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Confession with Blue Horses
"Tobi and Ella’s childhood in East Berlin is shrouded in mystery. Now adults living in London, their past in full of unanswered questions. Both remember their family's daring and terrifying attempt to escape, which ended in tragedy; but the fall-out from that single event remains elusive. Where did their parents disappear to, and why? What happened to Heiko, their little brother? And was there ever a painting of three blue horses?
In contemporary Germany, Aaron works for the archive, making his way through old files, piecing together the tragic history of thousands of families. But one file in particular catches his eye; and soon unravelling the secrets at its heart becomes an obsession.
When Ella is left a stash of notebooks by her mother, and she and Tobi embark on a search that will take them back to Berlin, her fate clashes with Aaron's, and together they piece together the details of Ella's past ... and a family destroyed.
Devastating and beautifully written, funny and life-affirming, CONFESSIONS WITH BLUE HORSES explores intimate family life and its strength in the most difficult of circumstances.
In contemporary Germany, Aaron works for the archive, making his way through old files, piecing together the tragic history of thousands of families. But one file in particular catches his eye; and soon unravelling the secrets at its heart becomes an obsession.
When Ella is left a stash of notebooks by her mother, and she and Tobi embark on a search that will take them back to Berlin, her fate clashes with Aaron's, and together they piece together the details of Ella's past ... and a family destroyed.
Devastating and beautifully written, funny and life-affirming, CONFESSIONS WITH BLUE HORSES explores intimate family life and its strength in the most difficult of circumstances.
352 pages, Hardcover
First published June 6, 2019
53 people are currently reading
1328 people want to read
About the author
Sophie Hardach
6 books38 followersSophie Hardach was born in 1979 and grew up in Germany. She studied economics and political science at Edinburgh University and the National University of Singapore. After graduating, she worked as a correspondent for Reuters news agency in London, Milan, Tokyo and Paris, where she now lives.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 151 reviews
January 4, 2022
Confessions with Blue Horses is a beautifully written novel, vivid, thought provoking and engaging. Shortlisted for The Costa book awards 2019.
A story of East and West Germany and the devastating impact of political division has on an ordinary family’s life when the quest to find a missing sibling and the truth about a childhood in the GDR becomes an obsession.
Beautifully written and a very thought provoking story of a family in Berlin during the dying days of communism, this is a heartbreaking exploration of a family cruelly torn apart, and each in their own way trying to put the past behind them even though memories torture them every day.
I really enjoyed this novel and while its not a history of the divide in East WestGermany it certainly does an excellent job of drawing the reader in and giving them an insight into life in the GDR just before the fall of the Berlin Wall. There is a wonderful sense of time and place in this atmospheric novel and you feel the fear and dread of the characters as they remember back to a time when saying the wrong word come could have serious consequences for a whole family.
This is a memorable and thought provoking novel that really kept me turning the pages.
A story of East and West Germany and the devastating impact of political division has on an ordinary family’s life when the quest to find a missing sibling and the truth about a childhood in the GDR becomes an obsession.
Beautifully written and a very thought provoking story of a family in Berlin during the dying days of communism, this is a heartbreaking exploration of a family cruelly torn apart, and each in their own way trying to put the past behind them even though memories torture them every day.
I really enjoyed this novel and while its not a history of the divide in East WestGermany it certainly does an excellent job of drawing the reader in and giving them an insight into life in the GDR just before the fall of the Berlin Wall. There is a wonderful sense of time and place in this atmospheric novel and you feel the fear and dread of the characters as they remember back to a time when saying the wrong word come could have serious consequences for a whole family.
This is a memorable and thought provoking novel that really kept me turning the pages.
February 9, 2022
This year marks the thirtieth anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall. I was still a child in 1989 and could hardly grasp the implications of what was happening. Yet, even as a little boy watching events on television thousands of miles away, I could feel that something momentous was taking place. Of course, the fall of the Wall was symbolic not just of a new era for Germany, but also of a more widespread collapse of communist regimes in Europe, and a thawing of relations between East and West.
It was, perhaps, inevitable that, given the weight of expectations created by this occasion, a sense of disappointment and frustration would soon set in. After all, new-found liberty and democracy, however strongly desired, would not and could not solve all political problems. New realities also presented tough challenges to many people, who had lived for decades – possibly tolerably well – under different rules and now had to adapt to what seemed an alien lifestyle. This might explain the appetite for books and movies such as Good Bye, Lenin! which seem to feed on a sense of yearning for life under the GDR, or at least, for some of its less unsavoury aspects. This feeling was widespread enough to justify the coining of a word for it – “Ostalgie”. Now, many would surely agree that “nostalgia for the East” is misplaced and uncalled for – an apology for en evil regime. One could also argue that Ostalgie is not directed at the GDR, but that it is a longing for a “construct”, a fantasy world which never really existed.
In any case, however, it is hardly surprising that even some ex-citizens of the GDR subscribe to a romanticised view of East Germany. After all, despite the suffering occasioned by the GDR’s dictatorial leaders, the suffocating political atmosphere and the privations, many people still managed to go on their daily life: people went to work, fell in love, got married, built families. As the past recedes, it becomes more of a foreign country and its increasing exoticism smudges and rubs off its darker corners.
Memory, memories and the way they articulate the past are an important theme in Sophie Hardach’s Confession with Blue Horses. The novel follows two intertwining timelines. One is set in the final years of the GDR, and introduces us to the Valentin family: art historians Regine and Jochen, and their children Ella, Tobi and Heiko. The Valentins live in East Berlin, in an apartment block very close to the Wall. Both Regine and Valentin have managed to carve out a respectable academic career under the regime, publishing books which have been granted state approval. But they both are becoming restless, and with the help and influence dissident artist friends, they attempt to defect to the West. Their plan goes horribly wrong. This brings us to the novel’s present – the year 2010. Ella who is now in her early thirties and, like her brother Tobi, is settled in London, comes across some documents belonging to her mother. They rekindle her curiosity as to what really happened to her family – particularly her mother and her brother Heiko – after the abortive defection attempt. Ella returns to a changed East Berlin and, with the help of an intern at the Stasi archives, conducts her own investigation, with some startling and unexpected results.
Confession with Blue Horses is a brilliant book. First of all, Hardach has a good story, and she knows how to tell it well. The changes from first-person (when Ella is speaking in the “present”), to third-person narrative, highlight Ella’s central role in the novel, but also bring an element of stylistic variety which keeps the reader interested, as does the alternation of timelines. There are several nail-biting key scenes (such as the night-time escape to the West) which convey very graphically the sense of danger engendered by the regime and its Stasi watchdogs. Hardach never tries to turn her novel into a thriller or spy story – she is more interested in her characters and their motivations than in exciting plot twists. Yet, she does give attention to plot, and the way she gradually reveals salient elements of her story turn this novel into an unlikely page-turner.
More importantly, however, the novel addresses potentially controversial themes with a great sense of balance. Hardach does not flinch from portraying the cruelty of the regime, the harsh punishments meted out to its prisoners and the daily privations of the GDR citizens (queueing for ages for basic goods). And yet, we are also given the points of view of people such as Regine’s mother, a Nazi concentration camp survivor who genuinely believes in the Communist ideal and views the West with suspicion, even as her daughter lies in jail. We even get to hear the point of view of two ex-Stasi guards, who see themselves as having been upright citizens defending the state and the law – they are despicable characters but they are still afforded the chance to defend themselves.
The book also raises related thorny issues. For instance, does knowing the full truth about the dark times of the GDR really lead to healing, or does it just reopen old wounds? Is “remembering” always the best way of honouring the past and its victims, or is it, sometimes, too large a price to pay?
Amongst critically-trumpeted new novels, it might be easy to miss Sophie Hardach’s Confession with Blue Horses. That would be a shame. Look out for it.
(for a fuller version of this review, including music by East German composers, visit https://endsoftheword.blogspot.com/20... )
It was, perhaps, inevitable that, given the weight of expectations created by this occasion, a sense of disappointment and frustration would soon set in. After all, new-found liberty and democracy, however strongly desired, would not and could not solve all political problems. New realities also presented tough challenges to many people, who had lived for decades – possibly tolerably well – under different rules and now had to adapt to what seemed an alien lifestyle. This might explain the appetite for books and movies such as Good Bye, Lenin! which seem to feed on a sense of yearning for life under the GDR, or at least, for some of its less unsavoury aspects. This feeling was widespread enough to justify the coining of a word for it – “Ostalgie”. Now, many would surely agree that “nostalgia for the East” is misplaced and uncalled for – an apology for en evil regime. One could also argue that Ostalgie is not directed at the GDR, but that it is a longing for a “construct”, a fantasy world which never really existed.
In any case, however, it is hardly surprising that even some ex-citizens of the GDR subscribe to a romanticised view of East Germany. After all, despite the suffering occasioned by the GDR’s dictatorial leaders, the suffocating political atmosphere and the privations, many people still managed to go on their daily life: people went to work, fell in love, got married, built families. As the past recedes, it becomes more of a foreign country and its increasing exoticism smudges and rubs off its darker corners.
Memory, memories and the way they articulate the past are an important theme in Sophie Hardach’s Confession with Blue Horses. The novel follows two intertwining timelines. One is set in the final years of the GDR, and introduces us to the Valentin family: art historians Regine and Jochen, and their children Ella, Tobi and Heiko. The Valentins live in East Berlin, in an apartment block very close to the Wall. Both Regine and Valentin have managed to carve out a respectable academic career under the regime, publishing books which have been granted state approval. But they both are becoming restless, and with the help and influence dissident artist friends, they attempt to defect to the West. Their plan goes horribly wrong. This brings us to the novel’s present – the year 2010. Ella who is now in her early thirties and, like her brother Tobi, is settled in London, comes across some documents belonging to her mother. They rekindle her curiosity as to what really happened to her family – particularly her mother and her brother Heiko – after the abortive defection attempt. Ella returns to a changed East Berlin and, with the help of an intern at the Stasi archives, conducts her own investigation, with some startling and unexpected results.
