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I'm Absolutely Fine!: A Manual for Imperfect Women

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'I'm absolutely fine but I slightly need to pee, I followed the road less travelled and now I don't know where the hell I am, I may bleed to death shaving my legs, my soul aches, another week has ended without me becoming accidentally rich, I just put my keys in the fridge, unexpected object in the bagging area, I'll have a café mocha vodka Valium latte to go please, where's my phone? My anxieties have anxieties, no... not like that - here, I'll do it, do I have to do everything? WTF?'

Is it just me? We gnaw on that, don't we? Is it just me? Well, look around. Look at the rage, the resolution, the 'hear me roar', the panic, the power, the chin hairs, the shame, the empathy, the conversation, the sheer potential.

Welcome to Midulthood. A place where we recognise that we are all more alike than we are unalike. Of course it's not just you. If we're not in it together, we're not in it at all...

From sex (What Could Possibly Go Wrong) to self-image (Does This Straightjacket Make Me Look Fat?), I'm Absolutely Fine is a wry look at real life, real wisdom and real information framed in fun.

256 pages, Hardcover

First published September 6, 2018

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547 people want to read

About the author

Annabel Rivkin

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5 stars
80 (19%)
4 stars
117 (28%)
3 stars
111 (27%)
2 stars
66 (16%)
1 star
33 (8%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 62 reviews
Profile Image for Kirsty ❤️.
923 reviews57 followers
October 26, 2020
This book seems to have polarised people on Goodreads. I think I'm probably falling on the more negative side. It felt a bit frantic in many parts and I struggled reading it. I did like that it is a book finally aimed at my age range and it is't too long. I've probably felt a lot of things the book mentioned but overall not one I particularly enjoyed reading.
Profile Image for Natalie  all_books_great_and_small .
3,141 reviews170 followers
May 6, 2020
I received an advance reader copy of this book to read in exchange for an honest review via netgalley and the publishers.

This book made me laugh so much! I loved it! So relatable and something to cheer your day up with as well as making you realise your not alone and are not the only one.
I couldn't stop reading this, it really made me giggle (maybe a little too much at times).
Profile Image for Falynn - the TyGrammarSaurus Rex.
458 reviews
February 25, 2019
This is a bit of an odd book. I'm not sure "manual" is quite the right term. There was nothing really here about what to do or how to live your life. But I found the stories told very relateable, even though I think I am a little younger than the target audience, and sometimes it is nice just to know that you are not alone, that other people are struggling too in the same way you are, that we are all imperfect together.

I did enjoy reading it, but I was left wondering quite what the point of the book was. Other than that sense of companionship, it didn't seem to offer anything else to the reader - any suggestion or plan or, well, anything. I finished the book with rather a feeling of "And?".
Profile Image for Josephine Porter.
10 reviews
April 21, 2019
A bit of a strange book. I begun it thinking I would be able to empathise/relate to the themes but quickly realised that I am no way near as neurotic as the authors. Gave it a 2 as there were a few times that I laughed out loud and also because it made me realise that I am actually quite sane and doing OK compared to the authors of this book.
57 reviews
November 17, 2018
A must read!!!

Absolutely amazing! Hilarious, sad, and downright true the whole sorry lot of it!! A manual for women everywhere and to be honest men should read this too! Enlightening, thought provoking, fascinating. Can't wait to read it again
2 reviews
January 2, 2019
Great book, very funny and a great way to start 2019
Profile Image for Helen Palmer.
96 reviews1 follower
April 25, 2019
I don't really know what I thought I was getting when I bought this book. There's some things that made me smile and I could relate to, but it was just a long list of what's wrong with life rather than celebrating it. Struggles to finish this one.
Profile Image for Lucy-Bookworm.
767 reviews16 followers
June 13, 2019
I'm not really sure what this book was meant to be but as it was described as "A genius book. So funny, so wise, so cool and above all so USEFUL", I was expecting it to be funny, wise, useful.
It wasn't.
I cannot see how anyone could describe the book as useful, and the few moments of humour or observation that did exist were completely over shadowed by stereotypical snippets about "middle aged women" & peppered with crude language.
I suppose somebody somewhere would find it funny, but certainly not me! I am just grateful that a) I didn't pay for this book & b) it was relatively short so I didn't waste too much time on it ...

Disclosure: I received a copy of this book free from NetGalley, all opinions are my own.
Profile Image for Ria.
66 reviews1 follower
January 18, 2025
I literally couldn't stop laughing all the way through this!
I felt like the author was a fly on the wall watching my life, she speaks so much truth in this wonderfully funny book.
Life isn't so bad when you know everyone else is in the same boat!
Profile Image for SadieReadsAgain.
479 reviews39 followers
August 24, 2020
This book is written by the presenters of a podcast I used to listen to, of the same name. As a woman in my mid 30's, I was excited about the podcast, expecting women in middle age talking the real talk about the time in life that I'm fast approaching. However, the podcast didn't really deliver as there was a lot of talk about beauty products...of which I couldn't be less interested, and frankly couldn't afford. However, this book is far more what I'd hoped the podcast to be. It is still touched with the privilege that is prevalent in the podcast - so, middle class middle age - but is far more relatable and much broader in terms of the experiences it discusses.

No one person will find that everything in this book will resonate with them, but that's ok. We're all different, and it's written by two different women. I don't think that should be a negative. I think it's exciting that this time in a woman's life is being given some air time in a frank, funny and honest way. No excuses, no euphemisms, just straight talk with equal parts snark and heart.

This book isn't particularly deep, and I think I was looking for a bit more connection with the authors. As it is, I couldn't tell you which author wrote which part or really anything about either of them, as their voices weren't very distinct and the writing didn't get into anything specifically personal. Obviously that's their right as to how much they share, but I was hoping for something a bit more.

I received a NetGalley copy of this book from Octopus Publishing, Cassell in return for a review. All opinions are my own.
Profile Image for miss.mesmerized mesmerized.
1,405 reviews42 followers
June 13, 2019
The founders of the webpage “themidult.com“, journalists and friends, have decided to spread their word also in print. Their look at women in the middle of their adulthood – thanks to experience now a lot more realistic than in their twenties, but also at a point where everyday stress and responsibilities often keep them from doing what they really want to do – is often funny, highly entertaining and most of all simply true. There is no need anymore to embellish anything, life is what it is when you have celebrated your fortieth birthday, yet, things aren’t too bad either.

I was quite astonished when reading the book by the sheer range of topics they address. From the job situation to motherhood, aches here and there and the question of finding the perfect – or at least a fitting partner – at that age, or simply not wanting to find one. All the memories and experiences you gathered, the mistakes you made, those you regret and other you are grateful for, dieting and getting finally rid of society’s dictation of how you have to look. Masses of lists not to be taken too seriously and more than once the realisation that they are talking about you.

It’s not a manual about how to live and what to do. It is much more a kind of inventory control of where women at that age are in life and the message is obvious (since it is already clearly visible in the subtitle): we are imperfect, but that’s ok. Written in a very light-hearted and joyful tone, a book that I thoroughly enjoyed.
Profile Image for Katherine Hayward Pérez .
1,680 reviews77 followers
May 25, 2019
The book has an interesting title and a nice cover. I had some problems with it though as I am a user of assistive technology. I found, that as a protected PDF and not a Kindle ebook, it was not compatible with VoiceOver on my iPad and I thought it would be. I had a bit of a time finding an app to open it and finally found Digital Editions but this app does not work with VoiceOver either.

I finally got the book read out to me and after all that did not enjoy it much. Hard to get into, there was a lot of info dumping going on and the language used was going for an informal style yet I felt distanced from it at times and like the pace dragged and waffled.

The section structure makes it the kind of book to be dipped in and out of and I felt that, despite having been written by 40 year olds it was dull and childish in some parts.

I expected to learn something or come away with some useful life advice but I was disappointed. I did not know what the authors were trying to do or show. Very few books fail to grip me and unfortunately this was one of those.

Thanks to Annabel Rivkin and publisher for my ARC in exchange for an honest and voluntary review.

2 stars.
Profile Image for Paula.
52 reviews1 follower
June 1, 2020
Firstly I get that this book will not be for everyone, the writers basically say the same in the introduction but it was definitely my kind of read.
The book is a collection of essays, lists, pieces of advice for “Midults” like myself. I found it witty and mostly relatable. A lot of the book for me was “omg I do that” and “that is so true” I could see an awful lot of myself in there. Some parts I didn’t quite relate to and didn’t find the same humour in them, which was to be expected.
I quite enjoyed the chaotic formula of the book, I liked the layout being a mix of paragraphs and lists , it made it a quick and easy read.
This lighthearted and fun manual is a definite success in my eyes but I can understand why some may have struggled to enjoy.
23 reviews
May 16, 2021
Ovo je jedna od ukupno 2 knjige koje nisam imala želju da dovršim u mom dosadašnjem životu. Možda zato što ipak ne spadam u ciljnu grupu ove knjige, ali meni ova knjiga nije imala nikakvog smisla niti sam videla bilo kakvu korist od njenog čitanja. Niti je zabavna niti poučna, a neke rečenice su bile tako čudne da sam morala više puta da ih čitam da bih shvatila poentu. Na kraju, rekla bih da postoje 2 stvari koje morate znati o ovoj knjizi pre nego što krenete da je čitate:
1. Ovo nije nikakav priručnik.
2. Jedino što možete da naučite iz ove knjige je da neke stvari ne radite samo vi, npr. računanje da li imate vremena da odete do toaleta dok kuvate vodu za čaj.
Profile Image for Rhian.
34 reviews1 follower
November 27, 2022
What made me want to read this book, in all honesty, was the full title.
I’m Absolutely Fine!: A Manual for Imperfect Women. Being an imperfect woman myself I had to know what this book held in store. Now while the book is clever and funny and there are moments where it feels like the authors are inside my brain and speaking directly to my own insecurities and worries etc I do however think that for me personally (as a childless millennial) I may not quite be the target audience but I did enjoy this book. This book feels like one I should hang on to until I’m a little bit older and then it may appeal to me more. That being said it is an interesting look at what it means to be a woman.
Profile Image for Jo Weston.
441 reviews20 followers
September 29, 2018
I was a bit up and down with this book - there’s this assumption that everyone is a bit imperfect (yes, we all are) but that this then automatically means we are all in therapy. It’s written by two 40- something ladies who at times are behaving and living like they’re in their mid twenties. Really??? It can be rather OTT.

Overall though there were some great gems and observation this so it’s a 3.5-4 star read for me.

And thank god it was in a different league to the utterly inane “Why Mummy Drinks”!!
1 review
January 18, 2020
Not so much a manual of advice more just a load of lists acknowledging common feelings. traits and foibles. Reassuring in that we share many. Although relieved it wasn’t chock full of parenting and child related issues I was seriously surprised at the inference that there aren’t many deliberately child free women around. They only know two? I know many happily childfree women of all ages who made the decisions based on preference and definately not on inability or lack of a husband. Almost as many as those who close to have children. That said, the rest was a lighthearted enjoyable read.
Profile Image for Bookwormbadger.
553 reviews
October 17, 2019
Many thanks to Netgalley and Octopus Publishing for my copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
This book is essentially a humorous life survival guide for over 40s women. It features tongue in cheek advice on relationships, lifestyle and more.
I found it to be a bit so-so; funny in parts, irrelevant / boring / navel-gazing in others.
I enjoy both non-fiction and self-help books but this was far from the best book I've read this year.
2.5 stars but I'll round it up to 3.
12 reviews
January 17, 2021
Quite disappointed with this book and wouldn’t recommend. I didn’t find it very funny nor was it a manual. There were a few small relatable parts but I felt like I was waiting for more to come along that I could resonate with but I couldn’t. I felt like it was saying all women are a bit nuts, we all take meds and end up in therapy. It honestly felt like just lots of random sentences. All a bit bizarre.
2 reviews
March 29, 2019
Wonderful

I'm a middle-aged woman. I guess. This book made me laugh out loud and relate to so many of the scenarios. I'm a wife and mother and came of age in the 90's so am feeling it. nb I not only shagged the IT guy, I married that mofo. Fantastic book and a real tonic. Ladies you are brilliant!
Profile Image for Emma.
100 reviews4 followers
November 11, 2019
This is an unusual book - while they are chapters, they also seem like individual essays/lists lumped together under one heading. That's not to say that I didn't enjoy this book - I did, and although slightly too young to be a midult, I still found lots of parts laugh out loud funny. Would recommend to those who don't read a lot and want a book they can put down and pick up again weeks later.
Profile Image for Asera.
88 reviews5 followers
May 28, 2020
= Read this book from NetGalley UK in exchange for a fair review. =

DNF

I don’t really know what to make of this book. Calling it a manual was what attracted me to check out this title but it’s a collection of relatable stories besides the accompanying rants.

It lost me after Chapter 1. Leaving me with much more question marks and what’s the point of this book?

1 star
1 review
January 31, 2021
Don't come to the book looking to improve yourself or come out with a new life goals; treat it as a friend you haven't had, the one who keeps quiet but absolutely reflects on your challenges. Not all relevant but absolutely relatable in many aspects. The structure made it none comital which is just perfect for the hectic lives of the midadult reader...
Profile Image for Lisa Green.
156 reviews5 followers
February 27, 2021
Polarising. Parts of this book were comedy gold and enjoyable, other parts completely unrelatable, privileged & pretentious. With plenty of average bits in the middle. Consequently, its taken me an age to read and it felt quite the burden at times. I'm sure it will be perfect for some, but it is not my cup of tea.
11 reviews
March 26, 2024
Not just for Women.
This book is glorious. I laughed out loud, shed some tears and learnt a lot - as a man and as a coach. I use quotes from this book in seminars on Imposter Syndrome. On cold dark winter days I re-skim the book to bring laughter and warmth to my heart. A perfect gift. Thank-you Annabel and Emilie. Peter
Profile Image for Claire Warby.
35 reviews
December 15, 2018
Why? Why did I buy this? If you really want to give this book a try, see if your library has it. Honestly, don't waste your cash. It's not funny, rather childish in places. I can't quite grasp the point of this book other than to make it seem like all females are inept, paranoid and utter baffoons.
Profile Image for Lozzy Lozbuds.
73 reviews3 followers
June 21, 2019
I liked the premise of this book, because as an unmarried woman of 35 with no kids, sometimes you feel that you're out there on your own a little bit! However, I think that 250 pages could have been condensed into less than 200, but overall it was a good, funny, entertaining, relatable read.
Profile Image for Charlie Allison.
422 reviews2 followers
July 6, 2019
Brilliant hugely funny read. Only criticism was them pointedly refusing to include any children or parenting bits, and yet lots on dating in your 40s. What a shame as it made it. Less relevant to their key majority audience,
Displaying 1 - 30 of 62 reviews

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