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The Elephant in the Room: One Fat Man's Quest to Get Smaller in a Growing America
ONE OF NPR’S BEST BOOKS OF 2019
The Elephant in the Room is a memoir chronicling what it’s like to live in today’s world as a fat man, from acclaimed journalist Tommy Tomlinson, who, as he neared the age of fifty, weighed 460 pounds and decided he had to change his life.
When he was almost fifty years old, Tommy Tomlinson weighed an astonishing—and dangerous—460 pounds, at risk for heart disease, diabetes, and stroke, unable to climb a flight of stairs without having to catch his breath, or travel on an airplane without buying two seats. Raised in a family that loved food, he had been aware of the problem for years, seeing doctors and trying diets from the time he was a preteen. But nothing worked, and every time he tried to make a change, it didn’t go the way he planned—in fact, he wasn’t sure that he really wanted to change.
In The Elephant in the Room, Tomlinson chronicles his lifelong battle with weight in a voice that combines the urgency of Roxane Gay’s Hunger with the intimacy of Rick Bragg’s All Over but the Shoutin’. He also hits the road to meet other members of the plus-sized tribe in an attempt to understand how, as a nation, we got to this point. From buying a Fitbit and setting exercise goals to contemplating the Heart Attack Grill in Las Vegas, America’s “capital of food porn,” and modifying his own diet, Tomlinson brings us along on a candid and sometimes brutal look at the everyday experience of being constantly aware of your size. Over the course of the book, he confronts these issues head-on and chronicles the practical steps he has to take to lose weight by the end.
The Elephant in the Room is a memoir chronicling what it’s like to live in today’s world as a fat man, from acclaimed journalist Tommy Tomlinson, who, as he neared the age of fifty, weighed 460 pounds and decided he had to change his life.
When he was almost fifty years old, Tommy Tomlinson weighed an astonishing—and dangerous—460 pounds, at risk for heart disease, diabetes, and stroke, unable to climb a flight of stairs without having to catch his breath, or travel on an airplane without buying two seats. Raised in a family that loved food, he had been aware of the problem for years, seeing doctors and trying diets from the time he was a preteen. But nothing worked, and every time he tried to make a change, it didn’t go the way he planned—in fact, he wasn’t sure that he really wanted to change.
In The Elephant in the Room, Tomlinson chronicles his lifelong battle with weight in a voice that combines the urgency of Roxane Gay’s Hunger with the intimacy of Rick Bragg’s All Over but the Shoutin’. He also hits the road to meet other members of the plus-sized tribe in an attempt to understand how, as a nation, we got to this point. From buying a Fitbit and setting exercise goals to contemplating the Heart Attack Grill in Las Vegas, America’s “capital of food porn,” and modifying his own diet, Tomlinson brings us along on a candid and sometimes brutal look at the everyday experience of being constantly aware of your size. Over the course of the book, he confronts these issues head-on and chronicles the practical steps he has to take to lose weight by the end.
257 pages, Kindle Edition
First published January 15, 2019
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4789 people want to read
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February 17, 2019
The Elephant in the Room was recommended by my Goodreads friend, Dita. I knew once I read her thoughts I had to read this book, too.
Tommy Tomlinson is candid and authentic in his memoir about his weight loss challenges. He shares his weight of 460 pounds and the health difficulties that go along with that.
Tommy grows up in a family where love for food is number one, and he’s had many doctors talk to him about his weight over the years. He has tried every gimmick and diet, and nothing seemed to work for him, but he also recognizes that he wasn’t sure he was ready for a change.
Tommy chronicles his life as he begins to change his mindset, seeking comfort from others in the same shoes.
From the start, I connected with Tommy’s honesty. He felt real and I was cheering him on his journey all along the way. Tommy puts his whole self out there for the world to see, good and bad, and he does everything within his power to to gain control over his choices and to work towards a healthier life. It’s just the kind of inspirational read I needed. If you could use some inspiration, too, or if you enjoy a well-written, original, deeply affecting memoir, take a look at The Elephant in the Room.
I received a complimentary copy. All opinions are my own.
My reviews can also be found on my blog: www.jennifertarheelreader.com
Tommy Tomlinson is candid and authentic in his memoir about his weight loss challenges. He shares his weight of 460 pounds and the health difficulties that go along with that.
Tommy grows up in a family where love for food is number one, and he’s had many doctors talk to him about his weight over the years. He has tried every gimmick and diet, and nothing seemed to work for him, but he also recognizes that he wasn’t sure he was ready for a change.
Tommy chronicles his life as he begins to change his mindset, seeking comfort from others in the same shoes.
From the start, I connected with Tommy’s honesty. He felt real and I was cheering him on his journey all along the way. Tommy puts his whole self out there for the world to see, good and bad, and he does everything within his power to to gain control over his choices and to work towards a healthier life. It’s just the kind of inspirational read I needed. If you could use some inspiration, too, or if you enjoy a well-written, original, deeply affecting memoir, take a look at The Elephant in the Room.
I received a complimentary copy. All opinions are my own.
My reviews can also be found on my blog: www.jennifertarheelreader.com
September 6, 2023
Well-done Mr. Tomlinson. I know you struggle with feelings of being “less-than” due to your weight, but after reading your book I can tell that you are a fine human being, and if I knew you in real life, you’re someone I would like to call a friend.
Recommended by Meredith on the ‘Currently Reading’ podcast as well as Annie on ‘From the Front Porch’ podcast, I picked this up on audio and listened to it in one day. I absolutely loved it. The author is smart, articulate, and can tell a heck of a good story.
Despite the title, this is not a diet book. It’s a candid look at what it was like to be an overweight kid and what it is like, physically and emotionally, to weigh over 400 pounds as a middle-aged man. The author dives deep into the underlying emotions and causes of his food addiction.
Interspersed among the chapters are glimpses into his life: his childhood and college years, his career as a journalist, meeting and marrying his wife, growing up poor in the South, and much more.
He isn’t self-pitying, nor is he ‘fat and proud of it’. What he is, is brutally honest with himself and with his readers. I fell in love with his family and I cried with him as he suffered unbearable losses.
Whether you struggle with your weight or not, pick up this book and read it. It will be a book that either speaks your truth or it will be a book that gives you a glimpse into a life that is foreign to you. Either way, I think it will be a book where your heart grows just a little larger in empathy for people who suffer from addictions, food or otherwise.
This is memoir at its best and I highly recommend listening to it in the author’s own voice. He is making changes to get healthier and I, for one, am cheering him on.
Recommended by Meredith on the ‘Currently Reading’ podcast as well as Annie on ‘From the Front Porch’ podcast, I picked this up on audio and listened to it in one day. I absolutely loved it. The author is smart, articulate, and can tell a heck of a good story.
Despite the title, this is not a diet book. It’s a candid look at what it was like to be an overweight kid and what it is like, physically and emotionally, to weigh over 400 pounds as a middle-aged man. The author dives deep into the underlying emotions and causes of his food addiction.
Interspersed among the chapters are glimpses into his life: his childhood and college years, his career as a journalist, meeting and marrying his wife, growing up poor in the South, and much more.
He isn’t self-pitying, nor is he ‘fat and proud of it’. What he is, is brutally honest with himself and with his readers. I fell in love with his family and I cried with him as he suffered unbearable losses.
