Over the years, as I've encountered more and more people of different backgrounds my view of the world and its people has evolved. Once my friendship circle was rather small, with most looking much I do -- white/Euro-American. I did have a chance to travel to Brazil in my teens, but by and large, my community wasn't all that diverse. But as time went on, especially after I moved onto seminary the circles expanded, at least in terms of ethnicity/race. In the past two decades, the circle has broadened even more as I've lived in religiously diverse communities. As this has taken place my friendship circle has expanded to include Jews, Muslims, Buddhists, Hindus, Sikhs, and more.
Dana Robert, professor of World Christianity and History of Mission at the Boston University School of Theology, invites us to envision friendships that cross cultures and embrace diversity. The book focuses on diversity in the Christian community, though reference made occasionally to interfaith relationships (that's, in essence, another book). In this context, diversity exists in ethnic, gender, and socio-economic terms (thought it is primarily ethnic in this book).
In her introduction, Robert writes that "Friendship forms Christian identity." (p. 4). She then says that Jesus and his disciples are the primary model of friendship. So, with Jesus as the model, friendship is the means by which Christian community is created. With that in mind she reports hearing Gustavo Gutierrez speak of the preferential option for the poor as friendship with the poor. As to what he meant by friendship, she records that Gutierrez "meant shared discipleship---faithful obedience to the God of live, walking together in equality with and respect for specific persons whom God loves, and caring for the world God shares." (p. 6) Such friendships aren't easy but they point toward the realm of God.
Robert explores friendship through narrative, introducing us to persons who lived in diverse settings, often cross-cultural ones, including mission contexts. The first chapter focuses on a biblical foundation as seen in the life of Jesus. Then she moves to a broader conversation focusing on practices of friendship in modern history. This leads to four chapters in which she offers biographies of exemplary Christians who lived in the past century and engaged in cross-cultural friendships as central to their Christian identity.
With regard to the biblical foundations, Robert lifts up three spiritual dimensions. First, friendship is rooted in a concrete relationship with Jesus. Secondly, this relationship requires listening and mutuality. Finally, it involves empathy and suffering with others. We will see all three exhibited in what follows. In regard to the historical setting, she emphasizes enculturation and involved a commitment to Jesus' message of love.
Chapter 3 begins a series of biographical stories that illustrate elements of friendship. She starts in chapter 3 with a discussion of friendship in relationship to "remaining." Here we have three stories from missional contexts in which people stayed in friendship in difficult situations, and in doing so embodied God's presence. Chapter 4 speaks of Exile, and offers stories of those who remained behind in cross-cultural contexts, being separated from family and friends. Thus, one story is that of Eric Liddell, who remained in China and died in a Japanese prison camp and that of a cross-cultural marriage that required an American to remain in Japan during World War II, become a Japanese citizen because he couldn't bring his Japanese wife to the United States. She writes that the "hard lesson of exile teaches that Christian fellowship can transcend challenging political and social differences." (p. 111). In chapter 5, titled "Testimony," Robert declares that "friendship is a struggle." It is such both externally (such as when "political, social, and ethnic divisions run high"), and internally (including misunderstanding, betrayal, other internal challenges). The stories here include a friendship between a white Rhodesian pastor and a black pastor during the Civil War following the declaration of independence. The second is the story of friendships in the midst of resistance to a Korean dictator, and finally the friendship of white and black men in the American South. She writes that "the great lesson of struggle in friendship is that despite trauma, new discovery of God's love appears possible in the light of shared community." (p. 139). Then in chapter six, the theme is celebration and joy. The point is that no matter the situation, "friendship is a cause for celebration." (p. 141). Among the friendships explored here is that of Henri Nouwen with Adam at L'Arche and that of Frank Laubach's friendship with the Muslim Moro people in Philippines, which gave birth to a literacy movement.
In chapter seven, Dana Robert she suggests that cross-cultural Christian friendships are the "mustard seeds of hope." They are biblical and "essential to the mission of the church. Thus, "as believers reach across cultural, political, and social boundaries in the name of Christ, they forge relationships of equality and care that are signposts of the kingdom of God" (p. 165). There are limits and challenges to be dealt with, but the promise is there. She offers in the stories told in the book evidence of this fact. To truly understand what this means, we need to recognize that friendship is "a bottom-up spiritual practice, not a top-down strategy" (p. 169). There are not five easy steps to friendship!
Friendship. It is at the heart of the Christian faith, though too often it is neglected. Robert offers us an opportunity to consider what this relational dimension of our faith, one rooted in the person of Jesus, can provide if we are willing to embrace it.