بندقية صيد

by Yasushi Inoue, ياسوشي اينوي, سهام حرب (ترجمة، تحقيق)

"The Hunting Gun, set in the period immediately after the Second World War, is the story of a tragic love affair and its psychological impact - not only on the lovers themselves but on all those close to them. The narrative is related from three points of view: Saiko, the guilt-ridden mistress; Shoko, her pathetic, disillusioned daughter; and Midori, the sophisticated but unhappy wife of Shoko's lover. This triangle is focused on Josuke, the husband-lover whose lonely, insular existence is symbolized by the hunting gun. Inoue displays a remarkable understanding of the psyche and an innate flair for dramatic incident, as well as a keen sympathy for the social milieu of Ashiya, an exclusive suburb of the great commerical cities of Osaka and Kobe. At once a study of everyday personal relationships and of the social and historic circumstances they mirror, The Hunting Gun remains timely and universal - a classic of modern Japanese literature."--BOOK JACKET.

Genres: Japan, Fiction, Japanese Literature, Classics, Asia, Short Stories, Romance

112 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 1949

About the author

Yasushi Inoue (井上靖) was a Japanese writer whose range of genres included poetry, essays, short fiction, and novels.

Inoue is famous for his serious historical fiction of ancient Japan and the Asian continent, including Wind and Waves, Tun-huang, and Confucius, but his work also included semi-autobiographical novels and short fiction of great humor, pathos, and wisdom like Shirobamba and Asunaro Monogatari, which depicted the setting of the author's own life — Japan of the early to mid twentieth century — in revealing perspective.

1936 Chiba Kameo Prize --- Ruten,流転
1950 Akutagawa Prize --- Tōgyu,闘牛
1957 Ministry of Education Prize for Literature --- The Roof Tile of Tempyo,天平の甍
1959 Mainichi Press Prize --- Tun-huang,敦煌
1963 Yomiuri Prize --- Fūtō,風濤

(from Wikipedia)

Reviews

[Orsodimondo · Rating 4 out of 5]

DETTO NON DETTO



Frusci di vesti femminili, di porte leggere, di piedi senza scarpe che scivolano rapidi su pavimenti di legno.
Il fuoco e il gelo, il ghiaccio e l’incendio.
Scrittura chiara, scorrevole, nitida, di grande eleganza, che sembra semplice, eppure capace di scandagliare nelle profondità dell’animo umano, sia maschile che femminile.
La vita è un mistero che la scrittura tenta di svelare spingendosi oltre l’apparenza.
Ma raggiunge lo scopo? Non si rafforza forse il mistero della vita col mistero della morte?



Struttura composita, affascinante, stimolante, a suo modo complessa.
Yasushi è critico d’arte, poeta e romanziere – in questo breve romanzo dice di aver scritto una poesia nata in seguito a un incontro fortuito, un cacciatore col fucile in spalla, un’immagine che al poeta ha ispirato solitudine.
Dopo la pubblicazione della poesia riceve una lettera dal cacciatore col fucile in spalla che si è riconosciuto nella poesia – insieme a questa lettera ne manda altre tre a lui indirizzate, vuole che il poeta le legga e si faccia un’idea.
Le tre lettere sono di tre donne diverse, la nipote, la moglie, l’amante, ed esprimono il dolore di amare e la felicità di essere amate.
Esprimono tre diverse forme d’amore, tre diversi segreti rivelati, ma anche tre diverse forme di addio, rivelano che c’è un intreccio di vita e relazioni dietro l’apparenza della solitudine.



L’amore dichiarato nelle lettere contraddice la solitudine che l’immagine del cacciatore col fucile in spalla ha suscitato nel poeta.
Ma gli addii la confermano, e addirittura rafforzano.

Non c’è condanna per nessuno, il narratore, poeta e scrittore, non esprime giudizio.
Sembra volersi associare al silenzio dignitoso del cacciatore che cammina nel bosco col fucile in spalla.
Il narratore, poeta e scrittore, adesso sa, conosce ed è consapevole di cosa circonda l’immagine del cacciatore col fucile in spalla che si è impressa sulla sua immaginazione, a suo modo conserva il segreto che ora condivide.

[Guille · Rating 5 out of 5]

Me ha parecido una obra bellísima, inteligente y bellísima, profunda y bellísima, elegante y bellísima, triste y… sí, bellísima.

La soledad en la que en el fondo todos vivimos no puede expresarse mejor con tan poco:

“Creo que es una gran locura en el hombre el querer que otro le comprenda.”

[Fionnuala]

You probably know the expression 'a bullet in the post'?
It used to be an intimidation tool, and may still be in some parts of the world. The one who sends it is usually the one with the gun, the aim being to threaten the receiver's peace of mind.

In Yasushi Inoue's The Hunting Gun, there is no mention of guns being fired or even of bullets. But the one who owns the hunting gun receives three letters in the post that destroy his peace of mind more devastatingly than any bullet could.

I admired this intense but delicately written book for the beauty and heart-ache it carried in every line.
I admired it too for the vivid images it left me with:
a softly stooping women in a thistle-embroidered kimono;
a boat in flames against a glorious sky;
a brilliantly white but completely dried-up riverbed;
a heart-sore man as steely as the hunting gun he carries.

This short book full of paradox may be the highlight of my reading year. I doubt I'll read another before year's end that will come close.

[Helga چـو ایـران نباشد تن من مـباد · Rating 4 out of 5]

To love, to be loved- how sad such human doings are.

This is a book of confessions. Confessions of love, betrayal and guilt.
It all begins with a poem about hunting guns and ends with the reader being privy to the secrets of three women. Most of the book comprises of letters and the writing is a great example of the Japanese aesthetic reserve where intense emotions and high passions are described in simple and reserved words.

[Daniel Shindler · Rating 5 out of 5]

The title of this novella belies its introspective, contemplative heartbeat. The prose is willowy and piercing, gradually revealing a maze of complex passions and deferred desire. Imagery and feeling permeate the text. The eponymous hunting gun is both a framing device for unfolding a drama told in epistolary form and a framing image for the tension of hunting, although no shots are fired. Instead, the characters we meet are stalking the innermost complexities of human existence.

“The brightly polished hunting gun leaves the impact of its creeping weight on the middle aged man, on his solitary spirit, on his body, all while radiating an oddly bloody beauty of the sort you will never see when its sights are trained on a living thing.”

