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Where the Light Enters: Building a Family, Discovering Myself

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An intimate look at the love that built the Biden family and the delicate balancing act of the woman at its center

"How did you get this number?" Those were the first words Jill Biden spoke to U.S. senator Joe Biden when he called her out of the blue to ask her on a date.

Growing up, Jill had wanted two things: a marriage like her parents'--strong, loving, and full of laughter--and a career. An early heartbreak had left her uncertain about love, until she met Joe. But as they grew closer, Jill faced difficult questions: How would politics shape her family and professional life? And was she ready to become a mother to Joe's two young sons?

She soon found herself falling in love with her three "boys," learning to balance life as a mother, wife, educator, and political spouse. Through the challenges of public scrutiny, complicated family dynamics, and personal losses, she grew alongside her family, and she extended the family circle at every turn: with her students, military families, friends and staff at the White House, and more.

This is the story of how Jill built a family--and a life--of her own. From the pranks she played to keep everyone laughing to the traditions she formed that would carry them through tragedy, hers is the spirited journey of a woman embracing many roles.

Where the Light Enters is a candid, heartwarming glimpse into the creation of a beloved American family, and the life of a woman at its center.

210 pages, Hardcover

First published May 7, 2019

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About the author

Jill Biden

7 books114 followers
Jill Biden is the current First Lady of the United States. She is a community college professor and served as Second Lady of the United States from 2009 to 2017. During the Obama-Biden administration, she advocated for military families, community colleges, the fight against cancer, and the education of women and girls around the world. She continues this work today through the Biden Foundation, the Biden Cancer Initiative, and the Beau Biden Foundation for the Protection of Children.

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Displaying 1 - 30 of 644 reviews
Profile Image for Lori.
386 reviews546 followers
January 31, 2021
I want you to know this up front: This is not a political book. When Dr. Jill Biden wrote it her husband had not even clinched the Democratic nomination for President. Because he was a Senator and ran several times prior, politics comes in tangentially. But there's no political content, no proselytizing. There is so much to admire and adore in her memoir; I encourage anyone who dislikes or despises her husband to push past that.

Generally Jill Biden had a very happy childhood and this is key to the family she built. The oldest of five girls, from a young age she was willful and playful, loving and loved and with a great sense of humor. As a teenager one of her chores was to iron; when she was annoyed with her father she would add starch to his boxers "knowing he'd end up with a rash in unmentionable places." Her mother too was very loving and had a heightened sense of tradition; the home was filled with love, learning and support.

Jill Biden, not yet Dr. Jill, was invited to the victory party celebrating Joe's first Senate win. There she met not the new Senator, but his wife Neilia. She describes Neilia's "calm" and "warm gracious smile," her poise and "easy, natural beauty." Neilia was charming and intelligent. Jill watched her circulate and was impressed. One month later Neilia was dead. She was driving with her three young children to buy their Christmas tree. Neilia was dead, thirteen-month-old Naomi was dead and Beau and Hunter, three and four respectively, were badly injured. Jill heard it on the radio and stayed stunned in her car in the campus parking lot.

One of the most impressive things about Dr. Jill is how warm and loving and respectful she's always been about Neilia and the loss to Joe, the boys and Neilia's family. She writes that at Neilia and Naomi's funeral a portion of Act 4, Scene 5 of Romeo and Juliet was read, beginning with "Death lies on her like an untimely frost upon the sweetest flower in the field." This line where the recitation began is said by Juliet's father. Neilia's parents and Joe all suffered the loss of a child so it's perfect.

When a few years later Joe Biden asked her out she was reluctant for many reasons but she's courageous and took a chance. Their love bloomed quickly, deeply. Everyone agreed they were right for one another. But she was quite cautious, well aware of the trauma Joe and the boys had been through. She turned down his first four proposals because she had to be sure she was right for this family, could be the mother -- they never allowed anyone to say "step" -- they needed, the anchor of all and the wife of a United States Senator. So when on the the fifth proposal Joe gave her an ultimatum, she thought it over reading C.S. Lewis's "The Four Loves" which helped guide her to yes. The wedding was a muted affair. Later on when she realized she wanted to have a child, it was the boys she went to first.

