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Barney Thomson #8
Aye, Barney
A MACABRE, PITCH-BLACK, BLOODY MURDER COMEDY. WITH FLESH-EATING WORMS. “Lindsay has a real ear for dialogue and a highly visual imagination.” - SUNDAY MIRROR Something is rotten in the town of Millport. Plans are being made, money is being thrown around, an empire is being built… and people are getting murdered. A man has a stiletto thrust into his eye socket, another his windpipe brutally squeezed shut, whilst a kidnapped youth lies curled in a cage, unaware of what it is that lives inside him. Meanwhile, at the local barbershop, Barney Thomson lives a quiet life, cutting hair, wishing his customers would stop talking, and happy that he doesn’t seem to be involved in the latest calamity to be visited upon the town. Yet Barney is haunted, his life forever plagued by psychopaths and murderers, and soon enough he is being drawn into the very heart of the horror, as Millport is once again plunged into the nightmare world of the serial killer... Contains 134 uses of the word 'fuck', 8 'cunts', 18 'bastards', and 7 'Trumps'. Praise for Barney Thomson “Gleefully macabre, hugely enjoyable black burlesque.” The Scotsman “Gloriously over the tope, very bloody, and very, very funny.” The Daily Telegraph “Highly entertaining black comedy.” Heat “Another great instalment in what is becoming a cult series.” Booklore “Satisfyingly surreal.” Birmingham Post “A mad, macabre romp with surreal characters and cutting black humour.” The Sunday Mirror “This is extremely well-written, highly amusing and completely unpredictable in its outrageous plot twists and turns.” The List “With classic timing and delight in the grotesque, Lindsay has crafted a macabre masterpiece where content lives up to style.” What’s On
300 pages, Kindle Edition
Published September 23, 2018
7 people are currently reading
16 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews
April 25, 2019
I’m barging into Barney Thomson’s story eight books in, but I still felt immediately at home with Aye, Barney.
Barney is a barber in Millport on the Scottish island of Cumbrae. I get the impression that Barney has found himself in proximity to violent crime a number of times in the past but now he is hoping for a tranquil life with his companions at the barbershop, Keanu and Igor, and his police officer partner, Monk.
However, a predatory businessman by the name of Crane, with a hyperbolic turn of phrase and a confected combover, is trying to take over the island. He wants to build a resort, complete with golf course. He’s even talking about independence – not of Scotland but of Cumbrae itself.
Then the (brutal but highly imaginative) killings start. Are Crane and his people to blame? Monk finally has a case worthy of her talents to investigate.
Barney’s is a strange and wonderful world. It is both comic and macabre. It fizzes with cultural references while affectionately parodying small-town life. The conversation between Barney, Keanu and Igor ranges from the philosophical to the absurd – and look out for the characters’ names!
Beneath it all there is a gentle melancholy as the peace which Barney seeks eludes him, even in this remote and beautiful place.
*
Read more of my reviews at https://katevane.com
Barney is a barber in Millport on the Scottish island of Cumbrae. I get the impression that Barney has found himself in proximity to violent crime a number of times in the past but now he is hoping for a tranquil life with his companions at the barbershop, Keanu and Igor, and his police officer partner, Monk.
However, a predatory businessman by the name of Crane, with a hyperbolic turn of phrase and a confected combover, is trying to take over the island. He wants to build a resort, complete with golf course. He’s even talking about independence – not of Scotland but of Cumbrae itself.
Then the (brutal but highly imaginative) killings start. Are Crane and his people to blame? Monk finally has a case worthy of her talents to investigate.
Barney’s is a strange and wonderful world. It is both comic and macabre. It fizzes with cultural references while affectionately parodying small-town life. The conversation between Barney, Keanu and Igor ranges from the philosophical to the absurd – and look out for the characters’ names!
Beneath it all there is a gentle melancholy as the peace which Barney seeks eludes him, even in this remote and beautiful place.
*
Read more of my reviews at https://katevane.com
November 12, 2018
Not Arf Baked! (worm your way out of that one!)
i was very lucky, in that i was granted an audience with igor during which he dictated to me the full plot synopsis and detailed minutiae of all aspects of the story, explaining the methodologies that went into its creation and the workings of the author's tortured mind, but it all came out as 'arf', so you'll just need to buy it yourself.....
