A combination of deeply intimate memoirs and confessions that are powerfully engaging "Here I am, a fucked, crazy, anorexic-alcoholic-childless, beautiful woman. I never dreamt it would be like this." Tracey Emin's "Strangeland" is her own space, lying between the Margate of her childhood, the Turkey of her forefathers, and her own, private-public life in present-day London. Her writings, a combination of memoirs and confessions, are deeply intimate, yet powerfully engaging. Tracey retains a profoundly romantic world view, paired with an uncompromising honesty. Her capacity both to create controversies and to strike chords is unequaled. It is a remarkable book—and an original, beautiful mind.
Woke up having sex - with a terrible hangover. Ran to the bathroom to throw up, shitting at the same time, holding on to the pan. Small white balls of foamy stuff cascading out of my mouth. My whole body shaking. My eyes about to burst, swearing to God I would never drink again. I threw up nine more times during the day.
Saturday and Sunday
Spent the whole weekend in bed, depressed and trying to recover, with a throbbing tooth and scabs breaking out all over my chin.
Monday
Woke up with a horrendous toothache. Took fifty painkillers and dabbed on a ton of oil of cloves. Went to pick up my pills too late; and too late by two fucking hours for the morning-after pill. Had to be fitted with an IUD: a piece of copper wire wrapped around a plastic hook. Indescribable pain as it was pushed into the neck of my womb. Told it could be taken out in a weekand I would not be pregnant.
Tuesday
Woke up sad. Went to St. Thomas's Hospital for a lung scan and a chest medical. Was told I had emphysema. Kept a copy of my breathing test. It amused me, a drawing made of my own breath. Still felt terribly low, knowing that I could end up in an iron lung.
Wednesday
The pain in my mouth was unbearable. Went to the dentist. By now, the oil of cloves had burnt my gums. I had an abcess and a totally fucked tooth that had to be removed. The dentist gave me some antibiotics - and a cast of my own teeth.
Thursday
Couldn't believe it was only a week ago that I went out and had a good time.
I read this book in one sitting and found it, for the most part, quite disturbing, and partly entertaining and also in parts quite dull. Emin writes this book with a painful honesty and a navity that both devalues it's literary worth and paradoxcally makes it all the more interesting. I enjoyed her style of writing and the book had a good voice in parts. It is all out there for thoose that want to read it. She has led an interesting life and she will continue to do so. It is, however, shocking to discover that so many female readers relate to this work, bearing in mind the blunt scenes of sexual abuse that the author describes. This is not a book that is easy to put down. That said, I would venture to suggest that had this book not been written by an established artist, then it would have never been published. This does not mean that book is not worth reading. On the contary, it just means that you have to put the story into context with who she is. If you Enjoy Emin's art then you must buy this book. If you are interested in her as a person, than borrow it from a friend
I've slagged her Tracey Emin and put her into the same kind of "bad post modern artist" category as Damien Hirst or any of the other Turner prize winning 90s Cool Britannia crowd... though at other times I've felt like Emin stands apart from those guys because her art is so personal; full of lost love, fragility and brutally gross honesty. This is all carried forward in her writing and has the same immediate style as her art work, there's no wasted words and the prose has an economy to it. It reads a bit like Salinger, as she chronicles events from her late teens and early adulthood. There's a sense of lostness and of grasping for something bigger. Definitely worth a read even if you hate Tracey Emin, as maybe you'll end up liking her more by the end of it... or maybe you'll find even more reasons to hate her. Either way you'll get something out of it.
I find it almost ironic how majority of the people who hate this book don’t understand who the author is as an actual respected artist. She really cannibalized Kathy Acker here and made it her own, for people who do not know who Kathy Acker is I really suggest reading her before picking this up (to get an understanding of this kind of writing first) This is not meant to read as a traditional memoir and if that’s your expectation then you will be disappointed. Another one of those books that require you to put any and all pre conceptions of genres to rest before you open it because it is disturbing.
