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Sober Curious Lib/E: The Blissful Sleep, Greater Focus, Limitless Presence, and Deep Connection Awaiting Us All on the Other Side of Alcohol
Would life be better without alcohol?
It’s the nagging question more and more of us are finding harder to ignore, whether we have a “problem” with alcohol or not. After all, we yoga. We green juice. We meditate. We self-care. And yet, come the end of a long work day, the start of a weekend, an awkward social situation, we drink. One glass of wine turns into two turns into a bottle. In the face of how we care for ourselves otherwise, it’s hard to avoid how alcohol really makes us feel… terrible.
How different would our lives be if we stopped drinking on autopilot? If we stopped drinking altogether? Really different, it turns out. Really better. Frank, funny, and always judgment free, Sober Curious is a bold guide to choosing to live hangover-free, from Ruby Warrington, one of the leading voices of the new sobriety movement.
Drawing on research, expert interviews, and personal narrative, Sober Curious is a radical take down of the myths that keep so many of us drinking. Inspiring, timely, and blame free, Sober Curious is both conversation starter and handbook—essential reading that empowers readers to transform their relationship with alcohol, so we can lead our most fulfilling lives.
It’s the nagging question more and more of us are finding harder to ignore, whether we have a “problem” with alcohol or not. After all, we yoga. We green juice. We meditate. We self-care. And yet, come the end of a long work day, the start of a weekend, an awkward social situation, we drink. One glass of wine turns into two turns into a bottle. In the face of how we care for ourselves otherwise, it’s hard to avoid how alcohol really makes us feel… terrible.
How different would our lives be if we stopped drinking on autopilot? If we stopped drinking altogether? Really different, it turns out. Really better. Frank, funny, and always judgment free, Sober Curious is a bold guide to choosing to live hangover-free, from Ruby Warrington, one of the leading voices of the new sobriety movement.
Drawing on research, expert interviews, and personal narrative, Sober Curious is a radical take down of the myths that keep so many of us drinking. Inspiring, timely, and blame free, Sober Curious is both conversation starter and handbook—essential reading that empowers readers to transform their relationship with alcohol, so we can lead our most fulfilling lives.
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First published December 31, 2018
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About the author
Ruby Warrington
6 books136 followersRuby Warrington is a lifestyle writer and former features editor of the UK's Sunday Times Style supplement. In 2013, she created The Numinous, an online magazine that bridges the gap between the mystical and the mainstream. She is also cofounder of Moon Club, an online mentoring program for spiritual activists, and "sober curious" event series Club SODA NYC. She now lives in New York City with her husband, Simon (a.k.a "the Pisces").
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 469 reviews
March 20, 2019
2.5 stars rounded down. I read an article by this author in a Sunday supplement about giving up drinking, which inspired me to go teetotal myself and to buy this book. Although the book contains some good insights into why and how we use alcohol, and offers some handy hints for living without alcohol, the overall tone and the writing style grated so much that it was almost impossible for me to see past that. The author used to write "lifestyle" features for a magazine, so this perhaps partly explains the writing style and the "bittiness" of the book. It was also insufferably smug, pretentious and woowoo at times, to the point where I spent large parts of the book alternately grinding my teeth together or sighing heavily. Here's a handy hint from me - avoid the chapter called "Getting High On My Own Supply" at all costs if you have a low tolerance for all things Hipster and New Age (or "Now Age" as the author insists on renaming it). One of the quotes on the cover mentions it offering "practical strategies". Yes - but only if you inhabit the same privileged, liberal, white, educated and middle class world as the author. An author who also counts among her friends a "Haitian Vodoun priestess and root worker". Here's an extract that gives you an idea of what I mean about the writing style (which caused much merriment when I read it aloud to my daughter) - "Another reason I think the Pisces has rediscovered DJ-ing as part of his Sober Curiosity is that the sonic journey satisfied the part of him ... that used to use booze to transcend the earthly realms". Deathless prose, I'm sure you agree! She also likes to use the expression "Thank Goddess" and to use italics at least once on every single page. I rest my case ... I think I'm being so harsh mainly out of frustration, as I really wanted to like this book, it had some really excellent and inspiring insights to offer, and partly thanks to Ruby's original article, I am in my sixth week without alcohol.