...which is an easy purchase to make if you've followed the saga through the seven previous installments. this is an unexpected but totally welcome addition to the series (having believed the 7th was the final 'cut'), the quality intact. there is a great cinematic aspect to these adventures, i'd say at least 5 of the 7 follow-ups would transfer easily to the screen, this one included!
anyhoo, millport is again heaving with multiple murders, but this time barney is a little concerned that he has no direct involvement in these - so what should he do but make sure he has! he can't help himself! and still finds time to deliver primo haircuts to the locals. but will he learn the lesson that is 'no matter how hungry you are, don't eat the worms?' read on!
i was very lucky, in that i was granted an audience with igor during which he dictated to me the full plot synopsis and detailed minutiae of all aspects of the story, explaining the methodologies that went into its creation and the workings of the author's tortured mind, but it all came out as 'arf', so you'll just need to buy it yourself.....
...which is an easy purchase to make if you've followed the saga through the seven previous installments. this is an unexpected but totally welcome addition to the series (having believed the 7th was the final 'cut'), the quality intact. there is a great cinematic aspect to these adventures, i'd say at least 5 of the 7 follow-ups would transfer easily to the screen, this one included!
anyhoo, millport is again heaving with multiple murders, but this time barney is a little concerned that he has no direct involvement in these - so what should he do but make sure he has! he can't help himself! and still finds time to deliver primo haircuts to the locals. but will he learn the lesson that is 'no matter how hungry you are, don't eat the worms?' read on!
September 27, 2022
Hard to believe that I have read 8 of the 9 (so far) books in this entertaining series by Douglas Lindsay. This installment was a quick and fun read from the get-go, with familiar characters, new arrivals worth despising, quirky and inventive dialog, and some suspense involving hired killers and invertebrates.
My only criticism is a common one: how to end a book without advertising that the book is ending! In this case, the main cast is brought together for mutual but strained banter, and Lindsay suggests the fates of the criminals. The ending could have focused exclusively on Monk's reflections and been much more satisfying and speculative. But overall a fun read, and I look forward to reading the next book in this unique series.
My only criticism is a common one: how to end a book without advertising that the book is ending! In this case, the main cast is brought together for mutual but strained banter, and Lindsay suggests the fates of the criminals. The ending could have focused exclusively on Monk's reflections and been much more satisfying and speculative. But overall a fun read, and I look forward to reading the next book in this unique series.
August 18, 2024
Darkly comedic about Strange haired thugs & other reptiles and predators
It's post COVID time, and life goes on, but will the greedy bastards leave the peaceful town of Whatever alone so its citizens can live the lives they've chosen? Of course not, they must all be made great again... or in Millport's case, perhaps just remade into a Vegas-Branson-KeyWest touristy version that no one would recognize as Millport. Who cares? Well, let's just see how the wee town of Millport reasons to that... and even though Barney isn't part of that narrative, what happens when he decides he wants to be? It's another whodunnit, and who-eats-worms, but then who doesn't?
It's post COVID time, and life goes on, but will the greedy bastards leave the peaceful town of Whatever alone so its citizens can live the lives they've chosen? Of course not, they must all be made great again... or in Millport's case, perhaps just remade into a Vegas-Branson-KeyWest touristy version that no one would recognize as Millport. Who cares? Well, let's just see how the wee town of Millport reasons to that... and even though Barney isn't part of that narrative, what happens when he decides he wants to be? It's another whodunnit, and who-eats-worms, but then who doesn't?
September 30, 2018
Great to have Barney and his mates back. Just as good as all the others, looking forward to book nine!
November 13, 2018
Another cracker from one of my favourite authors with one of my favourite protagonists (and his mates). I can see great things ahead for Princess Snowflake. Loved it... Welcome back Barney!
December 5, 2019
A cut above the rest
Please sir can we have some more.
Only one thing that is left to say and that is fact you know what i mean.
Please sir can we have some more.
Only one thing that is left to say and that is fact you know what i mean.
Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews