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Heart of Darkness #2

A Monster Like Me

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“I love the peculiar silence of shadows. They exist, but leave no mark.” Zeph had been a child, thrust into a war that wasn’t his. When he was older, he discovered he had landed on the wrong side of everything. He’d been fighting for sweet revenge, because of lies he’d believed—and those lies proved to be his ruin. Falling into despair, Zeph decides living is too painful. So, he writes his final act with poison and chooses to end his story. But Fate has other plans for Zeph and when he finds himself in the hands of his enemies, he has to Does he want to live? Or does he want to die? Or maybe that choice is no longer his to make. Ruled by shadows and armed with secrets he never intended to share, Zeph will be put through his toughest battle the war within himself. “He isn’t a lost cause. He’s just—lost.” That’s what Arwyn believes. She sees the monster he has become, but what she also sees is someone worth fighting for. Armed with secrets of her own, she’s determined to help Zeph fight his demons, because there was more on the line than Zeph’s soul. So much more. Revenge may be sweet. But redemption is sweeter. The question is, can Zeph find the boy he used to be, or will he always believe that no one could ever love—a monster like him. “You are everything good. And I am everything children are afraid of.” This is book 2 in the Heart of Darkness Duology and is recommended the reader begin with book 1, The Moon Shines Red.

288 pages, Kindle Edition

Published September 4, 2018

6 people are currently reading
105 people want to read

About the author

Pamela Sparkman

7 books281 followers
Pamela Sparkman grew up in Alabama. She became an avid reader at a young age. The written word has always fascinated her and she wrote her first short story while still in elementary school. Inspiration for her stories always begins with a song. She believes music is the pulse of life and books are the heart of it.

When she isn’t writing, however, she’s spending time with her family and taking one day at a time.

https://www.facebook.com/pamelasparkm...
http://instagram.com/pamelasparkman/

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Profile Image for Astrid - The Bookish Sweet Tooth.
797 reviews919 followers
September 2, 2018



READ MY REVIEW ON THE BLOG





Pamela Sparkman's writing is like a song. Lyrical, melodic, colorful, descriptive, eloquent. And when she puts that in a fantasy story you bet it's phenomenal. A MONSTER LIKE ME is the second in the Heart of Darkness series and if you haven't read The Moon Shines Red you definitely should do that before diving into this one.

A Monster Like Me starts where we left Zeph, Elin, Arwyn and Lochlan. As I dug deeper into Zeph's story understanding for his antagonistic, aggressive behavior came to me. I didn't want to love him, the things he did, how he treated pretty much every one around him, I couldn't see how I would ever forgive him. But then I found out what a tragic character he really is, that no punishment somebody else could deal was nearly as bad as the one he inflicted on himself. Zeph didn't feel worthy of anything good.
Everything he was feeling, he was setting it free, letting it out, and all his hurt and pain, anger and guilt, fear and sadness, they felt like a whip and a lash against her skin. But she took it. She took it all. Because he had carried it inside him for so long— and it was killing him.

Healing a broken soul like that takes a special person and Arwyn definitely is that. She's tenacious, thoughtful, compassionate, fiercely loyal and deeply in love with Zeph. She was the constant in his life, his rock and the balm that soothed his soul.

“You know my heartbeats?”
“Sometimes,” she said, “I don’t know if they are yours or mine.”



But it's also Elin's forgiving heart and the budding friendship between Zeph, Searly, Lochlan and Favian that gives this tortured man peace. I loved their friendship so much - these scenes gave me some much needed comic relief when emotions had been running rampant. This group of people made him see that he wasn't beyond saving and that he deserved happiness. Every time one of them managed to weaken Zeph's grip on his guilt it felt like a reward.

Don't expect that the romance between Arwyn and Zeph will be on the forefront of the story. While it is undeniably romantic and beautiful, it's Zeph's path to redemption, his own forgiveness you will be routing for. Maybe because despite Zeph's struggles to accept love, theirs was inevitable.
“Thank you,” he said.
“For what?”
“For loving me when I was so unlovable.”

“Thank you,” she said breathlessly.
“For what?”
“For not giving up.”
“You wouldn’t let me.”

Scattered throughout the story there are action scenes that will leave you breathless.

The Moon Shines Red and A Monster Like me are fantasy at its finest. These books will wrap you in a magical and wondrous world full of adventure. The characters will break your heart and you will root for every single one of them. With her narrative Pamela Sparkman makes sure of that -  she gives us fully fleshed out side characters. To say goodbye to them all is my own struggle because they have taken up a little space in my heart. I hope the author keeps writing fantasy in the future - she definitely has a talent for it.
You are neither man, nor monster, my friend. You are the magic that makes everything else shine.


Profile Image for Christie«SHBBblogger».
988 reviews1,303 followers
September 2, 2018

Title: A Monster Like Me
Series: Heart of Darkness #2
Author: Pamela Sparkman
Release date: September 4, 2018
Cliffhanger: No



“It is only at night that we can see the stars, Zeph. Darkness doesn’t have to be scary. It can be beautiful. You have just forgotten.”

It's no secret that I love Pamela Sparkman's storytelling. I've been a fan since her very first book, and with each new release, I have seen her abilities mature and grow. This fantasy series is such a departure from where she started as an author, but I wholeheartedly believe that these two books in the Heart of Darkness series are her most powerful and eloquently written. This set of characters have many tragic events and heartbreaking trials to overcome. The end of The Moon Shines Red, leaves you in a HFN (happy for now) place, but there was much left unsaid, and peace to be won. Overall, more mysteries to reveal with life altering effects. There was one character who was far from left in a happy place, and that is our poor, tortured soul, Zeph.

A Monster Like Me begins right where we left off, and reveals the depths of Zeph's despair as he attempts to take his own life. As an innocent child, his promising future was stolen from him, and he became what he most reviled in order to survive. His past had dissipated like an insubstantial dream you can't fully grasp when you wake, forever teasing him in the fringes of his mind. With misguided sins on his conscience, blood staining his hands, and atrocities committed against him, he felt so physically and mentally soiled that he would never come clean. He couldn't conceive of it. Thankfully, his ending was an unexpected new beginning. One that was destined to help him discover all that he had lost, and grace him with so much more than he could have imagined. Love. Hope. Forgiveness. And ultimately, redemption.

Guilt was a monster of its own. It was a wall that trapped him, held him prisoner, too big to go around, too mountainous to climb over. It pressed upon him until he was crushed underneath the weight of it, stealing his air and taking his hope.

Zeph is not an easy fae to love at first, but there's something about him that snares your curiosity even in his darkest. He comes a long, long, way from who he was in the previous book. Finally getting inside his head divulges things he'd have preferred to forever stay hidden. Things that were rotting him from the inside out. Despite his prickliness, anger, and quick rejection of those who attempt to reach out to him, there's a glimmer of something more peeking out that tells you he isn't beyond help. If there was ever a group of people who had the ability to bring that glimmer out of him and make it shine, it was these unlikely friends. Every time they wrenched a trembling smile out of him, it felt like a victory that was worth celebrating. I loved all of them so much.

Searly, who quietly guided them all, and encouraged them to keep on fighting with quiet life lessons and teasing wisecracks.

Elin, who overcame a terrible betrayal and taught him the powerful gift of forgiveness, and the strength of family.

Lochlan, with the gruff exterior and the heart of gold who knew the true value of friendship after years of loneliness living with a curse.

Arwyn, who firmly stood by him in faith, and believed that a man as broken as him was worth piecing back together again.

And lastly, Fávian. He was lucky enough to escape tragedy in his young life, but his innate astuteness, poetic soul, and strong principles made him wise beyond his years.

Separately, they all struggled with their own demons, some more than others. Together they formed a unified front, and a haven of support. It wasn't an smooth road they traveled together, or a simple one. Your heart aches for Zeph most especially as his sacrifices are revealed. You feel the jagged edges of his ravaged spirit, and his anguished search for a sense of purpose. But there's more to the story than their own personal healing and growth. They've been destined from the start for a higher plan, and fate will eventually lead them to their greatest battle of all.

You may be battle-worn. You may be weary. But every one of you are fierce. You are survivors. You are ready. This is your war to win. Your sufferings? They will be the thing that saves you because they are what made you. In your sufferings,” she said, “the world will be saved.”

We finally got to know Arwyn in depth here. The violet-haired elf was a bit of a mystery in the previous book, but now we got to sift through all of her layers and discover her hidden talents. As an empath, she is highly sensitive to emotion, and can easily become overwhelmed by what others are feeling. So she's learned to quiet the noise through Nyokou, the pursuit of truth, goodness, and beauty. As she harmoniously connects to nature in meditative archery exercises, she can exhale all of the excess and inhale serenity.

Her abundant compassion, and fierce loyalty were just a couple of the qualities that helped her to wait for Zeph so patiently. She was his rock, always believing in him, even when he didn't have the ability to do so himself. As a nurturer, she could neglect her own well-being, and he never failed to step up and give her the support she needed in return. It was in these moments that he gradually re-learned how to define love, and how to express it when it had been absent in his life for so long.



Their romance was a slow burn that simmered gently in the background. This is a very character driven story, with some heavy themes to address. With the internal conflicts being faced, I think that the romance was realistically and perfectly paced. Often with romantic fantasy there is an imbalance with either the fantasy or the romance, but that wasn't the case here. Zeph and Arwyn's relationship didn't suffer from a lack of development. I soaked up every bit of the yearning that seeped out of the pages, feeling the ache so keenly.

“Your heart is racing,” she said so softly. If he hadn’t been Fae, he probably wouldn’t have heard her. Zeph’s hand covered the thumping organ. “You know my heartbeats?” Arwyn laid her palm flat on the screen. “Sometimes,” she said, “I don’t know if they are yours or mine.”

I can't properly express how much I felt for these characters. They grabbed my hand, tugged me gently into their magical dark world, and wouldn't let go. I'm not ready to let go, and I'm more than a little sad that the series has come to a close. Take a chance on these books, and they will pull your heartstrings in the best way possible!!!

**A Monster Like Me can easily be read as a standalone, but to get the full experience in both books, I recommend reading them in order.



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Profile Image for Claire.
2,324 reviews737 followers
September 11, 2018
5+ - "It has been written... What must be... everything must happen exactly as it has happened..." Stars!

The second book in the Heart of Darkness series certainly shows readers the Darkness of Zeph’s life, especially his past.



A Monster Like Me is a no holds barred, brutally heart-breaking story of love, loss, redemption, reconciliation, revenge and as the story progresses, you see the chrysalis of darkness that Zeph believes he deserves to have surrounding him, thin, then lighten and eventually break open due to the strength of the love and understanding of his friends and family, especially as more of his past becomes open knowledge, and the reasons for his previous actions are explained.

"There’s a reason he’s supposed to live…"

Although you don’t need to read The Moon Shines Red to be able to understand this story, I definitely think it bought added depth to Zeph’s character and his relationship with Elin and Lochlan especially as a lot of what he did in that books is clarified in this book, their POV also makes up part of this story as well as a few other characters known and new. A Monster Like Me like its predecessor is a book where I am trying to review in generalizations rather than tell you any of the story, because it is theoretically one big spoiler.

"Know this… there is good in him. I’ve seen it."

I have read everything Pamela Sparkman has written, and this series is the author writing at her absolute best. I loved The Moon Shines Red and although A Monster Like Me turned me into a blubbering mess, I can appreciate the blood, sweat and tears that went into writing it, in order for the author to elicit such a strong reaction from me.

"Can you mend broken hearts..? Because if you can, I’ll let you have a go at it…"

"I’ll try. If you’ll let me, I’ll certainly try."


As I am sure you have already worked out, it’s not all sunshine and rainbows, Zeph’s story deals with some pretty dark subject matter, but it was part of what made him who he was, and it helps you understand why it took him some time to work through everything that had happened, to enable him to comprehend he wasn’t just a product of his upbringing, that he could change and become a better and stronger person because of it.

"If we changed once… we can change again."

Another winner, and I hope we get to visit Mirova and its characters again at some point in the future.

"It’s only at night we can see the stars… Darkness doesn’t have to be scary. It can be beautiful. You have just forgotten…"

ARC generously provided by the author, and it was as it always is, my absolute pleasure to provide the above honest review.
Profile Image for Emma.
122 reviews120 followers
August 30, 2018
3.5 stars

While the first book started with action from the beginning, the author here gave more time and space to the development of characters, before heading into action. I don't like my MCs to dwell in misery, but what Zeph had to suffer in his life, what he did, what have been done to him was too much to endure, and the self hatred and guilt he was drowning in, pushing the ones he loved away was truly devastating, for him and the people who cared about him.

Guilt was a monster of its own. It was a wall that trapped him, held him prisoner, too big to go around, too mountainous to climb over. It pressed upon him until he was crushed underneath the weight of it, stealing his air and taking his hope.

“I am darkness. You are light. That’s what we are. Night and day. You are everything good. And I am everything children are afraid of."


Arwyn was a beautiful soul her ability to feel the emotions of those surrounding her wasn't easy to live with, and with the amounts of emotions Zeph was struggling with, loving him was so exhausting, but the patience this girl had knew no limits.

“You were given a second chance, you stubborn ox! I’m not trying to save you! No one can do that. You must save yourself. I will not coddle you. I will not make excuses for you. But I will fight for you when you’re too tired to fight. I will be there for you. I will challenge you. Because I know there is good in there somewhere. And you know it too! You’re just too damn scared to try! I never thought I’d say this to you, Zeph, but you’re a coward!”

Even with all the things Zeph had to deal with, he always protected and cared for Arwyn, and her love, eventually, won the battle against his fears and guilt. 

“You should finish it,” he whispered.
She tilted her head, confused. “Finish what?”
He cradled her face, his thumbs drying her wayward tears. “Tear me down, build me back up again. Make me something new. Something else. Something other than what I’ve become.”


The lovely Lochlan and Elin were amazing, and their love grew more sweet and powerful, Favián was so cute I wanted to eat him but also a badass. I loved his selflessness, how he cared about Arwyn and the way he pushed Zeph to be a better man for her. Oh Searly, everyone needs a Searly in his life. And the friendship between the guys, gave me a lot of feels and smiles.

“You don’t think you’re so special to assume you’re the only one who dances with the devil, do you?”
Zeph huffed in disbelief. “You? Dance with the devil? How absurd.”
“Why is that absurd?”
Rubbing his temples, Zeph was too tired to venture into this particular conversation. “Because I suspect you’re a terrible dancer.”

“You are as infuriating as Lord Lochlan, you know that?”
Zeph’s jaw flexed. “Devil take me.”
“It’s true. You two are more alike than you are different.”
A frown pleated the ivory skin of Zeph’s forehead. “Now you’re just being mean.”


With the love surrounding Zeph, he learned how to love and forgive himself for the past mistakes, how can he not with the amazing people, who could see beyond the monster he believed he was. Supporting him in his journey to embracing his darkness, so he can find the light.

Do not fear your darkness, Zeph. You are the space between the stars, the weight under the sun, the canvas of the moon’s glow, stitching the fabric of the sky in place. You are neither man, nor monster, my friend. You are the magic that makes everything else shine.
Profile Image for Jenny - TotallybookedBlog.
1,908 reviews2,056 followers
September 11, 2018
description

**Spoiler-Free Review**

“A monster like me deserves no mercy.”
‘He had only ever brought pain to those he cared about. He didn’t deserve to be here. He would end this now.’
“I am nowhere…I exist. But I do not live. I am nowhere.”


A Monster Like Me by Pamela Sparkman is a book we’ve been waiting a long time for and it was beyond worth the wait. This second book in her paranormal ‘Heart of Darkness’ duet was everything and more than we could have wished for it to be. This is one of those times where you could feel every bit of the blood, sweat and tears the Author went through when putting her words to paper. As far as we’re concerned this is what books should have – the beating pulse of its creator.

“I am darkness. You are light. That’s what we are. Night and day. You are everything good. And I am everything children are afraid of…I believe that makes us enemies.”

As paranormal book lovers this duet is what it’s all about; the world creation, the folklore, the mystery and intrigue and an abundance of characters that each have their otherworldly cross to bear. Characters have stayed true to themselves and how refreshing for it to be all about the story and the characters. Pamela Sparkman is a brilliant writer with a flawless and compelling flair for fantasy combined with a vivid imaginative prose. We highly recommend reading this in order as the backstory is -in our opinion- an important piece of the full picture. It’ll make you smile, swoon, cry and fall in love with Pamela Sparkman’s words.

“It’s only at night that we can see the stars, Zeph. Darkness doesn’t have to be scary. It can be beautiful. You have just forgotten.”

The Moon Shines Red is the first book -which we loved- and it’s where we first met the ‘evil monstrous’ Zeph who believes himself to be evil incarnate after discovering that his life has been mostly consequence of lies. He’s a truly hated character and what wondrous writing ability to turn a figure of hate into a figure which demands compassion and love which is just what Pamela Sparkman did and achieved. Our hearts broke, bled and cried for him as he fights his internal war whilst trying to convince himself he’s not worthy of the love he receives from the beautiful and compassionate, Arwyn. Whilst theirs is a story of love it’s also a story of battle.

‘Do not fear your darkness, Zeph. You are the space between the stars, the weight under the sun, the canvas of the moon’s glow, stitching the fabric of the sky in place. You are neither man, nor monster, my friend. You are the magic that makes everything else shine.’

We loved being back with the characters we fell in love with from The Moon Shines Red and we were captivated with the continuing character development as well as the fighting for the cause of the realm as well as true happiness and love. But also pain…so much pain, so much emotional tragedy and a tortured soul.

‘Guilt was a monster of its own. It was a wall that trapped him, held him prisoner, too big to go around, too mountainous to climb over. It pressed upon him until he was crushed underneath the weight of it, stealing his air and taking his hope.’

A Monster Like Me is a story of external as well as internal battles. A story of righting wrongs, family loyalties and friendships. It’s a story of love and sacrifice, war and peace. It’s a story of selflessness, choices and redemption. Above all, it’s an addictive, beautiful and exhilarating tale for readers of paranormal romance with the emphasis on the paranormal, the magical and the mystical. What a powerful and almost poetic voice this Author has in the world of Fae.

“If I thought I could run from you, I quickly discovered I was a fool for trying. You’re in my veins, Arwyn. You’re in my thoughts.”

Available to purchase below
THE MOON SHINES RED Book #1 Currently 99c/99p!
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A MONSTER LIKE ME Book #2 available now
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Profile Image for Gitte TotallyBookedBlog.
2,094 reviews941 followers
September 10, 2018
description

description

**Spoiler-Free Review**

“A monster like me deserves no mercy.”

‘He had only ever brought pain to those he cared about. He didn’t deserve to be here. He would end this now.’

“I am nowhere…I exist. But I do not live. I am nowhere.”


A Monster Like Me by Pamela Sparkman is a book we’ve been waiting a long time for and it was beyond worth the wait. This second book in her paranormal ‘Heart of Darkness’ duet was everything and more than we could have wished for it to be. This is one of those times where you could feel every bit of the blood, sweat and tears the Author went through when putting her words to paper. As far as we’re concerned this is what books should have – the beating pulse of its creator.

“I am darkness. You are light. That’s what we are. Night and day. You are everything good. And I am everything children are afraid of…I believe that makes us enemies.”

As paranormal book lovers this duet is what it’s all about; the world creation, the folklore, the mystery and intrigue and an abundance of characters that each have their otherworldly cross to bear. Characters have stayed true to themselves and how refreshing for it to be all about the story and the characters. Pamela Sparkman is a brilliant writer with a flawless and compelling flair for fantasy combined with a vivid imaginative prose. We highly recommend reading this in order as the backstory is -in our opinion- an important piece of the full picture. It’ll make you smile, swoon, cry and fall in love with Pamela Sparkman’s words.

“It’s only at night that we can see the stars, Zeph. Darkness doesn’t have to be scary. It can be beautiful. You have just forgotten.”

The Moon Shines Red is the first book -which we loved- and it’s where we first met the ‘evil monstrous’ Zeph who believes himself to be evil incarnate after discovering that his life has been mostly consequence of lies. He’s a truly hated character and what wondrous writing ability to turn a figure of hate into a figure which demands compassion and love which is just what Pamela Sparkman did and achieved. Our hearts broke, bled and cried for him as he fights his internal war whilst trying to convince himself he’s not worthy of the love he receives from the beautiful and compassionate, Arwyn. Whilst theirs is a story of love it’s also a story of battle.

‘Do not fear your darkness, Zeph. You are the space between the stars, the weight under the sun, the canvas of the moon’s glow, stitching the fabric of the sky in place. You are neither man, nor monster, my friend. You are the magic that makes everything else shine.’

We loved being back with the characters we fell in love with from The Moon Shines Red and we were captivated with the continuing character development as well as the fighting for the cause of the realm as well as true happiness and love. But also pain…so much pain, so much emotional tragedy and a tortured soul.

‘Guilt was a monster of its own. It was a wall that trapped him, held him prisoner, too big to go around, too mountainous to climb over. It pressed upon him until he was crushed underneath the weight of it, stealing his air and taking his hope.’

A Monster Like Me is a story of external as well as internal battles. A story of righting wrongs, family loyalties and friendships. It’s a story of love and sacrifice, war and peace. It’s a story of selflessness, choices and redemption. Above all, it’s an addictive, beautiful and exhilarating tale for readers of paranormal romance with the emphasis on the paranormal, the magical and the mystical. What a powerful and almost poetic voice this Author has in the world of Fae.

“If I thought I could run from you, I quickly discovered I was a fool for trying. You’re in my veins, Arwyn. You’re in my thoughts.”

Available to purchase below
Amazon US
Amazon UK


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Profile Image for Tammie.
1,608 reviews174 followers
September 19, 2018
“I love the peculiar silence of shadows. They exist, but leave no mark.”

3.5 stars. When I read The Moon Shines Red last year I was quite impressed with it. It really filled my need for a good historical fantasy with that fairy-tale type feel, so I was looking forward to reading this sequel. This time around the story is focused on Zeph, who was more of a villain type character in The Moon Shines Red. I mentioned that he was a really layered character in my review for that book, and that I could sympathize with him to an extent, so I was interested in seeing how he could be redeemed in this book. Also I wanted to know why he was the way he was. This book did not disappoint in that aspect at all. I got every answer I was looking for. Some of them were quite disturbing. Be warned there is a brief scene that involves childhood rape.

This is a story about love, forgiveness, and redemption and those are themes that I'm naturally drawn to in stories. It was nice to see Zeph grow from the tortured soul he was into someone at peace, able to love, and be loved by others. It was also nice to revisit Elin, Lochlin, Arwyn, and other characters that were in the first book. There is also the addition of a new character in this book that I liked, but wasn't really sure he was needed in the book. I guess that would be one of the criticisms I have about the book. The character just didn't really seem to go anywhere other than offer comfort to someone.

In the end I loved Zeph and his story. Maybe not as much as I loved The Moon Shines Red, but this was still very enjoyable.

Thanks to NetGalley and the author Pamela Sparkman for providing me with an ARC of this book.

Review also posted at Writings of a Reader
Profile Image for Pamela Sparkman.
Author 7 books281 followers
Read
September 4, 2018
A Monster Like Me is LIVE!!!

It begins exactly where The Moon Shines Red leaves off, but it is Zeph's story. And there is still so much you don't know.

Every book I've written is special in its own way. I leave a piece of my heart behind with each of them. But this one...this one bears a piece of my soul, too. This is a redemption story; a story about survival, and yes a story about love. It is is even a story about hate. It is all of those things. But mostly, it is a story about learning to forgive. For it is in forgiving that we can open our hearts enough to learn to live again. Truly live.

Available in eBook and Paperback...
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Profile Image for Cocky Reader.
465 reviews11 followers
September 10, 2018
Five redeemed stars! Because darkness has its own kind of beauty.


Oh wow! A Monster Like Me by Pamela Sparkman is a definite must read. I fell irrevocably in love with Zeph. My heart still aches for him. I love his peculiar broken soul. He really intrigued me after reading The Moon Shines Red. His dark heart and his tortured soul made him the perfect example of an anti-hero. His darkness draw me to him. He endured the worst as a child. The monsters violated his innocence although in the shadows he found a little comfort. He is a strong and complex character. He’s a survivor and a fighter. His heart is hard as stone but deep inside him lives hope.


This is a brilliant paranormal fantasy full of hopelessness, revenge, lies, secrets, fate, action, drama, adventure, forgiveness and redemption.  It is flawlessly addictive and I can't put the right words to describe how much I loved it. It is everything and more. Fantasy never felt so real until I read this stunning masterpiece. The plot is thrilling and wonderful. The pacing is fast. You can read this book as a stand alone but I urge you to read the first one in the series because there is some background information you won't want to miss.  


There are some sensitive details that the author uses to bring reality to the main male character of this book. There are also emotional and touching scenes that had me fearing to finish the book because good books like this make me crave more. The tension and suspense had me at the edge of my seat. I keep turning pages like a maniac.


Pamela Sparkman’s writing is engaging and she managed to give to her stories a good balance between dark and light, good and evil, corruption and hope. I am totally addicted to her books.


Zeph and Arwyn’s story is a journey of forgiveness and redemption. Their connection is everything. At the beginning we could think that Zeph is a dark monster without heart, incapable of loving, but he saved Arwyn. That will make Arwyn his redemption. He is given a second chance.


Arwyn has been drawn to Zeph since the begging. His heartbeats are hers and her heartbeats are his. She knows him like no other. She felt his pain and she is willing to heal him because the darkness inside him could extinguish the light in his heart. Both will find a way to fight the demons that threaten them.


The battles, the adventure and everything made this book so wonderful. Pamela penned a bittersweet, lyrical and poetic oeuvre d’art. There is nothing forced or rushed, everything felt right and my heart still hurting. I highly recommend you this book. It will consume you slowly until you burn into flames. Because darkness has its own kind of beauty.
Profile Image for Angela.
8,582 reviews123 followers
September 5, 2018
5 Stars

A Monster Like Me is the second and concluding instalment in the Heart of Darkness Duology by Pamela Sparkman. It is an incredibly good paranormal fantasy, full of despair, revenge, lies, secrets, depression, choices, fate, life and death, action, danger, drama, adventure, battles, tests, friendship, redemption, and forgiveness.
Because this is the second part of a duology, I really recommend reading the first instalment before you begin this one, as there are important facts and backstory that will enhance your overall reading experience of this book.
There are some emotional details of a sensitive nature, but the author doesn’t use them gratuitously, she is careful, but also realistic about it. It made my heart ache. There are quite a lot of touching scenes also, and the depiction of the friendships, and banter really made me smile and warmed my heart. There was also tension, suspense, and heart-stopping details that sent me scrambling, flipping pages as I read along to find out how things would work out. The story is really well written, and Ms. Sparkman managed to shade the story really well, giving it true balance- blending both darkness and light into the storyline.
The characters are just fantastic- fully developed individuals who are original, complex, flawed, and a little quirky. Zeph is the perfect example of an anti-hero, and when I embarked on this book I wasn’t entirely sure how I would feel about him at the end of the story, I wasn’t sure I could like him- But he really did win me over, and his story is quite compelling. I loved the other secondary characters too, although I feel they all played important rolls in the story, helping the story to flow and grow….and adding extra interest. I love Arwyn, she is amazing, and the connection she has with Zeph is everything…..
I read the book completely engrossed in the wonderful world that Ms. Sparkman ingeniously created. I was swept into this action-packed adventure, hanging on every word- there was a lot at stake (including my heart)- I could see and feel, the blood sweat, tears, joy, emotion, heart, and soul, that Ms. Sparkman put into her creation….. and I. Loved. Every. Single. Word!!!
I am excited to see what she will do next!

Thank you, Ms. Sparkman!
Profile Image for Shannon.
2,752 reviews223 followers
December 28, 2018
an·ti·he·ro
ˈan(t)ēˌhirō,ˈanˌtīˌhirō/
noun
noun: anti-hero
a central character in a story, movie, or drama who lacks conventional heroic attributes.

I’ve never really understood the whole “anti-hero” thing. Honestly, whenever I saw the question “Who’s your favorite anti-hero?” thrown out I had no answer for it. I mean, other than Joe from You I can’t think of a single one. That's just not the type of character I seek out or have cared enough about for one to make an impression on me. Until now. Until Zeph. I can now officially call Zeph my favorite anti-hero. Hell, at this point he’s pretty much my favorite everything. And who could have ever imagined that after reading The Moon Shines Red?!? Not me, that is for sure. How did this happen? Two words- Pamela Sparkman.

Wow. That’s about all I can muster even 3 days after finishing Zeph’s story. At this point in my life I think I’m fairly good at picking books that know I’m going to enjoy, but sometimes there are books that just sneak up and grab me by the heart, with little to no fanfare. The Moon Shines Red, the first book in this duet where we meet Zeph, was one such book, so I should have known what to expect with AMLM. But we’re talking about Zeph here- awful, dangerous, killer Zeph. How was I supposed to know I’d cry tears over him, cry tears for him? How was I supposed to know I’d want to hug him and love on him and tell him everything was going to be okay? How was I supposed to know I’d fall in love with this evil, evil being??? But I did and I have no regrets.

Ms. Sparkman wove such a beautifully heartbreaking tale to bring us all facets of this highly complicated and damaged character. She gave us the whys and the hows and the ohmygods that we needed, to show us Zeph was so much more than the monster he believed himself to be. A Monster Like Me is Zeph’s story of hope and redemption and love, and once again I was left crying tears of happiness as I closed the last page on a Pamela Sparkman novel.
Profile Image for Jessica Burrows.
Author 0 books7 followers
September 7, 2018
My thoughts:

“Revenge may be sweet. But redemption is sweeter.”

I have almost all of Pamela’s novels and I have adored them all! She is a brilliant author and a kind and caring woman. I have stated many times before but a few years ago I was in a terrible reading slump. I hadn’t read in 12 months due to my mental health and her novel Stolen Breaths completely obliterated that slump. Everything Pamela brings out is always on the top of my reading list.
When she informed me she was releasing the second book in her Heart of Darkness duology, I was thrilled! Finally I got to hear Zeph’s tale!

Let’s start with the characters:

Zeph: Zeph is a strong character in personality and emotion. His presence is always felt in a scene. He is clearly the villain, this much can be seen from The Moon Shines Red, and denies anything good in himself. Despite many people trying to convince him of said good, he is adamant that only evil dwells within him. He needs to come to the truth of his life in his own time and deal with what troubles lay in his past. By the end of the novel, you see someone truly worth being called a hero. For as much evil as he as committed, he has also committed an equal amount of good.

Arwyn: Arwyn is beautiful. Her story would be a long and tumultuous one if ever Pamela decided to give her her own novel. She is gentle and fierce. She is vulnerable and a protector. She is all things. If not for her, Zeph would not have a reason to continue. If not for her, many characters would have nothing to do with Zeph. And, if not for her, Elin (Zeph’s sister) would not appreciate Zeph as much as she does.

Elin: Elin is a minor character in A Monster Like Me, her tale began in The Moon Shines Red. Though she is a huge part of Zeph’s recovery. She, being the light of the world, mirrors Zeph’s darkness but she also holds a major key to Zeph’s healing - the love and acceptance of their parents.

Lochlan: Lochlan is a protector. He is not interested in Zeph in the slightest, his one position is to protect the monks and women he cares about. Unfortunately for him, that means the very same monks and women who love Zeph. As I admire the character Zeph is, I did not like Lochlan at first. He was cruel to Zeph (they are cruel to each other!) but it doesn’t take too long for both men to warm up to each other. One of my favourite scenes include Zeph, Lochlan and some name-calling (in jest rather than cruelty!).

Searly: Searly has always been this warming, kind presence. As the head of the monks, he is gentle and ready to help in any way he can. I’m not going to say too much more about him as he is one you just have to read for yourself.

Favian: Favian is a new character! He is Searly’s nephew and a much needed friend for Arwyn. He cares deeply for her and tries to encourage something between them but soon realises he is little more than a stand in for a brother. This, he comes to terms with and, if anything, it makes his admiration for her stronger. He is an interesting character to read as he has his own separate tale and troubles.

Now for the plot:

The plot is smooth but not for the light hearted. As with all of Pamela’s books, the characters are confronted by many real issues which can be hard to read but important for them to overcome their issues. And, as Pamela has stated, A Monster Like Me includes a childhood rape scene. However this is done as respectfully as one can imagine. She chooses her words carefully and doesn’t go into graphic detail.

The book begins with our damaged Zeph on the cliff ready to end it all after the trouble he has caused those he loves (though doesn’t realise he loves them). However, said loved ones do not allow him to be gone long. Upon resurrection, his troubles become worse. He now has to deal with living with those he has hurt and it affects him tremendously, his dark moods getting the better of him many times.

But there is hope. The people he loves want to help him and do anything in their power to show him they appreciate his company. Along the way he heals, falls in love and finds real friends of his own.

The epilogue is one of the most beautiful pieces of writing I have ever read. Using the crystal ball novel ending method, the reader is given a view of the future of the land and our beloved characters.

Something I always crow about is Pamela’s writing - and I have collected a few quotes for you!
First and foremost, Pamela has an incredibly unique voice: “Streams may appear powerful because they are loud and rebellious, but underneath they are shallow and wield no real powers.”

Her writing is flowery enough to read like poetry but not sound cliche. “Majestic oak trees stood silent, casting shadows like black lace. Birches, with their slender skeletal frames, arched like craggy old men. The evergreens were blackish-green silhouettes and the red maples looked more like burnt-out torches.”

She uses seamless language fragments in the book: ‘“El cielo me ayude,” he murmured. Heaven help me.’

Pamela’s work is so quote-worthy. I have highlighted so many scenes in the novel that the ebook is coated in yellow. I will leave you with one last quote: “Do not fear your darkness, Zeph. You are the space in between the stars, the weight under the sun, the canvas of the moon’s glow, stitching the fabric of the sky in place. You are neither man, nor monster, my friend. You are the magic that makes everything else shine.”

Would I Recommend This? Yes!
Profile Image for Heather❀Kiss The Pages❀.
755 reviews297 followers
September 3, 2018
The fantastical Heart of Darkness series continues and this one was even better than the first. This is Zeph's story and if you read the first book, then like me, you are probably already fascinated with this anti-hero. How does a villain become the hero? How does a man like Zeph find redemption after all he's done? There was so much darkness in Zeph and his past actions were seemingly so unforgivable. From the beginning we see him in so much despair that he tries to end his own life but he is unwillingly given a second chance.

Arwyn is an elf that sees another side of Zeph because to her, Zeph was her saviour. She has been in love with him for a long time but of course Zeph does not feel worthy of reciprocating such feelings.
"What is it you think I do not see? Your shadows? The darkness?...It is only at night that we can see the stars, Zeph. Darkness doesn't have to be scary. It can be beautiful. You have just forgotten."

The intensity of Arwyn and Zeph's connection was a palpable thing. Arwyn is an empath and so has the ability to sense other people's emotions and her connection with Zeph appears to be even more heightened.
"Your heart is racing." Zeph's hand covered the thumping organ. "You know my heartbeats?""Sometimes, I don't know if they are yours or mine."


I've never wanted such a broken hero to find his happy ending. I felt his pain in my bones! Pamela Sparkman unravels Zeph's story at just the right pace. I was constantly engaged from beginning to end, always needing more and yet feeling fully satisfied by the end of this tale.

This is one of these books with very incredible and unforgettable secondary characters. The level of friendship and love had me so emotional. The character development was amazing and the plot was solid. Most of this book focuses on Zeph's journey to forgive himself and ends with a few battles and great action packed scenes and eventually culminates in one hell of an amazing ending! Highly, highly recommended series!

5 Stars
Fantasy Romance
Series: Heart Of Darkness, #2 (Book 1 recommended to be read first)
Heat Level: Very Mild
HEA


description

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Profile Image for Quirkybookwormkat.
434 reviews39 followers
September 1, 2018
When I finished this book, I had to absorb and reflect what I just read. This author carefully and eloquently took me into her world.. Her beautiful world of Seelies, Unseelies, Faerie, and humans. The main character was the most complex villian/hero I've come across in a long time. Pamela has carefully crafted all kinds of emotions and managed to evoke them from me easily. I was able to connect with all the characters easily and strongly. I did not realize it was the second book in a series until too late. I was hooked and no turning back. This book can be stand alone. I need to get the first book and cannot wait for the next book to come out!
I received this ARC of this book from Net Galley and Xpresso Book Tours for an exchange of an honest review
Profile Image for Anne OK.
4,114 reviews555 followers
July 4, 2018
Pamela Sparkman did not disappoint in the finale to the "Heart of Darkness" book duo.

FULL REVIEW WILL BE POSTED CLOSER TO RELEASE DATE.
Profile Image for Melyssa Winchester.
Author 32 books240 followers
September 3, 2018
So, as seems to be my way of being on this website, and pretty much in general, I'm gonna leave the awesomely worded, eloquently stated reviews to those professional ladies that are way better at it than me and just review based on my own lame attempt at explaining what a book means.

First, these tags above, are gonna confuse people. Like, how do you get real life issues in a fantasy book?
That I will explain, in as little detail as I can, but I'm a blowhard, so oops if I screw up.

When you write a particular instance into a book that can happen to you or me, it makes it real. Not to mention, when it happens to a lot more people than even come forward in real life on the daily, it's also a real world issue and thing. Fictional setting or biography, it's still something people on the daily face, so hence my tags.
One particular issue I'm quite familiar with these days especially from a young child perspective is in this story. I've written about it before. It's one that honestly, needs more voices added to it, and if a fictional book can pull people in, start that conversation and even extend it, than so be it. Because it just needs to be a thing.

So, that's one of the main reasons this book was so pivotal to me as a human being reading it. It felt real, even though somewhere down deep (because I still have hope there is a Lochlan out there), I know the fae aren't real.

The author handled this issue with a lot of care which is also a trigger for me personally (because of the human close to me that lived it). Like, the level of care here, what she did in order to make it feel real, to reach the people reading on the very serious issue this is, is literally unmatched and yes I do mean literally.

Now, apart from that, the story itself was solid and sound. For the world that was created in book one (cheap plug: The Moon Shines Red...read it because it's freaking awesome), the detail that was needed here to make the world come alive, let alone the sheer amount of character detail and information, especially since you can read this standalone, it's not an easy task for any author. Even seasoned ones in the particular genre this stands in. Pamela Sparkman, she nailed it. I didn't feel at any point like there was too much information, OR that there wasn't enough. There was just enough. To connect you to the characters, to make you fall in love with them all, the entire cast and crew (yeah this should be a movie, so get on it studios). The battles, both inward and external, done to perfection. It was a full fleshed out story that commands and demands with reason, your attention every single second.

I was honoured to read this story, not because I've read all the other ones, but because I know with each book that this author grows. There is just something about whatever sub genre she touches (apart from the romance) that she just lives and breathes while writing and honestly, we should all aspire to be her. Her books are what I've come to expect fiction to be.

Thanks for that author lady. You've ruined me for the world (kidding of course)

I've already gone out of my way to explain what this book meant to me (in a more serious and less blurting out all the words way before), but I'll say it again, this is her most powerful book, by far but it won't always be that, because I know the next one will be even more. It's what she does. Raising the bar for all of us. Which, good on you for that.

Is this story a laugh a minute fun ride all the time? Nope. It is funny sometimes. It is a fun ride, because well who doesn't love a good battle scene...tell me, I'll wait. But, it is a story thats really rough to take because of how deep it makes you feel and what it makes you feel. This insane amount of emotions that sometimes overtake you and you need to find stable ground for.

That being said is it a story that grabs you, makes you feel, rips out of your heart and then puts it back together at the right time for all involved, reader and character alike? Yes. Absolutely. But then again, I'd expect nothing less here. Truly.

For as long as this author writes, I will be a reader, sitting here freaking out and taking in all the words, especially if all the words come together and create another book that feels like this one.

Pamela Sparkman doesn't just write the melodic stories that read like the songs you love, she IS the song and I can't wait to see what she comes up with next.






Profile Image for Liz.
1,327 reviews19 followers
September 18, 2018
“A monster like me deserves no mercy.”

I had several preconceptions of what type of novel this was going to be when I dove right in. Surely, it would have some dark and luminous magic, adventure, and mystery, otherworldly creatures, and sci-fi a plenty. I was so wrong. Now, there was a lot of the above, but this book exceeded my expectations and was so much more than a tale of fantasy and lore. It was a touching story of love and loss, the impact that the desire for revenge can cause a person, endless life lessons woven into a fast paced story line that will keep you gripped from beginning to end. My only critique would be one of myself for not reading the first book, The Moon Shines Red, before this one. It was a tad confusing in minor areas, but I still immensely enjoyed the book, and now have another to go back and devour. I would recommend that you read about Pamela Sparkman’s character breakdowns at the end. She shines some light on who these characters where to her, how they grew within her mind and helped her create this amazing novel full of their story.


Zeph has not had the ideal life, in fact it has been quite terrifying at times. When he was just a child he was kidnapped! After he finally was able to return home, he was a completely different person. Cold inside and out. He believes that he doesn’t deserve love, friends, or anyone really around him. His chrysalis of darkness envelopes him helping create that barrier.


‘He had only ever brought pain to those he cared about. He didn’t deserve to be here. He would end this now.’

Arwyn has always been drawn to Zeph. She can sense his pain and understands it, but she wants to heal him before what little light that is left in him fades out to black forever. They must work through the demons plaguing Zeph together.


“I am nowhere…I exist. But I do not live. I am nowhere.”

The plots and the lessons hidden within are penned so smoothly and with such beauty that you don’t even realize the world passing around you as you read. You are transported to the world of Zeph and walk along beside him as his chrysalis slowly begins to crack with the patience, loyalty, and undivided love and attention of family and friends. Especially, as he discovers more and more about his past and demons. I love this next quote, and the implication it portrays. It makes me think of the thing I tell my mini every day on the way to school, a tradition passed amongst the women in the family. “Remember, just find one little thing in today that made you happy for one second. Anything, a butterfly flew by you, you didn’t fail that test… etc.” It is the tiniest of things that can make our day. Then pay that forward. Every afternoon we discuss. Even in the darkness, or the darkest of days, there is some happiness/ beauty to be found. It only takes a moment to look for it, and pass it on. I would like to see more of these characters. I know, it’s the conclusion, but I really loved Zeph and Arwyn. I will be sad when I finish book one. Thank you for the gorgeous gem of a novel Pamela Sparkman.

“It is only at night that we can see the stars, Zeph. Darkness doesn’t have to be scary. It can be beautiful. You have just forgotten.”

Profile Image for Krystal Gregory.
253 reviews4 followers
September 18, 2018
A Monster Like Me, Book 2 in the Heart of Darkness Series by Pamela Sparkman
5 out of 5 stars

Pamela Sparkman is a master with words. She creates fluid movement where none exist, and yet her story is as solid as the bricks in a house.
Mrs Sparkman brings us back to Zeph, Elin, Arwyn, and Lochlan. If you have not already read the first book in this series, The Moon Shines Red, do yourself an enormous favor and read it before you read this book. While you can read this book on its own, you will benefit from previous knowledge of the characters, stories and trials.

My favorite character to date must be Zeph. His character is more complex than the others and in this story, we learn a bit more as to why he is the way that he is. This book delves into each of the characters and you learn more about why each are who they are.

This fantasy novel is in the middle of the world of magic and mystical beings. Zeph’s life has been thrown upside down and everything that he has ever been told is a lie. Arwyn, with her loving and compassionate heart, is trying to heal the broken soul that is Zeph, but she is finding it very hard to do, when everything, and everyone is against them.

Pamela Sparkman is a master. I do not know how else to describe it. Words fail me. This is magnificent.
Profile Image for Bobbi Wagner.
5,020 reviews65 followers
September 4, 2018
This is my first book by this author and I enjoyed it from beginning to end. I enjoyed her attention to details that made the story come alive and made me feel as if I was right there with the characters. Her characters took me on a journey of life and death and choices that may or maybe not be yours to make. I enjoyed watching these characters grow throughout the story and watching them try to find themselves. I highly recommend this book.
Profile Image for Cynthia Ayala.
Author 6 books56 followers
September 24, 2018
A powerful novel that follows a band of characters as they try to navigate their way out of the darkness that almost swallowed them up. As a fantasy novel, this story had to be unique in some way, especially in dealing with fairies, and the way the story functions is pretty unique. There is a coldness that emanates from the story as it talks about the Unseelie court, brutality that makes the story jump off the pages and infect the reader with fear and anger. It’s good when a story makes the reader feel so strongly for the characters and the story, not to mention the world that is being built here.

Sparkman did an incredible job building this world and recreating this fantasy and these fairy creatures for the reader. The essence that surrounds them, the plot and definition of the characters is unique and truly stands out. Not to mention the message the story holds the message of perseverance.

The base of the story is all about hope; it’s about having hope and finding the light even in the darkest of times. It means that even when someone loses themselves to darkness the way Zeph lost himself to the darkness that they can find the light and find a way to save themselves from the overwhelming darkness. That message is so incredibly powerful. Zeph found his way out, but this story is all about him and his newfound friends trying to pick up the pieces, to repair themselves and their relationships with one another, to repair everything damaged by the dark with love and hope. And it is an incredible journey to follow because it allows the characters to move about the story with dimension, to jump off the pages and litter the reader with their emotions and thoughts, making the reading experience even more compelling. These characters grow together; they form this bond that allows them to face the darkness head-on once more, adding tension and action to the novel.

There is another thing that makes this story so good, and it’s Sparkman’s use of language. There are some scenes that are triggering, and thankfully Sparkman does give the reader notice before even beginning to read the story, but what makes those scenes as powerful as they are triggering is her limited use of language. These are scenes that have every opportunity to be explicit but are not, and it’s all due to Sparkman’s impeccable use of language. She uses the minimalist of words to get the scene around, playing on the slightest of details to make the scene pop. And pop they do. The reader isn’t dulled by the excessive use of language, there is enough provided to lure the reader in, keep them grounded, and focus on what is happening in the story rather than be distracted by the detail and words. These scenes carry so much power and that’s how they should be. Admittedly they are uncomfortable to read, but they should be, but that only serves to give them more weight, lending to the creation of a powerful novel.
Profile Image for Laura Furuta.
2,047 reviews28 followers
September 5, 2018
A Monster Like Me (Heart of Darkness Book 2)
By: Pamela Sparkman
5 out of 5 stars

The story A Monster Like Me (Heart of Darkness Book 2) by Pamela Sparkman is a fantasy book. It is a story that includes magic and mystical creatures. I quickly found myself lost in the plot/story and not wanting to put the book down until I had read the final page. It had me turning pages to find out what was going to happen next. You are taken on an emotional journey with the two main characters of Zeph and Arwyn. Zeph’s life had been a quest for revenge. When he finds that what he was told was based on a lie he then finds himself feeling guilt and regret. Zeph is a character that doesn’t make it easy for those around him to care about him. The way that he comes across at times is arrogant and rude. It is hard to get to know the real Zeph as he keeps and guards his secrets well. However, there is one that sees past what Zeph portrays. I found myself drawn to Zeph as a character and empathizing with him. He emotions are so conflicted and he at times doesn’t see his own worth. Arwyn is an elf. She can sometimes be distant and sad. She also is patient and caring. She is someone who refuses to leave Zeph even with the way he acts towards her and others. Zeph and Arwyn seem to have a connection between them. What does the future hold for both Zeph and Arwyn? Read this book to find out. This story does have other characters that I enjoyed reading about in both the way the fit into the storyline and also how they interact with Zeph and Arwyn. The story is wonderfully detailed, and I felt that I was right there with the characters. This is a book that I loved reading and would highly recommend.
Profile Image for E.A..
952 reviews28 followers
September 6, 2018
A Monster Like Me (Heart of Darkness #2) by Pamela Sparkman was a darker story then I'm sure to, the heaviness of the book, and the journey really had me not only hooked, but invested.

My first read by this author and this series, I missed somethings from the first book, but I quickly caught on, and managed to throw myself into this feels ripping book. No worries I will be going back and reading the first book. Don't be like me and start in the middle, as this is a connecting series, so please read the first book first.

Wow, I have so much running through my head right now. This was way out of my comfort zone, not so much in genera, but in theme and overall plot. I don't normally read such emotionally, dark, character driven stories. I don't know really how I feel about it, but at the same time, I loved almost every minute of this book. Zeph was a hard character to really connected to at first, but he wiggled his way into my heart, and as he started to grow, make friends, see that his darkness wasn't all consuming, he started to shine and that slow burn romance really connected all the elements together. There was nothing forced or rushed, everything felt natural, and man oh man, my heart is still hurting a little.

