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Broken Beauty: Piecing Together Lives Shattered by Early-Onset Alzheimer's
#1 NEW RELEASE IN CHRISTIAN FAITH AND AGING PARENTS & ELDERCARE AMAZON BESTSELLER IN DEMENTIA AND ALZHEIMER'S DISEASE
In the world of Early-onset Alzheimer’s, here is a book all about life, love, and hope.
Broken Beauty is the story of Sarah Smith’s mother—known as “Beauty” to her family—and her family’s journey through the devastating world of Early-onset Alzheimer’s. Smith was a young mother in her thirties when her own mother’s illness struck, so the family’s shock and pain at the disease’s manifestations is nearly unbearable. Not only is Beauty still young and fit; she is also Sarah’s best friend. This powerful and personal story about a daughter facing the unthinkable and the love she found to carry her through will touch the hearts of everyone who reads it.
Sarah Bearden Smith is a housewife, mother of three, and a woman of deep faith, who has lived in Texas all her life. Sarah was born and raised in the Houston area, and remained there until her departure for the University of Texas at Austin, where she was a speech communications major, varsity cheerleader, and a member of Tri Delta sorority. After her marriage to Thad Smith in 2002, the couple moved to Dallas, Texas. During their years in Dallas, Sarah and her husband have served on various boards and committees, including the Greer Garson Gala, Presbyterian Hospital Healthcare Foundation, East-West Ministries, AWARE Dallas, and Providence Christian School of Texas. They actively serve with their children in assisted living and memory care facilities and support organizations such as Council for Life, Alzheimer’s Association, Women’s Alzheimer’s Movement, and Community Bible Study. Sarah and her family are members of Watermark Community Church.
In the world of Early-onset Alzheimer’s, here is a book all about life, love, and hope.
Broken Beauty is the story of Sarah Smith’s mother—known as “Beauty” to her family—and her family’s journey through the devastating world of Early-onset Alzheimer’s. Smith was a young mother in her thirties when her own mother’s illness struck, so the family’s shock and pain at the disease’s manifestations is nearly unbearable. Not only is Beauty still young and fit; she is also Sarah’s best friend. This powerful and personal story about a daughter facing the unthinkable and the love she found to carry her through will touch the hearts of everyone who reads it.
Sarah Bearden Smith is a housewife, mother of three, and a woman of deep faith, who has lived in Texas all her life. Sarah was born and raised in the Houston area, and remained there until her departure for the University of Texas at Austin, where she was a speech communications major, varsity cheerleader, and a member of Tri Delta sorority. After her marriage to Thad Smith in 2002, the couple moved to Dallas, Texas. During their years in Dallas, Sarah and her husband have served on various boards and committees, including the Greer Garson Gala, Presbyterian Hospital Healthcare Foundation, East-West Ministries, AWARE Dallas, and Providence Christian School of Texas. They actively serve with their children in assisted living and memory care facilities and support organizations such as Council for Life, Alzheimer’s Association, Women’s Alzheimer’s Movement, and Community Bible Study. Sarah and her family are members of Watermark Community Church.
336 pages, Paperback
Published January 15, 2019
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1163 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 46 reviews
February 9, 2019
I won this book in a Goodreads giveaway and am happy to provide a review.
Sarah Smith's story of the battle her mother faced (along with all of her loved ones) after a devastating diagnosis of early onset Alzheimer's is an amazingly honest look at the effects this disease has on not only the person who has the disease, but the struggle family members face as they slowly lose a loved one, one tiny piece at a time.
The book does not shy away from telling it exactly like it is, nor should it. Alzheimer's does more than remove memories - it peels away a person, layer by layer, and it is devastating to watch. Not only will a loved one begin forgetting the most basic things, personalities change . A laid back, happy person can become extremely frustrated (understandable), irrational, and demanding. I know because I've witnessed this. I am not sure if it's because we have more avenues for communication, or if Alzheimer's and dementia are on the rise, but it seems to me I am hearing more and more about people being diagnosed.
That being said, early onset Alzheimer's is quite possibly the worst of the worst, robbing younger people of their futures, and sending family members into a tailspin.
Even so, this book is not all doom and gloom. It is also love, hope, resilience, bravery, and faith. It is a must read.
Sarah Smith's story of the battle her mother faced (along with all of her loved ones) after a devastating diagnosis of early onset Alzheimer's is an amazingly honest look at the effects this disease has on not only the person who has the disease, but the struggle family members face as they slowly lose a loved one, one tiny piece at a time.
The book does not shy away from telling it exactly like it is, nor should it. Alzheimer's does more than remove memories - it peels away a person, layer by layer, and it is devastating to watch. Not only will a loved one begin forgetting the most basic things, personalities change . A laid back, happy person can become extremely frustrated (understandable), irrational, and demanding. I know because I've witnessed this. I am not sure if it's because we have more avenues for communication, or if Alzheimer's and dementia are on the rise, but it seems to me I am hearing more and more about people being diagnosed.
That being said, early onset Alzheimer's is quite possibly the worst of the worst, robbing younger people of their futures, and sending family members into a tailspin.
