In October 2016, hiker Annie Schmidt went missing in the Columbia River Gorge. I knew that this book would be a testament of God’s guidance as a family searched for the body; I figured there would be some information in here, too, about Jon Schmidt’s career and celebrity as a member of The Piano Guys. I also knew this book would be about Annie herself, her love for others and her happy spirit. Yes, this book was about all of those things — but mostly it was about an ordinary mother learning to trust in God.
With great authenticity, Michelle Schmidt shares lessons she’s learned over the years: the pride she had to recognize in herself and set aside over and over again, and how learning to rely on the Lord through other trials prepared her to trust in the Lord during this ultimate test. I appreciated the stories of Michelle dealing with health issues, young motherhood, financial instability, and the depression that came because of those experiences. Michelle’s vulnerability in sharing this story - not just the shiny, happy version but also the moments of weakness - were my favorite part of this book.
Though I don’t know Michelle Schmidt personally, I feel as though her grief is intertwined with mine. I lost my dad to cancer in October 2016; he died on the 19th, the same day that Michelle discovered that Annie was missing. This happened just weeks after a big move. It was the pinnacle of one of the hardest, loneliest times of my life, and even two years later, I still struggle with it. I knew I wouldn’t be able to read this book without reflecting on my own experiences and grief, and I didn’t know whether that would be a good thing or not. But as I read, I could feel Michelle’s genuinely good intentions. I felt inspired and uplifted. I was reminded of times the Spirit has spoken to me, and I felt encouraged to strengthen my own relationship with God. It was truly a healing experience to read this book.
Well written, beautiful story. I’m so glad I read it.
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“At one point in the day somebody said to me, ‘I sure hope this has a good outcome.’ I thought to myself, ‘It will. The outcome is guaranteed. Christ made sure of that long ago. He has guaranteed our outcome.’” (p. 31)
“Wherever you find the gifts of the Spirit manifest through priesthood ordinances, you will find a safety net waiting there to catch you, to save you, to help you. I wonder if sometimes, for those of us who have grown up in the Church, this is a blessing we take for granted because we’ve grown used to always having it.” (p. 48)
“‘It is not easy to have patience. But it is easy to pray for patience.’” (p. 84)
“As I prayerfully sought for help with this matter, I realized I was being proud. I was taking credit for something that wasn’t even mine. Had the Lord not given is everything we’d achieved? The talent. The ideas. The people who helped us. Even the breath that sustained us from minute to minute. We owed everything to Him.” (p. 103)
Quote from Harry S. Truman: “You will be amazed at what you can accomplish in this work, when you don’t care who gets the credit.” (p. 105)
“I realized that all of my sacrifices, as overwhelming as they were, were only a similitude of the sacrifice of the Savior. My appreciation for the Savior and His Atonement were magnified and deepened. It cannot be described in words; it can only be experienced through the Spirit. We can’t really appreciate the law of sacrifice until we have truly sacrificed.” (p. 131)
“This experience was bigger than ourselves — we were being used as instruments in the Lord’s hands for the blessing and strengthening of many lives.” (p. 148)
“The ‘but if not’ attitude means that we surrender our own desires to whatever the Lord’s will may be. I wanted to find my daughter so badly, but I had to be willing to submit to the fact that our finding Annie may not be the Lord’s will. I had to be okay with that because, if my will was not aligned with His, then I would be distancing myself from Him and doing this alone. And on my own I would be a total wreck. He is my all. He is my rock, my foundation, my strength, my support, my Savior, my advocate, and my friend. There is no way I could risk separating myself from Him.” (p. 138)