Alice in Bed

by Cathleen Schine

In "a sprightly first novel" (John Updike, The New Yorker), "fluently written . . . (in) an engaging voice" (The New York Times Book Review), Schine introduces readers to a convalescent but effervescent heroine imprisoned in the confines of a Manhattan hospital who proves that there is sometimes hilarity in the depths of infirmity.

Genres: Fiction, Novels

240 pages, Mass Market Paperback

First published January 1, 1983

About the author

Cathleen Schine is the author of The New Yorkers, The Love Letter, and The Three Weissmanns of Westport among other novels. She has contributed to The New Yorker, The New York Review of Books, The New York Times Magazine, and The New York Times Book Review.

Reviews

[Mar · Rating 1 out of 5]

I am terribly sorry I wasted my time on this book. Having read other novels by this author, I thought this would be a sure thing. Inappropriate sex acts in a hospital, clueless parents, totally obnoxious characters I couldn't even TRY to like. I will be putting this book directly in file 13 as I wouldn't dare pass it on to anyone else.

[Judith · Rating 1 out of 5]

No idea how this book got on my list, and I am sorry I wasted time on it. Alice has some mysterious disease that has her hospitalized when she loses all function in her lower limbs and suffers constant pain all over her body. Yet, despite severe pain the book is written tongue-in-cheek and is meant to be humorous. Some of her visitors are somewhat funny in a sick way--like the doctor to whom she grants sexual favors on a daily basis only to discover that he is billing her parents for these visits. But none of it is compelling.

[Laurel-Rain · Rating 3 out of 5]

Alice Brody is struck down with a mysterious illness at age nineteen.

Her legs are stiff and she cannot walk, nor can she even move them. Pain accompanies every moment of every day. In the hospital, poked and prodded by endless doctors, she is seemingly engulfed by her ailments. Soon pain becomes her everyday companion, with no hope in sight. But then things turn around, the pain dissipates, and she is transferred to a rehabilitation facility.

Alice's journey through a year of "lying in bed," with very little progress, takes on a life of its own; we experience, along with Alice, this strange new world peopled with others in various states of disability. Then, slowly, Alice progresses enough for excursions out into the "real" world, and everything shifts. Now we see how the life she lived "in bed," has become her world. Adjusting to life outside is almost as frustrating.

At points along the way, I found Alice's perspective humorous and even insightful. But soon I bored of her and the other characters, wishing for it all to end. Perhaps that was the point of "Alice in Bed: A Novel." Showing the reader how tedious this life of Alice's could be. Nevertheless, I would only give this one three stars. Not Schine's best work.

[Mike Cuthbert · Rating 2 out of 5]

The title sounds sexy but the book certainly is NOT! Almost the entire novel is set in a hospital with a crippled teen named Alice trying to figure out why her legs are paralyzed. She falls in love with one of her doctors who is forty years her senior and a hypnotist named Simchas, neither of which help her very much but to whom she gives highly limited sexual satisfaction. There are almost cruel descriptions of her fellow patients in the “Institute” and a lot kvetching about her parents’ divorce and her father’s relocation to Canada to find happiness with another woman and her nine-year-old son. Mom, meanwhile, takes up with the rough Italian Louie Scifo and they move in together. Alice’s mother is a bit of a problem as a character. Schine plays her for a comic foil but too often it appears that Mom is in the midst of a serious dementia problem and the humor pales. If you want to know more about institutional life than necessary, this is the book for you. Everything from the details of amputation to the inner workings of the wheelchair is included in the book, perhaps in a desperate attempt to make it seem as if something is going on. There never is a clear definition of what is causing Alice’s problems but they are, of course, eventually solved and she resumes her lonely life as a teenager. This book seems to have one over-all purpose: to provide mostly women with a book they can read over the summer without worrying much about character or plot. If that was, in fact, its purpose, it was well-achieved.

[Aka Nagashima · Rating 2 out of 5]

Titolo: Il letto di Alice
Anno: 1983
Autore: Cathleen Schine

Alice Brody è una giovane adolescente ammalata improvvisamente. Nemmeno i dottori riescono a capire che cosa abbia causato quell’improvvisa immobilità delle sue gambe, talmente rigide da non riuscire nemmeno a chiuderle.
Il racconto ruota intorno a questo. Alice vive quasi un anno intero ricoverata in ospedale a causa di questo malessere senza davvero sapere che cosa lo abbia causato. Come ogni adolescente è irrequieta, con gli ormoni a palla, e pensa in continuazione. Durante questa sua disabilità si ritroverà anche ad affrontare il divorzio improvviso dei propri genitori ed i loro rispettivi amanti, che verranno presentati durante la sua degenza prima in ospedale e, successivamente, in un istituto.
Per quanto mi riguarda non avevo idea che fosse così vecchio come libro, addirittura 1983, e devo ammettere che ad attirarmi è stato prima di tutto il titolo e, successivamente, la trama. Che è semplice, nonostante d’effetto, ma a mio parere non è stata trattata come doveva esserlo..
Prima di tutto parto col precisare che non sopporto quando non creano degli spazi a sufficienza tra un discorso all’altro, ci sono dei salti temporali assurdi che non vengono nemmeno annunciato in anticipo, tutt’altro. Una persona legge del presente e, improvvisamente, nello stacco successivo di pochi centimetri si ritrova catapultato nel passato senza una logica.
Per quanto sia scritto in modo semplice e scorrevole, questo mi ha messa in confusione ed infastidito. Non dico che non lo consiglio, ma c’è assai di meglio.