Even so, this book is not all doom and gloom. It is also love, hope, resilience, bravery, and faith. It is a must read.
February 2, 2019
In 2009, Sarah Smith and her family drove from Dallas to Houston to visit her parents over Thanksgiving. She offered to do some early Christmas-present wrapping with her mother, and noticed that her mum was having trouble tying ribbons. The older woman kept making a fist and rubbing her forearm. She also reported she’d had numbness and tingling in her hand for some time. Sarah feared the worst: a brain tumour, perhaps. Unfortunately, her mother, then aged 64 and seemingly “fit as a fiddle”, was extremely stubborn and refused to see a doctor. Soon, she was having troubles with numbers, often subtracting a final zero from a figure. On one shopping trip with a friend, she racked up a $1500 bill for make-up. She had thought the total read $150. Fine motor skills also suffered. She couldn’t write her name. She also became increasingly restless and irritable. A diagnosis of Early-Onset Alzheimer’s Disease was made in 2012. The neurologist was certain that Sarah’s mother, called “Beauty” by her grandchildren, had actually had the disease for some years. In E.O.A.D., decline is swifter than Alzheimer’s that manifests later in life. Beauty would likely need to be taken into care in five to seven years.
Smith documents her father’s efforts at moving his wife from Houston to Dallas, where they could be close to Sarah and one of Sarah’s brothers. Family support would be critical in dealing with this challenging diagnosis. Once installed in her new, smaller home, however, Beauty became increasingly agitated. Sarah’s dad often took her out on neighbourhood walks, but no sooner were they back home than she’d be demanding to go on another, entirely forgetting she’d already been out. She dangerously moved heavy furniture up and down stairs on a regular basis, scratching floors and walls, and becoming irrationally angry if anyone tried to stop her. At times, she escaped from the house and become disoriented. One time, campus police at the local university had to bring her home on their cart. She knew neither her address nor her phone number, but the police reasoned she might recognize her house if they drove around a bit. She did.
One of the biggest problems at this time was that Beauty developed a sudden extreme craving for alcohol. Neither of Sarah’s parents, straight-and-narrow Christians that they were, had consumed alcohol in years, so this was quite the thing. (It occurs to me that Beauty was perhaps, in her own way, trying to calm her agitation. After all, alcohol is a depressant.) Sarah’s husband, Thad, had overcome alcoholism some years before. It was Sarah’s firm belief that God “completely [and “magically”—I might sardonically add] took away Thad’s desire for alcohol”. Sarah appeared to believe God might be prayerfully prevailed upon to do a repeat performance.
It was around this point in reading—the 20% mark—that I decided I could not finish Smith’s memoir, which is plainly intended for a Christian audience. (Unfortunately, the description on Net galley did not make this clear.) The ongoing references to “God’s abiding love”, “His daily miracles”, and so on just became too much for me. I also found the writing saccharine and cliché ridden at times. My personal reaction was to find a lot of the religiosity a form of denial. There are obviously many ways to be in the world. Smith’s religious faith clearly gives her comfort, but I cannot relate to it in the least, and found myself growing increasingly annoyed by the Christian references. Potential readers, even non-religious ones, may still find the book valuable if they are willing to look past the book’s evangelical slant.
I wish the author well. She has clearly had a trying and heartbreaking time of it.
Smith documents her father’s efforts at moving his wife from Houston to Dallas, where they could be close to Sarah and one of Sarah’s brothers. Family support would be critical in dealing with this challenging diagnosis. Once installed in her new, smaller home, however, Beauty became increasingly agitated. Sarah’s dad often took her out on neighbourhood walks, but no sooner were they back home than she’d be demanding to go on another, entirely forgetting she’d already been out. She dangerously moved heavy furniture up and down stairs on a regular basis, scratching floors and walls, and becoming irrationally angry if anyone tried to stop her. At times, she escaped from the house and become disoriented. One time, campus police at the local university had to bring her home on their cart. She knew neither her address nor her phone number, but the police reasoned she might recognize her house if they drove around a bit. She did.
One of the biggest problems at this time was that Beauty developed a sudden extreme craving for alcohol. Neither of Sarah’s parents, straight-and-narrow Christians that they were, had consumed alcohol in years, so this was quite the thing. (It occurs to me that Beauty was perhaps, in her own way, trying to calm her agitation. After all, alcohol is a depressant.) Sarah’s husband, Thad, had overcome alcoholism some years before. It was Sarah’s firm belief that God “completely [and “magically”—I might sardonically add] took away Thad’s desire for alcohol”. Sarah appeared to believe God might be prayerfully prevailed upon to do a repeat performance.
It was around this point in reading—the 20% mark—that I decided I could not finish Smith’s memoir, which is plainly intended for a Christian audience. (Unfortunately, the description on Net galley did not make this clear.) The ongoing references to “God’s abiding love”, “His daily miracles”, and so on just became too much for me. I also found the writing saccharine and cliché ridden at times. My personal reaction was to find a lot of the religiosity a form of denial. There are obviously many ways to be in the world. Smith’s religious faith clearly gives her comfort, but I cannot relate to it in the least, and found myself growing increasingly annoyed by the Christian references. Potential readers, even non-religious ones, may still find the book valuable if they are willing to look past the book’s evangelical slant.
