Love Talk Starters: 275 Questions to Get Your Conversations Going

by Les Parrott III, Leslie Parrott

Acclaimed relationship experts Les and Leslie Parrott are back with a wonderful and insightful guide for improving the single most important factor in any marriage or love relationship--communication. In Love Talk, the Parrotts will help you discover you and your partners' communication style, and learn the best ways for your styles to interact. In this companion book, Love Talk Starters, you will find engaging, intriguing, and revealing conversation starters. Some questions are just for fun, some will educate you about your spouse's life, and still others will drill down on some more serious topics. Use these simple conversation starters and begin communicating your way into a happier, healthier, and stronger relationship today.

Genres: Marriage, Nonfiction, Relationships, Christian, Self Help, Personal Development, Family

256 pages, Mass Market Paperback

First published September 21, 2004

About the author

#1 New York Times best-selling authors, Les and Leslie. A husband-and-wife team who not only share the same name, but the same passion for helping others build healthy relationships. In 1991, the Parrotts founded the Center for Relationship Development on the campus of Seattle Pacific University - a groundbreaking program dedicated to teaching the basics of good relationships.

Married in 1984, the Parrotts bring real-life examples to their speaking platform. Their professional training - Leslie as a marriage and family therapist, and Les as a clinical psychologist - ensures a presentation that is grounded, insightful and cutting-edge.

The Parrotts are New York Times #1 Best Selling Authors. Their books include the award-winning Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts, Love Talk, Real Relationships, The Parent You Want to Be, The Hour That Matters Most and Crazy Good Sex.

Each year Les and Leslie speak in over 40 cities. Their audiences include a wide array of venues, from churches to Fortune 500 company board rooms. Their books have sold over two million copies in more than two dozen languages.

The Parrotts have been guests on many national TV and radio programs such as CNN, Good Morning America, CBS This Morning, The View with Barbara Walters, NBC Nightly News, and Oprah. Their work has been featured in USA Today and The New York Times.

Visit their website for lots of free resources at www.LesandLeslie.com

Reviews

[Thadeus · Rating 4 out of 5]

I had high expectations of this book due to the authors' reputations. It was definitely well written and holds key information to help a person understand what types of things can help you communicate better and more effectively with your loved one. This is based upon an understanding of which of four factors make you and your loved one feel emotionally safe, and putting that together with an understanding of where you are on the spectrum of four types of approaches which determine your talk style.

I think the book is summed up well in this quote from page 160:

"So Remember This:
The quiet conversation taking place in your head determines the closeness or distance you feel with each other. When your positive statements dwarf the negative, you're speaking Love Talk. When you remember your partner's personal fear factor and respect his or her emotional safety need, you are speaking Love Talk. When you intentionally respect and honor the hardwiring of your partner's talk style, you are speaking Love Talk. When you put yourself in your partner's shoes with plenty of empathy, you are speaking Love Talk. When you keep your gender differences in mind and listen with the third ear, you are speaking Love Talk. When you do any and all of these, you are speaking Love Talk. Fluently."

Recommended for those wanting to better understand the reasons behind some communication breakdowns with themselves and their loved ones.

[Timothy Hare]

The entire book is a pyramid scheme to sell more things on their website and that just feels gross. The breakdowns they tried to make were grossly over simplified and the scenarios they acted out where god awful. The book was short enough for me to get through quickly but I really feel like my time could have been much better spent reading something else. I read this book because my significant others therapist suggested it to her so i decided I would take part in it. Coincidentally she is looking for a new therapist :p

[Stella · Rating 2 out of 5]

2-3 ⭐

This book brought up some interesting conversations between my husband and I. I also enjoyed the experience of reading the book and working through the work book. However, this book seems to be quite outdated and a huge money grab. It makes many references to men being a certain way and women being a certain way. This is the 21st century 🤦. First you have to pay for the book then both workbooks and the online tool💲💲💲.

[Bible Gateway · Rating 5 out of 5]

Love Talk is like no other communication book you’ve ever read. The fruit of years of research by two foremost relationship experts (who also happen to be husband and wife), this book forges a new path to the heart of loving conversation. Read our blog post with Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott: https://bit.ly/2HlaeKi

[Fritz Duchatellier · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have read many relationship books over the years and was curious to read this book and see if there was anything new here. Like me, if you have read other relationship books, there is a lot here that you have heard before. However, what I appreciated about this book is the examples they gave for some of the ideas they are trying to share. There were a lot of good points, taken individually, that will be helpful to me (and perhaps other readers). Even if you think you have read everything there is, it is good to be open to new books because you can always pick up a new idea here and there.

That is the reason for my four stars. There were a lot of points...some I have known already and some that were either new or a new approach. This book not only gave ideas on new ways to communicate, it also shared ideas of various (perhaps subconscious) things to think about. I always try to give people new ways to look at things and this book did that for me. The reason I did not give it the full five stars was because they reference other items (workbook and online assessment) that you had to pay for additionally. If I am purchasing your book, I would expect the entire information be included.

Overall, I think Love Talk was a good read. If you are in search of new material for communicating in (or improving your communication within) your relationship, this should be helpful.

[Tiffany Tubville · Rating 4 out of 5]

I bought this book used and the website didn’t work for me to do the assessment, plus I didn’t have the workbook to complete the exercise prompts given throughout the book....so I gave it 4 stars instead of 5 because I couldn’t fully appreciate the process. I did, however, enjoy the chapters in the book and thought it was insightful of conversations within relationships. I especially liked the chapter about self-talk and how “your internal dialogue about your relationship is like a prism through which all your verbal conversations are refracted.”

[Ben Lobaugh · Rating 5 out of 5]

My wife and I read this book together for a marriage group. We got together weekly with some other couples and discussed one chapter per week. This book was easy to read and had useful examples in it that made conversation about the topic between my wife and I very easy. The group reflected on the growth in their marriage over the 14 weeks and the new tools we were equipped with have already had a big impact. This book is top five on my list of must-read books for marriage.

[Eric Reidsma · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is really set up to be used in a group setting along with their workbook and they really push their $35 online assessment tool. But I still found it very relatable with a lot of helpful information. We will be trying the mind reading game and putting some of their other recommendations into practice too.

[Uncle Gonzo · Rating 1 out of 5]

So at about the halfway point they direct you to their website to take a survey that seems really critical to understanding where you fit in to the material presented in the book. The problem is that the survey is no longer on the website and even if it were, the required passcode is not included with the audiobook.

[Lorna R · Rating 5 out of 5]

I know I will want to read this one again, and probably again. So much insight and practical ways to communicate better with a spouse or possibly even a friend. I would highly recommend you read this book right away!

[What April's Reading · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great, random conversation starters for a married couple.

[Jacqie Wheeler · Rating 3 out of 5]

Full thoughts in my wrap up video:https://youtu.be/nWn7Y_2V2rc

[Delia · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great tips!

[Charlotte ❀ · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great read!
My Fiancé and I learned a lot of tools for speaking each other’s love language and communicating effectively!

[Deanna Lilly · Rating 5 out of 5]

Amazing resource for creating a solid foundation for communication in a relationship.

[Jessica · Rating 4 out of 5]

It is a good book. It is about how women and men see things differently when they talk to each other. Example: My sisters father had put the baby asleep in his arms and my sister made the comment to here husband that the baby is asleep. To use women would mean for our husbands to take the baby and put her in the crib. But men just sees it okay they are asleep. It was funny because I was reading this bood and explained to my sister that you need to exactly need to tell them what your really mean.

It also talks about the way you say things as far as expressions and gestures and etc. and how it the other person can take it.

[Danielle · Rating 4 out of 5]

I love reading any book that can help in my relationship. I think people are so different that reading what others say can open our eyes to our own partners.

For me, I tend to not be able to relate to my BF or understand where he is coming from and books like these help me better understand his point of view.

This book talked about talking adn listening to our partners. Sometimes we tend to not hear what the other person is saying, we only focus on what we hear and most of the time it is not what the person is saying.

I loved that this book opened my eyes to talking, listening and trying to hear what my partner was saying and vice versa....now if only HE would read this book!

[Elizabeth Mulherron-Cayton · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book has a lot of helpful and relevant communication tips and techniques. I took the "Love Talk Indicator" online and found it very insightful to myself. Even as a single woman I found this book useful! I did not use the workbooks, but the exercises in them (referenced throughout the book) definitely seemed interesting and potentially very useful to a couple!

[Jenny · Rating 2 out of 5]

I didn't get a lot out of this book mostly because I was supposed to read it with my husband and do the workbooks and online assessment. Maybe if I felt like we had really big communication issues I would do all that and then I can see how this book would be a big help.

[Rebecca]

I am actually re-reading this book... did a study on it right after getting married. The authors are Christian, a husband and wife team who give seminars on marriage and communication. The book offers pretty basic advice, and is at its best when paired with the accompanying workbook.

[Lisa]

Marriage

[Juday]

Practical advice for married couples on how to communicate and what the other one is really saying.

[Jennifer · Rating 5 out of 5]

Most of the time it's not about what you say, it's about how you say it and how the other person hears it.

[Jaddeus Dempsey · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book along with DVD lessons and discussion in a small group really helped my wife and I and other couples take our communication to the next level.