Waiting for the perfect hour where we can click / Distance is what strengthens our relationship, boy / I’ve never met you~uu, oh what I could do~oo (Online Lover – Valiant Variant).
Here’s a quirky tidbit, this isn’t the third time I’ve read this, in fact, it's not even the fourth time! I won’t tell you which reread we’re on right now, but just know that the number is embarrassingly high. Somewhere in the upper tens, that's for sure! Hm, it doesn't sound as impressive when I put it that way... so yeah, sometimes I treat reading like indulging in some Dim sum, where there’s always such a wide array of different delicious foods that I can't help but end up taking a bite out of everything. A little bit of this, a little bit of that! You know, like that disgusting tomato eating king from The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King, only instead of juicy foods, I’m reading a chapter of one book here only to switch to another over there. Anyway, it’s weird that Technically, You Started It has become my go-to comfort read over the years considering I first read it during that influx of a million other YA books that all have the same premise and relationship dynamic between romantic leads, and yet something about this book has always stuck with me. For one, it’s unique in the sense that it’s told entirely through the text messages between a girl named Haley and a classmate she'd never really talked to before named Martin. Sure, I could see how people might be turned off of the presentation, but it's used more as a narrative device than anything, as if you're able to look past the "texting" aspect, then this book entirely dialogue. Absolutely no descriptive language whatsoever! So… my dream book, basically. Okay wait, that makes me sound like I hate the way most books are written, but going "full dialogue" mode really works for Technically, You Started It simply because this novel follows the same conventions of every other YA book to where it almost feels like a thought experiment seeing if you can cut out all the fluff and still tell a coherent story. It's like the YA equivalent to what In A Violent Nature did for horror movies! I mean, if this book had been written in a more traditional prose, then my brain would have made no distinction between it and The Upside of Falling by Alex Light. And look, there’s a lot that could have gone wrong here, because the thing is… most text conversations aren’t actually that interesting. To other people, that is. Because I know a lot of folks love sharing their own text convos on social media to show how clever and funny they are, but they’re usually so full of random ass memes and inside jokes that nobody who’s Dear, Evan Hansen, on the outside looking in finds it as charming as they do.
And I get it, you know? I’m always laughing at the things I say, but I’m under no delusion that somebody else would find my obscure references as funny as I do. So in that sense, I do think it's necessary for any kind of literary enjoyment for this book to not directly translate the way people actually text with 100% accuracy! The overly formal way that Haley and Martin text didn't bother me because at the end of the day, this is a book and books need to be legible! If it were a complete recreation of the way some of these youngsters talk (or me, I guess), there would be so many memes and uses of the word “bro” that I would find it totally incomprehensible, bro. This would normally be the part where I give you the synopsis, but it’s kind of hard to get the details right in a concise manner, so I’ll just say it’s like the “good ending” answer to David Levithan’s half of Will Grayson, Will Grayson. What does that mean? Um well, it's about a meaningful relationship blossoming online without the whole deception angle ruining things. Otherwise, I think all good characters need to be relatable on some level, but with me personally? I’m not really one to literally imagine my Asian ass existing in the stories that I read, and I’m more than happy to exist as a passive observer. Nonetheless, every now and then I read something where the characters actually talk about a topic I know intimately, and I can’t lie that my ears perk up like a dog at dinner time. I think I’ve spoken before about how books that pride themselves on being “nerdy” should be more specific about whatever nerd shit the characters are into, and it makes me go all detective mode on the details, you know? During one of their conversations, Martin mentions that he’s “playing Xbox at Jack’s place”, and judging from when this book came out (2019) and the kinds of games that were popular on Xbox at the time, I have to assume he was either playing Apex Legends, Fortnite, or Overwatch! Yet, after my masterful Sherlock scan, I quickly realized that he couldn’t have possibly been playing any of them because Haley then asks in the very next line if “he [being Martin] was stomping him” to which Martin replies, “You know it” which makes me think that Martin and Jack are playing against each other? Sounds normal, right? Wrong! It's odd because while all those games up there are multiplayer, they're also online multiplayer games where you don’t go against the person who’s sitting next to you. We don’t live in the classic era of couch gaming like Super Smash Bros.! Glaring error, is all I have to say.
“I’m still working on coming up with something clever.”
“You’ve managed odd, so that’s at least something.”
“Is it? Odd I can work with.”