I wish the author well. She has clearly had a trying and heartbreaking time of it.
March 5, 2019
I won this book through a Goodreads Giveaway and am happy to provide a review.
Unfortunately, I couldn't finish this novel. I thought the book would be interesting, given the subject matter (mother diagnosed with Early-onset Alzheimer's) and because just recently, I lost my great aunt partly due to dementia. I've known people who have had dementia and friends who have dealt with family members who had Alzheimer's, and figured this book might be an interesting read because of the recent events I've experienced. However, the more I read, the more I couldn't get past how many times God and God's plan is mentioned. Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against religion, but I felt like I couldn't go a chapter without it being mentioned. I felt like that was a really heavy focus on the book, and would have liked to see how Sarah's family dealt with what happened more. I got about 65% into the book before I called it quits. But I really felt for Sarah and her family. It's not easy watching someone go through this and feeling like they abandoned a family member in need. These things are hard for everyone.
I will update this review at a later date when I come back to the book and actually finish it to see if my review changed.
Unfortunately, I couldn't finish this novel. I thought the book would be interesting, given the subject matter (mother diagnosed with Early-onset Alzheimer's) and because just recently, I lost my great aunt partly due to dementia. I've known people who have had dementia and friends who have dealt with family members who had Alzheimer's, and figured this book might be an interesting read because of the recent events I've experienced. However, the more I read, the more I couldn't get past how many times God and God's plan is mentioned. Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against religion, but I felt like I couldn't go a chapter without it being mentioned. I felt like that was a really heavy focus on the book, and would have liked to see how Sarah's family dealt with what happened more. I got about 65% into the book before I called it quits. But I really felt for Sarah and her family. It's not easy watching someone go through this and feeling like they abandoned a family member in need. These things are hard for everyone.
I will update this review at a later date when I come back to the book and actually finish it to see if my review changed.
June 9, 2019
This one hit me close to home, as I lost my husband to a form of dementia, so I don't feel up to going into a lot of detail in my review tonight.
I will say this, Sarah shared the story of her family's journey with honesty and warmth. The book is written in a style that is a pleasure to read, and ends with a changed but loving family.
God is good.
I received this book free in exchange for an honest review on Goodreads.
I will say this, Sarah shared the story of her family's journey with honesty and warmth. The book is written in a style that is a pleasure to read, and ends with a changed but loving family.
God is good.
I received this book free in exchange for an honest review on Goodreads.
December 10, 2018
I was a full-time carer for my later mother, who suffered from the wicked disease 'Alzheimer's', so when i spotted this book on Netgalley, i felt that it was a book that i could relate to.
Just like Sarah's mother 'Beauty' my mother also had the onset of Alzheimer's too early in life (early 60's). There were so many parts of this book that i could relate to and could feel the pain and heartache that Sarah went through. It brought back my own memories and just like 'Beauty' it brought back the days my mother got herself lost when taking herself out. The difference with Sarah and her family and my own, is that we do not believe in God and the only help we turned to, was a private carer who came to the house a few hours a week so i could go shopping etc. It also helped that i was once a carer in a home for those with Alzheimer's and other forms of Dementia for several years. The care home that Sarah had placed her mother in sounded a wonderful home. I could never place my mother in a home for various reasons.
I do highly recommend this book to anyone who is interested in what life is like from the early stages of Alzheimer's as well as anyone who is caring or has cared for a loved one with Alzheimer's.
My thanks to Netgalley, Sarah and the Publishers for my advanced copy of 'Broken Beauty'. This is my honest review, which i have freely given.
Just like Sarah's mother 'Beauty' my mother also had the onset of Alzheimer's too early in life (early 60's). There were so many parts of this book that i could relate to and could feel the pain and heartache that Sarah went through. It brought back my own memories and just like 'Beauty' it brought back the days my mother got herself lost when taking herself out. The difference with Sarah and her family and my own, is that we do not believe in God and the only help we turned to, was a private carer who came to the house a few hours a week so i could go shopping etc. It also helped that i was once a carer in a home for those with Alzheimer's and other forms of Dementia for several years. The care home that Sarah had placed her mother in sounded a wonderful home. I could never place my mother in a home for various reasons.
I do highly recommend this book to anyone who is interested in what life is like from the early stages of Alzheimer's as well as anyone who is caring or has cared for a loved one with Alzheimer's.
My thanks to Netgalley, Sarah and the Publishers for my advanced copy of 'Broken Beauty'. This is my honest review, which i have freely given.
May 17, 2019
“God allows the things He hates to accomplish what He loves.” -Joni Earekson Tada
This book is a story of how this statement is fleshed out as your journey along with the diagnosis and struggle to care for a parent with early onset Alzheimer’s. I appreciate the detailed reflections and thoughts to some of the difficult conversations and realizations that Sarah documented about her mother, Beauty. This book is written from a unique perspective—the adult child of an Alzheimer’s patient with a young family. Highly recommend to anyone in this situation or if you know a friend you would love to support walking this journey.