January 17, 2019
With the all the references to Brene Brown, I kind of wished Brene Brown was writing it.
February 28, 2019
Several years ago I made some big changes in the areas of diet and exercise. The program I started with involved cutting out alcohol. After I was done with a program, I found that drinking had lost its appeal. I have always loved a good drink...or two. But now I simply don't feel good when I drink alcohol and it is no longer enjoyable for me. I've been curious about what may have happened physically and/or mentally during that long layoff.
The title of this book intrigued me and, after flipping through it, I decided to check it out of the local library. It appeared that Warrington was addressing the questions I had.
I wanted to like this book. I really did. But I found it to be a rambling mess of anecdotes, random and obvious "how to" lists, and weak science. I think that my age and gender didn't help either. As a 53-year-old man, I did not connect with her personal story at all. The author struck me as an extremely bright but immature person in need of an editor. With a few more rewrites and edits, this could have been a very good book. However, as I said, that could just be me. I see a lot of very positive reviews by mostly young women.
The title of this book intrigued me and, after flipping through it, I decided to check it out of the local library. It appeared that Warrington was addressing the questions I had.
I wanted to like this book. I really did. But I found it to be a rambling mess of anecdotes, random and obvious "how to" lists, and weak science. I think that my age and gender didn't help either. As a 53-year-old man, I did not connect with her personal story at all. The author struck me as an extremely bright but immature person in need of an editor. With a few more rewrites and edits, this could have been a very good book. However, as I said, that could just be me. I see a lot of very positive reviews by mostly young women.
November 6, 2019
I read through this entire book rolling my eyes—some parts I found minimally enjoyable and other parts useful. I appreciate her encouraging folks to get curious about their experiences but came to the conclusion that you could find her advice in ANY OTHER self help book. What I couldn’t ignore was the classism, racism, and anti-sexwork(er) sentiment that ran undercurrent (meaning indirect, meaning covert) throughout this book. A ww saying “hey I know I’m a wealthy ww and that i struggle SIGNIFICANTLY less then most other people”...is performative trash & that is exactly what RW did multiple times in order to act as though it’s a ticket to escape true accountability for her privilege. Almost every single person she referenced was a fellow wealthy wyt New Yorker, this woman didn’t even go out of her way to look beyond her rich person bubble to make this book applicable to the people on the ground, struggling with complexity & trauma & lives that look nothing like hers. And she claims that meditation is free...but her own sober curios meditation retreat costs 300 fucking dollars! (For a weekend!! Lol) So people can meditate alone but they’ve gotta have money to be in your community, huh ruby warrington? Pls change the title of this faulty & badly written book to reflect that this was made by and for rich wyt folks—not “us all” cause I know for CERTAIN it wasn’t written with me in mind. Y’all can keep it.
April 5, 2019
If you find yourself reading this book I think it's safe to say you want to/wish you/already do drink less and you're curious about this title. That's me. Someone who has realized that even casual drinking, that almost never results in getting sloppy or hangovers, just isn't fun anymore. And maybe never was.
For those reasons, the book starts out great and really jives with what I'm already thinking. I appreciate the realization that I am not the only person out there who thinks booze sucks. Who struggles with FOMA (fear of missing alcohol) when you see a glass of wine on a sunny patio at a cafe, but stillllll you know it sucks. It doesn't fulfill. And HEY, that is OK! Okay, so all those kinds of ideas and themes are hit on in the first 40%ish of the book and for that I give this book a thumbs up, solid 3 stars. The positives are the big take away that YOU CAN DECIDE WHAT YOU DO with yourself and your body in relation to booze (this is said with great trepidation and not directed toward people suffering from addiction or alcoholism). But for the person who just kinda thinks alcohol sucks and doesn't struggle with it beyond a bad habit, like eating too much sometimes, it is a really worthwhile concept that you can decide how you consume it and live your life. You can spend time with friends and family and go out and not imbibe AND feel better for it.
But the topic, perhaps naturally, evolves in to what you could be/should be doing instead of drinking and maybe that is totally OK for a self-help type book. There is nothing wrong with suggesting mediation, or yoga, or crafting or anything else to occupy yourself, to help you be more fulfilled or present or creative. Nothing wrong with that. But that has quickly become ALL that this book is about, rather than what I think the original topic intended to be (or seems it should be based on the title .... but maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I just want to read about the evils of alcohol rather than living in the healthy after). So lets be clear AF here. I am a white priv woman. Living in a very white priv world. I GO TO YOGA almost daily. I live in Cali. I drink Kombucha. I have dabbled in meditation. I literally CAN go float in the ocean (as she suggests) if I want. But as this book began to wrap up I found it insulting. What about the person, who cares their skin color or priv or whatever, who cannot afford yoga, or doesn't have access to it, who doesn't live on a freaking ocean, who doesn't know what the heck a sound bath is and can't access one for 3000 miles if they wanted to. I sat here realizing how lucky I am that I already have a deep yoga practice and the thought of deepening my mediation practice isn't that scary. But this is so particular and specific and in most cases expensive.
This book made me feel shitty relief (thank god I'm not the other guy), WELL THANK GOD I'M ALREADY A FULL BLOODED CALIFORNIAN. Like PHEW, I'm in the clear. I do yoga so a leap to daily mediation isn't crazy! I'm free, healthy, safe! I can defeat the urge to drink because it doesn't bring me joy! BUT WHAT ABOUT EVERYONE ELSE? Does this make sense? Am I getting wrapped up in the wrong thing?? Again, nothing wrong with suggesting things to do instead of drinking. Nothing. There is lots of free yoga on you tube people can try (assuming, which we shouldn't, that everyone has an internet connection and a phone or computer and so on) ..... Okay, so whats my problem. I guess the specificity and type of suggestions are so freaking upper class trendy magazine headline, that even I, a super white priv woman, is aware of how insulting it is to a lot of people, and not just the extremely impoverished.
She seriously suggests sound baths, superfoods, shambalic something or others and floating in the ocean. OK, NO PROB. Let me go to my local spot in my local ocean. Is anyone else irritated by this?? I was really excited to see this idea being talked about, that alcohol is actually really ludicrous and the fact that its socially acceptable is insane and why do we all succumb to it, so many of us deeply hate it. But it's turned in to a super yuppie new age lifestyle guru book. My sentences don't make sense anymore but I THINK my point has been made. For all that crap, its a 1 star book. So 3 stars for the actual alcohol discussion, 1 star for new age B.S. = 2 star over all.
For those reasons, the book starts out great and really jives with what I'm already thinking. I appreciate the realization that I am not the only person out there who thinks booze sucks. Who struggles with FOMA (fear of missing alcohol) when you see a glass of wine on a sunny patio at a cafe, but stillllll you know it sucks. It doesn't fulfill. And HEY, that is OK! Okay, so all those kinds of ideas and themes are hit on in the first 40%ish of the book and for that I give this book a thumbs up, solid 3 stars. The positives are the big take away that YOU CAN DECIDE WHAT YOU DO with yourself and your body in relation to booze (this is said with great trepidation and not directed toward people suffering from addiction or alcoholism). But for the person who just kinda thinks alcohol sucks and doesn't struggle with it beyond a bad habit, like eating too much sometimes, it is a really worthwhile concept that you can decide how you consume it and live your life. You can spend time with friends and family and go out and not imbibe AND feel better for it.