[readbymonet · Rating 4 out of 5]

I started reading this novel a few years ago and could not get into it. I picked it up a few days ago and I was immediately enthralled. I believe my experience having chronic pain due to a car accident is what led me to instantly have empathy for Alice. The novel takes place entirely from her perspective and mostly, in a hospital bed. The journey of patient and “back to Alice” seems like it may never happen. The book takes us on a journey through the demise of her parent’s relationship as well as new interactions with her doctors. Alice is not shy about how she feels and what she wants. I admired her tenacity throughout the book, even under anesthesia she tried to yell at the staff and noted on how the anesthesiologist had dandruff. The moments of sadness and pain were often blanketed by wit, which I greatly appreciated and can relate to. I appreciate how accurate the book was written, in terms of medical terminology and the qualms of rehabilitation. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this book.

[Jenine · Rating 2 out of 5]

The realistic aspects left me wanting more info. But then there were plenty of Fictional things that had me grumbling. Why is Alice so beautiful? What do you mean bedsores that are then never mentioned again in the recovery process? What is up with the two invalid-molesting boyfriends?
I've loved her other novels that I've read.
Blurbed by Updike, pretty snazzy for a first novel.

[Gabriella · Rating 5 out of 5]

Lovely book

Although reading about a young woman's travails with a mysterious but debilitating illness sounds awful, this book is so beautifully written that I read it in a day (something I have rarely done). The story was engaging and poignant. Far from being maudlin, it was witty, shrewd, and engaging.

[Kelly · Rating 1 out of 5]

Had a hard time understanding or liking the characters. The relationship between Alice and her lover doctor seemed so off and bizarre in light of her physical ailments. I lost interest and didn’t finish the book because I didn’t want to invest more time in the book.

[Daphne · Rating 4 out of 5]

DO NOT read this before you have your hip replacement surgery! Wait six months, then you will laugh!

[Andrea Taylor · Rating 4 out of 5]

Review coming soon

[Elisa Vangelisti · Rating 1 out of 5]

senza capo nè coda

[Margery Osborne · Rating 3 out of 5]

this one was the only one hard for me

[Sarah · Rating 2 out of 5]

What a strange little book. I’m a bit mystified that people describe it as comic. I missed the comedic parts, I guess.

[Eva · Rating 3 out of 5]

read in a day but at the end it didn't satisfy me 100%

[Jennifer Webster · Rating 1 out of 5]

Not one of my favorite reads but the ending was ok. It had a hard time keeping my Interest

[Laura Gurrin · Rating 2 out of 5]

I don't exactly regret the time spent reading it, but it was like a car trip along a road not far from where you usually drive, to try a place you aren't sure you'll like. It's not terrible and you see a few new things, but nothing really interesting happens, and at the end it's fine but it probably would have been nicer to just stay home.

[Marco Kaye · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a funny book about being in the hospital, if you can believe it. The main character Alice is quick-witted, acerbic, and most of all pissed that something is wrong with her and none of her doctors knows what. Schine rounds out the cast of characters around her brilliantly, all of whom are quirky and hilarious.

90% of the book is spent with Alice as she lies prostrate in a hospital bed, wondering what the hell is wrong with her and why she can’t walk. If this sounds morbid, it isn’t. It’s a very funny book, as Shine has her way with portraying hospital life in a way that is so accurate. Luckily, I haven’t spent a lot of time in those sanitized hells, but I do remember the odd characters hanging about the hallways when I went to visit my grandparents. There was something both odd and very human about the “hospital crazies,” as if being in a compromised place like that brings out both the best and worst in a person.

We see the best and worst of Alice, but we’re laughing the whole time. At least I was. Looking forward to reading the next one in this series, called, awesomely, To the Birdhouse.

[Lily · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hilarious, a page turner. Alice Brody reminded me so much of Cécile from Bonjour Tristesse. A little wise, a little selfish, a little perverted, and a lot perceptive, Alice Brody comes down with a mysterious disease where her hips and legs are filled with excruciating pain such that she can't get out of bed for months. The book follows her in the hospital and rehab facility where she deals with unemotional nurses, lecherous doctors, and her imbecilic parents. She was really her own agent though, despite being bedridden and young. She takes it upon herself to seduce all kinds of men way too old for her, and has no patience for her relentlessly positive mother and unexcitable father. Even though she proclaims she is in love with these gross doctors, she still sees right through them for being lecherous hacks. I just loved this book, I thought it was so funny and fresh. The letters she writes to her friend Katie in a psychiatric ward were so unconcerned and blunt. Also, her family's whole 1970s assimilated-Jewish-Manhattan thing was really interesting.