The hunter referenced is Misugi Josuke. He is the fulcrum of a three sided relationship laced with yearning, jealousy and simmering rage.He has been conducting a secret affair with his wife’s closest friend for the duration of his marriage. A series of three letters to the “ hunter’ reveals the complexities and consequences of this shadowed triangle. The letters are written to Misugi by his mistress’ daughter, by his wife and lastly, by his mistress. Each letter examines the same events .However, each account provides a different interpretation of these events. Three different voices are layered together. Each has a different tone and voices an array of deep seated regrets. When a new letter is read, the previous letter’s voice murmurs in an undertone, adding an element of uncertainty to understanding the triangle. Ultimately the letters present a multifaceted view of the hunter’s character and a glimpse at the chasms and complexities of the relationships between the three women. Their feelings sometimes intertwine and often clash. This duality results in a vortex of emotion that seethes beneath an outer shell of despairing quietude.

Much has been revealed, yet much is left to inference. Sounds are juxtaposed with ellipsis and silence. Actions mask sadness and inner turmoil. As the words and images cohere, whispers of regret, recrimination and sadness flit across the page. No violence has been done with a hunting gun; rather, havoc has been wreaked by the emotions within the human heart.

[JimZ · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a gem of a book!!!!! 🙂 🙃

It is a very short book…I would call it a novella… it has an interesting structure. The body of the book consists of 3 letters:
• One letter written by Shoko, daughter of a woman, Saiko, who had a 13-year affair with Shoko’s uncle—the letter is written to Uncle (Misugi) Josuke.
• Then a letter written by Midori, Saiko’s cousin, and Misugi Josuke’s wife, to Misugi Josuke, letting him know she knew about his 13-year affair with Saiko.
• Then a letter written by Saiko to Misugi Josuke, letting him know that their affair was known by Midori.
Also preceding the three letters was a letter written by Misugi Josuke to the narrator of this story.

If I made the three letters appear to be very confusing, please believe me they are not. I just wanted to list all the protagonists and their relationship to one another. Fascinating and complex and intertwined relationships. It was pitch-perfect writing. 🙂

And finally a wonderful afterword by the novella’s author, Yashushi Inoue, written in 1988, about 40 years after he wrote this in 1949. It was his first work of fiction, the other one being ‘Bullfight’ which won the Akutagawa Prize in 1950. He says in his Afterword in 1988 that since these first two works he has published 50 novels of varying lengths and 108 novellas!

He also says this:
• They say that, as the authors mature, they follow the trajectory charted by their first writings—a rule to which, it seems, there are no exceptions. If this is correct, then ‘The Hunting Gun’ and “Bullfight’ carry within them, alongside their youthful ungainliness, something fundamental from which I have never been able to break free. For this reason, I believe I am more fully present in their pages than in any of my other texts.
• Just as men are born under lucky or unlucky stars, so, too, literary works are more or blessed by fortune. Some arrive in the world perfectly formed; others are born sickly. Certain works achieve celebrity, while others languish in the shadows, condemned to huddle all their lives in an out of-the-way corner. Whether or not a work meets with success is to some extent a matter of caprice. Works the author approves of are ignored, and vice versa. The destinies of literary works are as fickle as those of men. Among the works I have published, some have had the good fortune to be much discussed, while others were forgotten almost as soon as they saw the light of day.

Sadly , only 10 of his works appear to have been translated into English: arggghhhhhhh 😟— https://www.japaneseliteratureinengli...

Happily it look like a number of them are available at this wonderful website, Open Library, including ‘The Hunting Gun’ (a different translated version than mine—mine is translated by Michael Emmerich): https://openlibrary.org/works/OL43152... whoo-hoo! 🙂 🙃

Brief bio on him from The New York Review of Books, https://www.nyrb.com/collections/yasu... :
Yasushi Inoue (1907-1991) was born on Hokkaidō, Japan’s northernmost island, the eldest child of an army medical officer. After a youth devoted to poetry and judo, Inoue sat, unsuccessfully, for the entrance exam to the Kyushu Imperial University Medical School. He would go on to study philosophy and literature at Kyoto Imperial University, writing his thesis on Paul Valéry. In 1935, newly married and with an infant daughter, Inoue became an arts reporter for the Osaka edition of the Mainichi News. Following the Second World War, during which he briefly served in north China, he published two short novels, The Hunting Gun and The Bullfight (winner of the Akutagawa Prize for literature). In 1951 Inoue resigned from the newspaper and devoted himself to literature, becoming a best-selling and tremendously prolific author in multiple genres. Among his books translated into English are The Hunting Gun, The Roof Tile of Tempyō, and The Blue Wolf: A Novel of the Life of Chinggis Khan. In 1976 the emperor of Japan presented Inoue with the Order of Culture, the highest honor granted for artistic merit in Japan.

Reviews:
• https://www.nytimes.com/2015/04/05/bo...
• https://jacquiwine.wordpress.com/2016...
• https://www.musicandliterature.org/re...
• https://tonysreadinglist.wordpress.co...

[Aprile · Rating 4 out of 5]

Così è stato, se vi pare
Non il tema dell'amore illecito, neppure il tema dell'amore coniugale e filiale tradito, e neppure la lieve penna di Yasushi Inoue o Inoue Yasushi, o la particolare struttura di questo breve romanzo mi hanno colpito come quanto la sensibilità e l'interesse dell'autore nel trattare il tema della dicotomia tra ciò che si ritiene siano o pensino o sappiano gli altri e ciò che in realtà ma con molta approssimazione sono, pensano e sanno, e lo sbigottimento che consegue alla rivelazione (quando avviene) dello stato delle cose. Ci si domanda come sia possibile non aver mai considerato le circostanze da un altro punto di vista, peccando quindi di ingenuità o di narcisismo. Tale sbigottimento l'avevo già provato - questa volta io, e non il personaggio del racconto - leggendo la seconda parte di "La donna giusta" di Sándor Márai.

[Heba · Rating 5 out of 5]

هذا النص هو بندقية صيد تقتنص مشاعر الوحدة وهى ترتجف تحت ثقل برودة الخداع...
لم أكن أعلم بأن يمكن للكلمات العذبة المرهفة القدرة على القسوة هكذا...!!
نص مُخادع يمنحك شعوراً بالهدوء بينما كل شيء يموج غضباً...
الرجل صاحب البندقية كان يبدو جافاً خاوياً ولكن كان مُتخماً بالوحدة تلقى ثلاث رسائل ، من زوجته التي تُحب وتنتظر أن تتلقى الحب ، وامرأة لا يمكنها تحمٌل معاناة أن تُحِب وكانت تسعى وراء سعادة أن تُحَب....، وكل منهما ظنت بأنها يمكن خداع الأخرى...، وابنة تكشف ذاك السر الذي لم يكن إلا مكشوفاً....
هذا النص مُثقل بالمشاعر وهى تنوء تحت ثقل البوح ، البوح المُخيف لشفافيته المُدمرة....
وأخيراً هل لو أنك استطعت أن تنفذ إلى الوحدة التي تكمن بداخل الرجل صاحب بندقية الصيد ، هل يمكنك من قراءة الثلاث رسائل أن تتعرف عليه حقاً...!!

[Lisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read the older 1961 translation of The Hunting Gun. The gift of this volume is the sheer delight of the print book, a slim volume with pages of thick, high quality paper which are a joy to touch and turn.

This is the tale (or is it?) of Josuke Misugi told through 3 farewell letters written to him: one from Shoko the daughter of his lover, one from his wife Midori, and one from his lover Saiko. I see the last 13 years unfold from the perspectives of these 3 women. Inoue captures their distinct voices in eloquent language. Each letter adds to what we know about all four of these characters and their situations.

Shoko, learning of the relationship by reading her mother's diary following her suicide, tries to make sense of it:

"I know from the affair between you and mother that there is a love that no one blesses and that no one should bless. Only you and mother know about the love between you--no one else does. . . . Up to the present time I believed that love was like the sun, bright and glorious, to be blessed forever by God and man. I believed that love grew gradually like a clear stream glittering beautifully in sunshine and making innumerable ripples in the wind and protected by its banks covered with grass, trees, and flowers. I believed that was love. How could I imagine a love unlighted by the sun, flowing from nowhere to nowhere and buried deep in the earth like an underground stream?"

Midori writes of knowing about the affair almost from the beginning, how it has affected her actions, and how she is now choosing to move on with her life.

"If I had gone down to the sea where you were, I would have found myself a different person today. But, luckily or unluckily, I didn't. Certainly that was the greatest turning point in my life. Why didn't I take the path to the sea? The reason is none other than this: I couldn't help feeling that to the beautiful woman five or six years older than I--that is, to cousin Saiko--I was far inferior in every respect. . . . Oh, that humility of mine! The humility of a new wife twenty years old that is expressible only in a pure curve of a painting. Perhaps you've had the experience, when you have jumped into the early autumn sea, of not daring to make a move because, if you did, the coldness of the water would be all the more sharp. In the same way I was afraid to make a move. It was long, long after that I made this bold decision: since you deceived me, I will deceive you too."

In her letter Saiko reveals feelings she has kept even from herself. She grapples with what is hidden and points to what may be hidden in the others.

"Once you said that each person has a snake in his body. . . . I often wondered to myself what each person's snake is, and sometimes I thought it was his egotism, sometimes his jealousy, sometimes his destiny. . . . Even now I don't know what it is, but certainly just as you said at that time, a snake has been living in me. That snake made its appearance today for the first time. That other self of mine I didn't even know--the one that can't be called by any name other than snake."

Saiko asks this poignant question which gets to the heart of this story:

"When at the end of their lives they lie quietly and turn their faces to the wall of death--the woman who can say she has tasted fully the happiness of being loved and the woman who can say that even though she was unhappy she has loved--to which one would God give the true, quiet rest? Yet, is there anyone on earth who can say before God that she has loved?"

I am greedy enough to want and blessed enough to have had both. And if I had to choose? . . .

Inoue carefully frames these letters with a poem, "Hunting Gun," in which the silent, cold, unfired gun seems to symbolize a lonely, middle-aged man. When some time after the receipt of these letters Josuke reads the poem, he sees himself in it and reaches out to the poet, looking for someone with whom to communicate and hoping for someone who will understand.

Publication 1949, Translation 1961

[Fabian · Rating 4 out of 5]

Every person carries a snake within them. This snake is the other self that lies dormant within us and only rarely reveals itself in special situations. “The Hunting Rifle” is about the love relationship between two women and a man in Japan in the middle of the last century. In three letters, we learn about the women's snakes and how they reveal themselves. We learn about failed lives that have resulted from conventional constraints and human coldness, and how feelings of happiness are nevertheless possible. 

In beautiful, quiet metaphors, Inoue reveals the inner lives of his characters: in a burning ship at sea, a white riverbed, the hunting rifle. Ultimately, it is also about the question of how long one can or should endure a dysfunctional relationship. It is about the curse and blessing of loneliness and a return to oneself: when one begins to accept one's feelings not as a crime but as a justified part of one's own self, one is already on the path to a new freedom.

[Nessrina Hazem · Rating 5 out of 5]

"أترغبين في أن تُحِبي، أم أن تُحَبي؟"

بناءًا على طلب صديقه، يكتب ياسوشي إينويه قصيدة في مجلة متعلقة بالصيد.. يصف فيها مشهد رؤيته لصياد وحيد.


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رجل بغليون بحارة كبير في فمه يسير ببطء برفقة كلبه صاعداً جبل أماغي.. سلاحه في هذا الصقيع بندقيته...
"بندقية صيد ذات لمعة مصقولة، تلقى بثقلها على جسد و روح رجل وحيد في منتصف العمر كأنها تتغلغل فيه."

تُرى هل صيادنا وحيد حقاً؟ هل وحدته إختيارية أم إجبارية؟ هل يستحق الشفقة و الرثاء لحاله؟

يتلقى ياسوشي رسالة من الصياد..و يعده الصياد بإرسال ثلاث رسائل من خلالها قد يتمكن ياسوشي من سبر أغوار الصياد.

رسائل جمعت بين العتاب و المصارحة و البوح و ربما الشماتة.
تكشف هذه الرسائل عن علاقة حب للصياد و  التي ظلت مخفية و تم الكشف عنها بعد وفاة حبيبته (سايكو).

اول رسالة من ابنة سايكو (شوكو) بعد قراءتها لمذكرات والدتها و معرفتها بعلاقتهم بدلاً من حرق المذكرات مع القش و نثرها كأوراق الأشجار اليابسة كما أرادت الام.
تصف فيها احساسها بالخداع ممزوجاً بحزنها على أمها . احساسها بالحزن على حب أمها .. أم صدمتها في مفهوم الحب من حب مشرق لحب يشبه مجري الصرف المغطي كما ذكرت.




"تُري هل تعلم يا عمي، بوجود لون اسمه" لون الحزن "، يختلف عن ألوان علبة الرسم التي تحتوي على ثلاثين لوناً مثل الأحمر و الأزرق و غيرهما من الألوان؟ بل إن لوح الحزن هذا تراه عيون البشر بوضوح."