But the topic, perhaps naturally, evolves in to what you could be/should be doing instead of drinking and maybe that is totally OK for a self-help type book. There is nothing wrong with suggesting mediation, or yoga, or crafting or anything else to occupy yourself, to help you be more fulfilled or present or creative. Nothing wrong with that. But that has quickly become ALL that this book is about, rather than what I think the original topic intended to be (or seems it should be based on the title .... but maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I just want to read about the evils of alcohol rather than living in the healthy after). So lets be clear AF here. I am a white priv woman. Living in a very white priv world. I GO TO YOGA almost daily. I live in Cali. I drink Kombucha. I have dabbled in meditation. I literally CAN go float in the ocean (as she suggests) if I want. But as this book began to wrap up I found it insulting. What about the person, who cares their skin color or priv or whatever, who cannot afford yoga, or doesn't have access to it, who doesn't live on a freaking ocean, who doesn't know what the heck a sound bath is and can't access one for 3000 miles if they wanted to. I sat here realizing how lucky I am that I already have a deep yoga practice and the thought of deepening my mediation practice isn't that scary. But this is so particular and specific and in most cases expensive.
This book made me feel shitty relief (thank god I'm not the other guy), WELL THANK GOD I'M ALREADY A FULL BLOODED CALIFORNIAN. Like PHEW, I'm in the clear. I do yoga so a leap to daily mediation isn't crazy! I'm free, healthy, safe! I can defeat the urge to drink because it doesn't bring me joy! BUT WHAT ABOUT EVERYONE ELSE? Does this make sense? Am I getting wrapped up in the wrong thing?? Again, nothing wrong with suggesting things to do instead of drinking. Nothing. There is lots of free yoga on you tube people can try (assuming, which we shouldn't, that everyone has an internet connection and a phone or computer and so on) ..... Okay, so whats my problem. I guess the specificity and type of suggestions are so freaking upper class trendy magazine headline, that even I, a super white priv woman, is aware of how insulting it is to a lot of people, and not just the extremely impoverished.
She seriously suggests sound baths, superfoods, shambalic something or others and floating in the ocean. OK, NO PROB. Let me go to my local spot in my local ocean. Is anyone else irritated by this?? I was really excited to see this idea being talked about, that alcohol is actually really ludicrous and the fact that its socially acceptable is insane and why do we all succumb to it, so many of us deeply hate it. But it's turned in to a super yuppie new age lifestyle guru book. My sentences don't make sense anymore but I THINK my point has been made. For all that crap, its a 1 star book. So 3 stars for the actual alcohol discussion, 1 star for new age B.S. = 2 star over all.
January 7, 2019
This book is a must read for anyone who drinks, even if alcohol isn't an issue in your life. Warrington offers fresh insights and questions into why we turn to alcohol in the first place, what role it plays in our lives and challenges us to get on board with the notion that we already have everything we need inside us and that alcohol actually doesn't give us the things we look for in it but in actuality, alcohol does the opposite. Instead of focusing on all the reasons we shouldn't be drinking (there are many), Warrington focuses on the joy and magic to be found in sobriety!
January 14, 2019
A soccer mom's guide to alcohol issues. Some good insight for those not sick enough for AA, but really... "just order dessert instead!" and other surface-level suggestions make this one long Chatelaine article. If you want a good read regarding recovery for those that question AA, pick up the critic's favourite of 2018, The Recovering.
January 9, 2019
7th book for 2019.
Sober Curious refers to people who are not alcoholics, for who taking an AA oath of lifelong abstinence would feel false, but who do want to explore the potential joys of living without alcohol for extended periods of time.
Warrington, a former journalist who has worked in both London and NYC, knows the alcohol fueled lifestyle, puts forward a good argument for the virtues of a Sober Curious lifestyle and offers many useful suggestions for how to navigate this choice. Warrington does stray at times into an uncomfortably New Age tone, but this is pretty minimal and easy enough to pass over for those allergic to this sort of thing. The book lacks any discussion around the science of drinking, which I found personally found disappointing, but that is perhaps for a different sort of book.
3-stars.
Sober Curious refers to people who are not alcoholics, for who taking an AA oath of lifelong abstinence would feel false, but who do want to explore the potential joys of living without alcohol for extended periods of time.