This book is a story of how this statement is fleshed out as your journey along with the diagnosis and struggle to care for a parent with early onset Alzheimer’s. I appreciate the detailed reflections and thoughts to some of the difficult conversations and realizations that Sarah documented about her mother, Beauty. This book is written from a unique perspective—the adult child of an Alzheimer’s patient with a young family. Highly recommend to anyone in this situation or if you know a friend you would love to support walking this journey.
March 14, 2019
I received this book from Goodreads for an honest review. I must say I am conflicted, both professionally and personally. The author is from an upper SES, and a devout Christian. Yet, as such the book is less about Alzheimer's, her mother's deterioration and coping methodology and more about appearances, the benefits of having financial resources, and 'God's Plan'. Many reviews presented here on Goodreads are resonances of reviewers' personal experiences with Alzheimer's . As such, I wanted to say to this author " Perhaps God's Plan was for you and your family to Have a plan.". Extant symptomatology was so evident, yet the family placed her (Beauty) at risk by waiting for God to make a plan!! Knowledge is power, and yet... it's as if knowledge was gained experientially rather than consultation with experts and associations, by research. . The diagnosis was hidden from the author by the parents. Then she didn't broach her father with her knowledge of Beauty's wanderings, the need for placement. EVEN at placement she is reluctant to tell the full extent of the symptoms! I personally became so angry when they found that she had swallowed nail polish remover, yet didn't call Poison Control Center, didn't take her to an ER when she had symptomatology , but relied on Beauty's statements that she was 'fine'. Acetone (in nail polish) can cause respiratory failure etc. Disturbing is the underlying theme of denial in the entire book. Denial does happen but oh my here it is not recognized as such even in retrospect! Disturbing too was the emphasis on 'appearances'... physical beauty. And, again, when selecting a placement for Beauty, it was an emphasis on appearance, "a feel" they had, not long term care, research on centers, data and fact driven knowledge for placement PLUS attending to Beauty's personality and emotions. Perhaps the saving characteristic of the book is that it emphasizes that disease, pain, hurt, Alzheimer's affects all, the rich and the poor.
January 2, 2021
For future readers, this book is meant for a Christian audience as well as those interested in reading about a Early-Onset Alzheimer's story. There is no mention in the synopsis of this book having a religious base. I did not look into information on the author when getting this through a Giveaway so I guess I learned I should do some research before selecting a book just based on the synopsis. I have read other books with religious tendencies in it, but this book was just too much for me. I would suggest it to anyone that is Christian and is interested in an Alzheimer's story.
March 22, 2019
I received a free copy of this book through a Goodreads giveaway, and was not disappointed. While the subject matter of Alzheimer's is not always pretty or easy, the author did not shy away from the brutal truths or the beautiful hope of the situation.
January 31, 2021
This book was loaned to me by my sister-in-law who recently had to place my brother in a care facility because of dementia related to Parkinson’s and MSA. It was wrenching to read because so much of it is lived experience, although I have not been a caregiver for my brother since they live far away.
I skimmed over much of the book because it is heavily Christian, almost evangelical. Although I am a Christian, that part of the book didn’t speak to me.
The author and her family are people of privilege (vacations at a house in Cabo with an infinity pool, chef and house caretaker.) I think their means may give them a little different experience of resources than most. However the messages at the heart of the book about the power of love and making the most of each moment are important for all of us.
I skimmed over much of the book because it is heavily Christian, almost evangelical. Although I am a Christian, that part of the book didn’t speak to me.
The author and her family are people of privilege (vacations at a house in Cabo with an infinity pool, chef and house caretaker.) I think their means may give them a little different experience of resources than most. However the messages at the heart of the book about the power of love and making the most of each moment are important for all of us.
February 25, 2019
Broken Beauty
This book was an okay read, not really the type of books I read. I won this ebook through Goodreads.
This book was an okay read, not really the type of books I read. I won this ebook through Goodreads.
February 15, 2019
Alzheimer’s is a terrible disease. Understatement. The Bible says that it is a result of man’s fall from paradise, man’s fall away from God. So it is also a sign that everything is not right with our world, something has gone terribly wrong. I say that because disease, suffering, doesn’t just bring physical and emotional pain, but also spiritual pain. It lets us in on the open secret that there is a curse on this world. And it makes us feel our partial separation from the goodness and beauty of God.
Suffering brings loneliness.
“My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”
The good news is loneliness and suffering don’t have to have the last word.
Clearly the author sees that. And I appreciate her sharing her faith and her journey. It’s helpful to be able to learn from others’ experiences and to experience their lives if only for a moment.
I want to point out one or two areas where I may disagree with the author.
