Courage to Cure Codependency: Healthy Detachment Strategies to Overcome Jealousy in Relationships, Stop Controlling Others, Boost Your Self Esteem, and Be Codependent No More
Do you want to have the courage to trust yourself, speak up for yourself, say “no,” and enforce boundaries in your relationships?Do you find yourself always in the position of being a caretaker, sacrificing your own needs in favor of someone else’s, and taking on other people’s responsibilities and consequences? Have you ever been a people-pleaser, trapped by your own over commitments to come to the rescue of everyone around you, and work to ensure everyone else’s happiness but your own?If you have said yes to any of these questions, you may be exhibiting signs of codependency. While the term codependency came about to describe alcoholic behavior, codependency is not just for those suffering from substance abuse. And codependency can be present in all types of relationships--romantic, platonic, or with friends and family.Codependency comes in many forms and varying degrees of severity, but we’ve all been there at some point. Always trying to “fix” someone. Finding ourselves constantly attracting the same types of low-functioning people who are always in some sort of “crisis” and we’re always coming to their rescue. Having a hard time saying “no” when we know we should.Or maybe your relationship starts off great and you feel happy, but at some point you find yourself in a position where you get wrapped up in your partner’s life, and push aside your own goals, dreams, and habits. What seemed like healthy attachment has now turned into you basing your happiness on someone else’s and constantly seeking validation from outside yourself.Courage to Cure Codependency will help you avoid codependency at all stages of a relationship. It will help you eliminate codependency in a current relationship, heal from the ending of a codependent relationship, and prevent getting into a codependent relationship in the future. Even though you may be exhibiting codependent behavior, it is not who you are, and your best self is underneath the parts of you that are holding you back.In this book, you will to practice saying no and enforcing boundariesHow to reframe your thoughts to empower yourself and prevent future codependent behaviorSeven steps to heal from a codependent relationshipHow to reclaim your self-esteem and self-confidenceThe key things you must do in order to avoid getting back into another codependent relationshipHow to free yourself from guilt of refusing to continue to be an enabling caretakerHow to salvage a codependent relationship and turn it aroundHow to identify which type of codependent you areWhy your codependency isn’t your faultThe surprisingly innocent behavior you may have done as a child that is causing codependent behavior in adulthoodSneaky ways codependency shows up in relationships and the harmful codependent behaviors you may not realize you’re exhibitingAnd much more…You deserve to have healthy relationships.
I really wanted to like this book more, but I just can’t. I feel like this might have been a great start if it was the first book I read about codependency and was trying to figure out if that was my issue or not. But since this is my 3rd or 4th book on the topic, I didn’t find the first half of the book as useful as someone who might still be trying to figure out what their issue is. Don’t get me wrong, there is some very in depth info about figuring out if you are codependent and what form that usually takes in your actions. But if I hadn’t already known I was codependent, I probably wouldn’t have found this book in the first place.
When I finally got to the part where the book offers some advice, I found it to be a bit wishy-washy. “Give yourself time to heal” and “don’t do what you previously did” we’re not very helpful strategies for me personally. The steps are there, but there aren’t many suggested strategies to help you achieve those steps.
I would recommend as a quick read if you are trying to figure out what is going on in your life and if this is something that you should be seeking help with. But not as a guide to really get you through the process of healing
This helped me realise I didn’t completely understand exactly what codependency is; educating me on this was extremely beneficial.
I did find the author a little aggressive and forceful, though. Perhaps that’s what codependents need, a slap, but it was a little jarring for me and I found myself getting a little confused at points that were reiterated in a different context.
It’s left me needing to seek out more of a workbook format book to heal, as I feel I need a more detailed approach to recovering. This set me on the right path though.
This book was helpful in many ways and also made me feel called out. Here are the three things that I learned: 1. having a needy partner is not the same thing as you being wanted. 2. punishing yourself or your partners for mistakes, miscommunications or hurt is not helpful or productive. 3. Valuing yourself,your needs and your body are more important than any relationship 4. You cant make anyone stay and holding on too tight just makes you tired.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
I highlighted something on every single page. It was so hard to read because it’s so true and so painful to accept but for the first time in my life I’m not looking away and I’m committed to end codependent relationships so I can give myself everything I’ve ever dreamed of.