Confessions of a Menopausal Woman: Everything you want to know but are too afraid to ask…

by Andrea McLean

The menopause. There - we've said it. It's a huge part of every woman's life and yet it remains one of society's last taboos. An emotionally complex issue that can trigger a whole host of physical and mental side effects, it's a big deal. So why aren't we talking about it?

Talking about stuff is what women do best; we share and offload, we laugh and we bond over the ridiculous and incredible things our bodies go through. Hearing other people's experiences is what makes our own so much more bearable - because we know that we aren't alone. This is the book that Andrea McLean wished for as she found herself in uncharted territory, grappling with the physical aftershock of a hysterectomy and the psychological fallout of a difficult menopause.

After announcing live on Loose Women that she would be absent from the screen as she recovered from surgery, Andrea was inundated with letters from other women struggling with the realities of the menopause, who were delighted that someone was finally talking openly and frankly about it. Typically candid, and including tips and tricks on diet, exercise and even your sex life, in Confessions of a Menopausal Woman Andrea brings her trademark humour and honesty to a very hot topic.

Genres: Nonfiction, Biography, Self Help, Health

256 pages, Paperback

Published April 4, 2019

Reviews

[Louise Wilson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Talking about stuff is what women do best; we share and offload, we laugh and we bond over the ridiculous and incredible things our bodies go through. Hearing other people's experiences is what makes our own more bearable.

Andrea McLean was a weather girl on the early morning British TV show GMTV before becoming a panalist on the lunch time TV show Loose Women. After it was announced live on the show that Andrea was taking eight weeks off her work to recover from getting a hysterectomy due to the fallout of a difficult menopause. Andrea was inundated with letters from women who were also struggling with the menopause. Women were delighted that someone was talking openly about it. There are parts of the letters viewers sent to Andrea included anonymously in the book of the things that were worrying them. The book includes tips and tricks on diet, exercise and even your sex life. Hopefully this book will help the women who struggle on a daily (and nightly) basis with day and night sweats, mood swings, painful and heavy periods etc. This book is by no means a cure, but it will let you know your not alone.

I would like to thank NetGalley, Random House UK, Transworld Publishers and the author Andrea McLean for my ARC in exchange for an honest review.

[Barbara · Rating 2 out of 5]

I had heard Andrea interviewed on the radio and was curious to know if this book really was going to be the answer to every woman's prayers and a source of everything she ever wanted to know about the menopause. It's not an unreasonable question - look, the promise is made in the book's title. I was curious but not curious enough to pay for it. I put myself on the waiting list for the e-book via my local library and it popped up several months ahead of original expectations - a sign that probably I'm not the only one who was ready to give it back well ahead of the allotted 3 week loan period.

It wasn't urgent for me. I'm probably not there yet but I thought it would be worth a bit of prior research but I can honestly say this book was an irritating waste of time. It was also full of doom and gloom and promises of all sorts of cr@ppy things ahead of us, with little differentiation between what happens to everybody, what happens to some, and what hardly ever happens at all. There's a whole chapter about her 'vasculitis' for goodness sake - even though she says it's very rare. Let's just stick it in there and scare some readers. There's heaps of details about the wrong sort of stuff and very little about the basics. Did I feel 'educated' or 'informed' by the time I got to the end? Sadly I didn't. I was just bored and irritated by the superficiality of it all.

Oh, and 'confessions of an unimpressed reader' : I skimmed a LOT of it because it was just such self-indulgent blah blah blah.

About half way through I stopped and thought "Hang on, all she's done so far is bang on about her hysterectomy. Is this a book about hysterectomies rather than menopause?" Sorry for your pain and anguish Andrea but I was really not interested. Then there are loads of chapters about other stuff that may well not be relevant - blah blah on anxiety which apparently she's always suffered from (again, sorry for your anguish but can we get back to the point, please?), chapter after chapter on how to have a healthy diet or do 'mindfulness meditations' (yawn, let's get a bit more specific) and praise and jubilation about HRT which many women will not want to take or will not have the option to take if they have pre-existing contra-indicators to hormone treatment.

I think she's a celebrity - honestly, I could pass her in the street without a clue who she was but I could also pass Kim Kardashian so that says more about my ignorance than her fame - and I can imagine that her viewers who feel they 'know' her may find a more authentic voice than I did. Celebrity or not, she's obviously not an expert on health issues. At times the book feels like you've fallen into a parallel universe surrounded by people who write the 'health' pages for the Daily Mail. The 'expert boxes' at the end of each chapter are probably quite useful but also rather boring.

Her highly privileged life of private doctors, top experts, botox and professional make up artists is not a life that most of us share. It's not the life I've heard of from friends who report their GPs have little or nothing to offer or just want to stick them straight onto tablets without discussing further. McLean correctly identifies that menopause is a topic we SHOULD be talking about, one about which people shouldn't be embarrassed (but are) and an area where the NHS and the media could do a lot to improve the lives of half the world's population. Sadly I don't think this particular book made any giant leaps for womankind.

Two stars rather than one but mostly because I appreciate the intent if not the actual delivery. It's good that people do make a loud noise on this topic.

[Tina Milledge · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book for it’s personal approach to life just before and during menopause. As someone going through a messy menopause after a stressful lead up to total hysterectomy I’ve read many non-fiction texts to try and find answers and an understanding of HRT options and self help suggestions, but it was so refreshing to read someone’s account instead of another self help guide or book written by a professional in this field. I’m not a huge fan of celeb books but credit where credit is due, Andrea became my bestie on the sofa over a cup of chamomile tea or three while I was reading because I don’t know many other women personally that I can talk to or empathise with who have been through many of the same experiences. Personally, I loved the writing style - sometimes you have more than enough on your plate during menopause to want to read heavier books. It’s so nice to realise you aren’t alone in how you feel and what you’ve experienced! With huge thanks to NetGalley, publisher and author for getting a book out there on the shelves for women like me and for allowing me to read a digital copy in exchange for an honest and rather hormonal review!

[Rabspur · Rating 3 out of 5]

Interesting however this is only the authors own version of what it’s like to go through the menopause, when there are millions of other sufferers around. I didn’t find the book easy to read, and didn’t agree with her recipes which were not that healthy, I think the author should stick with loose women, not that I’m a fan of that, and forget about writing.

[Sara Sutton · Rating 4 out of 5]

Lots of good tips and Doctors advice at the end of every chapter, light hearted and honest. Get talking about the menopause!

[Nicola Robson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great account of real life menopause and hysterectomy

[Michelle B · Rating 4 out of 5]

I selected this book to read as I knew Andrea had chosen to undergo a hysterectomy after years of suffering with endometriosis and as a fellow sufferer of endo, I wanted to hear her story about this. I accept that I have a particular interest in this field, but it really is a book that will appeal to a much wider audience. She deals with all of her experiences with hormones as a woman through starting periods, fertility issues, pregnancy, peri-menopause, her hysterectomy and then menopause. It is an honest and brutal account and yet incredibly funny at times. It's a book that will help men and women to understand the effects of hormones at changing stages in women's lives.
Andrea includes experiences of some of those who contacted who throughout her journey, her fellow Loose Women and some friends and family. Each chapter also ends with a doctors opinion on the topic Andrea is discussing, therefore unlike some books written by those who are famous, you feel you are getting real value for money as getting expert knowledge and opinion as well as how the author felt.
Thanks to NetGalley for a Kindle copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

[Fiona · Rating 5 out of 5]

Three weeks post hysterectomy, I'm not sure if the menopause has moved in or just visiting either way this book is very useful.
There aren't enough books tackling this stage of a woman's life. The few I've tried so far are either entirely personal so not always relatable or entirely medical so boring and confusing. McLean writes in a really engaging way, she comes across as human as the rest of us and is very honest her experiences. There's more medical information at the end of each chapter and in the appendix provided by professionals too so it feels very well balanced.
Having read this book I've got some ideas of changes I'd like to make to various aspects of my life and feel more enthusiastic about the prospect of handling this next stage of my life rather than surrendering to it.

[Helen Marquis · Rating 4 out of 5]

An awesome candid view of the menopause from the well-loved Loose Women presenter, McLean's story is an enlightening guide to what to expect as a woman, once the menopause starts to kick in.
Her writing style is just what you'd want - it feels like one of your mates talking you through what to expect - and while not every woman will go through the exact same experiences as she did, there are more general factual sections from Dr Tina Peers, giving a broader overview of what's actually going on with women's bodies at this confusing time of life. As someone on the cusp of this myself, I found this a great read and I learnt a lot. An excellent primer for all women about to embark on the Change.

