Oh lordy, I'd say everyone involved in these stories really needs to chill out and get laid, but they'd be so devastated with shock that I'll refrain. First, Michael Katz has done a very cool thing here: he's put together Lev Tolstoy's novella The Kreutzer Sonata with Tolstoy's wife Sofiya's direct response Whose Fault?, along with her Song without Words and their son's response Chopin's Prelude. Yes, this is a family who has its arguments via novellas, counter novellas, and pretty bad, but terribly sincere and earnest, short stories. There are also a number of letters, diary entries, etc. pertaining to the publication of The Kreutzer Sonata included in The Kreutzer Sonata Variations. In its era (the 1890s), Tolstoy's original novella was utterly scandalous, was banned from publication in Russia until Sofiya begged the Tsar personally to allow it to be published, banned in a couple of states in the US, and generally caused a real literary ruckus (and at least one young man to castrate himself). Having them all in one collection is inspired, and anyone interested in sex, crazy Christians, crazy Russians, really dysfunctional families, or the debate over attachment vs free-range parenting, etc. ought to read it.
That said....good grief! Tolstoy is a nut (please keep in mind that Anna Karenina is arguably the best novel ever written, and I loved it, and liked War and Peace well enough, so Tolstoy being a nut should be understood in the context of my general fandom). Allow me to sum up the various plots here. TKS: sleazebag lustmonkey of a man marries woman young enough not to know better, is a total asshole to her for a decade or so, then murders her because she dares hang out with a guy who doesn't treat her like shit. Whose Fault: sleazebag lustmonkey of a man marries a woman young enough not to know better who is ever so shocked by (the spiritual impurity of) sex; he's a total asshole to her for a decade or so, then murders her because she dares hang out with a guy who doesn't treat her like shit and makes her think, just maybe, that being touched by a guy who isn't a total prick might be ok (though still fundamentally something nice girls just don't do). Song without Words: Ridiculous woman (married to a lovely guy) suffering grief past the point of credibility at her mother's death becomes obsessed with the musical outpourings of gay composer, only to accidentally fall in love with him, go crazy at the inevitable fact he can't love her back, and sinks into madness. This novella is a bit of the odd man out here—the husband isn't a slime; he's really quite nice—but it makes sense in the context of the larger work and relationship of the Tolstoys. Sofiya suffered enormous grief at the death of a young son, and she argues in her reflections (also here) that she was saved by the music of a friend and her resulting passion for music—or, since this is the 19th century, should I say Passion? Lev Tolstoy was bitterly jealous of her relationship with the man, even though she swore up and down that she remained pure throughout (and purity, folks, it’s all about purity). Since jealousy and purity are the obsessive themes of both the primary novellas, it makes sense to include this one. Meanwhile, the son's short addition to the family battle over the evils of sex vis-à-vis the human (well, male) desire for this evil thing, has a plot involving a young poor man who decides that the only solution to being a moral person is to get married young—to avoid turning into an evil lustmonkey like the men in his parents' stories. Then he can have a good Christian marriage, only having sex to reproduce, and have a moral relationship with his equally young wife.
So here's the deal: Tolstoy really means to argue, and frankly, I think his Afterward is critical to understanding what he means to argue, that men are inherently lustmonkeys who simply will go to bordellos, f$#@ any woman who moves, etc., and women...oh, where do I begin with his view of women? The highest calling of a woman is to raise her children (fine and dandy; Sofiya makes a neat little argument for attachment parenting in her version), and clearly no good woman would ever, ever like sex...but to win and retain one of these lustmonkey men, a young woman has to compromise her purity and get all sexed up, then...god forbid...when she is married with children, in order to keep him from straying, which of course he will do because he just can't help himself, she may even need to (close your eyes here if you are easily shocked!) have sex with him even while pregnant or nursing a baby. Oh dear god, the immorality of that! Since sex cannot ever be imagined as anything other than morally wrong when it isn’t for procreation, and nice girls obviously hate sex, having sex while pregnant or nursing is clearly horrendous. The one thing worse is when a woman is driven to keep her lustmonkey…er, sorry, husband...by having sex but using birth control. And women like prostitutes who have sex with no commitment and using birth control? The only thing worse is the men who use them. Pretty much, the spiritual purity of a woman is compromised the minute she gets near one of these men, and man's lusty nature makes it very, very hard for him to be a good person.