Warrington, a former journalist who has worked in both London and NYC, knows the alcohol fueled lifestyle, puts forward a good argument for the virtues of a Sober Curious lifestyle and offers many useful suggestions for how to navigate this choice. Warrington does stray at times into an uncomfortably New Age tone, but this is pretty minimal and easy enough to pass over for those allergic to this sort of thing. The book lacks any discussion around the science of drinking, which I found personally found disappointing, but that is perhaps for a different sort of book.
3-stars.
May 3, 2023
This resonated with me a bit more than Quit Like a Woman: The Radical Choice to Not Drink in a Culture Obsessed with Alcohol. It's geared towards the same audience but a bit less...in your face about it? I guess that's the difference between "sober sober" and "sober curious," as Ruby puts it. I felt pretty guilty and ashamed after going back to drinking after reading Holly's book. After reading Ruby's book, I'm trying to treat my night out last week as just a data point. Make your sober stints longer and longer and the rest will take care of itself.
Kinda. What really happens is you become interested in figuring out the rest of it. Like what I really need to do, which is figure out meditation and/or yoga. That seems to be the missing piece, but I will come up with literally any excuse not to do either one of them.
I can even see myself rereading this one. A lot of it resonated with me, from the amount I drink to the distractions I choose - and even worse, why I choose them.
Kinda. What really happens is you become interested in figuring out the rest of it. Like what I really need to do, which is figure out meditation and/or yoga. That seems to be the missing piece, but I will come up with literally any excuse not to do either one of them.
I can even see myself rereading this one. A lot of it resonated with me, from the amount I drink to the distractions I choose - and even worse, why I choose them.
January 11, 2021
I was surprised and inspired by how Ruby connected being "sober curious" to activism. As someone trying to meditate more and sit in my own discomfort and fully feel, this book encouraged me to take a deeper dive into this way of life by being "sober curious", which also involves letting go of the stress of being "perfect". An easy read, but deep, not-so-easy personal thoughts and reflections are brought to the surface... which I love!
August 7, 2023
2.5 Stars- I found out about this book because it was referenced on a few podcasts I listened to. I like books that explain information about alcohol because as the older I get, I’m finding it harder to metabolize, sleep or feel healthy after having drinks. This book has a few good insights about how and why people drink alcohol. But overall the author really annoyed me and spent most of the book preaching “how to” live like her. But then she also wasn’t transparent about her own alcohol journey and said it was none of our business😆. I do not recommend this book. If you ever want to learn more about alcohol, I loved the book Alcohol Explained by William Porter, which was super informative without being condescending like this author.
April 24, 2025
DNF at about 50%. I could not take the writing anymore. So much italics, "quotation marks", inspirational quotes, bloated sentences, et cetera.. I wanted to like the book, as the message is important, but during the spirituality chapter I really had to check out. There are some statements that are definitely not scientifically proven, but "facts" presented by "experts" (For example: crafting has a similar effect to your brain as alcohol. What?). Back to the little free library this goes..
February 13, 2025
As someone who has never drunk alcohol, this was an interesting glimpse into the effects of moderate-to-heavy social drinking and the myriad positive changes that being "sober curious" can bring. However, about halfway through, the book started to seem redundant, and I was relieved to finally finish it. If it had been half the length, it would have been more enjoyable. Note: the author spends some time delving into moon rituals, energy vibrations, root work, and other "Now Age" (as she terms it) strategies.
August 20, 2024
I didn’t want to like this (for obvious reasons haha love a wine).
A little woo woo in parts (Ruby is a keen astrologer who leant in to her “spirituality” to fill the alcohol void). I liked that she believes there is still a place for “positive” or “mindful” drinking.
Her assessment of the reasons why we drink is interesting, in particular, to quieten social unease in a society that elevates boisterous, confident personality types.
A little woo woo in parts (Ruby is a keen astrologer who leant in to her “spirituality” to fill the alcohol void). I liked that she believes there is still a place for “positive” or “mindful” drinking.
Her assessment of the reasons why we drink is interesting, in particular, to quieten social unease in a society that elevates boisterous, confident personality types.
November 13, 2021
I picked this book up at the library because I know that alcohol is bad for me and was hoping this book might help me along in that journey. However, I did not relate to this author's experiences at all.
Her reasons for drinking just aren't mine. I don't use alcohol as a way to unwind. I often already do drink something non-alcoholic for my first round. I'm not scared to meet new people totally sober. This is just not my reasons for drinking alcohol. I like trying new things (and there's always a new craft beer or cocktail you've never tried) and I like the communal experience of drinking. These are not things that were addressed.
She seems really hung up on what people think of her when she's drinking and when she's not drinking and really hung up on her own judgements of others' drinking habits. You can only remind people so many times not to judge others for drinking before it really seems like you want to judge others.
This book also totally lacked actual, scientific information on what alcohol does to your body, to your relationships, to society, etc. Instead, the author focuses on how quitting alcohol can help heal your spirituality and other new age, whole body health concepts. Which I'm sorry, but that's not good enough for me. Talk me through the reality of liver cirrhosis and maybe I'd feel more compelled to drink less. Also, as someone not particularly prone to hangovers, her whole thing about how your body "knows" you shouldn't drink didn't really hit home.
All of this together, I probably still would have given the book two stars because it was easy to read (if a little too on the conversational and smug side of things) and I thought the selection of "alternatives" was pretty good. However, Warrington did my least favourite thing non-fiction authors do:
She cited a news article discussing a scientific study instead of citing the study directly. There is no quicker way to convince me that you have not done your research. This book is lazy and unconvincing.
Edit: found the study the article was citing and it turns out that it didn't say the thing she cited it for. Yes, I feel vindicated by this. As I said, lazy.
Her reasons for drinking just aren't mine. I don't use alcohol as a way to unwind. I often already do drink something non-alcoholic for my first round. I'm not scared to meet new people totally sober. This is just not my reasons for drinking alcohol. I like trying new things (and there's always a new craft beer or cocktail you've never tried) and I like the communal experience of drinking. These are not things that were addressed.
She seems really hung up on what people think of her when she's drinking and when she's not drinking and really hung up on her own judgements of others' drinking habits. You can only remind people so many times not to judge others for drinking before it really seems like you want to judge others.
This book also totally lacked actual, scientific information on what alcohol does to your body, to your relationships, to society, etc. Instead, the author focuses on how quitting alcohol can help heal your spirituality and other new age, whole body health concepts. Which I'm sorry, but that's not good enough for me. Talk me through the reality of liver cirrhosis and maybe I'd feel more compelled to drink less. Also, as someone not particularly prone to hangovers, her whole thing about how your body "knows" you shouldn't drink didn't really hit home.
All of this together, I probably still would have given the book two stars because it was easy to read (if a little too on the conversational and smug side of things) and I thought the selection of "alternatives" was pretty good. However, Warrington did my least favourite thing non-fiction authors do:
She cited a news article discussing a scientific study instead of citing the study directly. There is no quicker way to convince me that you have not done your research. This book is lazy and unconvincing.
Edit: found the study the article was citing and it turns out that it didn't say the thing she cited it for. Yes, I feel vindicated by this. As I said, lazy.
October 25, 2019
I've been reading a lot of articles about the "sober curious," movement and thought I'd do a little dive into a book on it too. I listened to this one on audiobook and was excited to learn better habits for unwinding and more about Warrington's own journey to sobriety.
Warrington writes very honestly about her struggles with alcohol that lead her to the decision to cut it out of her life. She shares some of her favorite side effects from quitting booze, like better sleep, more energy, and deeper connections with those around her.
The idea of sober curiosity is, certainly, a different avenue of sobriety than committing to an AA program. I think it is a great exploration for people that don't necessarily have an unhealthy relationship with alcohol, but want to live a mindful life. I can see how the movement can feel a bit controversial for people who struggle with alcohol addiction because abstaining is the best solution.
Overall, it was an interesting read, but I thought the book would offer more takeaways or a step-by-step process. This seems to focus more on Warrington's own benefits that she experienced rather than giving readers an actionable plan for curiously seeking sobriety.
Warrington writes very honestly about her struggles with alcohol that lead her to the decision to cut it out of her life. She shares some of her favorite side effects from quitting booze, like better sleep, more energy, and deeper connections with those around her.
The idea of sober curiosity is, certainly, a different avenue of sobriety than committing to an AA program. I think it is a great exploration for people that don't necessarily have an unhealthy relationship with alcohol, but want to live a mindful life. I can see how the movement can feel a bit controversial for people who struggle with alcohol addiction because abstaining is the best solution.
Overall, it was an interesting read, but I thought the book would offer more takeaways or a step-by-step process. This seems to focus more on Warrington's own benefits that she experienced rather than giving readers an actionable plan for curiously seeking sobriety.
January 25, 2020
I liked it. I find Ruby Warrington’s style of woo pretty endearing and I liked her tone and writing style. I liked the tips in here too. I want to make alcohol free unicorn shots.
January 19, 2023
well! i’m conflicted with this read to be honest. with the amount of times she repeated herself or said “but, we will get more into this later…” it could have been an article and not a book tbh.
i have been considering the idea of being sober-ish for a while…simply because i don’t really enjoy drinking & dont indulge much.
i found the author to be a bit self-obsessed and not super self-aware? she would share her stories of binge drinking and blackout drinking while saying her alcohol behaviors were normal or average.
i would consider my consumption to be pretty moderate (less than 7 drinks a week), i rarely get hungover but can also feel hungover even when i don’t drink or have a single glass of wine. AKA i’m just DEHYDRATED - so the idea of a hangover free life just doesn’t solely feel like an alcohol free mission.
so much of this book i struggled to resonate with or fit my own experience into while also simultaneously feeling shamed.
however, i do think that reading this book and just THINKING more about drinking has helped me to consider and think about why i drink and how i feel while drinking more - so maybe it did it’s job. i do plan on seeing if i can be sober from alcohol for a while to see if i truly do sleep better & find that glow.
overall this book was a wild ride in was just ready to be done with - i echo some other reviews and wish this book concept was written by someone else…possibly considering reading another sober exploratory book to continue thinking more on this topic - any suggestions??!
i have been considering the idea of being sober-ish for a while…simply because i don’t really enjoy drinking & dont indulge much.
i found the author to be a bit self-obsessed and not super self-aware? she would share her stories of binge drinking and blackout drinking while saying her alcohol behaviors were normal or average.
i would consider my consumption to be pretty moderate (less than 7 drinks a week), i rarely get hungover but can also feel hungover even when i don’t drink or have a single glass of wine. AKA i’m just DEHYDRATED - so the idea of a hangover free life just doesn’t solely feel like an alcohol free mission.
so much of this book i struggled to resonate with or fit my own experience into while also simultaneously feeling shamed.
however, i do think that reading this book and just THINKING more about drinking has helped me to consider and think about why i drink and how i feel while drinking more - so maybe it did it’s job. i do plan on seeing if i can be sober from alcohol for a while to see if i truly do sleep better & find that glow.
overall this book was a wild ride in was just ready to be done with - i echo some other reviews and wish this book concept was written by someone else…possibly considering reading another sober exploratory book to continue thinking more on this topic - any suggestions??!
September 24, 2024
I have somewhat mixed feelings… I started reading the book because the concept of sober curiosity is very interesting to me. The author initially describes it as something personal and individual — there doesn’t need to be a strict set of rules within sober curiosity. You can have drinks here and there, without any fear of breaking a rule because you are who creates them. But then, she just gives you an endless list of actual rules that are like “if you drink alcohol you will probably drop dead.” I think it’s a bit dramatic and like Graciela said she speaks like she is above everyone and everything… which is weird. The concept is still very intriguing and I think important, deconstructing the shame of not wanting to drink in social settings or at all.
May 22, 2024
Some interesting thoughts on why we drink, and some useful tips on how to not drink if you don’t want to, but overall, this was a bit too new agey for me.