I do have a different perspective, I think, about grief and suffering. Modern Evangelicalism, in many ways, seems to be allergic to suffering, lament, and to grief. Practically, this can mean quickly passing through pain, ignoring difficult issues, or clinging to passages of scripture without understanding the larger meaning and context of those passages. Many can look at pain/grief as something to overcome and achieve victory over. But I think Jesus and the apostles point to a different way. I think we learn to trust that the Lord will carry us through the pain and grief, that He will walk with us, but I don’t think the goal is to achieve victory. It’s not so much a battle to win, as much as it is a pilgrimage.
A pilgrimage with the LORD through grief and pain. The joy of the LORD is our strength in the middle of our grief and pain. It doesn’t blot the suffering out, but it gives us the strength to endure and live for Him. We can have sorrow and we can have joy.
I guess the other thing I noticed was just how individualistic her story is. And I think this is a reflection of American Evangelicalism. What I mean by individualistic is that how she uses scripture is very Evangelical and Evangelicalism has been burdened by a kind of American western individualism since its inception. Evangelicals tend to see scripture almost exclusively as something that is meant to be applied to their individual lives. But American Evangelicals need to understand that scripture must be applied not just to individuals’ lives, but also groups and society. (I’m not saying her use of scripture is always wrong, but sometimes the way she uses it I think reveals this emphasis of individualism common to Evangelicals, to the neglect of other and as equally necessary applications; and this can sometimes distort the scriptural meanings as well).
Anyway, I want to end on an appreciative note :) I appreciate this book, and I appreciate the author sharing her story. It breaks my heart that individuals and families have to live with diseases like Alzheimer’s. I hope that as the author continues her pilgrimage she will continue to experience God’s love for her and her family.
Suffering brings loneliness.
“My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”
The good news is loneliness and suffering don’t have to have the last word.
Clearly the author sees that. And I appreciate her sharing her faith and her journey. It’s helpful to be able to learn from others’ experiences and to experience their lives if only for a moment.
I want to point out one or two areas where I may disagree with the author.
I do have a different perspective, I think, about grief and suffering. Modern Evangelicalism, in many ways, seems to be allergic to suffering, lament, and to grief. Practically, this can mean quickly passing through pain, ignoring difficult issues, or clinging to passages of scripture without understanding the larger meaning and context of those passages. Many can look at pain/grief as something to overcome and achieve victory over. But I think Jesus and the apostles point to a different way. I think we learn to trust that the Lord will carry us through the pain and grief, that He will walk with us, but I don’t think the goal is to achieve victory. It’s not so much a battle to win, as much as it is a pilgrimage.
A pilgrimage with the LORD through grief and pain. The joy of the LORD is our strength in the middle of our grief and pain. It doesn’t blot the suffering out, but it gives us the strength to endure and live for Him. We can have sorrow and we can have joy.
I guess the other thing I noticed was just how individualistic her story is. And I think this is a reflection of American Evangelicalism. What I mean by individualistic is that how she uses scripture is very Evangelical and Evangelicalism has been burdened by a kind of American western individualism since its inception. Evangelicals tend to see scripture almost exclusively as something that is meant to be applied to their individual lives. But American Evangelicals need to understand that scripture must be applied not just to individuals’ lives, but also groups and society. (I’m not saying her use of scripture is always wrong, but sometimes the way she uses it I think reveals this emphasis of individualism common to Evangelicals, to the neglect of other and as equally necessary applications; and this can sometimes distort the scriptural meanings as well).
Anyway, I want to end on an appreciative note :) I appreciate this book, and I appreciate the author sharing her story. It breaks my heart that individuals and families have to live with diseases like Alzheimer’s. I hope that as the author continues her pilgrimage she will continue to experience God’s love for her and her family.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
May 18, 2020
This book was such a beautiful story! Sarah Smith is not a best-selling author. She is just an ordinary person who is willing to share the journey of her mother’s battle with early-onset Alzheimer’s disease. Hers is the story of love, respect, courage, and self-sacrifice.
I found this book after following Sarah’s Instagram account. I so admired the way she loved her mom (known as Beauty) and, having walked a similar path with both of my parents (one who died of cancer and the other of ALS), I could completely relate to the feelings and emotions that are wrapped up in the world of being a caretaker. Sarah’s love for her mother shines in everything she does. Her life of service is an inspiration to anyone who knows her, and it is a testimony to the way she allows God to use her to bless others, despite unbelievably difficult circumstances. I loved this book and would recommend it to anyone who is walking through an illness or is in a caretaker role. I promise it will encourage you and bless your life! 💜
I found this book after following Sarah’s Instagram account. I so admired the way she loved her mom (known as Beauty) and, having walked a similar path with both of my parents (one who died of cancer and the other of ALS), I could completely relate to the feelings and emotions that are wrapped up in the world of being a caretaker. Sarah’s love for her mother shines in everything she does. Her life of service is an inspiration to anyone who knows her, and it is a testimony to the way she allows God to use her to bless others, despite unbelievably difficult circumstances. I loved this book and would recommend it to anyone who is walking through an illness or is in a caretaker role. I promise it will encourage you and bless your life! 💜
April 30, 2022
My mom wanted me to read this book for several reasons. One is so that I knew what my mom's mom went through and what my mom might be going through later in life. Broken beauty is a daughter's point of view of the decline of the brain going to early-onset Alzheimer's. I will admit I cried several times. Mainly because I finally understood what my mom went through losing my grandmother. She was a caregiver to someone with Alzheimer's. It can be taxing, overwhelming, and so many different things. Having God with you makes all the difference. I encourage you all to read this book! Thank you, mom, for suggesting this book! Sorry, it took so long to read it. I took yesterday evening, April 29, and most of today, April 30, to finish where I left off. I am catching up on my reading, and it feels nice.
