Mimi Slavitt’s three-year-old son is autistic, but if we told her, she wouldn’t listen, because she doesn’t want to know—until at last his behavior becomes so strange that even she can’t ignore it. Mimi inhabits a world nearly as isolating as her son’s—one that she shares with mothers like her, chosen against their will for lives of sacrifice and martyrdom. Searching for miracles, fighting heartless bureaucracies while arranging every minute of every day for children who can never be left alone, they exist in a state of perpetual crisis, normal life always just out of reach. In chapters told from Mimi’s point of view and theirs, we meet these mothers, each a complex, character totally unsuitable for sainthood and dreaming of the day she can just she walk away. Taking its title from the 1950s reality show that made suffering housewives compete against each other for deluxe refrigerators and life-saving operations, Queen for a Day portrays a group of imperfect women under enormous pressure. Rosaler tells their story in ironic, precise and vivid prose, with dark humor and insight born of first-hand experience.
"THE DEVIL ON TRIAL grew out of a belief that what is most gripping about history is the fact that it is a story of human beings in conflict," say authors Maxine Rosaler and Phillip Marguiles.
The co-authors of several books for young adults on subjects ranging from science to history, law, and warfare, Maxine Rosaler and Phillip Marguiles live in New York City.
Mimi has a three-year-old son named Danny who is displaying some unusual behaviors. Mimi is understandably in denial of what may explain his behaviors.
Eventually Danny is diagnosed with Autism, and Mimi may be having a harder time now that she has the explanation. She is isolated and working herself to the bone to advocate for her son and his significant needs.
The author really gets inside the head of Mimi, letting us know how she’s feeling and how difficult and challenging her life is. This isn’t just Mimi’s story, though. She shares the stories of other children with Autism and how their parents cope.
Overall, Queen for a Day is a thoughtful, insightful, and introspective glimpse into the lives of some caregivers, especially those of children with Autism. I think so often we think of the child who has the difficulty (and thank goodness- that’s never a bad thing), but we often overlook the sacrifices of caregivers.
Queen for a Day offers relatability and an enlightening perspective, and it’s done with clever humor and never taking on a serious tone to keep relatability in check.
I received a complimentary copy. All opinions are my own.
This was a real, raw, and honest story about being a mother of an autistic child. Being a parent is the most rewarding and most difficult job I have ever done. My kids didn’t have any special needs and now that they are older parenting is very different, but what if my kids would always need me to be their caregiver? What if growing Up didn’t mean becoming independent and starting their own lives? I’d like to think I would be a good mother to a child with special needs, but I have no reference for this, and after reading this I’ve decided I really don’t know. The mothers in this book were just like you and I, but having kids didn’t mean play dates, mommy and me classes, first days of school pictures, and prom. They were faced with constant challenges, concerns, isolation, and judgment. This was even more challenging when they were not in a Socio economic position to find resources. I’d like to note that autism is a spectrum disease and the children in this book were at the more severe end of the spectrum. I’d imagine that parents of kids with a less severe type of autism have had different experiences.
Mimi and her husband are in denial that their three-year-old son could possibly be autistic. When it becomes impossible to not admit that her child is special, Mimi gets him tested and her life changes forever. This book follows Mimi‘s journey as she learns to accept the diagnosis, find resources and support. We don’t only get Mimi‘s story in this book we also get a look into several other mothers of autistic children’s lives. The stories were brutally honest, there were times I would think to myself I would never act this way, and then I did a reality check, because how do I know this? I tried to read this with an open mind and not pass judgment. This really was an important story that was simultaneously heartbreaking and uplifting. I have major respect for all of you mothers and fathers out there with children with special needs and the next time I am thinking to myself why can that person not control their child... I will think again.
