Idols of a Mother’s Heart

by Christina Fox

Even good things can become idols if we give them central importance in our lives. Having children changes everything, and as mothers, we risk looking for life, purpose and meaning in motherhood. While being a mother brings its unique set of challenges, these years of raising children and helping them grow in the nurture and admonition of the Lord provide an opportunity to grow in our own Christlikeness as well.

Writing from her own personal experience as a mom, Christina Fox encourages mothers to prayerfully and thoughtfully examine their own hearts, and to let God use motherhood as a means of sanctification.

Split into three sections, the first chapter looks at the meaning motherhood; chapters 2–4 are about idolatry; chapters 5–9 focus on a few different idols that mothers might worship (not an exhaustive list, but a common few); and the final chapters are about facing idols, dethroning them, and turning our heart back to the One true God.

Chapter titles include:

Part I

1. The Sanctifying Work of Motherhood

2. Made for Worship

3. What is Idolatry?

4. Identifying Idols in Our Lives

Part II

5. The Idol of Children

6. The Idol of Achievement and Success

7. The Idol of Comfort

8. The Idol of Control

9. The Idol of Approval

Part III

10. Turning from Our Idols

11. Turning to Christ

Genres: Parenting, Nonfiction, Faith, Christian Living, Christian

192 pages, Paperback

First published December 1, 2018

About the author

Christina Fox is a blogger at where she chronicles her faith journey. She writes for a number of Christian ministries and publications including Desiring God and The Gospel Coalition. She lives with her husband and two sons in sunny South Florida.

Reviews

[Kelly · Rating 4 out of 5]

Surprisingly good. This would make for a great discussion group, especially for a mom's group although the content could be applied to both moms and non-moms. For the reasons below, I'd pick this book for a group study instead of other books targeted at the same demographic (books for women/moms that are pretty easy reads - think authors like Rachel Hollis, Jess Connolly, etc.)

Writing style was direct, with LOTS of Scripture (both summaries and quotations) from an actual real translation of the Bible (no The Message or other paraphrase Bibles quoted! A nice deviation from the norm for books targeted at women/moms) and quotations from both modern and older works (Keller, Packer, Lewis, Westminster Shorter Catechism, Heidelberg Catechism, etc.), and no excessive personal story-telling.

The content is Biblical and respectful of theology, but not in a noticeably denominational way (Fox's denomination is PCA). I appreciate how Fox summarizes or quotes Scripture for readers who might not be well-versed in the Bible (newer Christians, Christians who don't read/study much...) and also uses actual theological terms (sanctification, regeneration, repentance, etc.) - again, a refreshing change compared to most books for this demographic. By the end, I felt I had been convicted personally and could give this to either a brand new Christian (where the content would be new and expressed very clearly) or to a life-long Christian (where the content would be a great reminder).

The content/topic of the book isn't really original, but it is at least a Biblical topic nicely rehashed for the book's target demographic. Discussion questions and prayers included at the end of each chapter would be helpful for a personal or group study and actually lent themselves to deeper reflection than many books of a similar type.

[Renee Masterson Young · Rating 5 out of 5]

Motherhood has plenty of challenges, but all trials are exacerbated when a mother takes her eyes off Christ and fashions for herself lesser gods, perhaps unawares. Christina Fox walks through several areas where a mother is tempted to erect an idol in her heart: children, success, comfort, control, and approval.

“Being a mom reveals in a unique way the true nature of our heart. And like the dirty diapers we change each day, it isn’t pretty” (25).

Any mother who is honest with herself will resonate deeply with this book and be not only seriously convicted, but also tenderly cared for and encouraged. This book is like a warm hug after necessary tough love from a mentor walking beside you as you stumble through the woes and willies of motherhood. Fox centers her writing on the Bible, and I appreciate her inclusion of God’s word over her own. The author reminds us that throughout motherhood God “is using every situation in your life to change and transform you” (94) and that while we crawl on the road of struggle and suffering “we need to focus on hearts on who God is and what He has done for us in Christ” (173). And oh how much easier said that is, than done.

I am so thankful for Christina Fox’s wisdom and how Christ-centered and hopeful this book is. I needed it personally: the cool conviction; the gospel hope; the undeserved kindness and gentleness; to be reminded of the goodness of God.

This book goes promptly on my “Essential Reads for Mothers” list.

[Laura · Rating 4 out of 5]

If you’re an overwhelmed mom, Christina Fox gets what you’re going through.

“Unlike hard and difficult jobs I’ve had before, motherhood is all consuming. It consumes energy, time, emotion, wisdom, and everything else…. It reveals our insufficiencies. It shows us just much we don’t know and how incapable we really are. And, it seems to spotlight sin in our heart, magnifying it so what we see the depths of our sin in ways we’ve never noticed before.”
It can refreshing enough for a young mom to feel like she is not alone. We stepped into this role with optimism but pretty soon we’ve figured out nothing is quite going according to our plan. What happens next, as we begin to reconcile our hopes for motherhood with the reality of its challenges, reveals a lot about the state of our hearts. But Christina Fox offers more than just solidarity. In her book Idols of a Mother’s Heart, Fox acknowledges the challenges of motherhood not just to offer us solidarity but also in order to help us understand our hearts. She reminds Christian moms what their hearts were made to worship and what they may have been worshipping instead.

Fox unpacks the concept of idolatry in Part 1 of her Idols of a Mother’s Heart. If you’re familiar with Tim Keller’s reconceptualization of idolatry for modern believers, you’ll find much of this section to be a rehashing of old ideas. Unfortunately, there isn’t much in this section that is specifically aimed at mothers.

This would be a great read for a MOPS-like group to use as the content of their meetings. My only fear is that women may get bogged down by the first section, which hardly references motherhood at all, and will never get to the really rich insights of Part 2. In Part 1 she hints that “we often worship God plus something else” but it isn’t until I got to chapters like “The Idol of Achievement and Success” and “The Idol of Comfort” and “The Idol of Control” that I began to truly see myself as an idol worshipper.

Her diagnostic test at the end of Part 1 offers mothers a chance to ponder their own hearts for symptoms of idolatry. For example, she asks us to consider whether we are tempted to self-pity, reminding us that “the more idolatrous our hearts are, the more we will have self-pity. We feel sorry for ourselves because of some trial, hardship, or injustice and we seek out others who will agree with us, feel sorry for us, and perhaps even intervene on our behalf.” This was one of the first places where I started feeling that familiar discomfort of conviction. (In other words, guilty as charged!)

I felt similarly convicted throughout the rest of Part 2. I was frequently marking pages that I need to meditate on and bring up in my prayers of repentance. How easy I find myself turning to false hopes as a parent. I look to my child’s achievement as a “method of measurement” to assure me I’m doing a good job or as the evidence to support my self-pitying conclusion that I’m failing as a mother. I turn to the comforts of my digital life or my books to help me escape or numb myself to the reality of difficult parenting decisions. Fox knows from experience, I’m guessing, how tempting it is to believe the idol of comfort which tells me that I “have a right to pleasure and comfort” and so I can “start to resent those who interfere” (namely, my precious children.)

Fox came alongside me and helped me to be honest about some of the emotions I’d been experiencing as a mom. Rather than just dealing with the symptoms like so many books for moms, Fox diagnoses the idolatries that are the root causes. But she does so with the sympathy of a mom who has been there, and she leaves you with a final chapter on turning to Christ that restored my heart to worship.

[Sarah · Rating 3 out of 5]

I had a hard time deciding how to rate this one. Technically, it's theologically solid, and there were some good insights and reminders scattered throughout that encouraged me. It was refreshing to see a right understanding of sanctification that encourages moms to keep "putting off" sin and "putting on" Christ. Somehow it all still fell a little flat for me in the end. It was an ok study of idolatry generally, but I felt like it could have been a lot more specific in regards to the particular temptations of mothers. It also bugged me that there were SO many Tim Keller quotes, which probably influenced my final opinion of the book a lot now that I think about it. I'm glad I read it, but I just don't think it's going to be a particularly memorable one for me.

[Hannah Schnetz · Rating 5 out of 5]

Extremely helpful, straightforward, challenging, and encouraging. This book is the first motherhood book I read after becoming a parent and it spoke to every single struggle I had in a wonderfully practical way. Heartfelt and straight shooting, this is one I could easily recommend to any mother!

[Elizabeth Prata · Rating 2 out of 5]

Well intended, but superficial, emotional, low on scripture. I quit reading when the author quoted Elyse Fitzpatrick but misspelled her name Elise. I made it to page 78

[Julia Burford · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is such an excellent book! Easy to read and accessible for all, but just so wonderful in the way it directs you to God so you can become more like Him. And it's not just narrowly directed into making you a better mother, but a better worshipper of God who can find life in Christ alone ❤️

[Korey · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is well written, has solid theology, and is a good reminder to keep our eyes fixed on Jesus. I will admit the amount of quotes from other others felt a little disjointed (I'd rather there just be footnotes and paraphrasing) but over all I thought it was a good read.

