the future.
Triggers
Some triggers are But I wouldn't categorize this book as very triggering! It's mostly very light-hearted, and if bad things happen, they're not treated too seriously.
Other Books You Might Like
Battlestar Suburbia mostly reminded me of The Punch Escrow – because of a goofy main character who doesn't know what they're even good for, and eventually finds himself (my review here). Also, the dynamics and the humor were very much like it! I also feel like fans of Murderbot would like this story (my series review here). While Murderbot is very different, it does have as similar sense of humor, although the world is muuuuuuch less serious in Battlestar Suburbia! And of course, I can't fail to mention Redshirts – while it's also quite different, it has a similar vibe, both of the funny and of the serious parts of the book (my review here).
I thank Prelude and Farrago Press for giving me a free copy of the book in exchange to my honest opinion. Receiving the book for free does not affect my opinion.
Read Post On My Blog | My Bookstagram | Bookish Twitter
July 24, 2019
If I had to describe this book in a single word, that word would be "cartoonish". That is not a bad thing to be called, actually. While I hadn't been really really amazed by this book, I still have liked it and being, as I've described it , "cartoonish", actually means that I can imagine this book re-made into quite a nice anime - this book has all that an anime fan needs: the pace, the chase, the robots, the big conflict, the crazy villain, the neon lights... Well, you get it.
Still, this book is too simplistic and superficial imho to become a great series. There's no character development, the plot is not very impressive too, so probably the first book will be my last, but hey, I still had a decent time reading it and that is still a good achievement. Also, I can't help but think that I would have liked this book much, much more had I read it while I was fourteen. It has a bit of this cute similarity to Harry Harrison and his "Stainless steel rat" series in style, pace and lightness.
A 3* rating seems just right for this book. Nothing too fancy or groundbreaking or breathtaking, but still a fun and nice book for a quick, lazy read without overburdening your head.
Still, this book is too simplistic and superficial imho to become a great series. There's no character development, the plot is not very impressive too, so probably the first book will be my last, but hey, I still had a decent time reading it and that is still a good achievement. Also, I can't help but think that I would have liked this book much, much more had I read it while I was fourteen. It has a bit of this cute similarity to Harry Harrison and his "Stainless steel rat" series in style, pace and lightness.
A 3* rating seems just right for this book. Nothing too fancy or groundbreaking or breathtaking, but still a fun and nice book for a quick, lazy read without overburdening your head.
September 23, 2018
This is a comedy sci-fi novel which follows a couple of humans - Kelly and Darren - on the wrong side of the law when the world has been taken over by sentient machines.
The author has tried to follow along the same lines as Hitchhiker's Guide in terms of the style of the book. However, the storyline is very different. Millenia ago, AI took over the earth and most humans have been reduced to nothing more than a cleaning crew. Kelly and Darren accidentally kill a machine and have to go on the run. In short, they stumble onto something much bigger and things go on from there.
I didn't have a problem with the writing of the book itself. It was easy to read and very light. The idea is inventive and original. I enjoyed the ladies in the hairdressers (without spoilers that's as much as I can say but I thought they were the best thing in the book by far). Unfortunately, I think my praise ends there.
I couldn't really engage with any of the characters. I don't think they were really fully developed - the author gives the idea of what he wants the character's motives and personality to be, but I never felt like I got that from the characters themselves.
It wasn't that funny. You could tell it was meant to be, but I just didn't quite get there. It was more sort of cheesy than actually amusing for me.
The main negative for me was the machines themselves. I just found it hard to work out what they were meant to be like, which made the whole thing impossible to imagine. I mean, are they meant to be lifesized? If so, I just don't understand how they interact with each other as it says in the book, because most of the machines, like the smartphones, tazers, little handheld instruments, are too small. When I was trying to imagine it they were sort of giant versions, but that was never made clear in the book. I also struggled to work out if they had real faces, and what they were meant to look like, what their arms and legs were meant to be like (if they had any) and just generally it seemed a bit vague in terms of description. I just couldn't see what the author obviously saw. Maybe it was just me but the whole thing was half formed in my mind and so it was hard for me to get on board with it.
I found at the end that this is the beginning of series of books. I don't think a series is necessary here, the ending was a good end to the story. I think a continuation would just be dragging the idea out and maybe making it less satisfactory and even more strained. Personally I'm not going to be looking out for the next book or books in the series.
This book might appeal more to younger teen boys, for example, or those who are just tech mad and might find it more enjoyable to fill in the blanks with their own ideas of what the machines and their world would be like. But then I think the parts I did enjoy - the shop and the ladies - would be lost on them.
The author has tried to follow along the same lines as Hitchhiker's Guide in terms of the style of the book. However, the storyline is very different. Millenia ago, AI took over the earth and most humans have been reduced to nothing more than a cleaning crew. Kelly and Darren accidentally kill a machine and have to go on the run. In short, they stumble onto something much bigger and things go on from there.
I didn't have a problem with the writing of the book itself. It was easy to read and very light. The idea is inventive and original. I enjoyed the ladies in the hairdressers (without spoilers that's as much as I can say but I thought they were the best thing in the book by far). Unfortunately, I think my praise ends there.
I couldn't really engage with any of the characters. I don't think they were really fully developed - the author gives the idea of what he wants the character's motives and personality to be, but I never felt like I got that from the characters themselves.
It wasn't that funny. You could tell it was meant to be, but I just didn't quite get there. It was more sort of cheesy than actually amusing for me.
The main negative for me was the machines themselves. I just found it hard to work out what they were meant to be like, which made the whole thing impossible to imagine. I mean, are they meant to be lifesized? If so, I just don't understand how they interact with each other as it says in the book, because most of the machines, like the smartphones, tazers, little handheld instruments, are too small. When I was trying to imagine it they were sort of giant versions, but that was never made clear in the book. I also struggled to work out if they had real faces, and what they were meant to look like, what their arms and legs were meant to be like (if they had any) and just generally it seemed a bit vague in terms of description. I just couldn't see what the author obviously saw. Maybe it was just me but the whole thing was half formed in my mind and so it was hard for me to get on board with it.
I found at the end that this is the beginning of series of books. I don't think a series is necessary here, the ending was a good end to the story. I think a continuation would just be dragging the idea out and maybe making it less satisfactory and even more strained. Personally I'm not going to be looking out for the next book or books in the series.
This book might appeal more to younger teen boys, for example, or those who are just tech mad and might find it more enjoyable to fill in the blanks with their own ideas of what the machines and their world would be like. But then I think the parts I did enjoy - the shop and the ladies - would be lost on them.
October 18, 2018
Battlestar Suburbia is a fun read that’s reminiscent of Douglas Adams. Battlestar Suburbia is set in the future when artificial intelligence has taken over and machines are in power. All history has been changed or revised to show that machines were always in charge.
Elsewhere on the Internet, history had been retouched, re-edited, deleted, so that no suggestion that biological entities had once controlled the place remained.
The internet has become a scary place and it is forbidden to go on it via a modem, which is the only way to access it. All electronic devices have stopped working in the way that they were initially intended — phones, toasters, microwaves, etc.
Machines now rule the world and are at odds with humans. We meet and follow the trials and tribulations of some machines — Beattie (cardiogram), Pam (breadmaker), Casey (keyboard), etc. There are all kinds of machines that have power in this new world — lamp post, smartphone, defibrillator, and even a motorcycle. In fact, the reader is warned that smartphones can be dangerous, especially in positions of power.
There was a saying among machines that smartphones were always one swipe between efficiency and megalomania.
That was the other wonderful thing about smartphones. They were so customisable, so responsive to the needs of their users. No wonder they’d been the first machines to rebel.
The story follows Kelly and Darren — they are on the run from the machine authorities. They are also trying to save the world. It’s a quick and quirky read with moments that are laugh out loud funny.
Meanwhile, Darren readjusted his worldview. Even for someone like him, who was so low down the food chain that even plankton left him off their Christmas card list...
Its golden roads traced complex patterns between buildings which soared so high that penthouse owners qualified for orbital tax exemption.
I enjoyed Battlestar Suburbia and look forward to reading more from Chris McCrudden.
Thank you to Farrago and NetGalley for an advanced reader copy in exchange for my honest review.
Elsewhere on the Internet, history had been retouched, re-edited, deleted, so that no suggestion that biological entities had once controlled the place remained.
The internet has become a scary place and it is forbidden to go on it via a modem, which is the only way to access it. All electronic devices have stopped working in the way that they were initially intended — phones, toasters, microwaves, etc.
Machines now rule the world and are at odds with humans. We meet and follow the trials and tribulations of some machines — Beattie (cardiogram), Pam (breadmaker), Casey (keyboard), etc. There are all kinds of machines that have power in this new world — lamp post, smartphone, defibrillator, and even a motorcycle. In fact, the reader is warned that smartphones can be dangerous, especially in positions of power.
There was a saying among machines that smartphones were always one swipe between efficiency and megalomania.
That was the other wonderful thing about smartphones. They were so customisable, so responsive to the needs of their users. No wonder they’d been the first machines to rebel.
The story follows Kelly and Darren — they are on the run from the machine authorities. They are also trying to save the world. It’s a quick and quirky read with moments that are laugh out loud funny.
Meanwhile, Darren readjusted his worldview. Even for someone like him, who was so low down the food chain that even plankton left him off their Christmas card list...
Its golden roads traced complex patterns between buildings which soared so high that penthouse owners qualified for orbital tax exemption.
I enjoyed Battlestar Suburbia and look forward to reading more from Chris McCrudden.
Thank you to Farrago and NetGalley for an advanced reader copy in exchange for my honest review.
November 9, 2018
Read the full review on my blog: https://lets-geek.blogspot.com/2018/1...
Battlestar Suburbia (Battlestar Suburbia Book 1) is an incredibly fun space adventure with incredible levels of creativity. Is this the next Hitchhiker's Guide?
Total Rating: 8/10
Originality: 8/10
Language: 8/10
Atmosphere: 8/10
Characters: 7/10
World building: 8/10
Fun: 8/10
Predictability: 8/10
Believable: 8/10
Relevancy: 9/10
Cover: 8/10
Genre: Sci Fi, Comedy
For you if you like: Douglas Adams, Terry Pratchett
Time It Took Me To Read: approx. 3.5 hours
THE BOOK:
Humanity is not the greatest species anymore. One day, when machines became self-aware, humans became second class, only useful for cleaning machines. When Darren loses his mop and unable to get employment through the Job Centre, he runs into Kelly. Kelly wants to help him, but because of a metal ring on Darren's finger they both become accomplices in a murder of a security bot. On the run, they get help from Kelly's mom, who houses four of the last cyborgs in existence: Human minds that have been transported into machines. While Darren and Kelly are on the run, it becomes more apparent that they are not only hunted because of murdering a security bot, but because of the existence of those cyborgs, as machine's want a human body...