January 7, 2020
Thank you for putting into words my feelings...
Having went through the pain of trying to care for my own mom for a few month, I too had to be the one to admit her to a nursing home without her knowledge and slip away. Sarah's story broke my heart as I shared so many of the same occurrences with her. I feel like God sent this book especially for me to read as I too suffer from the feelings of failure as her dad did because I was unable to handle the stress and demands that caring for someone with dementia requires. It was a true blessing to let go and allow others to care for my mama, and to become her daughter again. To be able to share love and joy and laughter, instead of hurt exhaustion and anger. Thank you Sarah you book was a true blessing to me.
Having went through the pain of trying to care for my own mom for a few month, I too had to be the one to admit her to a nursing home without her knowledge and slip away. Sarah's story broke my heart as I shared so many of the same occurrences with her. I feel like God sent this book especially for me to read as I too suffer from the feelings of failure as her dad did because I was unable to handle the stress and demands that caring for someone with dementia requires. It was a true blessing to let go and allow others to care for my mama, and to become her daughter again. To be able to share love and joy and laughter, instead of hurt exhaustion and anger. Thank you Sarah you book was a true blessing to me.
April 22, 2019
My three positives and a negative, because the world needs more positivity:
+ With so many affected by Alzheimer's this book is needed. Reports from the National Institute on Aging indicate that someone in the U.S. develops Alzheimer’s disease every 66 seconds. My own mother suffered from the disease. It was heartbreaking to witness. Through most of my life, she was an amazing mother, a caring wife, a capable nurse, and a voracious reader. Then, that person slipped away. In the last year of her life, she could barely form a coherent sentence. It was both heartening and heartbreaking to read this story
+ The author, Sarah Smith, shares the good, bad and ugly of her family's trek. She speaks honestly about how difficult it is to love someone with this atrocious disease. She talks of distressing changes in behaviour, the frightening accidents, and the disheartening loss of skills. But, throughout, she reminds the reader of the beauty of small moments On my knees, I looked up at her. She looked back into my eyes. “Mom, I love you. You know that, don’t you?” “Yes, Daughter. I know.” She smiled softly and continued to stare into my eyes with complete trust, believing that I would take care of her and help her get through this journey.
+ Though it was an impossible decision, recounting the thoughts, feelings, and process of how her mother was put into a memory care facility surely will help others facing a similar dilemma. I tried and failed to move my own mother to a home. She would agree then refuse. It was her greatest fear. Yet, despite this, I still believe it would have been better for her. I hope reading this story will give other families wrestling with this choice strength and courage. Caretakers need a break. Though Dad has accepted this as God’s plan all along, it has been devastating beyond words for him. He used to think “through sickness and in health” meant that he should only take care of her from home, and that placing her outside the home meant he was a failure. But those were lies he believed. The reality is that having her at home nearly killed him, though it broke every part of his heart once she was placed. As one of Sarah's friends pronounced in the book “Sarah, I’m sorry,” Little Ginny said, “but I can’t listen to the word ‘abandon’ anymore. You are not deserting your mother. You are loving her by giving her a better quality of life.”
- While I believe in a higher power, I am not overly religious. There is a lot of God in this book. I am all for love. And, I understand some find strength in their beliefs. For the author and her family, clearly that is the case. Still, it is a lot.
Read this if you or someone you know has been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s or another dementia. As the author states Mom is a human being with a name, and although this disease is a mystery and I want it to be cured, her life and my relationship with her are important, significant, and worthy of attention.
+ With so many affected by Alzheimer's this book is needed. Reports from the National Institute on Aging indicate that someone in the U.S. develops Alzheimer’s disease every 66 seconds. My own mother suffered from the disease. It was heartbreaking to witness. Through most of my life, she was an amazing mother, a caring wife, a capable nurse, and a voracious reader. Then, that person slipped away. In the last year of her life, she could barely form a coherent sentence. It was both heartening and heartbreaking to read this story
+ The author, Sarah Smith, shares the good, bad and ugly of her family's trek. She speaks honestly about how difficult it is to love someone with this atrocious disease. She talks of distressing changes in behaviour, the frightening accidents, and the disheartening loss of skills. But, throughout, she reminds the reader of the beauty of small moments On my knees, I looked up at her. She looked back into my eyes. “Mom, I love you. You know that, don’t you?” “Yes, Daughter. I know.” She smiled softly and continued to stare into my eyes with complete trust, believing that I would take care of her and help her get through this journey.
