Finding Magic in the Mess: A Path to Greater Presence and More Joy, One Parenting Moment at a Time

by Steven Fonso

A supportive guide for busy parents who want to connect more and stress less.

In our stressed-out culture, too many parents are just coping rather than thriving, juggling demands on their time and energy, and tuning out their inner voices and deeper visions for family life in order to keep their heads above water. There is a better way.

Coaching parents through his holistic health practice, Dr. Steven Fonso has helped thousands of families reconnect with what matters most: slowing down to savor authentic moments of connection and letting go of the noise and stress that all too often get in the way.

In this reflective and heartfelt guide, you'll find insights and advice for bringing your best self to every parenting challenge, great and small, with greater awareness, authenticity, and grace. Topics include:


As calming as a talk with a dear friend, this deceptively simple book turns parenting "truths" upside down to reveal a path to greater presence and connection.

Genres: Parenting, Nonfiction

208 pages, Hardcover

Published July 23, 2019

Reviews

[Amelia]

Did this guy even raise his kids? Or ever interact with kids? Also, what’s this “cherish every moment” bull shit. No, I don’t have to cherish when I’m getting puked on, but I will remember the snuggles. Stop making moms feel like crap. There was a whole lot of judgement/advice from on high with ZERO real world application. And he definitely didn’t take into account any other situation other than a loving two parent household, possibly only a single earner (hello doctor author) who has a partner who stays home? But I guess you write what you know? Not helpful. One book I read that centered on mindfulness that had real world example and suggestions was called Raising Good Humans. Check that book out instead.

[Jevgenij]

"when you commit to having a child, you commit to a life of inconvenience"
"moving into a place of service <...> is a spiritual contract you made with your child"
For those phrases alone this book deserves one-star max. It also is full of _very_ abstract and generic phrases, lacks any meaningful examples and is generously seasoned with spiritual garbage.

[Angela]

Some good things to consider. Somethings felt like criticism if you parent that way.

[Cris]

This is one of the craziest and worst parenting “help” guides I have heard! The one part said we aren’t suppose to tell our children to say thank you for a gift. WTH! If we don’t teach our children manners then we will have a generation of rude children, oh wait, we are half way there! One of his other comments was when we say I love you, we should never expect to hear it back. Ok, I don’t know about you, but I like to know the person I spoke to heard me? Thank you notes? I don’t give gifts expecting thank you’d , but it’s a matter of respect! If you don’t thank someone how do they even know you received the gift? So he wants us as parents and grandparents to allow children to run free so we can be less stressed? I’m sorry, when you become a parent it’s your job to raise the child(ren) to become the best adult they can! This is your obligation, your duty! It’s not an option for you, it’s a requirement!

[Zach Freeman]

Kind of a disconnected collection of generic platitudes more than any kind of solid guide or information but a good reminder nonetheless.

[Tracie]

I began to read this thinking I could use well-rounded parenting advice, we all need reminders, and in an effort to read more non-fiction books. Early on, while there were some red flags, I wanted to remain opened minded. I still thought, “Oh, okay, this may be useful… that is a lovely tip… yes, that’s the right mindset.” But as the book went on, the author became more and more unhinged.
Who is his target audience? Telling parents to just relax, not giving them the tools to do it, and then asking if they do yoga? Come on.
I should have known on page 75 when he suggested that everything that is meant to be will be and that everything happens for a reason.
I should have known when he told the reader that if they aren’t laughing, they are too serious, and that laughter “allows energy to flow freely, liberating compression and contraction into flow and ease,” (p. 81.)
I should have known when the author continued to insinuate that the reader’s parents didn’t raise them right. Not joking, this happened a lot. (Seriously, Fonso, wtf.)
But I was certain by the chapter where he told moms they are not sacrificing enough if they don’t breastfeed, because that’s what he feels is best for the baby.
I knew by the “they will learn,” and hand washing chapters. We just went though a pandemic, ffs.

This guy is off it.

Try telling a sleep-deprived, working mom with a child in the middle of a meltdown while she’s trying to fix dinner to just relax and smile more, or just any mom or parent for that matter. Yeah, that’s going to go over well.

Who allowed this into publication?

[Alexandra Leigh]

This didnt really resonate with me. Its more of a self help book then parenting, does have some good insights like be present with kids and embrace their laughter but has strange tips like dont tell thek to wash their hands, but rather embrace the dirt, which to me when ykur kids have had worms then youd encourage hand washing, also says dont get them to say thank you unless they say it where i instill manners and teach my jids using manners comes across nice and helps get you what your after. I think while some points are valid some are very different i still think kids need guidance from parents beyond what thus suggests

[Margo]

It was alright and had some very key points, but gratitude attitude versus manners kind of threw me a little. I think there are a lot of valid points in here to consider though. Children who are taught to say thank you are not wrong or robotic, they are growing up to be kind, or at least that is they way I perceive it. Maybe as you read, pull it apart the way you would like to parent your child, and discuss with others you trust, what that will look like....

[Amrita Gudral]

A lovely book on parenting, insights of little details we already know as human beings but tend to forget in this chaotic schedule of life ... it’s a good repetition and reminder of all the things we do unconsciously and put it in check .... and most importantly points on self love !

[Kari Napier]

I wasn't sure how much I would like this book based on reviews and the star rating. However, you can not always go by what others say. Especially in self help type books, as each book hits each person differently. I really liked this one.

[Ashley Berry]

This is a great book that makes you evaluate and help support and guidance to for busy parents who want to learn to connect with your kids and in life more and stress less.

[Sara Kinder]

Easy and quick read. Several good reminders about being present and things to think about as parents.

[Amanda]

5 stars because I love the concept and 3 stars for reality.

[Rob Blaesser]

Positively unreadable

[Shayla Steger]

“Once you have the ability to accept that you have no control over others and their behavior, only then will you be free”

“At every moment there are infinite possible choices”

[David Pesci]

despite being a chiropractor, still has good insights

[Taylor Tollafield]

🎧