Schadenfreude: Why we feel better when bad things happen to other people

by Tiffany Watt Smith

'A delightful book, full of jokes and confessions' Guardian

A hilarious quest to understand life's ultimate guilty pleasure

Schadenfreude - enjoying the pain and failures of others - is an all-too-familiar feeling. It has perplexed philosophers and psychologists for centuries but, in a time of polarised politics, twitter trolls and 'sidebars of shame', has never been more relevant. Recent studies have shown that we smile more at a rival's loss than at our own success. But why can it be so much fun to witness another's distress? And what, if anything, should we do about it?

In Schadenfreude, historian of emotions Tiffany Watt Smith offers expert insight and advice. Ranging across thinkers from Nietzsche to Homer Simpson, investigating the latest scientific research, and collecting some outrageous confessions on the way - she reveals how everyone, babies, nuns, your most trusted friends, are enjoying your misfortunes. But rather than an emotional glitch, she argues, Schadenfreude can reveal profound truths about our relationships with others and our sense of who we are.

Frank, warm and laugh-out-loud funny, Schadenfreude makes the case for thinking afresh about this much-maligned emotion - and perhaps, even, embracing it.

Genres: Nonfiction, Psychology, Philosophy, Sociology, History, Audiobook, Science

161 pages, Kindle Edition

First published November 20, 2018

About the author

Dr. Tiffany Watt Smith is a cultural historian and author of The Book of Human Emotions. In 2014, she was named a BBC New Generation Thinker, and her TED talk The History of Emotions has over 1.5 million views. She is currently a Wellcome Trust research fellow at the Centre for the History of the Emotions at Queen Mary University of London. In her previous career, she was a theater director.

Reviews

[Mark Reece · Rating 2 out of 5]

I think that this book would have worked well either as a list of funny instances of schadenfreude/ schadenfreude gone wrong, or as a serious philosophical/scientific examination of the subject. As it is, the book tries to do both but achieves neither.

The book does have some funny moments, but Smith has several annoying habits. The first of these is the pseudo intellectual quirk of quoting great thinkers saying trivial things. There is no point to this, except to add a pretended gravitas. It's as if one was constantly greeted by a colleague who said things like: "As Aristotle used to say: 'good morning'", "would you like a drink, as Einstein often asked". The worst example of this is when she accuses Nietzsche of hating Jews, black people, and gays, and being Hitler's favourite philosopher. The latter accusation is demonstrably false, whereas no quotes or evidence are supplied for the former, extraordinary claims.

Smith is also fond of starting chapters with generalizations about what 'we' think or feel about various issues. No evidence is ever provided for this 'we', and it often feels as if she's simply assuming that everyone has similar feelings to her on the subject. These statements are irritating in the same way as articles in newspaper supplements that begin with "we're all liberals/socialists/dog lovers/social media addicts/other thing nowadays". Plainly, we're not all anything, and I'd prefer not to be told that I am.

It might have been better to have defined schadenfreude more clearly at the start, as some of the examples given don't seem to fit. Is laughing at the sight of someone with toilet paper stuck to their shoe really taking pleasure at their discomfort? It seems to me more like laughing at something incongruous.

Hopefully, there are no grammatical errors in this review that would enable anyone to feel schadenfreude out of a demonstration of my foolishness. Because I don't like to look foolish, as Socrates used to say.

[A. Raca · Rating 4 out of 5]

"Başka insanların da incinebileceğini, umutsuz olabileceğini bilmek çok önemlidir. Çünkü başarısızlık bize mahsus değildir. Herkes yaşar."

Başkasının talihsizliğinden neden keyif alıyorum, diye düşünüp durdum okurken. Bölüm başlarında çok güldüm bir de, utanmıyorum, hoşuma gidiyor.

😂

[Edgarr Alien Pooh · Rating 3 out of 5]

Schadenfreude - is the act of enjoying or reveling in someone else's misfortune, usually someone who on some level is a rival or opponent. Not to be confused, this is not about finding happiness in their misery, but more a one-off event that helps you feel some sort of superiority in the moment.