ثاني رسالة للزوجة المخدوعة ميدوري. رسالة تصف فيها افتقدها للحب و بغضها لزوجها.. و مدى تعاستها مع زوج بارد. تعاستها لعدم قدرتها على أن تحبه و تكتب له رسائل غرامية.

" رجل غير مسلٍّ بالنسبة إلى النساء، رجل لا يفهم تعقيدات قلب المرأة، و على الأرجح لن تقع امرأة في هواه طوال حياته، و حتى وإن وقع هو في هواها. "

نكتشف بعدها من ميدوري انها كانت على علم بخيانته لها مع سايكو (ابنة عمها و صديقتها المقربة) . تكشف عن مشاعرها و صدمتها و اشمئزازها و تخاذلها أيضا.




".. وقفت على الرصيف أمام الفندق فترة من الوقت، و أنا أشبك ذراعَب و كأنني أعصر الآلام الحادة لصدري المحترق. ترددت قليلاً": أأنزل إلى البحر أم أذهب إلى المحطة؟ ثم بدأت النزول في اتجاه البحر، لكنني توقفت قبل أن أكمل خمسين مترًا. تسمرت في مكاني أحدق إلى نقطة واحدة من البحر ذي اللون الأزرق البروسي، المتألق في ذروة الشتاء.. غيرت رأيي، استدرت و أعطيت البحر ظهري، و بدأت أمشي في الاتجاه العكسي، في اتجاه طريق المحطة. و عند التفكير، فقد استمر هذا الطريق طويلاً، حتى أوصلني إلى وضعي الحالي. لو نزلت وقتها في الطريق إلى شاطئ البحر حيث كنتما، لاكتشفت على الأرجح "أنا" مختلفة عني اليوم. و لكنني، لحسن الحظ أو لسوئه لم أفعل. و عندما أفكر في ذلك الآن، أعتقد أنه كان أكبر مفترق طرق في حياتي كلها. "

واخرهم رسالة سايكو او وصية سايكو. رسالة جمعت مشاعر الحزن و الندم. تصف مفهوم التعلق من وجهة نظره

" إن الحب هو التعلق! لن أكون سيئاً إن تعلقت بكوب من الخزف، أليس كذلك؟ اذن لماذا اكون سيئاً إن تعلقت بكِ؟ "

و علاقتهم التي شاهدت سايكو مصيرها من البداية
متمثلة في مشهد القارب المحترق في عرض البحر.

تحكي و تبوح عن" أنا" أخرى مستترة داخلها." أنا" لم تعرفها من قبل، أنا نادمة، غيورة، خجلة و اثمة. تصف ندمها على هذه العلاقة، و تعترف بغيرتها على زوجها السابق، و شعورها بالخجل من ميدوري و الإثم الذي ارتكبته في حقها. و بغضها لهذا الحب الآثم.

بعد نهاية الثلاث رسائل يعلق الكاتب ياسوشي عليهم و على شخصية الصياد و يفهم سر وحدته و حزنه في مشهد الجبل المذكور في القصيدة.

اول قراءة لياسوشي إينويه و صادفت انها من نوعي المفضل من الروايات، رواية من روايات الرسائل منشأها اليابان و كل ما هو ياباني جميل و مرهف❤️

بالرغم من أنها رواية قديمة، إلا انها تصلح لكل زمان لكن مش لكل مكان :)
ببساطة لأن طبيعة اليابان الهادئة المرسومة في الرسائل توجد فقط في اليابان..
رواية تجمع بين رهافة الحس و الكتابة الأنيقة الشاعرية و وصف مختلف انواع المشاعر بإيجاز في ١٠٠ صفحة فقط.

الرواية صدرت عام ١٩٤٩ و تم ترجمتها للعربية و صدرت ترجمة جديدة للمترجم ميسرة عفيفى، مترجم مقتل الكومنداتور و الحقيقة الترجمة رائعة وحافظت على جمال المعنى.

[Angela M · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a beautifully translated story from Japanese. Introduced by a poet who who wrote a poem “The Hunting Gun” the story is comprised of three letters sent to him by the man who inspired his poem. The letters are to the man in the poem from his mistress’s daughter , his wife and his mistress. One of the most introspective epistolary novels , actually novella in length that I’ve read.
It reflects on love, adultery, desire, loneliness, the things we hide from each other and from ourselves. Complicated characters and complex relationships make for an intense and profound story.

[Alice · Rating 4 out of 5]

A little gem of a book. Intimate and beautifully written.

[E. G. · Rating 5 out of 5]

--The Hunting Gun

Afterword

[Anna Carina · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ein komplexes Zusammenspiel aus gesellschaftlichen Konventionen, Erwartungshaltungen und Normen.
Die Figuren agieren in restriktiv gebunden Strukturen, die ihnen wenig soziale Verhaltensspielräume gewähren. Vieles kann und darf nicht benannt werden. Die Kommunikation läuft zwangsweise, infolge der Unmöglichkeit einer gemeinsamen Bedeutungsbasis, in eine Sackgasse. Man hat schlicht für gewisse Situationen keinen passenden sozialen Code zur Verfügung.
Daraus resultierend erleben wir ein eindrückliches Schauspiel des Rückzugs, Einmauerns, Geheimnis Wahrens - eine Kälte der Einsamkeit, auf allen Seiten.
Zudem kommt es zu lauter Fehlinterpretationen, da die Figuren durch ihre Verschlossenheit vor dem Dilemma eines immensen Informationsmangels stehen, der eine riesige Blackbox in der Kommunikation darstellt, auf dessen Grundlage aber das eigene Handeln bestimmt wird.
Zu guter Letzt greift Inoue auch noch das Thema des Mutes und der Risikobereitschaft auf, die die meisten Menschen schmerzlich vermissen lassen und sich zum passiven Empfängertum entscheiden.
Wozu dies führt, erfahren wir in 3 Briefen, der Tochter der Geliebten, der Ehefrau des Mannes mit dem Jagdgewehr und am Ende der Geliebten selber.
Die Beziehungen erodieren zu funktionalen, strategischen Interaktionen, bis nur noch die Isolation übrig bleibt.

Die Symbolik, der sich Inoue bedient, wirkt hier und da etwas arg plakativ stereotyp.
Insbesondere der Brief der Gattin strotz vor dem Symbol des Phallus als Repräsentant der Macht, das den eigenen Mangel darstellt. Natürlich kommt man dann schnell zu dem Schluss das Gewehr auch als solches zu begreifen. Interessant ist dann aber wiederum wie er weiter damit verfährt. Er nutzt dieses Symbol, um subtil auf einen Zwischenzustand zu verweisen, der wiederum in den gesellschaftlichen Konventionen vertäut ist und die Gattin zwingt, durch diese zunächst seltsame Szene des Begehrens, sich zu verhalten. Die ganzen Fehlinterpretationen und unzulänglichen Kommunikationsmittel, die einen Schwebezustand auslösen, wirken letztendlich als Katalysator für eine Handlung von ihr.