Whether you struggle with your weight or not, pick up this book and read it. It will be a book that either speaks your truth or it will be a book that gives you a glimpse into a life that is foreign to you. Either way, I think it will be a book where your heart grows just a little larger in empathy for people who suffer from addictions, food or otherwise.
This is memoir at its best and I highly recommend listening to it in the author’s own voice. He is making changes to get healthier and I, for one, am cheering him on.
June 18, 2019
The Elephant in the Room: One Fat Man’s Quest to get Smaller in a Growing America is an honest account of Tommy Tomlinson’s pursuit to lose weight - and keep it off.
Tomlinson weighed 460 pounds at the time he wrote this deeply personal memoir. He shares details about his childhood and the way he grew up (in a Southern family with constant comfort food), his general relationship with food - then and now, his struggles with both dieting and exercise, his regrets, and how his weight has impacted several areas of his life, including health, everyday activities, and personal relationships. He’s a journalist, a husband, close with his family, and seems like a genuinely good person.
What I appreciated about The Elephant in the Room, is Tomlinson’s authenticity and accountability. He doesn’t make excuses and he also doesn’t pretend it’s easy. He binges on fast food because it’s there, it’s convenient, and it’s tasty. He doesn’t hide his actions or try to spin things. The truth is prevalent.
While I haven’t struggled with this particular challenge, I of course, found some of the trials relatable. The following quote, specifically, stood out to me, as this is a feeling we’ve all likely experienced at some point or another:
”Most of us are lucky enough that we don’t have to face life or death every day - the commute to work no longer involves bears trying to eat us. So those old useful fears spread into places they don’t belong. They morph into anxieties and superstitions and phobias. Instead of just keeping us alive, they keep us from being our best.”
I enjoyed Tomlinson’s portrayal of his weight loss journey and appreciated the candid style he maintained throughout the book. I would recommend The Elephant in the Room to everyone, whether you’re struggling with the same challenges or not. We all go through things at different times and it can be reassuring to know we’re not alone, even when you feel outcast or isolated by your own circumstances.
Tomlinson weighed 460 pounds at the time he wrote this deeply personal memoir. He shares details about his childhood and the way he grew up (in a Southern family with constant comfort food), his general relationship with food - then and now, his struggles with both dieting and exercise, his regrets, and how his weight has impacted several areas of his life, including health, everyday activities, and personal relationships. He’s a journalist, a husband, close with his family, and seems like a genuinely good person.
What I appreciated about The Elephant in the Room, is Tomlinson’s authenticity and accountability. He doesn’t make excuses and he also doesn’t pretend it’s easy. He binges on fast food because it’s there, it’s convenient, and it’s tasty. He doesn’t hide his actions or try to spin things. The truth is prevalent.
While I haven’t struggled with this particular challenge, I of course, found some of the trials relatable. The following quote, specifically, stood out to me, as this is a feeling we’ve all likely experienced at some point or another:
”Most of us are lucky enough that we don’t have to face life or death every day - the commute to work no longer involves bears trying to eat us. So those old useful fears spread into places they don’t belong. They morph into anxieties and superstitions and phobias. Instead of just keeping us alive, they keep us from being our best.”
I enjoyed Tomlinson’s portrayal of his weight loss journey and appreciated the candid style he maintained throughout the book. I would recommend The Elephant in the Room to everyone, whether you’re struggling with the same challenges or not. We all go through things at different times and it can be reassuring to know we’re not alone, even when you feel outcast or isolated by your own circumstances.
November 2, 2018
Elephant in the Room is journalist Tommy Tomlinson’s memoir of growing up fat and how, as an adult, he got to 460 pounds. He had a wife who loved him and a successful career, but the allure of fast food and vending machine or gas station junk food was a siren song so strong, he had to give up doing the sports he loved and many other things in favor of eating a spectacular amount of crap.
At times funny, at times repetitive, anyone who has ever struggled with his/her weight or another addiction will identify with his constant battle. Many of us have begun exercise programs, started feeling great—sleeping better, climbing stairs without wanting to call paramedics—and quitting three weeks later anyway. I don’t recommend you read this book if you’re trying to lose or maintain your weight and fast food places are alluring to you. I’ve been a vegetarian for twenty-something years, and therefore, haven’t eaten fast food since college, so that’s not my particular albatross. (Being a 5’3” female who’d rather read a book than exercise is.) I say that because he talks ENDLESSLY about his furtive trips to Wendy’s, McDonalds, etc.
One of the things I found most interesting was when he talked about the way American businesses have had to expand things to accommodate the expanding waist lines of Americans. For example, he talks about a website discussing what to do with the corpse of your morbidly obese loved one. You’ll have to special-order a casket that can contain up to 1,000 pounds of human remains. You’ll need to buy two to three burial plots close to access roads for equipment to deliver the body. Firefighters may need to be called in. Cremation? Most crematoriums can’t accommodate really supersized cadavers.
I did enjoy this look at navigating the world in a body that he readily acknowledges he created himself. He doesn’t blame the Southern meals he grew up with meant for people who worked with their bodies all day, while he was a sedentary kid with book in hand who’d regularly eat sandwiches and Little Debbie snack cakes before a heavy fried dinner. This is not a tale of a guy who was fat and quickly loses a zillion pounds and becomes a triathlete, but of a man who is simply trying to do better with his life choices.
Thanks so much to NetGalley for the opportunity to review this nonfiction book, which RELEASES JANUARY 15, 2019.
For more reviews, please visit: http://www.theresaalan.net/blog
At times funny, at times repetitive, anyone who has ever struggled with his/her weight or another addiction will identify with his constant battle. Many of us have begun exercise programs, started feeling great—sleeping better, climbing stairs without wanting to call paramedics—and quitting three weeks later anyway. I don’t recommend you read this book if you’re trying to lose or maintain your weight and fast food places are alluring to you. I’ve been a vegetarian for twenty-something years, and therefore, haven’t eaten fast food since college, so that’s not my particular albatross. (Being a 5’3” female who’d rather read a book than exercise is.) I say that because he talks ENDLESSLY about his furtive trips to Wendy’s, McDonalds, etc.
One of the things I found most interesting was when he talked about the way American businesses have had to expand things to accommodate the expanding waist lines of Americans. For example, he talks about a website discussing what to do with the corpse of your morbidly obese loved one. You’ll have to special-order a casket that can contain up to 1,000 pounds of human remains. You’ll need to buy two to three burial plots close to access roads for equipment to deliver the body. Firefighters may need to be called in. Cremation? Most crematoriums can’t accommodate really supersized cadavers.
I did enjoy this look at navigating the world in a body that he readily acknowledges he created himself. He doesn’t blame the Southern meals he grew up with meant for people who worked with their bodies all day, while he was a sedentary kid with book in hand who’d regularly eat sandwiches and Little Debbie snack cakes before a heavy fried dinner. This is not a tale of a guy who was fat and quickly loses a zillion pounds and becomes a triathlete, but of a man who is simply trying to do better with his life choices.
Thanks so much to NetGalley for the opportunity to review this nonfiction book, which RELEASES JANUARY 15, 2019.
For more reviews, please visit: http://www.theresaalan.net/blog
November 16, 2018
Tommy Tomlinson is a writer. Wow, is he ever. His background as a reporter for over 20 years and as a writer for ESPN, Esquire, Garden and Gun and other publications has fine-tuned the writing skills that I believe he was probably born with. He knew how to grab me and keep me interested in his story from the first page all the way throughout the book.
His story? Living as a morbidly obese person for almost his entire life. As someone who has struggled with weight issues myself, I ate up this book as if it was a box of hot, fresh, Krispy Kreme donuts. Although I've never weighed nearly as much as Tommy, who reached 460 pounds, I still felt every emotion that he described. And the fact that I felt it necessary to mention that I've never weighed that much underscores the rationalization that we, the overweight, feed ourselves, along with the food we devour. Tommy Tomlinson would get it.
Never been overweight and don’t think you can relate? I beg you to read this anyway. There are laugh out loud moments and there are dampened tissue moments, but every moment is as real as it gets. Tommy writes as if he’s talking directly to the reader. He tells of his family life, his loving wife, his career, deep joy and deeper loss, and his hidden inner pain. It's all shared by a man who knows how lucky he has been in life yet also knows what he has missed and what he has caused others to miss because of his weight. But he makes it clear that although his addiction is food, there are many of us that have the same feelings deep down, whether we are addicted to drugs, alcohol, gambling or anything that holds us back from the person we hope we are inside but may be afraid to meet.
Brilliantly written and wonderfully readable, this is neither a pity-party saga nor a self-help book. It's a candid, brave story by someone who wants to do better for himself and his loved ones. I fell in love with this guy because of his honesty and his ability to share his life so openly with me, the reader.
Thank you to NetGalley and Simon & Schuster for an ARC in exchange for my honest review. 5 stars, minimum.
His story? Living as a morbidly obese person for almost his entire life. As someone who has struggled with weight issues myself, I ate up this book as if it was a box of hot, fresh, Krispy Kreme donuts. Although I've never weighed nearly as much as Tommy, who reached 460 pounds, I still felt every emotion that he described. And the fact that I felt it necessary to mention that I've never weighed that much underscores the rationalization that we, the overweight, feed ourselves, along with the food we devour. Tommy Tomlinson would get it.
Never been overweight and don’t think you can relate? I beg you to read this anyway. There are laugh out loud moments and there are dampened tissue moments, but every moment is as real as it gets. Tommy writes as if he’s talking directly to the reader. He tells of his family life, his loving wife, his career, deep joy and deeper loss, and his hidden inner pain. It's all shared by a man who knows how lucky he has been in life yet also knows what he has missed and what he has caused others to miss because of his weight. But he makes it clear that although his addiction is food, there are many of us that have the same feelings deep down, whether we are addicted to drugs, alcohol, gambling or anything that holds us back from the person we hope we are inside but may be afraid to meet.
Brilliantly written and wonderfully readable, this is neither a pity-party saga nor a self-help book. It's a candid, brave story by someone who wants to do better for himself and his loved ones. I fell in love with this guy because of his honesty and his ability to share his life so openly with me, the reader.
Thank you to NetGalley and Simon & Schuster for an ARC in exchange for my honest review. 5 stars, minimum.
February 16, 2020
I couldn’t put this one down. This is a memoir that’s partly about Tommy Tomlinson’s life as a journalist, but mostly about his struggle with food. He was over 400 pounds when he started on a path over the course of a year to work on his weight. This man can write!
There are so many things that I love about this author – his love for his wife and his incredible heart. He’s ever so open and genuine without being whiny or indulging in self-pity. He’s amiable and now that I’ve finished the book, I miss him so much.
Although I’m nowhere near Tomlinson’s weight, I have struggled with weight for most of my adult life and will struggle forever since I love food like you wouldn’t believe. I could relate to many of the challenges he described. This book is a fabulous read whether you struggle with weight or not. If you have never struggled with weight or any addiction for that matter, you probably know someone who does. This book will help you to gain insight into how hard it truly is. More than anything, it’s such an enjoyable read.
Here are some of my favorite quotes. There were so many.
“At some point we have to own our choices. If not, we’re eternally children.”
“Most of the time what I feel is sadness over how much life I’ve wasted.”
“In our fractured country, we all agree on one thing: second helpings.”
“Every fat person, and every fat person’s family, pays with anger and heartache and pain. For every one of us who can’t shed the weight, there are spouses and parents and kids and friends who grieve for us. We carve lines in their faces. We sentence them to long years alone.”
“Here are the two things I have come to believe about diets:
1. Almost any diet works in the short term. 2. Almost no diets work in the long term.”
“A diet is no good if it works for just a week or ten days or a month. It has to be something you can live with (apologies to Shakespeare) tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow.”
“Losing weight is not the hard part. The hard part is living with a diet for years, maybe the rest of your life. That’s why almost no diets work in the long run.”
“The body’s metabolism slows down as people lose weight, which means they have to eat fewer and fewer calories to keep losing. But this study showed that, for the contestants who lost weight quickly, their metabolism kept slowing even when they started gaining weight again. Basically, however fat they had been, that’s what their bodies wanted them to be.”
“Making a fundamental change of any kind is the hardest thing an adult human being can do.”
“Telling a fat person Eat less and exercise is like telling a boxer Don’t get hit. You act as if there’s not an opponent.”
“I’m almost never hungry in the physical sense. But I’m always craving an emotional high, the kind that comes from making love, or being in the crowd for great live music, or watching the sun come up over the ocean. And I’m always wanting something to counter the low, when I’m anxious about work or arguing with family or depressed for reasons I can’t understand.”
“I tell myself that a quick stroll around the block is enough exercise, and I believe it. I tell myself that the mound of peanut butter on my sandwich is just a couple teaspoons, and I believe it. I tell myself that a cheat day is just a onetime thing, and I believe it. The worst lie I tell myself, and the most powerful one, is about tomorrow. Tomorrow is the golden day. That’s the day when I’ll quit overeating and start working out and set the course for a new version of myself.”
“The surest sign of an adult is the ability to accept delayed gratification.”
“The most depressing five-word Google search I can think of—and I can think of a LOT of depressing five-word Google searches—is ‘gained all the weight back.’”
“Anthony Trollope, the nineteenth-century British writer, wrote for three hours every morning before going to his job at the post office. If he finished a book with ten minutes left in his three hours, he grabbed a blank sheet of paper and started the next book. He wrote forty-seven novels that way, plus many volumes of short stories and nonfiction. That’s how a grown-up gets it done.”
There are so many things that I love about this author – his love for his wife and his incredible heart. He’s ever so open and genuine without being whiny or indulging in self-pity. He’s amiable and now that I’ve finished the book, I miss him so much.
Although I’m nowhere near Tomlinson’s weight, I have struggled with weight for most of my adult life and will struggle forever since I love food like you wouldn’t believe. I could relate to many of the challenges he described. This book is a fabulous read whether you struggle with weight or not. If you have never struggled with weight or any addiction for that matter, you probably know someone who does. This book will help you to gain insight into how hard it truly is. More than anything, it’s such an enjoyable read.
Here are some of my favorite quotes. There were so many.
