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Gross Anatomy
“I cannot tell you the number of times I’ve wondered, especially after a spicy meal, why evolution wasn’t smart enough to build us with buttholes made out of something more durable? Titanium, perhaps?”
From the hilarious Mara Altman, Gross Anatomy unapologetically explores the beautiful, and sometimes not so beautiful, aspects of our bodies, and why they’re worth loving anyway. From hairy chins to braless outings, lice-infestations to PMS, no body part is left undiscussed as Altman takes the reader on a wild journey from head to toe, recounting experiences most of us are too polite to share.
Hugely funny and unashamedly body-positive, this book is a must-read for all women (and men, too). Through a combination of personal anecdotes and fascinating research, Mara Altman proves herself as a fearless and thoroughly charming writer, creating one of the most compulsive feminist reads of the year.
321 pages, Kindle Edition
First published August 21, 2018
211 people are currently reading
5256 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 330 reviews
September 11, 2018
There ought to be a genre -Mary Roach type. This book, Gross Anatomy attempts to out-Roach the genre's originator, pop science with humour and personal stories but does not succeed. I suffered through the over-long first chapter of Mara trying to get her excess body hair removed and eyebrows plucked. Although I don't have any hair on my legs or face, my mother had issues and went through much of what Mara describes so I could identify. But it was too much detail and too much, 'lucky I can laugh at myself, oh gorilla me!' It wasn't bad, it just wasn't my style. And that sums up the whole reading experience of the book for me. YMMV
But when she went completely over the top, like tummy buttons and weeing, I didn't laugh (so there goes the humour) and didn't learn anything of value (no important science).
"In fact, your belly button, as you read this, is attached to your bladder via a defunct structure called the urachus. “When I open up the abdominal wall of a cadaver,” Harmon explained, “it looks like four to six hairs of pasta are coming out of the back of the belly button.”
Our navels are only the tip of an underground weblike iceberg. And guess who’s not going to eat spaghetti this month? Me!
In extremely rare cases, these abandoned ligament structures don’t seal up after birth. If that happens, a condition may occur where you can pee through your belly button. Can you imagine the convenience (and the adorable tiny urinals)? Unfortunately, this is not something that you can learn to do on your own. Doctors actually consider the ability to pee through your belly button a problem."
Then there was the justification for why we do things to make ourselves look nice. I don't agree with it. This is not an existential issue but more like one of sexual attraction as young people definitely seem to make most effort until some of them get married, have babies and an effort is made only when there are people, like at a school reunion or family wedding, who would be severely critical if they didn't make an effort.
"[Goldenberg] explained that those parts of us that are animal-like—snotty snouts, pus-filled boils, milk-laden mammaries—are reminders, often subconscious, that just like other animals, we have an expiration date.
“So we invest a lot of effort in our bodies and try to transform them from their natural animal-like ways,” she said, noting practices such as wearing makeup, clothes, tattoos, and perfumes and even engaging in practices as simple as brushing one’s hair. “It’s a defense against the anxiety associated with the awareness of mortality.”
Tell that to the slobs who prop up the bar every night in the marina.
_____________
Note when reading the book:
But when she went completely over the top, like tummy buttons and weeing, I didn't laugh (so there goes the humour) and didn't learn anything of value (no important science).
"In fact, your belly button, as you read this, is attached to your bladder via a defunct structure called the urachus. “When I open up the abdominal wall of a cadaver,” Harmon explained, “it looks like four to six hairs of pasta are coming out of the back of the belly button.”
Our navels are only the tip of an underground weblike iceberg. And guess who’s not going to eat spaghetti this month? Me!
In extremely rare cases, these abandoned ligament structures don’t seal up after birth. If that happens, a condition may occur where you can pee through your belly button. Can you imagine the convenience (and the adorable tiny urinals)? Unfortunately, this is not something that you can learn to do on your own. Doctors actually consider the ability to pee through your belly button a problem."
Then there was the justification for why we do things to make ourselves look nice. I don't agree with it. This is not an existential issue but more like one of sexual attraction as young people definitely seem to make most effort until some of them get married, have babies and an effort is made only when there are people, like at a school reunion or family wedding, who would be severely critical if they didn't make an effort.
"[Goldenberg] explained that those parts of us that are animal-like—snotty snouts, pus-filled boils, milk-laden mammaries—are reminders, often subconscious, that just like other animals, we have an expiration date.
“So we invest a lot of effort in our bodies and try to transform them from their natural animal-like ways,” she said, noting practices such as wearing makeup, clothes, tattoos, and perfumes and even engaging in practices as simple as brushing one’s hair. “It’s a defense against the anxiety associated with the awareness of mortality.”
Tell that to the slobs who prop up the bar every night in the marina.
_____________
Note when reading the book:
October 1, 2018
(4.5) The female body has been a source of deep embarrassment for Altman, but here she swaps shame for self-deprecating silliness and cringing for chuckling. Through a snappy blend of personal anecdotes and intensive research, she exposes the cultural expectations that make us dislike our bodies, suggesting that a better knowledge of anatomy might help us feel normal. While 11 of her 15 topics aren’t exclusive to the female anatomy—birthmarks, hemorrhoids, warts and more apply to men, too—she always presents an honest account of the female experience. (If she were 10–20 years older varicose veins and wrinkles might replace other chapters.) True to her comedy background, she comes out with terrific one-liners, like arriving sweaty to a party and finding people “gazed at me with the same mix of concern and disconcertment I’d expect if they’d just caught me fornicating with an antelope.”
This is one of my favorite books of the year and one I’d recommend to women of any age. It’s funny, it’s feminist, and it’s a cracking good read.
See my full review (complete with embarrassing personal revelations!) on the Glamour website.
This is one of my favorite books of the year and one I’d recommend to women of any age. It’s funny, it’s feminist, and it’s a cracking good read.
See my full review (complete with embarrassing personal revelations!) on the Glamour website.