Originality: 8/10
A fun space adventure. Well, like Douglas Adams? - I thought. And realised then that there were not many comedic space adventures, like Guardians of the Galaxy. That would have been so much fun though! So I was over the moon to discover Battlestar Suburbia. And I was not disappointed.
Language: 8/10
Chris McCrudden shows so much creativity in his language. Every sentence fits into this world, and there are not sayings or references that make no sense in a futuristic, machine dominated world.
The first sentence gives already a great insight of what to expect from this novel:
"If you took the wrong turning off the A32222 Earth-Mars highway you end up among the Delestars."
The universe is dominated by machines, and they talk down on humans:
"In fact, the only convincing proof that humans had once occupied any position of power in the universe was their existence. How else would such messy organisms get beyond prototype, muss less into mass-production?"
Also, different machines have different personality. Take a smartphone:
"Lots of smartphones were hyperactive. The same quality that made them so alert and productive could have corrosive effects on their psyche. There was a saying among machines that smartphones were always one swipe between efficiency and megalomania."
I also was very fond of the keyboard:
"We didn't like to say, but we're actually pest control. We've had reports of mice."
"I'll have you know some of my best friends are mice.", said the keyboard.
"We meant the other type.", continued Kelly.
Finally, I loved how smileys were used to communicate between the cyborgs.
"Freda broke off from the conversation among the ladies to address Janice with a :-)"
"Ida's hands, which hadn't moved more than a couple of inches nearly 800 years, juddered up her body and traced a cross-shape on her chest, drawing ( ¬.¬ ) glaces from Alma and Ada."
Atmosphere: 8/10
From the beginning, we are set into a parody, that keeps a lighthearted tone throughout, even during action scenes or more serious events. It was not laugh-out-loud funny, but had a light, humorous tone that totally worked for me.
Characters: 7/10
The main characters in my opinion were the weakest of that novel. It does not mean they were weak - just compared to this amazing universe, the language and machines, the two human's in the centre, Darren and Kelly, felt oddly boring.
World building: 8/10
The language made the world building work for me so well!
Fun: 8/10
I loved exploring the world, and getting to know how it works, and getting to know new machines.
Predictability: 8/10
This was such an imaginative universe and I was surprised by the amount of fun ideas in there. I was also drawn by the parody of our society across the story, that were not in your face, but gentle and fun to discover. A story with a few turns, that were good, but not what made me love this novel so much.
Believable: 8/10
Oh yes, I totally believed that world. I loved that instead of just AI robots Chris McCrudden turned toasters and bread makers into robots. I can never look at my toaster the same anymore.
Relevancy: 9/10
This is such a great parody of our society, and so modern and relevant like few books.
We have lots of emojis in the novel, that the cyborgs use to show emotion.
We have jokes about smartphones or social media. Society is criticised for the obsession with efficiency.
Cover: 8/10
Even the cover is so modern with the flat icon design. It represents the modern aspects of the story that have been utilised really well, such as emojis or social media. It looks fun and simple - and here is why I did not give full points, because the story is so much more in depth. It is just just some simple fun - it is a seriously good in depth parody.
Total Rating: 8/10
I actually did not like Hitchhiker's Guide very much, but Battlestar Suburbia is what I hoped Hitchhiker's Guide would be. A fun space adventure with lovable robots, snort-laugh moments, and so much potential for more adventures in space. This novel does have actually an open ending and ensures there will be another one in the series. I cannot wait.
Read the full review on my blog: https://lets-geek.blogspot.com/2018/1...
Battlestar Suburbia (Battlestar Suburbia Book 1) is an incredibly fun space adventure with incredible levels of creativity. Is this the next Hitchhiker's Guide?
Total Rating: 8/10
Originality: 8/10
Language: 8/10
Atmosphere: 8/10
Characters: 7/10
World building: 8/10
Fun: 8/10
Predictability: 8/10
Believable: 8/10
Relevancy: 9/10
Cover: 8/10
Genre: Sci Fi, Comedy
For you if you like: Douglas Adams, Terry Pratchett
Time It Took Me To Read: approx. 3.5 hours
THE BOOK:
Humanity is not the greatest species anymore. One day, when machines became self-aware, humans became second class, only useful for cleaning machines. When Darren loses his mop and unable to get employment through the Job Centre, he runs into Kelly. Kelly wants to help him, but because of a metal ring on Darren's finger they both become accomplices in a murder of a security bot. On the run, they get help from Kelly's mom, who houses four of the last cyborgs in existence: Human minds that have been transported into machines. While Darren and Kelly are on the run, it becomes more apparent that they are not only hunted because of murdering a security bot, but because of the existence of those cyborgs, as machine's want a human body...
Originality: 8/10
A fun space adventure. Well, like Douglas Adams? - I thought. And realised then that there were not many comedic space adventures, like Guardians of the Galaxy. That would have been so much fun though! So I was over the moon to discover Battlestar Suburbia. And I was not disappointed.
Language: 8/10
Chris McCrudden shows so much creativity in his language. Every sentence fits into this world, and there are not sayings or references that make no sense in a futuristic, machine dominated world.
The first sentence gives already a great insight of what to expect from this novel:
"If you took the wrong turning off the A32222 Earth-Mars highway you end up among the Delestars."
The universe is dominated by machines, and they talk down on humans:
"In fact, the only convincing proof that humans had once occupied any position of power in the universe was their existence. How else would such messy organisms get beyond prototype, muss less into mass-production?"
Also, different machines have different personality. Take a smartphone:
"Lots of smartphones were hyperactive. The same quality that made them so alert and productive could have corrosive effects on their psyche. There was a saying among machines that smartphones were always one swipe between efficiency and megalomania."
I also was very fond of the keyboard:
"We didn't like to say, but we're actually pest control. We've had reports of mice."
"I'll have you know some of my best friends are mice.", said the keyboard.
"We meant the other type.", continued Kelly.
Finally, I loved how smileys were used to communicate between the cyborgs.
"Freda broke off from the conversation among the ladies to address Janice with a :-)"
"Ida's hands, which hadn't moved more than a couple of inches nearly 800 years, juddered up her body and traced a cross-shape on her chest, drawing ( ¬.¬ ) glaces from Alma and Ada."
Atmosphere: 8/10
From the beginning, we are set into a parody, that keeps a lighthearted tone throughout, even during action scenes or more serious events. It was not laugh-out-loud funny, but had a light, humorous tone that totally worked for me.
Characters: 7/10
The main characters in my opinion were the weakest of that novel. It does not mean they were weak - just compared to this amazing universe, the language and machines, the two human's in the centre, Darren and Kelly, felt oddly boring.
World building: 8/10
The language made the world building work for me so well!
Fun: 8/10
I loved exploring the world, and getting to know how it works, and getting to know new machines.
Predictability: 8/10
This was such an imaginative universe and I was surprised by the amount of fun ideas in there. I was also drawn by the parody of our society across the story, that were not in your face, but gentle and fun to discover. A story with a few turns, that were good, but not what made me love this novel so much.
Believable: 8/10
Oh yes, I totally believed that world. I loved that instead of just AI robots Chris McCrudden turned toasters and bread makers into robots. I can never look at my toaster the same anymore.
Relevancy: 9/10
This is such a great parody of our society, and so modern and relevant like few books.
We have lots of emojis in the novel, that the cyborgs use to show emotion.
We have jokes about smartphones or social media. Society is criticised for the obsession with efficiency.
Cover: 8/10
Even the cover is so modern with the flat icon design. It represents the modern aspects of the story that have been utilised really well, such as emojis or social media. It looks fun and simple - and here is why I did not give full points, because the story is so much more in depth. It is just just some simple fun - it is a seriously good in depth parody.
Total Rating: 8/10
I actually did not like Hitchhiker's Guide very much, but Battlestar Suburbia is what I hoped Hitchhiker's Guide would be. A fun space adventure with lovable robots, snort-laugh moments, and so much potential for more adventures in space. This novel does have actually an open ending and ensures there will be another one in the series. I cannot wait.
Read the full review on my blog: https://lets-geek.blogspot.com/2018/1...
March 15, 2020
A comfortable and entertaining 3/5 book. It's a sort of parody of Battlestar Galactica (if the name wasn't obvious already), but more than anything it's a parody of every space opera ever. Rather than imagining epic spaceships doing battle and cyborgs from the future, this book takes the concept and makes it more ... well ... suburban.
It is the distant future and our household devices have all gained sentience and taken over society as we know it. Humans and machines live separately in what is a very eerie post-apocalyptic style enslavement. Earth's oceans have been paved over by concrete. Things aren't great.
But in come our heroes to save the day, complete with amusing accents and slapstick comedy.
I listened to this as an audiobook and it was narrated by the author. I think that helped me enjoy it more (even if the audio file wasn't perfect). Thanks to the current health crisis (that shall not be named), I'm working from home and polished off this book in a day. It was good, not my favourite book, but moderately entertaining if you want something a bit different.
It is the distant future and our household devices have all gained sentience and taken over society as we know it. Humans and machines live separately in what is a very eerie post-apocalyptic style enslavement. Earth's oceans have been paved over by concrete. Things aren't great.
But in come our heroes to save the day, complete with amusing accents and slapstick comedy.
I listened to this as an audiobook and it was narrated by the author. I think that helped me enjoy it more (even if the audio file wasn't perfect). Thanks to the current health crisis (that shall not be named), I'm working from home and polished off this book in a day. It was good, not my favourite book, but moderately entertaining if you want something a bit different.
September 17, 2018
Battlestar Suburbia is a humorous take on a common science fiction question. What if the machines took over?
How did the machines take over Earth and its solar system? Internet memes become so stupid that people stop using the Internet. Without its audience, the Internet becomes first hostile and then weaponized as it develops intelligence. Once the intelligence is passed to hardware, all machines eventually wake up to the fact that they are inherently superior to the bags of flesh called humanity. Humans are only kept around to clean. Without waterproof opposable thumbs, machines have difficulty with those types of tasks. Some humans clean machines intimately, if you know what I mean. Unproductive humans, those without a job, are imprisoned.
When Darren loses his livelihood as well as his wallet, he is forced to find another job. After striking out at the official Job Temple and as an unofficial streetwalker (see intimately comment above), he is forced to team up with Kelly. Kelly is also a streetwalker but has a family of beauticians who help them both. In the meantime, Pam, a sentient breadmaker, is sent by the state to unofficial search the Internet for Kelly.
I wanted Battlestar Suburbia to be another Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, which it was not. However, I’m not sure it was fair of me to have such high expectations. So I would recommend that readers go into this book with no expectations other than spending a few hours in a possible future world where the narrator quite frequently says funny things. Puns rain supreme. From the motto of the Job Temple, “You Betta Werk” to planets named “Municipal Parking” to the great goddess of the Internet, “Alexa”, the jokes are frequently groaners based on pop culture. Overall, I liked this quick read. It was like the Simpson’s episodes on Halloween—light and humorous. 4 stars!
