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Not for Nothing: Glimpses into a Jersey Girlhood
"And there was one more question posed to me, over and over again, mostly by my big-hearted, bull-headed, capa tosta of a father. It typically flew my way when the cyclone of rage and love and fear and affection ripped through the walls, shaking the everyday worlds . . . Who do you think you are?"
- GenresMemoir
184 pages, Paperback
Published December 11, 2018
68 people want to read
About the author
Kathy Curto
11 books10 followersKathy Curto teaches at The Writing Institute and Montclair State University. She is the author of Not for Nothing-Glimpses into a Jersey Girlhood, published by Bordighera Press. Her work has been featured several times on NPR, in the essay collection, Listen to Your Mother: What She Said Then, What We’re Saying Now, and in The New York Times, Barrelhouse, La Voce di New York, Drift, Talking Writing, Junk, The Inquisitive Eater, The Asbury Park Press, VIA-Voices in Italian Americana, Ovunque Siamo and Lumina. She has been the recipient of the Kathryn Gurfein Writing Fellowship, the Montclair State University Engaged Teaching Fellowship and also serves on the faculty of the Joe Papaleo Writers’ Workshop in Cetara, Italy. Kathy lives in the Hudson Valley with her husband and their four children.
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Displaying 1 - 17 of 17 reviews
January 2, 2019
Kathy Curto gives readers a glimpse into her New Jersey childhood from the 1970s. ”Not For Nothing” is a collection of memories as viewed from the youngest daughter in an Italian - American family. Kathy’s father owned a gas station while her mother tended the house while watching over her children. Her parent’s relationship was volatile and was fueled by the stress related to her brother’s drug use.
”Not For Nothing” is a memoir that consists of short humorous vignettes that reflect slices of the author’s life experiences. Items and places mentioned in the book were very relatable to my own childhood. I chuckled at the mention of the Ground Round restaurant where peanut shells could be thrown on the floor, and eating Quisp cereal for breakfast.
This is an enjoyable debut novel.
”Not For Nothing” is a memoir that consists of short humorous vignettes that reflect slices of the author’s life experiences. Items and places mentioned in the book were very relatable to my own childhood. I chuckled at the mention of the Ground Round restaurant where peanut shells could be thrown on the floor, and eating Quisp cereal for breakfast.
This is an enjoyable debut novel.
January 19, 2019
Kathy Curto , Author of “Not for Nothing ” Glimpses Into a Jersey Girlhood” has written am emotional , descriptive and intense memoir of her growing up in New Jersey. This is a coming of age story. In this Memoir, Kathy Curto has written mini stories of her recollections of life in New Jersey. I appreciate the honesty, compassion and the vivid heart-breaking details that are mentioned in many of the stories. The timeline for these stories are mostly in the nineteen seventies.
These are stories of family, friends, rage, love, and hope. The author writes about life as she sees in her father’s garage business. Often her mother sends her out to get cold sodas for the customers waiting for their cars. She remembers dancing for the customers in the garage. Music and songs playing on the radio are often mentioned. The author lovingly describes her mother’s cooking. Kathy also mentions that fits of rage, and platters flying and dishes crashing, when her father was angry. Often her father or mother would use the term “Who do you think you are? Finally having enough, Kathy’s Mother takes her siblings and moves out and starts working independently.
Somehow her parents reconcile, and buy a second house closer to the beach where Kathy has some nice memories and some good friends. In this coming of age book, the author discusses young adults and drugs. Often it is too close to home. I would recommend this well written Memoir for this readers who enjoy coming of age stories in this time frame.
These are stories of family, friends, rage, love, and hope. The author writes about life as she sees in her father’s garage business. Often her mother sends her out to get cold sodas for the customers waiting for their cars. She remembers dancing for the customers in the garage. Music and songs playing on the radio are often mentioned. The author lovingly describes her mother’s cooking. Kathy also mentions that fits of rage, and platters flying and dishes crashing, when her father was angry. Often her father or mother would use the term “Who do you think you are? Finally having enough, Kathy’s Mother takes her siblings and moves out and starts working independently.
Somehow her parents reconcile, and buy a second house closer to the beach where Kathy has some nice memories and some good friends. In this coming of age book, the author discusses young adults and drugs. Often it is too close to home. I would recommend this well written Memoir for this readers who enjoy coming of age stories in this time frame.
March 11, 2019
Curto’s precision of language and skillful attention to the telling detail drives her compelling narrative. By turns gripping, gritty, tender and funny, this coming of age memoir is a gem. Don’t miss it.
June 27, 2019
In this engaging memoir Kathy Curto took me on a journey into a childhood not unlike my own. Written with the child's voice and the mature woman's skill this book is a must read.
February 13, 2019
This is a memoir about growing up in New Jersey in an on again, off again family. Curto tells the story through the eyes of a child, and we as readers get to fill in the gaps about what's happening. It calls to mind The Boy in the Striped Pajamas in this way. I don't know how she is able to call up so many specifics about the hair and the food and the decor of the time. But I found myself right there, sitting in the lap of her childhood and rooting for her all the way. Loved it.
July 29, 2020
If you grew up in New Jersey in the latter half of the 20th century you may well have had a father who used the expression “not for nothing.” Kathy Curto’s father did. Usually as a preface to obsessing over some perceived behavioral atrocity on the part of his family or the folks around him. This is a family where dad finishes off his meal by unbuttoning his pants and burping loudly. Where mom ends a rare visit to a hotel by packing the towels and ashtrays into her bag.
Not for Nothing is a tale of coming of age in an Italian-American working class family. Mostly it’s about the toxicity of that family. And most of the toxicity comes from the father, who Curto describes as follows: “My father is a son of a bitch bastard. That’s what my mother calls him sometimes and I agree although I might add fascist, bastard and dickhead to the list.” Like so many working class fathers at the time he is a walking tinderbox whose family tip-toes around in an effort to keep from setting him off. A drug-addicted older brother adds another dimension to the overall tension and dysfunction.
Curto's story is told in a series of short vignettes. Not a comprehensive memoir by any means but rather a collection of episodes that capture the time and place. Told from the perspective of a young girl who can never quite distance herself as much as she claims to want to.
Growing up in New Jersey has become almost a genre. When I lived in Jersey City I laughed my way through “Five-Finger Discount” about family life there. I read “Paterson Boy” about the town I was born in. Curto grew up in Toms River. I never lived there but it is right next to Seaside Heights where my family owned a vacation home. I expected familiarity and humor. I got familiarity. We both ate in the Toms River Diner.
Not for Nothing is a tale of coming of age in an Italian-American working class family. Mostly it’s about the toxicity of that family. And most of the toxicity comes from the father, who Curto describes as follows: “My father is a son of a bitch bastard. That’s what my mother calls him sometimes and I agree although I might add fascist, bastard and dickhead to the list.” Like so many working class fathers at the time he is a walking tinderbox whose family tip-toes around in an effort to keep from setting him off. A drug-addicted older brother adds another dimension to the overall tension and dysfunction.
Curto's story is told in a series of short vignettes. Not a comprehensive memoir by any means but rather a collection of episodes that capture the time and place. Told from the perspective of a young girl who can never quite distance herself as much as she claims to want to.
Growing up in New Jersey has become almost a genre. When I lived in Jersey City I laughed my way through “Five-Finger Discount” about family life there. I read “Paterson Boy” about the town I was born in. Curto grew up in Toms River. I never lived there but it is right next to Seaside Heights where my family owned a vacation home. I expected familiarity and humor. I got familiarity. We both ate in the Toms River Diner.
January 5, 2019
Not for Nothing is a coming of age memoir in mini-stories packed with gritty and unique details and huge amounts of feeling told by the youngest daughter of an Italian-American family in southern Jersey in the 70s. Kathy’s father owns a gas station, her mother is a homemaker, her brother is getting high. Not all is well with the world.
