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When I Walk Through That Door, I Am: An Immigrant Mother's Quest
Poet-activist Jimmy Baca immerses the reader in an epic narrative poem, imagining the experience of motherhood in the context of immigration, family separation, and ICE raids on the Southern border.
Jimmy Santiago Baca makes the immigration crisis painfully personal in this new interpretation of the Epic Poem. While it may feel safest to take a step back when the government calls to "build that wall," Baca steps forward into the lives of those who suffer profoundly at the hands of Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) agents. In language we can all understand, Baca sends us on a journey with Sophia, an El Salvadorian mother searching for a better life. She takes step after painful step up a mountain of obstacles, carrying with her the burden of all that has come before: past her husband's murder, through her searing grief, to the wrenching separation from her young son at the border, then rape and abuse at the hands of American officials; always onward, exhaustively. "I keep walking/carrying you in my thoughts," she wills her boy, so far away, to know she is coming.
When I Walk Through That Door, I Am is a call for our attention, for our compassion, for our energy in pursuit of democracy and of justice. Jimmy Santiago Baca shines this light on America's downtrodden, and asks us to walk through their pain with them. "They don't see/democracy's body/on the barbwire," he writes. Through this book we do.
Jimmy Santiago Baca makes the immigration crisis painfully personal in this new interpretation of the Epic Poem. While it may feel safest to take a step back when the government calls to "build that wall," Baca steps forward into the lives of those who suffer profoundly at the hands of Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) agents. In language we can all understand, Baca sends us on a journey with Sophia, an El Salvadorian mother searching for a better life. She takes step after painful step up a mountain of obstacles, carrying with her the burden of all that has come before: past her husband's murder, through her searing grief, to the wrenching separation from her young son at the border, then rape and abuse at the hands of American officials; always onward, exhaustively. "I keep walking/carrying you in my thoughts," she wills her boy, so far away, to know she is coming.
When I Walk Through That Door, I Am is a call for our attention, for our compassion, for our energy in pursuit of democracy and of justice. Jimmy Santiago Baca shines this light on America's downtrodden, and asks us to walk through their pain with them. "They don't see/democracy's body/on the barbwire," he writes. Through this book we do.
74 pages, Paperback
First published February 19, 2019
8 people are currently reading
1015 people want to read
About the author
Jimmy Santiago Baca
64 books193 followersJimmy Santiago Baca of Apache and Chicano descent is an American poet and writer.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 60 reviews
February 26, 2019
I watched a show, Frontline, on PBS last week. It was about Long Island, and the El Salvadorian gangs that are creating terror in the hearts of many. Murder by machete being their game of choice. The Mayor has vowed to rid the city of these gangs doing whatever it takes. Apparently there is a large El Salvadorian community, and all of them are not gang members. In fact many of them are young, yes probably illegal young men trying to get an education, but regardless they are being picked up by ICE, disappeared in effect, guilty until proven innocent, parents, gaurdians not notified, have no idea where they are taken. One young man, 15 was taken across country, put in isolation in some prison or other, and tried to take his own life. So sad, sometimes I'm not sure what country I'm living in.
Anyway saw this book, a narrative poem about an El Salvadorian woman who takes her four year old and flees her country. Her husband having been murdered by the gangs who prey on the innocent. She asks for asylum, and after a long trip where horrible things happened to her, finds her son taken away from her, and more terrible things for her to withstand. This is her story, and though not very long it is very powerful. The authors note books end explains why he felt compelled to write this, and that story is equally stirring. I sometimes feel as if I should quit reading these emotionally difficult books, but find I cannot hide my head in the sand. These things are happening, they are happening here, and there is so little one can do, regardless of how one feels. That is sad too.
Anyway saw this book, a narrative poem about an El Salvadorian woman who takes her four year old and flees her country. Her husband having been murdered by the gangs who prey on the innocent. She asks for asylum, and after a long trip where horrible things happened to her, finds her son taken away from her, and more terrible things for her to withstand. This is her story, and though not very long it is very powerful. The authors note books end explains why he felt compelled to write this, and that story is equally stirring. I sometimes feel as if I should quit reading these emotionally difficult books, but find I cannot hide my head in the sand. These things are happening, they are happening here, and there is so little one can do, regardless of how one feels. That is sad too.
April 29, 2019
I received this book for free through LibraryThing’s Early Reviewers in exchange for an honest review.
This was a very powerful narrative poem that deals with immigration into the U.S. from South America.
I love narrative poems. I think they are such a creative way to tell a story and it worked well for this particular story and message The author really put you into the main character’s head and you got to know her thoughts and feelings in an intimate way. There are just some things you can do in poetry that you can’t necessarily do with prose, so this was a successful way of telling this story.
I do have a few minor critiques of the book. One being that it felt a tad bit over the top and dramatic which made parts of it unbelievable. The second critique is that I wanted more. I was super into the story and then it just kind of ended. Certain parts could have been fleshed out more to give it even more depth.
Lastly, I loved the author’s note at the end where he talks about his experience with a Burmese refugee. It was a very touching story. I kind of wish that he had written the book about him instead of creating a something new. There was something very special about their friendship.
Overall, this is an important and beautifully written read that highlights the difficulties that many South American immigrants face when trying to come into the U.S.
This was a very powerful narrative poem that deals with immigration into the U.S. from South America.
I love narrative poems. I think they are such a creative way to tell a story and it worked well for this particular story and message The author really put you into the main character’s head and you got to know her thoughts and feelings in an intimate way. There are just some things you can do in poetry that you can’t necessarily do with prose, so this was a successful way of telling this story.
I do have a few minor critiques of the book. One being that it felt a tad bit over the top and dramatic which made parts of it unbelievable. The second critique is that I wanted more. I was super into the story and then it just kind of ended. Certain parts could have been fleshed out more to give it even more depth.
Lastly, I loved the author’s note at the end where he talks about his experience with a Burmese refugee. It was a very touching story. I kind of wish that he had written the book about him instead of creating a something new. There was something very special about their friendship.
Overall, this is an important and beautifully written read that highlights the difficulties that many South American immigrants face when trying to come into the U.S.
December 15, 2023
Heartbreaking look at what a mother must endure as she tries to make a better life for herself and her son after her husband is murdered - powerful and timely. So often we just look at numbers when questions about immigration come up; but behind those numbers are real people who are trying to overcome almost impossible odds to find a better life. This book addresses this issue in a striking way.
July 24, 2019
A narrative poem that gives heart and soul to the refugee crisis that no sterile headline or soundbite can. Baca creates the journey of Sophia, a Salvadorean woman who comes to America only to be separated from her child and imprisoned. Part II of the book tells of Baca's inspiration for this poem by describing his own experience of sponsoring a refugee and his family from Burma/Myanmar. A slim but mighty volume.
Read
July 29, 2024Read for my poetry book club…curious what others will say, but this was a little too on the nose for my taste. Feels like it’s trying too hard to evoke an emotional response by including shocking detail after shocking detail. Javier Zamora does it better, I think—more artful and subtle and authentic.
November 8, 2025
The second novella I read this fall with former colleagues was published in 2019, but could be an account of massive illegal deportations in 2025 under Donald Trump. The parallels and/or the ramped up level of cruelties and fear and ignorance are impossible to ignore.
The structure of the novella is a triumph, a contemporary adaptation of the epic poem, and students of literature will appreciate that. The power of the poem, however, is embedded in the protagonist, really the heroine, Sophia, a refugee from El Salvador whose husband, Tonal, has been murdered, her son, Joaquin, kidnapped, and who is repeatedly raped and abused by ICE. Her story, always looking for her son, fighting for survival, responding to incessant racism and ignorance about immigrants, is hard to read. “The stones and dirt witness/The stones ask/The stones take/The stones tell/Lay on us, We will absorb your sadness.”
“I keep walking/carrying you in my thoughts/I feel I am walking up a mountain. I will find you.”
The author’s personal witness and notes are even more powerful, honoring the importance of immigrants in our history, in the present day, what they have given us, and what they have taught us about justice, peace, Democracy, building community. I have used a few of those pages to start my mornings on brutal news days to remind me we are better than this, we must do better.
The structure of the novella is a triumph, a contemporary adaptation of the epic poem, and students of literature will appreciate that. The power of the poem, however, is embedded in the protagonist, really the heroine, Sophia, a refugee from El Salvador whose husband, Tonal, has been murdered, her son, Joaquin, kidnapped, and who is repeatedly raped and abused by ICE. Her story, always looking for her son, fighting for survival, responding to incessant racism and ignorance about immigrants, is hard to read. “The stones and dirt witness/The stones ask/The stones take/The stones tell/Lay on us, We will absorb your sadness.”
“I keep walking/carrying you in my thoughts/I feel I am walking up a mountain. I will find you.”