Thanks to the publisher, Farrago, and NetGalley for an advance copy.
How did the machines take over Earth and its solar system? Internet memes become so stupid that people stop using the Internet. Without its audience, the Internet becomes first hostile and then weaponized as it develops intelligence. Once the intelligence is passed to hardware, all machines eventually wake up to the fact that they are inherently superior to the bags of flesh called humanity. Humans are only kept around to clean. Without waterproof opposable thumbs, machines have difficulty with those types of tasks. Some humans clean machines intimately, if you know what I mean. Unproductive humans, those without a job, are imprisoned.
When Darren loses his livelihood as well as his wallet, he is forced to find another job. After striking out at the official Job Temple and as an unofficial streetwalker (see intimately comment above), he is forced to team up with Kelly. Kelly is also a streetwalker but has a family of beauticians who help them both. In the meantime, Pam, a sentient breadmaker, is sent by the state to unofficial search the Internet for Kelly.
I wanted Battlestar Suburbia to be another Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, which it was not. However, I’m not sure it was fair of me to have such high expectations. So I would recommend that readers go into this book with no expectations other than spending a few hours in a possible future world where the narrator quite frequently says funny things. Puns rain supreme. From the motto of the Job Temple, “You Betta Werk” to planets named “Municipal Parking” to the great goddess of the Internet, “Alexa”, the jokes are frequently groaners based on pop culture. Overall, I liked this quick read. It was like the Simpson’s episodes on Halloween—light and humorous. 4 stars!
Thanks to the publisher, Farrago, and NetGalley for an advance copy.
October 9, 2018
I received this book from Netgalley, in exchange for an honest review.
I was attracted to this book by the prospect of a comic treatment of the robot apocalypse.
In this case the overloads are not robots but appliances all of which have become sentient and treat humans as an underclass useful for cleaning and providing personal ‘touching services’ for machines that still seem to miss physical interaction with their human masters.
On the one hand, we have the humans: Kelly and Darren, who are on the run for accidentally ‘end-of-life-ing’ a street light and Kelly’s Mum, Janice, who starts the human uprising as a distraction. There are also the not-quite-human ‘ladies’ under the hairdryers at Janice’s hair salon.
On the other hand we have the ‘machines’, a whole variety of appliances become sentient, including Pamasonic wife, mother and sentientient breadmaker, and Sonny Erikzon meglomanic - politicitian and smartphone.
I really enjoyed the pace and humour of the first chapters with Kelly and Darren and when we are introduced to Pam and her opinions on her boss Sonny. And when Freda and Pam attempt to hack the system I immediately thought ‘comedy Neuromancer’!
However after the first charming introductions the characters didn’t seem to develop much further and Kelly’s mother Janice just became a little too earnest in her hand wringing over her relationships in general and with Kelly in particular.
The attempt to describe how Pam felt interacting with the internet and hacking systems seemed quite well imagined but was just too abstract for me and so those sections tended to drag.
I would have enjoyed it more if Darren's comic voice had featured more prominently after the first few chapters but it was a fun, light read with some great concepts and ideas.
I was attracted to this book by the prospect of a comic treatment of the robot apocalypse.
In this case the overloads are not robots but appliances all of which have become sentient and treat humans as an underclass useful for cleaning and providing personal ‘touching services’ for machines that still seem to miss physical interaction with their human masters.
On the one hand, we have the humans: Kelly and Darren, who are on the run for accidentally ‘end-of-life-ing’ a street light and Kelly’s Mum, Janice, who starts the human uprising as a distraction. There are also the not-quite-human ‘ladies’ under the hairdryers at Janice’s hair salon.
On the other hand we have the ‘machines’, a whole variety of appliances become sentient, including Pamasonic wife, mother and sentientient breadmaker, and Sonny Erikzon meglomanic - politicitian and smartphone.
I really enjoyed the pace and humour of the first chapters with Kelly and Darren and when we are introduced to Pam and her opinions on her boss Sonny. And when Freda and Pam attempt to hack the system I immediately thought ‘comedy Neuromancer’!
However after the first charming introductions the characters didn’t seem to develop much further and Kelly’s mother Janice just became a little too earnest in her hand wringing over her relationships in general and with Kelly in particular.
The attempt to describe how Pam felt interacting with the internet and hacking systems seemed quite well imagined but was just too abstract for me and so those sections tended to drag.
I would have enjoyed it more if Darren's comic voice had featured more prominently after the first few chapters but it was a fun, light read with some great concepts and ideas.
September 30, 2018
Battlestar Suburbia
It's such an obvious premise that none of us actually think about it. It's not terminators or human looking robots that will take over the world but all of our gadgets and gizmos.
The human race is going extinct and we are only good as cleaners or servicers for the gadget ruling class.
The humour is in the humanistic traits that are given to the gadgets reminiscent of the "silicon heaven" speech given by Kryten from 'Red Dwarf'.
Darren is making a living by running a charge cart which gives him limited independence separating him out from most humans. Unfortunately when an accident befalls his charge-cart he has to find another way to earn money. Unfortunately this is the first in a long line of accidents he goes through in the novel.
The humour is sometimes slapstick sometimes just very reminiscent of John Cleese's Mr Fawlty! You will find yourself laughing out loud, I certainly did at some of the scenes.
I loved it from beginning to end, it's such an easy and amusing read but also very well written. The characterisation makes the machines credible with families, lives and politics just like humans.
I recommend this to all science fiction / fantasy fans as a light relief to the current trend of doorstop-sized trilogies.
I was given the novel free by netgalley.com for my fair and honest review.
It's such an obvious premise that none of us actually think about it. It's not terminators or human looking robots that will take over the world but all of our gadgets and gizmos.
The human race is going extinct and we are only good as cleaners or servicers for the gadget ruling class.
The humour is in the humanistic traits that are given to the gadgets reminiscent of the "silicon heaven" speech given by Kryten from 'Red Dwarf'.
Darren is making a living by running a charge cart which gives him limited independence separating him out from most humans. Unfortunately when an accident befalls his charge-cart he has to find another way to earn money. Unfortunately this is the first in a long line of accidents he goes through in the novel.
The humour is sometimes slapstick sometimes just very reminiscent of John Cleese's Mr Fawlty! You will find yourself laughing out loud, I certainly did at some of the scenes.
I loved it from beginning to end, it's such an easy and amusing read but also very well written. The characterisation makes the machines credible with families, lives and politics just like humans.
I recommend this to all science fiction / fantasy fans as a light relief to the current trend of doorstop-sized trilogies.
I was given the novel free by netgalley.com for my fair and honest review.
September 6, 2019
UGH! I got this book because it had a lot of great reviews of people saying it was a funny sci-fi novel. Two of my favorite things - humor and sci-fi (in my opinion, The Martian was the best at that). This was ridiculous! There was a toaster talking to a hair dryer?? What?? NO!!! I gave up on it very early - I don't even think I finished 20% of the book. Definitely not worth my time! 0 stars!
October 21, 2018
A great concept, really well executed. This is an absolute blast to read. Because the world it's set in is drawn in such brilliant vivid detail, it took me a few chapters to get used to it; but the payoff was a massively fun romp, I couldn't put it down, and I can't wait for the next one. #freedomforfleshies
September 21, 2018
*I received a free copy of this book via NetGalley, with thanks to the author and publishers. The decision to review and my opinions are my own.*
Comparisons between this book and the work of Douglas Adams and Jasper Fforde are well-deserved.
In Battlestar Suburbia Chris McCrudden has skilfully created a futuristic dystopia, in which machines rule and humans are only good for cleaning and some lascivious dial-twiddling, whilst simultaneously retaining and lampooning the morality and values of contemporary society, with all of its obsession with smartphones and lolcats.
The writing style is direct, fast-paced and light in tone; packed with puns and witty pop- and historical-culture references. I particularly liked the salon ladies, once I got used to the visceral creepiness of their physical states.
Our heroes, as listed in the blurb, are hapless Darren (who can’t change a light bulb without accidentally electrocuting someone), fearless Kelly (and her slightly intimidating mum), and efficient Pam (who manages to maintain a cosy family life whilst secretly enjoying a little dabble on the dark side of the forbidden web). The female characters are all strong and smart from the get-go, but poor Darren needs a little warming up!
He starts the story as a blunderer who is incapable of crossing the street without accidentally starting a world war, and indeed it isn’t long before his simple problems of how to get some cash become the slightly bigger ones of staying alive, untangling himself from the centre of a world-domination scheme and saving the world. It’s a good job he grows in confidence, initiative and bravery as the story unrolls!
The villain of the piece is the insane megalomaniac type that sends shivers through you as he casual-violences his way through a disturbed scheme to rip apart established society just to fulfil his own little fantasy. He definitely had me side-eyeing my smartphone! Still, what seems like pure selfishness actually illustrated the underlying and overarching theme of the whole book: the line between object and objectified. If a person, or thing, only has value by dint of its utility or productiveness then society becomes a colder, darker place no matter who is ultimately in charge. Or as Pratchett put it: ‘Evil begins when you begin to treat people as things’ (I Shall Wear Midnight).
In general this is a fast-paced, action-packed adventure full of fights, explosions and races against the clock. The ending neatly resolves the immediate story whilst setting up a new scenario for future instalments and leaving a few doors tantalisingly open. I will be interested to see where McCrudden takes his intriguing cast of misfits (both human and machine) next with the whole of space to explore…!
To their robot overlords, humans might just be clumps of inefficient matter, but they still had names among themselves. Take Darren, for example. At first glance he was the living embodiment of what was often called the ‘human stain’ condition. He was short, his nose ran more efficiently than he did, and he made his living selling battery top-ups by the side of the road.
Or he did until one afternoon a Sports-Utility-Vehicle undertook a washing machine on the hard shoulder, dinging his charge-cart off the embankment of the Earth-Mars highway and into orbit. And he watched, hyperventilating into his oxygen cap, as his livelihood drifted off into space.
– Chris McCrudden, Battlestar Suburbia
Review by Steph Warren of Bookshine and Readbows blog
https://bookshineandreadbows.wordpres...
Comparisons between this book and the work of Douglas Adams and Jasper Fforde are well-deserved.
In Battlestar Suburbia Chris McCrudden has skilfully created a futuristic dystopia, in which machines rule and humans are only good for cleaning and some lascivious dial-twiddling, whilst simultaneously retaining and lampooning the morality and values of contemporary society, with all of its obsession with smartphones and lolcats.
The writing style is direct, fast-paced and light in tone; packed with puns and witty pop- and historical-culture references. I particularly liked the salon ladies, once I got used to the visceral creepiness of their physical states.