Overall I have to say, that this book was outstandingly good. The writing was rich, deep and really sucked you in and slashed at your heart strings. I am going to be following this series, because I believe it is something special and worth talking about. So please take my super high recommendation and my stamp of approval that you will find yourself unable to look away, or have the power to stop from reading, this on of a kind book.

Happy Reading

-E.A. Walsh
Profile Image for Lisa.
3,788 reviews21 followers
September 16, 2018
A Monster Like Me (Heart of Darkness #2)
By Pamela Sparkman
Rated 4 stars

I was impressed with this story. It’s the second in the series. I did not read the first one and had some difficulty at times but most issues ironed themselves out. I enjoy stories like these. There is such world and character building taking place. I loved being in Faery. I know there are dangers there but it’s a place where anything seems possible.
Zeph has had a let’s say difficult life so far. He was kidnapped as a child. Once he returned he became a cold heartless person. Many atrocities were caused by him. He thinks he is worthless and the world would better without him. His bright shining star is Arwyn. She knows there is good in Zeph. She just needs to figure out how to show it to him.
There are many great characters in this story. The main ones and there are a few others that jump out at you while reading. There are good and evil. As to be expected...since that is Faery’s MO. Most of the characters have a previous history together (think book 1). So that helps them along. I liked the love/hate relationship Zeph and Lochlan have....well seems everyone has a hate/hate relationship with Zeph.

This is my first book by this author. The story was fast paced and entertaining. The characters were interesting and complex. Zeph was an impressive guy. I wasn’t sure whether to like him or be irritated by him. By the end of the book I think I loved him. What a change this boy goes through.

Make sure you read the note from the author at the end. It opened my eyes to how authors *see* their characters. Listening to her talk about Zeph was so neat. I learned a bit more about Zeph and the author. It made me appreciate the story that much more.
3,105 reviews34 followers
September 8, 2018
A Monster Like Me by Pamela Sparkman is he second book in her Heart Of Darkness series. A gripping story that will have you fully invested in the characters.
Zeph has only ever known war. Fighting from being a child it is his whole life. However, after years, he begins to realise that he isn’t on the right side at all. Everything he has done is all wrong.
When everything he believed to be true is ripped from him, Zeph decides that it is time to end his life. With nothing left to fight for he is ready to go. What he didn’t expect was to end up in an enemy camp. What he expected even less was to find his purpose within that camp.
Zeph begins the struggle of fighting once again. Except this time the fight is within himself. He fights to try and find the person he once was, the one before all the fighting and the lies and the betrayal. And even with as hardened to the fighting as what he is, this is one battle Zeph might just lose.

I loved everything about this book - Deol the characters, to the writing, to the cover of the book. I really felt like I became invested in Zeph and the battles he went through. As a character he was so easy to connect with. The journey throughout the book you are taken on with him was entertains and engaging. The author knows how to weave a tale so interesting that it keeps you hooked to the end. This is a new author for me but I will be looking out for her work in the future!
352 reviews1 follower
September 21, 2018
A spellbinding read about second chances. Zeph has always been on the dark side and has done many terrible things along the way. When he tried to kill himself in despair, he is saved and healed by an elf. Surrounded by people who hate him, will Zeph change for the better or return to his old ways?
A brillaint read. Well developed plot with twists and turns that I just couldn't put down. Well developed characters like Zeph cold personality while struggling with his feelings or Arwyn living in hope but still standing up for herself. Zephs struggles to find his way and not be a monster was powerful and emotive throughout. Great supporting cast of fun friends like Lorchlan or Seary.
I loved the visual detail throughout the novel like with the sea and the cliff and the forest as wild untamed beauty which was perfectly written. I also loved the detail of the monsatery as something sacred but unique. I also loved the use of opposites in the novel in light and dark/ night and day or religion and magic which worked beautifully together to make contrasts with wonderful vivid colours.
I also loved the fantasy used in the novel with realms and magic with different societies and laws to create a spellbinding fantasy world. The inclusion of magical beings with different powers and mystical creatures of darker mythology made for a captivating read and was beautifully written. Overall, a great read and I would give it five stars.
Profile Image for Moriah Venable.
1,374 reviews33 followers
September 21, 2018
A Monster Like Me is the second novel in the Heart of the Darkness series by Pamela Sparkman.

Continuing where the first book left off, Zeph is pushing those he loves away, feeling guilt and and self hatred.

Zeph is battling his own emotions and makes the decision to take poison, but there are things at work that have other plans.

Will Zeph be able to to overcome his demons and see that it is worth living? That he deserves Arwyn loves even when he doesn’t believe that he does?

While I have not read the first book, Zeph’s pain and emotions were very relatable, and made me feel for him.

I also felt for Arwyn for she love Zeph but she know she can’t save him; only he can do that.

I felt this was magical book, with great writing and characters that you relate to and enjoy reading about.

Now I am definitely going to read the book to get a better understanding. I’m sure if the first book is anything like this book, I will have no problem being drawn in and putting the missing puzzle pieces together.
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1,024 reviews4 followers
September 19, 2018
A Monster Like Me by Pamela Sparkman
Four Stars

A Monster Like Me is the second book in the Heart of Darkness series by Pamela Sparkman. This duet should be read in order because there is important backstory in the first book, The Moon Shines Red. This paranormal book is full of magic, mystery, mythical creatures and adventure.
Zeph is the perfect anti-hero at his best. He is cold hearted and angsty, and makes it almost impossible for anyone to get close to him. He has had a hard life and was fed a bunch of lies that he based his life on, so when he finds out the truth he really doesn’t know how to deal with life. Arwyn has always felt something for Zeph, but refuses to commit to him until he starts to heal.
The emotions Ms. Sparkman bring in this amazingly written book held my attention from beginning to end. This book had me rooting for Zeph to heal and find his true self. I highly recommend this book, series and author.
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2,260 reviews15 followers
September 20, 2018
A Monster Like Me
By Pamela Sparkman
4 stars

Although this is the second book in the series I read it as a standalone and whilst some back story probably would have added to my reading experience I still thoroughly enjoyed it. I thought that they authors writing was really good, it was engaging and definitely pulled me quickly. The characters had a great depth to them and they developed really well.
When I first read the blurb to the story I wasn’t quite sure what to expect – but I know that what I did read was not what I predicted at all. The story was beautifully written, there was love, loss, revenge and so much more in between.
There were so many things in the story that made me stop and think and some that have stayed with me long after finishing the story.
I really enjoyed reading A Monster Like Me, it was thought provoking and really well written. I would love to read more from this author in the future and absolutely will be reading book 1 in the series too.
Profile Image for Eva.
753 reviews4 followers
August 28, 2018
It took a few chapters to get into the story, as I had not read the previous book, but after that it was a fluent reading pleasure.

I loved this book! - It's so emotionally written.
At the beginning there was so much loss, pain and self-hatred that it literally pulled me down emotionally. But with each additional page, this feeling changed into a lighter mood, in the end even in happiness. Did I cry in between? - Yes, I did.

Zeph is one of the most tortured and tragic characters I've ever read about in a faeary tale so far.
- He is beautiful in his darkness.

I also liked the other characters of the book. - Everyone had their own story, their own loss, their own happiness and at the end they were like a family.


I received an ARC from the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
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