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When the World Didn't End
Teen Instagram sensation and author of Light Filters In @poeticpoison returns with a second collection of short, powerful poems about love, forgiveness, self-discovery, and what it’s like living after a hard-fought battle with depression, in the vein of poetry collections like Milk and Honey and the princess saves herself in this one.
175 pages, Hardcover
Published August 20, 2019
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3969 people want to read
About the author
Caroline Kaufman
2 books382 followersCaroline Kaufman—known as @poeticpoison on Instagram—began writing poetry when she was thirteen years old as a means of coping with her depression. A year later, she started posting it online, and what started as a personal way to combat mental illness eventually became an account with hundreds of thousands of followers across social media.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 263 reviews
December 24, 2024
absolutely beautiful. i loved everything about this book. the analogies & metaphors spoke so well to me. i feel for the author and what she’s been through 🫶
favorite poems
“apoptosis
there are parts of myself
I had to get rid of
to get here.
I used to think growing
was simply evolving,
but there is also shedding.
there is also loss.
there are people who hurt me
and shaped me
and found their way
into my cells.
in order to move on,
I had to scrub them away.
the sick cells had to be destroyed.
the damaged pieces of me had to be removed.
and sometimes I’ve found
that loss
can be a synonym
for growth.”
“little girl,
tall snow boots,
even taller banks of snow.
jumping from large footprint to large footprint
in order to make it through the sludge.
it’s almost a game:
see if she can walk the path
without making a mark of her own.
one day,
not today,
she will decide to break away,
dragging her feet through
the cold and uncharted.
one day,
she will learn the importance
of leaving her own footsteps.”
“sometimes I try to keep
my pain close to the surface.
because I am scared that people
will no longer want me
once my memory
of the hurt runs out.
once there is no more sadness
to fill these pages.
it is so easy to
reopen closed wounds
when people see my bloodshed
as beautiful.”
“I don’t think
I will ever be satisfied with
all that I’ve done.
I do not see this life
as something you can complete.
I do not see this journey
as one that has an ending.
it is hard to be proud
of how far you’ve come
when there will always be
miles and miles ahead of you”
“you are the one I talk about
late on friday nights
when darkness brings out
the secrets in all of us.
you are the one I circle
back to every week,
sitting on the couch
of my therapist’s office.
you are the one written
between all of these lines.
it always traces back to you.”
“well, you made it.
you survived.
the unbearable weight suddenly lifted.
the endless night broke into dawn.
the uphill battle led you to a peak,
and now you stand tall at the summit.
so
what now?
what do you do next?
there is now air to breathe and room to grow
and time to fill and you did not plan for this,
you did not plan on having a life worth living.
and suddenly, there it is.
so,
what now?
how will you make the most of it?
how will you live the life
you never thought you’d get the chance to see?”
“I’m not saying I wanted to die,
but I was ready for it.
in that moment,
the only thing I feared more
than having to die
was having to survive.
the only thing I feared more
than having to break
was having to rebuild.”
“I used to have dreams about happiness.
always fuzzy,
always a little too far out of reach.
brief flashes of rose gardens
and park benches
and glowing birthday candles.
and I would always wonder,
is this the past
or the future?
is this longing
for a childhood I can
never get back?
or is this hope
for the person
I will become?
and I am so grateful
that it turned out
to be the latter.”
“every minute I have on this earth
is borrowed time.
I fought for it,
almost died for it,
and won it back.
I deserve to spend it
doing what I love.
I deserve to spend it
with the people I love.
and most of all,
I deserve to spend it
loving myself.”
“as a kid,
I could never decide
on my favorite season.
I would watch the first leaves
start to turn golden
on the edges,
and swear that fall was my favorite.
and then,
late november would
bring the first snowfall
with a few flurries in the night,
and I would smile and promise
that it was winter.
the buds on the trees
would start to peek out,
and suddenly
my favorite was spring.
school would end, and I’d
change my mind—
it was definitely summer.
and looking back,
it’s such a beautiful idea:
to have your favorite moment
be the moment right in front of you.
looking back,
that’s all I ever wanted.
for the best part of my life
to always be the present.”
“every time I speak,
I fear my voice is too loud.
