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Things You Need To Be Told: A Handbook for Polite Behavior in a Tacky, Rude World!
It is indeed a Tacky, Rude World, which we inhabit. The Etiquette Grrls have decided that things are simply getting out of hand, and they have Taken It Upon Themselves to step in with a helpful guide to navigate the Etiquette Quandaries in your day-to-day life. They dish up advice on cohabitation, letter-writing, telephoning, traveling, grooming, drinking, dining, dating, and marriage and, it would be Terribly Rude of you not to pay attention.
Who are they, you ask, to be writing such a book? The Etiquette Grrls are graduates of New England Preparatory Schools and Prestigious Colleges; they are throwers of Great Parties; they can hold their liquor; their expertise on fashion and make-up and—especially Subversive Nail Polish colors-knows no bounds; they wear Doc Martens with their cashmere twin sets; and, most important, they know what they're talking about.
The Etiquette Grrls' advice has been featured in Ladies Home Journal , Chicago Sun-Times , and Business Week Online .
Who are they, you ask, to be writing such a book? The Etiquette Grrls are graduates of New England Preparatory Schools and Prestigious Colleges; they are throwers of Great Parties; they can hold their liquor; their expertise on fashion and make-up and—especially Subversive Nail Polish colors-knows no bounds; they wear Doc Martens with their cashmere twin sets; and, most important, they know what they're talking about.
The Etiquette Grrls' advice has been featured in Ladies Home Journal , Chicago Sun-Times , and Business Week Online .
224 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2001
6 people are currently reading
247 people want to read
About the author
The Etiquette Grrls
2 books3 followersA young man, a graduate of Deerfield Academy and Princeton University, takes his first job at a conservative publication. Within one week, this intrepid young reporter is walking around the office in cutoff shorts and bare feet.
A young couple, out on a Saturday-night date at a chic nightspot, are snappily dressed in vintage clothing, and order their martinis with aplomb. However, they chomp on their olives loudly, and make an unseemly roduction of stealing the bar's distinctive swizzle sticks.
A girl is staggering under the weight of an air conditioner. It is a very hot day, and she approaches a heavy door, which blocks her progress. A nearby boy watches with interest, as he stands idly by, enjoying a cold
beverage.
We are appalled.
Something has to be done.
We know what it is, and we know who has to do it.
This is a job for the Etiquette Grrls.
The Etiquette Grrls have compiled their wisdom in two books that every young person needs, Things You Need to Be Told: A Handbook for Polite Behavior in a Tacky, Rude World and More Things You Need to Be Told: A Guide to Proper Comportment in a Tacky, Rude World.
These are not your grandmother's etiquette books, with ample advice on how your calling cards should be engraved and how to host debutante teas. Rather, the EGs' books are guides to behaving properly in everyday situations -- in the office, on a date, at parties, at public events, even on the Internet.
The younger generation has discovered swing music and jazz, martinis, and cigars -- now there is a need to revive the manners that accompany such sophisticated tastes.
The EGs' tone is tongue-in-cheek, but their advice is timeless, timely, and sincere. Their mission: to impart chivalry and grace and to eradicate rudeness amongst young adults.
With their rapier-like wit, the Eiquette Grrls, in an arch fashion, dissect the spectre of rudeness in our society. And as said spectre lies bleeding in the streets, they repair to a swanky bar and toss back a few. They're just that sort of people.
The Etiquette Grrls in a nutshell? The wit of Christopher Buckley meets the style of Babe Paley, then puts on Doc Martens and dashes off to the Stork Club for drinks with Scott and Zelda.
Praise for TYNTBT/MTYNTBT:
- "The Etiquette Grrls are very funny, very wise, and very in your face. It's easier to learn manners when you're laughing rather than crying." -- Letitia Baldrige, author, etiquette expert, White House Social Secretary to First Lady Jacqueline Kennedy.
- "I laughed aloud. Those girls have got something there." -- Robert Sean Leonard, actor.
- "I fell completely in love with [The Etiquette Grrls]...they devote as much energy and enthusiasm to a thrift-store place setting as [Emily] Post did to Spode china and the heirloom silver...Their advice is better than that from some of their elders." -- P.J. O'Rourke, author, humorist, satirist, The New York Times Sunday Book Review.