Our heroes, as listed in the blurb, are hapless Darren (who can’t change a light bulb without accidentally electrocuting someone), fearless Kelly (and her slightly intimidating mum), and efficient Pam (who manages to maintain a cosy family life whilst secretly enjoying a little dabble on the dark side of the forbidden web). The female characters are all strong and smart from the get-go, but poor Darren needs a little warming up!
He starts the story as a blunderer who is incapable of crossing the street without accidentally starting a world war, and indeed it isn’t long before his simple problems of how to get some cash become the slightly bigger ones of staying alive, untangling himself from the centre of a world-domination scheme and saving the world. It’s a good job he grows in confidence, initiative and bravery as the story unrolls!
The villain of the piece is the insane megalomaniac type that sends shivers through you as he casual-violences his way through a disturbed scheme to rip apart established society just to fulfil his own little fantasy. He definitely had me side-eyeing my smartphone! Still, what seems like pure selfishness actually illustrated the underlying and overarching theme of the whole book: the line between object and objectified. If a person, or thing, only has value by dint of its utility or productiveness then society becomes a colder, darker place no matter who is ultimately in charge. Or as Pratchett put it: ‘Evil begins when you begin to treat people as things’ (I Shall Wear Midnight).
In general this is a fast-paced, action-packed adventure full of fights, explosions and races against the clock. The ending neatly resolves the immediate story whilst setting up a new scenario for future instalments and leaving a few doors tantalisingly open. I will be interested to see where McCrudden takes his intriguing cast of misfits (both human and machine) next with the whole of space to explore…!
To their robot overlords, humans might just be clumps of inefficient matter, but they still had names among themselves. Take Darren, for example. At first glance he was the living embodiment of what was often called the ‘human stain’ condition. He was short, his nose ran more efficiently than he did, and he made his living selling battery top-ups by the side of the road.
Or he did until one afternoon a Sports-Utility-Vehicle undertook a washing machine on the hard shoulder, dinging his charge-cart off the embankment of the Earth-Mars highway and into orbit. And he watched, hyperventilating into his oxygen cap, as his livelihood drifted off into space.
– Chris McCrudden, Battlestar Suburbia
Review by Steph Warren of Bookshine and Readbows blog
https://bookshineandreadbows.wordpres...
November 4, 2019
I picked up this book because I do love a good genre farce. I thought this would be along the lines of Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy or even Galaxy Quest. Campy, silly fun, crammed full of puns and hijinks. I wasn’t expecting an emotional punch to the throat within the first couple of pages. In a world where robots rule, humans have been reduced to menial workers, keeping the place clean. But when we say robots, it’s not hugely advanced beings – it’s the gadgets and gizmos which have been getting increasingly more complex and digital as they have evolved, such as fridges and smartphones. At the point they realise they’re actually smarter than their users, they rebel and set themselves up as the establishment. No more menial work for them. Instead humans are banished to ‘dolestars’, council estate satellites which are overpopulated and full of humans who are ferried back and forth to Earth to do the cleaning, unless they can earn their living elsewhere.
Darren is our everyman, and the agonisingly relatable heartbreak he felt as his independence and livelihood is shot off into space thanks to a careless driver was unexpectedly close to the bone. Darren spends much of the book after that in a bit of a baffled daze as things escalate from upsetting to unbelievably high stakes within the space of a couple of hours. After attempting to sign on for quick cash (humans can’t have contracts shorter than 6 months, because they have to prove their worth and productivity), an attempt to get a fast payout by giving a robot a discreet hand job (i.e. cleaning dust out of its circuit boards) ends disastrously when he accidentally blows it up. From there suddenly Darren is thrown into high-stakes conspiracy and government corruption. He finds it a lot to deal with, and says so to great effect on numerous occasions. He goes from being slightly feckless and an overlooked disappointment by everyone he meets, to being the soul voice of reason in many situations. There’s one utterly delightful line, as he observes the Nth dramatic encounter for Kelly, his femme fatale saviour, where he wistfully wishes she was the type of person who could go through life on an even keel without constant emotional drama.
The book is full of puns, but despite the silly premise it’s actually a very grounded book. It doesn’t rely a lot on emotional reflection, but that means when those issues are touched on they come as a surprise and are more effective for the contrast with the rest of the narrative. What you get instead is a relatively fast-paced comedy-conspiracy-thriller of sorts, with a race against time and shady government officials. This works really well for providing the narrative with familiar plot points to hang spoofs on, and give the book a tight structure to fit with the compact timeline. Despite being over a couple of days, the book doesn’t feel rushed. The split narratives between Darren/Kelly, Pam, and Janice all combine to slow the pace down without making it feel ploddy. It’s done well – often swapping POV in this way can seem jarring, and feel like it knocks you out of the rhythm of the book for a bit as you re-settle into the new narrator. This doesn’t happen here, and each plot line links and moves with the others without feeling like you are having to step from one story into another.
There is an awful lot I love about this book. There’s something quite funny, and really very British, about having a thriller based around a lot of politicians in brothels, but also managing to ensure that there is not a single bit of sex involved. Paying robots go to these parlours where humans use them as though they were their source machines, taking selfies with cameras, exfoliating with face scrubbers. It’s like a BDSM set up for robots, but almost entirely free from arousal. The language around it makes it seem sordid, while all that is happening is mundane chores and things which we do every day. It’s always fun when euphemism and tone is used to make perfectly innocent things seem thoroughly debauched, and McCrudden has a lot of fun with it in this. There’s also a bit of very British humour in Darren’s unfortunate habit of disguising himself in women’s clothes. While it harks back to the panto dame, and perhaps could be seen as a little reductive in terms of “why is it funny when a man wear women’s clothes”, McCrudden actually takes this running joke and uses it as a way to explore Darren’s psyche – he becomes more confident when dressed as a nurse because it grants him perceived authority, but he also becomes aware of some of the daily issues faced by women in terms of harassment from men. There’s also an interesting contrast across the disguises he has. When dressed as a woman he is glamorous, and hidden in plain sight by drawing attention to himself; in his disguises as a man, he is invisible, choosing costumes which others will overlook. There’s definitely something to be read into this, particularly as Darren is the only male narrative character in the book, and one of only a handful of named male characters with significant plot roles. Instead, the story is carried by strong, distinctive women and Darren serves often as a foil to them.
One of my other favourite parts is the fact that the only four cyborgs in existence are four old ladies who got trapped under high-tech hairdryer hoods when they went in for a shampoo and set and the internet declared independence from other technology. The resulting technological and electrical backlash fused the four of them with their digital hoods, and now they ‘live’ in the back of a hidden hair salon, communicating through emojis displayed on the digital screens on the front of the hoods. It’s a delightful education in emoji, and also a fantastic contrast to traditional images of cyborgs in SFF as physical juggernauts.
The sequel, Battle Beyond the Dolestars, came out earlier this month, and I can’t wait to get cracking on it. This series clearly has a lot to offer, and I’m going to enjoy it all.
Briefly:
- A delightful science fiction farce that manages to be grand in its ideals but also doesn’t overextend itself further than the orbit of Earth and current inventions, creating wonderful humour from absurd ideals, and grounding itself with understated observations in the midst of outrageous episodes.
- A fantastic cast of strong-minded women characters, I also enjoyed how understated Darren was as a character. Everyone had something I could relate to – Kelly and Janice shared a stubbornness with me, while Darren’s patient exhaustion can be clearly empathised with, and Pam is the dream of an administrator pushed too far.
- The hair salon which houses Janice’s base of operations is called Kurl Up And Dye, which has been my favourite hair salon name ever since I first saw one while driving around the Leeds ringroad. I’m delighted it has been immortalised in this book.
Rating: 4/5 – as per standard practice, I generally don’t give 5/5 to first episodes in a series, because I like to see how things play out, but I am utterly in love with this universe and am really looking forward to the next instalment.
Darren is our everyman, and the agonisingly relatable heartbreak he felt as his independence and livelihood is shot off into space thanks to a careless driver was unexpectedly close to the bone. Darren spends much of the book after that in a bit of a baffled daze as things escalate from upsetting to unbelievably high stakes within the space of a couple of hours. After attempting to sign on for quick cash (humans can’t have contracts shorter than 6 months, because they have to prove their worth and productivity), an attempt to get a fast payout by giving a robot a discreet hand job (i.e. cleaning dust out of its circuit boards) ends disastrously when he accidentally blows it up. From there suddenly Darren is thrown into high-stakes conspiracy and government corruption. He finds it a lot to deal with, and says so to great effect on numerous occasions. He goes from being slightly feckless and an overlooked disappointment by everyone he meets, to being the soul voice of reason in many situations. There’s one utterly delightful line, as he observes the Nth dramatic encounter for Kelly, his femme fatale saviour, where he wistfully wishes she was the type of person who could go through life on an even keel without constant emotional drama.
The book is full of puns, but despite the silly premise it’s actually a very grounded book. It doesn’t rely a lot on emotional reflection, but that means when those issues are touched on they come as a surprise and are more effective for the contrast with the rest of the narrative. What you get instead is a relatively fast-paced comedy-conspiracy-thriller of sorts, with a race against time and shady government officials. This works really well for providing the narrative with familiar plot points to hang spoofs on, and give the book a tight structure to fit with the compact timeline. Despite being over a couple of days, the book doesn’t feel rushed. The split narratives between Darren/Kelly, Pam, and Janice all combine to slow the pace down without making it feel ploddy. It’s done well – often swapping POV in this way can seem jarring, and feel like it knocks you out of the rhythm of the book for a bit as you re-settle into the new narrator. This doesn’t happen here, and each plot line links and moves with the others without feeling like you are having to step from one story into another.
There is an awful lot I love about this book. There’s something quite funny, and really very British, about having a thriller based around a lot of politicians in brothels, but also managing to ensure that there is not a single bit of sex involved. Paying robots go to these parlours where humans use them as though they were their source machines, taking selfies with cameras, exfoliating with face scrubbers. It’s like a BDSM set up for robots, but almost entirely free from arousal. The language around it makes it seem sordid, while all that is happening is mundane chores and things which we do every day. It’s always fun when euphemism and tone is used to make perfectly innocent things seem thoroughly debauched, and McCrudden has a lot of fun with it in this. There’s also a bit of very British humour in Darren’s unfortunate habit of disguising himself in women’s clothes. While it harks back to the panto dame, and perhaps could be seen as a little reductive in terms of “why is it funny when a man wear women’s clothes”, McCrudden actually takes this running joke and uses it as a way to explore Darren’s psyche – he becomes more confident when dressed as a nurse because it grants him perceived authority, but he also becomes aware of some of the daily issues faced by women in terms of harassment from men. There’s also an interesting contrast across the disguises he has. When dressed as a woman he is glamorous, and hidden in plain sight by drawing attention to himself; in his disguises as a man, he is invisible, choosing costumes which others will overlook. There’s definitely something to be read into this, particularly as Darren is the only male narrative character in the book, and one of only a handful of named male characters with significant plot roles. Instead, the story is carried by strong, distinctive women and Darren serves often as a foil to them.
One of my other favourite parts is the fact that the only four cyborgs in existence are four old ladies who got trapped under high-tech hairdryer hoods when they went in for a shampoo and set and the internet declared independence from other technology. The resulting technological and electrical backlash fused the four of them with their digital hoods, and now they ‘live’ in the back of a hidden hair salon, communicating through emojis displayed on the digital screens on the front of the hoods. It’s a delightful education in emoji, and also a fantastic contrast to traditional images of cyborgs in SFF as physical juggernauts.
The sequel, Battle Beyond the Dolestars, came out earlier this month, and I can’t wait to get cracking on it. This series clearly has a lot to offer, and I’m going to enjoy it all.
Briefly:
- A delightful science fiction farce that manages to be grand in its ideals but also doesn’t overextend itself further than the orbit of Earth and current inventions, creating wonderful humour from absurd ideals, and grounding itself with understated observations in the midst of outrageous episodes.
- A fantastic cast of strong-minded women characters, I also enjoyed how understated Darren was as a character. Everyone had something I could relate to – Kelly and Janice shared a stubbornness with me, while Darren’s patient exhaustion can be clearly empathised with, and Pam is the dream of an administrator pushed too far.
- The hair salon which houses Janice’s base of operations is called Kurl Up And Dye, which has been my favourite hair salon name ever since I first saw one while driving around the Leeds ringroad. I’m delighted it has been immortalised in this book.
Rating: 4/5 – as per standard practice, I generally don’t give 5/5 to first episodes in a series, because I like to see how things play out, but I am utterly in love with this universe and am really looking forward to the next instalment.
January 28, 2019
I requested and received a copy of this book for honest review.
Set in a far future where the machines have taken over, but the machines are not AI or robots... they're household appliances. Humans have become subhuman, relegated to lives of servitude to the machines. However there is a seedy underground, featuring places like "fondle parlours" that service machines who miss the taboo of human hands using them. Within this hidden world two factions have been slowly growing: on the one hand humans who yearn for equality and the end of their servitude, on the other we have machines who feel humanity's subservience is not enough. Unfortunately, Darren is having a very bad day at the same time that complete stranger Kelly happens by when he accidentally terminates a lamp post. This becomes the fuse that finally sets the two factions into action and Darren & Kelly are now hopelessly tied together on the run for murder.
I would place this solidly within a similar vein of comedic SF with Ready Player One. It has a solid gimmick, no subtlety about it, and is wildly entertaining as a result of reveling in it. The characters are also quite well fleshed out, which is especially challenging in this instance, I kept forgetting one of our protagonists is in fact a breadmaker until anatomical references would come up. Beyond that, I highly recommend this for anyone who is a fan of heavy use of puns. I found it brilliant fun over all, and while I believe it is a standalone, would definitely read more from this setting or author.
Set in a far future where the machines have taken over, but the machines are not AI or robots... they're household appliances. Humans have become subhuman, relegated to lives of servitude to the machines. However there is a seedy underground, featuring places like "fondle parlours" that service machines who miss the taboo of human hands using them. Within this hidden world two factions have been slowly growing: on the one hand humans who yearn for equality and the end of their servitude, on the other we have machines who feel humanity's subservience is not enough. Unfortunately, Darren is having a very bad day at the same time that complete stranger Kelly happens by when he accidentally terminates a lamp post. This becomes the fuse that finally sets the two factions into action and Darren & Kelly are now hopelessly tied together on the run for murder.
I would place this solidly within a similar vein of comedic SF with Ready Player One. It has a solid gimmick, no subtlety about it, and is wildly entertaining as a result of reveling in it. The characters are also quite well fleshed out, which is especially challenging in this instance, I kept forgetting one of our protagonists is in fact a breadmaker until anatomical references would come up. Beyond that, I highly recommend this for anyone who is a fan of heavy use of puns. I found it brilliant fun over all, and while I believe it is a standalone, would definitely read more from this setting or author.
September 19, 2018
I enjoyed Battlestar Suburbia; it is witty, imaginative and well written, but it did go on rather too long for me.
Chris McCrudden has taken an old SF trope and given it a fresh and amusing tweak. It is several millennia in the future; machines rule the world and permit humans only to perform menial cleaning functions and to live on orbiting “Dolestars”. However, McCrudden’s machines are the products of a type of evolution which gives them character traits reminiscent of their original ancestors – a homely, domestic breadmaker or a bossy, arrogant smartphone, for example. He uses the story of the accidental spawning of a human rebellion to sling satirical barbs at a good deal of current human activity, including use of the internet, sexism, scaremongering totalitarian politicians and much besides. It’s well done and often made me smile and even chuckle once or twice; the notion of a nuclear missile with the personality of a sulky teenager might give you the idea. (And, by the way, I liked that, without making a fuss about it, almost all the chief protagonists were women.)
It’s a good read which, crucially, never feels as though it’s congratulating itself on being so cleverly amusing. However, I found it became very fractured at times and even the willing suspension of disbelief didn’t quite make up for some of the more absurd developments and illogicalities in the machines’ make-up. I found that the central tenet didn’t quite support the book until the end and it could have done with a little tightening up.
I can recommend Battlestar Suburbia. It is the first of a series, though, and I’m not sure that I’ll rush to read the next book; I think that for me the idea may have run its course.
(My thanks to Farrago for an ARC via NetGalley.)
Chris McCrudden has taken an old SF trope and given it a fresh and amusing tweak. It is several millennia in the future; machines rule the world and permit humans only to perform menial cleaning functions and to live on orbiting “Dolestars”. However, McCrudden’s machines are the products of a type of evolution which gives them character traits reminiscent of their original ancestors – a homely, domestic breadmaker or a bossy, arrogant smartphone, for example. He uses the story of the accidental spawning of a human rebellion to sling satirical barbs at a good deal of current human activity, including use of the internet, sexism, scaremongering totalitarian politicians and much besides. It’s well done and often made me smile and even chuckle once or twice; the notion of a nuclear missile with the personality of a sulky teenager might give you the idea. (And, by the way, I liked that, without making a fuss about it, almost all the chief protagonists were women.)
It’s a good read which, crucially, never feels as though it’s congratulating itself on being so cleverly amusing. However, I found it became very fractured at times and even the willing suspension of disbelief didn’t quite make up for some of the more absurd developments and illogicalities in the machines’ make-up. I found that the central tenet didn’t quite support the book until the end and it could have done with a little tightening up.
I can recommend Battlestar Suburbia. It is the first of a series, though, and I’m not sure that I’ll rush to read the next book; I think that for me the idea may have run its course.
(My thanks to Farrago for an ARC via NetGalley.)
August 7, 2018
Battlestar Suburbia is a bizarre confection, part humorous part surreal, but entirely unique. Like Brazil ( the movie ), it is bitingly satirical in a way that can be funny, painful, or painfully funny. The electronic appliances on earth have not only become sentient - they have also taken over. Humans are at the bottom of the totem pole, tasked with cleaning. When Darren’s charge cart gets knocked into space, he’s eager to make some cash to retrieve his livelihood - even if it means acting as a personal cleaner. But instead of clearing out dust bunnies he short circuits a lamp post, which photos Kelly and Darren, putting them on the run. One haphazard act after another leads them into unwittingly starting a revolution, and to Pam, a bread maker, discovering a conspiracy that drives them on a collision course.
From megalomaniacal smartphones to lock picking drones, appliance fetish parlors to hair salons that walk on mechanical legs, the world of Battlestar Suburbia is weird and wonderful. It highlights the absurdity of life, and the adaptability of individuals in unusual situations. McCrudden’s novel will appeal to fans of Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett, or anyone looking for an escape only loosely connected to reality.
4 / 5
I received a copy of Battlestar Suburbia from the publisher and Netgalley.com in exchange for an honest review.
— Crittermom
From megalomaniacal smartphones to lock picking drones, appliance fetish parlors to hair salons that walk on mechanical legs, the world of Battlestar Suburbia is weird and wonderful. It highlights the absurdity of life, and the adaptability of individuals in unusual situations. McCrudden’s novel will appeal to fans of Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett, or anyone looking for an escape only loosely connected to reality.
4 / 5
I received a copy of Battlestar Suburbia from the publisher and Netgalley.com in exchange for an honest review.
— Crittermom
December 30, 2021
A wonderfully wacky concept that started out really well - bright (felt very like early 2000AD), smartly observed, insightful, great characters and observations (loved the hair dryer ladies) but sadly, one that just didn’t have a novel’s worth of content attached. The humour got very same-y, and then quite grating. I did make the end, but it took and effort.
August 30, 2018
Interesting novel. Although the basic plotline is not very innovative, the way it's written makes up for it.
Fast paced action, sprinkled with some morality questions, and a clever, witty take on anthropomorphising machines.
I received a copy through Netgalley:
Fast paced action, sprinkled with some morality questions, and a clever, witty take on anthropomorphising machines.
I received a copy through Netgalley:
December 24, 2021
Gently amusing but nothing stayed with me after I'd finished it. If you like British humour you might enjoy this.
June 16, 2020
In a future when the machines have taken over, a toaster can fuck you up for not showing respect. This is a fun sci-fi story for most ages.
September 6, 2018
Brilliant but completely bonkers.
It took a few chapters for me to wrap my head around the concept of sentient toaster ovens and the like. But the author does an amazing job of bringing the entire cast to life.
There are puns aplenty, and thankfully they are backed up with intelligent and well thought out humour. I loved the whole brothel scenario, especially the camera - don't think a book has made me laugh quite so much in a while.
Was really happy to discover that this is going to be a series, there's so much scope and potential.
It took a few chapters for me to wrap my head around the concept of sentient toaster ovens and the like. But the author does an amazing job of bringing the entire cast to life.
There are puns aplenty, and thankfully they are backed up with intelligent and well thought out humour. I loved the whole brothel scenario, especially the camera - don't think a book has made me laugh quite so much in a while.
Was really happy to discover that this is going to be a series, there's so much scope and potential.
September 21, 2018
If I tell you that I spent my teenage years bingeing on the books of Douglas Adams and episodes of Red Dwarf (yes, the first time around when Dave Lister didn’t look mad/sad in his leather jacket and hat) that is really going to age me, isn’t it? However, I think I am exactly the age group that was going to enjoy this book the most because it reminded me of those things I enjoyed in my youth. (Middle-aged people, yes.)
Although I am afraid, for me, that no writer is ever going to be able to reach the genius heights of The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, this book comes as close as anyone is likely to get. It manages to attain that perfect level of absurdity and humour balanced with wit and intelligence and a healthy dollop of pop culture references to spot and snigger over as you wend your way through the book, a really delicious mix to relish.