[Sara Booklover · Rating 2 out of 5]

Questo libro me lo sono trascinato dietro per un po'... diciamo che preso a piccole dosi l'ho trovato abbastanza piacevole. La storia è molto statica e non ci si poteva aspettare di più con una protagonista confinata in un letto d'ospedale, ma diciamo che un po' di più il lettore se lo aspetta sempre, anche da un libro con una trama così. Idea originale, scrittura ironica a cinica, con scene pseudo-divertenti e grottesche che aiutano a stemperare un'atmosfera che altrimenti sarebbe stata abbastanza triste, ma il risultato è che il lettore non impara a conoscere davvero la protagonista e immedesimarsi in lei, quindi da questo punto di vista la storia risulta fredda e distante, nel complesso poco incisiva. Ripeto, può risultare un libro piacevole, soprattutto a chi piace questo stile di scrittura, ma io prediligo descrizioni più approfondite per quanto riguarda l'introspezione dei personaggi e quindi non è un libro che rientra nei miei gusti anche se ho letto di peggio.

[Katy · Rating 3 out of 5]

A little slow moving for my tastes. I suppose this could be construed as a SPOILER, but this is not really a book with a lot of mystery to figure out, but in case you don't want any part given away ahead of time, do not read any further...

I could not get over the part where she kept hooking up with the men her father or grandfather's age while she was in the hospital. It just (and I think this is the correct technical term) icked me out.

There were some parts that were very well written. All and all, if you find yourself in the airport trying to figure out a book that would perhaps not be a total waste to read, I'd put this book in that category. Beyond that, I can't say much.

[Jgknobler · Rating 3 out of 5]

I read yet another Cathleen Schine book, looking to capture the pleasure I had reading the Three Weissmanns of Westport, but once again no luck. The novel, written early in Schine's career, is about a young woman hospitalized and bedridden after a mysterious illness attacks her hips. I have no idea whether any of this is autobiographical.If so, I would have preferred a more straightforward memoir. Schine's funny and cynical voice is certainly there, but there is a disconnect between the story and the emotions the protagonist experienced--wouldn't she be terrified?--that makes the story feel like an unsatisfactory fable.

[Richard Kramer · Rating 5 out of 5]

This really delighted me. The voice that Cathleen Schine has established in her many subsequent novels -- elegant, haimische, thrillingly subtle (Alison Lurie compared her favorably to Jane Austen) and Borscht-Belt funny -- was/is all here in her first time out of the gate. Alice may be in bed, but bed for her is a kind of Wonderland, too, where she makes the passage into adulthood in a unique way that had me yellow hi-liting all over the place and turning occasionally green with envy, which is risky with my coloring. This feels like a book Schine had to write, and you'll feel lucky she did.

[Bettye]

A funny, quirky kind of book from the point of view of a young woman who has an illness. Her illness is difficult to diagnose and thus she is in the hospital for months. It sounds depressing but really isn't because the protagonist is witty and clever and eventually she does get better. The book makes you see life from the patient's point of view. People in the medical profession should read this book

[Marcia · Rating 3 out of 5]

The cover of my paperback is better than the one shown here (it has feet at the end of the bed...). This was a book recommended by the NY Times, a resissue of a novel written about 25 years ago by the author of The Three Wiessmanns of Westport. Even though I was reading it on an airplane, at first I thought it was silly, but it got better as I finished it: It is about a young woman who has a fairly unexplained paralyzing illness for about a year.

[Elizabeth · Rating 3 out of 5]

I picked this up in Santa Fe when I was there for a meeting because I had nothing to read. I was looking for a funny book and this seemed like a good choice. It is funny and interesting and well written but a bit bewildering. It is such a great set up with engaging characters but no one seems to develop. Nonetheless Schine's adept observations about hospitals, doctors, divorce, patients and families make this a delightful read.

[Jeanne · Rating 2 out of 5]

College sophomore Alice Brody is in bed, and she does not know why. The pain came on suddenly one night, and now the young woman cannot walk.

The first half of the novel covers Alice’s mystery illness (which is never fully explained) and focuses on her visitors—family, doctors, and other healers. The second half of the novel focuses on her recovery—a series of successful operations and her recuperation.

Strangely appealing.

[Susan · Rating 4 out of 5]

It's almost impossible to summarize this novel, which is a comic, sexy story about a young woman with a painful, undiagnosable disease. Alice is confined to a hospital bed for almost a year, and we meet her family, her mother's new boyfriend, her father's new life, doctors and nurses, fellow patients, all the rich mixture of life from which Alice feels excluded.

[Ed · Rating 2 out of 5]

Having spent a long time in a hospital bed I thought this autobiographical novel that promises to treat the subject with humor hit the spot. Unfortunately I found Schine's humor too broad and her protagonist uninteresting. I did enjoy the sections that reminded me of what it is like to depend on the kindness of strangers.

[Diane Drennan Pavia · Rating 2 out of 5]

I'm btwn 1 and 2 stars on this. I've liked other books by this author but I found these characters flat and uninteresting. I didn't always understand the relationships she was drawing btwn them, and then I realized I didn't really care. I only finished it b/c, as I said, I like this author and was hoping it would get better. It really didn't.