The author’s personal witness and notes are even more powerful, honoring the importance of immigrants in our history, in the present day, what they have given us, and what they have taught us about justice, peace, Democracy, building community. I have used a few of those pages to start my mornings on brutal news days to remind me we are better than this, we must do better.
December 4, 2018
This is a narrative poem telling the story of an El Salvadoran woman who is separated from her child after illegally immigrating to the United States. It’s quite a timely topic, but as a work of literature and a “call to arms” it could have done much better.
This poetic novella is gripping to read, but is over-the-top in spots, and that does it a disservice in two ways. First of all, it takes the reader out of the story as they may become lost in the disbelief. Secondly, it takes a work that could have been a persuasive call for change, and turns it into an angry rant. To give a prime example, at one point early in the piece, the lead character has been (gang-)raped four or five times over the course of two pages, by varied factions including US law enforcement officers. Even if one were to accept the author’s presumed premise that American federal law enforcement agents are morally equivalent to the gangs of the drug cartels (a premise not likely to be accepted by the meaty-middle of society), one is left to ignore the fact that female prisoners, once in custody, aren’t left unsupervised with male guards. I know the reader may say, but this is a technical detail in a fictitious narrative poem. However, given the way the piece is presented (discussed more below), it reads like it’s telling us a story that is meant to move us through the proposition that this is the world in which we live. But once one reads one falsity, one is left wondering whether any part of the story is reflective of reality.
The idea that this woman is exploited by every male she comes into contact with, whether they are gang members or Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) agents, has poetic merit. It’s pointing out that without legal status, she is in a perpetually vulnerable state. Yet, it seems lazy and sensationalist to make all such exploitation rape. When one morally equates gangs with agents of a democratic government, one isn’t just saying that the individuals are equivalent, you are casting aspersions against the entire system of rule of law. (Because, of course, protections should be in place, and -- failing them -- the means to lodge complaints. And I think most would argue that both are the case.) The bigger problem, one found throughout the political spectrum in the US, is that individuals vilify each other, pretending they are being persuasive, when in reality they are just more deeply etching an “us-them” divide. By this I mean to say, one can’t tell people how vile, despicable, and evil they are, and then expect them to see your perspective.
The narrative poem is delivered in a combination of free verse and poetic prose all of which verges largely on just plain prose. That is to say, the emphasis is on telling a story and not so much on the usual core components of poetry, i.e. sound, imagery, and metaphor. (Unless some of these fictitious elements, e.g. the astounding number of rapes, are meant to be metaphorical. Then my concern would be that one risks diminishing a horrible thing, if one throws around that word as metaphor.)
This is a quick read, and, as I mentioned, it’s presented in a gripping fashion – if hyperbolicly so. I suspect that it will be mostly read by a demographic determined along political lines, which is a shame. It could have been so much more.
This poetic novella is gripping to read, but is over-the-top in spots, and that does it a disservice in two ways. First of all, it takes the reader out of the story as they may become lost in the disbelief. Secondly, it takes a work that could have been a persuasive call for change, and turns it into an angry rant. To give a prime example, at one point early in the piece, the lead character has been (gang-)raped four or five times over the course of two pages, by varied factions including US law enforcement officers. Even if one were to accept the author’s presumed premise that American federal law enforcement agents are morally equivalent to the gangs of the drug cartels (a premise not likely to be accepted by the meaty-middle of society), one is left to ignore the fact that female prisoners, once in custody, aren’t left unsupervised with male guards. I know the reader may say, but this is a technical detail in a fictitious narrative poem. However, given the way the piece is presented (discussed more below), it reads like it’s telling us a story that is meant to move us through the proposition that this is the world in which we live. But once one reads one falsity, one is left wondering whether any part of the story is reflective of reality.
The idea that this woman is exploited by every male she comes into contact with, whether they are gang members or Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) agents, has poetic merit. It’s pointing out that without legal status, she is in a perpetually vulnerable state. Yet, it seems lazy and sensationalist to make all such exploitation rape. When one morally equates gangs with agents of a democratic government, one isn’t just saying that the individuals are equivalent, you are casting aspersions against the entire system of rule of law. (Because, of course, protections should be in place, and -- failing them -- the means to lodge complaints. And I think most would argue that both are the case.) The bigger problem, one found throughout the political spectrum in the US, is that individuals vilify each other, pretending they are being persuasive, when in reality they are just more deeply etching an “us-them” divide. By this I mean to say, one can’t tell people how vile, despicable, and evil they are, and then expect them to see your perspective.
