This extraordinary guidebook offers a satisfying new approach to raising confident, healthy, whole human beings, from toddler to teen. Groundbreaking in both its scope and methodology, ParentShift challenges some of our most popular disciplinary tools ― including punishments, threats, bribery, and rewards ― all of which, science has shown, sabotage so many of the long-term goals we have for our kids. Child development experts Linda and Ty Hatfield, along with award-winning journalist and author Wendy Thomas Russell, dismantle the pervasive myths that have given rise to these tactics and introduce a method designed to solve virtually any household challenge while honoring children's emotional needs, preserving the parent-child relationship and strengthening each child's self-esteem.
Thank you to Netgallery and the publisher for sharing this book so I could review it.
ParentShift describes a new approach for parenting. Better parenting is possible without falling into the old and moldy categories of being controlling or permissive. This book shows you that there is a way to establish a relationship with your kids so that their education is about making the right choices for themselves, and not just following your rules. This approach promises to make the parent-child relationship strong, supportive, and understanding.
What I really liked about this book is that it gives you actual practical advice and tips. Also, it does not pretend that the Parentshift method is perfect, or that parents using the parentshift method will never make a mistake.
Totally recommended to parents and everybody that has interactions with children.
As a parent of a young toddler, I really appreciated this book and everything it had to offer. I can see many of these key points helping me in my journey as a parent to my lively little guy! I recommend to all parents needing a little extra guidance.
I received a copy of this book from NetGalley a few weeks ago and I thoroughly enjoyed it! As a bonus mom to a kid struggling with a bunch of different things, this book gave me some great insight into why certain behaviours occur, how to deal with (practically) and how I'm able to instil solid foundational values for my family to make their own choices.
I loved that the practical guidelines were exactly that, practical, and that having very real boundaries is still acceptable in today's parenting world.
I'd definitely recommend this book to anyone who wants to work on having a stronger parent-child relationship.
Reviewed by Rachel Dehning for Reader Views (12/19)
“ParentShift: Ten Universal Truths that Will Change the Way you Raise your Kids” by Linda and Ty Hatfield and Wendy Thomas Russell is one of the newest parenting books on the market. The reason for the book is explained by Russell and resonates with many- when she became a parent, she thought she had it all under control, little did she know that as her child grows, her parenting techniques that were applied at a younger age might not work so well anymore. When this happened, Russell sought the guidance of the Hatfield’s and learns their heart-centered approach to parenting in raising her child.
“ParentShift” is based on scientific facts geared toward how children’s brains are wired and how they respond to different parenting techniques. The acts of the controlling and permissive parents are discussed, then they are compared to the acts of the heart-centered parents, and the difference is obvious; it will leave you dumbfounded as to why you never thought to use this technique in the first place. Self-esteem, emotional needs, perception, motivation, responses, developmental stages, temperament, independence, limits and boundaries, and unmet needs are all issues that are explored and broken down in simple ways to be understood by all.
As a parent, I know how difficult parenting can be. By the end of the day you are tired and want your “me” time, but you still have a child that craves and demands your attention. Techniques and actions provided in the book have given me tips, hope, and alternatives to my parenting style. One of the biggest issues in parenting is respect. What is important is having the ability to step back and determine if you are speaking to your children the way you would like to be spoken to by another adult, or if you am belittling them and robbing them of a chance of making decisions and thinking on their own, both skills needed to become successful adults.
Other facts, such as the ten universal truths described in the book make total sense when they are written out, and show how if we, as parents, are able to change up our game plans, we can help our children feel unconditionally loved, needed, and able to develop high self-esteem and resilience for whatever lies in their future. I have already implemented some suggestions from the book, and I feel a better connection with my children. Their behavior has changed for the better as well. “ParentShift” is a definite must-read for all parents!
‘Parentshift’ is a interesting parenting self-help book for building strong and better relationships with your children. The book was really informative, easy to read and gave me plenty to think about, even though I've been a parent for over 17 years - there are always things you can learn about your parenting style and reflect on things you do or could change.
The book promotes a heart-centred method of parenting as many child-development educators recognise that there are three main parenting styles - often known as Goldilocks and the Three Parenting Styles. The first one is "too hard" so parents set unreasonably high expectations for their kids but give low emotional support (controlling); the second is "too soft" where parents set low expectations though then in turn offer high and unhealthy emotional support (permissive), and finally getting it "just right", where parents set reasonably high expectations but offer high and healthy emotional support (heart-centered).