“At some point we have to own our choices. If not, we’re eternally children.”
“Most of the time what I feel is sadness over how much life I’ve wasted.”
“In our fractured country, we all agree on one thing: second helpings.”
“Every fat person, and every fat person’s family, pays with anger and heartache and pain. For every one of us who can’t shed the weight, there are spouses and parents and kids and friends who grieve for us. We carve lines in their faces. We sentence them to long years alone.”
“Here are the two things I have come to believe about diets:
1. Almost any diet works in the short term. 2. Almost no diets work in the long term.”
“A diet is no good if it works for just a week or ten days or a month. It has to be something you can live with (apologies to Shakespeare) tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow.”
“Losing weight is not the hard part. The hard part is living with a diet for years, maybe the rest of your life. That’s why almost no diets work in the long run.”
“The body’s metabolism slows down as people lose weight, which means they have to eat fewer and fewer calories to keep losing. But this study showed that, for the contestants who lost weight quickly, their metabolism kept slowing even when they started gaining weight again. Basically, however fat they had been, that’s what their bodies wanted them to be.”
“Making a fundamental change of any kind is the hardest thing an adult human being can do.”
“Telling a fat person Eat less and exercise is like telling a boxer Don’t get hit. You act as if there’s not an opponent.”
“I’m almost never hungry in the physical sense. But I’m always craving an emotional high, the kind that comes from making love, or being in the crowd for great live music, or watching the sun come up over the ocean. And I’m always wanting something to counter the low, when I’m anxious about work or arguing with family or depressed for reasons I can’t understand.”
“I tell myself that a quick stroll around the block is enough exercise, and I believe it. I tell myself that the mound of peanut butter on my sandwich is just a couple teaspoons, and I believe it. I tell myself that a cheat day is just a onetime thing, and I believe it. The worst lie I tell myself, and the most powerful one, is about tomorrow. Tomorrow is the golden day. That’s the day when I’ll quit overeating and start working out and set the course for a new version of myself.”
“The surest sign of an adult is the ability to accept delayed gratification.”
“The most depressing five-word Google search I can think of—and I can think of a LOT of depressing five-word Google searches—is ‘gained all the weight back.’”
“Anthony Trollope, the nineteenth-century British writer, wrote for three hours every morning before going to his job at the post office. If he finished a book with ten minutes left in his three hours, he grabbed a blank sheet of paper and started the next book. He wrote forty-seven novels that way, plus many volumes of short stories and nonfiction. That’s how a grown-up gets it done.”
January 3, 2019
I appreciate greatly that these kinds of stories are being told. With rates of overweight and obesity on the rise, it is well past time that voices of fat people given a microphone to reflect on their own experiences (rather than narratives imposed on them) and taken seriously beyond the usual hand wringing and moralizing that has characterized the discourse for the last 30 years. The author's candor and vulnerability are admirable and I enjoyed the specificity of his anecdotes. That said, I'm not sure this fully worked as a memoir for me. I think instead of a dual timeline, it would have been better to more fully incorporate the past elements into the current year of his weight loss. I also wish some of his insights and reflections had gone a bit deeper, as that's really the hallmark of good memoir. That said, I enjoyed spending time with the author through this book, and again, I am happy to see a more complicated and nuanced public discussion about what it means to gain and lose significant amounts of weight
February 17, 2019
Tommy Tomlinson’s The Elephant in the Room is the true-life love story between a man and his cheeseburger. And his biscuits and gravy. And his banana pudding. And something glorious called peanut butter logs. It’s the classic boy meets delicious greasy high-calorie snack story. Ultimately this passion becomes more toxic than dating Charlie Sheen. And like dating Sheen, Tomlinson’s unhealthy food relationship yields nothing but disgust and pity from friends, a myriad of embarrassing health ailments, and probably a short and painful death in the not so distance future (if things don’t change pronto).
In this obesity memoir (apparently this is a thing) Tomlinson, a generous and caring man, finds himself weighing over 450 pounds. Most chairs cannot fit (or hold him anymore). He cannot walk longer than short distances. It is a struggle to find clothes that fit. How did he get to this place? Why is he still here? The answers to these questions are remarkably mundane. His loving Southern family did not provide particularly healthy eating. He did not get enough exercise. Foods with high sugar/fat content are incredibly easy and inexpensive. And ultimately he has been eating to fill a hole caused by loneliness and unhappiness not hunger. It is the ordinariness of his story that resonates with the reader. Tomlinson is a gifted writer whose story of grappling with his weight is relatable and often funny. Like most addictions, it is easy to see obesity as a weakness or a laziness other than what it really is-a grueling and traumatic struggle. The Elephant in the Room makes this struggle approachable, sympathetic and understandable.
In this obesity memoir (apparently this is a thing) Tomlinson, a generous and caring man, finds himself weighing over 450 pounds. Most chairs cannot fit (or hold him anymore). He cannot walk longer than short distances. It is a struggle to find clothes that fit. How did he get to this place? Why is he still here? The answers to these questions are remarkably mundane. His loving Southern family did not provide particularly healthy eating. He did not get enough exercise. Foods with high sugar/fat content are incredibly easy and inexpensive. And ultimately he has been eating to fill a hole caused by loneliness and unhappiness not hunger. It is the ordinariness of his story that resonates with the reader. Tomlinson is a gifted writer whose story of grappling with his weight is relatable and often funny. Like most addictions, it is easy to see obesity as a weakness or a laziness other than what it really is-a grueling and traumatic struggle. The Elephant in the Room makes this struggle approachable, sympathetic and understandable.
October 30, 2018
Tommy Tomlinson is no stranger to body image, health issues and the realization that HE is ultimately, as an adult, responsible for his obesity . Not once did he blame his family for equating love with rich foods, or his friends or his wife or the rest of the world for his weight.
THE ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM is a sometimes humorous, sometimes heartbreaking story of the author’s attempts to change his lifestyle and lose the weight he KNEW was robbing him of many of life’s joys and adventures. Tommy Tomlinson admits, he has had a wonderful life, accomplished much and yet, even knowing he was morbidly obese, could never get a handle on self-control. He had the support of his wife, he had the tools of knowledge, but for anyone who has ever found solace in food knows, he lacked the self-discipline to stick to making better food choices when the going got tough.
He doesn’t blame “fat shaming” or make excuses as he details his ride up and down the “escalator scale” with raw honesty, heart and a touch of humor. Perhaps he wrote this as his attempt to solidify his own determination, making a public statement. Perhaps he wrote this to let others see the human side of obesity.
If you have ever been obese, even as a child, you will identify with Tommy. If you haven’t, lucky you. This is his story and it carries some true gems of reality and will be the catalyst to help one person while showing everyone else the rest of the story behind obesity and its hold on an ever-growing population looking for an easy fix. Pretty much, there isn’t one and yet, Tommy Tomlinson has found his key to success in losing!
This one is a must read whether you are thin, medium or large!
I received a complimentary ARC edition from Simon & Schuster!