Example; You and a classmate are always at the top of the class for maths but this past year she seems to be breezing through and you have had your struggles. She is a friend, a good friend and you wonder if it is pure jealousy or if you are finally at the wall where you don't understand anymore. Either way, that big smile she has when her tests are returned is wearing thin. And today your mark wasn't good but the teacher tells the class about her success, just falling short of 100%.
Three days later she returns from the principal's office in tears and confides that she has been caught cheating on the previous maths test and has received an automatic fail. Your heart goes to her as a dear friend but somewhere inside you are warmed by the situation. In the end, you have outscored her and done it correctly, she has been shamed but there is a guilty pleasure to it for you - Schadenfreude!!

It is an emotion that we all, undeniably, indulge in. Some of us don't care and others feel guilty later but as humans, it is practically impossible to avoid. Does this make you a bad person? Is it ok because everyone experiences it? Don't believe you do, try these.

Ever rejoice in your team's scoring due to an opponent's error? But you celebrated the error more than the score?
That dude at work who has it made. A stunning wife, amazing house, awesome car, just got a promotion that you went for. What's that though, his wife has just filed for divorce.
The waitress you work with gets all the big tips because she is stunningly beautiful and all the rich guys fawn all over her. But all that money is being pumped into her gambling addiction.
That politician you cannot stand but he just keeps getting re-elected. What a waste of oxygen, people just don't see it, and there you go, another landslide election win. But what is the front page story the following month? His political party is embroiled in a scandal for receiving kickbacks from underworld members.

Do you rejoice, even just a little at these sorts of things? Schadenfreude!!

Tiffany Watt Smith looks into the world of Schadenfreude and to read this gives you pleasure and makes you squirm which in a sense is its own form of Schadenfreude. Are we delighting in something here, and then feeling guilty or ashamed there? The book is filled with anecdotes like those I have laid out above but there isn't a large amount of substance. A lot of going over old philosopher's notes and political speeches of yesteryear but really, once you are told the meaning of Schadenfreude where else can the book go but to point it out?

All I can say is read it and smile or cringe as you do. Each time is really just a reflection of what your circumstances are. Rich/poor, male/female, caucasian/other, north/south, employed/unemployed, athletic/not, sports team 1/sports team 2 ..... and then you decide for yourself. Is this unavoidable human trait good, bad, funny, sick, stupid, or worthy? Just be careful because at some level you will be judging yourself.

[Ellis ♥ · Rating 4 out of 5]

"Die reinste Freude ist die Schadenfreude: La gioia più pura nasce quando chi invidiamo soffre." scrive Chuck Palahniuk nel suo romanzo Cavie.

Non siate timidi, tutti – almeno una volta nella vita – abbiamo provato questa strana emozione che non deve essere rigorosamente ricollegata alla più profonda gelosia e invidia. Tiffany Watt Smith con questo suo saggio ci spiega, senza prendersi troppo sul serio e raccontando con leggerezza alcuni aneddoti, che non bisogna vedere nella Schadenfreude solo la connotazione negativa, ma da essa è possibile trarne dei preziosi insegnamenti, primo fra tutti: nessuno è perfetto . E da questa nuova consapevolezza iniziare a relazionarsi meglio con gli altri e con una maggiore autostima, così da poter condurre una vita più equilibrata perché i fallimenti, intesi anche come banali gaffe, fanno parte di noi.

PS: se volete approfondire in maniera più seria l’argomento, a chiusura del libro, l’autrice indica le fonti utilizzate con annessa bibliografia.

[Wehappyfew · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 🌟

[Irem Tatar · Rating 3 out of 5]

Yazarının aklına çok güzel bir fikir gelmiş, fakat bu fikri tartışacağı argümanların altını asla dolduramamış bir hali var bu kitabın maalesef. Ne Schadenfreude halinin ne gibi durumlardan kaynaklanabileceğine tam anlamıyla eğiliyor, ne bu his sonrasında insanın içinde bulunabileceği ruh halini inceliyor, verdiği örnekler ise aile büyüklerinin yaptığı facebook paylaşımları gibi: Modası geçmiş ve ne anlattığı belli değil.

Fakat akıcı. Boş bir zamanda arka arkaya sürekli Schadenfreude kelimesini okumak istiyorsanız şans verilebilir.

