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Dragons Suck
Harkness is absolutely not a hero—but unfortunately for him, he’s been volunteered by his village to save the world, and he quickly finds that modern-day sarcasm is no match for ancient dragons.
Harkness, a medieval peasant with a millennial’s mindset, is quite happy to sit back and make quips while everyone else does the hard work. His calculated laziness is interrupted when the gods send an ancient and terrible scourge-by-dragonfire upon his village, and he is forced (peer-pressured, really) into trying to save his fiancée from the dragon who has kidnapped her.
When Harkness is sent by the village elder to find the one weapon that is capable of killing the beast, his real plan is to go off on his own and use his village’s money to live the high life. This, of course, would require ditching his two Karla, an aspiring troubadour whose passion makes up for her lack of adventuring skills, and Aldric, whose kindheartedness does not make up for his lack of intelligence. Harkness sees this journey as a paid vacation under the pretense of world-saving, but it quickly turns serious when he realizes what’s at stake when he is forced to actually care about something—or at the very least, pretend to.
Harkness, a medieval peasant with a millennial’s mindset, is quite happy to sit back and make quips while everyone else does the hard work. His calculated laziness is interrupted when the gods send an ancient and terrible scourge-by-dragonfire upon his village, and he is forced (peer-pressured, really) into trying to save his fiancée from the dragon who has kidnapped her.
When Harkness is sent by the village elder to find the one weapon that is capable of killing the beast, his real plan is to go off on his own and use his village’s money to live the high life. This, of course, would require ditching his two Karla, an aspiring troubadour whose passion makes up for her lack of adventuring skills, and Aldric, whose kindheartedness does not make up for his lack of intelligence. Harkness sees this journey as a paid vacation under the pretense of world-saving, but it quickly turns serious when he realizes what’s at stake when he is forced to actually care about something—or at the very least, pretend to.
- GenresFantasy
272 pages, Paperback
Published May 14, 2019
5 people are currently reading
55 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews
March 15, 2020
An impressive first offering to the literary world from Mr. Gamble. This novel captures the sardonic wit of teenagers that few writers can, all within an interesting premise and a story full of twists and turns. I am excited to see what he comes up with next!
March 16, 2020
I truly enjoyed this book! Unique, clever, and hysterical! I enjoyed every page!
March 16, 2020
Living in a world where up is down and society feels like it’s crumbling sometimes, this book was a witty and sarcastic delight. Not only is it a nice escape into a deep and detailed fantasy world, but it also manages to flip the typical script of the epic hero on its head, keeping me hooked to the end. I definitely got a few weird looks on the subway when I cackled aloud. Great book, would gladly pick it up again.
March 15, 2020
This book is a hoot. The writer captures satire, wit, and has excellent character development. As a former English teacher, I spot talent. This young writer has it in spades. Wonderful book and I hope to see more from Mr. Gamble.
March 16, 2020
Heartwarming and hilarious, Dragons Suck will have readers cheering for Harkness and his ragtag band of friends. Great book for young and old readers alike. A funny adventure story that has just the right amount of sweetness. Loved it!
March 16, 2020
This is a great, succinct read. Harkness, our main character, has a dry comical wit that kept me laughing as I turned the pages. This is married with a solid line of fantasy that makes for a great crossover genre book.
March 16, 2020
Loved the humor and snark of Harkness. A fun story with a lot of heart. Hope to see more from Mr. Gamble!
March 16, 2020
Most amazing book I have read in 2019. Highly recommend this book for anyone who loves adventure, comedy, and of course dragons. Go buy this book!
March 16, 2020
Ben Gamble displays his mastery of sardonic wit through Harkness, a fun and original take on the reluctant hero, as he embarks on his mediaeval odyssey. While the book is indeed humorous, it never really detracts from the gravity of some of the more perilous and serious parts of the adventure, such the harrowing encounter with the Hollowthroat. Though the book has an entertaining and well laid out plot, the real profundity of the narrative comes from the refreshingly poignant use of the power of friendship and love as a means of combating adversity; Karla and Aldric exemplify the virtues of friendship and self sacrifice and fierce loyalty throughout their tribulations as they stand by Harkness despite his protest and perhaps feigned stoicism towards the notion of close emotional connection, culminating in a beautiful arc where Harkness matures and learns the value of being true to his emotions, and understanding the nature of destiny as it pertains to what we choose to do. Elaine serves as a brilliant foil to Harkness, who embarks on the very same quest not for superficial reasons like fame, or simply because it's expected of her, but because pure love compels her to act and face seemingly insurmountable danger. Ultimately this piece offers themes of not just our fragile mortality and the turbulent nature of life, but it proposes that destiny, that of ourselves and those around us, is shaped by our actions and choices, and to that end Harkness teaches us that a path leading to peace and happiness can only be brought about with emotional honesty and a firm grasp on what we value.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
March 18, 2020
Such a FUN read! I was honestly tired of ultra-dramatic and somber fantasy novels- this book was a refreshing take on a heroic story. It had me laughing out loud on the train. I'd highly recommend Dragons Suck to anyone looking to spruce up their fantasy collection.
March 16, 2020
Loved this book! Enjoyed the author’s entertaining approach to a millennial tackling such a great task. Looking forward to reading more by Benjamin Gamble.
March 16, 2020
I read the book after buying a signed copy in Greenville,SC.
Loved the humor and all the twists. The end is the ultimate twist. Dragons Suck is a five star.
Waiting on the sequel!
Loved the humor and all the twists. The end is the ultimate twist. Dragons Suck is a five star.
Waiting on the sequel!
March 20, 2020
The level of storytelling and ridiculous characters Gamble writes makes this possibly the most engaging book I have EVER read! Gamble keeps it hilarious, witty, brilliant, and wonderful. Hope for another soon!
December 23, 2019
Dragons are not the only thing that suck as this whole book turned out to be a bit of a dud! OK, that was an exaggeration but this book was definitely a bit of a flop and that was such a shame really as the premise of the story was a really fun one.
This was a comedic fantasy story. We followed the adventures of Harkness, an anachronistic medieval peasant, as he got forced into a quest/journey to save a girlfriend he could not care less about from the clutches of a dragon that just destroyed his entire village.
I felt like this actually started quite well. Harkness was a bit of a wastrel so a lot of his early musings were pretty funny. The guy was a complete ass even in the wake of his whole village getting destroyed! I also enjoyed how he got guilt tripped into going on the quest to save his girlfriend from the dragons clutches and how his planned to just start a new life elsewhere got derailed as soon as he got a few companions added to his quest team. All of that made for a promising start as while Harkness was an ass there were hints that he might be able to grow positively as a character as the story progressed. The issue was that as soon as the quest got going the story took a turn for the worst. Nothing offensive happened but it was just so dull that I totally lost interest and the longer it went the more boring things became up to the point when I just did not care to continue.
I hit the DNF at about the 80% mark. I could not even rustle up the enthusiasm to finish the last few hours of the audio! It was a real shame as I'm a fan of a bit of comedy mixed in with my fantasy and we got that here. This was a fairly short book (around 9 hours in audio) but I still think it might have worked better had it just been a 3 to 4 hour length novella.
Rating: 2.5 stars. No higher since I failed to make it to the end.
Audio Note: Rudy Sanda did a decent job with the audio.
This was a comedic fantasy story. We followed the adventures of Harkness, an anachronistic medieval peasant, as he got forced into a quest/journey to save a girlfriend he could not care less about from the clutches of a dragon that just destroyed his entire village.
I felt like this actually started quite well. Harkness was a bit of a wastrel so a lot of his early musings were pretty funny. The guy was a complete ass even in the wake of his whole village getting destroyed! I also enjoyed how he got guilt tripped into going on the quest to save his girlfriend from the dragons clutches and how his planned to just start a new life elsewhere got derailed as soon as he got a few companions added to his quest team. All of that made for a promising start as while Harkness was an ass there were hints that he might be able to grow positively as a character as the story progressed. The issue was that as soon as the quest got going the story took a turn for the worst. Nothing offensive happened but it was just so dull that I totally lost interest and the longer it went the more boring things became up to the point when I just did not care to continue.
I hit the DNF at about the 80% mark. I could not even rustle up the enthusiasm to finish the last few hours of the audio! It was a real shame as I'm a fan of a bit of comedy mixed in with my fantasy and we got that here. This was a fairly short book (around 9 hours in audio) but I still think it might have worked better had it just been a 3 to 4 hour length novella.
Rating: 2.5 stars. No higher since I failed to make it to the end.
Audio Note: Rudy Sanda did a decent job with the audio.
March 17, 2020
Like tales filled with magical creatures but wish there were better jokes about syphilis? You're in luck. It's about time the classic dragon vanquishing quest got a remix with comedy. Dragons Suck is a very fun read.