July 4, 2022
Re-rating in July, 2022: Bumped this up a star after re-reading a couple of sections. My complaints below are still valid, but a lot of her jokes really are pretty funny.
========================
Two stars does not mean this book is terrible, only that I enjoyed it less than expected. I rate books compared to my expectations rather than in relation to other books.
Altman is a journalist by training and a comedian by inclination, and while she does both quite well, the marriage in this book is an uneasy one. I really did laugh out loud a few times while reading this, which few writers are able to make me do. Here, she describes a lice infestion:
Another point: she begins this whole endeavor with direct testimony from her husband that everything's fine, and a general acknowledgement that this is a marketing rather than a medical issue. For any women reading this who are worried about it, let me take you gently by the hand, look you in the eye, and promise you that anybody in the position of being able to smell your vagina is almost always going to be very happy to be there. Scout's honor.
The same is true of many of the other lengthy tours we go on -- facial hair, pubic hair, 'camel toe' (until reading this book, I was fully unaware that this was considered horrific and disgusting), belly button lint etc. In most cases, she begins the chapter with assurances that her boyfriend/husband/family was A-okay with the 'problem,' but was then told by her waxer/trainer/magazine article that this was a red-zone emergency. It seems self-sabotaging, to me.
I confess that I gave up on this book before I got to the chapter on anuses. I guess I feel I can live out the rest of my days without knowing.
I guess you could argue this is empowering because, for the most part, the conclusion is that these 'problems' are not really problems at all. In which case, the journalistic part of the book is just fine. As comedy, this went on way too long and was ultimately too encyclopedic.
========================
Two stars does not mean this book is terrible, only that I enjoyed it less than expected. I rate books compared to my expectations rather than in relation to other books.
Altman is a journalist by training and a comedian by inclination, and while she does both quite well, the marriage in this book is an uneasy one. I really did laugh out loud a few times while reading this, which few writers are able to make me do. Here, she describes a lice infestion:
I was reminded of lice-check days in kindergarten. The nurse came in with latex gloves...she laid those virtuosic hands onto my head. My eyes rolled back and my arms got gooseflesh as she parted my hair into tiny chunks and looked through each nook and cranny of my scalp. Lice check, I thought, should last forever. Parasite detection felt so good.And here she takes on what author Tim Winton has memorably described as "hammy crotchpong":
From that day forward, I got excited whenever a nurse appeared with latex gloves (an impulse that would eventually fail me.)
I couldn't even sit safely on the toilet anymore. Three weeks into her tenure at our apartment, [our puppy] charged into the bathroom when I was at my most vulnerable and locked her jaws onto the crotch portion of my underwear. She dug her front paws into the bath mat as she tried her hardest to pull my underwear free from my ankles. I tried to shake her loose, but only so much movement is advised in that situation.But herein lies the problem. It's fine to make a couple of jokes about (alleged) crotch stink. But then her journalistic instincts take over, and we're led on a very long tour through interviews with microbiologists, OB/GYNs, psychologists specializing in our responses to odors, people who write puff pieces for Allure magazine about douche, etc etc etc. Since there isn't actually anything wrong here, having nine or ten experts telling her she's barking up the wrong tree actually gets pretty boring.
Another point: she begins this whole endeavor with direct testimony from her husband that everything's fine, and a general acknowledgement that this is a marketing rather than a medical issue. For any women reading this who are worried about it, let me take you gently by the hand, look you in the eye, and promise you that anybody in the position of being able to smell your vagina is almost always going to be very happy to be there. Scout's honor.
The same is true of many of the other lengthy tours we go on -- facial hair, pubic hair, 'camel toe' (until reading this book, I was fully unaware that this was considered horrific and disgusting), belly button lint etc. In most cases, she begins the chapter with assurances that her boyfriend/husband/family was A-okay with the 'problem,' but was then told by her waxer/trainer/magazine article that this was a red-zone emergency. It seems self-sabotaging, to me.
I confess that I gave up on this book before I got to the chapter on anuses. I guess I feel I can live out the rest of my days without knowing.
I guess you could argue this is empowering because, for the most part, the conclusion is that these 'problems' are not really problems at all. In which case, the journalistic part of the book is just fine. As comedy, this went on way too long and was ultimately too encyclopedic.
Read
November 20, 2018It was fun for a bit, but I got tired of of the hair jokes it went on too long for me. Sad, too because I really enjoyed her humor, but she burned me out. I just wasn't interested in picking it up anymore.
April 21, 2020
Altman divulges the weird shit we deal with as women in a hilarious and informative manner. From body hair to tush functions to camouflaging the “toe,” she boldly discusses personal experiences and reservations while also conducting valid research. Think of a less boring Mary Roach (sorry; I like your books but they’re dry as hell) with an blunt and dark sense of humor. I actually snorted, you guys. Loved every second. Anytime I can laugh my ass off while also learning something? Well, that’s brilliant.
July 21, 2018
! So witty and comically right! Women feel as if they have to give up something to be accepted! She discussed things about the female body that women are ashamed to talk about usually.
March 1, 2019
This was one of those reads where it started to feel like work after a while - it wasn't that I wasn't enjoying it, it was just a lot. Like a /lot/, a lot.
Overall I liked Mara Altman's candor, willingness to talk openly about her body and all its comings and goings in the way that a lot of us do with our friends but still couldn't do in a public setting. It took a lot of fortitude to openly discuss your hemorrhoids, young lady, and for that I commend you. I used to work for Planned Parenthood and consider myself pretty damn knowledgeable about anatomy but even I learned things I didn't know (we have two sphincters! two!).
My only issue with this book is that Altman will sometimes veer from inconsiderate to downright narcissistic at points. I mean, she's a writer, so that's to be expected, but as someone who has suffered from PCOS since I was 19, the idea of her wishing she had it so she could blame her chin hair on something kind of rubbed me the wrong way. There are times when I found myself getting defensive of some of the women she spoke to in her different social experiments because there was an air - unintentional, I suspect - of judgment. Sometimes she catches herself in this, but sometimes she didn't.
That said, I will likely read her work again, and I do recommend this book.
Overall I liked Mara Altman's candor, willingness to talk openly about her body and all its comings and goings in the way that a lot of us do with our friends but still couldn't do in a public setting. It took a lot of fortitude to openly discuss your hemorrhoids, young lady, and for that I commend you. I used to work for Planned Parenthood and consider myself pretty damn knowledgeable about anatomy but even I learned things I didn't know (we have two sphincters! two!).
My only issue with this book is that Altman will sometimes veer from inconsiderate to downright narcissistic at points. I mean, she's a writer, so that's to be expected, but as someone who has suffered from PCOS since I was 19, the idea of her wishing she had it so she could blame her chin hair on something kind of rubbed me the wrong way. There are times when I found myself getting defensive of some of the women she spoke to in her different social experiments because there was an air - unintentional, I suspect - of judgment. Sometimes she catches herself in this, but sometimes she didn't.
That said, I will likely read her work again, and I do recommend this book.
March 22, 2022
To be a complete woman, I felt as though I had to get rid of a part of myself. But why? Why does there have to be all this shame and angst about something that's a natural part of being woman? The pressure to be hairless has driven me to feel like I have to hide something from my fiance, to spend thousands of dollars, to feel less worthy than my female peers.
Mara Altman takes a very Mary Roach approach to the questions she has about the human body—Why do women have to shave their legs and armpits? Why do dogs like sniffing crotches? What makes people faint?—and hunts down experts to answer those questions for her. She’s hilarious. I love Gross Anatomy, especially the bit about the butthole having two sphincters that tell you whether it’s a fart or a poop.
🦠 From Read These Weird Science Books at Crooked Reads.
February 8, 2022
Bardzo ciekawa książka, choć pewnie odebrałabym ją lepiej te kilka lat temu, kiedy sama miałam różne kompleksy czy nie byłam świadoma różnych rzeczy. Ale i tak ciekawie było wędrować z autorką przez te wszystkie anatomiczne zagadnienia.
August 12, 2019
Funny, irreverent, and very informative about bodily functions one always wondered about but didn't have the nerve to ask anyone, including doctors.
Told in a Mary Roach-ish style (irreverent, fearless, and candid, with in-depth research), Altman's narration about the various ways our bodies (mainly women's) can rebel is fascinating, informative, hilarious, and yes, a little gross. Just a few of the topics covered are over-zealous hair follicles, various secretions and odors that are emitted from various orifices, constipation and hemorrhoids, and even lice and "camel toe." And she isn't at all hesitant disclosing her own experiences and solutions.
There were a few chapters that seemed a little long but then those were another reviewer's favorite chapters so as they say "your mileage may vary."
If readers enjoy Mary Roach, by all means, read this book. Her writing tone and candidness also reminded me of Caitlin Doughty's books and Chelsea Handler's candid essays.
Another recommendation: If interested in well-researched books about women's issues, watch for The Vagina Bible: The Vulva and the Vagina: Separating the Myth from the Medicine which has lots of in-depth information by a nationally known OB-GYN.
Thanks to the publisher for the advance digital reading copy.
Told in a Mary Roach-ish style (irreverent, fearless, and candid, with in-depth research), Altman's narration about the various ways our bodies (mainly women's) can rebel is fascinating, informative, hilarious, and yes, a little gross. Just a few of the topics covered are over-zealous hair follicles, various secretions and odors that are emitted from various orifices, constipation and hemorrhoids, and even lice and "camel toe." And she isn't at all hesitant disclosing her own experiences and solutions.
There were a few chapters that seemed a little long but then those were another reviewer's favorite chapters so as they say "your mileage may vary."
If readers enjoy Mary Roach, by all means, read this book. Her writing tone and candidness also reminded me of Caitlin Doughty's books and Chelsea Handler's candid essays.
Another recommendation: If interested in well-researched books about women's issues, watch for The Vagina Bible: The Vulva and the Vagina: Separating the Myth from the Medicine which has lots of in-depth information by a nationally known OB-GYN.
Thanks to the publisher for the advance digital reading copy.
May 10, 2022
Niektóre tematy mnie trigerowały, wiem że to było celowe, ale po przeczytaniu mam takie mieszane uczucia wobec tej książki. Szanuje za odwagę by pisać / mówić o tym w szerszym gronie, ale sama jeszcze nie wiem czy to zostało przekazane w dobry sposób. Muszę to przemyśleć.
April 1, 2019
OY! This was like the longest and most in-your-face REAL chats with your girlfriends over drinks, if you could translate them all into the form of a book. Mara pulls from her own experiences with her most intimate body parts, including, but not limited to, her hair (E V E R Y W H E R E), sweat glands, vulva, and anus. She breaks up the anecdotal evidence of how uncomfortable it was to realize that on top of the "basic" female hair removal (legs, armpits, eyebrows), she had a mustache and stubbornly thick chin hairs which she obsessively bleached and plucked and lasered away for years. She befriended the CEO of a company that makes clothing specifically designed to conceal the dreaded "camel toe", or 11th toe, as Mara referred to it. She even took on the burden of a "scientific" experiment when she bought a douche kit and, despite a gynecologist's warning, she douched just to see why so many women did so, against better judgment.
On top of her first person experiences she hilariously details conversations with doctors, scientists, surgeons, at least one porn star, and a number of salon professionals to find out more about how and why our bodies function the way they do, as well as to dig into the truth about current practices to, well, make women look the way they wish, whether that's by bleaching their anus or paying for a labiaplasty. I loved how she documented the countless ways to beautify oneself, and made it clear that as long as you're not going to give yourself pelvic inflammatory disease (or worse) you can and are free to do whatever you'd like to. Our bodies are pretty gross even when they're functioning normally, so you've gotta do what you gotta do to stay both healthy and empowered.
On top of her first person experiences she hilariously details conversations with doctors, scientists, surgeons, at least one porn star, and a number of salon professionals to find out more about how and why our bodies function the way they do, as well as to dig into the truth about current practices to, well, make women look the way they wish, whether that's by bleaching their anus or paying for a labiaplasty. I loved how she documented the countless ways to beautify oneself, and made it clear that as long as you're not going to give yourself pelvic inflammatory disease (or worse) you can and are free to do whatever you'd like to. Our bodies are pretty gross even when they're functioning normally, so you've gotta do what you gotta do to stay both healthy and empowered.
February 13, 2019
"Mom, whether you like it or not, this book needs to end with two generations of women embracing their female bodies, so let's embrace, okay?"
Below reviews have described Gross Anatomy as "Mary Roach for millennials." Given the average age of millennials, I'd argue that Mary Roach makes a perfectly fine Mary Roach for millennials, but Altman is a lot of fun as well while tackling similar ground. The book is part memoir, part biology lesson, part gender studies treatise, and funny throughout. I could do without the author's habit of using fatness as metaphorical shorthand for sloppiness and unhealthiness (especially given how willing she is to extend sympathy and understanding to the less-glamorous functions of her own body), and the editor could stand to pay closer attention to word choice (just because two words sound the same doesn't mean they're interchangeable!), but this was a fun read full of fascinating, amusing, and uncomfortable facts about the how and why of our bodies.
Below reviews have described Gross Anatomy as "Mary Roach for millennials." Given the average age of millennials, I'd argue that Mary Roach makes a perfectly fine Mary Roach for millennials, but Altman is a lot of fun as well while tackling similar ground. The book is part memoir, part biology lesson, part gender studies treatise, and funny throughout. I could do without the author's habit of using fatness as metaphorical shorthand for sloppiness and unhealthiness (especially given how willing she is to extend sympathy and understanding to the less-glamorous functions of her own body), and the editor could stand to pay closer attention to word choice (just because two words sound the same doesn't mean they're interchangeable!), but this was a fun read full of fascinating, amusing, and uncomfortable facts about the how and why of our bodies.
October 6, 2018
Bless Mara Altman. As a 28-year-old woman who has been fighting the directives of her hormonally-challenged body for a decade of diagnosis, it is so relieving to have a person without PCOS, or Hashimoto’s, or adrenal displasia struggle with the same eight million neuroses that plague me. Altman, unafraid of baring her body or her soul for doctors, lovers, and readers, is an inspiration simply for being open and upfront about her bodily anxieties. Her writing is easy to read, her research is diverse, and she does not hesitate to reprimand herself for closed-minded thinking, illustrating that it is possible to confront our perceptions in a way that still allows us to grow. Thank goodness.
May 18, 2020
4.5
Це пізнавальна і смішна книжка про біди жіночого тіла. Майже в кожному розділі я знаходила те, що трохи заспокоювало мої печалі, бо думала, що я одна така кривенька і не дуже вдала у своїх батьків вийшла (ага, як той перший млинець).
Перший розділ мене підкорив і темою і гумором, а вже далі здалося, що авторка просто хоче здаватися щирою та насправді то не так. Ну хто з нас буде шукати "пупологів", бо його пупок як дулька? Чи спеціалістів із потовиділень? Це трішки дратувало, бо перший розділ здався мені дійсно щирим і в кінці я навіть зронила сльозу.
Та судячи з того, чим ця книжка закінчилася, автор, здається, і справді писала про те, що з нею відбувалося.
В цілому мені сподобалося. Навіть шкода, що "Тело дрянь" так швидко закінчилася.
Насміялася від душі та трішки заспокоїлася. Тіло - та ще штучка і проблеми з ним є у кожного.
Це пізнавальна і смішна книжка про біди жіночого тіла. Майже в кожному розділі я знаходила те, що трохи заспокоювало мої печалі, бо думала, що я одна така кривенька і не дуже вдала у своїх батьків вийшла (ага, як той перший млинець).
Перший розділ мене підкорив і темою і гумором, а вже далі здалося, що авторка просто хоче здаватися щирою та насправді то не так. Ну хто з нас буде шукати "пупологів", бо його пупок як дулька? Чи спеціалістів із потовиділень? Це трішки дратувало, бо перший розділ здався мені дійсно щирим і в кінці я навіть зронила сльозу.
Та судячи з того, чим ця книжка закінчилася, автор, здається, і справді писала про те, що з нею відбувалося.
В цілому мені сподобалося. Навіть шкода, що "Тело дрянь" так швидко закінчилася.
Насміялася від душі та трішки заспокоїлася. Тіло - та ще штучка і проблеми з ним є у кожного.
November 4, 2019
Находка этого года!
Читать, если есть проблемы с принятием своего тела. Читать, если просто хочется насладиться прекрасным стилем автора и посмеяться от души. Читать, если интересно углубиться в историю естественных вещей, за которые пытаются пристыдить современных женщин.
Однозначно читать!
Читать, если есть проблемы с принятием своего тела. Читать, если просто хочется насладиться прекрасным стилем автора и посмеяться от души. Читать, если интересно углубиться в историю естественных вещей, за которые пытаются пристыдить современных женщин.
Однозначно читать!
September 16, 2018
Ajta krajta. Vypadá to, že Mara Altman má hodně komplexů ze svého těla a psaní je pro ni terapie. A některé problémy jsou mnohem větší než jiné. Třeba hned první kapitola vás naprosto umoří, protože je celá o chloupcích. Pod nosem, v podpaží, v rozkroku, na břiše, na nohou, na palcích. Autorčina posedlost jejich hromadným zničením je místy až fascinující, bohužel ale nezná míru a její boj s chlupy je zdánlivě nekončící.
Každá kapitola je koncipována stejně - představí se "problém", kterým Altman buďto trpí (nadměrné pocení, knírek, vystouplý pupík) nebo o něm hodně přemýšlí (např. aroma vagíny). Pak se na tento problém ptá několika odborníků - od skutečných akademiků a vědců až po pornoherečku (anální sex). Do toho přimíchává své poznámky a zkušenosti a snaží se to celé pojmout s humorem.
Tady nastává kámen úrazu, protože Altman pro mě není příliš vtipná. Celou knihu jsem váhala, jestli ji mám litovat (protože ta dáma má se svým tělem očividně problémy) nebo nad ní kroutit hlavou. Upřímně si nejsem jistá, jestli své problémy nadsazuje až do místy absurdní roviny nebo to tak skutečně cítí. Buď jak buď, ona nadsázka a nafukování nepříliš dobře funguje.
Dost možná je ale i problém v tom, že jsem se s touhle knihou nedokázala příliž ztotožnit. Jistě, taky používám epilátor, deodorant, atd. I na mém těle jsou věci, které mi lezou na nervy. Ale nikdy jsem nad tím tak nerozjímala, a proto se mi asi komplexy vyhnuly. Altman pro mě tak představovala spíše extrémní verzi neustále se pozorujícího člověka, který má panickou hrůzu z toho, že jeho tělo udělá něco nepředvídatelně ohavného (jako že mu vyraší čarodějnický chloupek na bradě či co).
Nebo jsem zklamaná z toho, jak všeobecná ta kniha je. Většina z informací není nijak hodnotná nebo neznámá (a tímhle trpí zejména kapitola o holení), nejvíc jsem koukala na "douching". Pro ty (jako dosud já) neznalé, je to vyplachování vagíny aromatickým a jiným svinstvem, aby vám pěkně voněla. U toho si ale samozřejmě zničíte všechny ty bakterie, které tam být mají. Douching je podle mě spíše americkou záležitostí, protože jak jsem googlila, jak jsem googlila, přesný český ekvivalent (a pomůcky k tomuto, které nejsou určené pro infekce) jsem nenalezla. A když už, tak to byly intimní sprchy zejména pro anální sex ;)
Takže douching nebrat a doufám, že se k nám tahle pitomost ani nedostane.
Stejně tak jsem netušila, jaký fenomén je "cameltoe".
Altman vycpává úmorně dlouhé kapitoly těmi absurdně krátkými (jako o bradavicích), které jsou tam vlastně navíc, protože o nich očividně nemá moc co říct a nijak extra se jimi nezaobírá. Překvapuje mě taky absence akné a pupínků, vzhledem k názvu knihy bych je tam očekávala.
Abych to shrnula; s touto knihou jsem se naprosto minula. Autorčin projev mi není nijak zvlášť sympatický, poskytnuté informace jsou často matoucí či neúplné (obzvláště u sekce s PMS či vagínou všeobecně doporučuji raději The Wonder Down Under). Zajímavé je to nejvíce jako studie těla jedné ženy v celé své (nechutné?) nádheře.
Každá kapitola je koncipována stejně - představí se "problém", kterým Altman buďto trpí (nadměrné pocení, knírek, vystouplý pupík) nebo o něm hodně přemýšlí (např. aroma vagíny). Pak se na tento problém ptá několika odborníků - od skutečných akademiků a vědců až po pornoherečku (anální sex). Do toho přimíchává své poznámky a zkušenosti a snaží se to celé pojmout s humorem.
Tady nastává kámen úrazu, protože Altman pro mě není příliš vtipná. Celou knihu jsem váhala, jestli ji mám litovat (protože ta dáma má se svým tělem očividně problémy) nebo nad ní kroutit hlavou. Upřímně si nejsem jistá, jestli své problémy nadsazuje až do místy absurdní roviny nebo to tak skutečně cítí. Buď jak buď, ona nadsázka a nafukování nepříliš dobře funguje.
Dost možná je ale i problém v tom, že jsem se s touhle knihou nedokázala příliž ztotožnit. Jistě, taky používám epilátor, deodorant, atd. I na mém těle jsou věci, které mi lezou na nervy. Ale nikdy jsem nad tím tak nerozjímala, a proto se mi asi komplexy vyhnuly. Altman pro mě tak představovala spíše extrémní verzi neustále se pozorujícího člověka, který má panickou hrůzu z toho, že jeho tělo udělá něco nepředvídatelně ohavného (jako že mu vyraší čarodějnický chloupek na bradě či co).
Nebo jsem zklamaná z toho, jak všeobecná ta kniha je. Většina z informací není nijak hodnotná nebo neznámá (a tímhle trpí zejména kapitola o holení), nejvíc jsem koukala na "douching". Pro ty (jako dosud já) neznalé, je to vyplachování vagíny aromatickým a jiným svinstvem, aby vám pěkně voněla. U toho si ale samozřejmě zničíte všechny ty bakterie, které tam být mají. Douching je podle mě spíše americkou záležitostí, protože jak jsem googlila, jak jsem googlila, přesný český ekvivalent (a pomůcky k tomuto, které nejsou určené pro infekce) jsem nenalezla. A když už, tak to byly intimní sprchy zejména pro anální sex ;)
Takže douching nebrat a doufám, že se k nám tahle pitomost ani nedostane.
Stejně tak jsem netušila, jaký fenomén je "cameltoe".
Altman vycpává úmorně dlouhé kapitoly těmi absurdně krátkými (jako o bradavicích), které jsou tam vlastně navíc, protože o nich očividně nemá moc co říct a nijak extra se jimi nezaobírá. Překvapuje mě taky absence akné a pupínků, vzhledem k názvu knihy bych je tam očekávala.
Abych to shrnula; s touto knihou jsem se naprosto minula. Autorčin projev mi není nijak zvlášť sympatický, poskytnuté informace jsou často matoucí či neúplné (obzvláště u sekce s PMS či vagínou všeobecně doporučuji raději The Wonder Down Under). Zajímavé je to nejvíce jako studie těla jedné ženy v celé své (nechutné?) nádheře.
Read
August 31, 2018A wildly engaging and funny look at all of the parts of being a human in a human body in the Western world that too often, we ignore, laugh about, or pretend are things we don't have to deal with. Altman is smart and curious and asks lots of great questions to professionals to find answers to her questions about everything from pooping to chin hair to warts and PMS.
This has been described like Mary Roach but with more humor, and this is a great description. At times, the essays are a little long and the humor relies on some easy and lazy reaches (I cringed a couple of times from the writing, like when Mara mentions being a "chubby-chaser") but it's so minimal in the grand scheme of a fascinating book. It's a book that never explores the human body in a way that's meant to make you think it's gross. It's meant to remind you it is what it is and it is absolutely fascinating. And we still know so little.
Big takeaways for me: how and where douche as an insult came to be and why it's misogynist, the idea that PMS might be a sign of your need to practice better self-care, and that there are smarter ways to poop that rely on abdomen pressure (it's not gross -- we all do it and also, it's a nice complement to the knowledge I got from teaching yoga about how to get one's body moving when everything's feeling all blocked up).
This has been described like Mary Roach but with more humor, and this is a great description. At times, the essays are a little long and the humor relies on some easy and lazy reaches (I cringed a couple of times from the writing, like when Mara mentions being a "chubby-chaser") but it's so minimal in the grand scheme of a fascinating book. It's a book that never explores the human body in a way that's meant to make you think it's gross. It's meant to remind you it is what it is and it is absolutely fascinating. And we still know so little.
Big takeaways for me: how and where douche as an insult came to be and why it's misogynist, the idea that PMS might be a sign of your need to practice better self-care, and that there are smarter ways to poop that rely on abdomen pressure (it's not gross -- we all do it and also, it's a nice complement to the knowledge I got from teaching yoga about how to get one's body moving when everything's feeling all blocked up).
August 2, 2018
I loved this book. It certainly isn't your everyday anatomy book. Mara Altman seems to have always had a love-hate relationship with her body and a massively large helping of curiosity.
She just didn't accept the fact that certain parts of the female body are problematic, she picked a
problem area, such as stinky armpits, and hunted down people she thought could help her understand armpit stink. She always talked to at least two experts who were studying armpit stink from different perspectives. She didn't fool around. She wanted information so she could decide if she was dealing with the problem properly, at least for her. Seriously, she has put inordinate amount of time and effort into finding out the why and wherefore of the problem parts of the female body. She is self deprecating and does it with her wonderful dry sense of humor. You will find out by reading this book, things you never thought about. With Mara Altman's storytelling ability, she could explain the sex life of a fly and make it fascinating, or at least interesting.
I would really like to get to know her.
I won this book in a Goodreads giveaway.
She just didn't accept the fact that certain parts of the female body are problematic, she picked a
problem area, such as stinky armpits, and hunted down people she thought could help her understand armpit stink. She always talked to at least two experts who were studying armpit stink from different perspectives. She didn't fool around. She wanted information so she could decide if she was dealing with the problem properly, at least for her. Seriously, she has put inordinate amount of time and effort into finding out the why and wherefore of the problem parts of the female body. She is self deprecating and does it with her wonderful dry sense of humor. You will find out by reading this book, things you never thought about. With Mara Altman's storytelling ability, she could explain the sex life of a fly and make it fascinating, or at least interesting.
I would really like to get to know her.
I won this book in a Goodreads giveaway.
August 26, 2018
First of all, I feel offended. This book only has 2 ratings on Goodreads!!! What kind of world am I living in? One where people don’t read books that talk about most things women have to deal with and experience throughout their entire lives? And not just women, but everyone? A world where people don’t read hilarious, honest, entertaining real stories? What is this life?
Let me tell you something:
Gross Anatomy is one of the best books I’ve ever read and one of the most important ones I’ve read as an adult woman. It is one of the very few books that have made me spit my drink as I read a particularly funny sentence (mind you, this book is funny from start to finish but Mara Altman can come up with the most ludicrous comparisons and you’ll have no choice but to a) suffocate whilst trying not to crack up in public or b) laugh uncontrollably until someone asks you what’s so funny with the ‘superior’ look of someone who doesn’t laugh at funny things.) Yes, this book is that funny.
Read my full review here
Let me tell you something:
Gross Anatomy is one of the best books I’ve ever read and one of the most important ones I’ve read as an adult woman. It is one of the very few books that have made me spit my drink as I read a particularly funny sentence (mind you, this book is funny from start to finish but Mara Altman can come up with the most ludicrous comparisons and you’ll have no choice but to a) suffocate whilst trying not to crack up in public or b) laugh uncontrollably until someone asks you what’s so funny with the ‘superior’ look of someone who doesn’t laugh at funny things.) Yes, this book is that funny.
Read my full review here
May 18, 2021
Gross Anatomy Or Petition To Rename Camel Toe to Koala Paw
If you've ever had a moment where you body has betrayed you and you wonder, "Why are you like this?" then this is the book for you. Mara Altman has questions. Excessive sweating, why?! Hemorrhoids, why?! PMS, real or fake?! She then tracks down the experts and try to find out why we are the way we are. The book is full of cool/weird little medical tidbits and Altman's funny running commentary. While the book doesn't go into too much depth about any one thing it does give you enough to not feel like a total freak of nature. This book is best enjoyed on the phone with your most trusted friend while you compare the length of your nipple hair and wonder, "Nipple hair, why?"