+ Though it was an impossible decision, recounting the thoughts, feelings, and process of how her mother was put into a memory care facility surely will help others facing a similar dilemma. I tried and failed to move my own mother to a home. She would agree then refuse. It was her greatest fear. Yet, despite this, I still believe it would have been better for her. I hope reading this story will give other families wrestling with this choice strength and courage. Caretakers need a break. Though Dad has accepted this as God’s plan all along, it has been devastating beyond words for him. He used to think “through sickness and in health” meant that he should only take care of her from home, and that placing her outside the home meant he was a failure. But those were lies he believed. The reality is that having her at home nearly killed him, though it broke every part of his heart once she was placed. As one of Sarah's friends pronounced in the book “Sarah, I’m sorry,” Little Ginny said, “but I can’t listen to the word ‘abandon’ anymore. You are not deserting your mother. You are loving her by giving her a better quality of life.”
- While I believe in a higher power, I am not overly religious. There is a lot of God in this book. I am all for love. And, I understand some find strength in their beliefs. For the author and her family, clearly that is the case. Still, it is a lot.
Read this if you or someone you know has been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s or another dementia. As the author states Mom is a human being with a name, and although this disease is a mystery and I want it to be cured, her life and my relationship with her are important, significant, and worthy of attention.
March 24, 2019
Having just gone through this with my mother (she passed away in Feb 2019 after a ten-year journey, not EOAD but starting at age 67), I appreciate the author’s frank descriptions of the discovery of her mother’s situation, shock by shock. It is good to have in writing for those coming into this.
This book will let you see the scariness of going to a neurologist to get a diagnosis (from the standpoint of the patient as well as the family), the situations which present themselves as the patient transitions to needing 24-hour care, and the conflicting thoughts about getting professional help once the family is exhausted. The author also generously mixes in the joys which pop up along the way, and spotlights how well children often grasp the situation and can find a positive way to bring joy to the patient. Beauty’s transition to the memory care unit was certainly unique, but reading the book will give one insight on how to attempt to make the move. It isn’t easy. Family does feel as if they are committing a breach of trust. But once it is done, the family gradually can breathe and go on with life all the while still including their loved one in many activities, both on and off campus. Yes, the patient does come to see the memory care unit (if staffed by loving people) as a safe place to return to. It is a miracle.
I really appreciate the Bearden family sharing their story. I hope that many lives will be better as this book is read and shared. It has information for the families, the friends, and caregivers of all Alzheimer’s Disease patients.
I’d like to add that the daughter knew her mother well enough to tell us a little of what was going through her mind as the disease progressed. That insight is priceless!
This book will let you see the scariness of going to a neurologist to get a diagnosis (from the standpoint of the patient as well as the family), the situations which present themselves as the patient transitions to needing 24-hour care, and the conflicting thoughts about getting professional help once the family is exhausted. The author also generously mixes in the joys which pop up along the way, and spotlights how well children often grasp the situation and can find a positive way to bring joy to the patient. Beauty’s transition to the memory care unit was certainly unique, but reading the book will give one insight on how to attempt to make the move. It isn’t easy. Family does feel as if they are committing a breach of trust. But once it is done, the family gradually can breathe and go on with life all the while still including their loved one in many activities, both on and off campus. Yes, the patient does come to see the memory care unit (if staffed by loving people) as a safe place to return to. It is a miracle.
I really appreciate the Bearden family sharing their story. I hope that many lives will be better as this book is read and shared. It has information for the families, the friends, and caregivers of all Alzheimer’s Disease patients.
I’d like to add that the daughter knew her mother well enough to tell us a little of what was going through her mind as the disease progressed. That insight is priceless!
March 11, 2019
3.5 stars. Sarah's mother, called Beauty by her grandchildren, is diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's disease. Sarah and Beauty's friends had been noticing her motor skills were off and her affinity for numbers was awry. This book recreates the journey over several years of the progression of Beauty's illness and how it affected the family as they eventually had to place her in memory care.
About half the book is filled with religious references as this is how the family dealt with the stresses that the disease brings. Beauty's symptoms and reactions are very similar to those of my mother-in-law. They both live in their own little reality and become very argumentative. This book gives a very realistic look at the challenges of the disease. I received a Kindle copy from a Goodreads giveaway.
About half the book is filled with religious references as this is how the family dealt with the stresses that the disease brings. Beauty's symptoms and reactions are very similar to those of my mother-in-law. They both live in their own little reality and become very argumentative. This book gives a very realistic look at the challenges of the disease. I received a Kindle copy from a Goodreads giveaway.
March 2, 2019
My mother has Alzheimer's , though not early onset, and I have been dealing with everything that involved for several years. It is a life shattering experience and one I wouldn't wish on anyone. Although Sarah had her father to make final decisions, I had no one and sometimes the rest of the family disagreed with what I considered best, so along with all the emotions and stress of handling things and getting my mom placed, I was also dealing with them. It brought back many memories of making that decision when I read about them in the book. While not a "feel good" book with a happy ending, it is worth reading so you will understand what someone you know, or possibly yourself, will go through someday. I won a Kindle copy of this book here on Goodreads.