From the start she brought in some of her family's traditions and came up with new ones. She created stability and enrobed them all in love. She made sure the boys stayed with Neilia's parents, who lived out of town, regularly. They have a Thanksgiving tradition the Bidens still follow, now with grandchildren in tow. It has endured since the boys were small: packing sandwiches and going to Nantucket. It began because that first Thanksgiving they had three invitations: from Joe's parents, Jill's and Neilia's and she didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings by choosing among them. So she created something new and wonderful and enduring.

It's a joy to read about all the other traditions and touches Jill brought. Simple things like candles on the table. Wise ones like having photos of Neilia in every home in which they've lived. Making a breakfast for family and friends on the anniversary of Neilia's death, then giving Joe and the boys three white roses, Neilia's favorite, to place on her grave. She could have gone with them but carved out that time at the cemetery for them alone. The respect she's shown Neilia and the late Naomi and the space she created for the benefit of Joe and the boys impresses me so.

At no time does Dr. Jill present herself as perfect. Believe me, I would never have finished if she had. I can be a cynic and a smartass; this woman is a genuinely joyful person. Her actions speak volumes. Not having been a mother there was much that was new to her. When Little Beau asked her, "Aren't you ever going to wash our clothes?" she told him she does laundry weekly. He said, "You should probably do it every day." And so she did.

Over the years Dr. Biden chose to move from teaching high school to teaching on an adolescent psych ward. She shows great empathy for these kids who had tried to commit suicide, were cutting themselves, other things you can or can't imagine. From there she began teaching English at community college and still does. She describes her students' challenges and her own, being the first Second Lady to work. She worked with the Secret Service so they wouldn't stand out. Most of her community college students didn't know she was the Vice President's wife. She wanted it that way.

Knowing some were struggling to make tuition, to support themselves and their families, she began leaving breakfast bars in her classroom. Giving people their dignity comes naturally to her. And she's a role model; as the breakfast bars were taken other students began bringing food items too. She put out a box. Rev. Dr. Albert Schweitzer said, "Let your life be your argument." Dr. Jill Biden does that.

Despite all the losses and heartbreak this is not a morbid read. Dr. Jill has a fun side and loves to pull pranks. She doesn't only quote great writers and thinkers, she references Lucy Ricardo. She once hid in an overhead for five hours to surprise Joe on an overseas trip. There are many smiles and humorous anecdotes. She was determined to cook for her family in the Vice Presidential residence's industrial kitchen, where the Second Lady is not meant to do the cooking. It didn't go well. She persevered. And when the grandkids, old enough to know what they were seeing, showed up unexpectedly one Valentine's Day evening and found rose petals strewn across her and Joe's bed awaiting his arrival, she was able to laugh about it with them and share it with the reader.

She excels at telling her story. Listening to her narrate it in her lovely, soothing voice late at night was like a lullaby. I wish I could give this ten stars. I hope you'll read or listen to it. Men, I'm talking to you too!
Profile Image for Susan.
886 reviews5 followers
May 11, 2019
I read this today, could not put it down. I nearly didn't read it at all because I received so many Kindle loans from the libraries and figured it would be just another politician's wife's book. I could not have been more mistaken. Jill Biden is brutally honest about herself and her faith and the joys and sadness that she has experienced in life. I loved this book.
Profile Image for Laura.
884 reviews335 followers
November 17, 2020
I loved this book. And I didn't expect to, to be honest. I don't usually read political autobiographies because I want a more balanced view, but in this case I wanted to get to know the members of the Biden family. I've felt for years like I knew who Joe was (because he's an empath, like me, so I feel like I know and understand his core), but I never knew much about Jill Biden, beyond that she's a teacher. In the runup to the election, what I learned about her made me more curious to know more about her as a person, and so I thought it'd be worthwhile to read her autobiography.

I'm not sure my review is going to do justice to the way I feel about this book. My mom recently passed and Jill and Joe come from the same general area as me, but are 20+ years older. Still, I was amazed by the many, many parallels, the continual reminders of one or both of my (now deceased) parents.

Jill is an incredible woman. What made me so curious about her was her "steel magnolia" air, her scrappiness. She is a strong family woman but also fiercely independent, someone who was never happy being only a senator's wife. She went to night school for many years while her children were young (as did I) and acquired not one, but three post-graduate degrees, including a PhD. She could teach anywhere in the world but has spent her collegiate career at community colleges (which is how I started as an adult student). Many of her students are immigrants and refugees and she is so fiercely dedicated to them and to her ability to make a positive impact on their lives that she is determined to continue to work while First Lady (just as she did while a Second Lady in the Obama-Biden administration).

After the four year dumpster fire that was the last presidential term, this administration is a much-needed breath of fresh air for the American people and for the world. But even if this administration were following the Obamas or any other president who actually respected the Constitution, I would still be looking forward to seeing what Joe and Jill Biden, Kamala Harris, and a team of talented and experienced professionals will bring to the unprecedented challenges we now face after a four year term of incompetence and malice toward the American people.

I busted my a$$ for nearly five months working for the Biden campaign. I've worked for campaigns in the past, for perhaps a few days toward the end, but this time, I wasn't willing to leave anything on the field. I worked on Joe's text team and worked my way up and became one of the moderators. It was an experience that changed me for the better. It made me see how work one chooses to do for free can actually be more impactful than one's chosen profession. I can't tell you how many voters thanked me "for my service" as though I were a member of the military. It was an honor and a privilege to serve the team and I can't wait to see what happens in the next four years.

If you're looking to understand more about the Biden family / to understand the incoming First Lady, I'd strongly recommend this book. Jill does the Audible narration herself. She's an English teacher, not a professional narrator, but I'm glad she read this book because there were many emotional moments and her delivery at those times heightened my appreciation of the book.
Profile Image for Ed.
Author 68 books2,712 followers
July 20, 2019
This is a lovely personal memoir. Dr. Biden teaches at the community college where I did a few years earlier for a short time. A few laugh-out-loud moments and the fast pace make the reading more enjoyable. The politics are kept to a minimum.
Author 3 books28 followers
October 15, 2020
Before I read her book, I liked Jill Biden. I could see that she was not a media whore, trying to grab the spotlight from her husband and the Obamas, and I appreciated that she was an English professor. But I like her even more now. Her husband is holding at about number seven among the 2020 candidates on my personal poll, but his wife is number one for favorite 2020 spouse. Forget the lawyers and librarians. We need an English professor in the White House. I was amused that Jill was another innocent-looking, blue-eyed blonde (I met a few in graduate school and in the departments where I taught) who was wilder than I was as a teenager. In her early teens, she sneaked out of the house to hang out with a friend, and even more scandalous, she smoked. But I most appreciated Jill's comments on teaching. The most eloquent passage in her book (in fact, the most eloquent passage I've read this year and perhaps that I've ever read about teaching) was the one celebrating teachers: "There's something profoundly optimistic about teaching. We are taking the best of what humans have to give--lifetimes of knowledge, wisdom, craft, and art--and handing it over to the next generation, with the hope that they will continue to build, continue to make our world better." Right on, Dr. B!
Profile Image for Jeanne.
1,260 reviews100 followers
May 22, 2021
I read Jill Biden's memoir because my aunt, a reader whose opinions I value, recommended it. She recommended it so highly that she bought five copies for friends and family – then attempted to purchase more and was blocked from doing so. (What?!!! This is a thing???)

Biden's memoir was heart-warming and charming, but I didn't have the same reaction to it as my aunt did. For me, it often came perilously close to crossing the line into the saccharine. Her family is almost obnoxiously perfect: extroverted, accepting, and supportive. Biden frequently pointed to something difficult in her life, then quickly backed away from it (pointing to her family's closeness, support, and sense of humor): "a family grows best if we are willing to change ourselves, accept change in others, and always grow together" (p. 165). She often defaulted into glib platitudes that made me want to roll my eyes, "No one knows when tragedy will strike. Sometimes, for no apparent reason, good people fall and fail. Gods can take as easily as they give" (p. 32).

These problems meant that the book often felt overly processed to me. What works in a speech does not work as a memoir. Nonetheless, I am clearly the exception rather than the rule in reviewing Where the Light Enters, as it currently has an average rating of 4.32, with 2,723 ratings. Apparently, I'm not a typical reader.

I tend to read grittier memoirs – I'm working on my review for Know My Name – so my complaints may be more about me than this book; nonetheless, my mother, who likes less gritty memoirs and who I would never send Know My Name, had a similar reaction to mine. We may have, of course, been responding while thinking about the Obama memoirs. Most memoirs pale in comparison.
Profile Image for Jennifer.
340 reviews
May 19, 2019
This was a well-written book, jumped around timeline-wise a bit, but it was an interesting glimpse into the life of one of the Second Ladies of the US. The Bidens obviously appreciate family a great deal and support one another no matter what. It's nice to see that characteristic so strong in the people who are leading our country.
Profile Image for Lisa.
Author 5 books35 followers
June 13, 2019
Jill Biden's introduction to her life is accessible and well-written, and stands on the shelf with Michelle Obama's Becoming as a record of a time, place, and particular American life. I especially enjoyed Mrs. Biden's thoughts on becoming part of the Biden family as Joe's second wife (his first wife and daughter were killed in a car accident when their sons, Hunter and Beau, were young boys) and as a newcomer to a close-knit, extended family of Bidens. Also her insights into being involved without being overbearing as a mother and grandmother, and navigating her husband's political career when she is a more introverted person with a career of her own as a college English teacher. Mrs. Biden is careful not to step on territory covered in her husband's memoir Promise Me, Dad, so there is not a lot of duplicate effort there. She's a definite plus to her family, her broader circle, and to the country.
Profile Image for Lynn.
1,213 reviews208 followers
September 1, 2022
I have admired Dr. Jill Biden since she became Second Lady during the Obama-Biden administration. I was so impressed that she continued teaching while taking on the responsibilities of her new position. I marveled at how she and Joe formed a loving family unit after the tragic death of his first wife Neilia and his infant daughter Naomi, and her love for his two sons, Beau and Hunter, who she considers her own sons.

This memoir just makes me admire and love her more. She opens up her heart to her readers, exposes her vulnerabilities as well as her many strengths. There are many parts of the book that just brought me to tears, especially when she is talking about the loss of her son, Beau. She doesn’t go into too much detail, but what she shared is heart wrenching. (Full disclosure: I lost my father to that same cancer.) She has a wicked sense of humor and lives playing practical jokes. (Her favorite holiday is April 1, of course!) She and Joe compliment each other in many ways: she is an introvert to his extrovert; she experienced crises of faith during difficult times, while he is always steadfast in his faith; he was a seasoned politician when she met him, while she was somewhat indifferent to politics at the time. They both had first marriages that ended and scarred them: his tragically and hers for reasons that she doesn’t go into, though it is implied that they were just so young. They both come from loving and loyal families.

The book is beautifully written, and although I didn’t have an audiobook, I could hear her voice when I read it.

There are some wonderful and moving passages in the book, some written by her, and others are quotes from others:

“ Let a teacher wave away the flies and put a plaster on the wound. Don’t turn your head. Keep looking at the bandaged place. That’s where the light enters you. And don’t believe for a moment that you’re healing yourself.”
Thirteenth-century Persian poet Rumi.

“ To love it all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket– safe, dark, motionless, airless - it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. The alternative to tragedy, or at least to the risk of tragedy, is damnation. The only place outside heaven you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is Hell.”
C.S. Lewis “The Four Loves”

“On June 17, 1977, wearing a white eyelet dress, I took my place next to Joe at the altar of the UN chapel in midtown Manhattan. As the priest started the marriage ceremony, Beau and Hunter stood up suddenly from the red velvet pews and made their way to the altar. They took their place beside Joe without saying a word. The boys hadn’t discussed it, and they didn’t ask anyone; they just instinctively understood that this was a marriage of the four of us. These precious little boys knew the obvious better than anyone else: that for richer or poorer, in sickness and health, it was us against the world.“

“Whether it’s adoption, divorce, same-sex marriage, or any number of iterations of family, the simple truth is that people should be able to define their own relationships. And so that’s what we’ve done. In our family, Neilia would always be Mommy, but I was Mom. There was room enough, there was love enough, for us all.”

“There’s a Hemingway quote that has stayed with me since I first read it: ‘The world breaks everyone and afterwords many are strong at the broken places.’ it always makes me think of Joe.“

“Maybe the strength we gain is simply the knowledge that survival is possible. Maybe it’s the realization that pain isn’t fatal, that it allows you to go back out into the world, breakable bones at all.“

“I know two things as I write this: I am not healed, but I am also not alone.”

“I now know the power of pain, to lay each of us bare, to strip away our pretenses and break down the structures we thought held us together. But I know, too, the power of compassion, like air for the drowning. I know that a gesture, even small, can become an act of mercy– a phone call, a joke among friends, an unexpected note. When you have been hollowed out, these connections, these moments of kindness are the only thing t can begin to fill you. They are the only language your heart can understand.”

“We are broken and bruised, but we are not alone. We rejoice together. We preserved together. We walk hand-in-hand through the twists and turns, and when we can’t walk, we let ourselves be carried. It is the gift we give: our strength, our vulnerability, our faith in each other. We know we cannot heal ourselves, but we can learn to lean on each other; we can lift each other up.
This is what makes us family. This is where the light enters.”

Regardless of your political persuasion, this book is an absolute recommend.
Profile Image for Ashley Jacobson.
575 reviews36 followers
December 19, 2020
Jill seems like such a fun and loving person. This was a really fun, quick read. It had me tearing up in the end when she began talking about losing Beau right after discussing her work with military families. His death broke her. Her loyalty to her family is beautiful and a good example to all of us. I love reading about people who have lived amazing lives!
Profile Image for Valeska.
262 reviews
August 4, 2019
It was kind of a trick of the library hold system that I read the First Lady and Second Lady's autobiographies back-to-back. It was interesting getting their perspectives on the same situations.

I hemmed and hawed between giving this 4 or 5 stars as I was reading it right after Becoming. It takes a slightly different tact than Michelle Obama did. It definitely reflected the difference in their life experiences. Jill Biden is an English professor at community colleges so each chapter was set up with a vignette about that particular time in her life, followed by some of her personal reflections about it. She would incorporate some quotes about the subject ranging from people such as George Eliot, Rumi, and Mary Oliver. I decided that if Jill Biden ever decided to host a Book Club like Andrew Luck does I may need to follow along as I would love to hear her insights.

Overall, she just struck me as a very intelligent woman with interesting life experiences and perspective. I appreciated getting to know her better.
Profile Image for Book2Dragon.
464 reviews174 followers
January 24, 2021
I thoroughly enjoyed this book. I was hoping it was not political, and it was not. It was a story of family, of romance, of self-realization, of struggle, of grief and loss of a child, of blended families, of courage and of a woman coming to know herself. Take the politics out of it in your mind and read it as a story of someone anonymous and you will enjoy this book. I was pleased to get to know our First Lady better.
Profile Image for Becca Foley.
183 reviews6 followers
January 2, 2021
Couldn’t recommend this book more! Dr. Biden is an amazing writer and doesn’t hold anything back. This memoir is real, raw, and will make you both smile and cry. I’m so glad that I was able to read this book before the inauguration!
Profile Image for ashley.
109 reviews6 followers
February 17, 2021
This was an easy-to-read, informal look into the life of Jill Biden. She told sweet stories of the Biden family coming together during times of loss / gave a beautiful dedication to joes first wife Neilia, but overall the book felt limp, and at times- cliche.
Profile Image for Hapzydeco.
1,591 reviews14 followers
June 20, 2019
Insightful memoir. Jill Biden expresses her values.
Profile Image for Zibby Owens.
Author 8 books24.2k followers
May 28, 2023
Where the Light Enters is such a fantastic book. I mean, what a story! The life Dr. Biden has led is truly remarkable, full of ups and downs.

My heart broke when she wrote about losing Beau. It was just absolutely beautiful and yet so heartbreaking at the same time. She said, "I wasn't disingenuous when I smiled at rallies or campaign stops. I just had to teach myself to forget for a little while the parts of me that were hurting. So many of us, public figures or not, have to learn how to lead these double lives. Work doesn't stop because your father is sick. Deadlines don't go away because your friend is dying. We never know what's behind someone's smile, what hardships they are balancing with their day-to-day responsibilities."

I loved reading about how much Dr. Biden loves being a teacher. That's one of the things that came through so clearly in the book. She wrote, "I realized early on that teaching was more than a job for me. It goes much deeper than that. Being a teacher is not what I do, but who I am."

Dr. Biden also wrote so beautifully about parenting her way through uncertainty and sorrow. She said, "Parents are supposed to be the ones with the answers, the ones who can tell you that everything is going to be okay. But how do you make your children believe that things will work out when you aren't so sure that they will when you have no answers, only sadness, and confusion?"

I could relate because I feel like uncertainty, in particular at this time, is what everyone is going through in so many different ways.

To listen to my interview with the author, go to my podcast at:
https://zibbyowens.com/transcript/jil...
Profile Image for Julane Alt.
22 reviews
July 16, 2019
I wanted to like this book and Jill, but it didn’t really get there. Compared to Michelle O’bama’s book which had great substance and inspiration, this book fell flat. Yes she read it, but she was not inspiring to me. It took Joe 5 proposals before she said yes. Really? It’s nice that she continued to teach community college while second lady, but it seemed to me she squandered much of the platform time she had to make a difference. She wouldn’t be a bad First Lady, I just don’t think she’d be a particularly good one. I was disappointed
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for Carmi Cioni Podwojski.
186 reviews10 followers
October 25, 2019
Glad to have read/audibl-ed this ahead of hearing Jill speak at WUSTL's She Leads conference TONIGHT! She was absolutely lovely in her narration of this book. HOWEVER –

I have many questions about Hunter and his crack usage / short-lived romance with Beau's widow / random fast marriage, etc. etc.

I will refrain from discussing all of the above at the conference.
Profile Image for Rhonda.
Author 8 books7 followers
December 2, 2019
Really enjoyed this book, it is not a political memoir but more of a human, personal life story, I very much enjoyed the timbre of the book, the tales and heartfelt feelings that came with them. One line, "She left before I was done needing her", brought tears to my eyes as they totally expressed my feelings on the loss of my Mother.
147 reviews33 followers
September 5, 2020
An informative book by Jill Biden who I really didn’t know that much about. She is an accomplished English professor and loves to teach. She also loves her family and will make an excellent First Lady!
Profile Image for Sara.
1,613 reviews73 followers
January 22, 2021
I'd flagged this book to read ages ago after reading about it somewhere, and I figured now is an especially timely! This was apparently only published in 2019 but feels like it was written much earlier than that, considering how much has changed since the publication. In here, Jill Biden writes about her life, how she met her husband and how they built a family together, and her life as his political career took off while she worked on her teaching career.

This was a fairly short read, so I suppose it doesn't come as any surprise that the contents seemed fairly surface-level as well. I enjoyed parts of the book and definitely came away with the sense that both she and her husband are very caring, thoughtful individuals. It was interesting to read about how she needs time to recharge and how she's managed to push herself beyond her comfort level (for example, with public speaking) when it's being asked of her. The family moments in here were quite touching.

The narration bounced around in time a lot, so it wasn't always linear and occasionally became difficult to follow - especially when she talks about someone's death in one chapter, then they're alive in the following chapter. It was a bit jarring. Also, I felt like this often just touched on surface level items instead of actually delving deeper into emotions or truly unwinding complexities. There was also surprisingly little about politics in here, aside from a few mentions here or there about what her husband was working on. This is far from a political memoir; instead, it's about her family and how they've dealt with various problems throughout the years and how their strength as a family has helped them through it. One thing that also made it feel dated is that she often referenced how her kids found the perfect partners for them in life, yet one of them has since divorced this perfect partner and is married to someone else. Obviously no one knows what the future holds, but this did make the book seem a bit "off" considering what's happened in the short time since its publication!

This was a perfectly fine book to read, but it wasn't always interesting. I did come away with a sense of her being a very caring, likable person, and I wish the book had been a little more illuminating or revealing about her life and struggles. Having so much of this stay surface-level kept it as a pleasant read but not a stand-out one.
Profile Image for Melanie.
1,188 reviews
March 11, 2021
This beautiful book by Jill Biden fed my soul. Written pre-presidential election, the focus of this book is not on politics, but instead, on Jill’s personal journey to self-discovery and her devotion to family.

Quotes I don’t want to forget:
“Strong love, we hope, is the mortar holding us together. Without it, we scatter like a pile of stones in the face of the inevitable; resentments, slights, betrayals, or just time. But love make us flexible and resilient. It allows us to forgive the unforgivable. To become more than ourselves, together. And though love can’t protect us from the sorrows of life, it gives us refuge. Inside its walls, we can huddle together and draw strength. Inside, we are always home.”

“Even when we’re just ordering sandwiches from the local deli, I get out the cloth napkins and light a candle. If we’re going to eat, we might as well take a moment to enjoy it— and each other.” (I love Jill’s desire to make family dinner a special occasion. This is a tradition that has held the Biden family together through tough times.) “In some ways, our dinners weren’t anything special—they were casual afternoons together with homemade food. But that was exactly what made them perfect—that, and the laughter and love and gratitude and love for each other. Not a crumb of joy, but a feast.”

(Regarding the value Jill places on family traditions) “... —these become sacred rituals we return to again and again. The simple act...is a renewal of our vows to each other: I love you. I choose you. No matter what happens, you can count on this. You can count on me.”

“Then a woman said, Speak to us of Joy and Sorrow.
And he answered:
Your joy is your sorrow unmasked.
And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears.
And how else can it be?
The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.”
- Kahlil Gibran poem

“Good marriages push us—not to become someone else but to become the best version of ourselves.”

“And maybe being a parent isn’t about having answers—instead, it’s just continuing on this path of life alongside your children, loving them in your best, flawed way.”

“Success in parenthood means preparing your children to go out into the world and leave you behind.”

“In the middle of winter I at last discovered that there was in me an invincible summer.” -Albert Camus
Profile Image for Kathy McC.
1,449 reviews8 followers
February 7, 2021
Marvelous read! I have no doubt she will be a wonderful first lady!

"There's something profoundly optimistic about teaching. We are taking the best that humans have to give-- lifetimes of knowledge, wisdom, craft, and art -- and handing it over to the next generation, with the hope that they will continue to build, continue to make our world better."

"So why do we do it? We do it for that spark in a student's eye when an idea falls into place. We do it for a moment when a student realizes she's capable of more than she thought."

"That's true of all my grandchildren. They give me new eyes for the things I thought I already knew. They surprise me. And, with them, we create new moments, new traditions."
Profile Image for Alyssa.
224 reviews16 followers
April 19, 2025
the side eye i got buying this at a book sale in small town ohio....open your minds i beg!!! this was genuinely so good and beautiful and not political in the slightest. we love a strong woman whose not afraid to pursue her own dreams while her husband is the literal vice president of the united states. jill biden u are a bad bitch and i love you
Profile Image for Aria.
80 reviews
May 17, 2021
Unexpected lovely. So many warm hearted stories about Jill Biden’s personal life. It is a book filled with love, her love of the families: her family with her parents and sisters, and with Joe, and the extended family. Her insists on holding the family tradition wherever she can, and her dedications to the military families are touching. Her pranks are so surprising and her humors made me laugh. It is a very fun and intimate memoir.
Profile Image for Susan Molloy.
Author 149 books88 followers
December 27, 2023
I picked this up on a whim, and the following quote from the first page caught my attention: Every family has its own mythology—stories we tell again and again, until it’s difficult to distinguish the colorful characters in our heads from the real people we know and love. These stories are true, or at least, they feel true. But they don’t just record our history—they also illuminate the forces that shaped us and the values that continue to define us.

That really said it all for me: “it’s difficult to distinguish the colorful characters in our head from the real people we know . . .” Corn Pop, anyone?

I could not get past the author’s disjointed sentences and no-energy yarns. Writing is not this person’s strong suit, but I am sure others might enjoy the vapid tales, if they are true, or if they “feel true” to the author. I just could not put myself through another chapter of these fanciful and imaginative tales.

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Profile Image for Paul Deaton.
111 reviews4 followers
May 26, 2019
I met Jill Biden in the small city nearest our home when she was campaigning for her husband in 2007. I met Beau Biden at Old Brick in Iowa City after he gave a speech on behalf of his father. I met Joe in Cedar Rapids after an event for Chet Culver when he served as vice president. Joe Biden stayed long after his speech and shook hands with anyone who cared to.

Jill Biden's book is consistent with my interactions with the Biden Clan. It helped me understand they were all manifestations of a single energy and what that means to her, and if we're lucky, to us.

I didn't know what to expect when I bought this book. What I found is a well-crafted narrative of a type of American family that is fading. I appreciate the work it took to write this book and recommend you read it if you are interested in aspects of the American experience.





Profile Image for booksbydorothea.
890 reviews19 followers
June 12, 2019
This book just didn't do it for me. It was an easy read and finally really set up for me at the very end.

The numerous quotes by theologians, historians, etc. really disrupted the flow of the book for me. Also, the book was not chronological and skipped around time periods which made it difficult to follow who was who.

Dr. Jill Biden seems like a lovely person, but it just didn't come through in this book.

Recommend, but see the above..
Profile Image for Terry ~ Huntress of Erudition.
674 reviews107 followers
September 6, 2020
I just love listening to Jill Biden narrating
- I haven't heard that PA/Delaware accent for a while and her voice reminds me of home.
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