Confession with Blue Horses is a brilliant book. First of all, Hardach has a good story, and she knows how to tell it well. The changes from first-person (when Ella is speaking in the “present”), to third-person narrative, highlight Ella’s central role in the novel, but also bring an element of stylistic variety which keeps the reader interested, as does the alternation of timelines. There are several nail-biting key scenes (such as the night-time escape to the West) which convey very graphically the sense of danger engendered by the regime and its Stasi watchdogs. Hardach never tries to turn her novel into a thriller or spy story – she is more interested in her characters and their motivations than in exciting plot twists. Yet, she does give attention to plot, and the way she gradually reveals salient elements of her story turn this novel into an unlikely page-turner.
More importantly, however, the novel addresses potentially controversial themes with a great sense of balance. Hardach does not flinch from portraying the cruelty of the regime, the harsh punishments meted out to its prisoners and the daily privations of the GDR citizens (queueing for ages for basic goods). And yet, we are also given the points of view of people such as Regine’s mother, a Nazi concentration camp survivor who genuinely believes in the Communist ideal and views the West with suspicion, even as her daughter lies in jail. We even get to hear the point of view of two ex-Stasi guards, who see themselves as having been upright citizens defending the state and the law – they are despicable characters but they are still afforded the chance to defend themselves.
The book also raises related thorny issues. For instance, does knowing the full truth about the dark times of the GDR really lead to healing, or does it just reopen old wounds? Is “remembering” always the best way of honouring the past and its victims, or is it, sometimes, too large a price to pay?
Amongst critically-trumpeted new novels, it might be easy to miss Sophie Hardach’s Confession with Blue Horses. That would be a shame. Look out for it.
(for a fuller version of this review, including music by East German composers, visit https://endsoftheword.blogspot.com/20... )
August 28, 2021
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3.25 stars
In Confession with Blue Horses Sophie Hardach captures the fraught atmosphere between East and West Germany.
When Ella, a rather aimless thirty-something year old, comes across some of her mother's diaries, she's drawn back to her birth city, Berlin, where, assisted by an intern archivist, she will try to uncover who betrayed her parents all those years ago and the fate of her younger brother, Heiko.
Moving between past and contemporary Berlin, Hardach's contrasts the stifling climate, as well as fear and suspicion, that pervaded the lives of GDR citizens to the bohemian and artistic Berlin of the 2010s. Yet, as Ella discovers on her trip, few people have forgotten the past.
While the 'daughter finds papers/diaries from a female relative and decides to uncover secrets from the past' is a rather tired premise, Hardach focuses on a time that has not received enormous attention in fiction (these type of dual narratives usually take place between now and WWII). Hardach excels in depicting Berlin and its different people, showing us that families, like Ella's, can have divided allegiances. Rather than completely demonising those who worked for or respected the GDR, she gives these characters a chance to express themselves and their views. Her narrative navigates themes such as guilt and culpability with poignancy.
Given the nature of this story's subject Hardach touches upon some frankly horrific topics, but she does so with an unsentimental approach.
What perhaps kept me from being fully immersed in this novel was the characterisation of certain characters. While those who have only small appearances struck me as believable, Ella and her family lacked...personality. Her parents and Toby in particular seemed somewhat unfinished portraits. While I understood that someone with PTSD could be a difficult character to render, someone like Toby should have had a lot more development. Ella too was very much reduced to her quest to find the truth about her parents failed escape attempt and of what happened to her little brother. Supposedly she is an artist but she never seems to think of her art or artistic process.
Not only does the storyline switch between Ella's childhood to her present but there are a few chapters from the third perspective that focus on Aaron. These chapters felt somewhat out of place. Aaron remained a bit of a non-entity, whose only purpose is to assist Ella in her quest.
While I really appreciated the way Hardach's handles difficult subjects matters, the wit and sorrow of her prose, and the mentions of Christa Wolf, part of me was left wanting more. The storyline treads a familiar and fairly predictable path.
Read more reviews on my blog / / / View all my reviews on Goodreads
3.25 stars
“A year or so after my mother died, I received an unexpected inheritance.”
In Confession with Blue Horses Sophie Hardach captures the fraught atmosphere between East and West Germany.
When Ella, a rather aimless thirty-something year old, comes across some of her mother's diaries, she's drawn back to her birth city, Berlin, where, assisted by an intern archivist, she will try to uncover who betrayed her parents all those years ago and the fate of her younger brother, Heiko.
Moving between past and contemporary Berlin, Hardach's contrasts the stifling climate, as well as fear and suspicion, that pervaded the lives of GDR citizens to the bohemian and artistic Berlin of the 2010s. Yet, as Ella discovers on her trip, few people have forgotten the past.
While the 'daughter finds papers/diaries from a female relative and decides to uncover secrets from the past' is a rather tired premise, Hardach focuses on a time that has not received enormous attention in fiction (these type of dual narratives usually take place between now and WWII). Hardach excels in depicting Berlin and its different people, showing us that families, like Ella's, can have divided allegiances. Rather than completely demonising those who worked for or respected the GDR, she gives these characters a chance to express themselves and their views. Her narrative navigates themes such as guilt and culpability with poignancy.
Given the nature of this story's subject Hardach touches upon some frankly horrific topics, but she does so with an unsentimental approach.
What perhaps kept me from being fully immersed in this novel was the characterisation of certain characters. While those who have only small appearances struck me as believable, Ella and her family lacked...personality. Her parents and Toby in particular seemed somewhat unfinished portraits. While I understood that someone with PTSD could be a difficult character to render, someone like Toby should have had a lot more development. Ella too was very much reduced to her quest to find the truth about her parents failed escape attempt and of what happened to her little brother. Supposedly she is an artist but she never seems to think of her art or artistic process.
Not only does the storyline switch between Ella's childhood to her present but there are a few chapters from the third perspective that focus on Aaron. These chapters felt somewhat out of place. Aaron remained a bit of a non-entity, whose only purpose is to assist Ella in her quest.
While I really appreciated the way Hardach's handles difficult subjects matters, the wit and sorrow of her prose, and the mentions of Christa Wolf, part of me was left wanting more. The storyline treads a familiar and fairly predictable path.
Read more reviews on my blog / / / View all my reviews on Goodreads
January 17, 2020
(4.5) Alas that I read this too late for it to make it onto my Best of 2019 rundown. I’m grateful to the Costa Awards shortlist for making me aware of a book I might never have heard of otherwise – and would probably have discounted for superficial reasons like an unknown author, a weird title, a twee cover and my lack of interest in East German history. (Come on, we all judge books like this sometimes, don’t we?)
In 2010 Ella, a faltering artist living on a boat in London, receives a parcel of her late mother’s belongings: some art books, a notebook, a letter to a German archive, and a photograph of a painting of three blue horses. Ella remembers a family story that grew up around this painting done by a friend: there once were three children (Ella and her younger brothers, Tobi and Heiko) who lived in a bathtub, but a sorcerer took them away to his castle and turned them into blue horses. When her parents, East German art historians who came under Stasi surveillance, were caught trying to defect during a ‘vacation’ in Hungary in the summer of 1987, the children were taken away from them. Ella and Tobi were returned to their grandmother while their mother served a prison sentence, but Heiko was adopted by loyalists.
Ella is determined to find her brother, whom they’ve had no word of since, and to resume her mother’s correspondence with the Stasi archive to find out more about why she was arrested and who betrayed them. Interspersed with her first-person sections are chapters from the perspective of Aaron, an English intern at the archive who helps Ella by literally piecing together her family’s records from a bag of shredded paper.
I soon realized I’d had no idea of what went on in the divided Germany. You don’t think of propaganda, spying and state oppression as things that could still happen in the West in the late 1980s. So I felt that I learned a lot by reading this, but it’s never worthy or didactic. Mostly I found it very emotionally involving as you trace this one ordinary family’s losses and reconstruction. Ella, like so many others who make the pilgrimage to the archive, comes to wonder whether the truth is all it’s cracked up to be – can it ever bring about the desired justice and peace of mind? I could see this being a good book club book as well.
Two favorite lines:
“I’m working on a topography of memory.”
“History is written by adults, isn’t it?”
Readalikes:
Everything Under by Daisy Johnson
Testament by Kim Sherwood
Bottled Goods by Sophie van Llewyn
The Hiding Game by Naomi Wood
In 2010 Ella, a faltering artist living on a boat in London, receives a parcel of her late mother’s belongings: some art books, a notebook, a letter to a German archive, and a photograph of a painting of three blue horses. Ella remembers a family story that grew up around this painting done by a friend: there once were three children (Ella and her younger brothers, Tobi and Heiko) who lived in a bathtub, but a sorcerer took them away to his castle and turned them into blue horses. When her parents, East German art historians who came under Stasi surveillance, were caught trying to defect during a ‘vacation’ in Hungary in the summer of 1987, the children were taken away from them. Ella and Tobi were returned to their grandmother while their mother served a prison sentence, but Heiko was adopted by loyalists.
Ella is determined to find her brother, whom they’ve had no word of since, and to resume her mother’s correspondence with the Stasi archive to find out more about why she was arrested and who betrayed them. Interspersed with her first-person sections are chapters from the perspective of Aaron, an English intern at the archive who helps Ella by literally piecing together her family’s records from a bag of shredded paper.
I soon realized I’d had no idea of what went on in the divided Germany. You don’t think of propaganda, spying and state oppression as things that could still happen in the West in the late 1980s. So I felt that I learned a lot by reading this, but it’s never worthy or didactic. Mostly I found it very emotionally involving as you trace this one ordinary family’s losses and reconstruction. Ella, like so many others who make the pilgrimage to the archive, comes to wonder whether the truth is all it’s cracked up to be – can it ever bring about the desired justice and peace of mind? I could see this being a good book club book as well.
Two favorite lines:
“I’m working on a topography of memory.”
“History is written by adults, isn’t it?”
Readalikes:
Everything Under by Daisy Johnson
Testament by Kim Sherwood
Bottled Goods by Sophie van Llewyn
The Hiding Game by Naomi Wood
April 7, 2020
This book had me hooked from the very beginning - such a strong story with a really satisfying ending. When Tobi's and Ella's German mother dies in 2010, Ella decides to follow the trail her mother took back to the former East Berlin to search for their missing brother Heiko. The family lived in East Germany, but only a year before the wall comes down they try to escape to the West with terrible consequences. Ella visits the old Stasi archive where Aaron, an English intern, is piecing together histories and confessions from the bags of shredded paper.
I found it especially interesting because my German mother remembers fleeing from East Germany to the West in 1949 when she was six. Her mother and two sisters crossed a bridge at night with some of the family silver hidden under the mattress in the pram where my mother sat. She remembers being frightened by gunfire.
I found it especially interesting because my German mother remembers fleeing from East Germany to the West in 1949 when she was six. Her mother and two sisters crossed a bridge at night with some of the family silver hidden under the mattress in the pram where my mother sat. She remembers being frightened by gunfire.
September 3, 2019
Are you old enough to remember the fall of the Berlin Wall? As a child growing up near the (then) Czechoslovakian border, a line of barbed wire that, according to my grandmother, gave way to a minefield, with watchtowers casting beams of light into the night, I had always been aware of the divide between East and West. We grew up with stories of people trying to flee across borders, concealed in cars, swimming across dark waters or running through dense forests, and getting shot by border guards. There was a song that used to make me cry, of someone imagining freedom on the other side of the wall. So when I read the premise of this book, it was very much close to my heart!
CONFESSION WITH BLUE HORSES is a heart-breaking story of the Valentin family living in East Berlin in the former GDR, in a small apartment close to the Wall. Regine and Jochen Valentin may have well-respected positions in academia and have a reasonably good life in the East, but feel stifled by the restrictions of the Socialist government. In a country where everyone is always watching you, and an informer and traitor could be living in your own home, it is dangerous to have dreams. So it is no surprise that tragedy soon follows in their wake.
Twenty years later, Ella Valentin and her brother Tobi are adults living in London. Whilst Tobi has left their childhood trauma behind and has made a good life for himself, Ella still lives in the shadow of her mother’s past and the disappearance of their little brother Heiko. Now that her mother is dead, it is up to her to continue searching for him, and she decides to go to Berlin to find some information in the old GDR archives that may give her some clues as to where to look for him.
Did you know that the East German state took children from politically undesirable parents and gave them up for adoption to punish them for their “unruly behaviour"? This was also supposed to ensure that the children would receive a good socialist upbringing from their adoptive parents, who were chosen amongst those loyal to the party line. This policy targeted parents who had been trying to escape and had been caught, and whose children were forcibly removed from them, as was the case with the Valentin children. Whilst Ella and Tobi, as the older children, were allowed to remain in their grandmother’s care, the baby Heiko – a much more desirable child for adoption – was taken away and never heard from again. How utterly heartbreaking! I could not imagine many worse things than having your child taken from you, and never knowing his fate, and I shed many a tear over this when reading Sophie Hardach’s touching story.
Hardach does a great job in describing life in the former GDR both through adults’ as well as a child’s eyes. Whilst Ella remembers her childhood before their attempt to escape fondly, her mother’s view is a very different one. I loved the way the painting of the blue horses had a double meaning in the story – it also meant something very personal to me, as I have special childhood memories attached to Frank Marc’s painting of his blue horses. Hardach’s story really touched my heart, maybe because my childhood was coloured by living close to the iron curtain and I related to many of her descriptions of the era. I also really enjoyed the reactions of various characters to life after the fall of the wall – what an eye opener!
All in all, CONFESSION WITH BLUE HORSES was a heart-breaking snapshot of life in the former GDR, taken both through a child’s and adult eyes. Lovers of historical fiction will appreciate Hardach’s eye for detail when describing East Berlin and her account of living under the ever-watchful eye of an unforgiving socialist government. Very highly recommended, even though the title may seem a bit strange ....
4.5 stars
Thank you to Netgalley and Head of Zeus for the free electronic copy of this novel and for giving me the opportunity to provide an honest review.
*blog* *facebook* *instagram*
CONFESSION WITH BLUE HORSES is a heart-breaking story of the Valentin family living in East Berlin in the former GDR, in a small apartment close to the Wall. Regine and Jochen Valentin may have well-respected positions in academia and have a reasonably good life in the East, but feel stifled by the restrictions of the Socialist government. In a country where everyone is always watching you, and an informer and traitor could be living in your own home, it is dangerous to have dreams. So it is no surprise that tragedy soon follows in their wake.
Twenty years later, Ella Valentin and her brother Tobi are adults living in London. Whilst Tobi has left their childhood trauma behind and has made a good life for himself, Ella still lives in the shadow of her mother’s past and the disappearance of their little brother Heiko. Now that her mother is dead, it is up to her to continue searching for him, and she decides to go to Berlin to find some information in the old GDR archives that may give her some clues as to where to look for him.
Did you know that the East German state took children from politically undesirable parents and gave them up for adoption to punish them for their “unruly behaviour"? This was also supposed to ensure that the children would receive a good socialist upbringing from their adoptive parents, who were chosen amongst those loyal to the party line. This policy targeted parents who had been trying to escape and had been caught, and whose children were forcibly removed from them, as was the case with the Valentin children. Whilst Ella and Tobi, as the older children, were allowed to remain in their grandmother’s care, the baby Heiko – a much more desirable child for adoption – was taken away and never heard from again. How utterly heartbreaking! I could not imagine many worse things than having your child taken from you, and never knowing his fate, and I shed many a tear over this when reading Sophie Hardach’s touching story.
Hardach does a great job in describing life in the former GDR both through adults’ as well as a child’s eyes. Whilst Ella remembers her childhood before their attempt to escape fondly, her mother’s view is a very different one. I loved the way the painting of the blue horses had a double meaning in the story – it also meant something very personal to me, as I have special childhood memories attached to Frank Marc’s painting of his blue horses. Hardach’s story really touched my heart, maybe because my childhood was coloured by living close to the iron curtain and I related to many of her descriptions of the era. I also really enjoyed the reactions of various characters to life after the fall of the wall – what an eye opener!
All in all, CONFESSION WITH BLUE HORSES was a heart-breaking snapshot of life in the former GDR, taken both through a child’s and adult eyes. Lovers of historical fiction will appreciate Hardach’s eye for detail when describing East Berlin and her account of living under the ever-watchful eye of an unforgiving socialist government. Very highly recommended, even though the title may seem a bit strange ....
4.5 stars
Thank you to Netgalley and Head of Zeus for the free electronic copy of this novel and for giving me the opportunity to provide an honest review.
*blog* *facebook* *instagram*
December 4, 2019
‘Once upon a time, there were three children who lived in a bathtub. Then one day, the sorcerer came and…’ His voice was half drowned by the noise of the creek, but it did not matter, I knew the story so well. ‘… and took the children away,’ I continued. ‘And he carried them off to his castle, and there he turned them into three horses, into three blue horses.’ ‘But their grandmother went after them. She killed the sorcerer, she lifted the spell, and she brought the children home.’ ‘Except she didn’t bring all three of them home, did she?’ I reached down and dipped my hand into the water. ‘She only brought two.’
Shortlisted for the 2019 Costa Book awards Best Novel Prize this Is a slowly paced and moving exploration of late communist East Berlin in the period immediately preceding the fall of the wall (and the East German regime), of a family ripped apart after an unsuccessful escape attempt (via the Hungarian/Austrian border) in 1987, and of a family and a society still coming to terms with the past and its repercussions.
Ella is living in London in 2010 as a struggling artist. Her brother Tobi is a landscape gardener. The failed escape attempt, when both were young children, lead to the death of their father, the imprisonment of their mother (and later exile to West Berlin in a prisoner purchase by the West), leaving them to live with their grandmother (a Buchenwald survivor who sees herself as one of the builders of the new socialist country from the rubble of the war) and the disappearance of their baby brother Heiko.
Ella receives a small bundle of her mother’s books after her death including her trigger book (a list of things of which she is afraid as they bring back memories of her arrest, inter-gagging and detention), a picture of three blue horses (painted by the artist whose footsteps they attempted to follow on their escape, and which took on symbolism afterwards) and evidence that her mother had visited the Stasi archives to try and find out the truth about her arrest and Heiko’s fate.
Most of the book is set in modern day Berlin as Ella decides to retrace her mother’s steps and is unofficially aided by an English intern at the archives Aaron with whom she forms a deepening attachment. The book moves fluidly between first party accounts by Ella (some in 2010, others in 1987-1989) and third party sections by Aaron in 2010 as well as parts of the Stasi files on Ella’s mother (particularly her interrogation).
This is a gentle and affecting account, but one which never quite came to life for me.
The insight into the East German regime is interesting if not really revelatory for anyone with knowledge of that time. The writing is competent but for all the emotional resonance of the story, a little functional and told as it is by Ella (and Aaron) we are always distanced from her mother’s true thoughts and experiences. Even Tobi, whose relationship with the past is more ambiguous than `Ella’s desire to uncover the truth, remains a bit of a cypher.
As a result I ended the book thinking that I would rather have read a non-fictional account, because I did not feel that the imaginative advantages granted by the novel format (the greater scope to use language, the opportunities to inhabit the minds of others) were exploited to a sufficient extent to counter the loss of the fidelity that would have been present with a factual account of actual historical events and individuals.
June 9, 2019
I am drawn to stories set in the divided Germany of the decades after WWII and people’s experiences when reunification began in the 1990s. In this one, Ella’s journey to Berlin to look for her youngest brother, separated from the family as an infant when their attempt to escape over the border went catastrophically wrong, leads her to the Stasi archive. Here she meets an English intern, employed in the task of painstakingly piecing together shredded documents, who helps her to identify people who knew the family in the old days and to discover what happened. It’s a slow process but a fascinating one.
The author introduces several interesting strands of thought and these remind me of Jenny Erpenbeck’s insights in ‘Visitation’ and ‘Go, Went, Gone’, for example the ambivalence of some Germans, in this case Ella’s grandmother, to reunification and how people returning felt like foreigners in their own country (street names changed, whole areas unrecognisable). The idea, too, that uncovering hard facts so long after the event might not be what everyone wants. Is it going to be helpful to rake over old coals and apportion blame? Will Heiko be happy to be found?
A passage that struck me particularly:
It was something he had noticed before in East Germans, in the ones who were children when the Berlin wall fell. Nothing surprised them. They seemed to have no expectation of the world being any particular way: they knew that anything could happen, and when it did, they simply adjusted to it. He found it a slightly unsettling but somehow admirable quality, this absence of surprise. It made you realise how naive you were to take the current state of things for granted, to think you knew what might happen next, to be taken aback when things turned out differently.
Much food for thought here. I enjoyed this book very much, both the story and the characters. High quality writing and a well-measured, non-judgemental view on people’s behaviour during really quite recent events. I’ve no hesitation in recommending it.
With thanks to Head of Zeus via NetGalley for an ARC.
The author introduces several interesting strands of thought and these remind me of Jenny Erpenbeck’s insights in ‘Visitation’ and ‘Go, Went, Gone’, for example the ambivalence of some Germans, in this case Ella’s grandmother, to reunification and how people returning felt like foreigners in their own country (street names changed, whole areas unrecognisable). The idea, too, that uncovering hard facts so long after the event might not be what everyone wants. Is it going to be helpful to rake over old coals and apportion blame? Will Heiko be happy to be found?
A passage that struck me particularly:
It was something he had noticed before in East Germans, in the ones who were children when the Berlin wall fell. Nothing surprised them. They seemed to have no expectation of the world being any particular way: they knew that anything could happen, and when it did, they simply adjusted to it. He found it a slightly unsettling but somehow admirable quality, this absence of surprise. It made you realise how naive you were to take the current state of things for granted, to think you knew what might happen next, to be taken aback when things turned out differently.
Much food for thought here. I enjoyed this book very much, both the story and the characters. High quality writing and a well-measured, non-judgemental view on people’s behaviour during really quite recent events. I’ve no hesitation in recommending it.
With thanks to Head of Zeus via NetGalley for an ARC.
March 19, 2020
What I like about this book is that the prose is written with great clarity, and that it offers a measured, non-judgmental approach to the GDR: characters, for example, who had suffered under the Nazi regime return from the camps and wholeheartedly embrace communism as an alternative.
That said, the story is told is a fashion which has been well-used: the daughter in the near-present (2010) uncovers papers that belonged to her mother, travels to Berlin and with the help of an archivist pieces together the secrets of her family's past - there are many, many books which follow exactly the same trajectory and this over-familiarity of structure and plot took away from the story for me.
Hardach asks important questions about how we today come to terms with Europe's turbulent past, and in the character of Heiko shows that trying to undo what has happened, unpicking history, isn't always best for the people involved. So an intelligent engagement with the legacies of post-war Germany but it would have been better for me if the plotting had been fresher.
That said, the story is told is a fashion which has been well-used: the daughter in the near-present (2010) uncovers papers that belonged to her mother, travels to Berlin and with the help of an archivist pieces together the secrets of her family's past - there are many, many books which follow exactly the same trajectory and this over-familiarity of structure and plot took away from the story for me.
Hardach asks important questions about how we today come to terms with Europe's turbulent past, and in the character of Heiko shows that trying to undo what has happened, unpicking history, isn't always best for the people involved. So an intelligent engagement with the legacies of post-war Germany but it would have been better for me if the plotting had been fresher.
June 17, 2020
I had had my eye on Sophie Hardach's novel, Confession with Blue Horses, for some time before I borrowed a copy from my local library's app. The novel revolves around a family living in East Germany, who are affected in myriad ways when the wall dividing East and West Berlin is raised, and when it finally comes down. I am fascinated by German history, and have read surprisingly little set within the relatively modern period. The Times writes that Hardach's 'unsentimental novel gives a nuanced picture of East Germany', and it thus felt like a good starting point.
Siblings Tobi and Ella grew up in East Berlin; their childhood is 'shrouded in mystery'. As adults, both live in London, but wonder frequently about their past. Both 'remember their family's daring and terrifying attempt to escape, which ended in tragedy; but the fall-out from that single event remains elusive.' Ella particularly wonders where her parents went when they disappeared, and what happened to their younger brother, Heiko. Ella also asks herself whether there was 'ever a painting of three blue horses', something which lives vividly in her memory, but which she has no proof of.
The prologue of Confession with Blue Horses begins in 1987. Here, Ella speaks of the 'jagged nervousness that was typical of both my parents, who were never quite sure how to handle us.' We are soon catapulted into the action of the family making their escape attempt from East Berlin, trying to get over the border into the west of the city to regain their freedom. They are not allowed to take anything with them; Ella recalls: 'My two little brothers were all they carried. We did not need suitcases, tickets, passports, keys.'
The story then moves forward in time to 2010, where Ella is living in an 'old fishing boat that had been dumped into Deptford Creek'. There are, perhaps, some unlikely elements within this story. On her deathbed, Ella's mother begged her not to try to find their younger brother, who went missing during their escape attempt: 'We had been looking for him for years, it was our only real activity together, and I had expected her last request to be the exact opposite: that I would spend the rest of my days searching for him.'
Alongside Ella and Tobi's childhood, and their present in London, a parallel story takes place in contemporary Berlin. Here, an English PhD student named Aaron is working as an archivist, 'piecing together the tragic history of thousands of families' during the tumultuous period of divisions within Germany: 'With a faint pang of guilt he realised that he was treating his internship as a thriller. Which was probably inappropriate given how much suffering these millions of pages documented, but then again, it was thrilling; certainly more thrilling than attending post-graduate research seminars at his university back in London.' Aaron becomes obsessed with one particular file - that of Ella's family. Of course, his path collides with hers when she visits Berlin, armed with a stack of notebooks given to her by her mother, and on a mission to unravel her history.
Overall, Hardach handles the sweep of tumultuous history well, and her research feels impeccable. She focuses on Ella's place within it, but also comments on how her parents and grandparents fared. The way in which the story moves back and forth in time is controlled and well plotted. I appreciated the differences which Hardach drew between the Berlin of the Wall era, and the novel's present day, which she describes in the following way: 'It was all rather fun and uplifting and yet it unsettled me because I could not find myself, or my family, in any of this. It was not just the yoga studios and the restored facades and the ivy winding in and out of the balconies. It was the people. Everyone was so young and healthy looking.' Hardach shows throughout that she understands how difficult it must be to come to terms with, and to reconcile, such a past.
I very much enjoy the technique of using different stories set in differing time periods in novels. I found there to be a lot of convenient coincidences within the modern day story, some of which did not quite sit right with me as a reader, but I understand that they were necessary in the grand scheme of things. Both storylines kept me engaged throughout, and whilst I did feel detached from some of the characters, I still found it rather a compelling read. I must admit, though, that I did not really warm to our protagonist, Ella; it felt as though she was continually holding things back, and she never felt entirely realistic to me.
Siblings Tobi and Ella grew up in East Berlin; their childhood is 'shrouded in mystery'. As adults, both live in London, but wonder frequently about their past. Both 'remember their family's daring and terrifying attempt to escape, which ended in tragedy; but the fall-out from that single event remains elusive.' Ella particularly wonders where her parents went when they disappeared, and what happened to their younger brother, Heiko. Ella also asks herself whether there was 'ever a painting of three blue horses', something which lives vividly in her memory, but which she has no proof of.
The prologue of Confession with Blue Horses begins in 1987. Here, Ella speaks of the 'jagged nervousness that was typical of both my parents, who were never quite sure how to handle us.' We are soon catapulted into the action of the family making their escape attempt from East Berlin, trying to get over the border into the west of the city to regain their freedom. They are not allowed to take anything with them; Ella recalls: 'My two little brothers were all they carried. We did not need suitcases, tickets, passports, keys.'
The story then moves forward in time to 2010, where Ella is living in an 'old fishing boat that had been dumped into Deptford Creek'. There are, perhaps, some unlikely elements within this story. On her deathbed, Ella's mother begged her not to try to find their younger brother, who went missing during their escape attempt: 'We had been looking for him for years, it was our only real activity together, and I had expected her last request to be the exact opposite: that I would spend the rest of my days searching for him.'