Some interesting anecdotes—but as typical of inexperienced memoir writers, Emin thinks she can just hand you a list of all the messed-up stuff that happened to her and automatically generate sympathy.
I mean, that is a real thing. The more messed-up the life, the more forgivable readers are of flat prose. Mary Karr is apparently a good writer but I couldn't find one interesting thing that had happened to her in the first 50 pages of The Liar's Club so I suppose that's where good prose supplants uneventfulness.
Some books are crucial at certain points in your life, and this was one of those for me. I stumbled upon this book in the library when I was studying an Arts degree in the country. It was a strange – and possibly the most detrimental – time of my life, where I was growing into an adult woman. I had begun experiencing a great amount of conflicting emotions due to a big break-up, isolation from my home-town, and the painfully new feeling of ‘fending for myself’. This book was an absolute awakening for me in many ways, it was my first real insight into feminism, poverty, privilege, misogyny, life as a young woman in the world. This book became one of my favourites all those years ago – so recently I decided to re-read it and see how my perception of it had changed. I was rather pleased to discover that it was still as impactful now as it had been all those years ago.
Strangeland is a memoir, separated into three parts: Motherland, Fatherland and Traceyland. It is an array of recollections, stories and musings describing certain pivotal moments in Emin’s life, some of which are utterly unimaginable. Starting at Motherland, we get an insight into the rape and abuse she experienced as a young child whilst living in poverty, which is incredibly intense and difficult to stomach. Fatherland takes us through Emin’s Turkish culture, exploring the history and tradition of her fathers roots, including brief mentions of her Sudanese Grandfather. Emin has experienced an abnormal amount of misfortune in her life, especially as a young woman – even within this more cultural section of the book, she deals with issues that most young people will never face – including her father’s interest in marrying a 16 year old girl, whilst in his 60’s.
Finally we arrive at Traceyland, a place where Emin is completely herself, in all her feminist, artistic glory. In this section, I noticed a tone which is representative of the current #metoo movement, where Emin discusses the fact that ‘no means no’ and other ways in which men abuse power. The female body is a battleground as a young woman, and Emin explores this within her writing. There is a whole chapter titled ‘Advice on Unwanted Pregnancy’s’, including how to avoid them but also how to deal with them, and be kind to yourself during such an isolating time. Traceyland also explores the dichotomy that is the pain of being a tortured artist, whilst art has also saved her.
Strangeland is certainly not for the faint of heart, it combines lucid dreaming, disjointed essays, poetry and musings into one conglomerate of chapters that delve deep into Emin’s life. I’m glad I discovered this book at a pivotal point of my life, and that I was able to revisit it without disappointment. Emin is certainly not literary, but she can write an engaging and eye opening memoir.
This book was a slight disappointment, if I am being completely honest. I was really excited at the prospect of delving into the mind of one of the most questionable artists the 21st Century has seen; I couldn't wait to read the lines that she'd penned describing her inspiration and her struggles. What I read however, were words written by a tragic wannabe. Every page reeked of the need for approval, for us to be impressed by her: like a year 11 school-girl who thinks she's the coolest kid because she drinks vodka and shags older guys, she smirks because she thinks she's edgy and way more mature than everyone else. It's this sort of prose that makes 'Strangeland' read like the creative writing project of a GCSE English class. The writing itself is okay, I was probably expecting a little too much but as Emin is one of the most creative minds of this century, I was expecting her words to be a little more... special. So much more could have been done to make this more eloquent, although maybe that was the point: that she doesn't need to try hard to impress us any more. I found it difficult to empathise with a woman who took pride in the fact that she encouraged men to cheat on their husbands, and yet longs so desperately for a stable relationship. I also found the constant references to sex tedious after the first fifty pages - yes, we get it, you've slept around! You've been "fucked" every way possible, congratulations! To me, this just seemed like a book written by someone who can only get gratification by rolling her Kohl rimmed eyes, downing a bottle of vodka and telling me I don't understand because I'm too mainstream.
This was nothing new to me. As a fan of Emin, I knew what to expect and that's what I got. It was simply a piece of her artwork, but in writing. A collection of her memories and past experiences, especially focusing on her abuse and abortions. What I liked about this, and why I love her art, is that it is raw, truthful (however awful it may be) explicit and she allows herself to be completely exposed. I found the book to have some interesting messages, but I was disappointed that she didn't mention art more.
“…I wasn’t a kid. I was thirteen: I had been raped, I had lost my front teeth and I had suffered disillusionment with life. But I knew there was something better: there was an outside – an outside of me. And somewhere that wasn’t Margate.
Yet I owe so much to that place I grew up, mainly because it is so beautiful. And what is so fantastic and beautiful is the sunset, and that is free.”
Tracey Emin, Britain’s art enfant terrible, catapulted into public consciousness in the 1990’s. With her came individuality and absolutely no fucks given – a figurehead of the British art scene that was still largely made up of white, middle-class men. Part of an artistic cohort dubbed Young British Artists, her greatest influences were sex, drugs and the body – and this is certainly a key theme throughout Strangeland. But with this, so often comes deeper, darker tales that are largely left out of the narrative, but not for Tracey. It should be noted from the offset that Emin writes about rape and abortion throughout, often making for a confronting read with these darker undertones of trauma always pushing to the surface.
The book is split into thirds, beginning with ‘Motherland’. Set largely against the backdrop of Margate, a derelict seaside town that serves almost as a time capsule to times gone by, Tracey details her formative years with searing honesty and unflinching detail. And yet, so much of what she has written is cryptic, teetering on the poetic and at times totally disorientating. Made up of short, sharp chapters which serve as mini vignettes to crucial memories, you get the impression at times that what may seem like an inconsequential event is actually vital in understanding the woman she is today. However, most of this initial chapter gives us an insight into the difficult start to life she had and provides a clear understanding of how she came to be the artist famed for her searing honesty today.
She records a lot of her dream sequences throughout, particularly in the second part of the book, ‘Fatherland’, which I enjoyed the least. This chapter details the relationship she has with her Turkish father and the years she spent in his homeland with him. Most of this section felt like retelling of traditional fables whilst speaking largely in code, embellished with Tracey’s signature anguish and trauma. It felt like I was on my own hedonistic trip reading much of this section and I was glad when I made it through to ‘Traceyland’, the final part of her story. But perhaps Emin says it best when she later writes about her storytelling: “I tried to tell people about it, but I was drunk: they thought I was talking in riddles or metaphors.”
The third section of her memoir is perhaps the most confessional of the modern artist we know from her work, yet that is the one glaring facet that is left out of her writing - her art. If you wanted to know what it’s like to be nominated for the Turner Prize, or how it feels to have your art bought for £2.5 million and displayed in a Charles Saatchi exhibition at the Royal Academy of London, I’m afraid this isn’t the book for you. This certainly isn’t an entry into understanding Emin, and I would advise reading past interviews or write ups about her before picking up this.
However, I couldn’t help but think this was the style of autobiography or memoir that I would like to write; elusive and protective of privacy, whilst refusing to shy away from the intimate details of tragedy that has come to hallmark her life. It’s poetic, but straight to the heart and although it might leave more questions than answers, it is utterly authentic and reflective of Emin and her art. Much like her neon lights, it is revealing in its simplicity, and yet still personal in its complexity.
Ultimately, despite being left feeling the need to learn more, more, more about Emin, I really enjoyed this book, especially as I first picked it up in Margate so felt some understanding of the landscape that shaped the woman, and who in turn has come to leave an indelible mark on this little seaside town. Truth is certainly a survival tactic for Emin and her ability to be unflinching in her honesty and introspection of her life is something to both admired and revered.
Tracey is quoted as once saying: “I don’t think I’m visually the best artist in the world, right? (…) But when it comes to words, I have a uniqueness that I find almost impossible in terms of art - and it's my words that actually make my art quite unique.” This can certainly be true for the literary individuality of Strangeland.
What a wonderfull and unexpected purchase from an art gallery in York. Incredibly engaging and strangely beutiful. Inspiring, revealing and intimate memoir of an artist. "Have you ever longed for someone so much, so deeply that you thought you would die? (...) I am longing now, but for whom I don't know."
Muy buen libro. Mejora cuando se le dejar reposar un poco. Se divide en tres partes: la madre, el padre y ella. Cuesta pillarle un poco el punto a esa división, pero creo que, en general, es un libro que merece la pena. Muy buena recomendación del podcast Deforme Semanal Ideal Total.
joder tracey, m has destrozado noviembre, pero eso no es malo. todavia me acuerdo con 18 años cuando entré en la tate y vi tu tienda de campaña, me acuerdo d imagenes q veia en el ordenador de mi padre de tus cartas escritas en neon, y de lo desgarrador q fue ver tus videos, me acompañaste y tu vulnerabilidad radical me acompaña a dia de hoy y obviamente tu identidad me empapa y euforiza, a pesar d lo lejos q estoy d vivir lo que has vivido aunq puedo estar cerca de muchos sentimientos y penas y culpas, gracias, te quiero.
gracias lara por dejarmelo, y leer tus notas y subrayados me han acercado a ti jj
I imagine if I met Tracey Emin, I would find her to be "too much". I also imagine, if she met me, Tracey Emin would find me intolerably boring. Based on this book, I think I'd like her anyway.
Before reading Strangeland, my knowledge of Tracey Emin only extended to her popular My Bed art installation and her Books Are My Bag collab, so this was really interesting to find out more through her own collection of thoughts in a memoir style book.
This is a very honest recount of some of Tracey’s life, separated into Motherland, Fatherland, and Traceyland. Throughout the collection of her musings and recollections she highlights highs and lows of her childhood, including poverty, abuse and rape. Places are given high importance in her memories, specifically Margate - a place close to her heart for many reasons.
This book isn’t an easy read for some of the themes - abuse, poverty, abortion among others. It was interesting to learn about Emin and what makes her an individual and ‘don’t give a fuck’ attitude.
I feel like this is a read if you like ‘Just Kids’ by Patti Smith or ‘The Ragged Grace’ by Octavia Bright.
I had never looked at much of any of Emin's art other than an installation she did of a hideous bedside, and a project in which she locked herself within a room to create for days. She writes just as blatantly of the horrific happenings within her life, as what seem to be some of the peaks. It's highly entertaining.
The dreams she describes do live within Strangeland. And I think it all stems from her ability to abide so strongly by herself. I feel as though it's not only her out of sorts way of life (& life experiences) and unhealthy habits that produce her level of creativity, but also her oddly practical ability to detest others' perceptions of her.
It's all sort of childlike. I mean that as a compliment.
I enjoyed it mostly, I didn't care much for her talking about how she had big balls.
“Margate’s never been easy, always hard, ‘If you want a dirty weekend, go to Margate,’ I always say. You can be as dirty as you like. Van Gogh and Turner, Ronnie Biggs and the Krays all went there. Romans, Vikings, Hell’s Angels, teds, mods, rockers and punks, they all fought there”
This is one of those memoirs that grabs you by the throat early on and rarely lets up ‘til the end. A series of ragged recollections retold with painful clarity. Regardless of what anyone may think of Emin’s artwork you have to say that she can write. This seethes with sharp insights, acerbic wit and tight eloquence and is a pure pleasure to read.
Mörk. Om uppväxten i Margate, en seaside town that they forgot to close down. Inte utan ljuspunkter, som att känna sig "wild and free" och "independent", det litterära uppvaknandet, katter, dagdrömnar och att vara "the George Best of the art world".
After seeing an inspiring interview with Tracy recently, I quite fancied some potty mouthed - childhood trauma - contemporary art action. :) this book doesn’t disappoint ! Gory, explicit and with a surprise, intrepid trip around Turkey too as an added bonus.