Publisher: Simon & Schuster (January 15, 2019)
Publication Date: January 15, 2019
Genre: Non-fiction | Humor | Health | Obesity
Print Length: 256 pages
Available from: Amazon | Barnes & Noble
For Reviews, Giveaways, Fabulous Book News, follow: http://tometender.blogspot.com
THE ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM is a sometimes humorous, sometimes heartbreaking story of the author’s attempts to change his lifestyle and lose the weight he KNEW was robbing him of many of life’s joys and adventures. Tommy Tomlinson admits, he has had a wonderful life, accomplished much and yet, even knowing he was morbidly obese, could never get a handle on self-control. He had the support of his wife, he had the tools of knowledge, but for anyone who has ever found solace in food knows, he lacked the self-discipline to stick to making better food choices when the going got tough.
He doesn’t blame “fat shaming” or make excuses as he details his ride up and down the “escalator scale” with raw honesty, heart and a touch of humor. Perhaps he wrote this as his attempt to solidify his own determination, making a public statement. Perhaps he wrote this to let others see the human side of obesity.
If you have ever been obese, even as a child, you will identify with Tommy. If you haven’t, lucky you. This is his story and it carries some true gems of reality and will be the catalyst to help one person while showing everyone else the rest of the story behind obesity and its hold on an ever-growing population looking for an easy fix. Pretty much, there isn’t one and yet, Tommy Tomlinson has found his key to success in losing!
This one is a must read whether you are thin, medium or large!
I received a complimentary ARC edition from Simon & Schuster!
Publisher: Simon & Schuster (January 15, 2019)
Publication Date: January 15, 2019
Genre: Non-fiction | Humor | Health | Obesity
Print Length: 256 pages
Available from: Amazon | Barnes & Noble
For Reviews, Giveaways, Fabulous Book News, follow: http://tometender.blogspot.com
October 23, 2019
I read Tomlinson's article in The Atlantic (basically an excerpt from the book), which was very good. I decided to check out the book thinking it would be a similarly interesting, but much more in depth, look at weight and body image from a male perspective.
It ended up being very disappointing. So, so many boring anecdotes about his childhood, college experience, career, and married life - some related to his weight, but many not (and it's the author's responsibility to make things relevant and tie them together, not the readers' to slog through it all). The "story" just needed to stay on point, as this wasn't a journalist's memoir.
I thought Tomlinson would really make a deep dive into his own psychology and background and how that led him to the situation he found himself in. At the start of the book, he touches on class issues and the ways this affected his relationship to food and eating. Toward the end he gets into how he feels he never grew up and his inability to address his weight was about resisting a move into adulthood. But the discussion felt superficial, and it left me wondering about all the other insight that could been explored but wasn't.
A note that Tomlinson is one of those guys who thinks he's super witty and expects us to think he is as well, but he's just not. And he makes a bunch of self-deprecating comments to convey his insecurities and low self-esteem that are supposed to make us chuckle, but they just fall flat. For example, he says he ran around without a shirt on in front of a girl he had a crush on and that woman is now a lesbian so maybe that "flipped her." *eye roll* It's so juvenile - maybe his theory that he never grew up is right.
Finally, the use of language a couple places was really problematic. Tomlinson refers to "Afros" (p. 113) and "spooks" (p. 138). Whatever the intended meaning, it's 2019 and there are many, many words in the English language. A white man from the South who is a writer should have the sense and make the effort to find some alternative terms. I'm appalled that his editor didn't make him change these.
It's unfortunate this book wasn't better because I do think the story of men struggling with their weight and being open and vulnerable about that could offer a lot of insight into topics like oppressive masculinity, privilege (would a 450-pound woman realistically have had a successful career as a sports journalist?), intersectionality, and class and cultural identity.
I don't think that the problem is entirely that Tomlinson is a man writing about this topic. I thought Roxane Gay's book "Hunger" was also awful (for a bunch of other reasons). One of the things these two books have in common is that the authors seemingly want to try to understand what has happened to them in real time as they are writing the book. And because they never seem to fully work through things, readers are left with an incomplete picture and not enough questions answered. I'm not saying there are clear-cut explanations and answers, but I do think that it would have served them better to have spent more time getting to some resolution and getting through some kind of healing process before they wrote their books.
It ended up being very disappointing. So, so many boring anecdotes about his childhood, college experience, career, and married life - some related to his weight, but many not (and it's the author's responsibility to make things relevant and tie them together, not the readers' to slog through it all). The "story" just needed to stay on point, as this wasn't a journalist's memoir.
I thought Tomlinson would really make a deep dive into his own psychology and background and how that led him to the situation he found himself in. At the start of the book, he touches on class issues and the ways this affected his relationship to food and eating. Toward the end he gets into how he feels he never grew up and his inability to address his weight was about resisting a move into adulthood. But the discussion felt superficial, and it left me wondering about all the other insight that could been explored but wasn't.
A note that Tomlinson is one of those guys who thinks he's super witty and expects us to think he is as well, but he's just not. And he makes a bunch of self-deprecating comments to convey his insecurities and low self-esteem that are supposed to make us chuckle, but they just fall flat. For example, he says he ran around without a shirt on in front of a girl he had a crush on and that woman is now a lesbian so maybe that "flipped her." *eye roll* It's so juvenile - maybe his theory that he never grew up is right.
Finally, the use of language a couple places was really problematic. Tomlinson refers to "Afros" (p. 113) and "spooks" (p. 138). Whatever the intended meaning, it's 2019 and there are many, many words in the English language. A white man from the South who is a writer should have the sense and make the effort to find some alternative terms. I'm appalled that his editor didn't make him change these.
It's unfortunate this book wasn't better because I do think the story of men struggling with their weight and being open and vulnerable about that could offer a lot of insight into topics like oppressive masculinity, privilege (would a 450-pound woman realistically have had a successful career as a sports journalist?), intersectionality, and class and cultural identity.
I don't think that the problem is entirely that Tomlinson is a man writing about this topic. I thought Roxane Gay's book "Hunger" was also awful (for a bunch of other reasons). One of the things these two books have in common is that the authors seemingly want to try to understand what has happened to them in real time as they are writing the book. And because they never seem to fully work through things, readers are left with an incomplete picture and not enough questions answered. I'm not saying there are clear-cut explanations and answers, but I do think that it would have served them better to have spent more time getting to some resolution and getting through some kind of healing process before they wrote their books.
October 26, 2018
Tommy Tomlinson is an acclaimed journalist, a happily married man, middle aged, intelligent, witty....and overweight. The Elephant in the Room is a book about his struggle with weight, heartfelt discussion on how his weight effects his life, thoughts on his writing career, family, and life in general.
This book is a bit like sitting across the dinner table with Tommy Tomlinson and just listening to him talk. He's funny, witty, emotional and serious. He started out at 460 pounds....he faced entering his 50s feeling like the largest person in the room. He laments that he is likely the largest person most people will ever see. So, he decided to do something about it.....
This book doesn't end with a shocking before/after set of pictures with Tommy touting some wonder drug or surgery for his complete success. He admits he is a work in progress, sharing his thoughts and emotions about the journey.
I jumped at the chance to review this book because Tomlinson is from Charlotte, NC...just an hour from where I live. I understand the struggles with trying to lose weight in the south where everything is fried and tea comes to the table with about a cup of sugar in each glass (ugh -- I was born in the Midwest. Sweet tea is about the nastiest concoction on the planet. And even after 15 years in NC, when I ask for unsweet tea, I still get confused looks and then commentary about how weird it is that I don't drink sweet tea. And I won't even start on the comments I get when I pass up grits, pimento cheese spread or liver mush.)