[Mark McFerren · Rating 2 out of 5]

Schadenfreude is an interesting, nuanced emotion living on the border of morality and depravity. However, this book, packed with superfluous examples, fails to discuss enough science to give schadenfreude a fair shake. I had more questions than answers by the time I finished this book. It seemed like the author was more interested in writing flowery prose than understanding the topic.

What I found most interesting was the idea that schadenfreude could serve a purpose for social cohesion. It arises when another person is violating some shared ethical or social norm, rendering them less likable in the eyes of their peers. Maybe it’s a necessary emotion which subconsciously orients our sense of justice and ensures that fairness reigns in our society? Perhaps it’s a kind of mental shortcut our brain uses to save us the trouble of reasoning how and when to deal punishment to keep peace?

Fun thought experiments, but only just.

[Aimee · Rating 4 out of 5]

I found parts of this book to be LOL funny. The author takes a topic getting mirth from someone else's mishap. The book dives into psychology, literature, etc. as it examines the topic. The reader may just find that it gives them a little more perspective and possibly more able to laugh at themselves next time they do something foolish. Of course, we would never do anything foolish ;).

Thanks to Netgalley for providing an advanced reading copy for an honest review.

[Zephyr · Rating 3 out of 5]

easy to read but the topic or the concept might be actually a bit limited for writing a book that long. that's why it had to repeat itself at some points. but still, good to read as a kind of snack.

[Michelle · Rating 2 out of 5]

I was very torn between three stars and two - I may or may not go back to change my rating at some point.
I had hoped for a rigorous discussion of why we feel Schadenfreude and whether we should; maybe this is where I am at fault. Instead, the book is part "philosophical" and part "funny stories". I thought the writing was on point in some passages, but over-indulgent in others. Not all passages added something to the book. The way the book is divided in chapters felt a bit artificial; the structure and where the writer was going with her arguments was unclear. Overall it could have been more tightly written. I found myself wishing that it would just end.
Still it had some good insights, some good moments. I leave this book feeling that Schadenfreude really is ok (but also perhaps not); that it is trying to tell us something; that it is just a human emotion, and people feel funny emotions sometimes.

[Andrew H · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not as profound as the author's book on human emotions, which can be read as a series of mini essays. Being released just before Christmas, this volume is an attempt to reach the whimsical rather than literary market. Schadenfreude, finding joy in another's misfortune, is an ever-increasing human emotion, according to the author, which would seem to be true as it has become the focus of so much modern comedy. I found the book entertaining, but got bored with some of its scatological humour, and ultimately felt that the book, for a New Generation Thinker, lacked intellectual rigour and settled for humour rather than cultural analysis. A banana skin book.

[Allie · Rating 3 out of 5]

duuuulllllllll. didn't finish last 30 pages

[Alejandro González · Rating 3 out of 5]

Es entretenido, pero no como para un libro completo, aunque sea uno corto. Lo podrían resumir en un algún tipo de reportaje y publicarlo en Gamba Académico.

[Paul Snelling · Rating 2 out of 5]

I was expecting something a bit more challenging than some musing and a few funny stories. I can’t recall Nietzsche and Bertie Wooster in the same paragraph before. But it was an easy enough read.

[Elif Özce Dayıbaş · Rating 4 out of 5]