The narrative poem is delivered in a combination of free verse and poetic prose all of which verges largely on just plain prose. That is to say, the emphasis is on telling a story and not so much on the usual core components of poetry, i.e. sound, imagery, and metaphor. (Unless some of these fictitious elements, e.g. the astounding number of rapes, are meant to be metaphorical. Then my concern would be that one risks diminishing a horrible thing, if one throws around that word as metaphor.)
This is a quick read, and, as I mentioned, it’s presented in a gripping fashion – if hyperbolicly so. I suspect that it will be mostly read by a demographic determined along political lines, which is a shame. It could have been so much more.
February 19, 2019
Half fiction, half real life situations, we follow the life of Sophia, a Salvadorian immigrant fleeing with her son after her husband’s violent death. It reads like an epic Greek tragedy, with Santiago Baca’s repetition showcasing the protagonist’s resilience in the face of constant gendered violence. “The stones and dirt witness,” Santiago Baca writes, forcing us to bear witness too, for who else will when a brown woman is constantly being put down and terrorized. “Lay on us, we will absorb your sadness,” the stones and dirt say, but rocks cannot absorb sadness, nor will they erase the pain that Sophia goes through. She transforms into a mountain, for what is a mountain but a giant rock, and she has to make herself into one if she is to survive. An unflinching look at what could and does await many people seeking asylum in the US, in spite of the vitriol of the white supremacist systems of power set in the government. Unforgettable and crucial in this moment in time.
TWs:
TWs:
December 13, 2018
As another reviewer noted, there are some over-the-top moments, but there is also a pure, lyrical core here.
(Read via digital galley provided by the publisher through Edelweiss)
(Read via digital galley provided by the publisher through Edelweiss)
October 27, 2025
Oh, man, Jimmy Santiago Baca, you've done it again. Your ink seeped into my skin, through my veins, filled my gut and lungs. Poetry, good poetry, does that. It is like drowning--submerged in the story and eventually clenched tight, hoping to pop up to sun and air and breath.
Jimmy, I read the back of the book first. About a month ago. And I cried for your friend. For you. For his family. I felt sick. And ashamed that my country does this to people. I love my country. And she is turning into something ugly and cruel. But it is us, Her people, who are dismantling all She stood for.
You say in the Author's Note: "Unless Democracy is in the heart, it doesn't matter much how many documents are signed or piled up in shelves...it won't work." The heart. Our collective hearts. What has happened to the heart of this beautiful country? Is it stone?
When I Walk Through that Door, I Am: an immigrant mother's quest, was published in 2019 and things have only gotten worse for immigrants. I will be discussing this novel in a book club and cannot wait--I feel I must talk about this.
I have a question for you, Jimmy: is the nameless narrator only known as "mi amor and Mama" to show she can be any immigrant woman? Is she all of us? I love her spirit and how you craft an "I Am" poem to show she is all the strong people who came before her ("Mother Teresa, Zapata, Cavez...).
Regarding writer's craft, this is soooo good. What I admire most is...
*The symbols in your novel, one being dirt and stone, offer me so much to think about.
*The repetition of walking. The way it builds suspense. And feels endless. But hopeful, too.
*The imagery. In one short page I knew who Tonal was--the details you use are specific and the allusions add layers. Speaking of allusions, those to writers (Baldwin), revolutionaries, and Saints paint pictures beyond the words for me. And the descriptions of nature. Yes! On pages 20-21 with the hawk's eyes. Such experiences can only be understood by people who see--really see--the web, the connection and Oneness of it all.
You have touched my heart with this book. And the ending! The open-endedness. The lack of conclusion. What did happen to all the disappeared children held in cages and taken from their moms during the ruthless round up? How many mothers of the disappeared will "continue to speak on [their] behalf, live on [their] behalf, and never give up searching for [them]?
Jimmy, I read the back of the book first. About a month ago. And I cried for your friend. For you. For his family. I felt sick. And ashamed that my country does this to people. I love my country. And she is turning into something ugly and cruel. But it is us, Her people, who are dismantling all She stood for.
You say in the Author's Note: "Unless Democracy is in the heart, it doesn't matter much how many documents are signed or piled up in shelves...it won't work." The heart. Our collective hearts. What has happened to the heart of this beautiful country? Is it stone?
When I Walk Through that Door, I Am: an immigrant mother's quest, was published in 2019 and things have only gotten worse for immigrants. I will be discussing this novel in a book club and cannot wait--I feel I must talk about this.