I enjoyed this book. Tomlison is real and open....he's sharing his life, his struggles. The story isn't just for people who are struggling with weight...but anybody who faces a challenge and needs motivation. He doesn't offer some magic fix or spend long chapters talking about how he did it and anybody can. It's all about the journey. And he's making progress!
Proud of you, Tommy! Keep going! :)
**I voluntarily read an advanced readers copy of this book from Simon & Schuster via NetGalley. All opinions expressed are entirely my own.**
This book is a bit like sitting across the dinner table with Tommy Tomlinson and just listening to him talk. He's funny, witty, emotional and serious. He started out at 460 pounds....he faced entering his 50s feeling like the largest person in the room. He laments that he is likely the largest person most people will ever see. So, he decided to do something about it.....
This book doesn't end with a shocking before/after set of pictures with Tommy touting some wonder drug or surgery for his complete success. He admits he is a work in progress, sharing his thoughts and emotions about the journey.
I jumped at the chance to review this book because Tomlinson is from Charlotte, NC...just an hour from where I live. I understand the struggles with trying to lose weight in the south where everything is fried and tea comes to the table with about a cup of sugar in each glass (ugh -- I was born in the Midwest. Sweet tea is about the nastiest concoction on the planet. And even after 15 years in NC, when I ask for unsweet tea, I still get confused looks and then commentary about how weird it is that I don't drink sweet tea. And I won't even start on the comments I get when I pass up grits, pimento cheese spread or liver mush.)
I enjoyed this book. Tomlison is real and open....he's sharing his life, his struggles. The story isn't just for people who are struggling with weight...but anybody who faces a challenge and needs motivation. He doesn't offer some magic fix or spend long chapters talking about how he did it and anybody can. It's all about the journey. And he's making progress!
Proud of you, Tommy! Keep going! :)
**I voluntarily read an advanced readers copy of this book from Simon & Schuster via NetGalley. All opinions expressed are entirely my own.**
January 22, 2019
Raw and honest, Tommy Tomlinson’s memoir about how his journey through life as a fat man and his quest to get smaller is a must-read. His searing honesty about what it is like to be morbidly obese is refreshing and hits so close to home. I found myself putting off reading this book because I felt like a fraud. I too used to be morbidly obese but had lost over 200 pounds over a few year period. However, after some health issues, I let myself use that as an excuse and have now gained back 110 pounds, regaining the morbidly obese designation. I was so ashamed of my backsliding that I didn’t think I could stand to read about someone whose is succeeding but his candid soul-searching and descriptions of his struggles are instead helping to inspire me not to give up and keep trying.
Thanks to NetGalley, Simon & Schuster, and the author Tommy Tomlinson for an advanced electronic review copy.
Thanks to NetGalley, Simon & Schuster, and the author Tommy Tomlinson for an advanced electronic review copy.
December 5, 2021
I recently lost a very close family member to complications of nearly a lifetime of morbid obesity. Much of what Tomlinson writes about was also part of my family member's daily struggle -- not fitting in airplane seats, having to shop at big and tall specialty clothing stores with bland selections, being uncomfortable and anxious in public places due to concerns about not fitting in chairs, etc. So this book resonated a lot with me. Tomlinson is a masterful and eloquent writer and told his story with incredible pathos and thoughtfulness.
November 17, 2018
"Fastfood...I’m so drawn to it that I’m not sure how far the junk-food giants would have to go to make me quit:
We’re now making Cheez-Its from cat hair and sawdust. Deal with it.
All right, dammit. Gimme the party-sized box..."
This guy is a really good writer! He is so personable and his narrative is so poignant, it made me want to cry.
At first, I thought this was a self help book about someone who lost 200 lbs and changed their life, but it is really a memoir, a snapshot of the author's life in which he is happily married to the love of his life, has a great job doing something he loves and does well and is also battling an addiction with food. He's not slim, but so far, he is winning - 85 lbs is not a small amount to lose.
Reading this book has changed my perception of obese people. I had always been slim most of my life and could not understand why overweight people didn't "just stop eating and use portion control - such a simple concept , why don't they get it?" However, as I've gotten older, I realize it's not that easy to lose weight and changing your lifestyle to a different way of eating feels like a punishment with no reward for a long time, if you can even stick to it.
Emotions are also a very important part of what and why people eat.
Tommy Tomlinsome is painfully honest with his descriptions of his life, but does not feel sorry for himself, which make you like him even more.
We’re now making Cheez-Its from cat hair and sawdust. Deal with it.
All right, dammit. Gimme the party-sized box..."
This guy is a really good writer! He is so personable and his narrative is so poignant, it made me want to cry.
At first, I thought this was a self help book about someone who lost 200 lbs and changed their life, but it is really a memoir, a snapshot of the author's life in which he is happily married to the love of his life, has a great job doing something he loves and does well and is also battling an addiction with food. He's not slim, but so far, he is winning - 85 lbs is not a small amount to lose.
Reading this book has changed my perception of obese people. I had always been slim most of my life and could not understand why overweight people didn't "just stop eating and use portion control - such a simple concept , why don't they get it?" However, as I've gotten older, I realize it's not that easy to lose weight and changing your lifestyle to a different way of eating feels like a punishment with no reward for a long time, if you can even stick to it.
Emotions are also a very important part of what and why people eat.
Tommy Tomlinsome is painfully honest with his descriptions of his life, but does not feel sorry for himself, which make you like him even more.
December 11, 2019
The best book I have read about obesity and the struggles between the rational mind and emotions/addiction. It is about so much more than weight- a coming of age story for a grown man.
August 21, 2019
Tomlinson's career as a journalist and features' writer makes this one of the most readable memoirs about struggling with weight loss I have read. And I've read quite a few of them.
His courage in sharing intimate thoughts and experiences are moving and inspiring. Often this jandre becomes tiresome, but the family, friends and coworkers become real quickly and are portrayed with more depth and care than I often find in memoirs.
While the format of a calendar year is somewhat formulaic (a year-in-the-life scenario), Tomlinson overcomes it by delving into his entire life. From patterns of eating devoped in childhood, to bad habits from college and early working life, he lays out transgressions against his body with food over and over and over again. His strengths - most notably his love for family, dog and writing - shine through these stories of struggling with good health habits and healthy eating.
Despite the topic and certain aspects threatening to bring tears to the eyes, a very enjoyable read.
His courage in sharing intimate thoughts and experiences are moving and inspiring. Often this jandre becomes tiresome, but the family, friends and coworkers become real quickly and are portrayed with more depth and care than I often find in memoirs.
While the format of a calendar year is somewhat formulaic (a year-in-the-life scenario), Tomlinson overcomes it by delving into his entire life. From patterns of eating devoped in childhood, to bad habits from college and early working life, he lays out transgressions against his body with food over and over and over again. His strengths - most notably his love for family, dog and writing - shine through these stories of struggling with good health habits and healthy eating.
Despite the topic and certain aspects threatening to bring tears to the eyes, a very enjoyable read.
September 11, 2019
An honest truth work of empathically laid out words on his life, his career, his loves, and his struggles with and living through largeness.
He writes with good craft in writing clearly, with a great rhythm to his telling something very personal, these complexities and stark realities that many individuals live through.
He gives no quick fix but some looking in the mirror and hard deep questions on one self and behaviors, and how to move forward.
This could be a lifeline to many alone living through what he had and is overcoming, and one would see that there is an another, a helping hand to getting through and overcoming obstacles.
Review with excerpts @
https://more2read.com/review/the-elephant-in-the-room-by-tommy-tomlinson/
He writes with good craft in writing clearly, with a great rhythm to his telling something very personal, these complexities and stark realities that many individuals live through.
He gives no quick fix but some looking in the mirror and hard deep questions on one self and behaviors, and how to move forward.
This could be a lifeline to many alone living through what he had and is overcoming, and one would see that there is an another, a helping hand to getting through and overcoming obstacles.
Review with excerpts @
https://more2read.com/review/the-elephant-in-the-room-by-tommy-tomlinson/
December 22, 2018
Writer and podcaster Tomlinson topped out at an unhealthy 460 pounds. After numerous attempts to lose weight, Tommy commits to change his approach to a slow and steady one. He expertly weaves together his personal story, confronting issues and exposing vulnerability. His determination and accomplishment along this arduous journey are inspiring for any reader, not just one looking for the motivation to lose weight. A from-the-heart, first-hand account of what it is like to be a fat person. Thanks to Simon & Schuster for the ARC in exchange for my honest review.
February 3, 2019
i used to always reference the girl that lives inside me. sometimes she’s silly. a little demonic. quiet. loud. angry. ecstatic. hungry. sometimes she’s just me. in my favorite chapter of this book, @tommyltomlinson talks about the boy that lives inside him (which if you read it, let’s talk because of all my feelings), and i couldn’t relate to the feeling more. having had my own struggles with food, weight, body perception, i found tommy’s story to be engaging, authentic, raw, and relatable, regardless of what your weight or experience is. i feel grateful to have heard about his journey, and demystified some of the myths i had also been holding on to. i walked away feeling hopeful, hungry for more than food— for all the good that life has to offer, and with a bit of a wiser and open mind. be kinder to one another. enjoy your food. be mindful. make healthier choices when you can, and treat yourself on occasion. most of all, be kinder, maybe even kindest, to yourself.
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4.5/5 ⭐️
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4.5/5 ⭐️
December 13, 2018
Tommy Tomlinson comes to terms with being both a good person, and a liar. He's been lying to his friends, his family, his wife, and most of all himself, about his food addiction, and his weight. For the first time, in this book, he admits to the actual number on the scale, how he reached it and why he thinks he landed there. This is not a woe is me it's everyone else's fault kind of story. Nor is it a follow me and I'll teach you to drop 50 pounds a month manual. It's an honest and heart felt memoir of growing up big, in a family where food was used to celebrate triumphs as much as it was to console and soothe loss. Anyone who has ever struggled with their weight or is still struggling now can relate to this, and anyone who has ever looked at larger people and wondered how they let themselves get so big could benefit from this read.
I received an advance copy for review.
I received an advance copy for review.
May 18, 2019
A good look at how a rational man gets super fat and his constant battles and lies when dealing with it. Lying is a big part of chronic overeating, just as it is with alcoholism, drug addiction etc.
Tomlinson gives a great, unflinching look at his 460-pound self, how he got there and what he's doing about it. He delves too much into mundane trips and his journalistic career, but he waxes on and on about food. His love for it is obvious, underscoring his battle and ways his life has been constricted by his weight. Best of all, he blames no one but himself for his size, showing a lot of mettle on his part
This book is a must-read for all those skinny adults who sneer at fat passersby and blithely say, "He or she just needs to lose some weight."
Tomlinson gives a great, unflinching look at his 460-pound self, how he got there and what he's doing about it. He delves too much into mundane trips and his journalistic career, but he waxes on and on about food. His love for it is obvious, underscoring his battle and ways his life has been constricted by his weight. Best of all, he blames no one but himself for his size, showing a lot of mettle on his part
This book is a must-read for all those skinny adults who sneer at fat passersby and blithely say, "He or she just needs to lose some weight."
May 25, 2022
Tomlinson is an incredible writer! He writes in a way that makes you feel like he’s sitting across the table from you, sharing his story over a cup of coffee. This book is raw, real, and honest, and I would recommend it to anyone and everyone.
January 15, 2019
In January, 2015, nearing 50 years old, Tommy Tomlinson started his weight loss journey. He bought a Fitbit and vowed to track his calories- eaten and expended each day. His goal was to burn more calories than he ate. He weighed 460 pounds.
His diet plan was simple. But he added something more complex to it- he decided to look within and examine his own life to see if he could learn why he weighed 460 pounds. This memoir covers his first year of his plan.
His reports of his weight each month are terse- what he weighed the month before, what he weighed at the end of the month, and the difference. His honest search to learn why he gained weight and why he continued to live in a way that caused him so much pain is the heart of this book.
Fans of Tommy Tomlinson, an accomplished journalist know that he is a warm and dedicated writer with a flair for engaging his readers. His stories of growing up in a close Southern family that loved all Southern foods are delightful. Mr. Tomlinson is honest. He knows he’s fat- he’s reminded of it each day. The search for a sturdy chair, the seatbelt extension, the looks and remarks of bystanders, the difficulty in hiking with his wife, are all challenges. Was he someone worth saving?
By the end of the story, he hasn’t lost as much weight as you might have thought he would. In fact, he’s gained something- an understanding himself. I was surprised at his conclusion about himself.
Like many people, I have a weight story, too. I have gained and lost 40-50 pounds several times in my adult life. I am always keen to read the stories of others. This is a good book! Highly recommend.
I received an advanced readers copy of this book from Simon & Schuster via NetGalley. All opinions expressed are entirely my own.
His diet plan was simple. But he added something more complex to it- he decided to look within and examine his own life to see if he could learn why he weighed 460 pounds. This memoir covers his first year of his plan.
His reports of his weight each month are terse- what he weighed the month before, what he weighed at the end of the month, and the difference. His honest search to learn why he gained weight and why he continued to live in a way that caused him so much pain is the heart of this book.
Fans of Tommy Tomlinson, an accomplished journalist know that he is a warm and dedicated writer with a flair for engaging his readers. His stories of growing up in a close Southern family that loved all Southern foods are delightful. Mr. Tomlinson is honest. He knows he’s fat- he’s reminded of it each day. The search for a sturdy chair, the seatbelt extension, the looks and remarks of bystanders, the difficulty in hiking with his wife, are all challenges. Was he someone worth saving?
By the end of the story, he hasn’t lost as much weight as you might have thought he would. In fact, he’s gained something- an understanding himself. I was surprised at his conclusion about himself.
Like many people, I have a weight story, too. I have gained and lost 40-50 pounds several times in my adult life. I am always keen to read the stories of others. This is a good book! Highly recommend.
I received an advanced readers copy of this book from Simon & Schuster via NetGalley. All opinions expressed are entirely my own.
May 4, 2019
Tommy writes a pretty good book.
