Amphibian

by Christina Neuwirth

It’s summer in Edinburgh. Rose Ellis arrives at MoneyTownCashGrowth one morning to find that the entire fourth floor has been flooded with water, in a desperate attempt to improve productivity. As the water steadily rises, her working situation becomes more and more absurd…

Genres: Novella, Fiction, Scotland, Literary Fiction, Queer, Book Club

Unknown Binding

Reviews

[Lola Keeley · Rating 5 out of 5]

So witty, so clever. Loved the metaphors great and small, and the absurdity was perfectly pitched.

[Helen McClory · Rating 5 out of 5]

perfectly-proportioned absurdism, glittering with sharp observations of corporate life.

[Marina · Rating 5 out of 5]

Brilliant debut novella by Christina Neuwirth - incredibly witty and satirical addressing a topic that (sadly) many of us can relate to. The futility of working for a greedy company that couldn't care less about its employees or customers.

Really well-written, amusing and sharp; and it will leave you wanting more.

[anna marie · Rating 3 out of 5]

i think 3.5 ? the absurdity of late stage capitalism & obnoxious corporate culture combine... also i love the octopus

[JK · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was so grateful to receive an advance review copy of this as I’m unable to attend the launch night. As someone who is embroiled daily in the beige life of a working environment, I knew a story of an office slowly becoming filled with water was something I absolutely could not miss.

Neuwirth immediately pinched me with her satire in two different ways. The first was in discovering the reason for the office’s submergence was staff punishment for low sales. I have extensive management experience in providing incentives for good performance and measures for poor, but forcing staff to work half underwater to boost profit is a cruel and perfect caricature of any measure either myself or a colleague has naively taken. Neuwirth ripping the soul out of all banal management tactics and everyday office etiquette was utterly perfect, and resonated like a shine of glee. Needless to say, the second pinch of satire, a member of management using the phrase “get the synergy going” highlighted how perfectly Neuwirth has nailed this environment, and made me lovingly recall some of the excellent boardroom bullshit phrases I’ve heard over the years.

The characters are incredible in their relatability and reality, with each of them smoothly representing exact copies of people I have in my life, from the successful friend who makes you question your own career choices, to the guy in work who saves your life every morning by remembering to buy the biscuits.

Another area of reality Neuwirth creates is that of being trapped. We’ve all been there – whether it’s trapped in the office when you want to go home, or trapped in your role in general, Neuwirth expands and reinforces this feeling throughout the pages. By turning the office into an aquarium, and giving the staff absolutely no power to change this, nor to escape, the feeling of helplessness is everywhere. That the situation doesn’t shock the characters as much as it should, and that the measures management take to ‘help’ – such as nailing the keyboards to the desk to stop them floating around – is completely akin to standard business norms, albeit on a slightly less aquatic scale.

My only real complaint here was that, despite my attempts to savour the novella, I ploughed through like a woman possessed in a mere few hours. I could have read about snorkel-wearing employees working alongside an errant octopus for far longer.

Amphibian is only a small cup of Neuwirth’s talent, but having read this and also her piece in Nasty Women , I am very excited to read anything else her cutting and hilarious mind comes up with next – thank you for allowing me to read this before release date, it’s been a big wet pleasure.

[Kaysy Ostrom · Rating 5 out of 5]

This little novella does not hold back! It's terribly funny while also being thoughtful and having a lot to say. I especially love the way that as the water rises in Rose's workplace so does the book's absurdity. This gradual build kept me turning the pages and wondering what insane place we would end up in the final chapter. I absolutely adored the ending: a pure delight all the way through <3

[Simone · Rating 5 out of 5]

I adore this weird, watery novella! Rose works in an office that is slowly being flooded by management in an effort to push the workers to sell more Bonds and Promises. I loved the small, sharp details that will make anyone who has ever worked in an office nod along in commiseration (an example being management informing workers that it's unprofessional to swim along the corridors - walking only), and how the story exposes the ridiculousness of every day working life - from our relationships with our colleagues, the banality of our office environments, and how completely out of touch our employers are. It's funny and smart read, with a strong, kind heart. 10/10 recommend.

[Emma Johns · Rating 5 out of 5]

I went to Edinburgh for a holiday and visited a cute bookshop (Lighthouse Books) with the aim of picking up a little Scottish read.

This was the perfect little holiday read. Similar vibes to a Kafka book I read a while back.

It’s surreal, a little amusing and just does what it set out to do.

[Alba · Rating 3 out of 5]

3,5 ⭐️ bastante divertido lo recomiendo

[Beth S · Rating 5 out of 5]

Witty and satirical, worth a read for the absurdity and dry humour alone.

[Sam Ross · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absurd premise with fun, quirky execution. Loved this world of corporate accountability gone mad

[Coral Davies · Rating 4 out of 5]

One day, Rose receives an email from her line manager; due to poor performance amongst the Sales team, management have decided to start slowly flooding the fourth floor of the building to help encourage productivity.

Sound bonkers? That's the premise of the curious little novella that packs such a punch in a handful of pages.

There's a lot to be said about what people will put up with, especially if they function within a group that aren't reacting to the situation, and the people in charge tell you "everything's ok". So Rose puts up with this bizarre situation. As do her colleagues. She strives to adapt, emailing head office practical situations to improve the situation - lockers to get changed after work, waterproof shoes that are professional and practical etc - even while she day dreams of running away to her dream life as a skipper on a boat in Greece. Yes, practical suggestions, not very practical dreams.

I loved the design of the book, how the chapter headings flooded with the passage of time. It was a lovely touch.

I did feel frustrated with the ending, if unsurprised. My main gripe was I wanted to understand more about the larger world and how or why companies would think this a great way of improving performance, and also what the hell she actually sold. Was it literally just bits of paper with random promises on? That wasn't specified as clearly or coherently as it could have been.

Otherw, se I highly recommend this quick read. Excellent writing, compelling narrative, curious characters. I really hope more is published by this author.

[Danielle · Rating 4 out of 5]

Amphibian follows rose who works in an office job which is underperforming. To combat this issue ross’ boss decided to submerge their floor underwater to try and increase productivity. When productivity is achieved to the appropriate level then the water may begin to retreat but will it?

This was such a quirky read and I don’t think I’ve ever read anything like it before. It was a page Turner and left me wanting to continue reading. I finished it in one afternoon as it is just a short story but I find my self thinking about it even after it’s ended as I can’t quite make sense of it. The writing was excellent and the storyline was just outrageously bizarre. I thoroughly enjoyed the read even if I am a little puzzled with the experience.

[Rosamund Taylor · Rating 4 out of 5]

I picked this up in the wonderful Edinburgh independent book shop, Lighthouse Books. It's an imaginative, surreal novella, in which a floor of an office building is slowly filling with water. This is because the workers are deemed by the administration not to be performing well enough. First the water rises to their ankles, and then gradually swallows them up. This element is developed in absolutely realistic manner, exploring what it would mean to work under water, but it's also a clever commentary on office life, and the arbitrary decisions of management. A witty, angry book -- recommended.

[Kris · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed reading this wonderful little novella. It's a truly witty, smart and thoughtful read filled with creative metaphors and ideas. The author's writing style and perfectly described little details made me feel like I was a part of the...watery...office situation. I love how the story becomes more and more absurd, which made it a pleasurable, witty reading reading experience till the very last page. Highly recommended for anyone who is not scared of water. ;) I am definitely looking forward to reading more from this talented young author!

[Moira McPartlin · Rating 4 out of 5]

Rose works at MoneyTownCashGrowth, a company that sells promises. One day she arrives to find the management has ordered the office floor to be flooded in a move to increase productivity. What follows is a bazaar week where the office gradually fills with water while the staff battle to adapt to the conditions. It sounds like a weird plot but I found this novella hugely enjoyable. I cant wait for the next offering by this talented author.

[Nell . · Rating 3 out of 5]

Funky little book, 3.5/5 stars

I think this is one of those where I'd need to ponder on it for a while.

I mainly enjoyed it because it's set in Edinburgh and reading about bits and places of the city brings Joy. It's a crazy book as in it doesn't really make sense, but on a deeper level, it does? Much confusion, let's ponder.

[Ruth Jenkins · Rating 4 out of 5]

A Kafkaesque novella in which the 4th floor of an office building is flooded to increase efficiencies and sales. I enjoyed the simultaneous outrage and adaptation of the office workers. Short and sweet and strange.

[Jay · Rating 4 out of 5]

This really does capture the absurdity of corporate office life perfectly. There were moments I compared it to my own work life, which shouldn’t be so easy when the comparison is chest deep water, snorkels and wandering octopi.

[Katie McCandless · Rating 3 out of 5]

Picked this up at Lighthouse Books, one of the world’s best bookstores, in Edinburgh. Satire isn’t for me (a lesson I keep having to learn), but I’m happy to have this little gem, signed by the author with a drawing of a whale, on my shelf.

[Ali Fox · Rating 4 out of 5]

Funny, acerbic writing.

[FremsleytheSparrow · Rating 4 out of 5]

Surrealist satire at its finest. The end will leave one with very mixed feelings. Do read this if you've ever been trapped in a horrible office job, especially in the financial sector . . .

[Hayley · Rating 3 out of 5]

Really fun and weird concept. Not sure I liked where it went. It lost me somewhat.

[Lisa · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars

[Phoe · Rating 4 out of 5]

Sharp, funny, ridiculous. Called to mind Evelyn Waugh’s Decline and Fall. Some of the naming conventions a little too on the nose, but otherwise, gloriously surreal.

[Caroline Allen · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is the type of absurdism I love. Great book and quick read.

[elle · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5 ⭐️

[grosbeak · Rating 5 out of 5]

*delighted screaming forever*

[Simi · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.75

An interesting concept and at times, funny. As it’s such a short book I think there was space to expand the story and the characters relationships.

[Anna Scott · Rating 4 out of 5]

Amphibian is an excellent read; short, witty and incredibly well written. I found Rose, the main character, an excellent narrator. An excellent