I have a question for you, Jimmy: is the nameless narrator only known as "mi amor and Mama" to show she can be any immigrant woman? Is she all of us? I love her spirit and how you craft an "I Am" poem to show she is all the strong people who came before her ("Mother Teresa, Zapata, Cavez...).
Regarding writer's craft, this is soooo good. What I admire most is...
*The symbols in your novel, one being dirt and stone, offer me so much to think about.
*The repetition of walking. The way it builds suspense. And feels endless. But hopeful, too.
*The imagery. In one short page I knew who Tonal was--the details you use are specific and the allusions add layers. Speaking of allusions, those to writers (Baldwin), revolutionaries, and Saints paint pictures beyond the words for me. And the descriptions of nature. Yes! On pages 20-21 with the hawk's eyes. Such experiences can only be understood by people who see--really see--the web, the connection and Oneness of it all.
You have touched my heart with this book. And the ending! The open-endedness. The lack of conclusion. What did happen to all the disappeared children held in cages and taken from their moms during the ruthless round up? How many mothers of the disappeared will "continue to speak on [their] behalf, live on [their] behalf, and never give up searching for [them]?
Read
August 11, 2024I guess I shouldn't be surprised that this book is so well-rated on goodreads. Liberals need an excuse to feel good about themselves and feel sorry for people they read about on the news. I am surprised at how much Jimmy Santiago Baca, one of my favorite poets, has changed from his truly honest political and empathetic self.
As Baca himself writes in his following book of poems, "No Enemies,"
Lament of a poet out of favor:
No more will I mock myself
with these shmoozefests--
that's the word that
comes to mind
when I see myself in online pics
cradling my trophies and checks,
no longer reviewing a books worth
by its contents
but by friendships and gender and ethnicity
politically correct or social networks,
not the poem's worth.
...
Mainstream America had me believe
if they string a few promises together
it makes up for the injustice
for the school-to-prison pipeline system,
for the trashing of our environment,
for illiteracy among people of color,
mainstream murmuring cliches in pho-ops
while Israelis kill Palestinian children,
and pet laureates in headbands
keep dismissing the truth that earth
is old and wrinkled and sunken-faced in her misery,
has become a sinkhole withdrawn from the light...
As I work with the people that Baca is writing aboout in this book, I find it difficult to accept how he uses the voice of a migrating Salvadoran woman to speak what are clearly his own political opinions. It was at times hard to even imagine that the speaker was anything other than the author. He also does not seem to have fully thought out any of these political opinions. He hates prison and ICE agents but thinks there should be better police and that the gangs should go to jail, he believes in some vague ideal of Democracy and that the US is a great country, but also that this country rapes and kills and excludes.
These are the contradictions of the mainstream US, and he puts this confusion into the mouth of a person he has no business speaking for. He rails against the political correctness and tokenism of today's poetry, while at the same time using his chicano heritage to justify writing a book in the voice of a person whose experience he cannot possibly understand. And of course the "schmoozefest" white audience he disdains just eats the shit up.
As Baca himself writes in his following book of poems, "No Enemies,"
Lament of a poet out of favor:
No more will I mock myself
with these shmoozefests--
that's the word that
comes to mind
when I see myself in online pics
cradling my trophies and checks,
no longer reviewing a books worth
by its contents
but by friendships and gender and ethnicity
politically correct or social networks,
not the poem's worth.
...
Mainstream America had me believe
if they string a few promises together
it makes up for the injustice
for the school-to-prison pipeline system,
for the trashing of our environment,
for illiteracy among people of color,
mainstream murmuring cliches in pho-ops
while Israelis kill Palestinian children,
and pet laureates in headbands
keep dismissing the truth that earth
is old and wrinkled and sunken-faced in her misery,
has become a sinkhole withdrawn from the light...
As I work with the people that Baca is writing aboout in this book, I find it difficult to accept how he uses the voice of a migrating Salvadoran woman to speak what are clearly his own political opinions. It was at times hard to even imagine that the speaker was anything other than the author. He also does not seem to have fully thought out any of these political opinions. He hates prison and ICE agents but thinks there should be better police and that the gangs should go to jail, he believes in some vague ideal of Democracy and that the US is a great country, but also that this country rapes and kills and excludes.
These are the contradictions of the mainstream US, and he puts this confusion into the mouth of a person he has no business speaking for. He rails against the political correctness and tokenism of today's poetry, while at the same time using his chicano heritage to justify writing a book in the voice of a person whose experience he cannot possibly understand. And of course the "schmoozefest" white audience he disdains just eats the shit up.