…Oh wait, maybe he was playing Mortal Kombat or Soulcalibur or something boring like that, that would make a lot more sense! Sorry, my disinterest in fighting games is so overwhelmingly strong that I often forget they even exist. I'm not trying to memorize a million different combos and learn each characters different invisible hit box just to get a leg up on the competition! That's not my scene, my guy. Anyway, all of that was way off topic, but maybe that’s yet another way that I relate to Haley, because I also get super involved in nonsensical details that don’t really have hold significance to the greater picture whenever I'm talking about something. I'm all about the niche details! But then again, I really do think it’s important to go into detail on these things! Because, just with the small amount of information that Martin is an Xbox teen rather than a PlayStation or PC guy says more about him than you’d think. I'm just saying, I should know, considering I was one too! Where do you think I’ve gotten my propensity towards negativity and petty insults from? The Overwatch and Call of Duty lobbies, that's where! Anyway, the only reason why I haven’t upped this book to 5 stars (the most amount of stars, ever!) yet is because some of Haley and Martin’s opinions annoyed me. It wasn’t even the typical overly flowery YA "John Green" speak that bothered me, because all of that’s to be expected, but rather the fact that Martin’s celeb crush is Ryan Reynolds. Like, I’m sorry, but I’ve never heard of anybody legitimately attracted to that smarmy douchebag except for heterosexual men whose main social media is Reddit. Look, I’m well aware that none of this is rational criticism, I’m just yapping! Otherwise, I think it’s a foolish endeavor (I'm speaking like an Anime villain now) for a book to aim for being timeless and remain so against the passing years because they will always be colored by the social context in which it was written, but contemporary YA books get hit with this especially hard. Things like slang or popular trends can switch up in a manner of months, and something that feels so current can fall to the wayside as quickly as a Thanos snap. Can you imagine if I picked up a book where the hip thing the characters were doing was “planking”? That’d feel like being transported back to a different century! On that note, when I first read Tweet Cute by Emma Lord, I thought it was the most charming book I had ever seen, but I'm not so sure if I would feel the same way if I read it today considering the whole "tweeting as a business" angle considering how all the major food chains like Wendy’s or MacDonalds now have their own social media personalities where they try to be quirky and relatable to the masses on Twitter. "Omg isn't Denny's on Twitter just so~oo funny and witty!?" nah man, they're not.
Also, there’s a gross falseness to the way how all of advertising nowadays tries to hide the fact that they’re advertising. And yeah, I know I sound I’m going on a boomer ass, “the old days were better” rant right now, and the fact is that ads have always been made insidious and malicious intent, but I just feel like everything seems even more like a trick now, and I guess I’m just tired of every facet of life being some kind of marketing scheme. Where’s the authenticity!? Anybody remember that singer GAYLE? Oh wait, her stage name isn't stylized in all caps, so now it just seems like I'm yelling her name as if I'm Ganondorf and I've been cursed to be imprisoned for all of eternity in the Sacred Realm. Anyway, she made that song called “ABCDEFU” where she pretended like she created it naturally and organically by asking her TikTok fans what kind of song she should write, to which somebody gave her the genius idea to “write a song using the alphabet”! How fun and genuine, huh? So~oo authentic! Yeah well, internet detectives went on this “commenters” page, and guess what? They happened to be a PR manager at the label Gayle was signed to, so the whole “write a song off the cuff” story surrounding the origins of this shitty ass song was all a ploy to make the song seem more real and hardcore, but instead it was fake and corporate mandated to succeed. Gross. I don’t know, maybe that’s why I’m always so partial to historical-fiction, because while it’s a little sad, but I’ve become incredibly jaded to just about all aspects to Young-Adult books in general. In that sense, it’s really nice to read something that takes me back to a time when I was more than willing to dive head first into a book without needing to do hours of intense research or deep soul searching first. And f nothing else, I just really like Technically, You Started It because it never takes me more than a few hours of serious concentration to finish it. It always goes by so quickly. Sli~ide city, sli~ide city! Anyway, I guess what I’m really trying to say here is that sometimes the easiest way to create a story that remains universal and relevant is to focus on coming-of-age themes that everyone can relate to rather than trendy gimmicks. Maybe that’s why Technically, You Started It still holds up so well with me, because even though a romance naturally blooming over time between two people over one long text conversation is a rather modern take on the genre, at the end of the day, it’s still solely about two people connecting on a deeper level, regardless of whatever medium we see them communicate through. It’s a lovely thought, isn't it? And not to quote the master of doo-wop corny himself, Jason Mraz, but Technically, You Started It puts us fully in “I’m lucky I’m in love with my best friend” territory, and you know what? We don't really need to be anywhere else!
Talking to you miles away, from where I am / People may think low of me, who gives a damn boy / It’s just me and you~uu, a world for us two~oo.