Most of you have probably seen me mention that my son has special needs, so I’m always immediately drawn to books about parents with special needs children. Queen For a Day follows Mimi who has an autistic son and is a raw and authentic look at life with a special needs child. All parents worry about their children but my worries about my son are so vastly different from the concerns I have about my other two kids. I worry almost every single night about what would happen to him if I passed away, I’m his primary caretaker and his safe person in a world that is incredibly difficult for him to navigate as a person with autism. I also worry about his care as he gets older, most likely he will always have to live with my husband and me and while that’s absolutely perfect for us, what happens to him when we inevitably die? My point is, I’m always worried about my little guy and the author did such a fantastic job at bringing my fears to life. This was poignant, witty and emotional for me and as difficult as some of it was for me to read, it’s an important book.
First, I love that the title is from a 1950's reality show. It fits the story like a glove. In Queen For A Day we meet Mimi who doesn't want to face that her son Danny is autistic. From there we meet other mothers and their day to battles with having a child with a disability as well as their own personal struggles. The author really brought these women to life and what it's like to care for a child with autism daily. I have a child with a disability. I have fought the New York school system and teachers for his education only to have him become isolated and home bound that started his fear of leaving the house. His fear also left me trapped at home. A remarkable story that deeply pulled me in all different directions. It's as witty as it is dark and sad. An emotional thought provoking read.
Dawnny-BookGypsy Novels N Latte Review Novels N Latte Book Club Hudson Valley NY
Maxine Rosaler, Author "Queen For A Day" has written an emotional and thought-provoking novel. The Genres for this story is Fiction with a realistic feel. The author writes about the main character and other mothers' with Autistic children. The author describes the adults as complex and complicated, each with their own problems.
Mimi Slavitt and her husband try to deny that their three-year-old son has Autism. They are finally faced with the fact that Danny is Autistic, and now is the problem of what to do. Mimi finds that in the traditional nursery school and school setting, getting funding for special needs is difficult, and she turns to other mothers in similar circumstances to find out what they would do. She hires an advocate. There are different places that Autistic children can go to. If one is wealthy, the families are at an advantage.
Mimi brings up stories of other Autistic children, which are often heartbreaking, and the mother's reactions to their children, which are even more heartbreaking. Some parents are ambivalent, and some are really stressed out. Dealing with children outside of what is considered the "norm" has many challenges. I appreciate that the author has shared the problems of getting the appropriate help to those children and families in need. I would recommend this novel.
This was such an empowering read. Moms have a hard life but to have a child who is autistic makes if harder to make it day to day. I personally would be honored to have an autistic baby. But I was so inspired by these moms stories. I hope that whether you have an autistic child or not that you will grab a copy of this book and take a look into other mothers lives. I gave this book 4 stars. I recommend this read. The Mary Reader received this book from the publisher for review. A favorable review was not required and all views expressed are our own.
"She had never wanted to be a mother in the first place. The idea of being a mother to a child who would need a mother for the rest of his life frightened her. I came up with half a dozen other justifications for her decision. I didn't want to judge her. Nevertheless I couldn't stop myself from judging her."
This is a raw, uncomfortable look into the life of a caregiver. My mother is a full-time caregiver to my father who has early onset dementia and even though this book is about the mother of a boy with autism, the stress and frustration of everyday life is very similar. As a work of fiction, it feels real. Mimi is so real. The anxiety, second guessing, and the deep sorrow knowing that no matter what you do, this person you're caring for isn't going to "get better." You can't teach this person something that will result in different behavior the next day. Everything is a compromise and the amount of work needed to get to that compromise is exhausting. All these emotions are running through this book. You will feel uncomfortable.
Rosaler was a genius for breaking this story into multiple viewpoints. It really drives home the uneasiness of how Mimi is seen through other's eyes. She knows deep down that they're judging her just as she's judging them. I especially loved the chapters that focused on different special needs moms. Each woman handled her situation in a unique way - none were perfect and most were doing the best they could. I don't think I could do it. Hell, I know couldn't do it and would end up more like Karen than Mimi.
This is not a "super mom" story where Mimi discovers a cure for her son through hard work. It's better than that - it's honest. Doing this kind of job 24/7 for the rest of someone's life is emotionally and mentally taxing. This is the first book I've read the really captures how stressful that job is.
