2 stars – I wanted to love this so badly, but… yikes!
I love whodunnits. Adore them. If I ever got stranded on a deserted island and could only take one book genre with me, I wouldn’t even blink, give me whodunnits and I’m good. In a world with genocide, injustices and apocalyptic headlines every day, whodunnits are the one place where good wins, wrongs get righted, and there’s always a practical, logical system to it all. Add rural England into the mix? That’s basically the whodunnit gold standard.
So with that mindset, and after having loved A Fatal Obsession, I expected to fall head over heels for this one. It had everything I usually enjoy: sleepy English village, strong female lead, even a promising start. And yet… from the first few pages, something felt off. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it.
Then, around page 50, it hit me: the writing was just bad.
If I had a nickel for every time the main character was described as “Junoesque,” well, I’d probably have 8 or 9 nickels, but that’s like the same clunky word recycled every 25 pages or so. We get it. She’s curvy. You don’t have to beat us over the head with it.
Then there’s the throbbing figures of speech (alliteration intended) which make ChatGPT look like a literature Nobel prize laureate.
Still, I kept going, hoping the mystery would pull through. But then I guessed the killer the moment the murder happened. Emphasis on “guessed it”. And I never do that! I don’t want to solve the mystery. I live for that final drawing room moment where the detective lays it all out and I gasp, “Ohhh, I missed that!” Instead, what I got here was a lame attempt. Not only was I right, but the clues and motives were absurd. Like, Scooby Doo-level absurd.
And I can’t, for the life of me, understand how the same author who gave us Ryder and Loveday, with their perfectly flawed characters and just the right amount of feminism sprinkled in, wrote this. A weak mystery, paper-thin characters, and a lazy “rich vs working class” theme that felt phoned in.
I hate writing bad reviews. But this one really let me down. I’ll still give Faith Martin another shot because A Fatal Obsession was that good, but The Birthday Mystery is a hard pass from me.