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Die Kraft der Liebe: Über Haben und Sein, Liebe und Gewalt, Leben und Tod
=The Power of Love: Do & About His love & violence, Life & death
164 pages, Hardcover
Published February 22, 2005
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About the author
Erich Fromm
447 books5,299 followersErich Fromm, Ph.D. (Sociology, University of Heidelberg, 1922) was a German-American social psychologist, psychoanalyst, sociologist, humanistic philosopher, and democratic socialist. He was a German Jew who fled the Nazi regime and settled in the United States. He was one of the founders of The William Alanson White Institute of Psychiatry, Psychoanalysis and Psychology in New York City and was associated with the Frankfurt School of critical theory.
Fromm explored the interaction between psychology and society, and held various professorships in psychology in the U.S. and Mexico in the mid-20th century.
Fromm's theory is a rather unique blend of Freud and Marx. Freud, of course, emphasized the unconscious, biological drives, repression, and so on. In other words, Freud postulated that our characters were determined by biology. Marx, on the other hand, saw people as determined by their society, and most especially by their economic systems.
Fromm explored the interaction between psychology and society, and held various professorships in psychology in the U.S. and Mexico in the mid-20th century.
Fromm's theory is a rather unique blend of Freud and Marx. Freud, of course, emphasized the unconscious, biological drives, repression, and so on. In other words, Freud postulated that our characters were determined by biology. Marx, on the other hand, saw people as determined by their society, and most especially by their economic systems.
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Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews
January 14, 2021
Lesen! Unbedingt lesen!!! Es ist so erhellend und erschreckend zugleich.
October 22, 2025
What have I learned from The Art of Loving by Erich Fromm
10 out of 10
Why haven’t I read this like one hundred years ago…that is one thought, compensated, perhaps diluted by the idea that this sounds a bit rich, or too ambitious, especially given the size of the book and the magnitude of the subject…how can one learn the Art of Love in no more than a few hours, by assimilating 133 pages…it sounds too much like one of those fast food for the brain self-help books that propose to teach us how to anything in one day, or maybe a few minutes, juts by spending money for the wisdom packed in a short guide…only Erich Fromm is no charlatan and his approach is scientific….which could be a problem.
We are used with the subject of love as omnipresent in poems – as a ‘many-splendored thing’ or ‘Love is not love Which alters when it alteration finds, Or bends with the remover to remove O no! it is an ever-fixed mark That looks on tempests and is never shaken’- and literature in general – one of our local luminaries ended one of his novels with a very much quoted ‘if there is no love, then there is nothing’ – and the under signed has a favorite work that has influenced him since adolescence, a short story by Thomas Mann, from which we gather that we find love only in art – ironically, psychoanalyst Erich Fromm suggests there is the Art of Love too, not only love in art – and there is a character that is appalled at the frequency with which humans say ‘they love somebody, there are no words to express that…
On the contrary, the personage explains, Love is the feeling that has no correspondence in real life, seeing as it implies a never ending attachment, a richness of feeling, an eternal dedication and loyalty that we never actually see, for though we profess to love, when push comes to shove, if this claim is tested, then the great lovers run away and do not prove the strength, durability of the intense emotions, the extreme admiration and the endless attachment proves to be easily broken by circumstances, such as another temptation, the phenomenon called by psychology the Honeymoon Effect – after two years, relationships are severely tested and many do not pass the exam – or the Coolidge Effect…
As a scientist, Erich Fromm explains logically his approach and we can surely find many rules, suggestions and elements we can and should apply in our lives…he starts by stating that we have the choice of thinking love as an accident that happens – and most think that – or we can prepare for it and indeed, to confirm this argument we can also read The Seven Principles of Making Marriage Work, by the ultimate expert in the matter, John Gottman http://realini.blogspot.com/2015/07/t... - when studying thousands of couples for tens of thousands of hours, John Gottman has managed to establish rules, or principles and his accuracy his tested and miraculous…he is able to predict with an accuracy of over ninety percent rate which couples will stay together and which will break apart, after only a few minutes of examination, looking at the interaction…
Erich Fromm has many observations which are transformed in elements of the Art of Love that not only make common sense, but have also been studied by psychology and proved to be keys to success, or maximum happiness and excellent results…I am thinking of Concentration, which is isolated by Erich Fromm and he says that in the society of today – in fact, this is getting worse in the ‘our’ present, when the discovery of the Smart phone has made earthlings busy all the time with the news, messages, alerts and other info and entertainment that keeps coming from that element of permanent distraction – humans are always smoking – well, that is one improvement, for in the West fewer do that now – listening to the radio and doing more things at the same time, when they should be concentrating on the task at hand, which otherwise does not offer rewards and in the case of the Art of Love, there will be no love without concentration…
This is confirmed by the magical, sublime Flow a psychology classic by Mihalyi Csikszentmihalyi http://realini.blogspot.com/2016/10/f... wherein we find what it takes to be In the Zone, reach maximum happiness, and among the elements – being in control, having activities where challenges meet skills – needed, we find Concentration – which leads to the individual being engaged to the elimination of everything except the Flow activity from his or her mind – as one of the most important elements…there is also resilience and Patience which is also underlined by Erich Fromm as essential for the Art of Love and indeed, we can look at the Marshmallow Test and see the importance of Delayed Gratification to any activity, not just its role in the Art of Love…
Love also requires intensity, alertness and Erich Fromm observes that many – perhaps most – are half asleep when awake and half-awake when asleep, which is of course the wrong way to approach life and it is impossible to think of love under those terms…there is also criticism of the consumerism of society, which seems to be interested only in buying and consuming…the one who gives most, we are told is the richest, not the one with the money and most toys…we also need to distinguish between passive and active – meditating on Being One with the Universe can be seen as passive, only it is one of the most active occupations around – there is mother love, which is unconditional, also the problem of men who look for mother and thus are demanding, obnoxious to wives or partners that do not give them that ‘unconditional love’, which accepts their mistresses and even their claim that spouses praise their lovers, or else there are deemed unsuitable, it means these woman do not love them…the same applies to their attitude in society, where they claim the same admiration and ‘motherly love’
These people have the aim to be loved, not to love…’The Father makes demands, he likes best the son who is obedient, who is like him…then Despotic God is analyzed - the flood was caused because of the knowledge that man could be like Him…Modern man is alienated from the others and himself, there is insecurity, anxiety, alones…he or she is Well fed, satisfied sexually-Everybody is happy -Brave New World…For Freud love is a sexual phenomenon…we observe Disintegration of love in modern society…Men like children want mother s affection Fixation to mother, also Authoritarian father and slavish son who looks for father figure…Idolatrous love another pathology, where one Loses himself not finds himself in this love…Projecting mechanisms, when one is busy accusing the other, If I am greedy I accuse the other…we find about the Disintegration of love of God, God who is the partner in business, a remote director of Universe Incorporated
For the Art of Love we need to Practice discipline, concentration not escaping activities…Learn to be alone 20 min or more each morning…Learn to concentrate, which is not possible without being sensitive to oneself, the Example of the driver who is sensitive to the road and other cars is given…We need objectivity, but we are not generally objective…then the issue of narcissism is brought up, with the amusing example of the narcissistic woman who wants an appointment with the doctor on the day she calls, and when the physician says it has to be the next day, she responds…but doctor, I live only five minutes from your office, as if that would bring it any closer to the other involved in the consultation…
10 out of 10
Why haven’t I read this like one hundred years ago…that is one thought, compensated, perhaps diluted by the idea that this sounds a bit rich, or too ambitious, especially given the size of the book and the magnitude of the subject…how can one learn the Art of Love in no more than a few hours, by assimilating 133 pages…it sounds too much like one of those fast food for the brain self-help books that propose to teach us how to anything in one day, or maybe a few minutes, juts by spending money for the wisdom packed in a short guide…only Erich Fromm is no charlatan and his approach is scientific….which could be a problem.
We are used with the subject of love as omnipresent in poems – as a ‘many-splendored thing’ or ‘Love is not love Which alters when it alteration finds, Or bends with the remover to remove O no! it is an ever-fixed mark That looks on tempests and is never shaken’- and literature in general – one of our local luminaries ended one of his novels with a very much quoted ‘if there is no love, then there is nothing’ – and the under signed has a favorite work that has influenced him since adolescence, a short story by Thomas Mann, from which we gather that we find love only in art – ironically, psychoanalyst Erich Fromm suggests there is the Art of Love too, not only love in art – and there is a character that is appalled at the frequency with which humans say ‘they love somebody, there are no words to express that…
On the contrary, the personage explains, Love is the feeling that has no correspondence in real life, seeing as it implies a never ending attachment, a richness of feeling, an eternal dedication and loyalty that we never actually see, for though we profess to love, when push comes to shove, if this claim is tested, then the great lovers run away and do not prove the strength, durability of the intense emotions, the extreme admiration and the endless attachment proves to be easily broken by circumstances, such as another temptation, the phenomenon called by psychology the Honeymoon Effect – after two years, relationships are severely tested and many do not pass the exam – or the Coolidge Effect…
As a scientist, Erich Fromm explains logically his approach and we can surely find many rules, suggestions and elements we can and should apply in our lives…he starts by stating that we have the choice of thinking love as an accident that happens – and most think that – or we can prepare for it and indeed, to confirm this argument we can also read The Seven Principles of Making Marriage Work, by the ultimate expert in the matter, John Gottman http://realini.blogspot.com/2015/07/t... - when studying thousands of couples for tens of thousands of hours, John Gottman has managed to establish rules, or principles and his accuracy his tested and miraculous…he is able to predict with an accuracy of over ninety percent rate which couples will stay together and which will break apart, after only a few minutes of examination, looking at the interaction…
Erich Fromm has many observations which are transformed in elements of the Art of Love that not only make common sense, but have also been studied by psychology and proved to be keys to success, or maximum happiness and excellent results…I am thinking of Concentration, which is isolated by Erich Fromm and he says that in the society of today – in fact, this is getting worse in the ‘our’ present, when the discovery of the Smart phone has made earthlings busy all the time with the news, messages, alerts and other info and entertainment that keeps coming from that element of permanent distraction – humans are always smoking – well, that is one improvement, for in the West fewer do that now – listening to the radio and doing more things at the same time, when they should be concentrating on the task at hand, which otherwise does not offer rewards and in the case of the Art of Love, there will be no love without concentration…
This is confirmed by the magical, sublime Flow a psychology classic by Mihalyi Csikszentmihalyi http://realini.blogspot.com/2016/10/f... wherein we find what it takes to be In the Zone, reach maximum happiness, and among the elements – being in control, having activities where challenges meet skills – needed, we find Concentration – which leads to the individual being engaged to the elimination of everything except the Flow activity from his or her mind – as one of the most important elements…there is also resilience and Patience which is also underlined by Erich Fromm as essential for the Art of Love and indeed, we can look at the Marshmallow Test and see the importance of Delayed Gratification to any activity, not just its role in the Art of Love…
Love also requires intensity, alertness and Erich Fromm observes that many – perhaps most – are half asleep when awake and half-awake when asleep, which is of course the wrong way to approach life and it is impossible to think of love under those terms…there is also criticism of the consumerism of society, which seems to be interested only in buying and consuming…the one who gives most, we are told is the richest, not the one with the money and most toys…we also need to distinguish between passive and active – meditating on Being One with the Universe can be seen as passive, only it is one of the most active occupations around – there is mother love, which is unconditional, also the problem of men who look for mother and thus are demanding, obnoxious to wives or partners that do not give them that ‘unconditional love’, which accepts their mistresses and even their claim that spouses praise their lovers, or else there are deemed unsuitable, it means these woman do not love them…the same applies to their attitude in society, where they claim the same admiration and ‘motherly love’
These people have the aim to be loved, not to love…’The Father makes demands, he likes best the son who is obedient, who is like him…then Despotic God is analyzed - the flood was caused because of the knowledge that man could be like Him…Modern man is alienated from the others and himself, there is insecurity, anxiety, alones…he or she is Well fed, satisfied sexually-Everybody is happy -Brave New World…For Freud love is a sexual phenomenon…we observe Disintegration of love in modern society…Men like children want mother s affection Fixation to mother, also Authoritarian father and slavish son who looks for father figure…Idolatrous love another pathology, where one Loses himself not finds himself in this love…Projecting mechanisms, when one is busy accusing the other, If I am greedy I accuse the other…we find about the Disintegration of love of God, God who is the partner in business, a remote director of Universe Incorporated
For the Art of Love we need to Practice discipline, concentration not escaping activities…Learn to be alone 20 min or more each morning…Learn to concentrate, which is not possible without being sensitive to oneself, the Example of the driver who is sensitive to the road and other cars is given…We need objectivity, but we are not generally objective…then the issue of narcissism is brought up, with the amusing example of the narcissistic woman who wants an appointment with the doctor on the day she calls, and when the physician says it has to be the next day, she responds…but doctor, I live only five minutes from your office, as if that would bring it any closer to the other involved in the consultation…
October 22, 2024
Sehr viele nützliche Dinge die man auf sich selbst beziehen kann. Glaube das würde jeden Ansprechen
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