Finding Your Way to Say Goodbye: Comfort for the Dying and Those Who Care for Them

by Harold Ivan Smith

Written by a person who has been comforting and counselling terminally ill people for years, this book offers guidance, support, and encouragement for both those who are approaching death as well as their families, friends, counselors, medical and hospice practicioners, and chaplains. Consisting of short "chapters," each including a spiritual reflection, Smith moves the reader or caregiver from "admitting that you know" to "finishing the race." Along the way comfort and guidance are offered on issues such Releasing Control, Dealing with Privacy, Crying, Partnering with Physicians, Embracing God, Expressing Anger, Forgiving, Reviewing Your Life, Making a Valid Will, Making Visitors Comfortable, Telling Your Stories, and Composing Your Goodbyes.

224 pages, Paperback

First published August 1, 2002

About the author

Harold Ivan Smith, 1947-

Harold Ivan Smith, MA, ED.S., FT, DMin, is a national speaker, noted author, experienced counselor and grief educator. He has presented bereavement workshops across the country, training more than 20,000 professionals and lay caregivers during a thirty-year career. Seminar and conference attendees rave about interactions with Harold Ivan, and his insightful gifts of helping, healing, and facilitating grief.

A prolific writer, he has authored dozens of books and resources, included best seller, A Decembered Grief: Living with Loss When Others are Celebrating. Also among his titles are Griefkeeping: Learning How Long Grief Lasts; ABCs of Healthy Bereavement; Grievers Ask, When You Don’t Know What to Say; When Your Friend Dies; Finding Your Way to Say Goodbye: Comfort for the Dying and Those Who Care for Them; and Grieving the Death of a Father. His newest book, Using Biographical and Historical Grief Narratives With The Bereaving (Routledge).

He is also an authority of the griefs of American Presidents and First Ladies. He facilitates Grief Gatherings, an innovative storytelling program at Saint Luke’s Hospital in Kansas City, Missouri, where he is a member of the teaching faculty. Harold Ivan is active in the Association for Death Education and Counseling (ADEC) and is designated a Fellow in Thanatology (FT).

Reviews

[Ann Miller · Rating 3 out of 5]

Most people want a “good death”, one in which they die quietly in their sleep with no pain or suffering, but a high percentage die in pain, suffering emotionally, tubes, and wires attached everywhere, drugged, and too often in loud and bright place. The author has held the hands of the dying for years and has written this book to help, whether you are the one with the terminal diagnosis or the one caring for the dying. some helpful ideas.

[Greta P Allendorf · Rating 1 out of 5]

I just wish I had known the book was written assuming the reader would be a Christian. There was a lot I couldn't relate to.