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Is It Over Yet?
Rhys Powell and Derek Scott are divorcing. Mistakes have been made, lines have been crossed, and there’s no going back. Both men are exhausted and ready to move on. But their daughter is getting married soon. In the name of not putting a damper on her wedding, Derek and Rhys agree to keep the divorce on the down-low and show up as the happy couple everyone still believes they are. And between a roller coaster of a road trip and the love and joy surrounding the wedding… Derek and Rhys just might remember why they fell for each other in the first place. Are they only kidding themselves? Or can a rekindled spark really light the way to forgiveness? This novel is approximately 59,500 words long.
297 pages, Kindle Edition
First published January 8, 2019
110 people are currently reading
657 people want to read
About the author
L.A. Witt
218 books2,722 followersL.A. Witt and her husband have been exiled from Spain and sent to live in Maine because rhymes are fun. She now divides her time between writing, assuring people she is aware that Maine is cold, wondering where to put her next tattoo, and trying to reason with a surly Maine coon. Rumor has it her arch nemesis, Lauren Gallagher, is also somewhere in the wilds of New England, which is why L.A. is also spending a portion of her time training a team of spec ops lobsters.
Authors Ann Gallagher and Lori A. Witt have been asked to assist in lobster training, but they "have books to write" and "need to focus on our careers" and "don't you think this rivalry has gotten a little out of hand?" They're probably just helping Lauren raise her army of squirrels trained to ride moose into battle.
Visit her website at http://www.gallagherwitt.com/.
Authors Ann Gallagher and Lori A. Witt have been asked to assist in lobster training, but they "have books to write" and "need to focus on our careers" and "don't you think this rivalry has gotten a little out of hand?" They're probably just helping Lauren raise her army of squirrels trained to ride moose into battle.
Visit her website at http://www.gallagherwitt.com/.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 216 reviews
August 20, 2023
Re-read 3/23: Rating rounded up. Enjoyed it even more this time around, with less niggles. 😉
Original review:
3.5 stars
This story had a promising start. I liked the characters, the situation they found themselves in seemed realistic and I was curious to see how they would deal with what happened. I think it had a potential to be a great story about hurt, healing and giving a relationship a second chance, but it was a bit ruined for me once the MCs started their car trip to their daughter's wedding.
The rest of the story was more believable and, although everything was resolved a bit abruptly, I enjoyed it.
I loved Michael Ferraiuolo's narration of this story. Many reviewers say that there are too many inner monologues in the story and not enough dialogues, but listening to his narration I haven't even noticed. 😀
Original review:
3.5 stars
This story had a promising start. I liked the characters, the situation they found themselves in seemed realistic and I was curious to see how they would deal with what happened. I think it had a potential to be a great story about hurt, healing and giving a relationship a second chance, but it was a bit ruined for me once the MCs started their car trip to their daughter's wedding.
The rest of the story was more believable and, although everything was resolved a bit abruptly, I enjoyed it.
I loved Michael Ferraiuolo's narration of this story. Many reviewers say that there are too many inner monologues in the story and not enough dialogues, but listening to his narration I haven't even noticed. 😀
January 13, 2019
Didn't work for me. Sorry, but too much internal musings. Not enough dialogue. I didn't like being told about the MCs working on their relationship, I wanted to read about. I wanted to get sucked into their struggle. Overall, it was an anticlimactic read.
Thank you, Christine, for the buddy read and allowing me to vent. :) xo
Thank you, Christine, for the buddy read and allowing me to vent. :) xo
April 1, 2023
4**** stars
I looooove the troubled-relationship trope. And man… this one was troubled. One husband, Rys, really fucked up and caused a lot of hurt for both himself and his husband Derek.
After months of avoiding each other after the breakup (but still living in the same house), a road trip and their daughter’s wedding brings everything up on the table; family involved —tears and regret and them still being in love with each other, maybe there is a chance to come back from that.
We don’t get a lot of background on what happened exactly or what caused Rys to step out on their marriage. What we get tho, are two adult men who are hurting, trying to sort it out and deal with it. And it was a hot journey, too. *melt
Michael Ferraiuolo did a fine job with narrating the audio.
*** TW: cheating (off-page, prior to the story's beginning)
I looooove the troubled-relationship trope. And man… this one was troubled. One husband, Rys, really fucked up and caused a lot of hurt for both himself and his husband Derek.
After months of avoiding each other after the breakup (but still living in the same house), a road trip and their daughter’s wedding brings everything up on the table; family involved —tears and regret and them still being in love with each other, maybe there is a chance to come back from that.
Yeah, he’d fucked up. But look at the woman he, Sara, and I had raised. Look at the life we’d made together—a home, careers, friends. For the past few months, thinking about that made me want to lash out at him and demand to know why he was willing to throw it all away over one night of sex with a stranger. Today I couldn’t help but ask myself the same thing.
We don’t get a lot of background on what happened exactly or what caused Rys to step out on their marriage. What we get tho, are two adult men who are hurting, trying to sort it out and deal with it. And it was a hot journey, too. *melt
Michael Ferraiuolo did a fine job with narrating the audio.
*** TW: cheating (off-page, prior to the story's beginning)
dnf
May 29, 2019Too too too too too many words. This needs to be pared down by about 2/3. It's just a bloated mass of filler. Unfocused, verbose, lacking in emotional intensity. DNF @30%.
January 6, 2019
That was different, a romance in which the majority of the book is spent with the two MCs separated and contemplating divorce.
The reason for the divorce was down to one MC being unfaithful on a single occasion while suffering from a period of extreme doubt and possibly depression and while the marriage was floundering.
There are no excuses given for the cheating, no attempt to justify it, just an honest admission of guilt immediately after the fact which led to the point where the story begins.
The cheating has happened well before the book starts and there is no detail given regarding it other than that it happened, so people don't need to be concerned too much.
Even though this is a romance, I have to say I wasn't 100% sure there would even be a reunion - and a new happy ever after - but this author is supremely talented at taking the reader, and the narrative, where it needs to go to achieve that aim.
I won't go into the how's, it's best to be read blind with no preconceived ideas, but I will state I firmly believed in their journey back to forgiveness and a new beginning.
#ARC kindly received from the author in return for an honest and unbiased review.
The reason for the divorce was down to one MC being unfaithful on a single occasion while suffering from a period of extreme doubt and possibly depression and while the marriage was floundering.
There are no excuses given for the cheating, no attempt to justify it, just an honest admission of guilt immediately after the fact which led to the point where the story begins.
The cheating has happened well before the book starts and there is no detail given regarding it other than that it happened, so people don't need to be concerned too much.
Even though this is a romance, I have to say I wasn't 100% sure there would even be a reunion - and a new happy ever after - but this author is supremely talented at taking the reader, and the narrative, where it needs to go to achieve that aim.
I won't go into the how's, it's best to be read blind with no preconceived ideas, but I will state I firmly believed in their journey back to forgiveness and a new beginning.
#ARC kindly received from the author in return for an honest and unbiased review.
November 27, 2019
Let me rant for a minute.
Whenever someone’s argument regarding cheating is “it was a mistake, it was one time” I immediately judge their character to be an absolute waste of my time.
Cheating is a choice not a mistake.
Doesn’t matter if it’s one time or one hundred. Your anger and feeling of betrayal is valid. Let no one reduce your legitimate anger to being overdramatic.
Also: when you discover your partner betrayed you, have that self respect to not demean your own worth by doing to someone else what was done to you.
And then the whole bit of forgiveness centering on the “depends if it was just once” LIKE ARE YOU FUCKING FOR REAL?
/end rant
So, all this was pretty quick to be said in the book. Yes, I abhor cheating in real life and in my reading. However, I gave this one a go as I like L.A. Witt’s writing.