December 30, 2019
The book was more about religion than dealing with alzheimers to me, which probably should be more clear somewhere. There are many who look for books like that and it should be easier for them to find. Those who enjoy that may find it inspiring, and it was interesting to read. It flowed fairly well but I wish there was a bit more about how the rest of the family dealt with things. It was especially interesting because Beauty's alzheimers seemed very different from other books I've read. The only thing I couldn't get past was thinking pain or tingling in her arm was a brain tumor. The only way that makes sense at all is if the author knew someone that had one. Otherwise why would you jump straight to that? I did get this book for free from goodreads.
February 16, 2019
This book was brutally difficult to read because I could relate to every story that was shared in some way since my mother had a similar journey with behavioral variant Frontal Temporal Dementia. While reading the story of her mother's journey, it brought back memories of my mom's journey and both good and difficult memories our our time together, as well as the never ending to-do list of a care-giver and the constant exhaustion. Couldn't wait to finish the book only because it brought back vivid memories and thoughts of my times with my own mother and how I wish I could go to her memory care right now for another visit.
March 25, 2019
I won this book in a Goodreads giveaway. For over three years I was caregiver to both of my parents. My mother suffered from Alzheimer's so seeing the subject of this book I was interested in the book. Being a caregiver for your own family member is such a heartbreaking thing to do, watching the parent you knew disappear before your very eyes and becoming someone that you don't recognize. The author of the book did a very good job of bringing to life the pain and heartache this disease brings to a family. I believe that the book depicts a pretty fair outlook of what the future holds in store when a loved one suffers from this disease.
June 29, 2019
I won a Kindle copy of this book from Goodreads. I found it well written and informative. Many readers found the religious references disturbing; I personally liked the fact that Sarah could be so open about her belief in God, and how she found solace in the midst of such a difficult trial. I think it would be important to have a place to turn for help and comfort, and appreciate that she could share her ways of coping and the fact that she felt helped and guided. Alzheimer's is a truly horrible disease for every family member, and I feel this is a valuable look at one family's experiences.
January 25, 2019
While this is not an easy book to read, it is a very important book to read. It puts names and faces and lives on to the tragedy of Alzheimer’s. Not being overly religious, I was a little put off by the sheer number of Bible references in the book. As I progressed through the story, I came to realize that not only were they important, they were integral to it. By the end, I didn’t enen notice them. This is one book that I will read again and again. I know that will grieve with Sarah when Beauty leaves us . Her mom became mine and I am honored she shared Beauty with me.
March 4, 2019
Here's what she said to me...
This story is amazing. The love of the Lord and family can be felt in each word. This book would be wonderful for anyone ever dealing Alzheimer's. I mean both family and friends as well as those that treat and care for them. If ever I felt you could place yourself in the shoes of someone with Alzheimer's, this story does that. These people are real and the Lord leads them in every step. Blessed to have read it
This story is amazing. The love of the Lord and family can be felt in each word. This book would be wonderful for anyone ever dealing Alzheimer's. I mean both family and friends as well as those that treat and care for them. If ever I felt you could place yourself in the shoes of someone with Alzheimer's, this story does that. These people are real and the Lord leads them in every step. Blessed to have read it
March 20, 2019
Like others, I would have liked it mentioned that this book is written from a particular religious viewpoint. Not being religious, I too found I had to skip paragraphs that had no meaning for me. I did, however, finish reading and on the whole, am pleased that I had the opportunity to read it. It is very well written and engaging (I'm sure more so if you subscribe to the author's brand of Christianity).
April 4, 2019
I won this book from good reads Kindle. Thank you for allowing to read this great book for free. I loved the story, the characters and the setting. I noticed that a lot of reviews didn't like the religious parts of the book, but they were really integral parts of the book and shouldn't have been left out. The family did their best for their mother-wife by placing her in a care center where she could receive the best care for her own safety and did not abandon her. They did everything possible to make her comfortable by filling her room with her things so it would look like home.
Altzimers is a very sad disease for the patient and the caregivers.
Altzimers is a very sad disease for the patient and the caregivers.
February 27, 2019
I won a Kindle copy of this from Goodreads. And I am so glad I did. This is the story of the author as she dealt with the news and then caring for her mother with early onset Alzheimer’s disease. She tells of the devastation and destruction this disease causes in families, and I can relate to some of this as my mother also has Alzheimer’s. But the author doesn’t stop with the bad, but also shows that there can be beauty found among the ashes, and that is what I needed to hear.
March 7, 2019
This is daughter's story of how she and her family coped with their mothers early onset alzheimer"s disease. It is a beautiful touching story full of love and learning to accept what can't be changed. They are a strong Christian family and their faith is shown as their light and rock. It is the story of her going forward from the what if's, and living and loving in the what is.
March 20, 2019
A great book for anyone that has a friend or loved one affected by Alzheimer's disease. I know firsthand, my father died from it. This is a sad but also uplifting story of how this family used their great faith in God to make it through. I received this gook for free from the Goodreads first-read giveaway.
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