“I was the last to know everything, yet I somehow made it my job to clean the everything up.” Little Kathy is always noticing and trying to make sense of the chaos and the fun and the worry. “The next thing I knew, we were at this restaurant called ‘The Causeway’ and I was drinking Shirley Temples and eating shrimp marinara.” “If they came for Pop,” her dad might say, “then we need to go. Not for nothing, but it’s only right.” This becomes an introduction to a poignant and funny account about wakes, where the kids play with the prayer cards they collect. Kathy’s voice is serious and deadpan hilarious as she recounts painful (and comical) events in the life of the family. It’s the beautiful voice of a child speaking truth.
I started the book just before the end of the year and it’s the first book I can say I finished in 2019. Deeply affecting. Truth about “the ferocity of love and forgiveness.” Truth about the early sexual awakening of a young girl. Truth about our need for family and a child’s need to hold it whole and to fix it. This is a memoir on the highest level.
“I was the last to know everything, yet I somehow made it my job to clean the everything up.” Little Kathy is always noticing and trying to make sense of the chaos and the fun and the worry. “The next thing I knew, we were at this restaurant called ‘The Causeway’ and I was drinking Shirley Temples and eating shrimp marinara.” “If they came for Pop,” her dad might say, “then we need to go. Not for nothing, but it’s only right.” This becomes an introduction to a poignant and funny account about wakes, where the kids play with the prayer cards they collect. Kathy’s voice is serious and deadpan hilarious as she recounts painful (and comical) events in the life of the family. It’s the beautiful voice of a child speaking truth.
I started the book just before the end of the year and it’s the first book I can say I finished in 2019. Deeply affecting. Truth about “the ferocity of love and forgiveness.” Truth about the early sexual awakening of a young girl. Truth about our need for family and a child’s need to hold it whole and to fix it. This is a memoir on the highest level.
January 9, 2023
Not for Nothing: Glimpses into a Jersey Girlhood is a quick but meaningful read many of us can relate to.
Curto has an eye and an ear for detail. She spools out individual yet connected scenes the from her experiences as the youngest of four in an Italian-American household of the 70’s and 80’s. We are seeing through the lens of a child who is simultaneously perceptive and naive - a balanced perspective not easy to achieve as a memoirist.
I love the act of deciphering in this book: there are things young Curto knows (and can anticipate about her parents and siblings) and other things she doesn’t. She’s trying to figure it all out. Her story confirms and reflects back what we all eventually come to understand...that people and families are imperfect and people we love can hurt and also hurt us. There are moments in these pages that are tender and others that are harsh. Throughout it all, Curto uses all senses and the result is a vivid tale of home at a particular time, in a specific place, completely different from our own upbringings and in some ways exactly the same.
Curto has an eye and an ear for detail. She spools out individual yet connected scenes the from her experiences as the youngest of four in an Italian-American household of the 70’s and 80’s. We are seeing through the lens of a child who is simultaneously perceptive and naive - a balanced perspective not easy to achieve as a memoirist.
I love the act of deciphering in this book: there are things young Curto knows (and can anticipate about her parents and siblings) and other things she doesn’t. She’s trying to figure it all out. Her story confirms and reflects back what we all eventually come to understand...that people and families are imperfect and people we love can hurt and also hurt us. There are moments in these pages that are tender and others that are harsh. Throughout it all, Curto uses all senses and the result is a vivid tale of home at a particular time, in a specific place, completely different from our own upbringings and in some ways exactly the same.