But yo, I just raged throughout this entire book. The whole pretending thing. The whole “why are you mad if it was just one time. It wasn’t like it was an affair” bullshit.
🙄
Also, if drinking to the point of getting wasted has you end up in someone else’s bed that isn’t your spouse, then homie, we don’t need to be talking let alone fucking. And the fact that these two still ended up in each other’s beds (AFTER DRINKING) even when that’s exactly what caused one of them to forget his ass was married. Then, at that point y’all deserve each other.
Whenever someone’s argument regarding cheating is “it was a mistake, it was one time” I immediately judge their character to be an absolute waste of my time.
Cheating is a choice not a mistake.
Doesn’t matter if it’s one time or one hundred. Your anger and feeling of betrayal is valid. Let no one reduce your legitimate anger to being overdramatic.
Also: when you discover your partner betrayed you, have that self respect to not demean your own worth by doing to someone else what was done to you.
And then the whole bit of forgiveness centering on the “depends if it was just once” LIKE ARE YOU FUCKING FOR REAL?
/end rant
So, all this was pretty quick to be said in the book. Yes, I abhor cheating in real life and in my reading. However, I gave this one a go as I like L.A. Witt’s writing.
But yo, I just raged throughout this entire book. The whole pretending thing. The whole “why are you mad if it was just one time. It wasn’t like it was an affair” bullshit.
🙄
Also, if drinking to the point of getting wasted has you end up in someone else’s bed that isn’t your spouse, then homie, we don’t need to be talking let alone fucking. And the fact that these two still ended up in each other’s beds (AFTER DRINKING) even when that’s exactly what caused one of them to forget his ass was married. Then, at that point y’all deserve each other.
April 12, 2023
If you are the type of person who thinks all cheaters are assholes, maybe this isn’t for you. Or maybe it is? Because maybe, sometimes, there are no assholes. Just humans. Imperfect humans. Who make mistakes, and then crumble under the pain, realizing what they did.
Marriages are hard work. They are supposed to last forever. Forever is a long time, definitely long enough to doubt. To fuck up. To hurt each other. To think it’s over. To wonder if you’ll ever get through this.
I don’t know what I would do if I were Derek. Or if I were Rhys. I just know that I would be devastated.
I cried. A lot. I smiled a little through my tears. And I cried again.
4.5 ⭐️
Marriages are hard work. They are supposed to last forever. Forever is a long time, definitely long enough to doubt. To fuck up. To hurt each other. To think it’s over. To wonder if you’ll ever get through this.
I don’t know what I would do if I were Derek. Or if I were Rhys. I just know that I would be devastated.
I cried. A lot. I smiled a little through my tears. And I cried again.
4.5 ⭐️
January 18, 2019
Important supplies for reading L.A. Witt’s Is It Over Yet?: tissues, wine, and a cozy reading spot. Though maybe not in that order. There’s a ton of emotion running through this one and it’s not an easy book to read. The bitter resentment, the overwhelming anger, and the heartbreaking regret set the tone through the entire story. So if you’re looking for an early reprieve, you’re not going to get it.
Is It Over Yet? is an intimate exploration inside two guys’ heads as they navigate their separation. Forced into close quarters on a road trip to their daughter’s wedding, too much time together has made them raw. Alternating between mourning the life they’ve lost, nursing overwhelming feelings of betrayal and regret, and resignation of their imminent divorce, the power of their emotions is overwhelming.
I can’t imagine anyone hasn’t been touched by divorce at some point, and growing up with divorced parents this book brings so many memories to the surface. I appreciate the way L.A. Witt handles this couple’s separation by exploring in depth how it affects everyone around them. From co-workers to extended family, and most especially to their daughter. Seeing how she reacts to her folks’ distress as she embarks on her own marriage, and contemplates making that commitment, is intense.
I would like to have learned more about what led to Rhys’ decision to cheat. Other than they were having problems and Rhys was “‘going through a rough patch’” of his own, Rhys says he didn’t feel close enough to Derek to talk to him about it. I wonder what aspects of Derek’s personality kept Rhys away and I wish I’d seen more of that side of him. As a veteran of three combat tours and a sufferer of PTSD, we only get glimpses of how that affects Derek. This is an interesting part of the story and a good clue to why their relationship failed in the first place.
Is It Over Yet? is incredibly emotional, both the highs and the lows, and I found it very cathartic. While there are some moments to smile over (and thankfully L.A. Witt’s dependably erotic sex scenes) most of this story is very sad. Very well written, this is definitely a journey worth taking, but refer back to my prescribed accouterments to help get you through it.
Is It Over Yet? is an intimate exploration inside two guys’ heads as they navigate their separation. Forced into close quarters on a road trip to their daughter’s wedding, too much time together has made them raw. Alternating between mourning the life they’ve lost, nursing overwhelming feelings of betrayal and regret, and resignation of their imminent divorce, the power of their emotions is overwhelming.
I can’t imagine anyone hasn’t been touched by divorce at some point, and growing up with divorced parents this book brings so many memories to the surface. I appreciate the way L.A. Witt handles this couple’s separation by exploring in depth how it affects everyone around them. From co-workers to extended family, and most especially to their daughter. Seeing how she reacts to her folks’ distress as she embarks on her own marriage, and contemplates making that commitment, is intense.
I would like to have learned more about what led to Rhys’ decision to cheat. Other than they were having problems and Rhys was “‘going through a rough patch’” of his own, Rhys says he didn’t feel close enough to Derek to talk to him about it. I wonder what aspects of Derek’s personality kept Rhys away and I wish I’d seen more of that side of him. As a veteran of three combat tours and a sufferer of PTSD, we only get glimpses of how that affects Derek. This is an interesting part of the story and a good clue to why their relationship failed in the first place.
Is It Over Yet? is incredibly emotional, both the highs and the lows, and I found it very cathartic. While there are some moments to smile over (and thankfully L.A. Witt’s dependably erotic sex scenes) most of this story is very sad. Very well written, this is definitely a journey worth taking, but refer back to my prescribed accouterments to help get you through it.
January 15, 2019
*3.5 stars*
I wanted to read this book because I love relationship angst, even more so in established relationships. I have read and LOVED L.A.Witt’s The Distance Between Us and this book definitely moves along these lines.
This is definitely not going to be for everyone because cheating. The MC might have cheated once and confessed immediately, but there is no way around it. It was blatant cheating and if this is a very hard limit for you, then, Is It Over Yet? might not work out. For me cheating is a hard limit in real life but in fiction, if handled well, it creates all this dramatic tension that I love.
Plot-wise, there is not much happening here. Rhys and Derek are getting a divorce but first they have to survive a road trip and their daughter’s wedding. They fight, they spend hours in awkward silence or try to stay away from each other’s way. Rhys keeps beating himself up for what he did, and Derek keeps trying to “punish” him. I love that shit. This kind of relationship angst never bores me.
I do have niggles, though, like the why. Rhys and Derek were very much in love. I needed much more explanation and background about what led Rhys to this moment of weakness. What he told Derek (months after the incident!) weren’t nearly enough for me. I would have liked more talk instead of all these inner monologues.
Derek’s decision to give Rhys another chance felt too abrupt but honestly the last part of the book was so emotional, with all those feels and hope and heartbreak and, above everything else, love, that I forgot everything else.
The epilogue was exactly what it should be: not perfect. It convinced me that Rhys and Derek were really going to make things work because despite everything they were communicating their fears instead of pretending everything was peach perfect.
I wanted to read this book because I love relationship angst, even more so in established relationships. I have read and LOVED L.A.Witt’s The Distance Between Us and this book definitely moves along these lines.
