I Have Not Decided If You Can Drown On A Plane

by a hutzler

a poetry chapbook based on a plane ride and the month afterward where i spent the days trying to forget about an idea. originally written in 2013.

23 pages, Kindle Edition

Published July 25, 2018

Reviews

[Nathaniel · Rating 5 out of 5]

An excellent little collection

[Rebecca L. · Rating 5 out of 5]

I stumbled across Hutzler’s work in the blogosphere and I was intrigued when I found out that she was a fellow Filipina. I was raised in the United States and never had the opportunity to get to know the Filipino side of my family. Therefore, I’m always on the lookout for books that might be able to help me to connect to my people and my culture.

The author employs the skillful use of language to draw the reader into her mindset. Her writing resonates with longing and determination. There were points in this collection when I felt as if I were on the airplane with her, bracing myself for a crash landing.

I lost my breath entirely when I came to the piece entitled, “Mahal Kita Was Not the First Phrase I Learned.” As I mentioned, I have a very limited connection to my Filipino roots. When I stumbled across the phrase, “Mahal Kita,” in Hutzler’s book, I stopped short. (Note: “Mahal Kita,” is Tagalog for “I love you.”)

It took my breath away because, while that was not the first phrase that the author learned in Tagalog (hence, the title of the poem) it WAS the first phrase that I learned in my father’s language. Furthermore, it brought tears to my eyes to realize that this was the first time I had ever seen Tagalog printed in a book.

Diverse representation is SO important. A huge part of the reason that we write poetry or read books is because, as human beings, we want to find others like ourselves. It is not good for humans to be alone.

In short, reading Hutzler’s work made me feel less alone. It made me feel seen and acknowledged.
The construction of the poems is tight and clever. I read many of the pieces multiple times because not only were they beautiful, but I wanted to plumb the deeper meaning lying just below the surface of the clear water of her words.

I know that the author wrote this book five years ago. I was so impressed by her work, that I sought out her website (California Pollution) because I was curious to see how her writing had developed over the years. After perusing her website, it looks as if the author’s writing has continued to improve over the last five years. It is my sincere hope that she produces another chapbook in the near future.

I recommend this book for anyone who enjoys reading diverse voices, loves poetry, or has ever had a broken heart.

(*Trigger warning: This chapbook, while a beautiful work of art, does include strong language and some adult situations. There is also allusion to disordered eating)