[connorishere · Rating 3 out of 5]

Read it, ladies AND gentlemen.
It's an interesting read if you know anyone going through (or soon to go through) the menopause.
I think it's great that someone is raising awareness of this major part of a woman's life, as I imagine it can be a very lonely experience if you're too afraid or embarrassed to talk about it with those around you.
I'll never understand what -anonymous person- is going through, but at least I have a better idea now of what symptoms they might be experiencing, how it might change their lifestyle, and how I can support them.
The book isn't purely about the menopause. It also contains useful information on more general topics, such as mental health and nutrition, that can be applied universally.

[Beckie Malee Taylor · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved every minute of this book. It's like chewing the fat with your best mate on a night in and sharing experiences. Literally didn't want to put it down. Everyone's experience is different and not everyone can follow the same treatments/support paths shared between the pages. It's definitely worthy of a read and I'm sure everyone can empathise and/or take away something from Andrea's imparting. This is HER experience and not a self help book. It's refreshing to have someone's personal account rather than having to read medical journally type books.

[Em · Rating 3 out of 5]

A conversational style and predominantly personal account of the author’s health issues leading to a hysterectomy and resultant menopause. There are also notes to each section provided by a gynaecologist for medical advise which provide a good balance to an individual experience.

I’m lucky in that I’ve felt able to talk about my hysterectomy and the circumstances (ovarian cysts and ovarian cancer) leading to it with my family and friends. That alongside a book like this which is generally encouraging and positive has really helped me in adjusting.

[Alison Starnes · Rating 4 out of 5]

I saw this book and, being of a certain age, thought it was worth reading. At the time, I couldn't have known that barely months later, I would actually need to read it. I am glad to have done so.

Andrea McLean is known mainly for being on 'Loose Women', where well-known women chat openly about issues that affect women, including those that may be seen as taboo or best avoided in polite conversation. Menopause would definitely qualify as one of those.

Menopause is often sidelined or not discussed because it is perceived as embarrassing, but Andrea explains that it needs to be talked about and part of her writing the book was to get the subject on the table and increase understanding.

She is incredibly honest and that helps demystify the subject. Medical advice is included from a leading consultant on menopause management; however, it is important to remember that each woman is unique and therefore Andrea advises to consult your GP or a specialist doctor before undertaking any of the treatments or exercise/diet programmes mentioned.

HRT is the obvious treatment, but this will vary depending on age, body type and experience of symptoms, of which there are around 34! At every stage, it is important to listen to your body and get the correct advice for you. Above all, the message of the book is to be positive and embrace this new chapter in your life and see it as an opportunity.

I will definitely return to this book over the weeks and months ahead as I navigate my own journey through menopause, and recommend it wherever needed.

[Mrs J · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was surprised at how much I enjoyed this book. I will admit to thinking it was probably just another celeb jumping on the menopause bandwagon but it is very good and well written.

I'm sure everyone knows who Andrea McLean is so it's easy to read it in her friendly voice. She has managed to get the perfect balance between writing about her own menopause, the facts from experts, and the thoughts of other women.

It's very honest and not at all preachy like some books. There are lots of tips, but she does show that you don't have to be perfect with regards to diet and exercise. It's ok to have a little treat now and then, and you need to do what works for you with exercise. She states that sometimes she only feels like doing 5 mins, and on occasions, she will do half an hour. This is so important to read as so often we are made to feel that we must tick every box all of the time – and for most of us, that’s just not doable.

I guess this one resonated more with me having had a hysterectomy too, but there's more than enough in here to keep everyone interested. A really good read.

[Lucy Reynolds · Rating 4 out of 5]

As I have a hysterectomy scheduled soon, I was looking for a more relatable account, rather than some of the more general perfunctory Menopause books around just now but also with more detail than a panicky Facebook group can provide.
I don't watch Loose Women but was aware Andrea McLean was on it and had been a GMTV anchor so it was really more the experience of surgical hysterectomy I was looking to read about. I didn't realise, until reading, that she also had Endometriosis (as I also do aswell as a couple of other conditions which a full hsyt is recommended) - which made it even more relevant for me.
I'll be honest, I teared up a few times reading this - Andrea's concerns prior to surgery were familiar and the post-surgery experience was difficult to read about (so am steeling myself...). However, the chapters on sex, what to eat, exercise etc were all very relatable and the writing style warm and conversational.
This has been a reassuring read for me and I'll dip into it again over the coming weeks especially.

[Lisa Cramb · Rating 3 out of 5]

Of you want to know about HRT this book is great

Of however you want to know about options if you can't take HRT it is not so useful unless you are restricted to dietary only alternatives for helping with the menopause.

I enjoyed the book, however I felt it was a real promotion for HRT, which is fine, but I had expected it to have more tales of menopausal incidents where the symptoms affected Andrea's life & for their to be done helpful hints on how to cope with symptoms, without having to take medication. Perhaps home therapies & gadgets like cooling pillows, fans that spray water etc... So I was a little disappointed

[Janette · Rating 5 out of 5]

Well put together and well written, I enjoyed reading Andrea's very personal and candid account of her experience of going through the menopause. This book discusses a full range of perimenopausal and menopausal symptoms in a very honest and practical way. I found the medical know-how really useful along with personal useful tips and tricks.

A must read for any woman. This helped me to understand some of my symptoms and how to deal with them. Congratulations and thanks to Andrea for being so brave to talk about this honestly.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the opportunity to read this book in exchange for an honest review.

[Matthew Mclane · Rating 4 out of 5]

As a man in his early twenties, the advice sections of this book weren’t particularly relevant to me (although I’d imagine that for a woman who is approaching or has begun experiencing the menopause they would be invaluable) but Andrea’s account of her own experiences are so insightful.

The fact that boys aren’t taught about the menopause is one thing, but young girls’ lack of knowledge of what’s to come later in life really needs to be rectified - perhaps by reading this book?

[Tammy · Rating 4 out of 5]

I rather with there was a 3.5 rating for this book. There was some good parts to it, but it was a bit personalised in that her menopause experiences are from the viewpoint of a woman who had had an hysterectomy. She had also other female health issues in her life making her experiences a bit more unusual than the average woman going into it naturally. She does however give some good basic advice and each chapter concludes with the opinion and words from a qualified professional in the area.

[Janet Crabbe · Rating 5 out of 5]

Every woman should read this book

This book is an excellent description of a journey. A journey that every woman will under take at some point in her life. Maybe not of aspect will be the same, but the book informs in a way that is easy to understand. I have cried and laughed in equal mess but above all I have learnt. Thank you Andrea and family for being so brave and honest.

[Sue · Rating 4 out of 5]

Something for everybody.

Although it is mainly about menopause after a hysterectomy, as that is what happened to Andrea, there was still plenty of advice for everyone. There was definitely one or two ideas that I will be trying myself.

[Kate · Rating 5 out of 5]

Having lost my Mum a year ago just as I became peri menopausal this book answered so many of the questions I’d have asked her. Personally written covering topics most people don’t want to discuss. Brilliant!

[Nicola · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book head some advice and help for those who are going through menopause, but it felt more like you were just reading her problems and experiences. On the whole I wouldn't say it has helped me with my early onset on the menopause. But well written apart from that.

[Karen Keleher · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is excellently written and a must read for everyone - no matter what stage you are at. It’s really insightful and reminds you that you are not alone and your ‘symptoms’ are completely normal. Thank you Andrea McLean

[Samantha · Rating 4 out of 5]

Is was an easy read and I enjoyed it, but it’s more of a diary of Andrea’s experiences than a guide to the menopause. I don’t think it’s helped me understand what I’m starting to experience and am now trying more medical based books, written by doctors to help guide me through.

[julie fox · Rating 5 out of 5]

Refreshingly Honest

I feel after reading this book there IS hope and I'm.not alone in the daily struggles of menopause.
Thank You Andrea for sharing.
Must read for anyone who thinks their world is ending..on a daily basis!

[Sarah Kelly · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very good book. I had a hysterectomy exactly the same as Andrea and it was good to read about her experience. Lots of good advice as well as explanations from a doctor. I would recommend to any thinking they are going through the menopause under any circumstances.

[Chickpea · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is a great account for women who need a hysterectomy. She writes a diary to explain what she goes through over that time.
So tips and helpful hints as to what worked for her during menopause.

[Ruth · Rating 3 out of 5]

It was just good to know that so many women going through similar emotions etc.
Not sure i would follow all her tips but did make me feel less alone.

[Angela Marie Clavering · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent and informative book about this not talked about enough subject.