October 28, 2019
Kathy Curto’s Not for Nothing, Glimpses into a Jersey Girlhood, is such a satisfying and well- rendered read about growing up female in the 70s and 80s. Except for the prologue and epilogue, Kathy narrates the entire story in the present tense and from the perspective of her younger self. The result is an evocative and poignant tapestry that weaves together the weight of her parents’ tumultuous marriage and her brother’s addiction together with the lighter, joyful moments of being a kid, an Italian-American girl growing up on the Jersey Shore. Her child voice beautifully reflects both youthful confusion and astuteness. Although deeply personal, Kathy’s story is so jam packed with the world and all its palpable sensuality--the songs, the smells, the tastes, the dress, the culture—that you are right there with her regardless of where, when, or how you grew up. A thoroughly moving debut memoir that I will enjoy reading over and over.
February 8, 2023
“Jersey girlhood” is perhaps the best phrase Curto could have utilized for this book. As a child of the Jersey Shore myself, I definitely felt the passion for family, childhood, and the Garden State that Curto emulates in her writing and throughout each tale of her youth.
Curto’s writing style is succinct and descriptive in all the best ways. Little stories that seem to start off about nothing in particular end a page later as something that hits you right in the chest. Curto’s utilization of motif is a key factor in that, and little lines or phrases that are mentioned on page 1 come back to haunt Curto and the reader on page 70.
Though there were definitely moments where I felt a little jarred with the pacing (the jump from young childhood to being a young adult was a little surprising), Curto’s novel is a beautiful collection of memories wrapped up in a memoir. I can’t recommend enough to anyone looking to get into the genre, and especially to any child of the Garden State
Curto’s writing style is succinct and descriptive in all the best ways. Little stories that seem to start off about nothing in particular end a page later as something that hits you right in the chest. Curto’s utilization of motif is a key factor in that, and little lines or phrases that are mentioned on page 1 come back to haunt Curto and the reader on page 70.
Though there were definitely moments where I felt a little jarred with the pacing (the jump from young childhood to being a young adult was a little surprising), Curto’s novel is a beautiful collection of memories wrapped up in a memoir. I can’t recommend enough to anyone looking to get into the genre, and especially to any child of the Garden State
September 9, 2021
I want to boost and give a major shout out to Kathy Curto. Her book, “Not For Nothing” is a quick and really rich read of the memoir flavor. Buy it on Amazon or through her press, Bordighera Press. She writes about her childhood in NJ as an Italian-American, and it’s never quite what you’d expect. Which always means a winner for me. As a reader, I love to be jolted and taken by surprise by the author’s truths. No holding back, or I will put the book down. I couldn’t put this book down. There are uncomfortable truths and lovely sketches of what it’s like. It’s an important read so pull up your coffee, tea, and dig into Kathy’s pages that burst with humanity and setting. Also- so many textural surprises.
January 10, 2019
I'm not Italian, and not from Jersey, but still devoured this little memoir filled with big fat juicy essays about growing up in a family filled with conflict and compassion. Curto's memories are American memories, and you'll be fed with her delicious stories of music and wonder, always teetering on the dangerous edge of not fully understanding what's happening in the world around her, while trying her best to grow up in spite of it. And because of it. Read slowly cuz you'll be sad when it's over.
December 7, 2019
This short memoir of the author's growing-up years in New Jersey is remarkable. Curto has an ear for language -- those expressions used by your parents, your siblings, your neighbors, your childhood loves -- that frame the way you see the world forever. There is pain here and turmoil, but the love triumphs.
February 6, 2020
A finely observed, quietly understated, poignant account in short impressionistic chapters of a sensitive girl growing up in a volatile, blue-collar Italian-American family. Exquisitely rendered; compelling; saturated in pain and love. Masterful.
January 25, 2019
Loved it. Wonderful, funny, heart wrenching, honest memoir.
June 27, 2019
Superb!
February 15, 2023
4.5 stars
i read this for class and bro. this one was so crazy because so many little pieces of my childhood are represented. u all should probs read this if u are from NJ and/or Italian
i read this for class and bro. this one was so crazy because so many little pieces of my childhood are represented. u all should probs read this if u are from NJ and/or Italian
Displaying 1 - 17 of 17 reviews