March 31, 2020
The poem written by Baca does a great job in creating the whole picture in front of your eyes, how an immigrant mother who lost his husband recently survives and spends the days in search of her kid. The woman talks about her journey, being raped and assaulted by different sets of poeple but still she has her eye on the upcoming peace. She has a hope that one day, everything will be alright. She doesn’t want her dreams to be ruined because of all the violence, she believes that no one can define her, but her. This piece of writing shows how a mother’s heart can never lose hope and will always stay strong, for she has to build a strong and successful child.
July 1, 2019
Lyrics for our times, from a master of the poetry of witness.
August 23, 2021
This is really good as a whole, but poetically it does falter in a few places as the rhythm often feels off. I appreciated the content though and think this is a good work overall.
December 17, 2024
This was utterly devastating.
September 11, 2022
“I am an immigrant mother on the quest for freedom.
There is no retreat.”
A powerful narrative of a woman’s journey to the states and the trials she must go through.
Heartbreaking and infuriating.
An epic poem that read very smoothly for me.
There is no retreat.”
A powerful narrative of a woman’s journey to the states and the trials she must go through.
Heartbreaking and infuriating.
An epic poem that read very smoothly for me.
June 6, 2019
Profound and beautiful.
August 4, 2022
4.5 stars. Narrative epic poem
Gorgeous writing (which is the reason the rating scooted to 5 stars).
Refrain:
And another:
Recommend: Definitely
*In my opinion, the only negative stems from the frequency of rape (seven, non-graphic). Four rapes (mentioned in passing) occur in El Salvador at the hands of bandits and police as Sophia and her four-year-old flee; the last three happen at the hands of ICE. Both the number and the lack of affect pulled me from her story. For what it's worth: The same critique can be found in a number of four-star ratings. Yet for me, Baca's writing overrides all else. 5 stars it remains.
**Baca himself sounds amazing. Now that I'm aware of his writing, I'll be on the lookout for it.
***Thank you to Joyce for sharing.
Gorgeous writing (which is the reason the rating scooted to 5 stars).
Refrain:
The stones and dirt witness
The stones ask
The stones take
The stones tell
Lay on us,
We will absorb your sadness.
And another:
I keep walking
carrying you in my thoughts
I feel I am walking up a mountain
...
Recommend: Definitely
*In my opinion, the only negative stems from the frequency of rape (seven, non-graphic). Four rapes (mentioned in passing) occur in El Salvador at the hands of bandits and police as Sophia and her four-year-old flee; the last three happen at the hands of ICE. Both the number and the lack of affect pulled me from her story. For what it's worth: The same critique can be found in a number of four-star ratings. Yet for me, Baca's writing overrides all else. 5 stars it remains.
**Baca himself sounds amazing. Now that I'm aware of his writing, I'll be on the lookout for it.
***Thank you to Joyce for sharing.
January 16, 2024
Gutting. The older I get, the more disenchanted I am with this country I get to call home. How can we sit on our pedestal and judge everyone that is below us? I can't stand it. This book ripped a hole into my already broken heart. People deserve better than what America has to give.
June 15, 2019
This narrative is so rich and hopeful despite the pain and horror experienced by the speaker. Everyone deserves to have their voice heard.
May 16, 2019
This is a wonderful narrative poem about an immigrant's experience. It is both beautiful and heartbreaking. It reminds me of another poetry collection called The Language of Crossing by Liza Wolff Frances. If you are interested in the immigrant experience, I recommend checking out both.
July 15, 2024
This poem was certainly very effective emotionally. After reading it I was overcome with a feeling of grief and hopelessness about the treatment of refugees, asylees, and all manner of immigrants in this country. The poem is (I think) well written. (Although for what it's worth, I often struggle to understand poetry. I don't often find the form adds to my experience of reading.) There are several images and motifs the poet returns to which made this easier to grasp onto. I was also able to read it in one sitting which made it more impactful.
The narrator is certainly very strong and resilient through all her hardships. However, after reading the poem I felt very hopeless and despondent about the violence built into our political systems like immigration and prisons. I read the author's note at the end about his experience working with an immigrant who was eventually detained by ICE and how he wanted to write to humanize people. However, I couldn't help but think what was the real world implication of reading a book like this or any book. The audience for poetry I would wager skews left, and the intended audience is probably already sees ICE detention centers as cruel and inhuman. While I think work like this is important, the terminus cannot just be liberals and leftists reading things like this and thinking "that's horrible. We should be treating asylum seekers more humanely," and then nothing comes of it.