March 25, 2020
With “Dragon’s Suck,” Ben Gamble satirizes the fantasy genre in a way that’s readily accessible to all readers, regardless of their background with fantasy literature. In comedy fiction, especially parodies/satire, it can be all too easy to rely on cheap humor to carry characters through the plot. However, with “Dragon’s Suck,” Gamble never takes the easy way out, instead creating a story that is incredibly funny yet also heartfelt and meaningful. On top of this, the book can be enjoyed by both teens and adults, and each group will find something unique to appreciate. I can understand how some negative reviewers on here can be off-put, because this isn’t your typical fantasy or comedy. It’s my opinion, however, that it walks the fine line of delivering the best of both worlds. Insightful readers looking for a laugh and gripping story will find much to enjoy.
July 8, 2020
Surprising and engaging. A gripping story with humor and heart that keeps you wanting more after each chapter.
August 16, 2020
What a twist on the typical fantasy story! Every page of the book keeps you invested, and I was so disappointed when it ended! I’m hoping for a sequel soon!
June 16, 2021
Love this book! It's a refreshing take on fantasy with a unique voice. I read it all in one sitting because I just didn't want to put it down. Benjamin Gamble's writing is sarcastic, funny, and all together a great read!
February 17, 2022
An amusing and imaginative take on a classic genre! Benjamin Gamble offers readers the rare opportunity to experience a richly crafted world of fantasy through a new, modern lens. Dragons Suck relates the epic quest of the world's most unlikely hero with brilliant flares of charming wit and contemporary comedy. I am hoping to see more from this author soon!
February 17, 2022
I had a substantial portion of this story read to me while I fished. This may be one of the greatest pieces of fiction I've ever had the pleasure to not read. Laughed out loud more times than my education allows me to quantify.
February 17, 2022
I absolutely loved this book! It made me think about my own life and how you can be an ordinary person yet very heroic. I am a hero and so are you. 10/10 I would recommend this book to anyone and everyone!
October 13, 2020
I have very mixed opinions about this book. Some parts felt like an original, heartwarming story while some felt like it was trying to be a knock-off Percy Jackson. It definitely wasn't a bad book though. If a teenager is having difficulty finding a book they enjoy, it's worth a shot, but if it's someone who's an experienced reader (especially in fantasy) it might be better to skip.
October 5, 2019
No, this sucked. Senseless.
February 18, 2022
Loved this book when it first came out, and love it more with every re-read! Can't wait to see what Gamble will do next.
June 21, 2025
I actually enjoyed this book very much. I was hooked by the cover and title at my library. There were moments I actually laughed out loud. The narrator and main character is Harkness who is forced into a quest that he doesn’t have much enthusiasm for by peer pressure from people in his village which has just been destroyed by a dragon. This was a first novel by Benjamin Gamble.
I like the story. Harkness goes through a lot of terrible ordeals in his quest. The character is funny and sarcastic, cynical, a smart ass. I did have some problems with details about him. For instance he speaks with contemporary idioms and references to diseases and social constructs that his medieval associates have no clue about. It is not explained how he knows things they don’t. He references his Wise Man Willow as maybe being the source but as a reader we aren’t told how this applies. I had to look up Wise Man Willow in mythology to get an idea of what he was talking about. And there were some other details that were touched on and never revisited. I wonder if this was an editing error.
As a character we see Harkness grow out of being self centered and begin to put his friends’ needs ahead of his own. Really well thought out encounters with the trials he has to face (I won’t spoil it for anyone ) but awful suffering. Extremely creative! The ending is surprisingly poignant. I highly recommend this book.
I like the story. Harkness goes through a lot of terrible ordeals in his quest. The character is funny and sarcastic, cynical, a smart ass. I did have some problems with details about him. For instance he speaks with contemporary idioms and references to diseases and social constructs that his medieval associates have no clue about. It is not explained how he knows things they don’t. He references his Wise Man Willow as maybe being the source but as a reader we aren’t told how this applies. I had to look up Wise Man Willow in mythology to get an idea of what he was talking about. And there were some other details that were touched on and never revisited. I wonder if this was an editing error.
As a character we see Harkness grow out of being self centered and begin to put his friends’ needs ahead of his own. Really well thought out encounters with the trials he has to face (I won’t spoil it for anyone ) but awful suffering. Extremely creative! The ending is surprisingly poignant. I highly recommend this book.
January 13, 2025
I think my library has this filed under the wrong genre. This reads as a middle grade fantasy to me. The snark felt forced, the plot was beyond predictable, the writing was painful to read. It was not for me at all.
February 23, 2023
Just wasn't what I thought it was
January 25, 2025
An exceptional book that masterfully combines humor and heart! I am not typically a fantasy fan, but I could not put this book down!
April 27, 2021
It was okay. Not great but it didn't suck either.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews