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درباره مراقبت
مراقبت از دیدگاه میرآف اگرچه عناصر اگزیستانسیال مراقبت کیرکگور و هایدگر را در خود دارد، ولی بیشتر متوجه جنبههای پرستارانه است. میرآف مراقبت را تعریف میکند و الگوی عامی برای انواع روابط مراقبتمدار ارائه میدهد. به باور او مراقبت کمک به دیگری معینی است برای رشد، بالندگی و تحقق یافتن او در مسیری که منحصر به خود اوست. نویسنده نگاه ما را متوجه روابط مراقبتمدار با فرزندان، نزدیکان و حتی اندیشههامان میکند. زمینههای نظری و عملی مراقبت را برمیرسد و درباره آنچه تا امروز مراقبت میدانستیم تردید میکند. میرآف ادعا میکند که مراقبت به روایت او میتواند مدار نظم و سامان زندگی قرار گیرد و با نجات انسان از سرگردانی، حیات او را معنادار کند.
139 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1971
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Displaying 1 - 29 of 29 reviews
October 18, 2017
On caring is a nice little book, which covers in short passages various different aspects of caring. While the larger portion pertain to relationships with other people, it also deals with nurturing your passion. The book is about a "win-win" for both sides - allowing freedom and growth but nurturing and supporting. A child for example needs independence to make his own choices - but needs to be empowered for that to happen.
I liked the fact that the book is simple and practical. It does not get into long winding theoretical discussions and stays focused on the topic. However, possibly more real life examples would have added to the appeal.
A book I definitely recommend reading. It's size is deceptive with respect to the value it carries.
I liked the fact that the book is simple and practical. It does not get into long winding theoretical discussions and stays focused on the topic. However, possibly more real life examples would have added to the appeal.
A book I definitely recommend reading. It's size is deceptive with respect to the value it carries.
June 24, 2016
I am getting married in two weeks, and my officiant––who is also a dear friend and fellow book-lover––recommended Milton Mayeroff’s On Caring as an aid for writing my wedding vows. I can’t imagine a better text for helping someone approach the joyful yet intimidating project of marriage. This isn’t just one of the best books I’ve read about care-giving or interpersonal dynamics; it’s one of the best philosophy books I’ve read––period. It is hard to understand why this lucid, intelligent, and compassionate treatise isn’t required reading in all high school and college humanities courses.
On Caring is a happy hybrid of two of my favorite books from my undergraduate philosophy courses: Martin Buber’s I and Thou and Josiah Royce’s The Philosophy of Loyalty. Mayeroff combines Buber’s style of interpersonal ethics with Royce’s model of a unified concept that anchors ethical life. Although Mayeroff focuses on caring rather than loyalty, the differences between his views and Royce’s are almost entirely semantic.
In the book’s opening sections, Mayeroff echoes Buber with his depiction of human identity as bound up with and determined by our relationships with others. The “basic pattern” of caring is characterized by a fluctuating and active process of mutual growth between two or more entities:
"I experience the other as an extension of myself and also as independent and with the need to grow; I experience the other’s development as bound up with my own sense of well-being; and I feel needed by it for that growing…I often speak of caring for the other, but in any actual instance of caring it is always someone or something specific that is cared for: the writer cares for this idea, the parent cares for this child, the citizen cares for this community." (11-2, emphasis his)
As we can see, caring can be extended to any specific person, group, object, idea, or cause that requires human cultivation in order to grow. The boundaries of identity become blurred by the act of caring, but not in a way that strips participants of vitality or individuality. In fact, Mayeroff believes that properly orchestrating and attending to one’s caring relationships is the surest path to self-actualization:
"Besides the other’s need for me if it is to grow, I need the other to care for if I am to be myself…To say I need the other if I am to be myself does not mean I basically experience the other as a means, as existing simply to satisfy my own needs. I do not try to help the other grow in order to actualize myself, but by helping the other grow I do actualize myself." (40, emphasis his)
Though he makes no biological claims, Mayeroff is attempting to describe a kind of “caring instinct”––an impulse present in all (or most) humans that leads us to channel our energies and habits in order to help projects and people flourish. When we are fully engaged in that process, the act of contributing to the growth of the other is the same as contributing to our own growth.
How is caring best accomplished? Mayeroff repeatedly asserts that preserving the integrity of the other is paramount; without respect for the other as other, one can never authentically contribute to growth. Many qualities and practices aid us in this process, but patience is perhaps the most critical:
"Patience is not waiting passively for something to happen, but is a kind of participation with the other in which we give fully of ourselves. And it is misleading to understand patience simply in terms of time, for we give the other space as well…The patient man gives the other room to live; he enlarges the other’s living room, whereas the impatient man narrows it." (24)
This expansion of “living room” signifies a broadening of the other’s horizon of growth. If we are truly caring for the other, the other will experience possibility and openness of conduct, but not without structure or direction. We help by opening doors and clearing paths for the other, but refrain from walking the path ourselves or insisting on the manner in which it must be traversed.
Caring is a balancing act, with the needs, desires, and perceptions of each participant constantly informing the situation. Nothing vanishes into or becomes consumed by the relationship, but new qualities and potentials are born from it. Betrayals and lapses cannot be avoided, but they can be overcome when when we realize that a failure to care for the other is also a failure of self-care:
"Just as an honorable man betrays himself in breaking his word to another, guilt in caring is not simply an expression of my betrayal of the other; it is also an expression of self-betrayal. Conscience calls me back to the other and to myself. Through overcoming the break with the other, I overcome the break within myself." (46, emphasis his)
The latter sections of On Caring parallel Royce’s thinking by focusing on how caring bestows meaning and organization on human activities. Royce’s theory of loyalty posits loyalty as the hub of one’s ethical and practical existence, and Mayeroff’s theory of caring does the same with a different semantic veil:
"Caring has a way of ordering activities and values around itself; it becomes primary and other activities and values come to be secondary…Such ordering is not felt as an imposition from outside which denies me and closes me to life; rather, it is unforced and, like a natural unfolding, emerges from within life. It is liberating in that it opens me up more fully to life and brings me more in touch with myself and others." (65-6)
One who diligently and carefully cultivates caring relationships will experience a deep kind of satisfaction that Mayeroff calls being “in-place”:
"My feeling of being in-place is not entirely subjective, and it is not merely a feeling, for it expresses my actual involvements with others in the world. Place is not something I have, as if it were a possession. Rather I am in-place because of the way I relate to others. And place must be continually renewed and reaffirmed; it is not assured once and for all, for it is our response to the need of others to grow which gives us place…We may think of ourselves as restless, in some deep-seated sense, until we find our unique place, and of being in-place as coming to rest, but this rest is dynamic rather than static." (69)
This “dynamic rest” is a blend of security and activity, one in which the bonds that make up caring relationships are always being examined, rewoven, strengthened, and sometimes repaired. Since this process requires energy and attention, the number of truly caring relationships we can sustain is “always small, for we cannot really be devoted to many things at the same time” (72).
If caring involves valuing quality over quantity, we must exercise great scrutiny when designing our palette of caring relationships. For Mayeroff, this means finding our “appropriate others,” (a more modern term is perhaps one’s “logical (as opposed to biological) family”):
"My appropriate others complement me, they enable me to be complete, somewhat as playing music enables the musician to be himself…This sense of completeness does not mean the end of growth, as if one were now somehow finished; rather, it goes with being in the best position for further growth…To be in-place then is living that is centered and integrated by my caring for my appropriate others, one of whom, to repeat, must always be myself." (72-3)
Those who are in-place experience contentment and clarity rather than agitation and bemusement; from this foundation of security, one becomes better equipped to deal with the unfathomability of existence:
"The unfathomable character of existence is not a matter of ignorance to be resolved, it is not something to overcome by knowing more or having some special knowledge. Instead, like wonder, it is something to undergo, to realize, and to appreciate. I am not simply speaking about the mystery of coming into being and passing out of being, or the strange sense that I was not here at the beginning and will not be here at the end. I am speaking, rather, about the mystery of existence itself, the mystery and amazement that anything exists at all.
This awareness of unfathomability is not something to fear and flee from, but to realize deeply. Unlike the experience of the uncanny, it does not separate me from other people; it brings me closer by making me more aware that whatever our powers or limitations, whatever our possessions or lack of possessions, we are all in the same boat. This is not a leveling down that does away with differences. On the contrary, it makes for a greater appreciation of the uniqueness of others and of myself. I realize more deeply my own insignificance, as if I were a brief flame in an endless darkness, and I am also more aware of my incomparable worth, a preciousness that is somehow bound up with being a once-and-for-all, never to be repeated." (93-4)
Only in my very best moments have I experienced the in-placeness of which Mayeroff speaks, but those moments were impactful enough for me to know that they are what life is all about. All our ambitions, our discontents with others and the immutabilities of life, our apish jostling––these pale in comparison to a life shot through with caring.
With a pagecount barely exceeding one hundred, On Caring contains more wisdom than most books of any length. It is a profound and moving text that deserves a 21st-century rebirth. In an era characterized by the systemic devaluation of compassion and the labor of care-giving, this book can help us rediscover how to care for others and for ourselves. The first step is to realize that these two projects are one and the same.
This review was originally published on my blog, words&dirt.
On Caring is a happy hybrid of two of my favorite books from my undergraduate philosophy courses: Martin Buber’s I and Thou and Josiah Royce’s The Philosophy of Loyalty. Mayeroff combines Buber’s style of interpersonal ethics with Royce’s model of a unified concept that anchors ethical life. Although Mayeroff focuses on caring rather than loyalty, the differences between his views and Royce’s are almost entirely semantic.
In the book’s opening sections, Mayeroff echoes Buber with his depiction of human identity as bound up with and determined by our relationships with others. The “basic pattern” of caring is characterized by a fluctuating and active process of mutual growth between two or more entities:
"I experience the other as an extension of myself and also as independent and with the need to grow; I experience the other’s development as bound up with my own sense of well-being; and I feel needed by it for that growing…I often speak of caring for the other, but in any actual instance of caring it is always someone or something specific that is cared for: the writer cares for this idea, the parent cares for this child, the citizen cares for this community." (11-2, emphasis his)
As we can see, caring can be extended to any specific person, group, object, idea, or cause that requires human cultivation in order to grow. The boundaries of identity become blurred by the act of caring, but not in a way that strips participants of vitality or individuality. In fact, Mayeroff believes that properly orchestrating and attending to one’s caring relationships is the surest path to self-actualization:
"Besides the other’s need for me if it is to grow, I need the other to care for if I am to be myself…To say I need the other if I am to be myself does not mean I basically experience the other as a means, as existing simply to satisfy my own needs. I do not try to help the other grow in order to actualize myself, but by helping the other grow I do actualize myself." (40, emphasis his)
Though he makes no biological claims, Mayeroff is attempting to describe a kind of “caring instinct”––an impulse present in all (or most) humans that leads us to channel our energies and habits in order to help projects and people flourish. When we are fully engaged in that process, the act of contributing to the growth of the other is the same as contributing to our own growth.
How is caring best accomplished? Mayeroff repeatedly asserts that preserving the integrity of the other is paramount; without respect for the other as other, one can never authentically contribute to growth. Many qualities and practices aid us in this process, but patience is perhaps the most critical:
"Patience is not waiting passively for something to happen, but is a kind of participation with the other in which we give fully of ourselves. And it is misleading to understand patience simply in terms of time, for we give the other space as well…The patient man gives the other room to live; he enlarges the other’s living room, whereas the impatient man narrows it." (24)
This expansion of “living room” signifies a broadening of the other’s horizon of growth. If we are truly caring for the other, the other will experience possibility and openness of conduct, but not without structure or direction. We help by opening doors and clearing paths for the other, but refrain from walking the path ourselves or insisting on the manner in which it must be traversed.
Caring is a balancing act, with the needs, desires, and perceptions of each participant constantly informing the situation. Nothing vanishes into or becomes consumed by the relationship, but new qualities and potentials are born from it. Betrayals and lapses cannot be avoided, but they can be overcome when when we realize that a failure to care for the other is also a failure of self-care:
"Just as an honorable man betrays himself in breaking his word to another, guilt in caring is not simply an expression of my betrayal of the other; it is also an expression of self-betrayal. Conscience calls me back to the other and to myself. Through overcoming the break with the other, I overcome the break within myself." (46, emphasis his)
The latter sections of On Caring parallel Royce’s thinking by focusing on how caring bestows meaning and organization on human activities. Royce’s theory of loyalty posits loyalty as the hub of one’s ethical and practical existence, and Mayeroff’s theory of caring does the same with a different semantic veil:
"Caring has a way of ordering activities and values around itself; it becomes primary and other activities and values come to be secondary…Such ordering is not felt as an imposition from outside which denies me and closes me to life; rather, it is unforced and, like a natural unfolding, emerges from within life. It is liberating in that it opens me up more fully to life and brings me more in touch with myself and others." (65-6)
One who diligently and carefully cultivates caring relationships will experience a deep kind of satisfaction that Mayeroff calls being “in-place”:
"My feeling of being in-place is not entirely subjective, and it is not merely a feeling, for it expresses my actual involvements with others in the world. Place is not something I have, as if it were a possession. Rather I am in-place because of the way I relate to others. And place must be continually renewed and reaffirmed; it is not assured once and for all, for it is our response to the need of others to grow which gives us place…We may think of ourselves as restless, in some deep-seated sense, until we find our unique place, and of being in-place as coming to rest, but this rest is dynamic rather than static." (69)
This “dynamic rest” is a blend of security and activity, one in which the bonds that make up caring relationships are always being examined, rewoven, strengthened, and sometimes repaired. Since this process requires energy and attention, the number of truly caring relationships we can sustain is “always small, for we cannot really be devoted to many things at the same time” (72).
If caring involves valuing quality over quantity, we must exercise great scrutiny when designing our palette of caring relationships. For Mayeroff, this means finding our “appropriate others,” (a more modern term is perhaps one’s “logical (as opposed to biological) family”):
"My appropriate others complement me, they enable me to be complete, somewhat as playing music enables the musician to be himself…This sense of completeness does not mean the end of growth, as if one were now somehow finished; rather, it goes with being in the best position for further growth…To be in-place then is living that is centered and integrated by my caring for my appropriate others, one of whom, to repeat, must always be myself." (72-3)
Those who are in-place experience contentment and clarity rather than agitation and bemusement; from this foundation of security, one becomes better equipped to deal with the unfathomability of existence:
"The unfathomable character of existence is not a matter of ignorance to be resolved, it is not something to overcome by knowing more or having some special knowledge. Instead, like wonder, it is something to undergo, to realize, and to appreciate. I am not simply speaking about the mystery of coming into being and passing out of being, or the strange sense that I was not here at the beginning and will not be here at the end. I am speaking, rather, about the mystery of existence itself, the mystery and amazement that anything exists at all.
This awareness of unfathomability is not something to fear and flee from, but to realize deeply. Unlike the experience of the uncanny, it does not separate me from other people; it brings me closer by making me more aware that whatever our powers or limitations, whatever our possessions or lack of possessions, we are all in the same boat. This is not a leveling down that does away with differences. On the contrary, it makes for a greater appreciation of the uniqueness of others and of myself. I realize more deeply my own insignificance, as if I were a brief flame in an endless darkness, and I am also more aware of my incomparable worth, a preciousness that is somehow bound up with being a once-and-for-all, never to be repeated." (93-4)
Only in my very best moments have I experienced the in-placeness of which Mayeroff speaks, but those moments were impactful enough for me to know that they are what life is all about. All our ambitions, our discontents with others and the immutabilities of life, our apish jostling––these pale in comparison to a life shot through with caring.
With a pagecount barely exceeding one hundred, On Caring contains more wisdom than most books of any length. It is a profound and moving text that deserves a 21st-century rebirth. In an era characterized by the systemic devaluation of compassion and the labor of care-giving, this book can help us rediscover how to care for others and for ourselves. The first step is to realize that these two projects are one and the same.
This review was originally published on my blog, words&dirt.
December 31, 2016
This would be a great addition to the list of books conventionally given to graduating college seniors. It was published in 1971, and it shows: it's ostensibly a philosophical treatise on what caring is, but is really about finding the meaning of life by knowing oneself. Had it been written 40 years later, it would be an extremely popular TED talk. Anyway, there are great observations and aphorisms here, about continually shaping and discovering your place in the world by serving others and helping your proteges find something they can serve. I enjoyed it, and it made me miss the old hippy-dippy ways of thinking that have all but disappeared in these days of "career readiness."
June 14, 2022
A philosophical essay on the nature of caring - that is, what it means to care for one another. The fact that Mayeroff landed this text at around 100 generously spaced pages is really a testament to how well it is written. A lesser author would have needed 300+ pages to cover a topic this meaningful. It remains one of my all-time favorites; worthy of being re-read again and again.
December 20, 2015
Good, quick read. Interesting, worthy perspective. I'd recommend.
May 16, 2024
Everyone should read this!!
February 22, 2021
“Through caring for certain others, by serving them through caring, a man lives the meaning of his own life. . . . he is at home not through dominating, or explaining, or appreciating, but through caring and being cared for.”
This is a delightful book that serendipitously found its way to my shelf through the writing of my friend Kyle Eschenroeder (see below). It’s a small work, penned 50 years ago, that Kyle has quoted in a few impactful articles and those passages always stood out to me. I finally bought it, read it in about two days, and experienced a true paradigm shift in the process.
The gist is pretty simple: the act of caring for others can constitute the meaning of your life. It’s quite a moving message when the interpersonal roles of your existence are considered. Meaning, we tend to think, most often comes from our work. But if we’re intentional about it, we can find the same fulfillment and satisfaction in our roles as parent, child, friend, neighbor, and sibling.
Caring is not easy, that’s for damn sure. But when love enters the picture, what was once an arduous task becomes an act that we can inexplicably take joy in:
“Obligations that derive from devotion are a constituent element in caring, and I do not experience them as forced on me or as necessary evils; there is a convergence between what I feel I am supposed to do and what I want to do. The father who goes for the doctor in the middle of the night for his sick child does not experience this as a burden; he is simply caring for the child.”
Mayeroff describes the various aspects of caring, as well as what caring feels like. It’s partially philosophical (some of those bits went over my head) and partially a guidebook for how to care for someone, or, at times, something. It’s utterly unlike anything I’ve read before.
I won’t say more than that for now—On Caring is not a book that begs for a long review, other than to say that your idea of what brings life meaning may fundamentally shift after reading it. As I was reminded of in Kalanithi’s memoir too, life’s greatest gifts are always found outside the self.
This is a delightful book that serendipitously found its way to my shelf through the writing of my friend Kyle Eschenroeder (see below). It’s a small work, penned 50 years ago, that Kyle has quoted in a few impactful articles and those passages always stood out to me. I finally bought it, read it in about two days, and experienced a true paradigm shift in the process.
The gist is pretty simple: the act of caring for others can constitute the meaning of your life. It’s quite a moving message when the interpersonal roles of your existence are considered. Meaning, we tend to think, most often comes from our work. But if we’re intentional about it, we can find the same fulfillment and satisfaction in our roles as parent, child, friend, neighbor, and sibling.
Caring is not easy, that’s for damn sure. But when love enters the picture, what was once an arduous task becomes an act that we can inexplicably take joy in:
“Obligations that derive from devotion are a constituent element in caring, and I do not experience them as forced on me or as necessary evils; there is a convergence between what I feel I am supposed to do and what I want to do. The father who goes for the doctor in the middle of the night for his sick child does not experience this as a burden; he is simply caring for the child.”
Mayeroff describes the various aspects of caring, as well as what caring feels like. It’s partially philosophical (some of those bits went over my head) and partially a guidebook for how to care for someone, or, at times, something. It’s utterly unlike anything I’ve read before.
I won’t say more than that for now—On Caring is not a book that begs for a long review, other than to say that your idea of what brings life meaning may fundamentally shift after reading it. As I was reminded of in Kalanithi’s memoir too, life’s greatest gifts are always found outside the self.
Read
October 7, 2020 Milton Mayeroff was my philosophy professor at SUNY Cortland circa 1970-71.
Half a semester was dedicated to this book. In a one-on-one conference with him I offered,
'you seem to be saying there is very little caring in the world as you define it'. He said, 'Precisely".
I was overjoyed to have hit on a central tenet of 'On Caring'. It's not about you.
Mostly, because my grade depended on it.
Half a semester was dedicated to this book. In a one-on-one conference with him I offered,
'you seem to be saying there is very little caring in the world as you define it'. He said, 'Precisely".
I was overjoyed to have hit on a central tenet of 'On Caring'. It's not about you.
Mostly, because my grade depended on it.
December 27, 2020
This is a seminal book that I read in graduate school, and continues to haunt me. It a masterpiece on how to treat each other. I've tried to learn more about Mr. Meyeroff, but all I found is that he passed away some time ago and his surviving family avoids l ocity and remains very private. It's a must read for caregivers and anyone who would like a road map on caring and understanding another human being.l urge to read and reflect on the content.
December 21, 2018
I first read this book in college, where it became an important book in my life. Re-reading it at my age has been an eye-opening experience. I imagine there is something to gain any time one reads this. Every human being should read this.
October 18, 2020
This would be worth reading at least annually. It distills everything I aspire to in marriage and in life broadly. I wish there were a book that combined the thought in Care Work with this book.
May 25, 2018
EXCELENTE. Ni un párrafo tiene desperdicio. Debería ser lectura obligada para poder tener un título de ser humano.
June 17, 2018
Un libro que todos deberíamos leer para saber como tener cuidado de nosotros mismos y de los demás.
March 26, 2019
The first four sctions of the book were very helpful in defining what it means to care for someone. The last two sections while interesting were not why I came to this book.
May 28, 2019
A slim volume, but gorgeous, wise, graceful in its empathy. Like Dewey if he were easy to read, or Heidegger without all the weird German neologisms. A lost classic
April 17, 2023
A profound take on the human experience from an ontological and practical perspective as seen through the lens of care and caring. A must read for everyone.
January 6, 2026
This transformed how I see caring. I have very few objections to many points in this book.
If you love humanistic/existential psychology/philosophy, I think this is a must-read.
Great examples. It explores caring for ideas, people, and the self.
I have doubts on whether you can have gratitude for the self because gratitude is appraised as other-caused. He seems to talk more of "pride" or something else in this. Granted philosophy of positive emotions is... lacking.
Some notes for preliminary/other readings.
preliminary - NOT NECESSARY but seems adjacent and may help understand is a bare minimum background in Heidegger and self-actualization (Maslow, Carl Rogers). Heidegger helps with the author's use of 'in-place' resembling 'Da-sein' or 'being-in-the-world' (yes hyphens matter here). The author also speaks of self-actualization a lot.
After reading, some papers seemed adjacent too.
1. Shiota's Handbook of Positive Emotions (2014) especially being the (Smith et al.) Appraisal theories and
Smith's appraisal theories expands on gratitude and other positive emotions.
2. The Learning emotions Silvia
(he calls the 'knowledge emotions' but the emotions don't come from knowledge, so I don't like that term).
In this he mentions 'awe' which seems to be tied to the author's use of 'wonder'. It is inspired from Keltner & Haidt (very prominent in awe - read their 2003 paper) saying 'awe' comes from appraisals of vastness and accommodation.
I could rant about just how AMAZING this book is. It would explain why codependency is bad, helicopter parenting's issues, why therapists can't 'care' for their clients, and SO much more. I honestly want everyone to read this book.
It is very philosophy grounded. I don't think it would be IMPOSSIBLE for non-philosophers to read. The only REQUIRED thing is understanding the difference between necessary and sufficient.
necessary - it HAS to have it
sufficient - it CAN have it.
Necessary - all omelettes MUST have eggs
sufficient - An omelette CAN have spinach.
If you love humanistic/existential psychology/philosophy, I think this is a must-read.
Great examples. It explores caring for ideas, people, and the self.
I have doubts on whether you can have gratitude for the self because gratitude is appraised as other-caused. He seems to talk more of "pride" or something else in this. Granted philosophy of positive emotions is... lacking.
Some notes for preliminary/other readings.
preliminary - NOT NECESSARY but seems adjacent and may help understand is a bare minimum background in Heidegger and self-actualization (Maslow, Carl Rogers). Heidegger helps with the author's use of 'in-place' resembling 'Da-sein' or 'being-in-the-world' (yes hyphens matter here). The author also speaks of self-actualization a lot.
After reading, some papers seemed adjacent too.
1. Shiota's Handbook of Positive Emotions (2014) especially being the (Smith et al.) Appraisal theories and
Smith's appraisal theories expands on gratitude and other positive emotions.
2. The Learning emotions Silvia
(he calls the 'knowledge emotions' but the emotions don't come from knowledge, so I don't like that term).
In this he mentions 'awe' which seems to be tied to the author's use of 'wonder'. It is inspired from Keltner & Haidt (very prominent in awe - read their 2003 paper) saying 'awe' comes from appraisals of vastness and accommodation.
I could rant about just how AMAZING this book is. It would explain why codependency is bad, helicopter parenting's issues, why therapists can't 'care' for their clients, and SO much more. I honestly want everyone to read this book.
It is very philosophy grounded. I don't think it would be IMPOSSIBLE for non-philosophers to read. The only REQUIRED thing is understanding the difference between necessary and sufficient.
necessary - it HAS to have it
sufficient - it CAN have it.
Necessary - all omelettes MUST have eggs
sufficient - An omelette CAN have spinach.
June 3, 2022
به نظرم عنوان کتاب کمی گمراهکننده است. به این معنا که کتاب به جز مقدمهی مترجم آن که مقدمهی خوبی هم هست، بیشتر از آنکه یک متن فلسفی به معنای مصطلح آن باشد، به یک تحلیل روانشناسانهی عمیق شبیه است.
متن بسیار پاکیزه، منسجم و بهاندازه است. مطلقاً پرگویی ندارد و سریع و صریح حرفش را میزند. با این حال، نویسنده انگار به درستی با ایدهی مراقبت یکی شده است و این در کتاب هم پیداست. در هنگام خواندن متن احساس میکنی نویسنده چطور از ایدهاش مراقبت کرده و آن را پرورده است و چطور با توی خواننده هم از در مراقبت و پرورش وارد میشود.
ایدهی مرکزی کتاب یعنی مراقبت به مثابهی همراهی برای رشد چه برای خودمان چه برای دیگران از جمله چیزهاییست که بسیار به آن فکر میکنم و برایام بیشتر از فقط یک مسئلهی حاشیهای در هنگام مواجه با اطرافیان است. از قضا نویسنده هم همین را میگوید و مراقبت را نحوی زندگی و بودن میداند.
حرف دربارهی چیستی و چگونگی مراقبت و مفاهیم نزدیک و در کنار آن مثل دوستی، محبت و مربیگری زیاد است و من بسیار به دنبال شنیدن و خواندن ایدههای متفاوت در اینباره هستم. اگر کتاب دیگری میشناسید که میتواند به جستجوی من در این مورد کمک کند، خوشحال میشوم که معرفیاش کنید.
ترجمه همانطور که از یک مترجم معلم فلسفه برمیآید ساده نیست ولی پاکیزه و درخور عنوان و حال و هوای کتاب است.
متن بسیار پاکیزه، منسجم و بهاندازه است. مطلقاً پرگویی ندارد و سریع و صریح حرفش را میزند. با این حال، نویسنده انگار به درستی با ایدهی مراقبت یکی شده است و این در کتاب هم پیداست. در هنگام خواندن متن احساس میکنی نویسنده چطور از ایدهاش مراقبت کرده و آن را پرورده است و چطور با توی خواننده هم از در مراقبت و پرورش وارد میشود.
ایدهی مرکزی کتاب یعنی مراقبت به مثابهی همراهی برای رشد چه برای خودمان چه برای دیگران از جمله چیزهاییست که بسیار به آن فکر میکنم و برایام بیشتر از فقط یک مسئلهی حاشیهای در هنگام مواجه با اطرافیان است. از قضا نویسنده هم همین را میگوید و مراقبت را نحوی زندگی و بودن میداند.
حرف دربارهی چیستی و چگونگی مراقبت و مفاهیم نزدیک و در کنار آن مثل دوستی، محبت و مربیگری زیاد است و من بسیار به دنبال شنیدن و خواندن ایدههای متفاوت در اینباره هستم. اگر کتاب دیگری میشناسید که میتواند به جستجوی من در این مورد کمک کند، خوشحال میشوم که معرفیاش کنید.
ترجمه همانطور که از یک مترجم معلم فلسفه برمیآید ساده نیست ولی پاکیزه و درخور عنوان و حال و هوای کتاب است.
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June 16, 2020Last Corp Day, I was talking to AmeriCorp members from Mission Impossible and Habitat for Humanity. One thing we found we had in common was caring for others. Our work emerges from helping others to grow, process, and find their potential. In this book, Mayeroff explores the philosophy of caring in this way. He articulates the importance of growing through learning; knowing our limits and powers (explicitly and implicitly); knowing others limits and powers (explicitly and implicitly); learning from experiences (being honest with ourselves); by being patient, we enables others to learn; when we trust others to lead, we allows new organization to develop; by being genuinely humble, we overcome pretentiousness; by having hope and courage, we go into the unknown; by being constantly caring, we gain trusting friendships and our caring becomes contagious. Other CTEPers should read this book if they like to dig into the meaning of implicit words like “caring.” It is a word that gets thrown around, so it interesting to think about what it means to you.
January 26, 2019
I gave the book three stars because I do appreciate the premise of the book. The book is about the beneficial nature of caring, not only for others, but for ourselves as well. There were some points which I would respectfully disagree with. Nevertheless, the purpose of the book is about getting people to care more, to that end, the book is good enough.
February 15, 2023
I found this little book very helpful. I have not been someone who put into action the idea that we need to care enough about ourselves to take care of ourselves.
I have been careless about that.
Now my chickens are coming home to roos (as the saying goes) and I am having to wake up.
It has to do with faith -- faith that I am worth my accepting, and worth my dealing with.
I have been careless about that.
Now my chickens are coming home to roos (as the saying goes) and I am having to wake up.
It has to do with faith -- faith that I am worth my accepting, and worth my dealing with.
January 24, 2018
A very basic introduction to Care Ethics.
March 16, 2019
کتاب جالبی است اگر مقدمه مترجم را درز بگیریم
September 28, 2021
This book is thought-provoking. It's not a fast read. I found myself stopping and reflecting on several occasions prompted by Mayeroff's ideas.
October 24, 2021
Some interesting ideas, but overworked and more imagination than experience.
February 26, 2023
"In the sense in which man can ever be said to be at home in the world, he is at home not through dominating, or explaining, or appreciating, but through caring and being cared for."
July 21, 2024
need to re read asap...
August 25, 2013
A book to read, shelve, and come back to.
November 15, 2014
Read for MGMT 300 at Xavier University.
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