This is definitely not going to be for everyone because cheating. The MC might have cheated once and confessed immediately, but there is no way around it. It was blatant cheating and if this is a very hard limit for you, then, Is It Over Yet? might not work out. For me cheating is a hard limit in real life but in fiction, if handled well, it creates all this dramatic tension that I love.
Plot-wise, there is not much happening here. Rhys and Derek are getting a divorce but first they have to survive a road trip and their daughter’s wedding. They fight, they spend hours in awkward silence or try to stay away from each other’s way. Rhys keeps beating himself up for what he did, and Derek keeps trying to “punish” him. I love that shit. This kind of relationship angst never bores me.
I do have niggles, though, like the why. Rhys and Derek were very much in love. I needed much more explanation and background about what led Rhys to this moment of weakness. What he told Derek (months after the incident!) weren’t nearly enough for me. I would have liked more talk instead of all these inner monologues.
Derek’s decision to give Rhys another chance felt too abrupt but honestly the last part of the book was so emotional, with all those feels and hope and heartbreak and, above everything else, love, that I forgot everything else.
The epilogue was exactly what it should be: not perfect. It convinced me that Rhys and Derek were really going to make things work because despite everything they were communicating their fears instead of pretending everything was peach perfect.
January 11, 2019
This was done well, and I'm glad I read it. The emotions were heightened because of the cheating-aftermath-premise, and they stayed heightened the whole time.
There were a few things that niggled though - Derek's about-face wasn't as smooth as it could've been, there were times the book got preachy about different issues, and the initial sex scene felt awkward, like it didn't feel right in their situation.
Other things I noticed, but didn't really niggle: Derek is the name of a previous Witt MC. There are enough names in the world that there didn't need to be a repeat. "Derek" will always belong with Elliott in Changing Plans.
The trademark Witt phrases were present and accounted for:
"You better believe it", "Like that?" (during sex), and "I like the way you think"
They always pull me out of her stories because they repeat in so many of her books.
There were a few things that niggled though - Derek's about-face wasn't as smooth as it could've been, there were times the book got preachy about different issues, and the initial sex scene felt awkward, like it didn't feel right in their situation.
Other things I noticed, but didn't really niggle: Derek is the name of a previous Witt MC. There are enough names in the world that there didn't need to be a repeat. "Derek" will always belong with Elliott in Changing Plans.
The trademark Witt phrases were present and accounted for:
"You better believe it", "Like that?" (during sex), and "I like the way you think"
They always pull me out of her stories because they repeat in so many of her books.
January 9, 2019
4 emotional stars
I don’t know why I’m crying! Must be the good writing. It broke my heart to see these two men navigate a once-in-a-lifetime mistake. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I don’t tolerate cheaters but this story just kind of brought to light that not all cheaters are awful people. I mean, it doesn’t mean actions don’t have consequences. And while I don’t know if I’ll ever fathom why someone would cheat, I think it’s fair to say people are humans. And humans aren’t perfect. Which means people make mistakes, even if they chose to ignore the consequences at that point in time.
Anyways, enough philosophical ramblings. This was well written. Although plot wise, I still don’t get why Rhys cheated. And it’s great that we don’t have to read the cheating in action. I was just a tad bit annoyed that both Derek and Rhys seemed to be hashing and rehashing the same things over and over again. Logically I get that it’s normal and people do it way more often IRL. But...guess I expected fictional characters to be less annoying about things like that? 🤷🏻♀️
So, 4 stars. Very angsty. Expect your heart to break. And keep your hanky on hand. You’re definitely going to cry! 😭
I don’t know why I’m crying! Must be the good writing. It broke my heart to see these two men navigate a once-in-a-lifetime mistake. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I don’t tolerate cheaters but this story just kind of brought to light that not all cheaters are awful people. I mean, it doesn’t mean actions don’t have consequences. And while I don’t know if I’ll ever fathom why someone would cheat, I think it’s fair to say people are humans. And humans aren’t perfect. Which means people make mistakes, even if they chose to ignore the consequences at that point in time.
Anyways, enough philosophical ramblings. This was well written. Although plot wise, I still don’t get why Rhys cheated. And it’s great that we don’t have to read the cheating in action. I was just a tad bit annoyed that both Derek and Rhys seemed to be hashing and rehashing the same things over and over again. Logically I get that it’s normal and people do it way more often IRL. But...guess I expected fictional characters to be less annoying about things like that? 🤷🏻♀️
So, 4 stars. Very angsty. Expect your heart to break. And keep your hanky on hand. You’re definitely going to cry! 😭
August 14, 2021
* 4.5 stars *
I've had this book in my virtual library for a few years now, but I was shying away from reading it until now.
The story I got in the end isn't the story that I thought I was getting, it was so much better!
I was expecting an angst-filled story that would be diffcult for me to get to the end and where I'd have a problem liking the MCs. (That's the reason I was "afraid" to pick it up in the first place.) What I got though, even though it had its fair share of angst, it was an easy, interesting read. It didn't make me anxious or angry. I was sad for the situation the MCs where in and I could see how much they were both hurting, but I was genuinelly rooting for Derek and Rhys to figure things out and find their way back to each other.
This story is, first and foremost, a love story. It's a second chance romance and the journey of two people who love each other very much, but lost their path somewhere along the way. They're hurt, they feel betrayed, they're angry, they made mistakes, they have regrets.
But, above everything, they love each other deeply and genuinely.
I've had this book in my virtual library for a few years now, but I was shying away from reading it until now.
The story I got in the end isn't the story that I thought I was getting, it was so much better!
I was expecting an angst-filled story that would be diffcult for me to get to the end and where I'd have a problem liking the MCs. (That's the reason I was "afraid" to pick it up in the first place.) What I got though, even though it had its fair share of angst, it was an easy, interesting read. It didn't make me anxious or angry. I was sad for the situation the MCs where in and I could see how much they were both hurting, but I was genuinelly rooting for Derek and Rhys to figure things out and find their way back to each other.
This story is, first and foremost, a love story. It's a second chance romance and the journey of two people who love each other very much, but lost their path somewhere along the way. They're hurt, they feel betrayed, they're angry, they made mistakes, they have regrets.
But, above everything, they love each other deeply and genuinely.
January 10, 2019
Ohh this was beautiful and sad and emotional... I cried way too much...
April 9, 2025
yeah so, i have beef with this book. first of all, the tropes are marriage in trouble / second chance, which would call for some good groveling, right? apparently not because the book starts with the two MCs already in agreeance that they will get a divorce, so right off the bat, missed opportunity for some excellent groveling. kinda annoying, but i digress.
anywho, we find out that rhys cheated on derek, and derek proceeded to cheat on him back as revenge (go off, i guess). mind you, rhys never explicitly stated why he cheated. to me, it sounded like everything was perfect between him and derek and he became bored, so he got drunk and slept with someone else. idk i feel like the author could’ve cooked up something better during the brainstorm/drafting process. i was as unsatisfied as derek was when rhys “explained” his reasoning. if i were derek, i wouldn’t have forgave him, especially if he couldn’t give a clear answer.
i will say that they were both in the wrong. derek shouldn’t have gone out and cheated back, but to an extent, i do understand. it made his character more realistic as many people will act on emotional impulses when they’ve been betrayed by someone they love. it’s obvious that he was emotional in the moment and wanted to hurt rhys as much as rhys hurt him. however, i do wish that he had apologized towards the end as well. If they were still together at the time, then obviously his actions were just as bad as rhys’.
the one star is strictly for michael ferraiuolo. i like his voice, so it was nice that he was the narrator. other than that, everything and everyone else was trash.
anywho, we find out that rhys cheated on derek, and derek proceeded to cheat on him back as revenge (go off, i guess). mind you, rhys never explicitly stated why he cheated. to me, it sounded like everything was perfect between him and derek and he became bored, so he got drunk and slept with someone else. idk i feel like the author could’ve cooked up something better during the brainstorm/drafting process. i was as unsatisfied as derek was when rhys “explained” his reasoning. if i were derek, i wouldn’t have forgave him, especially if he couldn’t give a clear answer.
i will say that they were both in the wrong. derek shouldn’t have gone out and cheated back, but to an extent, i do understand. it made his character more realistic as many people will act on emotional impulses when they’ve been betrayed by someone they love. it’s obvious that he was emotional in the moment and wanted to hurt rhys as much as rhys hurt him. however, i do wish that he had apologized towards the end as well. If they were still together at the time, then obviously his actions were just as bad as rhys’.
the one star is strictly for michael ferraiuolo. i like his voice, so it was nice that he was the narrator. other than that, everything and everyone else was trash.
