A Marriage Made in Heaven: Or Too Tired for an Affair

by Erma Bombeck

In this lovingly hilarious look at her 44-years-and-counting marriage to a man she wouldn't trade for anything in the world -- who would finish her sentences? -- Erma Bombeck offers observations as only she can,

Genres: Humor, Nonfiction, Biography, Memoir, Marriage, Book Club, Comedy

Mass Market Paperback

First published September 1, 1993

About the author

Erma Louise Bombeck, born Erma Fiste, was an American humorist who achieved great popularity for a newspaper column that depicted suburban home life humorously, in the second half of the 20th century.

For 31 years since 1965, Erma Bombeck published 4,000 newspaper articles. Already in the 1970s, her witty columns were read, twice weekly, by thirty million readers of 900 newspapers of USA and Canada. Besides, the majority of her 15 books became instant best sellers.

Reviews

[Debbie W. · Rating 4 out of 5]

Why I chose to read this book:

1. I'm continuing my quest to search out books of humor this January, so reading a book by the "Queen of Humor" herself must be included!
2. My mom worshipped Bombeck and adored her writing! I've read a couple of her books already, and I'd have to concur.

Positives:
1. Her lighthearted humor about her marriage's ups and downs earned some chuckles, especially when she and Bill (her husband) got their first TV, hung wallpaper together, raised three children, and even had "creative" arguments!;
2. I think most wives and mothers could relate to her chapter "Bless Me Everybody for I Have Sinned". You try to do it all and still feel like you failed in some way. Her quote "refining guilt and elevating it to a sacrament" says it all; and,
3. some tears were shed as I read her chapters about her miscarriage and her successful fight with breast cancer.

Erma Bombeck, was a humorist who wrote a syndicated column, fifteen books and even a sitcom (albeit short-lived) titled Maggie, mostly about the trials and tribulations of marriage and motherhood. After listening to speaker Betty Friedan and reading her book, The Feminine Mystique, Bombeck got inspired to write a column for her local newspaper. The rest is history!

Overall, Bombeck's book is heartwarming, headshaking and occasionally sobering. As a wife and mother myself, I could easily relate. RIP, Erma! 💕

[Mariah Roze · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was a 2.5 stars. It was boring but I think it is because I couldn't relate. The women is a lot older than me and our lives and expectations of being female are really different.


"In this lovingly hilarious look at her 44-years-and-counting marriage to a man she wouldn't trade for anything in the world -- who would finish her sentences? -- Erma Bombeck offers observations as only she can, on: The true test of compatibility: buying a house that "needs work". Surviving parenthood, and the nest that won't stay empty. How times of struggle are a piece of cake compared to handling success. Elevating guilt to a sacrament. What to do with a man who saves instruction manuals; thinks a fishing license makes a great anniversary gift; and, thanks to the remote control, has never seen a television commercial. Frazzled mothers wondering who they have to sleep with to get fired from the job. Facing maternity, mortality, and metamorphosis together This entertaining portrait of an American marriage is Erma Bombeck at her most intimate, and her funniest."

[Ritu · Rating 4 out of 5]

A fun book to read. This is Erma's memoir frm the early years of her marriage to later golden years. She reveals her bout with breast cancer and her reaction. Her humour, her unique way of looking at life, taking what life dealt with her, looking at situations right between the eyes. She had a supportive husband who let Erma blossom and try out new things, career, activities in her life..of course you cannot let someone do things if the person does not take the intiative to do it...so it is an interesting book...a must read..

[Donna · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love Erma Bombeck. I read her newspaper column as a teen. This book was probably 4 stars for me, but just for the fact that her humor is never mean spirited (which I applaud) I'll up it to 5. This was a a fun and entertaining read. She seemed to nail the suburban housewife trials and tribulations.

This book was focused on marriage and it was quite funny at times. She has such a positive way with words. Definitely worth the time to read.

[Shiloah · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book seemed a little more sarcastic at first compared to her usual offerings. However, she offers so much vulnerability, realism, and wisdom that it makes it comforting to read. I laughed and cringed, as I knew oh so well what some of her experiences were like for me in my life. She always wraps up her books in a way that make you feel glad to be alive. I have read Erma off and on for fifteen-ish years. I always smiled and enjoyed them in a distant sort of way. Now that I’m in my forties, her books take on new meaning and I truly appreciate the friendship I feel for her as she shares all. I am so grateful for her writings.

[MONIKA · Rating 4 out of 5]

Love her books and loved this one too. Each chapter unfolds new mysteries a wedding lock has to offer. I was glad she included all aspects of her life including pregnancies, miscarriages, career, house maker, house owning, etc. There was never a dull moment. Helps you make light of your day to day situations and enjoy life. I wish I was able to read her newspaper columns too!

[Bukcrz · Rating 5 out of 5]

I usually shy away from autobiographies because after reading Fortune's Children: The Fall of the House of Vanderbilt a few years back I was left lacking.
Then I read this book's blurb promising humor and it delivered and more. This is a book with a self-deprecating humor that in no way demean characters in the book or the reader. The author's candid presentation of her life and marriage took off the blinders in my eyes as I take a real look at my husband, my parents, my son, my marriage, and even myself.
The author spoke of marriage without demeaning her husband. She spoke of her kids without making you feel your kids can't measure up. She spoke of her friends without making the reader an outsider. She spoke of her parents and in-laws without slinging mud. She even spoke about changes in life that often trip marriages and individuals that made me imagine her all tussled up from life yet she's still standing up pumping her fist in the air with glee because she came out, maybe not victorious, but more alright.
Mind you, the author has her own values regarding marriage that might not agree with other's but not in a preachy manner.
Overall, this book is a must read for everyone, married or otherwise.
Recommended!

[Jennifer Kepler · Rating 5 out of 5]

I listened to this on a long road trip between NY and NC. It made the trip fly by and had I gotten home before I finished listening I would have stayed in the car to finish - even after a 9 hour drive. This was a great book about marriage through the ages and stages of life. It makes you feel normal that your spouse isn't perfect and that you are not crazy for wondering why he isn't. It puts an interesting perspective on marriage for me now - as a some-what newlywed - and the future of my marriage down the road. It was funny and touching and wonderful. I'm looking forward to see more of what Bombeck has to offer.

[Rebecca · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a cute book, taking readers through most of the adult life of Erma Bombeck. One of my favorite parts was when she and her husband were driving home from a celebration (they had been married several years already, children mostly gone already) and she asks her husband if they've ever had a meaningful conversation in their entire marriage. He says he's not sure and asks what one would sound like. haha! She makes it sound so normal!
3 1/2 stars

[Adrienne Kiser · Rating 5 out of 5]

In her trademark way, Erma Bombeck deftly combines both humor and poignancy into an autobiographical story of her married life.

[Abigail (42stitches) · Rating 5 out of 5]

What Betty Friedan would be if she had a sense of humor.

[Joanne · Rating 5 out of 5]

LOVE IT! It was a bridal shower gift from my mother -- I still refer to it (better than smacking him!)

[Christine · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a fun, but poignant read. Perfect for me.

[Jodi · Rating 5 out of 5]

Apparently, there were a lot of Erma Bombeck books on the library free shelf and I grabbed them all. I must have then stuffed them in my closet and forgotten about them. Several of her other books I was not crazy about but this one made me laugh. Is it better or was I just in the right mood to read it? Who knows!! However, I've been married over 19 years and I'm definitely too tired for an affair. I can relate to the fatigue of raising children, the horror of teenagers, and trying to juggle a job with family life. The story of the female lovebird who almost pecked her mate to death, but then once healed the male wanted back in with the female is the epitome of marriage - you love each other, you hate each other, you love each other, life is tough but easier together. I love my husband, couldn't live with out him but sometimes he drives me crazy. I think Erma Bombeck would completely understand!

[Eva · Rating 3 out of 5]

I liked this book well enough, it's a quick, amusing read. The author is funny and sarcastic yet in mostly a good way. I wouldn't say this is a deep book, but I enjoyed the condensing of their lives if only because I haven't lived as long. I wonder what I'll remember and treasure about my marriage when I'm old? I daresay it will be different than hers, but I think the most important point she made is that their marriage lasted because both were comfortable and trusting of the others' choices and pursuits. They didn't get in each others' way.

[Sally Lindsay-briggs · Rating 5 out of 5]

In the midst of trying to get a job, the pandemic that never ends and boredom, this book is very poignant and very humorous! Loved it completely.

[claire elizabeth · Rating 4 out of 5]

so much fun & relatable

[Cheree Moore · Rating 4 out of 5]

When I was a teenager I read several Erma Bombeck books that my mom had checked out of the library. They were hysterical. Even as a teenager, the honesty and humor of everyday life was not lost on me.

My most recent book to read was A Marriage Made in Heaven: Or Too Tired for an Affair and was full of gems on getting married, wading through the waters of being a wife and a mother, joining the workforce, becoming super mom, and growing old with your mate.

Excerpts from the book:

What Bill and I looked like and how we lived didn't seem to matter anymore. The impact was driven home one afternoon when I realized there was nothing of either of us left in the house any more. Our hobbies and interests had been regulated to cardboard boxes and stored in the attic. Our favorite books had been replaced by doctors Spock and Seuss. We didn't have toys of our own... they had been replaced by head-bumping mobiles and shin-cracking rocking horses. Even our wedding picture had been replaced by a framed naked baby.

All the wages from both our paychecks went into one account and we shared. All the daily experiences of our individual jobs were exchanged over dinner and we shared. All the child raising and crud detail – the baton twirling classes, the orthodontist appointments, car pools, shopping and errands – were mine alone.

When married couples say "We never argue," it's an incomplete sentence. "We never argue in public/in front of the children/during sex," maybe. But there is something wrong with two people who agree to never disagree.

Women generally hang on to their illusions about romance. They want desperately to believe it's a phase men go through and that one day they will appear at the door with violets out of season, a bottle of wine, and two airline tickets to Paris... That will happen on the day two squirrels sit down at our picnic table feeder and order a corn-on-the-cob daiquiri.

There are no marriage manuals. It's just as well. If there were, no one would get married. It would be like reading a book on how babies are born. They both sound worse than they are. There are no guarantees that marriage will work when you get it home. There are no exchanges or credits or returns. No life-time batteries. It's a high-risk profession.

[Sarah Stevens · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is an effortless read, but somewhat choppy. It reads like a series of humorous blog posts loosely strung together by a (very) general theme. There is a sprinkling of introspection and comments on the historical context of social change, but if you are waiting for her to draw any sort of philosophical conclusions from those, you will be disappointed. I pulled one or two tidbits of relationship observances that I thought were interesting, but other than that the situations are all very trite, illuminated with somewhat clever jokes and analogies. Overall, it was entertaining, but not anything special.

[Cindy Woodworth · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a beautiful memoir on marriage, children, grandchildren and just an overall story about the different stages in life. It touched on many emotional topics and had a twist of humour. I loved this book and would recommend it. I now realize why my mother read Erma Bombeck books. She’s a wonderful author and will be reading more of her books.

[Chris · Rating 3 out of 5]

I listened to the audio book and it's really good.

I do recommend this book.

[Erin Militzer · Rating 4 out of 5]

I laughed over and over. Clever book and spot on.

[Shannan · Rating 3 out of 5]

I did not know about Erma Bombeck until now. The highlight of her career was when she was a housewife in the 60's and 70's and wrote a weekly column telling of the humor she found in parenting and keeping a house. Her work in the 80's and 90's was of a more reflective nature and this was one of her last books she wrote as it was published in '92. This book is a chronology of her marriage and her career and how the two intersected. I gobbled up the first half of the book as it is the part of her life when she first marries and starts a family (in the late 50's). This woman's experience was almost 60 years ago, yet I struggle WITH THE EXACT SAME THINGS!! Who would have thought? As the book progesses, she recounts entering the workplace full force as she becomes an accomplished author and her children leave the nest. I'm pretty far away from this part of my life so I found it unrelatable and boring. Not to say that the author or the retelling of her life is boring, it's just not something I'm really interested in reading right now. I like so much more when she talks about the day in, day out humor of keeping a home and being a wife/mother. I think I'll read some of her older works from the 70's and 80's to get a sense of that.

[Adam Dunn · Rating 4 out of 5]

I like many of the reviewers on here read Erma Bombeck as a teenager. I think I may be the only boy to do so. I don't know how many other 12 and 13 year old boys were reading Bombeck in the late eighties.
This being said I remember her very fondly and when a friend picked up this book recently, and it coincided with my recent wedding, I picked up this book and couldn't put it down.
Although it was nice to reconnect with the author, I don't think this was one of her funnier books. Near the beginning of the book I was on the subway reading and I was crying I was laughing so hard. I had to stop! The bit about her husband saying "Why did you wait until you were married to get the mumps?" or sneaking up behind someone and giving them the Heimlich manoeuver were priceless.
Later the book moved into more personal experiences that were nice to share but harder to relate to and therefore less funny. I still had a smile on my face the whole time I read it though.

[Patty Mora · Rating 4 out of 5]

I loved this book! I think that I laughed out loud every other chapter.

Erma Bombeck was a true gem. Her wit and keen observations about marriage are right on, even if this book was published almost twenty years ago. It is timeless.

As I was reading this book, I often wondered if she was peeking in my kitchen window, because the things she said about husbands and wives were so true about my own marriage.

Like I said, this book is timeless and I would recommend it to any one who is married or contemplating marriage. It cracked me up.

Too bad my husband hates to read. He might enjoy this one. Then again, he might be insulted by it. I don't think he "gets it" (the humor in any marriage). Maybe that's why I enjoyed this book so much, because Erma and me have like minds.

[Elise · Rating 3 out of 5]

I wasn't rolling on the floor laughing, but it was fun nonetheless.

I was a bit annoyed at the beginning when she was complaining so much about her husband's TV-watching habits. I'm thinking, really? You couldn't figure out this conflict so you just made it into a joke? This seems like one of the easiest issues in a marriage to resolve, but whatever. She's writing just to make us laugh, so that's probably not the way she handled it in real life.

I first thought her humor was kind of over-the-top, but I enjoyed it more as the book went on. I guess these days I'm more used to sarcastic humor; hers is more hyperbolic humor, if I can make up a term right there :).

[Ami E. Bowen · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love Erma's books! While other kids were sneakily reading the latest issue of Batman or Archie & Veronica comic books between the pages of their schoolbooks during class I was trying not to get caught laughing too loudly at the pages of the latest book by humorist author Erma Bombeck. Its safe to say that I grew up with her books and her name, and stories, just like V.C. Andrews', another author I grew up reading, brings back a lot of good reading memories. Erma, and her writing, will be dearly missed. We lucky that she left behind a treasure trove of very funny writing in her wake for generations to enjoy.

[Vicki · Rating 2 out of 5]

I love reading Erma's humorous and witty writings, but found this to be my least favorite of her books. Perhaps because I often found myself feeling sorry for her. It was a little too serious at times and I certainly could relate on many aspects. She again, however, always comes through with a way of putting a smile on your face throughout any of lifes situations. Erma was blessed with a remarkable husband who stood beside her through thick or thin. Someone, I think, every woman longs for in her life. An easy, entertaining read. If you get bogged down with it, dont give up like I almost did. Finish the book. The best is yet to come.

[Deirdre · Rating 4 out of 5]

Erma Bombeck has a unique way of looking at life and of writing about it. She shines through the pages as being a person who can take the sickness with the health and tries her damndest to see the funny in something that could fill you with despair. While many of the stories are laugh-out-loud funny they also induced a wry smile occasionally and when she spoke about her miscarriages I nearly cried. What she doesn't mention sometimes is almost as important as what she does mention.

I would recommend it.

[Victoria · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was looking for something funny and clean and ran into this. Chuck Swindoll in his sermons has used some of Erma Bombecks stuff so I got it on Audible. This would rank more of a 3.5 than a 4 I think. I couldn't love it as much as I wanted to. I am a whole different generation, have no children and don't have a TV addict husband so I just couldn't relate to a lot of stuff. Yet, I did laugh out loud more than once, I got teary once and came home one day and NEEDED to give my husband a hug and let him know I loved him. Not bad for a short, inexpensive, humour book.