Well, except Lev in TKS essentially sets the murder out as the woman's fault—a man's desperate need for sex means that he can’t help but ignore a woman’s actual personality and interests—when she talks, he’s way too busy imagining her naked to listen to what she says—and ultimately, the very existence and presence of women compromises a man’s only chance at a real spiritual existence. Women separate men from God, and cannot be forgiven for this evil (Tolstoy’s husband in TKS says that in the future we will lament that women were allowed out in public or to show any skin at all). Don't get me wrong—Tolstoy is f@#*$ng brilliant, and he's got bits in here that are just inspired. His comments on coming out balls; his description of the difficulty of marriage when the children are little, men constantly undressing women in their minds, etc. are so clever, it's amazing. There are nuggets of what appear to be truths about marriage that cross time and space.
But taken as a whole, this is crazy land. One might naively think, “but isn’t the solution to these marriages actually having people marry someone they actually love?” No, according to Tolstoy—love is just a pretty story women tell themselves and men lie about to get women in the sack. It’s not real.
Tolstoy was apparently quite the lusty gentleman, but he wanted to be pure and spiritual and strive for the model of Jesus. The whole kit and kaboodle here is about his quest to be a good Christian and to teach others how to be a good Christian. Ultimately, he concludes that the only solution to this whole dilemma of lustmonkey men and poor women spiritually compromised by a man’s lust and the need to keep him home is that no one ever has sex again. Yeah, really. That’s the solution. I'm not kidding. That was his conclusion.
Sex is inherently evil because it is inherently self-serving, not serving God, so if we want to model ourselves after Christ, we should just not do it. Ever again. If you are thinking, "but, wouldn't humanity die out if no one had sex..." Yeah, he got that. That was ok if everyone lived like Jesus because that was obviously the point of life. Purity. Everyone had to be pure. A good Christian must avoid sex, even procreative sex: if a couple has children, then they must focus on raising the children (or she must, and he must complain about it because it cuts into his ready access to sex), which is inherently self-directed, not focused on God, and thus impure. So there is no such thing as a Christian marriage unless, basically, you agree not to have sex and love each other as brother and sister.
Sofiya wrote her own novella to counter Tolstoy’s—arguing that the jerk of a husband was responsible for the wife finding companionship elsewhere (in neither novella had she actually had sex with the guy), but I'm not sure if the difference between their perspectives really makes a difference—she argues that she wanted to have her say after TKS humiliated her in public, but since everyone felt sorry for her after it was published, I don't think anyone was blaming her for the state of their marriage (since everyone assumed the book reflected it). Basically, though, she too seems to completely believe that nice girls don't like sex, and sees no way out of this problem. She says in her later reflections that no woman is remotely interested in sex when she has young children—it’s only in her 30s that she starts to be interested. These people need a sexual revolution, stat! Sex in her story, too, is something impure, something forced on an innocent girl who is only interested in art and poetry and a meaningful spiritual existence by a base and low man who has no appreciation for purity and all of that stuff.
Their son thinks he's taken the radical tack by disagreeing with his father that sex and marriage are always bad, but his solution is to marry as quickly as possible, so the inevitable desire of a man to stray will be tamed by having a wife as young as possible—saving him from all the bordellos and from the risk of meeting women who, god forbid, are base and low and might like sex themselves (which, of course, simply destroys whatever innocence might still exist in the man). He argues that procreation is a legitimate reason for sex after all, so Christian marriage is possible (not that sex is legitimate for other reasons).
Ok, so I had to rant. Tolstoy would argue vociferously that people just justify having sex because they want to, and they’ll justify their lusts anyway they can to get what they want, but we shouldn’t confuse that with doing the right thing: sex separates you from God; it is always self-centered, not God-centered, so man must fight his baser instincts constantly, and that means no sex. I confess, I’m not all that concerned with living a pure Christian life—I’m more concerned about the obnoxious murdering lout of a character treating his wife like crap and the implicit argument that men are so obsessed with sex that we really can’t expect anything else of them; I’m concerned with the good girls don’t like sex thing. I just can’t get around thinking that no matter how much he wants to dress this up as a route to spiritual purity and being a good Christian, it’s pretty much misogynistic balderdash. Thus endeth my rant.
But, like, you should totally read it.