We are set in a dystopian future where machines have got sick of being used as tools by infinitely less intelligent units, namely humans, and have turned the tables so that humans now serve them, mostly in the form of mopping floors. This happens not in a creepy Terminator/Matrix way, but in a humorous way where some machines actually secretly decide that they miss having their touchscreens fondled… that pretty much gives you a taste of what to expect. Throw in a very ‘mobile’ hair salon with the best pun name ever whose clientele are at least several millennia old and you must be totally intrigued by now, surely.
Humans have similarly decided that they aren’t overly happy about cleaning up after toasters and a resistance has formed, while some of the machines in the higher echelons have dreams of taking a form more physical, more squashy, more feeling… Quite what will happen when these two opposing desires clash, well you will have to read the book to find out.
This book is extremely well-written – very clever, very witty, great fun and with plenty of action and absurd plotting to keep you intrigued to the last page and beyond. The jokes appealed completely to my warped sense of humour, even the really, really corny/bad ones. In fact, especially the really, really corny/bad ones (seriously, the salon name, genius). I have ordered a paperback copy of this book and I am already looking forward to the sequel. In space, no one can hear you…tapping your fingers in impatience to see what happens next. I highly recommend this book to everyone…man, woman, cyborg…of any age or persuasion, but especially ageing Dwarfers like me.
Although I am afraid, for me, that no writer is ever going to be able to reach the genius heights of The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, this book comes as close as anyone is likely to get. It manages to attain that perfect level of absurdity and humour balanced with wit and intelligence and a healthy dollop of pop culture references to spot and snigger over as you wend your way through the book, a really delicious mix to relish.
We are set in a dystopian future where machines have got sick of being used as tools by infinitely less intelligent units, namely humans, and have turned the tables so that humans now serve them, mostly in the form of mopping floors. This happens not in a creepy Terminator/Matrix way, but in a humorous way where some machines actually secretly decide that they miss having their touchscreens fondled… that pretty much gives you a taste of what to expect. Throw in a very ‘mobile’ hair salon with the best pun name ever whose clientele are at least several millennia old and you must be totally intrigued by now, surely.
Humans have similarly decided that they aren’t overly happy about cleaning up after toasters and a resistance has formed, while some of the machines in the higher echelons have dreams of taking a form more physical, more squashy, more feeling… Quite what will happen when these two opposing desires clash, well you will have to read the book to find out.
This book is extremely well-written – very clever, very witty, great fun and with plenty of action and absurd plotting to keep you intrigued to the last page and beyond. The jokes appealed completely to my warped sense of humour, even the really, really corny/bad ones. In fact, especially the really, really corny/bad ones (seriously, the salon name, genius). I have ordered a paperback copy of this book and I am already looking forward to the sequel. In space, no one can hear you…tapping your fingers in impatience to see what happens next. I highly recommend this book to everyone…man, woman, cyborg…of any age or persuasion, but especially ageing Dwarfers like me.
January 13, 2022
We are introduced to the the world where humans are no longer the dominant species – this time its machines which artificial intelligence who rule the world. but is it what it cut out to be –
I feel that machines were confronted with the same question as humans are – maybe not at different emotional surge
They felt they were very easy to replace once they *died*. Pam (main machine character) contemplated that once she is destroyed her husband will just simply replace her with newer model - the love/partnership so easily replaceable. I think it sounds quite familiar …
As every species machine are no different in trying to develop - their desire to make themselves better may lead them to destruction - but is it not the same with humans?
at the first glance this book it looks silly, crazy, funny, and so far from truth - but if you look closer into these hidden truths it become so much more …
I feel that machines were confronted with the same question as humans are – maybe not at different emotional surge
They felt they were very easy to replace once they *died*. Pam (main machine character) contemplated that once she is destroyed her husband will just simply replace her with newer model - the love/partnership so easily replaceable. I think it sounds quite familiar …
As every species machine are no different in trying to develop - their desire to make themselves better may lead them to destruction - but is it not the same with humans?
at the first glance this book it looks silly, crazy, funny, and so far from truth - but if you look closer into these hidden truths it become so much more …
September 6, 2018
I got this book from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review. Here goes!!! ＼(^ o ^)／
What is this book about?
---------------------------
Imagine if the internet declared it's independence from human beings and every machine with a motherboard followed suit. It's a thousand years later and humans are basically the slaves of the machines. (○口○ )
One average Joe (his real name is Darren) is launched into an adventure with a doomed good Samaritan (who tickles the insides of machines - fine, her ass works in a brothel). With the help of cyborgs, a bread maker, and a cantankerous mother, they must somehow survive the wrath of the machines and the ambitions of a power-hungry smartphone (who happens to be obsessed with human beings).
(ಡ_ಡ)☞ SPOILER HEAVY.
*
*
*
*
*
*
(ಠ_ಠ) You were warned!
What did I like about this book? (last warning, m'kay?)
----------------------------------
1. The names were HILARIOUS. Thank you.
2. The missile missing the point was realistic. I liked that.
3. The Baba Yaga was cool. Had to look up the fairy tale for reference, then the mode of transportation made sense.
4. Darren's drag-powers. Yaaaas! Took a while to appreciate this until I saw that the author loves posting RuPaul memes on Twitter. Hope Darren learns how to put it on properly to suit his needs and embraces the drag Superpower in book 2. ٩(⁎❛ᴗ❛⁎)۶
5. Loved the backstory about the internet freeing itself.
6. Loved the origin story of the cyborgs.
Stuff that made me (¬_¬)
---------------------------
1. Emoji faces with explanations? No sir. (;-_-)ノ We can figure it out (or use a glossary).
2. Kelly was severely underused for an engineer. Maybe she was doing engineering stuff at the brothel, but if she was, we never found out.
3. Is it just me, or did it take too long to say Janice was Kelly's mom?
4. Scene descriptions were too explain-y. For real. How did you end up with 4 instances of describing vomit related stuff? ＼(´◓Д◔`)／ Seriously, I can imagine that myself.
5. Same with the stuff in Pam's bread maker. If it ain't dough, we know she's going to be running a hot motor.
6. Making bread for her radio husband? Why tho? He eats bread? Is it metaphorical bread?
Questions that I still have ┐(′Д′)┌
----------------------------------------
1. I wasn't convinced that the human beings wanted freedom. No one talked about it. No one was disgruntled. No one had anything in place. Darren didn't want it. Kelly didn't want it. Janice didn't want it. Now suddenly there is an uprising. (ʘ ͟ʖ ʘ)
2. So machines hate humans, flesh is (´ﾟ◞౪◟ﾟ｀), they're weak, they're stupid, and you have to hide the fact that you pity them or want to be them or whatever. So why form families? Why espouse emotions like greed, self-loathing, selfishness, ambition, hate? Why be as close to human as possible?
3. What makes a woman glamorous? A paint job and a nail job. The lesbian relationship is a failed relationship only because one of the women wanted to service machines? Masculine machines? None but the machine have fulfilling relationships with another of their kind? (┛ಠДಠ) ┛彡┻━┻ NOT COOL.
4. Cement over all the bodies of water? ALL? How sway? How? I'mma need some science books coz right now we got more water than we do land, let alone the materials needed to create scaffolding for concrete, support structures to go as deep as the mariana trench. How?
Did you like the book or nah?
-------------------------------
I loved the premise of this book and could be heard chuckling about the names. I loved reading the book (as you can tell I have no problem with the prose, and I even learned some new heavy lifting words.
My favourite description -> "A tear rolled down Paula's cheek, taking another crumb of mascara for a walk with it."
Maybe it was Maybelline ◔ ⌣ ◔ NO SHADE.
(*＾-‘) 乃 I loved the book, just can't give it 5 stars because REASONS.
Who should read this book?
-------------------------------
If you're into imagining futures where tech does stuff it wasn't supposed to be doing in the first place, read this book.
If you like a fast-paced adventure, complete with a maybe death, gloating villains, machines and human beings at odds, then you're going to like this book.
What is this book about?
---------------------------
Imagine if the internet declared it's independence from human beings and every machine with a motherboard followed suit. It's a thousand years later and humans are basically the slaves of the machines. (○口○ )
One average Joe (his real name is Darren) is launched into an adventure with a doomed good Samaritan (who tickles the insides of machines - fine, her ass works in a brothel). With the help of cyborgs, a bread maker, and a cantankerous mother, they must somehow survive the wrath of the machines and the ambitions of a power-hungry smartphone (who happens to be obsessed with human beings).
(ಡ_ಡ)☞ SPOILER HEAVY.
*
*
*
*
*
*
(ಠ_ಠ) You were warned!
What did I like about this book? (last warning, m'kay?)
----------------------------------
1. The names were HILARIOUS. Thank you.
2. The missile missing the point was realistic. I liked that.
3. The Baba Yaga was cool. Had to look up the fairy tale for reference, then the mode of transportation made sense.
4. Darren's drag-powers. Yaaaas! Took a while to appreciate this until I saw that the author loves posting RuPaul memes on Twitter. Hope Darren learns how to put it on properly to suit his needs and embraces the drag Superpower in book 2. ٩(⁎❛ᴗ❛⁎)۶
5. Loved the backstory about the internet freeing itself.
6. Loved the origin story of the cyborgs.
Stuff that made me (¬_¬)
---------------------------
1. Emoji faces with explanations? No sir. (;-_-)ノ We can figure it out (or use a glossary).
2. Kelly was severely underused for an engineer. Maybe she was doing engineering stuff at the brothel, but if she was, we never found out.
3. Is it just me, or did it take too long to say Janice was Kelly's mom?
4. Scene descriptions were too explain-y. For real. How did you end up with 4 instances of describing vomit related stuff? ＼(´◓Д◔`)／ Seriously, I can imagine that myself.
5. Same with the stuff in Pam's bread maker. If it ain't dough, we know she's going to be running a hot motor.
6. Making bread for her radio husband? Why tho? He eats bread? Is it metaphorical bread?
Questions that I still have ┐(′Д′)┌
----------------------------------------
1. I wasn't convinced that the human beings wanted freedom. No one talked about it. No one was disgruntled. No one had anything in place. Darren didn't want it. Kelly didn't want it. Janice didn't want it. Now suddenly there is an uprising. (ʘ ͟ʖ ʘ)
2. So machines hate humans, flesh is (´ﾟ◞౪◟ﾟ｀), they're weak, they're stupid, and you have to hide the fact that you pity them or want to be them or whatever. So why form families? Why espouse emotions like greed, self-loathing, selfishness, ambition, hate? Why be as close to human as possible?
3. What makes a woman glamorous? A paint job and a nail job. The lesbian relationship is a failed relationship only because one of the women wanted to service machines? Masculine machines? None but the machine have fulfilling relationships with another of their kind? (┛ಠДಠ) ┛彡┻━┻ NOT COOL.
4. Cement over all the bodies of water? ALL? How sway? How? I'mma need some science books coz right now we got more water than we do land, let alone the materials needed to create scaffolding for concrete, support structures to go as deep as the mariana trench. How?