Alongside Ella and Tobi's childhood, and their present in London, a parallel story takes place in contemporary Berlin. Here, an English PhD student named Aaron is working as an archivist, 'piecing together the tragic history of thousands of families' during the tumultuous period of divisions within Germany: 'With a faint pang of guilt he realised that he was treating his internship as a thriller. Which was probably inappropriate given how much suffering these millions of pages documented, but then again, it was thrilling; certainly more thrilling than attending post-graduate research seminars at his university back in London.' Aaron becomes obsessed with one particular file - that of Ella's family. Of course, his path collides with hers when she visits Berlin, armed with a stack of notebooks given to her by her mother, and on a mission to unravel her history.
Overall, Hardach handles the sweep of tumultuous history well, and her research feels impeccable. She focuses on Ella's place within it, but also comments on how her parents and grandparents fared. The way in which the story moves back and forth in time is controlled and well plotted. I appreciated the differences which Hardach drew between the Berlin of the Wall era, and the novel's present day, which she describes in the following way: 'It was all rather fun and uplifting and yet it unsettled me because I could not find myself, or my family, in any of this. It was not just the yoga studios and the restored facades and the ivy winding in and out of the balconies. It was the people. Everyone was so young and healthy looking.' Hardach shows throughout that she understands how difficult it must be to come to terms with, and to reconcile, such a past.
I very much enjoy the technique of using different stories set in differing time periods in novels. I found there to be a lot of convenient coincidences within the modern day story, some of which did not quite sit right with me as a reader, but I understand that they were necessary in the grand scheme of things. Both storylines kept me engaged throughout, and whilst I did feel detached from some of the characters, I still found it rather a compelling read. I must admit, though, that I did not really warm to our protagonist, Ella; it felt as though she was continually holding things back, and she never felt entirely realistic to me.
January 2, 2022
I want to go to Berlin now...other than that I didn't hate it.
December 1, 2020
There are times when I agonise over a great review opening but then I remember when my partner told me that it’s best to just go with your gut feeling. So I’ll do that.
I thought Confession with Blue Horses would be a modern version of the film Goodbye Lenin! Thankfully it’s not, although the setting is the same.
The main protagonist, Ell grew up in the GDR but now lives in London. Once her mother dies, she decides to look for her youngest brother Heiko, who was taken by soldiers back in the 80’s. Once Ell arrives in Berlin she begins to try uncover her past by piecing any of the evidence she finds, ranging from documents to seeking out people who were connected to her mother. The book is divided into segments ; Berlin from 1987 – 1989 and Berlin in 2010. I can’t give any more details because they will just go into spoiler territory.
However, what emerges after reading the book is a snapshot of the final years of GDR era Germany. The rations, The Trabant, cheaply made toys, the spying and frustration of being forced to conform. As the GDR segments are told through a child’s point of view, it downplays the horrors of that time. The book then also speaks about the freedom and restructuring processes which came about when the wall fell ( probably the first historical event I remember – I was four days shy of turning 11 years old)
The modern day Berlin sections also depict a new breed of Germans. Ones who are either conscious of their history but take it in their stride or are still suffering from the aftermath and try defend the role they played. The book also brings up an ethical dilemma in the form of an intern called Aaron, who works in the Stasi compiling reports of people who were taken or interrogated : should one withold certain information which may cause mental distress?
Confession with Blue Horses is a tightly structured novel. It’s pleasant, contains a couple of twists. A solid read.
I thought Confession with Blue Horses would be a modern version of the film Goodbye Lenin! Thankfully it’s not, although the setting is the same.
The main protagonist, Ell grew up in the GDR but now lives in London. Once her mother dies, she decides to look for her youngest brother Heiko, who was taken by soldiers back in the 80’s. Once Ell arrives in Berlin she begins to try uncover her past by piecing any of the evidence she finds, ranging from documents to seeking out people who were connected to her mother. The book is divided into segments ; Berlin from 1987 – 1989 and Berlin in 2010. I can’t give any more details because they will just go into spoiler territory.
However, what emerges after reading the book is a snapshot of the final years of GDR era Germany. The rations, The Trabant, cheaply made toys, the spying and frustration of being forced to conform. As the GDR segments are told through a child’s point of view, it downplays the horrors of that time. The book then also speaks about the freedom and restructuring processes which came about when the wall fell ( probably the first historical event I remember – I was four days shy of turning 11 years old)
The modern day Berlin sections also depict a new breed of Germans. Ones who are either conscious of their history but take it in their stride or are still suffering from the aftermath and try defend the role they played. The book also brings up an ethical dilemma in the form of an intern called Aaron, who works in the Stasi compiling reports of people who were taken or interrogated : should one withold certain information which may cause mental distress?
Confession with Blue Horses is a tightly structured novel. It’s pleasant, contains a couple of twists. A solid read.
March 5, 2023
Ella lebt mit ihren Eltern und ihren zwei kleineren Brüdern in der DDR. Es ist das Jahr 1987 als sie zu fünft, ohne die Großeltern, in den Urlaub fahren. Beim Versuch die Grenze zu überqueren, werden sie festgenommen. Zurück bleiben Ella und ihr Bruder Tobi, nun alleine bei den Großeltern lebend. Im Jahr 2010 macht sich Ella auf die Suche nach Antworten. Wo war ihre Mutter in der Zeit bis zum Mauerfall und ihrer gemeinsamen Auswanderung nach London? Und was ist mit ihrem jüngsten Bruder Heiko passiert?
Mich hat lange kein Buch mehr nachhaltig so aufgewühlt wie „Unser geteilter Sommer“. Wahrscheinlich liegt es daran, dass ich ähnliche Erlebnisse aus der Sicht meiner Mutter kenne und daher die Geschichte als - leider - extrem realitätsnah empfand. Die Methoden der Stasi, die generelle Stimmung in der DDR und der Umgang mit nicht-Sytstemtreuen wird hier durch Sophie Hardach aus Sicht eines Kindes und parallel aus Sicht einer erwachsenen Frau geschildert. Durch die zweite Erzählebene eines Praktikanten, der Stasiakten in Berlin zusammensetzt, wird einem erst das ganze Ausmaß bewusst. Die Autorin schreibt feinfühlig und gleichzeitig sehr unbeschönigt über eine Familie, deren Schicksal definitiv kein Einzelfall war. Besonders gefallen hat mir auch das Motiv der blauen Pferde, wodurch Hardach Aspekte der Kunst mit in den Roman baut. Der englische Titel lautet daher auch „Confession with Blue Horses“, welchen ich auch sehr passend finde. Von mir gibt es eine absolute Leseempfehlung. Ich habe das Buch regelrecht verschlungen, meinen Freund*innen davon berichtet und werde es als Highlight in Erinnerung behalten. Aus dem Englischen wurde es von Ulrike Sterblich übersetzt. Bitte lest das!!!
Mich hat lange kein Buch mehr nachhaltig so aufgewühlt wie „Unser geteilter Sommer“. Wahrscheinlich liegt es daran, dass ich ähnliche Erlebnisse aus der Sicht meiner Mutter kenne und daher die Geschichte als - leider - extrem realitätsnah empfand. Die Methoden der Stasi, die generelle Stimmung in der DDR und der Umgang mit nicht-Sytstemtreuen wird hier durch Sophie Hardach aus Sicht eines Kindes und parallel aus Sicht einer erwachsenen Frau geschildert. Durch die zweite Erzählebene eines Praktikanten, der Stasiakten in Berlin zusammensetzt, wird einem erst das ganze Ausmaß bewusst. Die Autorin schreibt feinfühlig und gleichzeitig sehr unbeschönigt über eine Familie, deren Schicksal definitiv kein Einzelfall war. Besonders gefallen hat mir auch das Motiv der blauen Pferde, wodurch Hardach Aspekte der Kunst mit in den Roman baut. Der englische Titel lautet daher auch „Confession with Blue Horses“, welchen ich auch sehr passend finde. Von mir gibt es eine absolute Leseempfehlung. Ich habe das Buch regelrecht verschlungen, meinen Freund*innen davon berichtet und werde es als Highlight in Erinnerung behalten. Aus dem Englischen wurde es von Ulrike Sterblich übersetzt. Bitte lest das!!!
November 12, 2019
Confession with Blue Horses is a rather magnificent novel that I enjoyed every moment of. It had me spellbound right from the beginning through to the end. Predominantly, this is a story about a family torn apart, but it also intimately explores what it was like to grow up in Berlin under the shadow of the Berlin Wall: that constant looming presence, the separation of families and friends, where life on one side was so vastly different to life on the other. This is the first novel I have read which has actually explored these concepts within this setting and I really liked the way the author looked at it from so many dimensions.
We have our main character, Ella, in 2010 with her brother Toby, both living in London. They moved to London after the fall of the Berlin Wall with their mother, but prior to the wall being taken down, they had for several years been living on the eastern side with their grandparents, while their mother was on the western side. She was a political prisoner that had been ‘bought out’ by west Berlin a couple of years into her sentence. Their father had been shot in the same failed escape that had resulted in their mother’s arrest. There is just so much that you can pull apart with this novel and really examine – it is filled with so much, yet has a distinct absence of clutter; a novel executed with such finesse and literary control.
‘It was something he had noticed before in East Germans, in the ones who were children when the Berlin wall fell. Nothing surprised them. They seemed to have no expectation of the world being any particular way; they knew that anything could happen, and when it did, they simply adjusted to it. He found it a slightly unsettling but somehow admirable quality, this absence of surprise. It made you realise how naïve you were to take the current state of things for granted, to think you knew what might happen next, to be taken aback when things turned out differently.’
Ella decides to return to Berlin after receiving a package containing some journals and art books that belonged to her mother. Bundled up with these things is an official letter regarding her mother’s enquiry into her own Stasi file. This instantly makes Ella interested in pursuing this line of enquiry further because she has a third brother, a younger one, who was taken from them when her mother was imprisoned as a political prisoner. Despite searching for years, her mother was never able to get very far in terms of locating him. These forced adoptions were rather common throughout the GDR, but after the fall of the wall, what had happened to these children was an aspect that was overlooked, so families remained without any knowledge of where their children had ended up. Ella feels compelled to follow this lead, that maybe by accessing her mother’s file; she might be able to trace her brother, whom she has not seen since he was an infant. Ella herself has not gone back to Berlin since she left after the wall collapsed and it was interesting to see her re-familiarise herself with a place that was so changed from when she had lived there, but still retaining familiar elements of the life that she remembered.
Our other main character is Aaron, who is doing an internship over in Berlin in what is supposed to be the Stasi Archives. I found this aspect of the story utterly fascinating. All of the efforts that were in place to recreate files and history. Literally bags of shredded documents where the ribbons and shreds were being pieced back together to create entire documents, the matching of words, fonts and paper. The work was incredibly meticulous and there was not a lot of room for error. It really pulled me up, physically, to contemplate this. The whole idea of people accessing files on themselves, trying to fill the holes of their own history; it is completely heartbreaking. Moreover, for many, the destruction of files went beyond shredding, so there would be no possibility of recovering that information. Aaron was taking his job very seriously, but he was also possessed with a need to make something right for someone through the course of this work. When his path crossed with Ella’s, it became a bit of a thing for him to try to give Ella information, even some closure, about her mother and the possible whereabouts of her younger brother, via the piecing together of her mother’s Stasi file.
‘She had been spied on, and she had spied on others. I believed that she had forgotten her brief affair with the Stasi as a young woman, because a human life is very long and many memories vanish along the way, especially the more inconvenient ones.’
The novel unfolds from three angles of perspective. We have Ella as an adult in Berlin following the footsteps of her past, trying to piece together what happened to her mother, why her mother even had a Stasi file, and how this could possibly be linked to the current whereabouts of her brother. Her other brother, Toby, keeps himself very distant from the entire proceedings, preferring to just experience it all second-hand via Ella. Then we have Aaron, who is there working away at the archives, learning a lot about what life was like when the Berlin Wall was up, the sort of things people endured at the hands of the Stasi; there is a lot of confronting stuff that he unearths as he slowly pieces together the information available, shred by shred. Alongside all of this, we are revisiting Ella’s childhood, the particular period during the late 80s when her life as she knew it imploded.
‘The future had always seemed limitless to me, an empty space to be filled by life. But it was not like that. It had already been filled in for me by others. Others had decided that I would cross this meadow, others had decided that I would walk through this forest, others had decided that I would live in West Germany. Their ideas were my reality. It was like everything else in my life – school, clubs, homework, chores, falling asleep at night, waking up in the morning. It was all arranged by others. I had no power at all – not over the present, not over the future.’
I mentioned earlier but it begs repeating, one thing I really admire about the author concerning this novel was the multifaceted view that she offered. We have Ella’s grandmother, who is a socialist, believing wholeheartedly in what was trying to be achieved in the GDR by the Socialist Party. Whereas, her daughter believed the opposite, craving freedom so much she was willing to sacrifice everything to obtain it. Moreover, of course there is Ella as a child in East Berlin. I really felt this novel tapped into what it must be like for so many Berliners who grew up in the 1980s under the shadow of the Berlin Wall and then with it coming down and communism being dismantled; it’s such a different life to what I have experienced and this weighed heavily on me throughout. The whole idea that you could have been a spy whilst also being spied upon; what a web of deceit that was being passed off as a natural way of living. The effects of this sort of life was conveyed well through the characters of Ella and even Toby. I had such mixed feelings as well, being angry with Ella’s parents for even attempting to escape, putting their family into such peril, and yet I could completely understand why they got to that point and why they felt they needed to make a break for it. ‘Survive? I don’t just want to survive, Mutti. I want to live.’ It’s novels like this that really make you appreciate so much about the freedom we take for granted in western countries. It is also very eye-opening in terms of beginning to understand the legacy of what this type of existence leaves within a place, just as much as within its people.
‘It must be because we’re talking in English, I thought. The words ‘interrogation’, ‘prison’ and ‘surveillance’ were just tabs in a folder; they referred to objects and experiences without actually evoking them. They had no power over me, they were lifeless. Whereas the German equivalents, especially the terms that would have been used in East Germany – Vernehmung, Haft, Überwachung – grabbed me by the throat. I heard them, or even thought them, and was in a damp cellar, barbed wire hanging over my head, an unseen thing crouching in the corner. Darkness, rustling leaves, the sound of my own breath, and then a sudden light.’
I really loved the title of this novel and its origins. The significance of the title becomes apparent as the novel progresses and it is intimately tied to a photograph of a painting of three blue horses that Ella finds pressed in between the pages of an art book belonging to her mother. There is a little story that Ella’s mother would tell them about the three blue horses, but of course, there is more to the painting than a made up story. Of far greater significance, is the original painting of the blue horses within the context of a confession, reiterating just how perfect a title this is. I did find that this was a very life-affirming novel, such an important ode to family and love, about so many things that so many of us take for granted. I would really like to visit Berlin one day and just walk the streets, have a look around and really see and contemplate the legacy of the Berlin Wall. I do highly recommend Confession with Blue Horses. It is an outstanding novel, absolutely brilliant literature and it is definitely going on my list of best books for the year.
‘The blue horses were standing on a meadow dotted with wildflowers. To the right was a corn field, tall stalks swaying in the breeze. At the back, towards the horizon, loomed a dense forest. It was the meadow, and the forest. It was the place where we had tried to cross. Sven must have discovered the meadow during one of his painting trips to Hungary. A quiet area without a watch tower in sight, without a border guard. He had painted it, and months later he had gone back, crossed the meadow and climbed through the barbed wire.’
Thanks is extended to HarperCollins Publishers Australia for providing me with a copy via NetGalley of Confession with Blue Horses for review.
We have our main character, Ella, in 2010 with her brother Toby, both living in London. They moved to London after the fall of the Berlin Wall with their mother, but prior to the wall being taken down, they had for several years been living on the eastern side with their grandparents, while their mother was on the western side. She was a political prisoner that had been ‘bought out’ by west Berlin a couple of years into her sentence. Their father had been shot in the same failed escape that had resulted in their mother’s arrest. There is just so much that you can pull apart with this novel and really examine – it is filled with so much, yet has a distinct absence of clutter; a novel executed with such finesse and literary control.
‘It was something he had noticed before in East Germans, in the ones who were children when the Berlin wall fell. Nothing surprised them. They seemed to have no expectation of the world being any particular way; they knew that anything could happen, and when it did, they simply adjusted to it. He found it a slightly unsettling but somehow admirable quality, this absence of surprise. It made you realise how naïve you were to take the current state of things for granted, to think you knew what might happen next, to be taken aback when things turned out differently.’
Ella decides to return to Berlin after receiving a package containing some journals and art books that belonged to her mother. Bundled up with these things is an official letter regarding her mother’s enquiry into her own Stasi file. This instantly makes Ella interested in pursuing this line of enquiry further because she has a third brother, a younger one, who was taken from them when her mother was imprisoned as a political prisoner. Despite searching for years, her mother was never able to get very far in terms of locating him. These forced adoptions were rather common throughout the GDR, but after the fall of the wall, what had happened to these children was an aspect that was overlooked, so families remained without any knowledge of where their children had ended up. Ella feels compelled to follow this lead, that maybe by accessing her mother’s file; she might be able to trace her brother, whom she has not seen since he was an infant. Ella herself has not gone back to Berlin since she left after the wall collapsed and it was interesting to see her re-familiarise herself with a place that was so changed from when she had lived there, but still retaining familiar elements of the life that she remembered.
Our other main character is Aaron, who is doing an internship over in Berlin in what is supposed to be the Stasi Archives. I found this aspect of the story utterly fascinating. All of the efforts that were in place to recreate files and history. Literally bags of shredded documents where the ribbons and shreds were being pieced back together to create entire documents, the matching of words, fonts and paper. The work was incredibly meticulous and there was not a lot of room for error. It really pulled me up, physically, to contemplate this. The whole idea of people accessing files on themselves, trying to fill the holes of their own history; it is completely heartbreaking. Moreover, for many, the destruction of files went beyond shredding, so there would be no possibility of recovering that information. Aaron was taking his job very seriously, but he was also possessed with a need to make something right for someone through the course of this work. When his path crossed with Ella’s, it became a bit of a thing for him to try to give Ella information, even some closure, about her mother and the possible whereabouts of her younger brother, via the piecing together of her mother’s Stasi file.
‘She had been spied on, and she had spied on others. I believed that she had forgotten her brief affair with the Stasi as a young woman, because a human life is very long and many memories vanish along the way, especially the more inconvenient ones.’
The novel unfolds from three angles of perspective. We have Ella as an adult in Berlin following the footsteps of her past, trying to piece together what happened to her mother, why her mother even had a Stasi file, and how this could possibly be linked to the current whereabouts of her brother. Her other brother, Toby, keeps himself very distant from the entire proceedings, preferring to just experience it all second-hand via Ella. Then we have Aaron, who is there working away at the archives, learning a lot about what life was like when the Berlin Wall was up, the sort of things people endured at the hands of the Stasi; there is a lot of confronting stuff that he unearths as he slowly pieces together the information available, shred by shred. Alongside all of this, we are revisiting Ella’s childhood, the particular period during the late 80s when her life as she knew it imploded.
‘The future had always seemed limitless to me, an empty space to be filled by life. But it was not like that. It had already been filled in for me by others. Others had decided that I would cross this meadow, others had decided that I would walk through this forest, others had decided that I would live in West Germany. Their ideas were my reality. It was like everything else in my life – school, clubs, homework, chores, falling asleep at night, waking up in the morning. It was all arranged by others. I had no power at all – not over the present, not over the future.’
I mentioned earlier but it begs repeating, one thing I really admire about the author concerning this novel was the multifaceted view that she offered. We have Ella’s grandmother, who is a socialist, believing wholeheartedly in what was trying to be achieved in the GDR by the Socialist Party. Whereas, her daughter believed the opposite, craving freedom so much she was willing to sacrifice everything to obtain it. Moreover, of course there is Ella as a child in East Berlin. I really felt this novel tapped into what it must be like for so many Berliners who grew up in the 1980s under the shadow of the Berlin Wall and then with it coming down and communism being dismantled; it’s such a different life to what I have experienced and this weighed heavily on me throughout. The whole idea that you could have been a spy whilst also being spied upon; what a web of deceit that was being passed off as a natural way of living. The effects of this sort of life was conveyed well through the characters of Ella and even Toby. I had such mixed feelings as well, being angry with Ella’s parents for even attempting to escape, putting their family into such peril, and yet I could completely understand why they got to that point and why they felt they needed to make a break for it. ‘Survive? I don’t just want to survive, Mutti. I want to live.’ It’s novels like this that really make you appreciate so much about the freedom we take for granted in western countries. It is also very eye-opening in terms of beginning to understand the legacy of what this type of existence leaves within a place, just as much as within its people.
‘It must be because we’re talking in English, I thought. The words ‘interrogation’, ‘prison’ and ‘surveillance’ were just tabs in a folder; they referred to objects and experiences without actually evoking them. They had no power over me, they were lifeless. Whereas the German equivalents, especially the terms that would have been used in East Germany – Vernehmung, Haft, Überwachung – grabbed me by the throat. I heard them, or even thought them, and was in a damp cellar, barbed wire hanging over my head, an unseen thing crouching in the corner. Darkness, rustling leaves, the sound of my own breath, and then a sudden light.’
I really loved the title of this novel and its origins. The significance of the title becomes apparent as the novel progresses and it is intimately tied to a photograph of a painting of three blue horses that Ella finds pressed in between the pages of an art book belonging to her mother. There is a little story that Ella’s mother would tell them about the three blue horses, but of course, there is more to the painting than a made up story. Of far greater significance, is the original painting of the blue horses within the context of a confession, reiterating just how perfect a title this is. I did find that this was a very life-affirming novel, such an important ode to family and love, about so many things that so many of us take for granted. I would really like to visit Berlin one day and just walk the streets, have a look around and really see and contemplate the legacy of the Berlin Wall. I do highly recommend Confession with Blue Horses. It is an outstanding novel, absolutely brilliant literature and it is definitely going on my list of best books for the year.
‘The blue horses were standing on a meadow dotted with wildflowers. To the right was a corn field, tall stalks swaying in the breeze. At the back, towards the horizon, loomed a dense forest. It was the meadow, and the forest. It was the place where we had tried to cross. Sven must have discovered the meadow during one of his painting trips to Hungary. A quiet area without a watch tower in sight, without a border guard. He had painted it, and months later he had gone back, crossed the meadow and climbed through the barbed wire.’
Thanks is extended to HarperCollins Publishers Australia for providing me with a copy via NetGalley of Confession with Blue Horses for review.
April 1, 2022
This story was fascinating and heart breaking but also heart warming at the same time. The book is centred around the experiences of a girl and her family, who lived during the division and reunification of Germany. I haven’t seen many books that cover this part of history, so enjoyed its uniqueness in that. The characters were pretty well developed and the story didn’t seem to drag on. Overall quite a good read!
October 2, 2025
Was für ein zufällig passendes Timing, dass ich dieses Buch kurz vorm Tag der Deutschen Einheit gelesen habe.
Es hat sich sehr echt, realistisch angefühlt, keine übliche Dramaturgie sondern eine eher geerdete Bewegung der Handlung, was ich sehr mochte. Ich finde, dass die Autorin dem Thema ausreichend Realismus und Respekt gegeben hat.
Das Trauma von ehemaligen inhaftierten Menschen und zerrissenen Familien, die Arbeit der Menschen, die versuchen die Unterlagen der stasi wieder lesbar zu machen und auch die Sturheit von ehemaligen Tätern zeichnen ein komplexes Bild der Vorgänge in der DDR. Als Kind von DDR Familien bin ich dankbar für solche Texte, die sich trauen, in mehreren facetten darauf zu blicken.
Es hat sich sehr echt, realistisch angefühlt, keine übliche Dramaturgie sondern eine eher geerdete Bewegung der Handlung, was ich sehr mochte. Ich finde, dass die Autorin dem Thema ausreichend Realismus und Respekt gegeben hat.
Das Trauma von ehemaligen inhaftierten Menschen und zerrissenen Familien, die Arbeit der Menschen, die versuchen die Unterlagen der stasi wieder lesbar zu machen und auch die Sturheit von ehemaligen Tätern zeichnen ein komplexes Bild der Vorgänge in der DDR. Als Kind von DDR Familien bin ich dankbar für solche Texte, die sich trauen, in mehreren facetten darauf zu blicken.
November 4, 2023
This isn’t my usual murder mystery style of book, but it is a fiction mystery. The book is set partially in modern times and partially back in the last years of East Berlin and the Berlin Wall. The main character is on a search for her brother, who was taken from the family when her mother was imprisoned.
I enjoyed the history in the book; I loved the dark atmosphere the author could create for the grey authoritarian East Berlin and the contrast to brighter modern times. The story doesn’t move too fast, but the heartfelt emotion it was causing just kept me reading. I loved the connection with the archivist trying to help too and the exploration of morals and how values change with time. It may not have been my usual type of read, but it certainly had me connected to the characters and made me think about what is fairly recent history and the pain that will still be causing some.
I enjoyed the history in the book; I loved the dark atmosphere the author could create for the grey authoritarian East Berlin and the contrast to brighter modern times. The story doesn’t move too fast, but the heartfelt emotion it was causing just kept me reading. I loved the connection with the archivist trying to help too and the exploration of morals and how values change with time. It may not have been my usual type of read, but it certainly had me connected to the characters and made me think about what is fairly recent history and the pain that will still be causing some.
May 2, 2020
So much I didn't know about the time after the war. And a beautiful story too.
January 11, 2020
A wonderfully constructed story of heartbreak, unintended consequences, and reconstruction of identity. Set in 2010, when Ella discovers her mother had begun to search in the Stasi archives for Ella's little brother, forcibly adopted out during the GDR regime in East Germany. Aaron is interning at the archives, struggling with knowing more about the lives and secrets of ordinary people kept under surveillance than those people do about themselves. He must redact info about unrelated people in the personal files -- but what if those files revealed things about your own family that are best not known? Another storyline is set in 1987 when Ella's family makes their break for freedom, revealing the webs that people were caught in their communities and households, unable to trust anyone else not even themselves.
I read Stasiland by Anna Funder recently, which is the best non-fiction companion book and immeasurably added to the context of this story.
I really hate to remove a star from what was a 5+ read for me until the final couple of pages. 'Red herrings' were thrown in that spoiled the ending -- frustrating me with the possibility of different explanations for what I had gathered through piecing together the clues of the book. If only the final pages could have been deleted.
I read Stasiland by Anna Funder recently, which is the best non-fiction companion book and immeasurably added to the context of this story.
I really hate to remove a star from what was a 5+ read for me until the final couple of pages. 'Red herrings' were thrown in that spoiled the ending -- frustrating me with the possibility of different explanations for what I had gathered through piecing together the clues of the book. If only the final pages could have been deleted.
June 9, 2025
Excellent.
July 8, 2019
Touching and informative.
September 2, 2019
The type of book that breaks your heart into little pieces. The type of book that leaves you in pain. The type of book that all of us should read at least once a year. Thank you to the author.
October 11, 2019
‘She thought what a relief it would be to make a big bonfire and burn all this paper. Reading her file destroyed the past and poisoned the present. It was the Stasi’s language that did this. It distorted reality as she remembered it and covered it in dirt until she herself felt dirtied.’
I am of an age to remember East and West Germany in the Olympic Games and the stories of people trying to flee and cross over from one to the other. I remember the momentous occasion that was the fall of the Berlin Wall. From all of my reading, not often have I come across fictional stories that deal with this time. ‘Confession with Blue Horses’ is a highly engaging story set in different time periods, of one such family and the reasons and consequences - short and long term - of their life in the East and then later.
It was eye opening to read of the experiences of living in a country where you felt that your every move was being watched. That seemingly those closest to you could, knowingly or otherwise, turn traitor and betray you. Whilst the Valentin family had a fairly reasonable standard of living, it was interesting to learn of how the stifling restrictions of the government impinged upon the three generations and how each dealt with it.
Interspersed throughout is a later timeline of when the children, now adults, are living in London. How the daughter, Ella, is still drawn to the events of childhood and returns to Berlin to haplessly search the archives of the old GDR to look for any clues or answers to the events that had unfolded for her family. It is here that the book truly shines as the research undertaken brings to light many issues, including how the East German government removed children from families who did not support the party line.
I was fully engaged with the heartbreaking story presented by Sophie. She genuinely captures multiple viewpoints and captures the voices from children to grandparents throughout this experience. Her writing is so insightful as to present the facts in such a way that you truly question and wonder how differing reactions could be to such a monumental, life changing occurrence.
If you enjoy good historical fiction and desire a window into the life of East Berliners before and after the fall of the wall, you will surely appreciate everything that is, ‘Confession with Blue Horses’.
‘All their sacrifices would be worth it in the end. Were they, Mama? Was it all worth it in the end?’