The book provides great alternatives to those reward or punishment systems that have been peddled by many TV programmes and suggests many alternative and better common sense approaches to parenting which was backed up by research and examples were given throughout the book with enlightenment from other parents or research to back it up.
It also has useful appendices one of which provides ideas on what children should be managing for themselves split by age range.
I received this book from netgalley in return for a honest review.
As with many parenting books, this one has helped me out during the period I've been immersed in it. There is a lot of material packed into each page, and it is a nice combination of theory and application, i.e., they give solid background information on how people develop and recent science on the impact of different parenting methods, but they also give actionable strategies for how to approach issues that come up with one's own children. The only downside to ParentShift for me is that it will be hard to apply without carrying the book around and clicking pause on life to review a few chapters when problems arise. I laughed aloud towards the end when the authors say that they know that there's a lot of information to consider, but that this is okay because all you have to do is go through a set of 14 (!) questions each time you need to work through something with your child. Each of the 14 questions then has a list of its own, and those lists then refer to the "toolkits" that are sprinkled throughout the book. I'll never manage this level of adherence, but I still greatly appreciate the philosophy underscoring it all; namely, that we should attempt to identify and address our children's emotional needs in ways that lead to "win-win" outcomes for both parent and child on both the short and long term.
ParentShift is just the book I needed in this season of life. The authors carefully explain how to shift thinking from a punishment based disciplinary system to one where you the parent can really work to see your child as a human being, albeit younger and less experienced, and move from a system of control to mutual respect through positive reinforcement of behavior. Through personal experience, they share ten guidelines to help your child navigate life, from toddlerhood to teenager and to help prevent psychological problems later in life. I was really encouraged there was another way to parent, separate from methods such as timeouts and other punishment, that has proven success. ParentShift will be on my bookshelf for years to come.
This book is such a fantastic tool for developing the best relationship with your child while still maintaining boundaries and limits. There is an emphasis on collaboration with your child and helping them develop essential life skills. I like the way the book is set out and appreciated the real life examples of how to put the ideas and principles into practise. This work is such an important way forward in bringing up the next generation of healthy and mindful adults.
Refreshing! I feel like my husband and I were holding our own as parents, but this book encouraged us to do so much better. Parentshift clearly outlines why some trusted parenting strategies don't work and gives simple/usable techniques to use instead. I am no longer dreading disciplining my son, rather I look forward to building a mutually respectful relationship.
ParentShift: Ten Universal Truths That Will Change the Way You Raise Your Kids by Linda Hatfield has ways to collaborate with your child while keeping boundaries and limitations. It makes common sense and explains why some strategies do not work.
ParentShift offers a paradigm shift for parents looking for a different parenting style for raising kids. The authors looked at how American parents usually fall into two categories -- controlling or permissive. Controlling parents tend to set too many limits, place unreasonably high expectations, and fail to demonstrate enough empathy with their kids. Permissive parents go the other way by tending to be weak limit and boundary setters, expecting too little, and being empathetic to the fault of treating their children’s problems as their own.
This book teaches a distinct parenting style that the authors describe as heart-centered. Heart-centered parents set strong limits and boundaries, know how to genuinely empathize with their kids, and have high and reasonable expectations of them. The authors show how these skills are associated with children who are kind, confident, compassionate, capable, resilient, and healthy.
They also explain why most adults need to learn this parenting style because most were not raised in a heart-centered way themselves. That’s why they describe it as a paradigm shift and call the book ParentShift.
The book is structured as a practical guidebook, with explanations and common-sense exercises for how to apply the lessons in real life. It is not aimed at solving one particular problem or navigating one particular age. In fact, much of the book’s advice applies to getting along with adults as much as it does with parenting. ParentShift aims to help parents identify and address virtually any challenge at any age, although it probably would be most helpful for parents, grandparents, caregivers, and teachers of children around age three to five.
ParentShift is ahead of it's time and parents are catching up to this new way of parenting from their hearts. Any child expert or parent will want this book as a guide to a healthy and grounded style of parenting.
I downloaded this one as a library book and ended up buying it half way. Lots of good info that I know I’ll come back to! I would say a must read parenting book!