Schadenfreude, almanca zarar anlamına gelen schaden ve sevinç, mutluluk anlamlarına gelen freude kelimesinin birleşmelerinden oluşmuş bir sözcük. Başkasının talihsizliğinden duyulan keyif, haz anlamına geliyor. Ama bu haz sizi yanıltmasın, tabikide saditçe bir hazdan söz etmiyor. Kitapta verilen en açıklayıcı örneği, film izlerken kötü adamın kendi tuzağına düşmesi ve bundan aldığımız keyif olarak anlatılmış. Peki nedir bu Schadenfreude’un kökeni? Kitapta bunu beş ana tema altında ele alınmış. İlki kişinin talihsiz bir durumdan aldığı oportünist haz, yukarda verdiğim örnek buna tam olarak uyuyor. İkincisi yetersizlik hissimiz. Hepimiz kendimizi kaçınılmaz olarak başkalarıyla kıyaslıyoruz. Üçüncüsü adalet duygumuz, haklı olduğumuzu düşündüğümüz ve adaletin yerini bulduğunu hissettiğimiz durumlar karşısında hepimiz ciddi bir rahatlama duyuyoruz değil mi? Dördüncü olarak bunu bir soluklanma olarak görmemiz. Nietzsche’nin dediği gibi, Schadenfreude iktidarsızın intikamıdır. Beşinci ve son olarak ise korkunç trajediler ve ölümlerden ziyade, minik sıkıntı ve gaflara sevinmek olarak düşünülmüş.
Peki ya bu Schadenfreude kötü bir şey mi? Kitap bize bunu iyi ya da kötü bir şey olarak sunmuyor, çoğunlukla da zararsız bir eğlence olduğunu öne sürüyor. Hatta bazı faydalarından da bahsetmiş, kendimizi değersiz buluyorken iyi hissetmemizi sağlayabilir, herkesin zaman zaman başarısız olabilceğini gösterir ve bizi bir şeyler için teşvik edebilir. Schadenfreude sizi tanımlamaz, sadece duygularımızın ne kadar esnek olabileceğini, endişe yaşarken aynı anda hazzı da yaşayabileceğimizin mümkün olduğunun bir kanıtıdır. Schadenfreudunuzu itiraf edebilirseniz belki rahatlayabilirsiniz, son olarak da eğer bir kişinin Schadenfreudenun kurbanıysanız, değerli bir rakip olarak görülüyorsunuz demektir. Schadenfreude bir kusur olabilir evet ama sandığımız kadar şeytani bir şey değil ve hepimiz ona muhtacız :)

[Andrew Corsini · Rating 2 out of 5]

A rather unpleasant book, I found. The two-star rating is due to the fact that, for better or for worse, I rarely experience the title phenomenon. I have the opposite problem, far too much empathy, which in the best of circumstances means I can easily see said embarrassments from the perspective of the poor victim but, in the worst, means I end up identifying with exactly the wrong people. Funnily enough, I read this book on the train and, not understanding the reservation system, had sat in the seats of two women. I did not understand the lighting reservation system and told them the seats were not reserved (as the paper ticket system had been normal on GWR rail) but upon, realizing, apologised and moved, however they continued to berate me with quite personal language. Later, overhearing the conductor explaining to them they had the wrong tickets and would have to pay extra, I could not resist looking back and grinning.

[Tsunn · Rating 3 out of 5]

Baca buku ini rasanya kaya lagi diingatkan kalau entah bagaimana kita selama ini lebih sering punya kecenderungan untuk lebih merasa bahagia saat melihat kegagalan orang lain dibanding kesuksesan kita sendiri. Bahkan seringnya kebahagiaan yang kita dapat dari sebuah kesuksesan sejatinya adalah perasaan lebih unggul dari lawan kita.

Ini membuatku jadi berpikir, apakah dokrin bersyukur yang dibangun oleh masyarakat mengenai kita jauh lebih beruntung dari pada orang-orang di bawah derajat kita turut andil dalam proses kembang biak schadenfreude ini dan membuat kita menganggap hal itu adalah hal yang lumrah?

Setelah menyelesaikan buku ini aku pribadi jadi berpikir lebih jauh tentang batas moral yang harus kusiapkan dan bagaimana agar schadenfreude ini nantinya tidak merusak, baik untukku maupun orang lain.

[Erikka · Rating 4 out of 5]

A great little assessment of a curious psychological phenomenon. I appreciated how the author broke down the chapters into categories that seemed to flow nicely from one to the other. I also liked her afterword section that solidified her message succinctly. I will probably have trouble getting this for my library as it is British, but I will certainly look to order it!

[Chinchilla_clouds · Rating 3 out of 5]

Ευχάριστη, σύντομη ανάλυση του πως λειτουργεί η χαιρεκακία κοινωνικά, του γιατί υπάρχει ως μάλλον ασυνείδητη ορμή - ταμπού και πως μπορούμε εν μέρει να την αποδαιμονοποιήσουμε.

[Edward Sullivan · Rating 3 out of 5]

A slim but amusing exploration of the common human impulse to revel in someone's misfortunes.

[Εva · Rating 1 out of 5]

...ακόμη ένα βιβλίο, το οποίο χρησιμοποιεί μια ξενόγλωσση λέξη ως τσιτάτο για να στήσει γύρω της μια υποτιθέμενη, αλλά αυτοαναιρούμενη, φιλοσοφία ζωής.