If you've ever had a moment where you body has betrayed you and you wonder, "Why are you like this?" then this is the book for you. Mara Altman has questions. Excessive sweating, why?! Hemorrhoids, why?! PMS, real or fake?! She then tracks down the experts and try to find out why we are the way we are. The book is full of cool/weird little medical tidbits and Altman's funny running commentary. While the book doesn't go into too much depth about any one thing it does give you enough to not feel like a total freak of nature. This book is best enjoyed on the phone with your most trusted friend while you compare the length of your nipple hair and wonder, "Nipple hair, why?"
August 8, 2018
Hilarious self-deprecating humor backed by scientific facts most of the time and strong professional opinions based on scientific research, make this a tremendously humorous and honest look at women’s bodies, issues and the stigmas that surround the feminine. This is a favorite and I already have friends and family lining up to read it. I also want to mention that the illustrations add to the laughter!
March 2, 2019
4.5 I loved it and I especially recommend listening to the audio, read by the author. I am wondering at what age it will be appropriate to give to my daughters because Mara Altman discusses many of those bodily things that are rarely talked about and helps normalize them. It's nice to know you aren't alone and I definitely could've used that message as a teen.
While this is totally not the point of the book, Mara and Dave are my OTP. Find a partner who will welcome you with open arms after you fainted and peed yourself and who will check your head for lice one billion times (but maybe one who is better at spotting them than Dave was).
While this is totally not the point of the book, Mara and Dave are my OTP. Find a partner who will welcome you with open arms after you fainted and peed yourself and who will check your head for lice one billion times (but maybe one who is better at spotting them than Dave was).
July 12, 2021
Mara Altman’s honest and informative examination of her own body applies to every woman. She openly explores body sweat, douches, camel toes, PMS, hemorrhoids, butt sex, labiaplasties, the smells and fluids her body produces and unwanted hair - all in hysterical detail. She reminds me of a cross between Sarah Vowell and Mary Roach. I love her brutal honesty and unabashed writing. I listened to the audiobook, but I heard the actual book has entertaining illustrations. Word to the wise - if you are listening to this audiobook, maybe wear headphones and don’t play this through the car speakers with your father in the passenger seat. 😳🤭💀🙈
dropped
October 16, 2024At first, I liked the more casual approach to the topic, but at this 9% mark it just feels like too much personal info. I wish it were more educational, with just some sprinkles of the author's pleasant personality.
February 15, 2023
Very frank, VERY funny. Very enjoyable.
November 2, 2019
Даже не за что зацепиться. Набор плоских шуток в попытке объяснить элементарные анатомические вещи про женское тело. Даже тем, у кого нет комплексов по поводу растущих волос, станет противно.
После прочтения немного тошнит.
После прочтения немного тошнит.
April 24, 2020
Ocena: 4-
Wrażenia: Pierwszy rozdział ciągnął się w nieskończoność i w końcu mnie znudził, książkę na jakiś miesiąc odłożyłam, ale na szczęście do niej wróciłam, bo im dalej, tym lepiej. Dużo dużo o akceptacji swojego ciała i to z poczuciem humoru.
Dla kogo: Dla kobiet.
Wrażenia: Pierwszy rozdział ciągnął się w nieskończoność i w końcu mnie znudził, książkę na jakiś miesiąc odłożyłam, ale na szczęście do niej wróciłam, bo im dalej, tym lepiej. Dużo dużo o akceptacji swojego ciała i to z poczuciem humoru.
Dla kogo: Dla kobiet.
July 31, 2019
I feel bad giving any book two stars, but this was a frustrating read. Admittedly I’ve consumed a lot of feminist books over the last few years, so maybe I was coming at this one from the wrong place, but when I saw the words FEMALE BODY, coupled with GROSS ANATOMY I was ready for some serious intellectual delving into the bullshit that is what the patriarchy and misogyny has inflicted upon women since ancient times. I wanted to be enraged and educated; I wanted to end up enlightened and empowered. Sadly, I just feel disappointed.
This is very much a light read. Its main goal seems to be to make you laugh, as pretty much every other sentence is a joke. This might be a case of its me, not you, as while a bit of wry humour can be a welcome break in non fiction, constant jokes are not my thing. There are also many anecdotes, this is a book that massively revolves around Altman’s own experiences, and occasionally they are interesting, but mostly they’re the kind of thing that I would only really listen to if a friend or family member had gone through it. A whole chapter about nits that mostly consists of a birthday evening and then a honeymoon story with nits finally showing up at the very end is definitely the latter.
Altman converses with many ‘experts’ along the course of this book, some seeming to be bona fide experts, while at the other end of the spectrum we have random men replying to a Craigslist post. Honestly, I have absolutely zero, in fact minus, interest in what some random bloke who is drawn to reply to such a post thinks about the smell of vagina. Whether proper expert or not, everyone gets very limited time here. There is no real delving into any topic, think quantity rather than quality. Think conflicting opinions.
A real bugbear I had was that Altman planted herself firmly on the fence. You can tell she’s mostly swaying towards feminist opinion, but always with a reassuring nod to the other side, so as not to offend anyone. I say again, this is a light-hearted book, a comedic book, she isn’t setting out to make your blood boil, but when dealing with the female body, on some subjects I want my blood boiling. Tbh I was mostly bemused. Lots of the things that are obsessed over negatively in this book are things I literally never think about. The smell of my vagina? Pubes? Camel toe? Why I look crap in photos? I just don’t care about any of that, so it was hard to jump onto the body positive train when I must have boarded it many years ago.
There’s definitely filler. The bellybutton chapter. The birthmark chapter. The nits chapter. The fainting chapter. I would have loved longer chapters on body hair, breasts, vulvas, periods; some focus on age and culture and race and weight. I guess I just want the book I was hoping for... My not enjoying this doesn’t mean others won’t enjoy it. I do think Altman knows how to tell a joke, and if jokes are your thing, this may be your thing. It has a definite humorous magazine column vibe to it. I think Altman is good at what she does, I just feel the name of the book plus the body positivity claims on the blurb can easily suggest a different kind of book.
This is very much a light read. Its main goal seems to be to make you laugh, as pretty much every other sentence is a joke. This might be a case of its me, not you, as while a bit of wry humour can be a welcome break in non fiction, constant jokes are not my thing. There are also many anecdotes, this is a book that massively revolves around Altman’s own experiences, and occasionally they are interesting, but mostly they’re the kind of thing that I would only really listen to if a friend or family member had gone through it. A whole chapter about nits that mostly consists of a birthday evening and then a honeymoon story with nits finally showing up at the very end is definitely the latter.
Altman converses with many ‘experts’ along the course of this book, some seeming to be bona fide experts, while at the other end of the spectrum we have random men replying to a Craigslist post. Honestly, I have absolutely zero, in fact minus, interest in what some random bloke who is drawn to reply to such a post thinks about the smell of vagina. Whether proper expert or not, everyone gets very limited time here. There is no real delving into any topic, think quantity rather than quality. Think conflicting opinions.
A real bugbear I had was that Altman planted herself firmly on the fence. You can tell she’s mostly swaying towards feminist opinion, but always with a reassuring nod to the other side, so as not to offend anyone. I say again, this is a light-hearted book, a comedic book, she isn’t setting out to make your blood boil, but when dealing with the female body, on some subjects I want my blood boiling. Tbh I was mostly bemused. Lots of the things that are obsessed over negatively in this book are things I literally never think about. The smell of my vagina? Pubes? Camel toe? Why I look crap in photos? I just don’t care about any of that, so it was hard to jump onto the body positive train when I must have boarded it many years ago.
There’s definitely filler. The bellybutton chapter. The birthmark chapter. The nits chapter. The fainting chapter. I would have loved longer chapters on body hair, breasts, vulvas, periods; some focus on age and culture and race and weight. I guess I just want the book I was hoping for... My not enjoying this doesn’t mean others won’t enjoy it. I do think Altman knows how to tell a joke, and if jokes are your thing, this may be your thing. It has a definite humorous magazine column vibe to it. I think Altman is good at what she does, I just feel the name of the book plus the body positivity claims on the blurb can easily suggest a different kind of book.
November 11, 2019
I realize that when embarking on my journey with this book I was not the target audience. If not for a fairly strong shove I would probably not have ever picked a copy up. As blokes, we are all fairly clueless as to what women go through in their daily lives. It for the most part to us is just an accepted fact that women take far longer in the bathroom than us. I have never even questioned why girlfriends have taken so long or what might be going on. It is in part to my shame, not something that has ever occurred. I suppose while both sexes interact on a daily basis we don't really think all that much about the gross bits. In some ways, in reading this book I started to realize that there is a great deal that worries us both about how we appear.
Men for there part tend to try and ignore these things we are programmed to bury them deep down and never under any circumstance talk about it. Altman gave me a window into the other side, to show just how much worry and anxiety can build up. This need to outwardly project this perfect image of what a woman should be. Not to mention the constant hunter for a younger look. This overpowering urge to be young again. I think it is one that affects everyone in some part we all wish we could be that young and carefree again. I like that she gives these thoughts over in straight forward and matter of fact ways. This is someone who doesn't believe in sugar-coating things. It is both heartwarming and also a little frightening.
While she does her best to frame each of the chapters in a humors way I found it saddening the worry she inflicts on herself. I suppose there is something to be said for us all feeling alone in this world. The worst part of our selves we feel we suffer alone. It is through the wise wisdom of Altman that we are shown this simply isn't true. While there are a great many situations she describes I will never experience for myself self I felt she does an amazing job of expressing them to both those who have and those who never will. I don't wish to make out this book is about some sad sake, By far it is the very contrast of that. This is a woman who has come to accept that not all will be perfect but you know what fuck it. It's about accepting our flaws and realizing we are not alone. That the human body is a gross and strange thing, it will always be guaranteed to do the one thing we don't want it to do at the worst possible moment.
I want to thank Altman for writing this book, I fully appreciate that when she sat down to put pen to paper, I was never her target audience. But she has opened my eyes to a great deal and also helped me accept a few of my own body's strange quirks. If you have ever questioned your own bodies strange behavior then Altman is here for you. Be it hemorrhoid's to unwanted body hair she's there to hold your hand and let you laugh at just how absurd it all really is when you come to think about it.
Men for there part tend to try and ignore these things we are programmed to bury them deep down and never under any circumstance talk about it. Altman gave me a window into the other side, to show just how much worry and anxiety can build up. This need to outwardly project this perfect image of what a woman should be. Not to mention the constant hunter for a younger look. This overpowering urge to be young again. I think it is one that affects everyone in some part we all wish we could be that young and carefree again. I like that she gives these thoughts over in straight forward and matter of fact ways. This is someone who doesn't believe in sugar-coating things. It is both heartwarming and also a little frightening.
While she does her best to frame each of the chapters in a humors way I found it saddening the worry she inflicts on herself. I suppose there is something to be said for us all feeling alone in this world. The worst part of our selves we feel we suffer alone. It is through the wise wisdom of Altman that we are shown this simply isn't true. While there are a great many situations she describes I will never experience for myself self I felt she does an amazing job of expressing them to both those who have and those who never will. I don't wish to make out this book is about some sad sake, By far it is the very contrast of that. This is a woman who has come to accept that not all will be perfect but you know what fuck it. It's about accepting our flaws and realizing we are not alone. That the human body is a gross and strange thing, it will always be guaranteed to do the one thing we don't want it to do at the worst possible moment.
I want to thank Altman for writing this book, I fully appreciate that when she sat down to put pen to paper, I was never her target audience. But she has opened my eyes to a great deal and also helped me accept a few of my own body's strange quirks. If you have ever questioned your own bodies strange behavior then Altman is here for you. Be it hemorrhoid's to unwanted body hair she's there to hold your hand and let you laugh at just how absurd it all really is when you come to think about it.
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