I don't know that this would be the book to read if you are looking for a diet plan because there is no plan in this book. However he does lose weight using a simple idea. Figure out how many calories you need for your body to do what it does and eat less calories than that. Exercise more. He believes ( and this is true ) when a fat ( sorry, obese ) person loses weight...their body catches on and starts hoarding calories. This is true. Research backs up what he says. So he believes that just doing more exercise and cutting out some of your habits ( whole sleeve of Oreos anyone? ), you can lose weight without your body catching on to you and therefore do a better job of it.
That whole idea probably takes up a paragraph or so in this book. What is terrific about this book is what we learn about Tommy, his family, friends, his job and especially the non joy of being an obese person in America.
He tells about the road of quitting sports gradually as his body just could not carry the weight around a basketball or tennis court anymore. How hard it is to go to a restaurant for fear of breaking a chair when you sit down or air travel in those tiny seats. About eating a regular meal at a meeting and then getting a second fast food meal on the way home. and seat belts that don't fit without an extension...and more.
I really, really liked this book. I hope Tommy writes more down the road to let us know how he is doing.
I don't know that this would be the book to read if you are looking for a diet plan because there is no plan in this book. However he does lose weight using a simple idea. Figure out how many calories you need for your body to do what it does and eat less calories than that. Exercise more. He believes ( and this is true ) when a fat ( sorry, obese ) person loses weight...their body catches on and starts hoarding calories. This is true. Research backs up what he says. So he believes that just doing more exercise and cutting out some of your habits ( whole sleeve of Oreos anyone? ), you can lose weight without your body catching on to you and therefore do a better job of it.
That whole idea probably takes up a paragraph or so in this book. What is terrific about this book is what we learn about Tommy, his family, friends, his job and especially the non joy of being an obese person in America.
He tells about the road of quitting sports gradually as his body just could not carry the weight around a basketball or tennis court anymore. How hard it is to go to a restaurant for fear of breaking a chair when you sit down or air travel in those tiny seats. About eating a regular meal at a meeting and then getting a second fast food meal on the way home. and seat belts that don't fit without an extension...and more.
I really, really liked this book. I hope Tommy writes more down the road to let us know how he is doing.
February 25, 2019
[Another Random Read. I drew 4: Autobiography/memoir.]
The author, a sportswriter, weighs 460 pounds. Finally moved to action by his sister's death due to her weight, he decides to make a change, based on the premise that all diets work short-term and almost no diets work long-term. With raw, unflinching honesty, he looks back at his life, from the Southern diet and sedentary lifestyle of his working-class youth to his use of food as a comfort for pain. Nothing is off limits, and he bares all the guilt he must carry along with the weight: how he's let down his hard-working, sacrificing parents, how his weight has cramped the lifestyle of his beloved wife, and how he's pawned the pain of his presumably early death on his loved ones.
Although not tormented by weight issues myself, I'm very sympathetic to those that are, and I saw a lot of myself in this book. Tomlinson is a brilliant writer, and manages to interlace his solemn topic with self-effacing and observational humor. This is an authentic, warm, kind, sad, touching book, probably required reading for all those who keep hearing that inner voice that tells them they aren't good enough.
The author, a sportswriter, weighs 460 pounds. Finally moved to action by his sister's death due to her weight, he decides to make a change, based on the premise that all diets work short-term and almost no diets work long-term. With raw, unflinching honesty, he looks back at his life, from the Southern diet and sedentary lifestyle of his working-class youth to his use of food as a comfort for pain. Nothing is off limits, and he bares all the guilt he must carry along with the weight: how he's let down his hard-working, sacrificing parents, how his weight has cramped the lifestyle of his beloved wife, and how he's pawned the pain of his presumably early death on his loved ones.
Although not tormented by weight issues myself, I'm very sympathetic to those that are, and I saw a lot of myself in this book. Tomlinson is a brilliant writer, and manages to interlace his solemn topic with self-effacing and observational humor. This is an authentic, warm, kind, sad, touching book, probably required reading for all those who keep hearing that inner voice that tells them they aren't good enough.
March 16, 2019
I am in awe of the simplicity and honesty of this book. I think we will look back on it and see it as a turning point in a new way of thinking in America. Mr. Tomlinson just shouted that, "the emperor has no clothes" and the truth of his message cannot be ignored!
I laughed, I cried, I couldn't stop turning the page. Every word rang with a brutal honesty, not just Tommy's honesty, but mine. We have been lying to ourselves America. This food thing is not complicated, it is amazingly simple. Once we learn to respect the awesome intelligence of our bodies to keep us alive then it is time to start "kicking our inner child's ass".
We do not need special diets, point systems, and detailed nutrition analysis telling us no carbs, no protein, no fat, no fruit, no white food OR only carbs, only protein, only fat, only fruit, only white foods. Bring on the "Three Step Diet". Wow, I feel empowered in a new way!
This is a phenomenal book!!!!
I laughed, I cried, I couldn't stop turning the page. Every word rang with a brutal honesty, not just Tommy's honesty, but mine. We have been lying to ourselves America. This food thing is not complicated, it is amazingly simple. Once we learn to respect the awesome intelligence of our bodies to keep us alive then it is time to start "kicking our inner child's ass".
We do not need special diets, point systems, and detailed nutrition analysis telling us no carbs, no protein, no fat, no fruit, no white food OR only carbs, only protein, only fat, only fruit, only white foods. Bring on the "Three Step Diet". Wow, I feel empowered in a new way!
This is a phenomenal book!!!!
February 24, 2020
This book reminded me a lot of Roxane Gay's book Hunger, which I absolutely loved. I came away here not as guilt-ridden and laughed a ton more! While I've definitely had my fun with roller-coasting weight gain and loss - the practical considerations a very large person goes through on a daily basis is eye opening. I really appreciate books that are able to help me empathize a bit more with other people - and this book does that well. Thankful Tomlinson was willing to share so many intimate details about his life, perspective, struggles and joys. I'm definitely a fan (sucker?) of journalists' books - and Tomlinson is not only that, but a sports one as well! While I don't think this book will help me much in my current struggle to lose some unwanted excess poundage, it may have given me some insights that I may have needed much more.
January 15, 2019
Honest and candid memoir about Tomlinson's struggle with his weight and how it has affected him throughout his life. It is so well written and engaging. If you've ever struggled with weight or have tried to make some life changes and have had setbacks, you will be able to relate wholeheartedly with this book. Tomlinson writes with no excuses - he's on a journey and does not let himself off the hook for where he's at or why he is where he is. I love that he's not trying to just fix his weight, he's really trying to understand and tackle the root of where his eating behavior stems from. I am rooting for him and it's motivated me to look at myself for similar behaviors, excuses and mentality.
January 24, 2019
I was fortunate to hear this local author speak last week and get a signed copy of his memoir hot off the press! He is such a good writer and his story about his food addiction and weight struggles is very open and honest. I highly recommend it. I hope the author continues on his road to better health (he weighed 460 on December 31, 2014 and slowly and steadily lost 85 lbs over 3 years). And, I hope his book is a bestseller!!
January 29, 2019
Beautifully written, kind, honest, empathetic, funny; wasn't sure what I was getting into but I'm glad I read it.
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