I listen to the walls for an echo
every time I take a breath.
something in me feels like
I am not allotted this much existence—
I am taking up space
that does not belong to me.
this universe is infinite,
and still,
I occupy too much of it.”
“I was taught to contain my emotions.
your mouth is full of lighter fluid,
they said.
do not turn people into matches.
so I held my tongue with a clenched fist
and let my throat catch on fire.
I have gotten so good
at finger-painting with charcoal,
and still,
it is hard for me to speak
without choking on the smoke.
so forgive me
for swallowing kindling
instead of telling you how I feel.
I would rather turn myself to ash
than risk you getting burned.”
pre-review
i found this book when me & my sister were looking at the poetry section of a bookstore & i couldn’t resist reading it asap !! wish me luck 🤞
favorite poems
“apoptosis
there are parts of myself
I had to get rid of
to get here.
I used to think growing
was simply evolving,
but there is also shedding.
there is also loss.
there are people who hurt me
and shaped me
and found their way
into my cells.
in order to move on,
I had to scrub them away.
the sick cells had to be destroyed.
the damaged pieces of me had to be removed.
and sometimes I’ve found
that loss
can be a synonym
for growth.”
“little girl,
tall snow boots,
even taller banks of snow.
jumping from large footprint to large footprint
in order to make it through the sludge.
it’s almost a game:
see if she can walk the path
without making a mark of her own.
one day,
not today,
she will decide to break away,
dragging her feet through
the cold and uncharted.
one day,
she will learn the importance
of leaving her own footsteps.”
“sometimes I try to keep
my pain close to the surface.
because I am scared that people
will no longer want me
once my memory
of the hurt runs out.
once there is no more sadness
to fill these pages.
it is so easy to
reopen closed wounds
when people see my bloodshed
as beautiful.”
“I don’t think
I will ever be satisfied with
all that I’ve done.
I do not see this life
as something you can complete.
I do not see this journey
as one that has an ending.
it is hard to be proud
of how far you’ve come
when there will always be
miles and miles ahead of you”
“you are the one I talk about
late on friday nights
when darkness brings out
the secrets in all of us.
you are the one I circle
back to every week,
sitting on the couch
of my therapist’s office.
you are the one written
between all of these lines.
it always traces back to you.”
“well, you made it.
you survived.
the unbearable weight suddenly lifted.
the endless night broke into dawn.
the uphill battle led you to a peak,
and now you stand tall at the summit.
so
what now?
what do you do next?
there is now air to breathe and room to grow
and time to fill and you did not plan for this,
you did not plan on having a life worth living.
and suddenly, there it is.
so,
what now?
how will you make the most of it?
how will you live the life
you never thought you’d get the chance to see?”
“I’m not saying I wanted to die,
but I was ready for it.
in that moment,
the only thing I feared more
than having to die
was having to survive.
the only thing I feared more
than having to break
was having to rebuild.”
“I used to have dreams about happiness.
always fuzzy,
always a little too far out of reach.
brief flashes of rose gardens
and park benches
and glowing birthday candles.
and I would always wonder,
is this the past
or the future?
is this longing
for a childhood I can
never get back?
or is this hope
for the person
I will become?
and I am so grateful
that it turned out
to be the latter.”
“every minute I have on this earth
is borrowed time.
I fought for it,
almost died for it,
and won it back.
I deserve to spend it
doing what I love.
I deserve to spend it
with the people I love.
and most of all,
I deserve to spend it
loving myself.”
“as a kid,
I could never decide
on my favorite season.
I would watch the first leaves
start to turn golden
on the edges,
and swear that fall was my favorite.
and then,
late november would
bring the first snowfall
with a few flurries in the night,
and I would smile and promise
that it was winter.
the buds on the trees
would start to peek out,
and suddenly
my favorite was spring.
school would end, and I’d
change my mind—
it was definitely summer.
and looking back,
it’s such a beautiful idea:
to have your favorite moment
be the moment right in front of you.
looking back,
that’s all I ever wanted.
for the best part of my life
to always be the present.”
“every time I speak,
I fear my voice is too loud.
I listen to the walls for an echo
every time I take a breath.
something in me feels like
I am not allotted this much existence—
I am taking up space
that does not belong to me.
this universe is infinite,
and still,
I occupy too much of it.”
“I was taught to contain my emotions.
your mouth is full of lighter fluid,
they said.
do not turn people into matches.
so I held my tongue with a clenched fist
and let my throat catch on fire.
I have gotten so good
at finger-painting with charcoal,
and still,
it is hard for me to speak
without choking on the smoke.
so forgive me
for swallowing kindling
instead of telling you how I feel.
I would rather turn myself to ash
than risk you getting burned.”
pre-review
i found this book when me & my sister were looking at the poetry section of a bookstore & i couldn’t resist reading it asap !! wish me luck 🤞
January 25, 2024
"every time I speak,
I fear my voice is too loud.
I listen to the walls for an echo
every time I take a breath.
something in me feels like
I am not allotted this much existence—
I am taking up space
that does not belong to me.
this universe is infinite,
and still,
I occupy too much of it."
__________
"I don’t think
I will ever be satisfied with
all that I’ve done.
I do not see this life
as something you can complete.
I do not see this journey
as one that has an ending.
it is hard to be proud
of how far you’ve come
when there will always be
miles and miles ahead of you."
___________
"I used to be the best.
I used to fly through school with ease,
dreaming of all the perfect report cards
I would get in college,
in medical school.
then,
the depression found its way
inside of my bones.
my pencil would shake
from anxiety
as I took my exams.
I may be better,
but I am no longer the best.
and I’m trying to be okay with that.
I am trying to be okay with
not being the most intelligent
or the most successful.
but there is a voice in my mind
that tells me I could have been.
how do we forgive ourselves
for all the things we did not become?
for the decisions we regret,
the jumps we did not land,
the turns we missed that
could’ve led us to something beautiful?
I am still mourning the person
I was supposed to grow into.
I am still learning to forgive myself
for being the person I am today."
I fear my voice is too loud.
I listen to the walls for an echo
every time I take a breath.
something in me feels like
I am not allotted this much existence—
I am taking up space
that does not belong to me.
this universe is infinite,
and still,
I occupy too much of it."
__________
"I don’t think
I will ever be satisfied with
all that I’ve done.
I do not see this life
as something you can complete.
I do not see this journey
as one that has an ending.
it is hard to be proud
of how far you’ve come
when there will always be
miles and miles ahead of you."
___________
"I used to be the best.
I used to fly through school with ease,
dreaming of all the perfect report cards
I would get in college,
in medical school.
then,
the depression found its way
inside of my bones.
my pencil would shake
from anxiety
as I took my exams.
I may be better,
but I am no longer the best.
and I’m trying to be okay with that.
I am trying to be okay with
not being the most intelligent
or the most successful.
but there is a voice in my mind
that tells me I could have been.
how do we forgive ourselves
for all the things we did not become?
for the decisions we regret,
the jumps we did not land,
the turns we missed that
could’ve led us to something beautiful?
I am still mourning the person
I was supposed to grow into.
I am still learning to forgive myself
for being the person I am today."
November 18, 2019
I'm disappointed by this one. I LOVED Caroline Kaufman's first poetry collection. It hit deep, and it hit hard. However, I know poetry is very subjective. So try to take my opinion with a grain of salt.
This one felt like the poetry I wrote when I was in 7th grade and was trying to be deep, but I was really just writing down my internal thoughts, pretending they had more depth than they did. It reminded me of getting over my first crush before I knew what love was.
After the magic of her first collection, that had me tearing up at moments, I expected a lot from this. She kept talking about using "metaphors" in this collection, but there were none. Everything was spelled out, plain as day. You were spoon fed what every metaphor meant. There was no deep-thinking that needed to be done.
That being said, the collection of texts hit a chord in me. Enough to give it an extra star. And there were a few golden poems that had echoes of hope. Which I appreciated, since her last collection was so dark. And with the title of this new collection, I expected more hope than was in the pages.
Regardless, I love this woman. I love her previous work. And regardless of this one not "doing it" for me, she's still incredibly talented and I'll read any of her work that gets published. And I'll always applaud her for fighting her battles in a very public space.
December 31, 2019
I read this beautiful book and resonated with Kaufman’s writing through her most difficult teen years from acceptance and recovery into adulthood, without looking back while continuously moving forward to healing. Through her honest accounts, you are taken into her insightful and brave journey, touching upon issues of trauma, mental illness, suicidal ideation, self-harm, disordered eating, and sexual assault. Kaufman believes that through talking, hearing and reading, healing takes place and allows you to move forward.
I savored this book slowly and was able to reflect back to my tough teen age years and what allowed me to grow into a happy and fulfilled adult life. Her words give a lot of comfort to young adults who may be experiencing challenges and issues. She just has the right words to say in every circumstance. Though it may seem sad that she speaks about depression and maybe even hurting herself, I found that the overall feel of the book is hope, acceptance and strength to move on.
I highly recommend this book for fans of Milk and Honey and The Princess Saves Herself in this One.
5 shining and glistening stars on this one. Enjoy!!
I savored this book slowly and was able to reflect back to my tough teen age years and what allowed me to grow into a happy and fulfilled adult life. Her words give a lot of comfort to young adults who may be experiencing challenges and issues. She just has the right words to say in every circumstance. Though it may seem sad that she speaks about depression and maybe even hurting herself, I found that the overall feel of the book is hope, acceptance and strength to move on.
I highly recommend this book for fans of Milk and Honey and The Princess Saves Herself in this One.
5 shining and glistening stars on this one. Enjoy!!
May 21, 2020
I guess that sometimes poetry is supposed to be a little confusing and not everyone understand it, but while reading this I was confused by the people described. In her first book, I learned a lot about Caroline Kaufman through her poetry and her different stages of life. In this book, she described a female person and a male person, but I wasn’t really sure what was going on. Based off the last book, I know that she has had a very toxic relationship with a male person, so I was a bit confused as to who exactly the female character she described was. Was it herself? Or was it another person in her life? Overall, the meaning was beautiful and I love her relatable poems.
October 12, 2019
Thank you to BookSparks and their Fall Reading Challenge Campaign for a gifted copy. All thoughts are my own!
WOW. I NEED TO READ MORE POETRY.
BLOG || INSTA
This made me realize that I’m really missing out on poetry books. I generally don’t pick them up. Not because I don’t like poetry, it’s just not what I first think of. Clearly, I need to add a few more into rotation.
As someone who personally struggles with depression, I felt a lot of these poems. I was able to connect with Kaufman’s powerful words and meanings. Words matter y’all.
This is a shorter review because the poetry book itself is less than 200 pages, but trust me, there is a lot of substance within those pages. I read it in one sitting because I was entranced by the vulnerability and rawness of her words.
Overall audience notes:
- Young adult poetry
- Language: a few words
- Trigger warnings: There is an author’s note in the beginning of the book mentioning that some of the poems include themes of: mental illness, suicidal ideation, self-harm, disordered eating, and sexual assault
WOW. I NEED TO READ MORE POETRY.
BLOG || INSTA
This made me realize that I’m really missing out on poetry books. I generally don’t pick them up. Not because I don’t like poetry, it’s just not what I first think of. Clearly, I need to add a few more into rotation.
As someone who personally struggles with depression, I felt a lot of these poems. I was able to connect with Kaufman’s powerful words and meanings. Words matter y’all.
“I am a book
with the pages all worn.
the cover is tearing,
the ink is fading,
but I swear I’m worth the read.”
This is a shorter review because the poetry book itself is less than 200 pages, but trust me, there is a lot of substance within those pages. I read it in one sitting because I was entranced by the vulnerability and rawness of her words.
Overall audience notes:
- Young adult poetry
- Language: a few words
- Trigger warnings: There is an author’s note in the beginning of the book mentioning that some of the poems include themes of: mental illness, suicidal ideation, self-harm, disordered eating, and sexual assault
January 9, 2021
Listened to the audiobook via BookBeat UK!
Caroline’s poetry is always breathtaking to read. One of my followers kindly gifted me an e-book copy of Caroline’s debut Light Filters In last year during the first lockdown here in England. There are T/Ws for self harm, depression, bullying etc but they are VERY CLEARLY STATED before the start of the poems which I appreciated. An emotional listen overall!
Added to my Wishlist for 2021.
Follow my social medias for more bookish content from me!:
Twitter- www.Twitter.com/AllyBookKnot
Instagram- www.Instagram.com/alicetiedthebookish...