- "If The Girls from The Rules...had a clue, they'd...start paying attention to this ultimate how-to girl manifesto." -- Marcelle Karp, co-author of The Bust Guide to the New Girl Order and co-founder of Bust Magazine
- "Outrageous fun." -- Houston Chronicle
- "Lessons that we would all do well to learn...such good sense." -- Montreal Gazette
- "Very tongue-in-cheek but quite palatable, practical advice for those not in the know." -- Pittsburgh Post-Gazette
A young couple, out on a Saturday-night date at a chic nightspot, are snappily dressed in vintage clothing, and order their martinis with aplomb. However, they chomp on their olives loudly, and make an unseemly roduction of stealing the bar's distinctive swizzle sticks.
A girl is staggering under the weight of an air conditioner. It is a very hot day, and she approaches a heavy door, which blocks her progress. A nearby boy watches with interest, as he stands idly by, enjoying a cold
beverage.
We are appalled.
Something has to be done.
We know what it is, and we know who has to do it.
This is a job for the Etiquette Grrls.
The Etiquette Grrls have compiled their wisdom in two books that every young person needs, Things You Need to Be Told: A Handbook for Polite Behavior in a Tacky, Rude World and More Things You Need to Be Told: A Guide to Proper Comportment in a Tacky, Rude World.
These are not your grandmother's etiquette books, with ample advice on how your calling cards should be engraved and how to host debutante teas. Rather, the EGs' books are guides to behaving properly in everyday situations -- in the office, on a date, at parties, at public events, even on the Internet.
The younger generation has discovered swing music and jazz, martinis, and cigars -- now there is a need to revive the manners that accompany such sophisticated tastes.
The EGs' tone is tongue-in-cheek, but their advice is timeless, timely, and sincere. Their mission: to impart chivalry and grace and to eradicate rudeness amongst young adults.
With their rapier-like wit, the Eiquette Grrls, in an arch fashion, dissect the spectre of rudeness in our society. And as said spectre lies bleeding in the streets, they repair to a swanky bar and toss back a few. They're just that sort of people.
The Etiquette Grrls in a nutshell? The wit of Christopher Buckley meets the style of Babe Paley, then puts on Doc Martens and dashes off to the Stork Club for drinks with Scott and Zelda.
Praise for TYNTBT/MTYNTBT:
- "The Etiquette Grrls are very funny, very wise, and very in your face. It's easier to learn manners when you're laughing rather than crying." -- Letitia Baldrige, author, etiquette expert, White House Social Secretary to First Lady Jacqueline Kennedy.
- "I laughed aloud. Those girls have got something there." -- Robert Sean Leonard, actor.
- "I fell completely in love with [The Etiquette Grrls]...they devote as much energy and enthusiasm to a thrift-store place setting as [Emily] Post did to Spode china and the heirloom silver...Their advice is better than that from some of their elders." -- P.J. O'Rourke, author, humorist, satirist, The New York Times Sunday Book Review.
- "If The Girls from The Rules...had a clue, they'd...start paying attention to this ultimate how-to girl manifesto." -- Marcelle Karp, co-author of The Bust Guide to the New Girl Order and co-founder of Bust Magazine
- "Outrageous fun." -- Houston Chronicle
- "Lessons that we would all do well to learn...such good sense." -- Montreal Gazette
- "Very tongue-in-cheek but quite palatable, practical advice for those not in the know." -- Pittsburgh Post-Gazette
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Displaying 1 - 19 of 19 reviews
September 5, 2008
I fear the useful advice in this book will be overshadowed by the unrealistic (why you should never take a cruise), the pedantic (what phrases to avoid in so-called civilized conversation), the irrelevant (how to treat your servants) and the entirely ridiculous (how to prevent your car from clashing with your hair.) It's things like this that will make readers, myself included, dismiss the entire book, which is a shame, considering it includes some actually helpful advice:
-Why you shouldn't insult your host's cooking
-What to wear to a formal event
-Proper cell-phone usage
Anyway, too much ridiculous, over-the-top pomposity to take anything seriously. Too many gratuitous capital letters. Too much "Franglish" or whatever they call their English-French patois that only consists of running a find-and-replace and turning every "with" into "avec." Meh.
-Why you shouldn't insult your host's cooking
-What to wear to a formal event
-Proper cell-phone usage
Anyway, too much ridiculous, over-the-top pomposity to take anything seriously. Too many gratuitous capital letters. Too much "Franglish" or whatever they call their English-French patois that only consists of running a find-and-replace and turning every "with" into "avec." Meh.
November 22, 2014
I have no doubt that this has lots of correct and pertinent information in it, but I couldn't read much of it because they can't refrain from using Capitalization For Emphasis multiple times in every sentence. They try to imitate Miss Manners and do not succeed. Where she wittily and kindly speaks the truth, they come off as catty and generalizing. If you come across these Etiquette Grrls books, do yourself a favor and pick up Miss Manners instead.
March 5, 2009
I picked this up because of another book I'm reading (The Perfect Union: A biblography about Dolley Maddison). Dolley was so proper that I though my manners need a quick brush up.
While this book is funny, witty and easy read (much better then slogging through Emily Post's handbook)I still have a few issues with the book.
1. Movie attire: Blue Jeans are just fine to wear to a movie theater. There is no way way I'm dressing up in a skirt or day dress just to go see the movies when very few people are going to see me. Maybe if I was on a date.
2. Tank tops are acceptable clothes to wear.
3. Likewise shirts with a sports team is also perfectly acceptable as long as they are worn to the event or at home during the game.
4. There is no "good" pass outfit. Ever. You should be able to manage your consumption.
I suppose also that manners are someone flexible to the family and area where you reside. Manners will be different in the deep South compared to New York City. And the best way to have "good" manners is to behave like your mother is watching you or how you would want to be treated. And take everything in this book with a grain of salt.
While this book is funny, witty and easy read (much better then slogging through Emily Post's handbook)I still have a few issues with the book.
1. Movie attire: Blue Jeans are just fine to wear to a movie theater. There is no way way I'm dressing up in a skirt or day dress just to go see the movies when very few people are going to see me. Maybe if I was on a date.
2. Tank tops are acceptable clothes to wear.
3. Likewise shirts with a sports team is also perfectly acceptable as long as they are worn to the event or at home during the game.
4. There is no "good" pass outfit. Ever. You should be able to manage your consumption.
I suppose also that manners are someone flexible to the family and area where you reside. Manners will be different in the deep South compared to New York City. And the best way to have "good" manners is to behave like your mother is watching you or how you would want to be treated. And take everything in this book with a grain of salt.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
February 6, 2009
I really needed the book their mothers would have written. This is more like etiquette for sorority girls. I already did that=)
November 20, 2014
This book may have had some good advice, but its snark & pomposity left me cold. & that's odd, because I usually love snark.
August 16, 2013
This is not so much a book on etiquette as it is their preferences. There are very few situations imposed that you would ever encounter out in the real world unless you lived on 5th avenue. This book has a few (though scarce) valid points on etiquette that you have to navigate a plethora of mundane stories to obtain that are nothing more than what you could find using your favorite search engine. If I could give this book negative star ratings, I would. It is not worth the precious space it will be taking up on your mind or in your bookshelf.
I was expecting to read tips from two elegant women who practiced what they preached but got nothing more than the distasteful rantings of two uptight women who lack common courtesy. A very fundamental part of being a well mannered lady.
I was expecting to read tips from two elegant women who practiced what they preached but got nothing more than the distasteful rantings of two uptight women who lack common courtesy. A very fundamental part of being a well mannered lady.
June 19, 2009
This was okay and somewhat informative (provided you haven't read a real, in-depth book), but the manner in which the book is written isn't nearly as funny as it was intended to be. It sounds like the authors are imitating Miss Manners, and poorly. The negative remarks about things the authors find personally unappealing (such as grits and yogurt) are also somewhat off-putting. In the end, this book isn't especially helpful and the authors give the impression they are far from experts in their field. I suggest you skip this one.
July 15, 2019
This is so money!
Not to be Rude and Terribly Tacky, but Smoking Indoors (except By Yourself in Your Own Home or with Only Other Smokers in an area in which there are NO non-smokers, Period) as permitted in this otherwise Tolerable Tome of Weisenheimer Etiquette is not merely THOR*, but Boorish, Inconsiderate, Arrogant, Offensive, Fascist, Without Regard for the Health of Others, Discourteous and Downright Ugly. And Excuse Me! for saying so.
Furthermore it is Bad Form, Poor Style and Terribly UnEnlightened to Actually Admit one drinks Gin and Tonics as Lesley and Honore do. Quelle horror! Does one know that gin is forty-some percent alcohol, an unnatural distilled spirit, and as aesthetically correct as day-glow hot pants? One might as well admit to Having Alcoholic Parents or to Lusting After a Cadillac SUV.
That aside, this petite bourgeois, New England-school, preppie frolic through Dear Abby land ain't half bad, and there are some genteel chuckles to be had if you allow yourself to just go with the flow and not think about The Fact that the authoresses aren't the Sort of People who will be inviting YOU to dinner. (All reviewers with the name "A Reader from ..." please raise your hand!)
So lighten up, Dear Reader. This is Humor, or at least it's The Old College Try. So kick off your Doc Martens, Toss Back A Few and enjoy the Too Clever By Half nervy scurvy advice from The Bee's Knees of Etiquette Please.
Which is what I did until...well, I know this is strictly Too Much Information (I'm wearing a full-out Jack Nicholson grin from The Shining (1980) as I write this), but since my erotic fantasies often involve Blue-Blooded, moneyed, prep school girls Old Enough To Know Better, it was Too Tacky For Words (not to mention a HUGE Disappointment) to see an actual, apparently un-retouched photo of the Etiquette Grrls on the back cover. Nearly Goth, and One Sees Why they had enough Time On Their Hands (p. 196) to watch Every Episode of Beverly Hills 90210!**
Needless to say, this Visual Revelation caused me to drop My Poor Boy Reverie and allow hard-core Ennui, A Light Malaise, and a Horrowshow Disappointment to pass over me as I went 23-Skiddoo into the Artichoke Dip.
*The Height Of Rudeness
**Why they actually admitted this, is, however, not explained.
--Dennis Littrell, author of the mystery novel, “Teddy and Teri”
Not to be Rude and Terribly Tacky, but Smoking Indoors (except By Yourself in Your Own Home or with Only Other Smokers in an area in which there are NO non-smokers, Period) as permitted in this otherwise Tolerable Tome of Weisenheimer Etiquette is not merely THOR*, but Boorish, Inconsiderate, Arrogant, Offensive, Fascist, Without Regard for the Health of Others, Discourteous and Downright Ugly. And Excuse Me! for saying so.
Furthermore it is Bad Form, Poor Style and Terribly UnEnlightened to Actually Admit one drinks Gin and Tonics as Lesley and Honore do. Quelle horror! Does one know that gin is forty-some percent alcohol, an unnatural distilled spirit, and as aesthetically correct as day-glow hot pants? One might as well admit to Having Alcoholic Parents or to Lusting After a Cadillac SUV.
That aside, this petite bourgeois, New England-school, preppie frolic through Dear Abby land ain't half bad, and there are some genteel chuckles to be had if you allow yourself to just go with the flow and not think about The Fact that the authoresses aren't the Sort of People who will be inviting YOU to dinner. (All reviewers with the name "A Reader from ..." please raise your hand!)
So lighten up, Dear Reader. This is Humor, or at least it's The Old College Try. So kick off your Doc Martens, Toss Back A Few and enjoy the Too Clever By Half nervy scurvy advice from The Bee's Knees of Etiquette Please.
Which is what I did until...well, I know this is strictly Too Much Information (I'm wearing a full-out Jack Nicholson grin from The Shining (1980) as I write this), but since my erotic fantasies often involve Blue-Blooded, moneyed, prep school girls Old Enough To Know Better, it was Too Tacky For Words (not to mention a HUGE Disappointment) to see an actual, apparently un-retouched photo of the Etiquette Grrls on the back cover. Nearly Goth, and One Sees Why they had enough Time On Their Hands (p. 196) to watch Every Episode of Beverly Hills 90210!**
Needless to say, this Visual Revelation caused me to drop My Poor Boy Reverie and allow hard-core Ennui, A Light Malaise, and a Horrowshow Disappointment to pass over me as I went 23-Skiddoo into the Artichoke Dip.
*The Height Of Rudeness
**Why they actually admitted this, is, however, not explained.
--Dennis Littrell, author of the mystery novel, “Teddy and Teri”
August 30, 2020
It is this Reader's infinite Regret that she was Unaware of the Etiquette Grrls until fairly Recently. As an Unabashed Etiquette Lover, to have been blissfully ignorant of the Education, Elucidation and Gentle Suggestions that the Grrls dispense has been painful. One is always Reassured to see such Wit and Wisdom displayed, and the Path to Better Manners clearly delineated. and the Grrls do it in Style. To them, one says, quietly and courteously, "thank you." (Proper thank you note, on appropriate writing paper, to follow.)
July 27, 2008
Etiquette is often debated (and, often, tricky to spell). The Etiquette Grrls provide instructions for the various situations and interactions most people conduct -- for example, how to handle workplace friendships (and the more tricky workplace dating), when and how to use a cell phone, and how to find and behave in a Good Bar. The Grrls have high standards for casual interaction, and warn against over-dressing and behaving in an obnixiously arrogant manner in addition to under-dressing and overly casual behavior.
While providing tips for hosting dinner, the Grrls encourage use of actual dishes and silverware, including any necessary soup spoons or salad forks. However, they discourage providing unneccessary and potentially confusing silverware.
The Grrls' suggestions include an emphasis on simplicity. Their use of Random Capitalization and Franglais will not appeal to some readers. However, their fusion of classic etiquette and modern living is a good reference for anyone who wants to behave better.
While providing tips for hosting dinner, the Grrls encourage use of actual dishes and silverware, including any necessary soup spoons or salad forks. However, they discourage providing unneccessary and potentially confusing silverware.
The Grrls' suggestions include an emphasis on simplicity. Their use of Random Capitalization and Franglais will not appeal to some readers. However, their fusion of classic etiquette and modern living is a good reference for anyone who wants to behave better.
August 21, 2007
I'm not just writing this because the author added me as a friend here on Goodreads... heheh. This is one of my FAV books of all time. I've given it to high school and college graduates, and the occasional bride who may have needed a wee nudge towards decorum. If you feel that your mama raised you to be a polite, well behaved member of society, you may want this book just to chuckle about how rude the world has become. If you aren't sure what qualifies as THOR (the height of rudeness), then pick this up and understand that there are certain things that perhaps you need to be told! :)
February 25, 2008
Some of my favorite quotes comes from this book:
"Yes, of course you can wear blue eye shadow....If, indeed, you ARE a clown."
"Yes, of course you can wear white shoes any time of the year....If, indeed, you ARE a nurse."
I tweak it and use it as much as possible whenever someone asks me about something horrid!
I Love, love, love these books. The women who wrote them were hilarious. They used to have a website years ago, but sadly, they no longer update it.
"Yes, of course you can wear blue eye shadow....If, indeed, you ARE a clown."
"Yes, of course you can wear white shoes any time of the year....If, indeed, you ARE a nurse."
I tweak it and use it as much as possible whenever someone asks me about something horrid!
I Love, love, love these books. The women who wrote them were hilarious. They used to have a website years ago, but sadly, they no longer update it.
December 2, 2009
Most reviews either say this book is REALLY FUNNY or that it's not funny at all. The truth is, if read as an informative piece of nonfiction (which it truly is), the asides and references to early-00s culture and the Emphatic Capitalization Throughout make it quite an enjoyable read.
I love old-fashioned advice, even if I don't take it, and books like these heighten my sense of at least Having An Idea of what Proper Etiquette is. See? I just ended a sentence with a preposition.
Do enjoy!
I love old-fashioned advice, even if I don't take it, and books like these heighten my sense of at least Having An Idea of what Proper Etiquette is. See? I just ended a sentence with a preposition.
Do enjoy!
May 5, 2008
A fun read! My favorite part was how awful they make you feel about cell phone addiction; I am much better (polite!) about my cell phone usage now. There were certainly some things I feel like I did need to hear, and while I am a better person for it, I am also now much more keenly aware of 'left-handed' compliments- people can truly be so mean!
June 26, 2007
these women make me laugh so hard. anyone who enjoys being proper and a bit of a snob will love this advice.
September 7, 2008
Fun, easy reading
August 21, 2012
I wasn't really a target reader (as it's been a while since I was a srudent), but it wad still a fun read.
September 24, 2019
Wow a lot of people took these books way too seriously. This book reminds me of the Official Preppy Handbook. I really enjoyed these in high school.
Displaying 1 - 19 of 19 reviews