She: The Old Woman Who Took Over My Life

by Kathryn Tucker Windham

This slender book, the last of twenty-nine written by Kathryn Tucker Windham over her long and productive life, will be an exquisitely bittersweet read for the many fans of the late storyteller and author from Selma, Alabama. In She, which Windham was putting the finishing touches on when she died in June 2011, the author describes how she woke up one day to find that she had an unwanted houseguest, an old woman who had suddenly moved into her home and was taking over her life. Windham referred to this interloper simply as She, and here the reader has been invited into the lively colloquy between the author—whose spirit has not changed—and her alter ego, who moves haltingly toward her earthly end. She will leave you laughing and crying, but also grateful and hopeful.

Genres: Nonfiction, Southern, Memoir, Biography

114 pages, Kindle Edition

First published September 1, 2011

About the author

Kathryn Tucker Windham was an American storyteller, author, photographer, and journalist.

Windham got her first writing job at the age of 12, reviewing movies for her cousin's small town newspaper, The Thomasville Times. She earned a B.A. degree from Huntingdon College in 1939. Soon after graduating she became a reporter for the Alabama Journal. Starting in 1944 she worked for The Birmingham News. In 1946 she married Amasa Benjamin Windham with whom she had three children. In 1956 she went to work at the Selma Times-Journal where she won several Associated Press awards for her writing and photography. A collection of her photographs is on display at the Montgomery Museum of Fine Arts. She died on June 12, 2011. The 2004 documentary film, Kathryn: The Story of a Teller, directed by Norton Dill, chronicles Windham's life and varied careers.

Reviews

[Donna Craig · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a wonderful little book. It’s such a delight, and a really easy read—just over 100 pages with small pages and large margins. My 90-year-old neighbor loaned it to me. I think she knew the author. In this book, the author tells us about the old lady she finds herself living with—herself! She happens to be a storyteller by trade (a legit trade, as I learned after I moved here), and she makes a funny, thought-provoking, and wistful story of her journey into old age. I highly recommend it.

[Diane · Rating 3 out of 5]

My sister-in-law (she is 88) had me read this when I was visiting her in Sun City, AZ. At home, I am often the oldest or one of the oldest people in a group; in Sun City, I was usually the youngest at nearly 75! The author reflects on being old – she is 92. I enjoyed most of the brief book (about 100 pages) and found much of it fun. A couple of favorite quotes: “… I wasted a lot of time being on time” (p 53-54). That is absolutely me! “How can old people survive without laughter?” (p 40) – How can anyone survive without laughter! But I think it is even more important when we get old.

Near the beginning of the book the author reflects on a quote attributed to General MacArthur: “Old soldiers never die, they just fade away. “ She says that he could have done better and proceeds to give a bunch of possible better quotes, such as: “Old quarterbacks never die, they just pass away,”(my favorite) and, “Old radio announcers never die, they just sign off." I was totally captivated and laughed and laughed trying to come up with my own quote. I CHALLENGE YOU to come up with your own quote for your own profession or life. Here is mine: “Old librarians never die, they just check out.”

[Badseedgirl · Rating 4 out of 5]

A good older friend gave me this book and insisted I read it. Although not Anything I would have read for myself, I felt that at 112 pages I could invest that hour or so and make an older woman happy. I loved the entire concept of this delightful book. Although nowhere near the 94 years that the author Kathryn Tucker Windham, I empathized with her plight of getting older.

I have lived the last fifteen years, south of the Mason-Dixon line. I have learned to love this culture, but one of the thing I love the most is the women I call “Iron Fists in Velvet Gloves.” If you have visited the south before, you might have met one of these women. They always speak with that genteel southern belle tone and have manners that are impeccable, but woes be the person who crosses them, because those soft tones and impeccable manners hide a will of iron. These are the decedents of the Reconstruction and that perseverance has been built into their marrow. After reading this delightful little tome, I feel Kathryn Tucker Windham was one such lady. The things she morns, the loss of her ability to attend church and to cook the meals she used to are both touching and funny.

This is in reality an unfinished work, as Ms. Windham passed before it was finished. I look forward to someday reading more of her work.

3.5 of 5 stars.

[Chad Phillips · Rating 5 out of 5]

Written in the months leading up to her death, Mrs Katherine takes us all on her journey in learning to live with the limitations of her older self. From the first page, it is evident that she is the same fantastic storyteller that used to come around to our Alabama schools, and captivate us all with tells of Jeffrey and other ghost stories. Love, love, love this final book, and this beautiful lady.

[Kathy · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a book club read and I am so glad we read it! Short, funny, poignant. Written by a storyteller with ties to our storytelling center, this is the authors account of the old lady who takes over her life, and it is herself. Full of witty thoughts, stories about her life, and wonderful remembrances that reminded me of my mother, I laughed every time I picked this book up.

[SueEllen Mohney · Rating 5 out of 5]

People who are into the new “cozy” reading trend (old trend, new label) will enjoy it especially. Most people can read this tiny book in a sitting.
A simple, humorous, yet thought provoking reflection on the aging process and memories of a life well lived. A wonderful little final book, of a wonderful big full life.

[Pat · Rating 3 out of 5]

Although just 3 stars, it was entertaining, like visiting a very clever older relative.

[Regina Grayson · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the best, most poignant books/memoirs I have ever read! I highly recommend it.

[Darlenebell90 · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a delightful book written by a woman who has told stories at National Storytelling conferences. It was my first introduction to any of her stories, and I found this book very much worth reading. It is a short book, readable in 2-3 hours. Ms Windham describes her life living with "She" whom she blames for her forgetfulness and symptoms of aging. She cannot recall exactly when "She" moved into her home, but that is when her life began to change. For example "She" nags about uncluttering the house, while Ms. Windham has excuses about how important each possession is, and how she couldn't possibly get rid of anything. Ms. Windham was in her early nineties when she compiled these stories, retaining her wit and sense of humor through all. I highly recommend this book to anyone who has forgotten the name of an acquaintance, suffers from aging painful joints, forgotten to take medication or thought about planning who your pallbearers will be.

[Julie Payne · Rating 5 out of 5]

A comical view of how old age mocks us and causes things that were once easy to become a dreaded task. There is no writer like Kathryn Tucker Windham! Any woman over 50, this is a MUST read.

[Ellen Taylor · Rating 5 out of 5]

My new favorite! Thanks to book buddy, Aleeta Christian, for gifting me a copy. I passed it along to my “old friends” as well; folks with their sweet mamas still here in their 90’s and a couple who just lost them. The author was a fabulous storyteller and now I want to find her other books to add to my TBR stack. I put so many book darts in my copy, we wouldn’t make it through a metal detector! Here are a few of my favorite quotes:
“Old readers never die, they just turn the final page.”
“My father used to say about doing without: ‘Do like the Hindu. Do the best you kindu. If you ain’t got no clothes make your skindu.”
“My Shadow: I have a little shadow that goes in and out with me, And what can be the use of her is more than I can see. She is very, very like me from her heels up to the head; And I see her jump before me when I jump into my bed.” (I remember learning this in first grade to recite to the class!)
“She can’t understand that my regret is that I did not read more.”
“You’re not old: you just look old.” (Quote from a young neighbor boy)
“It is amazing how time can change outlook.”

What a testament to a long and well-lived life! Enjoy with your older friends and family.

[Dawn · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a sweet little book sent to me from a very dear friend who included a note saying "to only be read by women over 70".

Ms. Windham, a very successful writer from the South, wrote this, her last book, when she was 92 years old. What a beautiful job "she" does expressing what it is like living to be in her 90's. What a magnificent mind she had to write such an amusing account of ageing.

This book travels on to a friend of mine, also over 70, with the hope that she will continue to pass it on to other women our age.

[Diane · Rating 5 out of 5]

What an outstanding book! I don't know when I have enjoyed a book so much. I would have never know about this book except that I was reading it for book club. The book is a short read and very well written. I laughed through so much of the book. Learning that she was a storyteller and had been in this area made me wish that I had heard her tell stories. This is a book everyone should read during their lifetime.

[Betty Sotherland · Rating 5 out of 5]

A funny story about our alter ego, ourselves in denial.

Some very funny stories by a woman who knew herself,but refused to admit it. If you've ever listen to professional or amateur storytellers your life will be transformed. Their love of their craft will draw you in to the point where you will become addicted to the spoken word.

[Katie Elise · Rating 5 out of 5]

My 86 year old Mawmaw Ann loaned this to me last week at church to read, & I just loved it!! Kathryn Tucker Windham was a staple of my childhood & as an Alabamian myself, her stories & reminiscences of the South touched me. Love her!

[Pam · Rating 5 out of 5]

She will be coming to live with us all soon and hopefully we can get along.

What a delightful lady and book. She is relatable in many ways. As I age I can see how She will be both good and bad company.

[Jana Gutiérrez Kerns · Rating 4 out of 5]

A simple, delightful gem. I loved reading Tucker Wyndham’s ghost stories as a kid, and now to see her as sharp and amusing in her twilight years is inspiring. I loved the quote from Jan Struther’s “Eulogy” poem: “She was twice blessed. / She was happy. And she knew it.” Truth!

[Jamie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Having read Jeffrey stories over many years as a children's librarian, I was totally enchanted with Kathryn Tucker Windham and "She". Thank you for all the incredible stories you gave us right up til your death.

[David Wean · Rating 3 out of 5]

I guess I was more interested in the device (someone taking over your life as a metaphor for aging) than the reminiscences, but they were mildly interesting as well.

Back to the Little Free Library you go!

[Lyn Smith · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a wonderful take on aging. It was so enjoyable, I wished it had been a longer read. Katherine’s sense of humour shines through and those of us nearing a certain age will immediately recognise our own “SHE” slowly creeping into our lives

[Charlinia · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great read! Interesting, funny, and gives more insight on what Kathryn Tucker Windham thought about aging.

[Sarah Jones · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is one of the most delightful books I have read in a while. Though twenty or so years younger than Kathryn when she wrote this, I have already met my She.

[Artie · Rating 5 out of 5]

A short but very charming book.

[~mad · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sweet little book of essays about the old woman who took over her life (in her 90’s).

I highly recommend!

[Terri Johnson · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a sweet book. I was lucky to have seen Kathryn Tucker Windham at storytelling festivals. Reading this little book was like hear tales from an old friend.

[Melanie · Rating 3 out of 5]

She refers to the "old woman" who has taken over the author's body as she ages and will no longer allow her to do many of the things she used to do. It is very short and poignant.

[Joanna’s Reading Rainbow · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5 Stars. It’s about aging — how a 91 year old woman created an alter ego named ‘She’ to explain how old age quickly crept up on her. It’s funny and surprisingly already relatable.

[Nicole · Rating 4 out of 5]

Short, entertaining look at growing old through anecdotal narrative.

[Spooky · Rating 5 out of 5]

Nostalgic, insightful, and comfortable.

[Wendy Eskew · Rating 5 out of 5]

Recollections of a legend

This book will make you laugh and misty eyed all at the same time. Mrs. Windham never lost her talent for writing.