Caroline’s poetry is always breathtaking to read. One of my followers kindly gifted me an e-book copy of Caroline’s debut Light Filters In last year during the first lockdown here in England. There are T/Ws for self harm, depression, bullying etc but they are VERY CLEARLY STATED before the start of the poems which I appreciated. An emotional listen overall!
Added to my Wishlist for 2021.
Follow my social medias for more bookish content from me!:
Twitter- www.Twitter.com/AllyBookKnot
Instagram- www.Instagram.com/alicetiedthebookish...
September 16, 2019
Amazing growth. I prefer this collection to Kaufman's debut. Some pages/lines took my breath away. Beautiful.
March 5, 2020
Objectively, the poetry itself isn't very poetic, more akin to rambling prose. It is young and unrefined but the topics of mental illness, self-harm, self-love, and growth are all important. This book is probably very good for middle school as a way to broach some of these topics. It is Instagram poetry, so the poems themselves are probably what you would expect from that type of platform.
March 29, 2020
4.5/5 Stars
November 23, 2021
Somehow I can only enjoy, understand & love poetry with a lot of pain & heartbreak in it.
This was the main reason I loved Caroline Kaufman's first book of poetry 'Light Filters In' with all my heart.
But 'When the World Didn't End' is a journey of healing. While my heart is happy for the poet, the gut wrenching sadness it craves from reading poetry was not achieved through this one.
I only loved the first part of the 3 parts titled what was. I loved it because it felt like a continuation of the first book. The other 2 parts are well written & I liked them but they don't compare to the first part or the first book.
This was the main reason I loved Caroline Kaufman's first book of poetry 'Light Filters In' with all my heart.
But 'When the World Didn't End' is a journey of healing. While my heart is happy for the poet, the gut wrenching sadness it craves from reading poetry was not achieved through this one.
I only loved the first part of the 3 parts titled what was. I loved it because it felt like a continuation of the first book. The other 2 parts are well written & I liked them but they don't compare to the first part or the first book.
January 4, 2020
When I saw this book at Barnes and Noble I was so happy because I loved Caroline Kaufman’s debut novel. It was very important to me, as I read it while in the hospital for mental illness (which we now know is schizophrenia and bipolar) and her words really resonated with me.
This second collection blew me away. I had to take a picture of one of the poems because it hit so close to home that I almost started crying. I adored this book and I’m so happy that it’s my first read of 2020.
This second collection blew me away. I had to take a picture of one of the poems because it hit so close to home that I almost started crying. I adored this book and I’m so happy that it’s my first read of 2020.
July 4, 2025
▸ read on storytel
▸ audiobook
➥ ❪ 𝟭𝟰/𝟬𝟯/𝟮𝟯 ─ 𝟱★ ❫
wow wow wow wOw
▸ audiobook
➥ ❪ 𝟭𝟰/𝟬𝟯/𝟮𝟯 ─ 𝟱★ ❫
wow wow wow wOw
August 23, 2019
I feel like this will be my last poetry book for the year, read tons so far but... just want a break from them. With that being said, this one was deep and thoughtful and gave a much needed look into depression. So I picked a good one for my break 😅
February 25, 2024
2.5
tem alguns poemas bons, mas no geral achei fraquinho, parece algo escrito por uma adolescente do nono ano
tem alguns poemas bons, mas no geral achei fraquinho, parece algo escrito por uma adolescente do nono ano
July 31, 2025
Someone gave this to my wife while she battled and beat breast cancer… I enjoyed a couple of the poems . Some I didn’t care for though.
January 24, 2023
i like some of her other works better but this still blew me away
November 5, 2019
Always a fan of Caronline's poems💙
January 27, 2021
it wasn’t the greatest most life changing book or anything but it has definitely affected me and I made a home reading it. It was Cleveland, Ohio. And i hear Cleveland is beautiful this time of year.
💛 -“Cleveland, Ohio” pg. 132
💛 -“Cleveland, Ohio” pg. 132
February 5, 2021
Beautiful poetry but I found it difficult to tell where one poem ended and the next began as there are a lot of poems without titles and the spacing is weird. All entries start in the middle of the page and some continue on to the top of the next page or the middle of the next page and it’s very confusing and distracting. Also, some of the poetry was explained to the readers and so it took away that mystery and wonder of trying to understand the author’s pain. Overall, this felt very mediocre to me. I have heard great things about her first collection of poetry however, so I would like to get my hands on that and compare the two.