Ja hier und da möchte ich mit den Augen rollen und dachte mir, „das hast du genauso schon hunderte Male in japanischer Literatur gelesen“. Aber! In der Gesamtkomposition ist das schon, insbesondere in Verbindung mit der Schlusspointe, ein ziemlich cooles, kleines Stück Literatur.

[Sara · Rating 4 out of 5]

This novella packs quite a punch. It is set out in a series of letters written to a man from the daughter of his mistress, his wife, and his mistress herself. It explores the deepest emotions we carry as human beings, those of our relationships to the people who we love, or are supposed to love. It is a complicated story of betrayal, of more than a sexual kind. Beautifully written and deeply moving.

Although I was not able to, this can be read in one sitting. Huge thank you to my friend, Lynn, for her marvelous review that brought this to my attention.

[Bogdan]

to F.


There's absence in all things, not only in bullets and letters.

One evening, the narrator contemplates the back of a hunter, fading away, slowly entering a forest as if there were nothing there:

Mu
無

The Japanese tend to regard adjectives as superfluous – seeing they distort the object and narrow the subject’s perspective.

The hunter is presented to the narrator in three letters, written by three different women – the hunter’s wife, his daughter, and his mistress. To paraphrase Tolstoy, he was good to all of them, yet made each unhappy in her own particular way. Each of the letters adds distance between the reader and the one who is being read.

見る (miru) means both to read and to see

a man is being read or seen going away into the woods, the rifle on his back

another man, unseen, goes into the letters

is alone

In Japanese, verbs are often impersonal, where he, she, it, they, we are either inferred by, or absent from the context. Thus,

is alone

Hitoridesu
一人です

[Laura · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was inspired to read The Hunting Gun, by Daniel's very favourable review - see here.

I think what is most important is the date the story was published, 1949 and it covers an earlier decade from 1930 to 40. It's a story of adultery, a man although married, is in love with another - and over a long period, from the mistress's perspective the affair lasts 13 years. The wife, Midori refers to a 10 year betrayal. And it is only after the death of Saiko, that Josuke, the man, receives three letters; from Shoko the daughter of Saiko; from his wife, Midori and the last one, posthumously from his mistress Saiko, who is both Shoko's mother and cousin to Midori.

I read the story in one sitting, it's only 80 pages, but it is beautifully constructed and written, with a framing story of our narrator writing a poem for a hunting magazine. He sees the hunter momentarily with his dog and pipe in a brief glimpse as he passes through the resort of Mount Amagi in Izu. He doesn't know the hunter but by a strange coincidence Josuke Misugi recognises himself in the writer's poem and sends a letter to him several months later. Josuke advises he will reveal his story, by forwarding the three letters written to him from the women.

There is nothing new in the pains that the betrayed and the betrayers feel. The lovers keep their liaison secret, but the wife, Midori in her turn conceals the fact that she has seen her husband and mistress together on several occasions. She knows all but decides to deceive, in her turn. It's an act of revenge, but naturally there are also consequences for her in this deceit.

What struck me, however, as I read is that although all four characters and the writer of the poem feel this is a personal and individual tragedy, it is not quite that. From my reading of Jun'ichiro Tanizaki's novels, in particular The Makioka Sisters, and The Key I've come to understand that Japan went through a period of intense social and economic change, especially after the 2nd World War. The country moves from a highly traditional family based value system to one that absorbed many values that may be understood as Western. And Inoue's book, as do many others of the time, reflect these immense changes.

The interesting connection with adultery and divorce was that these are both Western concepts. Marriage in the past was a life-time commitment and divorce unheard of. I won't comment on adultery, I can only assume there were many secret connections, but non of which would have demanded divorce as a solution. So, this story really represents a society moving dramatically from a social system based on tradition, honour and duty; to one where the individual becomes of paramount importance, and this in itself is a Western concept. This idea of personal fulfilment through exploring various options including sexual satisfaction was not part of the traditional Japanese ideology.

Inoue's novella reveals just how destructive these personal searches - for Freedom? are. They violently disrupt the traditional values of family and wealth inheritance. We see this quite distinctly in for example Midori's request of her husband, not simply for a divorce but a petition also for two of his houses, one to live in and the other to sell so that she can continue to live in the style to which she has been accustomed.

In a similar way Shoko also expresses her shock and disillusionment on discovering the affair between her mother Saiko and a man whom she has always looked up to. Her request in her letter is that she never have to see either Josuke or Midori ever again. She proposes to set herself up in business as a seamstress. We know her age which is twenty, but these details also reveal how women in Japan were seeking independence from the family system. In the past a woman's only duty was to her husband and to her sons - daughters always took a more marginal place.

Many of these details are present in Tanizaki's book - The Makioko Sisters, which also covers these decades of transition. The four sisters in that book demonstrate their efforts to either try and maintain the traditional system or in accepting the new possibilities, how they strive for independence and liberty from a system that always held then in abeyance to men.

The violence of these changes is also present in the steps that Saiko takes once the affair is discovered. She is riddled with the sense of sin and deception not simply of the people around her, but most importantly of herself. The ending of her life, is a reflection of how she is imbued with the traditional values; she regards the betrayal of her husband and her refusal to forgive him his affair as an evil and an unforgiveable sin on her part. She can barely understand how she has lived with herself these past thirteen years, but in the letter to her lover, Josuke she repeats over and over that the diary she has written about the affair contains her greatest happiness.

Inoue's story and his talent is in revealing how these individuals are literally torn asunder by their dramatic behaviours. I think Inoue fully understood that these are not simply individual stories but representations of a society itself. The tragedy lies in the fact that the individuals do not see how they are not alone in their struggles to accommodate these fundamental changes in social values. They lack perspective. They see themselves as victims of their own choices, but they are in fact tiny pawns in much larger waves of evolution.

I would like to end with a section from Midori's letter. This is the one I enjoyed the most because of its feisty and scathing accusations towards her husband. She loved, she loved him deeply and she is also deeply hurt by his betrayal and yet she comes across as a fighter and survivor and this I loved in her.