I received a copy from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
Story: 4 stars Character Development: 5 stars Writing/Prose: 4 stars
Queen For A Day is a fast-paced, well-written, fun/sad read. Considering the difficult topic, there is humor and a lightness. I assume Maxine Rosaler has semi-fictionalized her own story and does not portray the mom with rose-colored glasses in the least. Also, there is very much the New York Jewish flavor in the writing, which is fun. (I did NOT notice “vulgar language” in the writing, as complained another reviewer here).
The main topic of the parents’ struggle to come to terms with an autistic child, and unprepared mothers learning to manage the bureaucracy over decades and obstacles, is presented well, to someone unaware of anything but the surface of this condition.
Semi-autobiographical, the author showed herself to me: the dark and chaotic, as well as her awareness of self and of humanity. She showed the devotion and love of the parents to the autistic child. But Rosaler also showed the ambivalence, isolation, and the varying ways parents deal, are unprepared to deal, are totally unsupported to deal with autism-spectrum and special-needs children, as well as the support and strain on the marriage. Years and years and years, a whole marriage, a whole motherhood thrust on you, and you just have to take it on any way you can.
The stories are great, on the small personal individual level, and on the larger, “What does this mean for us all, for society, for government ineptitude, for differently-abled people’s rights?” Queen For A Day is humorous, irreverent, sad, loving and hopeful.
I hope this book is successful, what with so many kids with autism, adults with autism, parents, family, and friends of autistic-spectrum and special-needs kids. When I had other books to read, I read this book instead; and was sorry it ended so quickly.
A novel in stories....one of my favorite structures, this is an intimate look at a mother with an autistic child. It seemed so real that I suspect there’s a lot of autobiography going on. Very well written, empathetic and searing in its clear eyed view of the struggles of having a child with disabilities.
“No parent...should be threatened, intimidated, retaliated against or made to feel guilty for advocating for what his/her child needs.” A friend of mine shared this quote on her Facebook page recently, and I believe it fits quite well for Queen for a Day by Maxine Rosaler. Mimi Slavitt’s three-year-old son has been diagnosed with autism, but she isn’t buying it. As telling behavior traits start to progress, the truth is quickly staring her straight in the face. Mimi immediately takes action and begins to advocate for her child. She desperately tries to find the proper education for her son and also get funding for it. Along the way, she meets a few other mothers in situations similar to her own. This book gives the reader a quick glimpse of the stressful, heart-wrenching, and emotional journey that Mimi takes in order to fight for what’s best for her son.
I learned a lot from this novel. Dealing with a child on the spectrum of autism and special needs comes with a lot of challenges. I looked at Mimi as a super hero who I knew would never give up on her son.
Queen for a day is an introspective, honest, poignant look into the lives of children with autism and their parents. This is a novel written as a series of short stories, each story reflecting the challenges and the victories that the families experience. I was moved by the struggles the families encounter, from providing an education to attending parties, as well as every day life.
this was a big disappointment. the story took place all over the place from many points of view. the time line jumped all over the place which was confusing. there was no character development. I never got to know any of the characters well. most importantly, this was supposed to be a book about autism. never once was autism defined. Danny was portrayed to be a very difficult child who basically ruined his mom's life.
received this book in return for a fair review. all comments expressed are my own.
This book touched me. I have a brother who’s autistic Aspergers and to see how my mom and our family learned how to cope and manage a normal and daily life for him and give him the best life we know how it really touched me how this author brought out each story of these moms who struggle in the day to day life of having to figure out the norm for their kids. Very empowering book.
This is the second book that I have recently read that the topic was about a mother who has a son with autism. I think that this book was a much clearer and accurate portrayal of the fight and love that a parent has for their child. This book is not a literal story, but a series of short stories that follow trials and daily episodes of a family's life. An advocate, that was to "fight" the district for Danny, only to forget about the case after a deal was struck that would allow him to receive the education he deserved, other parents who have children with disabilities - the weight too much, not wanting to associate with someone is a disability, loving fiercely-but no longer wanting to fight. Some stories, I was happy that they were done and ready to move on to the next, but the one with the advocate kept weighing on me - did she get what was coming to her?
I loved Maxine Rosaler's book about an autism family. The character of Mimi was vivid and real with her flaws, obsessions, and mistakes in life. I identified with the situations in her book...especially her struggles finding education for her son. I read the book in about five hours. I couldn't put it down. I hope that readers outside of the autism community will read this book. Thank you, Maxine Rosaler, for your contribution to autism awareness. Please keep on writing.
Queen for a Day is a novel written with different stories about Mimi Slavitt and from her point of view. She is married and their son Danny is diagnosed with autism at three. The stories are sometimes funny but behind all of them are some sadness. Mimi lives a very isolating life because of her son’s limitations. It is a position she shares only with mothers like herself, women chosen against their will for lives of sacrifice and martyrdom. Searching for miracles, begging for the help of heartless bureaucracies while arranging every minute of every day for children who can never be left alone, they exist in a state of perpetual crisis, normal life always just out of reach.
This was book was very different from what I normally read. It is always an eye opener to learn about what others go through and really see the struggles that others face. I don’t know a lot about autism, but this is the second book in a row I have read where one of the characters has it. I think the way people treat Mimi and her son might be worst than the actual disability that Danny has.
I was so happy the few times when Mimi just lost it. She tries so hard to keep it together but occasionally, she would just lose it! And well deserved! If I was in her shoes, I think I would just scream out loud every day. If anything, this book should remind us that a little grace goes a long way. If you see someone struggling- help them! If a parent can’t get their kid to stop screaming- it might be for a reason much more than you understand. Different doesn’t mean bad- so be kind. Every parent has a hard job, but parents that have children with disabilities never get to stop. I wanted to reach through this book and hug Mimi so many times and tell her she is doing the best she can. Tell her to stay strong and positive. Tell her to enjoy the little wins because that may be all she gets.
I received this for honest Review. Thank you @suzyapprovedbookreviews @suzyapprovedbooktours for the free copy.
This is the first time reading anything from this author. I'm so grateful that I got the opportunity to review her book cuz its so good. I'm giving this a 4.5 stars ⭐⭐⭐⭐🌠 What can I really say but that she is an awesome story writer. I put myself in the characters and felt like I was in there shoes and place. Omg this book should become a movie. The theme and setting in the storyline was just perfect. The characters are awesome that I fell in love with them. Everything was well written and well put together. Every page and every chapter was a page turner. I just never new what was going to happen but at the end of the story I was in Love. Who wouldn't love this novel. I highly recommend everybody get this book! I can't wait for her next novel! I wish I had her mind of story and writing. 💖💖💖💖
I have kids but none are disability like this but I do have friends who child's are disability. I'm always there to give them a helping hand. I have 5 kids and 4 our of have a disability but not like this in the book. Mine are special education. My babies are learn different and are little more slower then there kids in class. Mine are dinos with ADD, Ahdha, ODD, Bipolar. It still hard with any disability! This book is funny, dark at times, quirky, a whole lot of truth about mothers of children with special needs, specifically autism. It will resonate with anyone who at times feels unheard, or had a daily battle with life.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
As a former special education teacher who worked closely families with children who were diagnosed as autistic, I found the conversations in this novel interesting. Listening to their perspectives was somewhat insightful. When I started this book, it seemed like a memoir. Then the POV shifted, and I thought that was an odd way to set up a memoir, having the author being referred to as third person when another character in the book told the story. Apparently, this is a novel, so I have no idea why the book is set up the way it is. It was jarring going from Mimi, our main character, narrating about her saga with her so and husband, then having her referred to as a character when someone else narrated. At the end of the book, I wasn't entirely sure who was the author, but realized this was marketed as fiction. For some reason, I thought Maxine was calling herself Mimi in the novel.
Since the book is fiction and told in the voice of various people, I wondered why we didn't hear from those with autism also. I also thought there were plenty of cheap shots toward fat people that didn't lend to the story. I understand the author wanted Mimi to come across as "bitchy," and she did, and perhaps she was created that way so readers wouldn't feel obligated to show empathy, but could see Mimi as a flawed human trying to do right. As a novel, it was too disjointed to make me eager to continue reading, even though I did finish the novel.
. Queen for a Day is a novel in stories, which I thought was a great format for this book. In Queen for a Day we follow the lives of Mimi, Jake and their son Danny. Danny is diagnosed with Autism at the age of three. The family’s life changes. They all go through their journey to come to terms with the diagnosis, seek appropriate education, and a fulfilling life for Danny.
I found the story to be an emotional rollercoaster. I loved Mimi and her determination to find appropriate education for Danny. There is nothing like the strength of a mother trying to obtain the best for her son. The author showed both sides of Mimi, the mother fighting for her son and the mother isolated, exhausted and struggling. . Queen for the Day evokes all the emotions. I felt those tugs on my heart, the sadness of lost dreams and the beauty of new dreams. I cried, I laughed….I smiled thinking of all the amazing children with autism and dedicated families I have met over the years. . Maxine Rosaler has written the most on point novel about life with autism, I have ever read. I am very thankful for that. I hope this story reaches far and touches many people as it has touched me.
I just finished Queen for a Day and I'm really glad that I did. This book made me feel all the freaking feels. It was completely honest and emotional and real. It wasn’t some rose colored look into parenting and autistic child. The story follows Mimi Slavitt and her son Danny who has autism. Mimi and her husband was in complete denial that anything was ever “wrong” with their son. There were people she encountered who blatantly told her she needed to have her son evaluated and like any mother not wanting to label their kid, she ignored their unsolicited advice. Later she caved and finally got a diagnosis thus embarking her on this journey of advocacy for her son’s rights and a life of slight isolation.
This book resonated with me in so many different ways. From being in denial about my own son’s initial diagnoses, down to the constant worry. This book touched on moments of frustrations, outbursts and lack of patience. Which I am completely familiar with. But it also talked about moment of bliss when you see progress being made and things beginning to fall into place. This was a great read. I would recommend.
Maxine Rosaler's Queen for a Day is a fast paced book told in stories.
Let me first say that I love the format of this book. As a teacher of special education, I am drawn to books that focus on people and characters with special needs.
Mimi Slavitt's three-year-old son is autistic, but if we told her, she wouldn't listen, because she doesn't want to know-until at last his behavior becomes so strange that even she can't ignore it.
I was so touched to learn that Maxine writes from first-hand experience, as the raw emotion and struggle of a mother with a son with special needs comes through here. The novel, told in a series of stories, focuses on what daily struggles, advocacy and the role of caregiver can have on a person and their relationships.
Mimi is a mom who is hardworking, passionate, but exhausted. I was particularly moved by different aspects of the novel that focused on advocacy. Our society has evolved so much in the area of special education, however, no one knows a child and a child's needs better than his/her mother. An incredible story.
Has Autism Spectrum Disorder affected your life in any way? As the diagnosis becomes more prevalent, more and more people are drawn together by the beauty and trials this spectrum disorder carries. There were many personal reasons that led me to obtaining my masters in Special Education: Autism Spectrum Disorder, and ASD carries a special place in my heart. When I had the opportunity to read and review this book, I knew I was going to love it- I just didn’t realize how deeply it would affect me. As Mimi goes through the roller coaster of emotions that come with having a child diagnosed on the spectrum, we catch a raw and introspective glimpse into the head of a mother of a child with autism. A novel in stories, this one gives the reader a chance to really feel the emotions parents and caregivers go through when their child has a special need. This character driven novel is one that anyone looking to better understand, or feel understood, should read. Thank you, @suzyapprovedbooktours, for having me on this tour.
I would say "Queen for a Day" is the "Ellen Foster" of books, but I think "Ellen Foster" was a book before it became the hyper-depressing Hallmark movie it is today. (No, not all Hallmark movies are the same saccharine-sweet I know and love.)
I didn't find the characters endearing; in fact, Mimi and Danny made me really want a drink. Neither was relatable, and while I found Mimi's pursuit of a solid education for her autistic son -- and the struggles the family went through -- sorrowful and hard beyond belief, I never felt like there really was any hope. The book sheds light on the incredibly hard world of the mentally challenged, and that of the families that surround them -- but nowhere could I find a light at the end of the tunnel.
Way too depressing of a read for me. I also was put off by quite a bit of language, and frank passing references to sex. Had I known about either, I would have passed on the read.
I received a copy of the book via Netgalley. All opinions are my own.
In this novel of stories we meet Mimi who doesn’t want to believe her son is autistic. However, he has been diagnosed at age three. We go through the different stories and points of view of Mimi who shares her struggles and limitations with other mothers and although there is lots of dark and sad moments behind all the stories, there is a bit of chucklesome at times. We follow such a vivid character who at times loses it and it makes the story so much more real feeling as it is almost a autobiography of such.
It’s been a while since I have picked up such a thought provoking rollercoaster of emotions type read. This one discusses the everyday personal struggles of mothers and their children with autism. The author did a great job at really detailing what’s it’s like living that day to day that I couldn’t even imagine going through that. This was such a dark, sad but a bit witty of a novel that I would recommend.
Queen For A Day is a thoughtful collection of very intertwined stories. Maxine Rosaler has written characters and stories that feel so real in their child’s diagnosis with autism that you truly feel this might be more memoir than fiction.
Mimi and Jake’s 3 yer old son has some odd behaviors and his preschool urges them that he should be evaluated. Their therapist Stan says not to rush it and explains away every behavior as typical. Some time later Danny is diagnosed as autistic. Their story intertwines with the story of the people that she interacts with on their journey.
The mothers in this novel feel real. They express their thoughts and feelings and reveal the struggles of having children on the spectrum. I applaud the author for writing what feels to be such honest characters.
Thank you to those tagged for my copy in exchange for my honest review. Queen for a day is available now.
This book was part of a library promotion for Valentine's Day. A bunch of mystery books were wrapped up, and one or more had prizes inside. One problem - this book isn't a mystery. Nonetheless, I had it in the house so I read it.
It's a series of stories about one family and their fight to get their autistic son educated in the NY public education system. It is depressing to read all of the negative aspects of raising a special needs child - the reasons "normal" life doesn't exist for most parents. It's a fiction book, but much of it is based on truth. The problem is that it is hard to read because of the nature of the stories. There are some "good" aspects of raising an autistic child, but they are few and far between! It was an education in frustration.
Read in a day. Beautiful, clear authentic writing, presenting the painful situation of Jake and Mimi and their child, Danny, who is diagnosed on the autism spectrum late because of their denial that anything could be wrong with him.
Basically a series of short stories over a dozen years, all revolving around Mimi and Danny (and Jake some of the time) but mostly Mimi, sometimes in her Point of View, sometimes being seen through others' eyes.
The author delivers a genuine sense of the overwhelming disappointment and discouragement and frustration and exhaustion that so many caregivers must overcome. Sad, yet satisfying.
Painful, beautifully written story of Jake and Mimi and their child, Danny, who is diagnosed with autism at the age of three after years of wanting to deny there was something wrong. This book shares a series of short stories over a dozen years, all revolving around Mimi and Danny (as well as Jake). This story shares Mimi's perspectives of her life with an autistic son, while also sharing others perspectives on Mimi's attention and care of her son. Mimi is a mom who is hardworking, passionate, but is exhausted with her life. As a teacher, I have had autistic students in my classroom. This gave me a different perspective into the lives of my students, and their parents.
A completely unlikable character, dealing with her life with an autistic son and a seemingly uninvolved husband. Whether written in first person or third person, it was difficult to sympathize with Mimi. However, I do think the author writes a compelling story of a family having an autistic son.