My thoughts here are messy, but as you can see there is a lot to digest with this work.
The narrator is certainly very strong and resilient through all her hardships. However, after reading the poem I felt very hopeless and despondent about the violence built into our political systems like immigration and prisons. I read the author's note at the end about his experience working with an immigrant who was eventually detained by ICE and how he wanted to write to humanize people. However, I couldn't help but think what was the real world implication of reading a book like this or any book. The audience for poetry I would wager skews left, and the intended audience is probably already sees ICE detention centers as cruel and inhuman. While I think work like this is important, the terminus cannot just be liberals and leftists reading things like this and thinking "that's horrible. We should be treating asylum seekers more humanely," and then nothing comes of it.
My thoughts here are messy, but as you can see there is a lot to digest with this work.
February 29, 2020
We follow an immigrant mother (like the title literally already says) from the moment her husband is shot to the time she finally gets something like freedom. There’s one major thing that needs to be said about this: it’s really difficult to read. The sentences are just…….. so long. The formatting was also quite weird. But if you get over that, it is a really good read.
It is very relevant, and recalls some moments that most of us will probably remember (i.e., the president visiting a detainment center) but only this time, from the perspective of an immigrant who is being held in this exact place. The narrative is fascinating in a rare way. The repetition of the stone motif just goes on to drive home the fact that it’s a cold world. But despite this, the protagonist remains hopeful, tries to stay kind and is still looking for her son.
The author’s note has some similar themes to the rest of the novel and definitely read-worthy as it is pretty much a whole novel in itself.
Tl;dr: The idea of shining a light on these unimaginable horrors which are happening all the time is very necessary right now, and it did its job of making people notice. If you just want to be more informed or are trying to read more political pieces, this is perfect. But if you actually wish for a book that shows you a concrete course of action you can take, keep looking.
It is very relevant, and recalls some moments that most of us will probably remember (i.e., the president visiting a detainment center) but only this time, from the perspective of an immigrant who is being held in this exact place. The narrative is fascinating in a rare way. The repetition of the stone motif just goes on to drive home the fact that it’s a cold world. But despite this, the protagonist remains hopeful, tries to stay kind and is still looking for her son.
The author’s note has some similar themes to the rest of the novel and definitely read-worthy as it is pretty much a whole novel in itself.
Tl;dr: The idea of shining a light on these unimaginable horrors which are happening all the time is very necessary right now, and it did its job of making people notice. If you just want to be more informed or are trying to read more political pieces, this is perfect. But if you actually wish for a book that shows you a concrete course of action you can take, keep looking.
December 19, 2019
*I received a free copy of this book from the publisher through LibraryThing’s Early Reviewers in exchange for an honest review.*
TW: violence, death, rape,
This is a heart-wrenching epic poem of a mother who finds herself desperate to find a safe place for her child, so risks crossing the border to the US to keep her son from being killed by gangs. It’s a raw, honest look at the conditions people have to go through in the current situation to escape a life and death situation.
Baca’s imagery is powerful and his message is clear: these people need compassion, not detention camps. I was heartbroken at the story because while it’s a work of fiction, it’s all too real. I can’t say that this is something that everyone should read, because it has content that is tough to deal with, but it’s a beautifully written, relevant story that made me feel so much empathy for what immigrants are facing right now.
Also posted on Purple People Readers.
TW: violence, death, rape,
This is a heart-wrenching epic poem of a mother who finds herself desperate to find a safe place for her child, so risks crossing the border to the US to keep her son from being killed by gangs. It’s a raw, honest look at the conditions people have to go through in the current situation to escape a life and death situation.
Baca’s imagery is powerful and his message is clear: these people need compassion, not detention camps. I was heartbroken at the story because while it’s a work of fiction, it’s all too real. I can’t say that this is something that everyone should read, because it has content that is tough to deal with, but it’s a beautifully written, relevant story that made me feel so much empathy for what immigrants are facing right now.
Also posted on Purple People Readers.
March 8, 2019
Haunting, powerful poetry that will make you angry and hopeful in equal measure. This timely long-form poem should be required reading for all those in American politics, news or commentary.
TRIGGER WARNING: graphic depictions of rape, murder, suicide, and child seperation.
* Copy recieved via publisher *
TRIGGER WARNING: graphic depictions of rape, murder, suicide, and child seperation.
* Copy recieved via publisher *
December 30, 2019
This slim volume of gorgeous lyric poetry brings to life a young immigrant woman whose husband is murdered in San Salvador and her three-year-old son is separated from her by the Trump regime. This should be required reading for everyone writing immigration policy. Read it now.
April 1, 2019
Poignant poetic epic story of a mother seeking safety after the murder of her husband but finding pain and loss after being held in detention and having her son ripped from her.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
July 23, 2020
It is obvious as you are reading the story that he hasn't lived through this experience. It feels ingenuine.
January 19, 2024
I picked this up at random assuming it was nonfiction/the voice of someone speaking from their life.
Yeah... no. And it deeply shows. It really saddens me how obviously inauthentic it felt.
Yeah... no. And it deeply shows. It really saddens me how obviously inauthentic it felt.
December 28, 2022
This story in verse, written in the first person PoV of Sophie, an immigrant mother, treated with brutality and callousness at every step of the way, is a powerful one. It builds a picture of a struggling family, helpless against circumstances beyond their control, reeling at the mercy of a shattered social order.
When Tonal, Sophie’s husband, is shot at outside their home in San Salvador because he wouldn’t pay off the gangs extorting half the paycheques of workers, she escapes with her 4-year-old son Joaquin strapped to her back to escape the wrath of the gangs.
But more hell awaits them. At every port and border they are met with hostility. There is no way ahead, and none behind. They are stripped of their humanity, seen only as carriers of disease, and as outlaws and criminals.
Through her harrowing ordeal, Sophie is gang-raped more than 4 times. She bears her oppression with none but the stones and dirt to bear witness. Only cacti and hundred-year-old cedars root in desert granite crevices counsel me in patience.
And after all that she is separated from her son at the US border.
As Sophie describes her struggle to build a life for herself and her son, her ordeal reminds us that Democracy’s body/ on the barbwire,/ a mangled prisoner/ trying to escape its torturers.
She hopes that America will open the door,/ invite us to your table/ welcome and respect/ and help and appreciate us,/ because that is what we did/…we warmed you at our fires,/ bedded you in warm blankets/ healed you, cured you/ cared for your children --/ open your hearts/ as we did ours.
The book is a hard-hitting accusation that convicts all those of us whose reaction is apathy, those of us who assuage their guilt with teddy bears and roses.
When I Walk Through That Door, I Am refers to the freedom she experiences when she is allowed to leave the detention centre. Her hope shines through as she looks forward to a reunion with her son. The book ends with Sophie promising to speak on your behalf, live on your behalf, and never give up searching for you.
The poem is not the only testimony this book bears within its pages. Through his personal experience with Sae Po, a refugee from Myanmar, the author reminds us that refugees make so much out of so little. The author not only gave Sae Po a job, and helped him to work towards building for himself a life in America, he also wrote the story of refugees around the world. I act, I engage, and I write.
When Tonal, Sophie’s husband, is shot at outside their home in San Salvador because he wouldn’t pay off the gangs extorting half the paycheques of workers, she escapes with her 4-year-old son Joaquin strapped to her back to escape the wrath of the gangs.
But more hell awaits them. At every port and border they are met with hostility. There is no way ahead, and none behind. They are stripped of their humanity, seen only as carriers of disease, and as outlaws and criminals.
Through her harrowing ordeal, Sophie is gang-raped more than 4 times. She bears her oppression with none but the stones and dirt to bear witness. Only cacti and hundred-year-old cedars root in desert granite crevices counsel me in patience.
And after all that she is separated from her son at the US border.
As Sophie describes her struggle to build a life for herself and her son, her ordeal reminds us that Democracy’s body/ on the barbwire,/ a mangled prisoner/ trying to escape its torturers.
She hopes that America will open the door,/ invite us to your table/ welcome and respect/ and help and appreciate us,/ because that is what we did/…we warmed you at our fires,/ bedded you in warm blankets/ healed you, cured you/ cared for your children --/ open your hearts/ as we did ours.
The book is a hard-hitting accusation that convicts all those of us whose reaction is apathy, those of us who assuage their guilt with teddy bears and roses.
When I Walk Through That Door, I Am refers to the freedom she experiences when she is allowed to leave the detention centre. Her hope shines through as she looks forward to a reunion with her son. The book ends with Sophie promising to speak on your behalf, live on your behalf, and never give up searching for you.
The poem is not the only testimony this book bears within its pages. Through his personal experience with Sae Po, a refugee from Myanmar, the author reminds us that refugees make so much out of so little. The author not only gave Sae Po a job, and helped him to work towards building for himself a life in America, he also wrote the story of refugees around the world. I act, I engage, and I write.
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