Fascinating Girl is a guide for young women on how to discover and cultivate their innate femininity, and how to start a relationship that will lead to a happy marriage. Before she passed away, Helen Andelin asked her eldest daughter, Dixie Andelin Forsyth, to update her work to reflect changes in culture and to help the book reach a broader international audience. Vintage Edition leans more on the essential and practical principles that made the original book so powerful. This edited publication is reflective of the wisdom that Helen Andelin gained over the years following her initial publishing and success; after countless hours in educational settings with her certified teachers and their students, through reader correspondences, from conversations with her daughters, and from her own private contemplation.
Helen Berry Andelin was the founder of the Fascinating Womanhood Movement, beginning with the women's marriage classes she taught in the early 1960s. Controversial among feminists for its advice toward women's fulfilling traditional marriage roles, her writings are still supported and re-discovered as recently as 2016, with classes still being taught online and in seminars.
This book, though old-fashioned in the way it presents relationships, is very insightful. I refer to it often though my first time reading it I was skeptical. It explains the steps of winning a man's heart well, I've used it's tactics. I still have my personality, and can stand up for myself, but around my man I now know how to comfort, get him to confide, and be his angelic beauty.
Sure, some may say it is fun to laugh at, but more often than not, it's because they don't trust it enough to apply what it teaches. You'll be amazed with the results if you put your whole heart into practicing these simple things and will be surprised at how charming you can be.
No one is forcing you to be submissive to all men. You can still be strong and independent, as long as your man still feels like he is needed. Other men don't matter.
My mother referred to this as her "Bible" in her teenage years, my parents are happily married, passionately in love, and have six children. Then she passed it on to me.
There are so many things I can say about this book, but I will stick with this. If you follow the advice in this book, you will be helping to set back women's lib about 200 years. This book is the complete opposite of what I tell my daughter, and is the reason we needed Gloria Steinhem.
It's fabulous for a good laugh, but this is not a book to be taken seriously. Pretending to be stupid and fragile and needing a man to take care of you because you are incapable of thinking for yourself is the worst advice I've ever heard. As is to not study things like science and math because they are man fields.
Plus, all of the examples of fascinating girls are fictional characters!
I read this as a teen. It was okay. Definitely old fashioned, to the point of being laughable at times. There is some good insight into the way men think, but I also don't believe all men are exactly the same, and this tends to generalize and put them all neatly in the same box. For example, I do not think all men are put off by strong minded, independent women. I think that the fact that men in the past have viewed themselves as superior to women was wrong and that is something men have had to change. I don't think I should behave in a way that stokes a man's ego so he can feel superior to me. I should be viewed as his equal in every way. A man that is threatened by this has ego issues. And the notion that deep down men dislike women who are overtly sexy is silly. I do think that men like for women to be sexy at times. However I do agree that men tend to lose respect for women who give them everything without a commitment.
I do think men are attracted to women that have many of the qualities this book promotes, but there is too much emphasis in this book on behaving certain ways to get a man to fall in love with you. While I think some of the advice is good, I also think we should just be ourselves. If a man can't love me for who I am, why would I want him?
This is what my wife's and my marriage is based on. I'm kidding. This is kind of a chauvinists approach to male and female relationships. Basically, this books says that women should be submissive and 100% obedient to their husbands and if anything bad ever happens the woman is to blame. This book was the guidebook for June Clever in the the "Leave it to Beaver" TV show from the 1950's. This is pretty humiliating reading for any female.
If we were rating this book on sheer entertainment value, I'd give it 5 stars. We read passages aloud at family gatherings to have a good laugh. Since it was written to be taken seriously, I have to rate it accordingly.
This is terrible, terrible, terrible. From the "real-life" examples (characters from novels) to the advice given (capable women - men won't like you unless you pretend to be dumb, etc.), this is so damaging. Read it for fun, not for enlightenment.
This book is great for single women, whether you are single by choice, death or divorce. I have learned alot about how to respond to a man when I meet them. There are many lessons a woman can learn and still be herself. I find it quite refreshing especially as I have re-entered the dating scene. It is quite fun to be an angel and a domestic goddess, most men love to be able to take care of a woman over having a very strong independent woman. I would have to agree with this as I have tried the experiments out and the results are tell taling.
Thanks for the book, sis! Ha, ha! Maybe I should rate this book a bit higher for its comedic benefits. When you read something that you know the author intended to be serious, but it is just a complete farce, how can you not laugh!? I cannot believe how many people have given this a good review! What is up with you people?
Of course I did not like or agree with this book, but I've found it enormously useful in helping my students understand the level and detail of gender discrimination women faced--and not that long ago.
I got this from my parents house from a junk pile. It was given to my mother in the 70's I believe when she converted to the LDS church. It is a hilarious self help book of how to be the perfect wife and mother. Obviously it is outdated and against the feminist movement.A wonderful piece for conversation. I remembered I had read this book when I recently read its contemporary " The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands"
I like this book, because it's full of positive thoughts. I think, every girl or woman will find something own in it. And, maybe, somebody will find nothing. It's written enough conservatively and also speaks about another mentality, than we have. But, most important, extract necessary information which you really need. And this book has a lot of useful information! I usually read this book, when I just want get some inspiration. I recommend it for all! Only women of course! ;)
My mother gave me this book and when I read it I was gob smacked. Basically be submissive to men and all will go well with the world. Then to prove her wrong I tried it, but then it worked!! How sad. What a sad commentary on men. Now I don't know what to think.
The author gives six steps on how to catch a good man. The first two-thirds of the book deal with the first step, how to be a worthy woman that is desirable of catching. The last of the book is the strategy: Finding good men, understanding men, building them up, and how to love them and thus be loved in return by them.
It's pretty solid, for the most part. I could find things that I disagreed with. But that would just be my nature. To be honest, I think it's a good book for girls to read, even if they aren't interested in marriage at this time because it does deal on a lot on just bettering yourself so that you are in general a kinder, better woman.
I will say though, that I don't think you need makeup to look nice (you can do other things for your complexion) and that there is nothing wrong with having friends that are inferior. Yes, they may not be the best strategy wise for socializing with men. My argument would is if you're truly a good woman and your light is shining, then you'll be friends with all the girls, and so you'll still be socializing with men even as you're focusing on the lesser girls.
Overall, a good read, worth the time. And it's always good to understand others better and not just say, "That's how men are" but be able to have compassion on them and love for them.
1.5/2.0 I read this book because a friend recommended it. It was written as a word against the feminist movement. There are parts I can endorse since I generally hold to tradition, but a lot of it I didn’t like.
For one, because I don’t think it’s my job as a woman to become__a whole list of things__to try to attract a man. And I don’t think that that should be my main focus.
Second, the writing is…unfortunate. It’s too cringy, the grammar is terrible, and though it quotes quite a bit from classical literature nothing is cited.
The fascinating girl? It’s a fascinating read, oddest book I ever read.
It's on the self shelf, as it's meant to be a self-help book. Mostly it provided fantastically nauseating information and made me want to count occurrences of the usage of "manly". There were some good points, but you have to get through many lessons on pretending to be a helpless and intellectual midget to get there. I will try to strip away the good points from the rest of it and mostly am just glad I'm done. I can't give one star for two reasons: 1) I agree with her on most of what she puts forward as moral ground that should not be compromised; 2) Much of it is so outrageous, I just laughed and laughed.
I loved it! I study and read anything on the Divine Feminine and feel that the “feminists” that rate this book low, truly don’t understand the real gift and power of being a female. We are full of magic and charm and I appreciated this read teaching me things my Mother never knew to teach me. I also enjoy a more deeper and passionate relationship for it. I love the beauty of the feminine and masculine energies and the gifts they offer when we are in our authentic role.
so bad. so so so so bad. whats an unfascinating sad teenage girl to do when its summer and there is nothing else in a low reading range or interest even if walking to the library meant good summer exercise. yes that is about the only reason I read it. However I will never again see Dickens' novels in quite the same literary light as many others do. So, at least, it did do that.