June 29, 2024
I'm so mad that I didn't like this book. I was and still am obsessed with her first book, but this one was...lackluster. It felt underdeveloped, with no real direction or depth. I even found myself cringing at some poems. This book had lots of potential, but its clear that most of these poems were infact built in a day. There was little to no focus, and no real growth or purpose.
September 5, 2019
Are you a woman who has survived mental illness, body dysmorphia or sexual assault?
when the world didn’t end feels like a soft place to land after the suffering.
“how strange it must have been
to see me sit up in my casket
right before the burial.”
when the world didn’t end feels like a soft place to land after the suffering.
“how strange it must have been
to see me sit up in my casket
right before the burial.”
August 21, 2023
Influenced by her own experiences with mental health, Kaufman's When the World Didn't End comes off as real as how a poet can describe their struggle. Many, if not all, the poems in this book are related towards topics of depression, pain, recovery, trauma, and other similar issues. However, while she writes on dark topics, much of the tone is from someone who survived. Kaufman appears to be reconnecting with her past self in these words, and showing that her future could always be possible even with the cards she dealt with. If anything, the poetry here shows her having a more positive outlook in her situations while keeping her health under control. Kaufman is pretty blunt on the issues she suffered from most of her youth and well aware of the pain it caused her.
Having never read Kaufman's other works, I will say When The World Didn't End is a surprising piece of work. Some of the works are relatable and I can see why it would attract readers in here, but the main reason that I find it appealing is because of how blunt she is about her dark past. There was no sugar-coating in her tone nor were words coming off as flavorful, if you get what I mean. Even with the dark issues, it is a welcoming piece to read about someone who looks at the past, but doesn't let it define their future.
Having never read Kaufman's other works, I will say When The World Didn't End is a surprising piece of work. Some of the works are relatable and I can see why it would attract readers in here, but the main reason that I find it appealing is because of how blunt she is about her dark past. There was no sugar-coating in her tone nor were words coming off as flavorful, if you get what I mean. Even with the dark issues, it is a welcoming piece to read about someone who looks at the past, but doesn't let it define their future.
May 25, 2022
There are some wonderful poems in this collection and the author does a fantastic job of telling her story. However, the philosophy she lands on in the end, which is the mindset that is supposed to enable her healing and continued survival, does not seem sustainable. I'm concerned that her intense self-reliability is only setting up for failure and more pain.
So, the poetry itself? Incredible. There are so many lines I thought about sharing, so many things that snuck into my mind and my heart and just made sense.
But the book as a whole, as a story and philosophy told through poems? It fell flat and leaves me concerned and disappointed.
So, the poetry itself? Incredible. There are so many lines I thought about sharing, so many things that snuck into my mind and my heart and just made sense.
But the book as a whole, as a story and philosophy told through poems? It fell flat and leaves me concerned and disappointed.
March 3, 2020
I loved this book. I have never really heard of Caroline Kaufman before but this hit hard for me. The meaning behind it was beautiful and I had to buy both books myself. The poems inside the book were very simple but filled with emotion for the reader to experience the pain and what she went through. I could very much relate to this book and the story behind it. I hope you as the reader enjoys it as much as I did.💙👍
February 10, 2022
The feeling I get when I read poem books is unreal. I get brought into a world completely different and it is only a few sentences long but it pulls me into a whole new world. When the World Didn't End isn't your typical love poem it talks about mental health and the struggle behind it. It brings up the struggling with friends and family and even love life.
May 25, 2021
If you are young, dealing with mental illness and struggling with finding love - this might be a good read. For me, it felt like angsty teenage poetry which I guess it is. There is certainly an audience for this book but it isn't me.
That being said, there are a few gems within these pages.
That being said, there are a few gems within these pages.
February 11, 2022
I haven't read a lot of poetry books but now I feel like I should be reading more. This book hits deep. I feel like I was able to relate to some of the poems. It gives a clear background of self-harm, depression, bullying, and more which I think is so great in this book.
June 28, 2023
The words flowed and I enjoyed Caroline's narration, however it just wasn't a favorite of mine. No reason as far as her writing, she is pretty brilliant with words. I just did not relate to some of it.
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