This review is based on a complimentary copy from the publisher and provided through NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. The quoted material may have changed in the final release.
I am of an age to remember East and West Germany in the Olympic Games and the stories of people trying to flee and cross over from one to the other. I remember the momentous occasion that was the fall of the Berlin Wall. From all of my reading, not often have I come across fictional stories that deal with this time. ‘Confession with Blue Horses’ is a highly engaging story set in different time periods, of one such family and the reasons and consequences - short and long term - of their life in the East and then later.
It was eye opening to read of the experiences of living in a country where you felt that your every move was being watched. That seemingly those closest to you could, knowingly or otherwise, turn traitor and betray you. Whilst the Valentin family had a fairly reasonable standard of living, it was interesting to learn of how the stifling restrictions of the government impinged upon the three generations and how each dealt with it.
Interspersed throughout is a later timeline of when the children, now adults, are living in London. How the daughter, Ella, is still drawn to the events of childhood and returns to Berlin to haplessly search the archives of the old GDR to look for any clues or answers to the events that had unfolded for her family. It is here that the book truly shines as the research undertaken brings to light many issues, including how the East German government removed children from families who did not support the party line.
I was fully engaged with the heartbreaking story presented by Sophie. She genuinely captures multiple viewpoints and captures the voices from children to grandparents throughout this experience. Her writing is so insightful as to present the facts in such a way that you truly question and wonder how differing reactions could be to such a monumental, life changing occurrence.
If you enjoy good historical fiction and desire a window into the life of East Berliners before and after the fall of the wall, you will surely appreciate everything that is, ‘Confession with Blue Horses’.
‘All their sacrifices would be worth it in the end. Were they, Mama? Was it all worth it in the end?’
This review is based on a complimentary copy from the publisher and provided through NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. The quoted material may have changed in the final release.
December 6, 2020
Of all the books I read in 2020, "Confession with Blue Horses" is one that touched me the most.
In 2010, Ella Valentin is living in London on a dilapidated boat, so cold and damp that she sleeps with a hat on. To earn a living, Ella-an art school graduate-cleans an investment bank at night. One day she receives a package of art books that her mother once owned, which sets her off on a journey to what was once East Berlin, looking for the brother who was "disappeared" in 1987 during an ill-fated, desperate attempt by her family to escape East Germany before the fall of the Berlin Wall.
Author Sophie Hardach creates an indelible portrait of Communist East Germany, complete with informers and secret police and long lines to buy trousers when there are none left. Most moving is the portrait of Ella's grandmother, Oma, once imprisoned in Buchenwald for opposing Hitler.
Oma and her friends "formed a little aristocracy, so it seemed to me at the time, these men and women who had proved their worth in the fight against Hitler. But there was also something lonely about them, or perhaps I see this only now, how mistrustful they must have been of the people around us, the same people who in the old days hounded them. They gathered around the samovar in Oma's living room, warmed their hands on delicate painted tea glasses and talked about Gorky and Lenin, about pickled mushrooms and the melting snow in Moscow."
As the reader follows Ella to Berlin, little pieces of her story and that of her family leak out, slowly, as she tries to discover her brother's fate. Hardach writes beautifully and evocatively of Ella's journey, which is also one of self-discovery.
As I read this compelling novel, I found it impossible not to think of other children who have been "lost," deliberately, in the past few years, separated on US southern border from their parents fleeing Central American countries of Honduras, Guatemala, and El Salvador, desperately seeking asylum from spiraling gang violence and climate change.
In October 2020, The New York Times reported that more than 5,500 children in total had been separated from their parents at the U.S. border under the Trump administration. The parents of at least 545 children separated at the border still haven’t been found.
In 2010, Ella Valentin is living in London on a dilapidated boat, so cold and damp that she sleeps with a hat on. To earn a living, Ella-an art school graduate-cleans an investment bank at night. One day she receives a package of art books that her mother once owned, which sets her off on a journey to what was once East Berlin, looking for the brother who was "disappeared" in 1987 during an ill-fated, desperate attempt by her family to escape East Germany before the fall of the Berlin Wall.
Author Sophie Hardach creates an indelible portrait of Communist East Germany, complete with informers and secret police and long lines to buy trousers when there are none left. Most moving is the portrait of Ella's grandmother, Oma, once imprisoned in Buchenwald for opposing Hitler.
Oma and her friends "formed a little aristocracy, so it seemed to me at the time, these men and women who had proved their worth in the fight against Hitler. But there was also something lonely about them, or perhaps I see this only now, how mistrustful they must have been of the people around us, the same people who in the old days hounded them. They gathered around the samovar in Oma's living room, warmed their hands on delicate painted tea glasses and talked about Gorky and Lenin, about pickled mushrooms and the melting snow in Moscow."
As the reader follows Ella to Berlin, little pieces of her story and that of her family leak out, slowly, as she tries to discover her brother's fate. Hardach writes beautifully and evocatively of Ella's journey, which is also one of self-discovery.
As I read this compelling novel, I found it impossible not to think of other children who have been "lost," deliberately, in the past few years, separated on US southern border from their parents fleeing Central American countries of Honduras, Guatemala, and El Salvador, desperately seeking asylum from spiraling gang violence and climate change.
In October 2020, The New York Times reported that more than 5,500 children in total had been separated from their parents at the U.S. border under the Trump administration. The parents of at least 545 children separated at the border still haven’t been found.
December 16, 2019
I can be a sucker for covers like this - with a photograph (particularly of a person) instead of an illustration. Then @louise_ohalloran convinced me to buy it on #loveyourbookshopday.
It's a story about East Germany in the mid-late 80s, and the aftermath of the GDR and the fall of the Berlin wall for just one family. It is well-paced, has an element of mystery and is not particularly complex with language or plot. The story switches between the protagonist, Ella, as a child in East Germany in the late 80s and her adult life in 2010, and also includes some chapters set in a Stasi archive where an intern trying to help Ella piece her past together.
I just finished it and I really liked it. If you are interested in reading about life in East Germany (for example, if you liked Stasiland but would rather read something similar but fictionalized and somewhat 'simpler') or stories with a bit of a family mystery, you'd probably like it too! 3.75 stars (so specific haha!)
It's a story about East Germany in the mid-late 80s, and the aftermath of the GDR and the fall of the Berlin wall for just one family. It is well-paced, has an element of mystery and is not particularly complex with language or plot. The story switches between the protagonist, Ella, as a child in East Germany in the late 80s and her adult life in 2010, and also includes some chapters set in a Stasi archive where an intern trying to help Ella piece her past together.
I just finished it and I really liked it. If you are interested in reading about life in East Germany (for example, if you liked Stasiland but would rather read something similar but fictionalized and somewhat 'simpler') or stories with a bit of a family mystery, you'd probably like it too! 3.75 stars (so specific haha!)
August 17, 2020
This is the story of an East German family torn apart by the parents' decision to try to escape East Germany in 1987, two years before the wall came down. You know that they failed from the start, set in the present in London where two of the children are now living. The novel tells the story from Ella's point of view, both in the present when she sets off to Berlin to try to find out what really happened after they were caught on the border, and in the past as a child growing up in East Berlin. It's interwoven with the story of Aaron, doing an internship at the old Stasi archives, piecing together shredded reports from the Stasi era. Together they start to piece together the story of Ella's family. I found it fascinating, moving and convincing. The author was born in West Germany, but was brought up and lives in England.
January 18, 2020
Ik heb echt genoten van dit boek. Een jonge, van oorsprong Oost-Duitse vrouw gaat naar Berlijn om uit te zoeken wat er destijds met haar jongste broertje gebeurd is. Het gezin probeerde naar het westen te vluchten en daarbij is het jongetje verdwenen.
Het boek geeft zo'n mooi beeld van hoe het was om in Oost-Duitsland op te groeien, en ook hoe het was om al die ingedramde zekerheden te zien verdampen na de eenwording. Ik heb er veel van geleerd, en het verhaal is gewoon heel mooi en ontroerend. De zoektocht verandert de hoofdpersoon ook echt, er staat iets op het spel.
Het boek geeft zo'n mooi beeld van hoe het was om in Oost-Duitsland op te groeien, en ook hoe het was om al die ingedramde zekerheden te zien verdampen na de eenwording. Ik heb er veel van geleerd, en het verhaal is gewoon heel mooi en ontroerend. De zoektocht verandert de hoofdpersoon ook echt, er staat iets op het spel.
April 17, 2020
I was there when the Berlin Wall came and travelled into the old East Berlin. The broken down dirty buildings and bullet holes everywhere were shocking.
This book takes us through the experience of one family loving in East Berlin when the wall was built to when it came down, and on into 2010 when the family were still coping with events over those years. Especially looking for a brother, who had been taken from their family and adopted out by the authorities when he was 2 years old.
This book takes us through the experience of one family loving in East Berlin when the wall was built to when it came down, and on into 2010 when the family were still coping with events over those years. Especially looking for a brother, who had been taken from their family and adopted out by the authorities when he was 2 years old.
December 11, 2019
"So many books about the Stasi..." says the narrator at one point, and I'm afraid that is what i felt about this. I remember the vivid impact of Stasiland, fifteen years ago, and this year Anna at the National Theatre was a gripping dramatisation of the culture of spying and betrayal we now associate with the GDR. This was a reasonable story but not a new perspective.
January 7, 2021
Confession with Blues Horses follows a family's struggle to leave East Berlin during the rise and fall of the Berlin Wall. A look at family separation, trauma, confinement and a family in crisis unfolds with the most elegant writing. This gentle writing style led to an effortless reading experience, kept me turning the pages and left me with a fascinating glimpse of East Berlin.
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