[Betsy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Love how saturated with Scripture Christina Fox's books are. This one minces no words and was very convicting for me. The format of the book really lends itself to small group study.

[Kristy Hetzel · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thought-provoking. I think it's biggest strength would be in being used for a Bible study/book club or personal study, digging in properly with the questions at the end of each chapter.

[Anna Molder · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent read. Written in an accessible way and filled with lots of scripture.

[Deon · Rating 4 out of 5]

Excellent book for mommas!

I read this on #KindleUnlimited

[Sara Hollar · Rating 4 out of 5]

Convicting, solid read. Good reminders and questions to ask. Great to discuss as a group. It's a little repetitive and she quotes a lot of others. It's a short book, but could be as effective if it were even shorter.

[Emily · Rating 5 out of 5]

Idols of a Mother’s Heart provides a thought-provoking journey as to what motivates our actions, what dominates our thoughts, and what acts as a roadblock to worship. If we don’t worship God, we will find another idol to take His place. Fox identifies common idols for mothers and explains how to turn from one’s idols and towards Christ. I appreciate that this book doesn’t leave one feeling defeated but rather empowered to identify and conquer the things that keep her from fully worshipping our one true God. This book is rooted in Scripture and a must-read for moms!

I received an advance reader copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

[Elizabeth · Rating 4 out of 5]

"It had been one of those 'terrible, horrible, no good, very bad days.' The kind where nothing went the way it should. I must have corrected the kids every five minutes. I refereed fights, cleaned up mess after mess, repeated instructions, and tried to create order out of chaos. I was exhausted, irritated, and impatient.

Sitting at the dinner table that evening, it was my oldest son's turn to give thanks. When I heard him say, 'And God, could you please help mommy to be patient with us?' I realized I wasn't the only one affected by our difficult day. I was part of the problem" (24).

"Before I had children, I considered myself a patient person." Who can't relate to that? Motherhood is hard. Seeing our sinfulness exposed is harder. Applying the good news about Christ's life, death, and resurrection to our lives is glorious! Christina is a wise and relate-able companion for the journey.

In Idols of a Mother's Heart, Christina Fox begins by laying a strong, Gospel foundation which remains central throughout the book. She writes about how we were created to glorify, enjoy, worship, and image God and about how things went terribly wrong. She follows Tim Keller in defining an idol as:

"...anything more important to you than God, anything that absorbs your heart and imagination more than God, anything you seek to give you what only God can give. A counterfeit god is anything so central and essential to your life that, should you lose it, your life would hardly feel worth living. An idol has such a controlling position in your heart that you can spend most of your passion and energy, your emotional and financial resources, on it without a second thought" (Tim Keller as quoted by Christina Fox, pg. 56).

Christina then moves to help her readers identify and dethrone idols. To this end, she offers heart-probing diagnostic questions and reminds us that idols fail again and again and again to deliver on the promise of ultimate happiness, pointing us to Christ who is all-satisfying.

"As much as we seek happiness in the idols we pursue, they can never give us the joy we find with Christ...the infinite abyss can only be filled by an infinite and immutable object, that is to say, only by God Himself" (78).

While I am aware of several other books on this subject, many of them cater to a male audience and/or perspective and focus on idols like sex, money, and power. Christina has thoughtfully applied the same truths found in those excellent books to the area of motherhood, specifically addressing the common idols of: children, achievement and success, comfort, control, and approval. Idols of a Mother's Heart is a welcome addition to other works on this subject!

Idols of a Mother's Heart is a Scripture saturated book that is full of sound doctrine. Each chapter closes with rich prayers, insightful questions, and Scriptures for further study and reflection. I love that Christina is humble, real, and transparent with her readers. Idols of a Mother's Heart is a useful book to encourage us daily so that we might not be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin. It is my joy to commend it to you!