So THAT'S why it took me until my 40s to get married! I am the total opposite of what this book suggests a woman should be. It is a very silly book, it is an extremely old fashioned book, but... (and the rampant feminists will hate me), I think there is a lot of truth in this book. I hate that this is the case, but there it is.
Just finished this interesting read. Definitely fixed in time from about 45 years ago. Modern attitudes would find the recommendations in the book patronising and degrading to women. As a man I can recognise how the recommendations would be attractive to men, but I can also understand why women should not be forced to act that way today. Well worth reading to see how values have changed. If you are a women by all means try the tips in the book but understand that is your free choice and not a necessity to secure the right man.
This is a very interesting book. My biggest criticism is the many typos. But feminine appeal is, in my opinion, a VERY neglected topic in many conservative and religious circles, to the detriment of good matches we hope to see young people ultimately make. One of the most natural things in the world (a girl’s desire to be lovely and get to know young men) becomes taboo, and the most desirable matches become somehow “off-limits” because no one wants to touch this important topic and we tend to make our young people unapproachable and send them into the treacherous dating landscape without any skills or tools and then blindly hope for the best. This leaves girls (and boys in their own ways) ripe to be influenced by the shocking aspects of popular culture that is always in their faces, but is not achievable, or healthy, which leaves them at risk for setting the stage for a less ideal attention and attracting a mate that doesn’t see her true value. This book digs into so many of the finer practical points of being winsome (not just physically attractive) in ways that are honorable and bring out the best in everyone who might come into a girl’s presence, and developing a romantic relationship in a healthy way. I don’t agree with every last thing, but no major red flags here, and I wish there were more solid resources like this to counteract the way the culture sexualizes women. Some topics can be difficult for mom and teen daughters to dive into for risk of girl feeling targeted or mom coming across as critical, but a good book can take those personal feelings out and bridge the gap for some good conversations. These are conversations that we NEED to have with our daughters, because they are already getting messages about these topics every day from other sources that aren’t realistic.
The Fascinating Girl is Helen Andelin’s lesser-known tome. (She became famous in the early 1970s for Fascinating Womanhood, which I have not read). In this book, her focus is not on how a wife can keep her husband’s attention and affection, but rather, how a single girl can eventually win the man of her choice . The thread running all through the book is the two loves of Charles Dickens’s David Copperfield, whom Andelin uses to illustrate her premise about how a woman should strive to become a balance of Dora and Agnes to attract the man of her choice. Andelin’s ideas was that David was deeply in love with Dora, who, though too childlike and simple-minded to be a suitable wife, was beautiful and hyper-feminine enough to fascinate him. Agnes was also beautiful, but much more bright and competent, and therefore not as alluring, but ultimately the mate David truly needed. The rest of the book concentrates on how women should become a “fascinating” combination of the, well, sex goddess, and the efficient companion and friend. There might be a kernel of truth in what she says, but in this day and age, this philosophy of initially attracting a man by acting like a helpless simpleton just isn’t fascinating anymore. I do hope this book has been more or less shelved as a period relic.
I read this when I was a young teen. The author goes on and on about how men want a woman who is morally upright and yet also childlike and playful. To prove her point, she quotes extensively from David Copperfield, using Agnes and Dora as examples of each half of the perfect woman. When I got a little older, I actually read DC and was stunned to find it was fiction. Also, (spoiler), David was happy with the mature Agnes, NOT with the idiotic -- excuse me, childlike -- Dora. Not that it matters, since the story is made up and not some authoritative case study for Andelin to use to make her ridiculous argument about what men want.
In short, this book is utter crap, but good for a laugh. Shocking that something this stupid was taken seriously as late as the 1970s.
So refreshing to hear opinions like the ones voiced in this book. The world's so modern that it seems the more traditional ideas are almost completely discounted. But from reading this book I've felt they're not. If many others enjoy this book I know I'm not silly for looking to a future of being a wife and a mother. Not only is it a good thing but it is a great thing for any woman to do and that's what I'll take away from this book. It's given me the pick me up I needed and the confidence to go forward living by feminine virtues. I know now that this is how I should have always been living my life. Really great read. Something I would never hear in real life, so I'm glad I took the bait and read this book.