January 18, 2019
I *kinda* knew what I was getting into with this one...but...for the love of Pete, it was infuriating!
Rhys and Derek are in the process of splitting up.
We know this going in...and it's the hope that they move forward together instead of going separate paths. But..oh my shit! The drama of the anger/resentment/guilt/helplessness was over the top.
I wanted them to find their way.
I wanted one of them to grovel.
But I wanted them to...move forward!
And the majority of this book is stagnant...they were stuck therefore WE were stuck.
I found myself asking, Is it over yet?
*2.5 make-it-stop stars*
Rhys and Derek are in the process of splitting up.
We know this going in...and it's the hope that they move forward together instead of going separate paths. But..oh my shit! The drama of the anger/resentment/guilt/helplessness was over the top.
I wanted them to find their way.
I wanted one of them to grovel.
But I wanted them to...move forward!
And the majority of this book is stagnant...they were stuck therefore WE were stuck.
I found myself asking, Is it over yet?
*2.5 make-it-stop stars*
January 8, 2019
A Joyfully Jay review.
4 stars
I’m not sure what my expectations were for this story, but I like that Witt includes some pretty tried-and-true tropes (road trip, broken relationship, kids) and works them a bit differently than expected. The road trip, for example, starts out like a promising way for our two MCs to patch things up. Rhys and Derek go so far as to be able to share the same space and physical intimacy without too much trouble, courtesy of a little alcohol. The broken relationship is a star feature of the story. We start with a clear picture of just how deep the hurt goes from page one and it continues from there (until Rhys’ idea to just stop being so actively miserable works temporarily…then it’s right back to Misery Town, population two). Their daughter is the catalyst for the road trip and, of course, their happy husbands routine doesn’t work quite as they planned—the daughter is also the deus ex machina that lets this story have a happy-for-now-ish ending.
Read Camille’s review in its entirety here.
4 stars
I’m not sure what my expectations were for this story, but I like that Witt includes some pretty tried-and-true tropes (road trip, broken relationship, kids) and works them a bit differently than expected. The road trip, for example, starts out like a promising way for our two MCs to patch things up. Rhys and Derek go so far as to be able to share the same space and physical intimacy without too much trouble, courtesy of a little alcohol. The broken relationship is a star feature of the story. We start with a clear picture of just how deep the hurt goes from page one and it continues from there (until Rhys’ idea to just stop being so actively miserable works temporarily…then it’s right back to Misery Town, population two). Their daughter is the catalyst for the road trip and, of course, their happy husbands routine doesn’t work quite as they planned—the daughter is also the deus ex machina that lets this story have a happy-for-now-ish ending.
Read Camille’s review in its entirety here.
August 27, 2023
Really enjoyed this, especially as it was a nice change to read about an already established relationship that's falling apart.
Definitely emotional throughout which I'm always a fan of, and for me it felt like a realistic reaction by both characters.
The only thing that stopped me rating higher is that we don't get to know the characters before their relationship is dying, which is obviously the whole concept of being dropped into a second chance romance between characters who are on the verge of divorce, but I struggled to find the motivation at times as to why I should care if they divorced or not.
I think I needed a bit more of them from happier times woven throughout the story, even if it was in flashbacks (which I usually don't like at all!). There wasn't much shown of their relationship when it was good, so you kind of have to take their word that they had a relationship worth saving I guess. If there had been more to show they had a great, solid relationship previously then I could easily have rated this higher. I'd also liked to have seen some of the counselling after as it seemed to wrap up a bit too conveniently but I did feel like the ending was a believable one even without this.
Definitely emotional throughout which I'm always a fan of, and for me it felt like a realistic reaction by both characters.
The only thing that stopped me rating higher is that we don't get to know the characters before their relationship is dying, which is obviously the whole concept of being dropped into a second chance romance between characters who are on the verge of divorce, but I struggled to find the motivation at times as to why I should care if they divorced or not.
I think I needed a bit more of them from happier times woven throughout the story, even if it was in flashbacks (which I usually don't like at all!). There wasn't much shown of their relationship when it was good, so you kind of have to take their word that they had a relationship worth saving I guess. If there had been more to show they had a great, solid relationship previously then I could easily have rated this higher. I'd also liked to have seen some of the counselling after as it seemed to wrap up a bit too conveniently but I did feel like the ending was a believable one even without this.
January 28, 2020
Tough angst read, what I took from this story is love ❤️ can prevail if you want it enough to work for it and one has to be able to forgive your loved one if you want the relationship to work. This wasn’t easy to read but I’m so glad I did 🥰
At the end of the book I was left feeling warm and happy for Rhys and Derek! 👨❤️👨
Still amazing the 2nd time reading! 😁
At the end of the book I was left feeling warm and happy for Rhys and Derek! 👨❤️👨
Still amazing the 2nd time reading! 😁
August 16, 2024
I went into this one ready to be annoyed beyond belief(because how was I meant to believe two MCs could come back from infidelity BETWEEN them) but......
I expected excuses. I expected justifications. I expected rewriting of history to make the aggrieved party deserving of what he got. I didn't get that. (thank fuck)
What I got was instead more gut wrenching.
I got anger and betrayal and disbelief.
I got drawn out resentment. No one conversation to fix a 'misunderstanding' for this book. Derek got room to feel and express his resentment. And boyyyyyy, did he!
"We were going through a rough patch, remember?"
"Not enough for me to put my dick in another man." Welp—
It was hit, after hit, after HIT. And I was living for every one of those hits, btw. Derek has a degree of passive aggression that I can't help but admire. He found a way to weave that shit into EVERY. DAMN. CONVERSATION. 💀
The audacity of your husband asking to 'put this on hold until we get back' and the 'this' in question is the time he went to a bar and cheated on you, then came home and told you about it. 💀
The jokes write themselves.
Out loud lol @Rhys describing how uncomfortable he's been feeling about approaching his husband in the 4 months since he confessed to having cheated on him like..... 🤯FUCK YOU THOUGHT, BB? How were you expecting this to play out? Explain it like we're 5.
I could say that I rate Rhys for taking his lashings with good grace, but honestly, nah. If you cheat on your husband, nobody's going to applaud you for shit. Taking it silently is bare minimum.
Anyway, back to what I was saying.
I got a realistic if heartbreaking portrayal of Derek carrying shame for things he didn't do.
Asking himself what he could have possibly done to push Rhys to this. (spoiler alert:nothing)
Feeling embarrassed about telling people what happened between them. Torn between needing to vent and get emotional support from his people, and a strong desire not to throw Rhys to the wolves.
Torn about the (very natural) angry reactions towards Derek from his friends. Because he wanted to be mad at Rhys but didn't want everyone to be mad at Rhys FOR him. *this was always an unreasonable ask. There are cats you can never put back into the bag once they're out.
Feeling guilty and like he's throwing their relationship away because he wasn't ready to forgive an unforgivable offense.
And then feeling like he's betrayed himself and his code of beliefs when he did finally consider forgiving.
I feel like although I don't personally agree with the resolution this got, I could empathize with Derek and the reactions or decisions he took at different points during this week.
The bits that really broke me were all the times Derek had to physically restrain himself from his natural instinct to love and be loving towards Rhys because he couldn't trust him anymore.
The times he'd pull away from kisses, the time he stopped mid-sex because he physically couldn't make himself go on with all the ideas of Rhys fucking someone in his head, the time he had to ask if they were okay to continue without condoms, which they'd never needed before, the times Rhys would come home late to find him spiraling due to insecurity.
This book did an exceptional job of portraying how a thoughtless, uncaring act can have a butterfly effect of repurcussions.
Derek went from a carefree happily married person to a traumatized man who had to deal with an unexpected betrayal, had to second guess every little thing going forward, who had to go back in time and overanalyze everything to see where it all went to shit, who had to sit in the dark and ask himself how this could possibly have happened.
This man had to learn how to trust his husband again with such a tragic backdrop and many times he failed and had to pick himself back up.
I understand rebuilding trust a day at a time, but how long does it take to start trusting that your person of 9 years won't slip up like he did before and hurt you in the same specific way? 18 years? Two for each one that came before? Can you ever really get past that?
I guess this story hinges on the fact that love is enough but at some point you really have to ask yourself, is it? Because it reads like there are some things that you can say you forgive, but it changes you.
The only reason I could stand this whole thing, though? Rhys never had an answer for 'why'. Which, paradoxically, was also a problem. Like okay, you're saying you don't know why you chose to do this, but if it was a whim without basis, how can you then trust that this person wouldn't do it ever again?
The only issue I took with this is that even as a reader, Rhys didn't seem like the kind of person who would have ever done such a thing. Honestly, going in, I thought it'd be Derek. Lol. Just goes to show you can never really know an MC based on just chapter one😂
And in all honesty the only role Rhys played in this was to be the forever penitent husband. I can't even count how many times he says he's sorry. Literally. Takes his lashings, apologizes then keeps quiet until the next time.
The rest of the book is Derek going through the 5 stages of grief for their marriage. And then deciding at the end that it's worth taking the risk to make it work again.
Wait, wait, wait. Did I mention? Derek got his lick back. 💀. But somehow, Rhys was the only villain and Derek's crimes got swept under the rug. These two really should have got a divorce.
Lol. Anyway.
Sucks to be them.
I expected excuses. I expected justifications. I expected rewriting of history to make the aggrieved party deserving of what he got. I didn't get that. (thank fuck)
What I got was instead more gut wrenching.
I got anger and betrayal and disbelief.
I got drawn out resentment. No one conversation to fix a 'misunderstanding' for this book. Derek got room to feel and express his resentment. And boyyyyyy, did he!
"We were going through a rough patch, remember?"
"Not enough for me to put my dick in another man." Welp—
It was hit, after hit, after HIT. And I was living for every one of those hits, btw. Derek has a degree of passive aggression that I can't help but admire. He found a way to weave that shit into EVERY. DAMN. CONVERSATION. 💀
The audacity of your husband asking to 'put this on hold until we get back' and the 'this' in question is the time he went to a bar and cheated on you, then came home and told you about it. 💀
The jokes write themselves.
Out loud lol @Rhys describing how uncomfortable he's been feeling about approaching his husband in the 4 months since he confessed to having cheated on him like..... 🤯FUCK YOU THOUGHT, BB? How were you expecting this to play out? Explain it like we're 5.
I could say that I rate Rhys for taking his lashings with good grace, but honestly, nah. If you cheat on your husband, nobody's going to applaud you for shit. Taking it silently is bare minimum.
Anyway, back to what I was saying.
I got a realistic if heartbreaking portrayal of Derek carrying shame for things he didn't do.
Asking himself what he could have possibly done to push Rhys to this. (spoiler alert:nothing)
Feeling embarrassed about telling people what happened between them. Torn between needing to vent and get emotional support from his people, and a strong desire not to throw Rhys to the wolves.
Torn about the (very natural) angry reactions towards Derek from his friends. Because he wanted to be mad at Rhys but didn't want everyone to be mad at Rhys FOR him. *this was always an unreasonable ask. There are cats you can never put back into the bag once they're out.
Feeling guilty and like he's throwing their relationship away because he wasn't ready to forgive an unforgivable offense.
And then feeling like he's betrayed himself and his code of beliefs when he did finally consider forgiving.
I feel like although I don't personally agree with the resolution this got, I could empathize with Derek and the reactions or decisions he took at different points during this week.
The bits that really broke me were all the times Derek had to physically restrain himself from his natural instinct to love and be loving towards Rhys because he couldn't trust him anymore.
The times he'd pull away from kisses, the time he stopped mid-sex because he physically couldn't make himself go on with all the ideas of Rhys fucking someone in his head, the time he had to ask if they were okay to continue without condoms, which they'd never needed before, the times Rhys would come home late to find him spiraling due to insecurity.
This book did an exceptional job of portraying how a thoughtless, uncaring act can have a butterfly effect of repurcussions.
Derek went from a carefree happily married person to a traumatized man who had to deal with an unexpected betrayal, had to second guess every little thing going forward, who had to go back in time and overanalyze everything to see where it all went to shit, who had to sit in the dark and ask himself how this could possibly have happened.
This man had to learn how to trust his husband again with such a tragic backdrop and many times he failed and had to pick himself back up.
I understand rebuilding trust a day at a time, but how long does it take to start trusting that your person of 9 years won't slip up like he did before and hurt you in the same specific way? 18 years? Two for each one that came before? Can you ever really get past that?
I guess this story hinges on the fact that love is enough but at some point you really have to ask yourself, is it? Because it reads like there are some things that you can say you forgive, but it changes you.
The only reason I could stand this whole thing, though? Rhys never had an answer for 'why'. Which, paradoxically, was also a problem. Like okay, you're saying you don't know why you chose to do this, but if it was a whim without basis, how can you then trust that this person wouldn't do it ever again?
The only issue I took with this is that even as a reader, Rhys didn't seem like the kind of person who would have ever done such a thing. Honestly, going in, I thought it'd be Derek. Lol. Just goes to show you can never really know an MC based on just chapter one😂
And in all honesty the only role Rhys played in this was to be the forever penitent husband. I can't even count how many times he says he's sorry. Literally. Takes his lashings, apologizes then keeps quiet until the next time.
The rest of the book is Derek going through the 5 stages of grief for their marriage. And then deciding at the end that it's worth taking the risk to make it work again.
Wait, wait, wait. Did I mention? Derek got his lick back. 💀. But somehow, Rhys was the only villain and Derek's crimes got swept under the rug. These two really should have got a divorce.
Lol. Anyway.
Sucks to be them.
February 16, 2022
Is it over yet?, is a beautiful story about love, betrayal and in the end forgiveness.
My only complaint is that it could've been shorter.
Reread 2022-02-16
After rereading I'm changing my rating from four stars to five stars. This really is a spectacular love story.
My only complaint is that it could've been shorter.
Reread 2022-02-16
After rereading I'm changing my rating from four stars to five stars. This really is a spectacular love story.
June 9, 2019
I liked this. I know the subject matter is not for everyone but I'd never read something like this before. It wasn't perfect but I found myself tearing up towards the end so obviously I connected with the MC's. I like reading out of the box stories and this definitely was. I felt bad for everyone involved. I especially liked Derrick because my though process was much like his was throughout the book. Made me think a lot about second chances. I had a few issues with the writing but it wasn't enough to ruin the enjoyment of the book for me.
I started this on audio but didn't like the narrator so I switched to reading it and that worked a lot better for me.
I started this on audio but didn't like the narrator so I switched to reading it and that worked a lot better for me.
December 27, 2020
****** Spoiler Free*****
****Highly Recommended Heartache****
So I got this book, mainly because I've seen recced alot. But then Marley Valentine said that I would love it..... Marley you and I will HAVE WORDS LATER.
And then I decided to get the audio, because Michael Ferraiuolo narrates.... BIG MISTAKE, BECAUSE HE WAS AMAZING. #Brava
Why read this book...
1. The MCs are lovable.
- Rhys cheated, he is repentant and sorry and I felt for him. Yes, I felt for a cheater because this is how good this book is written. #FirstTimeForEverything
- Derek is hurt, and angry but he is still in love. He can't forgive, can't forget, and doesn’t really understand why Ryhs cheated. #MakeMeUnderstand
2. The Plot...
The cheating is off page, so this book is the aftermath. Rhys and Derek are on their way to get divorced, but their daughter's wedding sidetracks their plan. That will put them on the track to reconciliation. #PutOnABraveFace
Cheating is a hard limit for me, but I listened and I cried and I got angry and cried some more. #EmotionalRollercoaster
3. The Romance...
We get glimpses of how it was before the cheating, and then some glimpses while they try to separate and actually have the divorce. Those tiny moments were hopeful, hopeless and bittersweet. #WeHadItAll
4. The Reality...
I get that sometimes we like reading stories to forget real life. But this book was real life. Couples struggle, it's not always perfect; couples cheat and they can move on, and people make mistakes and they could be forgiven. #RealAndRaw
5. The Narration...
Was nothing short of perfect. #Encore
#HappyReading
****Highly Recommended Heartache****
So I got this book, mainly because I've seen recced alot. But then Marley Valentine said that I would love it..... Marley you and I will HAVE WORDS LATER.
And then I decided to get the audio, because Michael Ferraiuolo narrates.... BIG MISTAKE, BECAUSE HE WAS AMAZING. #Brava
Why read this book...
1. The MCs are lovable.
- Rhys cheated, he is repentant and sorry and I felt for him. Yes, I felt for a cheater because this is how good this book is written. #FirstTimeForEverything
- Derek is hurt, and angry but he is still in love. He can't forgive, can't forget, and doesn’t really understand why Ryhs cheated. #MakeMeUnderstand
2. The Plot...
The cheating is off page, so this book is the aftermath. Rhys and Derek are on their way to get divorced, but their daughter's wedding sidetracks their plan. That will put them on the track to reconciliation. #PutOnABraveFace
Cheating is a hard limit for me, but I listened and I cried and I got angry and cried some more. #EmotionalRollercoaster
3. The Romance...
We get glimpses of how it was before the cheating, and then some glimpses while they try to separate and actually have the divorce. Those tiny moments were hopeful, hopeless and bittersweet. #WeHadItAll
4. The Reality...
I get that sometimes we like reading stories to forget real life. But this book was real life. Couples struggle, it's not always perfect; couples cheat and they can move on, and people make mistakes and they could be forgiven. #RealAndRaw
5. The Narration...
Was nothing short of perfect. #Encore
#HappyReading
sample-says-no
January 13, 2019To each his own, but the subject matter of this book is a hard limit for me. I read romance for the fantasy. I don’t need this kind of reality in my books.
January 16, 2019
El título le va muy bien, la verdad
April 24, 2019
Nah
It’s not for me. If you’re in love you don’t cheat. Also cheating is not an “accident”. Like, “Oops slipped in the hole and stayed there for 15 minutes accidentally”. Lol. Nah. Your trust is absolutely broken, there’s no coming back.
It’s not for me. If you’re in love you don’t cheat. Also cheating is not an “accident”. Like, “Oops slipped in the hole and stayed there for 15 minutes accidentally”. Lol. Nah. Your trust is absolutely broken, there’s no coming back.
January 8, 2019
Honestly… just punch me in the face, it’ll hurt less.
I love, love, love stories like this one, that are so real and honest and hard !! People mess up and make mistakes, who can’t relate to that?
So, we come in to this one, with an already established relationship, Rhys and Derek are married and have been for near on a decade. But during a rough patch, after a few too many drinks, one of them ends up going home with another man. I know cheating stories are a deal breaker for some… and for someone like myself, who’s ex-husband cheated and got someone else pregnant… it hurt, reading about it. (Though, there is no on-page cheating)… The anger and bitterness that Derek felt… the need for revenge and just so much hurt….
And I loved seeing Rhys guilt and the ownership of the mistake. He never once tried to blame it on anything other than his mess up. He never tried to make excuses, he never tried to justify the mistake, because as much as it killed Derek, it was killing Rhys too.
So, planning to get divorced… they decide to wait until after their daughter’s wedding to drop the news, plus, anyone who’s been divorced, knows that it’s not just easy as 1, 2, 3. It takes planning and money and it completely flips your life upside down.
There’s one little snibbit that I loved so hard, when Derek says, “Who knew this would be the hardest part about breaking up? Not just the hurt and betrayal, not just the upheaval of our peaceful life, but realizing that small things were gone.” And it’s true… little things that you maybe took for granted while you were busy living life. Like watching tv together, or a book series you both loved and hadn’t finished. You have to mourn those things, losing them… it’s hard… and it was so perfectly written in this.
So, okay….enough of my psychoanalyzing…back to the story…. The guys had planned to wait to tell their daughter about their separation until after her wedding, but until then, and during the wedding, they wanted to put on the front that they were still together and happy. Not ideal, but I got it.
Over a 4 day long road trip and remembering all the reasons they loved each other in the first place, maybe the anger and hurt and resentment could be worked through. At times it feels like it can’t, and we go back and forth with Derek and how he feels, and then Rhys, I just wanted to hug him through the whole thing, but I loved how it ended. LOVED IT!! Could ya tell?
I could go on and on about this for days, I feel like… but I’ll spare you so you can actually read the story yourself… But, if you love second chance romances with real life hardships and mistakes.. you’ll love this one. You’ll cry over the love, the hurt, the anger, the guilt, and then the forgiveness, the relief and then the love again. I loved this book, SO MUCH! I absolutely recommend it.
5 well deserved stars from me!
I love, love, love stories like this one, that are so real and honest and hard !! People mess up and make mistakes, who can’t relate to that?
So, we come in to this one, with an already established relationship, Rhys and Derek are married and have been for near on a decade. But during a rough patch, after a few too many drinks, one of them ends up going home with another man. I know cheating stories are a deal breaker for some… and for someone like myself, who’s ex-husband cheated and got someone else pregnant… it hurt, reading about it. (Though, there is no on-page cheating)… The anger and bitterness that Derek felt… the need for revenge and just so much hurt….
And I loved seeing Rhys guilt and the ownership of the mistake. He never once tried to blame it on anything other than his mess up. He never tried to make excuses, he never tried to justify the mistake, because as much as it killed Derek, it was killing Rhys too.
So, planning to get divorced… they decide to wait until after their daughter’s wedding to drop the news, plus, anyone who’s been divorced, knows that it’s not just easy as 1, 2, 3. It takes planning and money and it completely flips your life upside down.
There’s one little snibbit that I loved so hard, when Derek says, “Who knew this would be the hardest part about breaking up? Not just the hurt and betrayal, not just the upheaval of our peaceful life, but realizing that small things were gone.” And it’s true… little things that you maybe took for granted while you were busy living life. Like watching tv together, or a book series you both loved and hadn’t finished. You have to mourn those things, losing them… it’s hard… and it was so perfectly written in this.
So, okay….enough of my psychoanalyzing…back to the story…. The guys had planned to wait to tell their daughter about their separation until after her wedding, but until then, and during the wedding, they wanted to put on the front that they were still together and happy. Not ideal, but I got it.
Over a 4 day long road trip and remembering all the reasons they loved each other in the first place, maybe the anger and hurt and resentment could be worked through. At times it feels like it can’t, and we go back and forth with Derek and how he feels, and then Rhys, I just wanted to hug him through the whole thing, but I loved how it ended. LOVED IT!! Could ya tell?
I could go on and on about this for days, I feel like… but I’ll spare you so you can actually read the story yourself… But, if you love second chance romances with real life hardships and mistakes.. you’ll love this one. You’ll cry over the love, the hurt, the anger, the guilt, and then the forgiveness, the relief and then the love again. I loved this book, SO MUCH! I absolutely recommend it.
5 well deserved stars from me!
January 7, 2019
I received a free copy of this title to read and review for Wicked Reads
4 Stars
Is It Over Yet? was an impossible book to read without feeling gutted for one reason or another. I must admit before I write my review that I am slightly biased, as I ended a 20-year marriage, one of the reasons due to infidelity. Nor did I completely blame my ex for our split, as I have flaws I've worked very hard to change. Not only that, I left my ex, came back 6 weeks later, then tried for 10 months to rebuild what he had torn apart, only to realize there was no fix when the one who broke us apart didn't truly feel responsible.
The entire premise is between Derek and Rhys, keeping their split from their daughter until after her wedding. While this is logical, it also made me feel as if they didn't believe her mature enough to handle the truth, finding it insulting from the perspective of a daughter.
This is one of the more human novels I read, where actions and reactions were definitely based in human nature, so I applaud the author, no matter how difficult it was to read. Both of them got in their own ways, but not in a manufactured fashion.
I may see this from a different perspective than many readers, having been down this road before, not just as a wounded party, but one who gave my ex another chance he squandered.
If they don't earn it, show actual emotional growth, they will treat you worse, as you now have zero self-respect for taking them back, where they will not respect you. Until both parties admit their part, it will never work.
I don't believe Rhys truly grasped how life-altering his actions were for Derek, so I didn't believe he earned forgiveness.
I felt Rhys said all the right things, but during his inner monologue, I couldn't empathize/sympathize/or feel compassion for him. I spent most of the novel trying to be even, pass no judgment, and try to see it from both of their perspectives. But when Rhys kept saying how he would one day find love again (grass is always greener, which is why he cheated in the first place- while not said out loud, it felt vaguely threatening, as if Derek didn't put up with his bs, he would find someone who would), or how he messed up or made a mistake, I was livid. I wanted so badly to feel for both of them, but these insensitive inner thoughts ruined it for me.
Rhys loved his husband, but four times mentioned to himself how he'd find love again, instead of putting in even an ounce of effort to save what he destroyed. Basically, the novel was about wearing Derek down until he gave Rhys forgiveness he didn't deserve, destroying his self-worth and self-respect.
Why do I believe that, instead of what was on the surface that everyone else is seeing?
Mistake. An accident. Messed up. Those are things people say when they AREN'T taking responsibility for their actions, said countless times both to himself and to others. What I needed from my ex, I didn't get from Rhys either. Saying you're sorry and asking for forgiveness isn't the same as actually proving you are sorry.
Numerous times, Rhys used MISTAKE, AN ACCIDENT, MESSED UP (also in curse form)
Rhys didn't make a mistake. Over dozens upon dozens of choices, he made the decision to do the act of infidelity. It isn't one choice (a mistake) that lands him in someone else's bed, but dozens before, during, and after the act. Each decision was another opportunity to stop. He called his husband, told him he was sleeping at a friend's house, then purposefully cheated on him. That is not a mistake, nor an accident, nor messing up. That is premeditated harming of your marriage and spouse, whether it be from self-destructive behavior or issues within the marriage.
There isn't a person on this planet who doesn't realize what cheating does to all parties involved- it is one of the most self-involved acts, which affected everyone involved, an act that has nothing to do with the parties being injured, outside of destroying them and their way of life.
All Rhys did was act like the martyr, saying he loved Derek, yet did NOTHING to actually show him. He whined about what he would have to do to fix it, admitting he was the one who broke it. Yet didn't realize how it looked from his ex's perspective. The cheating was the ultimate of rejection, then can't figure out why Derek wouldn't just 'give in' and admit they love each other and give him another chance. He expected it to just drop into his lap, after taking more effort into cheating than he did into the aftermath.
"I deserve it" isn't the same as giving the one you harmed closure, admitting that those choices made were with complete and total disregard to the pain he knew it would inflict. Admit to being selfish, self-destructive, and self-absorbed enough to not give two craps about the pain you're inflicting, or admit you're inflicting pain on purpose, not trivialize it by saying it happened and he can't change it, even if he wanted, so why bother apologizing again. Listening to his husband's voice while lying to him on the phone, then sleeping with another.
Sorry. Not sorry.
Many readers will see this differently than me...
Not once did Rhys show in his inner monologue that he got it.
Regret? Yes.
Wished he didn't do it? Yes.
If anything, Rhys acted as his own victim.
As for the daughter, it annoyed me how she wasn't told the whole of the truth. As he told her about making vows to her on his own wedding day, if he could break vows to her father, he could so easily break them to her. That's why infidelity is seen as cheating on the family, not just the spouse. So, while this was a teary-eyed emotional scene for me, I felt it disingenuous coming from him, when he was more worried about being a martyr and his own victim, than admitting that he hurt his husband and daughter with purpose.
Until Rhys admitted every choice he made was with complete and total knowledge of how much it would harm his husband and daughter, he doesn't deserve to be forgiven.
Do people make mistakes? Yes.
Can a marriage survive? Yes, but only if that one condition above is met, which it was not.
Derek gave in due to 'We love each other' and Rhys may or may not have learned anything, because he still sees it as a mistake, not a conscious decision on his part to do harm.
Kudos to the author for writing something so authentically, realistically messy, mirroring real life and how we act/react to this emotionally crippling event.
Do I believe in the resolution? NO, because all Rhys learned was to look contrite long enough, Derek will be a doormat and forgive him, no matter what, because they love one another. If Rhys loved Derek and their daughter enough, he wouldn't have done it in the first place. If he understood the gravity of his actions, he would admit he cheated with full knowledge of how painful it would be for Derek and their daughter. THAT is how he would learn and be given forgiveness.
When I saw the line, "He messed (curse form) up once." It killed me for Derek and every other victim of infidelity out there. No, Rhys didn't mess up once. He made dozens of choices before he cheated. The main act may have been once, but it wasn't ONCE. Every time he followed along that path, he was making another decision to cause pain and destroy their marriage. He may not do it again, but justifying this lessens self-worth.
We are worth enough to expect better out of those who say they love us. Until that happens, there's an imbalance in the relationship.
Quote: inserting 'messed up' for the profanity, since this was also used many times too.
"Rhys had messed up by going to bed with that guy. Was I also messing up by letting that one mistake end our marriage?"
No, Derek is messing up by honestly minimizing this to 'one' when it was many choices for one major act. But, that's about as realistic as it gets, isn't it? It's why I went back, because I loved him, but his actions are proof he didn't love me. I'm far too cynical not to be triggered by this novel and see it as a second-chance easily taken for granted since no TRUE closure was given, ignoring due to love is not a fix.
4 Stars
Is It Over Yet? was an impossible book to read without feeling gutted for one reason or another. I must admit before I write my review that I am slightly biased, as I ended a 20-year marriage, one of the reasons due to infidelity. Nor did I completely blame my ex for our split, as I have flaws I've worked very hard to change. Not only that, I left my ex, came back 6 weeks later, then tried for 10 months to rebuild what he had torn apart, only to realize there was no fix when the one who broke us apart didn't truly feel responsible.
The entire premise is between Derek and Rhys, keeping their split from their daughter until after her wedding. While this is logical, it also made me feel as if they didn't believe her mature enough to handle the truth, finding it insulting from the perspective of a daughter.
This is one of the more human novels I read, where actions and reactions were definitely based in human nature, so I applaud the author, no matter how difficult it was to read. Both of them got in their own ways, but not in a manufactured fashion.
I may see this from a different perspective than many readers, having been down this road before, not just as a wounded party, but one who gave my ex another chance he squandered.
If they don't earn it, show actual emotional growth, they will treat you worse, as you now have zero self-respect for taking them back, where they will not respect you. Until both parties admit their part, it will never work.
I don't believe Rhys truly grasped how life-altering his actions were for Derek, so I didn't believe he earned forgiveness.
I felt Rhys said all the right things, but during his inner monologue, I couldn't empathize/sympathize/or feel compassion for him. I spent most of the novel trying to be even, pass no judgment, and try to see it from both of their perspectives. But when Rhys kept saying how he would one day find love again (grass is always greener, which is why he cheated in the first place- while not said out loud, it felt vaguely threatening, as if Derek didn't put up with his bs, he would find someone who would), or how he messed up or made a mistake, I was livid. I wanted so badly to feel for both of them, but these insensitive inner thoughts ruined it for me.
Rhys loved his husband, but four times mentioned to himself how he'd find love again, instead of putting in even an ounce of effort to save what he destroyed. Basically, the novel was about wearing Derek down until he gave Rhys forgiveness he didn't deserve, destroying his self-worth and self-respect.
Why do I believe that, instead of what was on the surface that everyone else is seeing?
Mistake. An accident. Messed up. Those are things people say when they AREN'T taking responsibility for their actions, said countless times both to himself and to others. What I needed from my ex, I didn't get from Rhys either. Saying you're sorry and asking for forgiveness isn't the same as actually proving you are sorry.
Numerous times, Rhys used MISTAKE, AN ACCIDENT, MESSED UP (also in curse form)
Rhys didn't make a mistake. Over dozens upon dozens of choices, he made the decision to do the act of infidelity. It isn't one choice (a mistake) that lands him in someone else's bed, but dozens before, during, and after the act. Each decision was another opportunity to stop. He called his husband, told him he was sleeping at a friend's house, then purposefully cheated on him. That is not a mistake, nor an accident, nor messing up. That is premeditated harming of your marriage and spouse, whether it be from self-destructive behavior or issues within the marriage.
There isn't a person on this planet who doesn't realize what cheating does to all parties involved- it is one of the most self-involved acts, which affected everyone involved, an act that has nothing to do with the parties being injured, outside of destroying them and their way of life.
All Rhys did was act like the martyr, saying he loved Derek, yet did NOTHING to actually show him. He whined about what he would have to do to fix it, admitting he was the one who broke it. Yet didn't realize how it looked from his ex's perspective. The cheating was the ultimate of rejection, then can't figure out why Derek wouldn't just 'give in' and admit they love each other and give him another chance. He expected it to just drop into his lap, after taking more effort into cheating than he did into the aftermath.
"I deserve it" isn't the same as giving the one you harmed closure, admitting that those choices made were with complete and total disregard to the pain he knew it would inflict. Admit to being selfish, self-destructive, and self-absorbed enough to not give two craps about the pain you're inflicting, or admit you're inflicting pain on purpose, not trivialize it by saying it happened and he can't change it, even if he wanted, so why bother apologizing again. Listening to his husband's voice while lying to him on the phone, then sleeping with another.
Sorry. Not sorry.
Many readers will see this differently than me...
Not once did Rhys show in his inner monologue that he got it.
Regret? Yes.
Wished he didn't do it? Yes.
If anything, Rhys acted as his own victim.
As for the daughter, it annoyed me how she wasn't told the whole of the truth. As he told her about making vows to her on his own wedding day, if he could break vows to her father, he could so easily break them to her. That's why infidelity is seen as cheating on the family, not just the spouse. So, while this was a teary-eyed emotional scene for me, I felt it disingenuous coming from him, when he was more worried about being a martyr and his own victim, than admitting that he hurt his husband and daughter with purpose.
Until Rhys admitted every choice he made was with complete and total knowledge of how much it would harm his husband and daughter, he doesn't deserve to be forgiven.
Do people make mistakes? Yes.
Can a marriage survive? Yes, but only if that one condition above is met, which it was not.
Derek gave in due to 'We love each other' and Rhys may or may not have learned anything, because he still sees it as a mistake, not a conscious decision on his part to do harm.
Kudos to the author for writing something so authentically, realistically messy, mirroring real life and how we act/react to this emotionally crippling event.
Do I believe in the resolution? NO, because all Rhys learned was to look contrite long enough, Derek will be a doormat and forgive him, no matter what, because they love one another. If Rhys loved Derek and their daughter enough, he wouldn't have done it in the first place. If he understood the gravity of his actions, he would admit he cheated with full knowledge of how painful it would be for Derek and their daughter. THAT is how he would learn and be given forgiveness.
When I saw the line, "He messed (curse form) up once." It killed me for Derek and every other victim of infidelity out there. No, Rhys didn't mess up once. He made dozens of choices before he cheated. The main act may have been once, but it wasn't ONCE. Every time he followed along that path, he was making another decision to cause pain and destroy their marriage. He may not do it again, but justifying this lessens self-worth.
We are worth enough to expect better out of those who say they love us. Until that happens, there's an imbalance in the relationship.
Quote: inserting 'messed up' for the profanity, since this was also used many times too.
"Rhys had messed up by going to bed with that guy. Was I also messing up by letting that one mistake end our marriage?"
No, Derek is messing up by honestly minimizing this to 'one' when it was many choices for one major act. But, that's about as realistic as it gets, isn't it? It's why I went back, because I loved him, but his actions are proof he didn't love me. I'm far too cynical not to be triggered by this novel and see it as a second-chance easily taken for granted since no TRUE closure was given, ignoring due to love is not a fix.
January 11, 2019
I sweet story of two people coming back together after one of them cheats. I enjoyed this book, and liked Rhys and Derek.
I’m not someone who thinks cheating has to be a deal breaker. I feel as Sara in this book does. Other readers may feel differently.
I’m not someone who thinks cheating has to be a deal breaker. I feel as Sara in this book does. Other readers may feel differently.
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December 10, 2018Available January 8.
January 7, 2019
This book was about the aftermath of a husband cheating.. and I actually felt bad for the one who cheated...How's that happen!?
It starts about 3 months or so after "it" happens and they're still stuck in the same house together. To say things are tense and awkward is an understatement.
On top of which, now they have to road trip to their daughters wedding.
Gutted.
There's an entire range of emotions from both guys and, gah, that was hard, especially in such a small space.
Just when you think they're going to get it together, BAM! Emotions. All of them.
I loved that Rhys didn't make any excuses for himself, because there were none to give. He f*cked up, plain and simple.
It was also kinda cute and makes you look at that specific situation in a new light. Usually I'm a hard limited no on the subject but this one didn't enraged me like it usually would. I was sympathetic to both characters and i loved them and totally was cheering them on the whole way.
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