**Many thanks to Christian Fox for sending me a complimentary copy of this book!! These are my honest thoughts!

[Amy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Motherhood is hard- so very, very hard. Expectations from others as well as expectation from ourselves keep us looking for the secrets that will make us successful at mothering. Whether its how well our children behave or how we can juggle everything in our life, anything that makes us successful is pursued. Often times they become the identity we seek and the hope we set our gaze on as we mother. And, as Christina Fox shares, they often take the place God desires in our hearts as we serve Him in our mothering. In this book, Christina draws our attention to the things we often live for in our parenting instead of living for the glory of God. Even as she makes us aware of these idols, she is faithful to draw our attention to the goodness of the gospel, the work of Christ on behalf of us idolatrous mothers. While it can be painful to become aware of the idols in our lives as is done in this book, seeing the beauty of Jesus and the goodness of the gospel draws the reader closer to Jesus as she seeks to rid her life of those idols and live for the glory of God alone. I so appreciate the encouragement I received from this book. It helped me see where I place idols in my life as I mother my children and the hope found in Jesus as I seek to live for Him alone. I hightly recommend this excellent book.
This book was given to me by the publisher for my honest review.

[Kathy Schierer · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is for all moms - whether you’re a new mom or a seasoned mom. This book beautifully lays out God’s design for motherhood, how sin and idolatry enters into motherhood, and how it all is part of your sanctification. In reading through five idols that we can construct as mothers, I felt both convicted and encouraged. The book wraps up by encouraging you to turn away from your idols and toward God. He is always with you and gives you strength for your role as a mother.

This book provides a lot of scripture to meditate on and leads you to both examine your heart and dig deeper into the “what and why” of the idols you have created as a mother. The end of each chapter also provides insightful questions to dig deeper and a prayer to help you turn to God in your role as a mother.

[Lindsay · Rating 5 out of 5]

A quick read but chock full of gospel truth. It is the perfect length for a busy mom who feels overwhelmed by large books. My fear going into any book titled about idols or sin is that it will turn into a legalistic, formulaic book, but not this book.

She points out first we turn from our idols by 1. Having heart awareness and relaxing 2. Removing idols through confession and repentance 3. Guarding the heart by being in God’s Word, worship 4. Realizing it is an ongoing battle until we are at home with Jesus.

My favorite part of the book was the reminder to replace idols with the only one who can truly satisfy—Jesus. It is overflowing with truth of who Jesus is and a call to respond on worship.

[Angela · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thoughtful & Convicting

Christina Fox has written a gosepl-focused, Scripture-laden study of idols that moms, in particular, are prone to cherish over the Lord. I think this book would be helpful to someone who has never considered idols of the heart, as well as someone who has studied the topic before but needs further conviction and encouragement.

I do think the author borrowed heavily from previously published books on the topic of idols by Tim Keller and Elise Fitzpatrick; however, this book is short, easily digestible, and specifically aimed at moms. Also, the author includes thoughtful reflection questions and Scripture passages to consider.

[Autumn Barbur · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read this book as part of a Bible study with some other moms of young kids. It was very thought-provoking and enlightening. It helped me to see how so many of the good things in my life have become idols without my realizing it. Bottom line: if God is not first and foremost, something else will be. If I’m not worshipping God, I’m worshipping something else. I’m sure this is a book I will be retuning to.

[Claire · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a beautifully written book for mothers that speaks to the very core of who we are and what we are living for! Christina bases her discussion of idolatry on a firm Biblical foundation and weaves the Gospel throughout so that the reader is not left to despair. Highly recommend this book to other mothers as a source of encouragement and spiritual growth.

[Shannon Lowe · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent book that was very eye-opening and convicting. Written from a mother to a mother with no judgement. Christina Fox opened my eyes to the many different idols I have in my life and gave me tools to help eliminate and replace them. Great book!

[Grace Cox]

Idea for moms’ group.

[Deann · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book gave me some things to think about & evaluate. It would be good for new Christians or those young in their faith, but it’s pretty simple & basic. Didn’t get a ton out of it, tbh.

[Katelyn · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent, very convicting to me personally!

[Nicollette · Rating 2 out of 5]

It was okay but not having my own children yet.. I definitely felt disconnected from majority of the book. It fell flat for me.

[Taylor Gilman · Rating 4 out of 5]

great book, easy read, filled with biblical truth!

[Cindy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Let not your heart miss its true treasure in Christ while marveling at His gift of children and the responsibility that comes with them.

[Giezi · Rating 1 out of 5]

Excelente libro

Amé este libro, es un viaje emocionante leer cada página del mismo. 100% recomendado para mujeres, especialmente aquellas que son madres.

[Shannon · Rating 3 out of 5]

A solid, sound book applying Tim Keller's teaching in Counterfeit Gods to how mothers are uniquely tempted to demand their idols from their children. I have heard this stuff a lot, so while this book didn't shift any paradigms for me, I could really appreciate how well she expressed these truths.