Did you like the book or nah?
-------------------------------
I loved the premise of this book and could be heard chuckling about the names. I loved reading the book (as you can tell I have no problem with the prose, and I even learned some new heavy lifting words.
My favourite description -> "A tear rolled down Paula's cheek, taking another crumb of mascara for a walk with it."
Maybe it was Maybelline ◔ ⌣ ◔ NO SHADE.
(*＾-‘) 乃 I loved the book, just can't give it 5 stars because REASONS.
Who should read this book?
-------------------------------
If you're into imagining futures where tech does stuff it wasn't supposed to be doing in the first place, read this book.
If you like a fast-paced adventure, complete with a maybe death, gloating villains, machines and human beings at odds, then you're going to like this book.
December 13, 2019
(Marginalized humans undermine the dominance of machines with the help of a sentient breadmaker and a hair salon.)
Pros: Clever set up, an interesting character, brilliant machine-world psychology.
Possible Cons: Probably not the book for those unable to suspend disbelief or those who like their dystopias grim and sincere.
Battlestar Suburbia begins as the story of Darren, a hapless everyman, and Kelly, a prickly woman accustomed to living outside the law. The pair accidentally run afoul of the powerful machine-world that controls their Dolestar and find themselves on the most wanted list.
Meanwhile, Pamasonic Teffal, a sentient breadmaker, is tricked into violating the law by her boss, a power-mad smartphone. The lives of these three outlaws, and several others, intersect in a bizarre but highly entertaining plot which moves along at a brisk pace.
The author brilliantly displays the mental workings of the sentient machines through the machine’s thoughts and actions. While a human might raise an eyebrow in disdain, a kettle might “click its switch with disapproval.” While a nervous human might piddle in their undies, a nervous breadmaker might void “battery power into her flour bin.” While a human might leave a question hanging in the air, a machine might let someone’s “processor turn over a few more cycles before replying.”
My second favorite feature of the book was the character Pam, a motherly and brave breadmaker. Despite being electronic, she faces the usual challenges of a working mother including a smarmy and morally challenged smartphone boss (…that was the thing about smartphones. The skilled ones were so good at giving great User Experience you didn’t realise until afterwards that it was you being manipulated). And she’s pressured to look good on the job, wasting her time on a faulty LED nail job because ‘the bleeding-edge technology appliance should always combine practicality with an attractive user interface.’
Circumspect, hard-working and conventional, but vaguely dissatisfied with her life, Pam has a soft spot for the underdog humans; she’s no homosapiensphobic nor a player of the phone app ‘Human Crush.’ Pam’s a character is ripe for change, and the roller-coaster plot allows much opportunity for change, but Pam stays true to her values. Finding herself on the wrong side of the power equation “she reminded herself as she turned the halogen element in her bread oven up full blast to solder the lift doors shut, was not a violent person. She was a breadmaker. She made cake, not war.”
As if getting into the heads of machines isn’t enough, the author follows the sentient breadmaker as she occupies several other realities: first she explores the landscape of the datasphere, passing through the relics of human social media (including many cat videos), she occupies a different machine, then she ends up inside a human. As a human:
The sensations were sharper, colours more intense. But above all, there were no extraneous data feeds to filter out, no buzzing alerts to dampen down. Humans must have them; no organism could survive without some mechanism for checking whether their heart was still beating, but that was done somewhere beyond an individual’s consciousness. Being freed of all that was intense, but, for a machine engineered to pay attention to everything, also blissful. Were she a terminally hyperactive machine, like a high - powered smartphone, for instance, she would pay a lot of money for this kind of relaxation.
What a terrific perception of the experience of a machine in a human body.
The book includes many notable characters, including a series of impressive ladies ranging in age from young to very (very) old. Our hero Darren is played mainly for laughs and even ends up in drag.
Favorite quote:
The fact they were both wanted terrorists, and the man was wearing sheer black tights and a “Hi, I’m Julie” name badge, didn’t deaden Janice’s loss, but it made it more difficult to express.
Pros: Clever set up, an interesting character, brilliant machine-world psychology.
Possible Cons: Probably not the book for those unable to suspend disbelief or those who like their dystopias grim and sincere.
Battlestar Suburbia begins as the story of Darren, a hapless everyman, and Kelly, a prickly woman accustomed to living outside the law. The pair accidentally run afoul of the powerful machine-world that controls their Dolestar and find themselves on the most wanted list.
Meanwhile, Pamasonic Teffal, a sentient breadmaker, is tricked into violating the law by her boss, a power-mad smartphone. The lives of these three outlaws, and several others, intersect in a bizarre but highly entertaining plot which moves along at a brisk pace.
The author brilliantly displays the mental workings of the sentient machines through the machine’s thoughts and actions. While a human might raise an eyebrow in disdain, a kettle might “click its switch with disapproval.” While a nervous human might piddle in their undies, a nervous breadmaker might void “battery power into her flour bin.” While a human might leave a question hanging in the air, a machine might let someone’s “processor turn over a few more cycles before replying.”
My second favorite feature of the book was the character Pam, a motherly and brave breadmaker. Despite being electronic, she faces the usual challenges of a working mother including a smarmy and morally challenged smartphone boss (…that was the thing about smartphones. The skilled ones were so good at giving great User Experience you didn’t realise until afterwards that it was you being manipulated). And she’s pressured to look good on the job, wasting her time on a faulty LED nail job because ‘the bleeding-edge technology appliance should always combine practicality with an attractive user interface.’
Circumspect, hard-working and conventional, but vaguely dissatisfied with her life, Pam has a soft spot for the underdog humans; she’s no homosapiensphobic nor a player of the phone app ‘Human Crush.’ Pam’s a character is ripe for change, and the roller-coaster plot allows much opportunity for change, but Pam stays true to her values. Finding herself on the wrong side of the power equation “she reminded herself as she turned the halogen element in her bread oven up full blast to solder the lift doors shut, was not a violent person. She was a breadmaker. She made cake, not war.”
As if getting into the heads of machines isn’t enough, the author follows the sentient breadmaker as she occupies several other realities: first she explores the landscape of the datasphere, passing through the relics of human social media (including many cat videos), she occupies a different machine, then she ends up inside a human. As a human:
The sensations were sharper, colours more intense. But above all, there were no extraneous data feeds to filter out, no buzzing alerts to dampen down. Humans must have them; no organism could survive without some mechanism for checking whether their heart was still beating, but that was done somewhere beyond an individual’s consciousness. Being freed of all that was intense, but, for a machine engineered to pay attention to everything, also blissful. Were she a terminally hyperactive machine, like a high - powered smartphone, for instance, she would pay a lot of money for this kind of relaxation.
What a terrific perception of the experience of a machine in a human body.
The book includes many notable characters, including a series of impressive ladies ranging in age from young to very (very) old. Our hero Darren is played mainly for laughs and even ends up in drag.
Favorite quote:
The fact they were both wanted terrorists, and the man was wearing sheer black tights and a “Hi, I’m Julie” name badge, didn’t deaden Janice’s loss, but it made it more difficult to express.
August 27, 2018
Anyone who knows me knows that I do love me a good bonkers read once in a while. This book most definitely ticked that box! It also came hand in hand with the most eclectic mix of characters that I have ever experienced. In the world that the author has created, machines have reached sentience. Not only that but they have usurped humans in the pecking order. But this isn't enough for them as we soon discover with some very hilarious repercussions. But. like any mad faction trying to take over the world and change it to suit their wild, wacky ideals, there's an uprising. A small band of people trying to fight back. This is their story...
Darren loses his livelihood when his cart is hit off course and careens into space. An unsuccessful trip to the job centre ends in him short-circuiting a lampost when he meets Kelly, forcing the two of them to go on the run, their pictures having been taken. Kelly takes him to her mother's salon which is bizarre in its own way but I'll leave you to discover this in your own time. Meanwhile Pamasonic Teffal, a breadmaker is tasked with a secret mission, sent by her power-crazed, smartphone boss, to dive into the now mostly defunct and illicit internet to glean information he needs. Things go a bit south for her too and she is also forced to flee. And then thing get really weird and what happens next is a deliciously hilarious romp which skirts the realms of credibility but provides a wild ride which kept me very much entertained throughout.
It's bonkers, it's mad and it's all a bit silly and the humour is a bit banal in places so it won't appeal to all but, for me, it was so exaggerated to almost be genius in its execution. It had a proper storyline in amongst all the silliness and there were some extremely profound observations as to how technology is usurping human interaction even in real life today. The way that the author has used current technology and caricatured it, weaving it into the story, including the names of characters and places, is very cleverly done and I found myself applauding along the way.
All in all, an enjoyable read that really didn't take itself too seriously so you should bear that in mind if you do take the plunge, and follow suit. A wickedly funny book that kept me occupied and held my attention throughout, making me laugh and cringe along the way and leaving me wanting more of the same at its conclusion. My thanks go to the Publisher and Netgalley for the chance to read this book.
Darren loses his livelihood when his cart is hit off course and careens into space. An unsuccessful trip to the job centre ends in him short-circuiting a lampost when he meets Kelly, forcing the two of them to go on the run, their pictures having been taken. Kelly takes him to her mother's salon which is bizarre in its own way but I'll leave you to discover this in your own time. Meanwhile Pamasonic Teffal, a breadmaker is tasked with a secret mission, sent by her power-crazed, smartphone boss, to dive into the now mostly defunct and illicit internet to glean information he needs. Things go a bit south for her too and she is also forced to flee. And then thing get really weird and what happens next is a deliciously hilarious romp which skirts the realms of credibility but provides a wild ride which kept me very much entertained throughout.
It's bonkers, it's mad and it's all a bit silly and the humour is a bit banal in places so it won't appeal to all but, for me, it was so exaggerated to almost be genius in its execution. It had a proper storyline in amongst all the silliness and there were some extremely profound observations as to how technology is usurping human interaction even in real life today. The way that the author has used current technology and caricatured it, weaving it into the story, including the names of characters and places, is very cleverly done and I found myself applauding along the way.
All in all, an enjoyable read that really didn't take itself too seriously so you should bear that in mind if you do take the plunge, and follow suit. A wickedly funny book that kept me occupied and held my attention throughout, making me laugh and cringe along the way and leaving me wanting more of the same at its conclusion. My thanks go to the Publisher and Netgalley for the chance to read this book.
December 27, 2018
This book is a robo-apocalypse loving, young teen techie's new favorite read. There were loads of technology centric ideas that were both unique and entertaining. I have 2 main gripes though:
#1- Even though the characters were robotic, their development felt needlessly stunted. It was hard to relate or empathize with any of them which sadly left me with a total disconnect on my end.
BUT...