[Cynthia · Rating 4 out of 5]

A nice, quick reading palate cleanser.

[Celine Pattni · Rating 3 out of 5]

Schadenfreude nedir, nasil kendini gosterir, bu his icin kendimizi kotu hissetmeli miyiz yoksa insan olmanin dogal bir sonucu mu? Okuyunuz benim icin hayli keyifliydi. Tesekkurler hediye icin Zep 😘

[raafi · Rating 4 out of 5]

Buku yang membuka cakrawala perilaku dan pemikiran manusia yang abu-abu.

[Medea · Rating 3 out of 5]

beklediğimden iyiydi açıkçası. ama genel anlamda beğenmediğim çok şey vardı. öncelikle çok fazla alıntı, kaynak, araştırmaya gönderme vardı ilk yarıda. yani yazar schadenfreude mı anlatıyor yoksa bulduğu bütün kaynakları birleştirerek gövde gösterisi(?) mi yapıyor anlaşılmıyordu. bazen alakasız yerlerde alıntılar yapıyordu düşündüğü şeyin tarihte bir başkası tarafından onaylandığını göstermek için. bir de o başlardaki komik olduğunu düşündüğü durumlara herkesin güleceğini düşünmesi çok garip geldi. yani bir kısmına güldüysem de diğer bir kısmını yüzümü buruşturarak okudum. okuyucusunun da kendisiyle aynı fikirde olacağına o kadar inanmıştı ki "biz" demeyi kitap boyunca asla bırakmadı. ben de bir noktadan sonra "nereden biz oluyoruz ya" diye sinirlenirken buldum kendimi, doğal olarak. ilk yarı bilgi yığını gibiydi ve okurken eğlendim ama sonlara doğru çok sıkılmaya başladım. temelde anlattığı şey aynıyken sadece durumlar değişiyordu ve çok az şey öğreniyordum. kitap bitti, her sayfasında, her cümlesinde schadenfreude hakkında bir şeyler okudum ama şimdi schadenfreude hakkında konuşacak olsam hâlâ çok kısıtlı bilgiye sahibim. sosyal psikoloji finaline çalışırken okuduğum için dersimin bazı konuları ile paralel gitmesi beni sevindirdi ve artı olarak birçok makale not aldım sonrasında okumak için. eminim ki onlardan bu kitaptan öğrendiğimden daha şok şey öğreneceğim.. yine de eğlenceli bir kitaptı. konuyu yüzeysel olarak öğrenmek için iyi olabilir.

[Es · Rating 3 out of 5]

[Actual Rating: 3.5]

As someone who graduated with a degree in Psychology, I've encountered the concept of Schadenfreude a few times and was very curious if there's more to it, so on a trip to Taipei I grabbed a copy of this at the nearest Eslite bookstore and was looking forward to having my questions answered.

Here's the thing - it doesn't really answer any of your questions.

That doesn't make it a bad book though, it just means you're better off reading academic journals if you want any real answers. This book goes off on a tangent and doesn't really return, and seeing as it's an ambiguous book in itself, I suppose it was able to achieve its goal in that sense. It just tells you that Schadenfreude isn't really bad even if it feels bad.

Smith's type of writing is fun, reflective of her background in theater, and really looks into the fundamentals of emotion. I appreciate her thorough research (although I wish she followed the APA format instead of prioritizing readability by putting them all at the end), how the book was structured and paced, and she delivered all the schadenfreude anecdote punchlines quite well (I chuckled several times). If you're passing by an Eslite bookstore, it might be better to get another title. But if you happen to have a friend let you borrow this book, it's worth a read.

[Slurry222 · Rating 3 out of 5]

This year, Tiffany Watt Smith's The Book of Human Emotions: An Encyclopaedia of Feeling from Anger to Wanderlust will be making my Best of 2018 list. So I was overjoyed to get my hands on a copy of her new book Schadenfreude: The Joy of Another's Misfortune .

Ah schadenfreude, how I love you. Love the sweet, somewhat taboo enjoyment of seeing others get their comeuppance. If you, dear reader, occasionally savour the joy of others' mistfortune, then you'll probably appreciate this book. It is a well-written and often laugh-out-loud funny study of all the different flavours of schadenfreude life offers.

Thank you to the publisher and Edelweiss+ for offering me an ARC in exchange for a fair review.

[Simon Sweetman · Rating 4 out of 5]

Some good logic and analysis here - actual discussion and reasons around why it is human to find some passing joy in the brief misfortune of others - as well as lots of entertaining examples. Nowhere near as mean spirited as it might seem.

[Nicolás Ortega García · Rating 4 out of 5]

Perdóname señor me reí jajaja

[Rebecca Wilkins · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was one of my Daedalus books which means cheap and on it's way out. It was written by a cultural historian who is British and published in 2014. I was curious. I had heard the word before but wasn't too sure of the meaning. I have been looking for quick and small books to read so here we are. Schadenfreude is obviously a German word that those of us who use English have appropriated because there is no word in English quite equal to it. Schaden means damage or harm and freude means joy or pleasure. Put together they mean damage-joy or more simply joy at someone else's misfortune.

When I got the book I didn't think that I indulged in schadenfreude as I have become pretty self satisfied in that I don't really envy others or wish them ill. But as I read that it applies to politics, I began to feel that ought oh I guess I do have feelings of schadenfreude. Realizing that is very troubling because the fallout from feelings of schadenfreude is KARMA. I have respect for Karma. I try not to do things that will set it off. But OMG what do I do with my political feelings?

Tiffany Watt Smith says: "In this age of divisive politics, gloating over the catastrophes of the other side has become an all too familiar ritual. When it comes to politicians, it is their inept blunders, their moments of idiocy and most of all their moral hypocrisy---their insincerity and duplicity--that makes us so gleeful, providing evidence that they are not up to the job of telling us what to do." This particular smugness is very likely part of either side of the aisle since we the electors pretty much don't want to be told what to do by our inferiors and all politicians fall into that low-life category in the dark parts of our minds.

However what appears to be a big part of the polarization in recent years in the US is that at least one side really has come to hate the other side because they feel that "they think they are better than the rest of us." These "better than's" generally live in coastal cities and have advanced degrees and jobs with high salaries and powerful positions. Schadenfreude or the delight in feeling pleasure when someone who has made us feel inferior is destroyed or at least embarrassed has become a goal in the minds of half of the electorate. The author says we live in the Age of Schadenfreude.

"There is much evidence that we empathize more strongly with those who are similar to us, while feeling a less urgent pain at the suffering of those we categorize as "other." To the coastal elites and particularly New Yorkers who know him best the election of 2016 pushed an "other" to the top of the stack. What is particularly crazy is that this other also considers himself an elite because of his assumed wealth yet he identifies emotionally with the jealous masses who hate the elites. The insecurity that Trump feels (read Mary Trump's book) leads him to delight in the schadenfreude of his presumed enemies and as he goes on and on there are more and more enemies.

Watt Smith continues: "Just as important in my view is our growing commitment to EMPATHY. The capacity to attune ourselves to other people's suffering is highly prized today--and rightly so. Putting ourselves in another's shoes IMPACTS OUR ABILITY TO LEAD OTHERS, to parent, to be a decent partner and friend. Yet the more important empathy becomes, the more obnoxious Schadenfreude seems." Empathy doesn't seem to be a part of the current President's emotional makeup--again Mary Trump can explain the psychological issues that have led him to this point. However as evidenced in the recent Democratic convention Joe Biden appears to have empathy galore (for people who have lost family members or kids who stutter, etc.). If empathy really mattered to us, it would be obvious who we should choose as a leader.

However "they talk not of a loss of identity when we enter a crowd, but of moving into another kind of identity, a social identity." Both sides have come to identify highly with their own side and to crave schadenfreude for the other. Being part of a group or belonging to a team or side is part of human nature and what has gotten us this far. Hence "strip schadenfreude of its moral associations and it emerges as neither good nor bad, but as a behavior which will inevitably emerge when we form ourselves into groups. It mobilizes and strengthens our tribe. It gives us a feeling of swagger, a taste of glory. It creates political momentum. And, of course, this is precisely why it can be used so knowingly and so effectively."

"Yet it is easy to forget that moral confusion is part of how we experience Schadenfreude too--that nagging worry that we won't know when we've reached the line and will just keep going."

That must be where Karma steps in.