Well, all of these impudent chatterings will only increase your displeasure. So I'll get on to the main issue.
What do you think? When we look back, our marriage, which exists in name only, seems to have lasted a very long time. Don't you want to end it once and for all? Surely, it's a sad thing to do, but if you've no objections, let's each of us take the proper measure to gain his freedom.
Now that you're going to retire from active participation in various fields (it was quite contrary to what I expected when I saw your name among those of business men to be purged), I think this is the best chance you have of liquidating our unnatural connection too. I will make my request brief. I would be satisfied to have the villas at Takarazuka and Yase. The Yase residence is of proper size, and the surroundings suit my tastes, so even though I haven't gotten you to agree yet, I've been planning for some time to make it my home and to sell the house at Takarazuka for about two million yen, which I'll live on for the rest of my life. I should say that this is the last of my self-indulgences and the first and last of my extortions, since I've never presumed upon you before.

You can see from that little section just how outraged Midori is, but not defeated. As a western reader we inevitably admire her fighting back and her insistence upon her rights as Josuke's legally married wife. And yet, as we learn indirectly of Josuke's character, from the style of his letter writing, his retreat into solitary hunting, his silence around what he considers his wife's indiscretions, we learn, and we most certainly understand that it is those exact qualities in Midori that Josuke rejects and despises. He likes the traditional qualities in a woman, the suppliant and biddable Saiko, who bends to his desires; and his pursuit and insistence on the relationship. He likes her submission to him, something we can easily guess he finds lacking in Midori - and so here again, we see how different qualities within an individual are either given value or value is withheld depending upon the values in the social system. If you are a quite, contemplative, introspective bookish sort of person you will not do well in the cut-throat savagery that is required in a capitalist society.

[Maria · Rating 5 out of 5]

This short little book was very Zen: slow, clear and deliberate. The language is simple, but powerful. It's a family drama, described after it's all over, in letter form. Most of all it's a character study. It keeps your attention easily, and yet it's so quiet and unassuming.

In the frame narrative, a poet who had a hunting themed poem published, are contacted by a man he does not know, who was deeply moved by the poem. He claims the poem describes him to a tee, and that the poet must have known about his situation. Then he sends three letters he has received from different female family members, and so we get to see their family from three different viewpoints.

Yes, there are strong emotions and secrets revealed, and there is anger, but most of all it is slow and contemplative. To write quietly about strong emotions can create a lot of distance, but that was not my experience this time. The lack of strong, flowery language brings us closer, not further away. And it's wonderful when you find a book that is so powerful and so comfortable to read at the same time.

[Hristina · Rating 4 out of 5]

4,5
Singurul motiv pentru care nu-i dau 5 stele este tonul artificial prezent pe alocuri, oarecum de asteptat in literatura japoneză clasică. In rest este impecabil. Atat de micuț ca întindere dar atât de bine construit, o mica bijuterie acest text. L-am găsit plin de sens, de o tristețe melancolică, dar și capabil să surprindă. Cele patru scrisori se desfac fiecare ca niște capcane imbatabile pentru cele precedente, iar tu, ca cititor, intri într-o încăpere total neașteptată cu fiecare epistolă, care o redefineste pe cea de dinainte. Mi-a placut mai mult decât mă așteptam si este meritul lui ca mi-a indus exact starea necesară pentru a-l savura.

[Tony · Rating 5 out of 5]

This has a wonderful kind of prologue, which I read again and again as I was reading this slim book. The author, as character, when he was a mere promising one, was asked by a friend to write a poem for a hunting magazine. The author was no hunter, but he appreciated the gesture. So he wrote a two paragraph prose poem. I thought it very good, but even the author doubted the subscribing hunters would appreciate it. It told about the author hiking on a mountain and crossing another man, with a double barrel shotgun resting on his shoulder. There was something about the man that made the author feel the hunter was not on the mountain, but rather on a desolate, dried-up riverbed.

The poem was ignored by the subscribers. But then the author received a letter from a man who would be the hunter. It was him, surely. I have three letters, the hunter wrote. I am sending them separately.

The first letter is from his niece, who has unraveled things. The second is from the hunter's wife, who also unraveled things. The third, posthumously, is from the niece's mom, who was the hunter's lover.

I hope to carefully tread any more plot than I already have. And I'll skip the niece's letter. The wife's letter, Midori's, was more poignant. She had her flings too. But it was she who would say goodbye:

How extraordinarily difficult it is to write a goodbye letter. It is unpleasant to get all weepy, but it is also unpleasant to be overly brisk. I would like for us to make a clean break and to go our separate ways without hurting each other, but a peculiar sort of posturing seems to have found the way into my prose. Perhaps there is no helping it: a goodbye letter is what it is, and it will not be a thing of beauty, no matter who the author is. I suppose I might as well write in a cold and prickly style appropriate to the content. Forgive me, then, for returning your enduring coldness by writing the sort of unabashedly disagreeable letter that will make you turn still colder.

Shiver.

The lover, who writes the third letter, is dying, and thus has a special perspective. She remembers one night, at a hotel. The hunter opened the storm shutters.

When you pushed it open around midnight . . . there was a fishing boat far out at sea that had caught fire and was burning high, bright red, like a cresset. People might be dying out there, we could see that, and yet the horror of it didn't touch us . . . I felt as if I had glimpsed, in that boat blazing on the water, unbeknownst to anyone, the fate of our hopeless love. Even as I write this, that scene, those flames bright enough to overcome the darkness, rise up before me. What I saw on the ocean that night was without a doubt a figure, the perfect figure, of the distress, the fleeting, this-worldly writhing that is a woman's life.

So, a young woman's discovery, a wife's calculus, a lover's fate . . . and a man hiking, alone, on what must be a dried riverbed.

[Laubythesea · Rating 4 out of 5]

Poco se ve por aquí este libro y no me lo explico porque es una maravilla. Yo lo he leído fácil tres veces y aunque evidentemente, después de volver a él varias veces, recuerdo la trama y ni siquiera me importa porque es una historia de esas a las que vuelves por el placer de leerla, de la que siempre saco cosas nuevas, detalles de los que no me había percatado y reflexiones diferentes.
 
‘La escopeta de caza’ del escritor japonés Yasushi Inoue se publicó en 1948 y ganó el prestigioso premio Akutagawa, que se otorga a historias cortas y a autores nóveles o poco conocidos. Así, es uno de esos libros que se puede leer de una sentada si quieres, pero reconozco que mi consejo es ir con calma, saboreando cada página.
 
La historia que nos plantea en inicio es muy curiosa, un poeta nos cuenta que para hacer un favor a un amigo ha publicado un haiku en una revista de caza, sin tener él particular interés en el tema. A raíz de ello, de forma absolutamente inesperada recibe una misiva de un misterioso hombre, que, utilizando nombre falso (Josuke), le dice que está seguro que el poema habla de él, y le pide que lea tres cartas que le envía y luego las queme. Así, la mayor parte de la novela será la ‘transcripción’ de estas tres cartas que dirigidas a Josuke y que ahora recibe el lector.
 
Es muy curioso porque las cuatro cartas que conforman la novela, la de Josuke y las tres que recibe, son unidireccionales, no esperan respuesta (en su contenido entenderemos el porqué). Todas ellas abordarán sucesos relacionados, aportándonos perspectivas de diferentes mujeres y detalles desconocidos hasta el momento para ir conformando un puzles de una alta intensidad emocional, eso si, contado con la aparente frialdad que caracteriza a la sociedad japonesa cuando llega el momento de hablar de los sentimientos propios. Vais a disculpadme que no entre más en la trama y ni os adelante quienes son esas mujeres, pero, al ser un libro tan corto… os restaría magia por lo que opto por mencionar mejor otros detalles.
 
Como que es una novela llena de silencios, de emociones contenidas, que ‘envenenan’ a quienes lo hacen y que encuentran en la escritura de las cartas su propia catarsis. Un libro que fascinará a quien le guste realizar lecturas atentas, buscando explicación a cada detalle y con ojo ávido ante los simbolismos ciertos elementos recurrentes como la serpiente, la escopeta de caza y los colores con los que los personajes se visten (nada es casual, ya os aviso).
 
Preparaos para una historia de amor y traiciones, de secretos que salen a la luz, de mentiras piadosas y no tanto, con personajes heridos a diferentes niveles… vamos una historia digna de ser calificada de tragedia griega (sin serlo), con una intensidad pasiva como solo un autor japonés puede hacer y con unos temas absolutamente universales y atemporales.
 
Novelón (corto) a leer si o sí.

[Ernst · Rating 4 out of 5]

Das war mein erster Inoue, der mir so gut gefallen hat, dass ich zeitnahe noch 2 weitere seiner Romane gelesen habe, Stierkampf und schwarze Flut.

[Nick Grammos · Rating 4 out of 5]

Brief tale of love as
the smoking gun in four lives
plus one bystander

[Mariel · Rating 4 out of 5]

I don't know how to read. I'm going to sign up for hooked on phonics after I write this review. My mind was in the gutter like I lost to Jesus Quintana and his purple balls in a bowling match (we have dates on wednesdays and saturdays now). My first reading today (I'm not a freak! This story is only 74 pages) the relationship was between a son and his mother. In my defense, kind jury (I really like those shoes! They match your understanding eyes), extramarital affairs aren't that shocking, are they? It SHOULDN'T have been considering how many are like shadows of a table that's always there in the corner. The table might knock into some shins on the way out but it's still kinda facts of life always there. It isn't anyone here's first time into the table. Don't be so hard on Mariel, Mariel! The Hunting Gun is kinda great and giving a shit about the affairs is going back to the abcs and birds and the bees. It should have been incest. The sin, sin, sin was overshadowing the points that splinter and all the kings men can't kiss the boo boo away. Soooo close to a treasure (hey, I did read it twice in one day). So what if the hypocrisy of the drama of the sin was distracting. Something else was there under the should bes and spelling bees of what people want defined. The fault is not mine. I know how to sound out the meanings between the lines, if you catch my phonetical hook. It's knowing what is real that gets me. The rifle is pointed at me now. Fire! Duck! (Go on without me! Tell...Yasushi Inoue...I...like...him! Take this last goodreads review home....dies...)

It's feeling the desire (I guess that's a reason to get out of bed in the morning desire) to feel the real you with other people that you feel when you're alone. It's pretty special that this little book had that ache to get to feel yourself when you're alone with yourself. I had that when reading this. What's the kind of loneliness you can't warm your fingers by the fire? The feeling of being me with someone else? What do I want more? (I think it's important to me to feel me with me and at least a hope of feeling me with someone else.) The Hunting Gun (the poem within the book) is a poem of poetic justice. The kind that wants to take the place of who it wonders about. Walk with me, shoot me and I'll shoot you. The hunter the poet wondered about writes to him to stand as a bulls eye target. Between the eyes kind of being seen. Josuke sends his three letters from three different women. The him that is himself and not himself with other people. (I liked that the poet looked to Josuke's handwriting for his impression of him, like how handwriting can be a clue. It'd be interesting to study that like it's another kind of body language. It's a shame that typing has hidden that behind too much clothes, or lipstick painting a frown upside down. I liked that he watched his big back for what he might be. Looking for clues is taking action. The trying to understand is when you get to feel yourself when you're not alone.) Seeing yourself in someone else's eyes and you weren't there in the memory because you don't recognize you. If you had a gun you might shoot that outside you. That's not me! (Or is that a time travel worst case scenario? I stepped on a snake in 1944 and now everyone is a snake in 2011!)

Shoko is the daughter of Josuke's lover. I had thought she was his sister because she's the kind of girl that would adopt the baby or sister role with whomever she was with. Their secret was not hers, should not have been hers, and she stole it by snooping through her mother's diary. Why did she write Josuke a get out of my life letter other than to make something belong to her? I did like this part of her letter: "I had the impression that mother's own time had been moving through the house the moment I had left it to go to school. I felt that if I went in, mother would be embarrassed, and her face would become sad." It was telling that she thought the feeling a bad omen, not that her mother should turn without her. It's a cruel feeling to not be one's own.

Midori, the wife, keeps flowers pinned and arranged. Her letters are a he-loves-me-not convincing variety of what can look almost real in some light or another. Her rut is trapped in waiting for someone else to make the move, until she makes a move of a step away. It's not a moving move that means anything to leave. What she would see in the back shape and hand writing on the wall would be something to fit what she wanted to see. How lonely...

The tragedy is living a deliberate lie for the sake of other liars. I didn't care about the LOVE because it wasn't love. Is it better to love or be loved? The loved, not a lover, is Saiko. She cannot believe in the true self that is loving. If that's the case how could she have been happy believing that she was loved? Her husband had cheated on her and she could not get over it to forgive him or have anything that didn't bear the taint of that failure of her should bes. It was an incest feeling, that having children so someone will love you. Is confessing a fear once unshared not being yourself? Are you not yourself unless you're asleep and your unconcious is free to roam around and visit other parts that only come out at night to play? (I must be myself a lot because I'm a day dreamer and a nightmarer.) Saiko didn't feel she was being herself until before her death in that last letter she wrote to Josuke. It must have been lonely for Josuke to be so unseen and uncredited seer. I love this book because he's unseen by the position of holding his own gun. He was supposed to aim and fire. When wanting to be seen by the poet it is not his own words he sends but those of the women. Aim and fire... How is he going to be less lonely when he must want to find some kind of himself to feel in their company?

I thought The Hunting Gun was special for making me feel it is important that somebody take a second look at Josuke and not know what they are going to see before they look. What do you expect to see before you look at yourself? Fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiire! (I hope I know how to read...) I thought it was special for making me feel me because I wanted to look at them.

[George K. · Rating 4 out of 5]

Καλογραμμένη δραματική νουβέλα, που μιλάει για τον παράνομο έρωτα και τις συνταρακτικές συνέπειες στη ζωή τριών γυναικών που με τον έναν ή τον άλλο τρόπο είχαν κάποιο ρόλο. Ουσιαστικά έχουμε τρία διαφορετικά γράμματα τριών διαφορετικών γυναικών, που βγάζουν στη φόρα τα συναισθήματά τους σχετικά με τον παράνομο αυτό έρωτα, συναισθήματα όπως είναι ο θυμός, η πίκρα, οι ενοχές... Είναι μια νουβέλα χαμηλών τόνων που δείχνει λιγάκι τα χρόνια της, όμως ασχολείται μ'ένα διαχρονι��ό θέμα και έχει τη δύναμη να περάσει κάποια μηνύματα στους αναγνώστες.

[Ginny_1807 · Rating 5 out of 5]

Capolavoro
Quale sarà il serpente che ognuno degli uomini si porta dentro? Egoismo, gelosia, fatalità? Forse una specie di karma che ingoia tutto ciò e che la nostra forza non ci basta a mutare?

È un intreccio amoroso, aggrovigliato e crudele, il legame che avvince i destini dei protagonisti di questo piccolo, intenso romanzo: un uomo e tre donne, in reciproca relazione di affetti e consuetudini quotidiane.
Sarebbe tuttavia estremamente riduttivo affermare che sia l’amore l’unico tema del racconto, perché in esso, a ben guardare, è racchiusa una sorta di distillato della natura umana, indagata in particolare nel suo modo di manifestarsi nei rapporti interpersonali. Matrimonio, adulterio, amicizia, amore filiale: nulla è come appare; e nella tensione sinuosa di una prosa vivida ed essenziale come il linguaggio poetico, poco a poco si svelano sospetti, equivoci e segreti.

È presente in ciascuno di noi una zona oscura – celata al mondo intero e insidiosa come un infido serpente – spesso ignota perfino a noi stessi, che erompe inattesa e imprevedibile quando scatta la molla del destino e ci si trova a fare i conti con la necessità di scegliere.
E allora tutti i principi, i progetti e i propositi che avevamo fatto nostri con il buonsenso e la razionalità crollano miserevolmente, per cedere il passo a una istintività che non disdegna neppure la menzogna, l’inganno e il rifiuto nei confronti di chi ci ama e di tutto ciò che credevamo ci fosse più caro; e talora della vita stessa.
C’è anche in ciascuno di noi una misteriosa vocazione alla solitudine, subìta o voluta; una istintiva crudeltà sanguinaria, dolorosa per noi stessi e al contempo incurante delle ferite che può infliggere ad altri; un “fucile da caccia” che ci preme perennemente al fianco, “scavando nel nostro spirito solitario, nella nostra carne solitaria”, mentre procediamo in cerca di prede nella desolazione del “bianco alveo di un fiume”.

Un libro straordinario, che mi è particolarmente caro.
Un gioiello di perfezione stilistica e strutturale. Un piccolo grande capolavoro, da leggere e rileggere, perché ad ogni rilettura dischiude nuove interpretazioni del significante, inducendo a riflessioni volte anche ad una più profonda conoscenza di sé stessi.

[Sarah ~ · Rating 5 out of 5]

بندقية صيد - ياسوشي اينوي

"أوجهٌ عدّة لولهٍ مستحيل "
قصة فريدة تروى بشكل بديع وسلس وشاعري .

[Gerhard · Rating 4 out of 5]

Aus Verlegenheit wird ein Gedicht geschrieben und in einer Jägerzeitung veröffentlicht. Da sich ein Jäger angesprochen fühlt, das Gedicht ihn auch bewegt, schreibt er dies dem Autor. Er erzählt von sich und schickt ihm drei Abschiedsbriefe von Frauen, die sein Leben bestimmt haben. Eine kleine melancholische Geschichte, für mich sehr lesenswert.

[Dimitri · Rating 3 out of 5]

Amare, essere amato … come sono tristi le azioni umane. Quando ero al secondo o al terzo anno del liceo femminile, durante un esame di inglese vennero fuori alcune domande sulla forma attiva e passiva dei verbi. Colpire, essere colpito; guardare, essere guardato … mischiati tra tanti verbi come questi, ce n’erano due che emanavano una luce speciale: amare, essere amato. Mentre guardavamo con attenzione le domande leccando le matite, a un certo punto da dietro le spalle mi arrivò un bigliettino, che qualcuno aveva fatto girare per gioco. Guardai, c’erano scritte due domande: “Vuoi amare?”, “Vuoi essere amata?”. E sotto la frase “Vuoi essere amata?”, scritti con l’inchiostro o con la matita blu e rossa, c’erano molti cerchietti, mentre nella colonna del “Vuoi amare?” non c’era nemmeno il più piccolo segno di adesione. Anch’io non feci eccezione e aggiunsi il mio cerchietto sotto “Vuoi essere amata?”. Perfino le ragazze di sedici, diciassette anni, che capiscono ben poco di cosa quelle parole “amare”, “essere amato” possano significare, intuiscono già per istinto che la felicità sta nel fatto di essere amate.
Solo la ragazza seduta accanto a me, quando le passai il biglietto, vi diede una rapida occhiata e subito, a colpo sicuro, con un deciso tratto di matita tracciò un grande cerchio nella colonna ignorata da tutte le altre. Lei voleva amare. Ricordo ancora chiaramente che provai allo stesso tempo antipatia per quella compagna priva di mezze misure, e disorientamento per essere stata colta di sorpresa. La ragazza era un tipo insignificante, dall’aria malinconica, e i suoi voti non erano particolarmente alti. Non ho idea di come sarà diventata da grande quella ragazza dai capelli un po’ rossastri, sempre sola, ma chissà perché, dopo più di vent’anni, mentre scrivo questa lettera, i lineamenti del suo viso mi tornano chiari alla mente.