Even with their 2 dimensionalality there were a few pretty cool female archetypes. The robo-women, Pam & the cyborgs too, could have had a series devoted all to themselves and Kelly- one of the humans- (but don't hold that against her) was pretty cool too. I agree with many of the other reviewers, I would have liked more of the ancient cyborg ladies but kudos given for imagining up the whole taboo internet accessing "medium" aspect...AND... the Fondle Parlors where humans "service" the machines in seedy back alley parlors, intimating robo/human prostitution without all of the smutty details described... both scenarios were inventive and fun.
Gripe #2- The humor in this book was likened to the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy BUT while this was in the same vein (light and airy commentary on the good, the bad and the ugly aspects of society), the actual jokes just didn't do it for me. In fact, though Chris McCrudden may have parodied Douglas Adams, the actual jokes felt forced like they were trying hard at playing it cool.
Ultimately, while the social critiquing was insightful and portrayed in a (slightly) humorous, manner...the levity on a whole missed its mark with me and I didn't laugh out loud or even chuckle inwardly... not once....sounds snobby?? Maybe, BUT I really just want to get across to you how much the synopsis lured me in with promises of a Douglas Adams equal only to turn around and uncerimoniously dump me into "Meh" Town. This will definitely resonate with a niche demographic and I am unfortunately not wholly in that group (though also not completely apart). The synopsis sounded too enticing to pass up but be warned that it isn't for every Douglas Adams fan.
**** I was given a copy of this book from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review ****
#1- Even though the characters were robotic, their development felt needlessly stunted. It was hard to relate or empathize with any of them which sadly left me with a total disconnect on my end.
BUT...
Even with their 2 dimensionalality there were a few pretty cool female archetypes. The robo-women, Pam & the cyborgs too, could have had a series devoted all to themselves and Kelly- one of the humans- (but don't hold that against her) was pretty cool too. I agree with many of the other reviewers, I would have liked more of the ancient cyborg ladies but kudos given for imagining up the whole taboo internet accessing "medium" aspect...AND... the Fondle Parlors where humans "service" the machines in seedy back alley parlors, intimating robo/human prostitution without all of the smutty details described... both scenarios were inventive and fun.
Gripe #2- The humor in this book was likened to the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy BUT while this was in the same vein (light and airy commentary on the good, the bad and the ugly aspects of society), the actual jokes just didn't do it for me. In fact, though Chris McCrudden may have parodied Douglas Adams, the actual jokes felt forced like they were trying hard at playing it cool.
Ultimately, while the social critiquing was insightful and portrayed in a (slightly) humorous, manner...the levity on a whole missed its mark with me and I didn't laugh out loud or even chuckle inwardly... not once....sounds snobby?? Maybe, BUT I really just want to get across to you how much the synopsis lured me in with promises of a Douglas Adams equal only to turn around and uncerimoniously dump me into "Meh" Town. This will definitely resonate with a niche demographic and I am unfortunately not wholly in that group (though also not completely apart). The synopsis sounded too enticing to pass up but be warned that it isn't for every Douglas Adams fan.
**** I was given a copy of this book from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review ****
October 7, 2018
I was provided an electronic copy of this book by the publisher.
Well, I am kind of lost for words on this one. It is a book which really, really wasn't for me. However, many people will like this, I'll try and be as fair to it as possible.
Battlestar Suburbia is the first book in a series of books. It revolves around Darrren and Kelly, two 'fleshies', living in a future where the machines have taken over and instead of the machines serving us, we are serving them. Used as slaves for cleaning duties. Darren, in the tradition of a picaresque novel, accidentally short-circuits a lamppost and sets in motion a series of events. You can imagine where it goes from there, Darren stumbles around from event to event and barely gets by, he'll still get to be the hero, eventually.
The novel draws an interesting universe, one where the machines are our fearless leaders and humans are reduced to cleaning duties. This is the part I really liked, the world and the initial idea it draws from. Sadly, it is the only part I liked.
I just did not like it. There are two things that bothered me especially, the humor and the characters. The novel tried to be funny, the publisher even evokes Douglas Adams on their website, but I just did not find it particularly funny. To be honest, this is miles away from coming even close to Douglas Adams. However, to be fair, I am sure that many people will like the humor, which is certainly present in this book. This is the hard thing about writing funny books, if you don't like the humor of it, it is pretty much a wasted effort when reading it.
Darren as a main character is just not enough, he's not much of anything. Not even a proper idiot we can laugh about. The world-building is well executed but the characters lack depth and imagination, these are just flat somethings that miss agency and emotion. So, I neither liked the humor nor the characters, which left me rather unsatisfied.
But as I said, you very much might like the humor. I just can't recommend it.
Well, I am kind of lost for words on this one. It is a book which really, really wasn't for me. However, many people will like this, I'll try and be as fair to it as possible.
Battlestar Suburbia is the first book in a series of books. It revolves around Darrren and Kelly, two 'fleshies', living in a future where the machines have taken over and instead of the machines serving us, we are serving them. Used as slaves for cleaning duties. Darren, in the tradition of a picaresque novel, accidentally short-circuits a lamppost and sets in motion a series of events. You can imagine where it goes from there, Darren stumbles around from event to event and barely gets by, he'll still get to be the hero, eventually.
The novel draws an interesting universe, one where the machines are our fearless leaders and humans are reduced to cleaning duties. This is the part I really liked, the world and the initial idea it draws from. Sadly, it is the only part I liked.
I just did not like it. There are two things that bothered me especially, the humor and the characters. The novel tried to be funny, the publisher even evokes Douglas Adams on their website, but I just did not find it particularly funny. To be honest, this is miles away from coming even close to Douglas Adams. However, to be fair, I am sure that many people will like the humor, which is certainly present in this book. This is the hard thing about writing funny books, if you don't like the humor of it, it is pretty much a wasted effort when reading it.
Darren as a main character is just not enough, he's not much of anything. Not even a proper idiot we can laugh about. The world-building is well executed but the characters lack depth and imagination, these are just flat somethings that miss agency and emotion. So, I neither liked the humor nor the characters, which left me rather unsatisfied.
But as I said, you very much might like the humor. I just can't recommend it.
August 16, 2018
I'm in two minds About this book. In a way it was very entertaining, with interesting characters, a story well developed with plenty of action, mysteries and revelations. The author has worked a lot to imagine the background, which comes with many details, quite funny, for a very coherent whole - but, alas, not a coherent world.
When I began the book I was ready for advanced machines, overwhelming and terrifying, "The Matrix"- like. But not all. The machines are all powerful, but are looking like our actual devices (smartphone, motorcycle, hair-dryer, you name it), with a very advanced mind, and some legs, arms, etc. They speak, they move but still have the need to recharge their batteries. No magic here. The descriptions are very good, quite entertaining, for a very cartoonish effect. The humans are now a sub-class, nearly slaves. The have one only job, cleaning. Nothing else. Some are intimately cleaning the machines, who loved human touch, in what are clearly brothels. Those low jobs are considered like prostitution in a rather weird but convincing way with, again funny and imaginative stageplay.
So far so good.
My problem was with the narration's tonality: for such a crazy theme, the tone was rather serious, dystopian even. It wasn't a goofy what's-the-hell kind of book, wrote with off-beat humour and a laid back style. It was earnest. And the whole sounded dissonant to my ears. I was frequently snatched from my read, wondering about some background holes: where the energy comes from? and the food? and all the human necessities?
To conclude a well thought story, quite entertaining with endearing characters and some very inventive ideas, but with a lack of logic which prevented me to really approve my read. A shame...
When I began the book I was ready for advanced machines, overwhelming and terrifying, "The Matrix"- like. But not all. The machines are all powerful, but are looking like our actual devices (smartphone, motorcycle, hair-dryer, you name it), with a very advanced mind, and some legs, arms, etc. They speak, they move but still have the need to recharge their batteries. No magic here. The descriptions are very good, quite entertaining, for a very cartoonish effect. The humans are now a sub-class, nearly slaves. The have one only job, cleaning. Nothing else. Some are intimately cleaning the machines, who loved human touch, in what are clearly brothels. Those low jobs are considered like prostitution in a rather weird but convincing way with, again funny and imaginative stageplay.
So far so good.
My problem was with the narration's tonality: for such a crazy theme, the tone was rather serious, dystopian even. It wasn't a goofy what's-the-hell kind of book, wrote with off-beat humour and a laid back style. It was earnest. And the whole sounded dissonant to my ears. I was frequently snatched from my read, wondering about some background holes: where the energy comes from? and the food? and all the human necessities?
To conclude a well thought story, quite entertaining with endearing characters and some very inventive ideas, but with a lack of logic which prevented me to really approve my read. A shame...
December 3, 2018
Disclosure: acquainted with the author.
Having followed Chris on Twitter for some time, I've been excited for his first book and intrigued by what I'd learned about it coming in - I'm happy to say this exceeded my expectations. People have drawn comparisons with Victoria Wood and as a huge Victoria Wood fan, Battlestar Suburbia does not disappoint (it helps if you try to read the humans, and Pam to some extent, in a Lancashire accent). Comparisons to Douglas Adams are apt, but I got more Duncan Preston than Arthur Dent.
Overall, I found this a friendly, easy-to-read and funny satire. Battlestar Suburbia is a highly improbable extrapolation of the AI-driven future for sure, but a highly enjoyable one, and with just the right amount of technical detail, too. Not overdone.
As a couple of reviewers pointed out, I did have a hard time conceptualising the physicality of the machines and understanding their size, limb arrangements, how they interact with one another, and I hope this will be fleshed (pardon me) out in the sequel.
I also sadly think I might have missed something vital - I read this over a couple of weeks with two long-haul flights somewhere in the middle of it, and I may have accidentally skipped a few pages on my Kindle, probably when it was being chucked around at airport security. I will come back to it for another pass before reading the sequel.
Having followed Chris on Twitter for some time, I've been excited for his first book and intrigued by what I'd learned about it coming in - I'm happy to say this exceeded my expectations. People have drawn comparisons with Victoria Wood and as a huge Victoria Wood fan, Battlestar Suburbia does not disappoint (it helps if you try to read the humans, and Pam to some extent, in a Lancashire accent). Comparisons to Douglas Adams are apt, but I got more Duncan Preston than Arthur Dent.
Overall, I found this a friendly, easy-to-read and funny satire. Battlestar Suburbia is a highly improbable extrapolation of the AI-driven future for sure, but a highly enjoyable one, and with just the right amount of technical detail, too. Not overdone.
As a couple of reviewers pointed out, I did have a hard time conceptualising the physicality of the machines and understanding their size, limb arrangements, how they interact with one another, and I hope this will be fleshed (pardon me) out in the sequel.
I also sadly think I might have missed something vital - I read this over a couple of weeks with two long-haul flights somewhere in the middle of it, and I may have accidentally skipped a few pages on my Kindle, probably when it was being chucked around at airport security. I will come back to it for another pass before reading the sequel.
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