November 30, 2025
Casi DNF para mi. Elegí este libro después de haber dejado de tomar por 6 meses porque me gusta la idea de tener una relación distinta con el alcohol sin dejarlo del todo. El libro empezó bastante bien, y tuvo algunas reflexiones que me parecieron interesantes, PERO después fue desviándose del tema, me empezó a resultar excesivamente auto-referencial (con experiencias que me parecían medio boludas) y a mechar pseudociencias que la verdad no son mi ~cup of tea~ (#VibrarAlto).
Al final hay una reflexión sobre sus privilegios que me resultó rarísima, y me empezó a cerrar más cuando leí otras reviews desde otras perspectivas que señalaban su clasismo a la hora de sugerir soluciones para las relaciones problemáticas con el alcohol. Me quedo con algunas cositas del comienzo sobre el FOMA (fear of missing alcohol), y en que una vida sin (o con menos) alcohol es una vida más plena, pero honestamente podría haber leído un artículo y listo.
Al final hay una reflexión sobre sus privilegios que me resultó rarísima, y me empezó a cerrar más cuando leí otras reviews desde otras perspectivas que señalaban su clasismo a la hora de sugerir soluciones para las relaciones problemáticas con el alcohol. Me quedo con algunas cositas del comienzo sobre el FOMA (fear of missing alcohol), y en que una vida sin (o con menos) alcohol es una vida más plena, pero honestamente podría haber leído un artículo y listo.
September 20, 2024
I recommend reading the first three and then the last chapter. Everything else is just regurgitation of what was already said.
April 1, 2021
Made me feel great about decision to quit drinking.
Read
February 3, 2024Very interesting, I came to realize I pretty much already subscribe to a “sober curious” lifestyle.. however, this book gave me the confidence to realize that it is actually waaay cool and beneficial for my health, so it empowered me to feel less self conscious about the friends who make me feel bad for turning down a drink (and learning that they probs aren’t that great of friends anyways if they make me feel like that)
October 9, 2019
Ah, well, what to say of this book?
If nothing else, it was validating to know that there are a whole host of people out there wondering what a completely alcohol-free existence might look like. Drinking is so embedded into the fabric of our lives that to leave it behind for any reason, save life-ruining addiction, seems almost a revolutionary act. Or at very least highly unconventional. Discovering that there are other sober curious folk out there has fed the fire to continue pondering, and perhaps eventually embracing, this "unusual" life choice. (Also, it should be noted that there's been a recent and drastic spike in NA beer offerings, which leads me to surmise that sober curiosity may be on the rise.)
As others have said, the book is somewhat meandering and towards the end gets into a weird tone/pace that was rather offputting. I'm actually pretty open-minded about woo woo stuff, but all the talk of "high-vibes," and other pop spirituality phrases and ideas were a bit much for me. There's not much substance (puns!), but enough motivational energy to make this a decent enough read (tho I struggled to make it through the last fifty pages). It's a good 101 for anyone wanting to explore the possibilities of a sober curious lifestyle, but I'm excited to continue both my research and soul-searching with some richer, more well-thought-out literature. On to the next one!
If nothing else, it was validating to know that there are a whole host of people out there wondering what a completely alcohol-free existence might look like. Drinking is so embedded into the fabric of our lives that to leave it behind for any reason, save life-ruining addiction, seems almost a revolutionary act. Or at very least highly unconventional. Discovering that there are other sober curious folk out there has fed the fire to continue pondering, and perhaps eventually embracing, this "unusual" life choice. (Also, it should be noted that there's been a recent and drastic spike in NA beer offerings, which leads me to surmise that sober curiosity may be on the rise.)
As others have said, the book is somewhat meandering and towards the end gets into a weird tone/pace that was rather offputting. I'm actually pretty open-minded about woo woo stuff, but all the talk of "high-vibes," and other pop spirituality phrases and ideas were a bit much for me. There's not much substance (puns!), but enough motivational energy to make this a decent enough read (tho I struggled to make it through the last fifty pages). It's a good 101 for anyone wanting to explore the possibilities of a sober curious lifestyle, but I'm excited to continue both my research and soul-searching with some richer, more well-thought-out literature. On to the next one!
January 17, 2019
I love, like, admire and adore Ruby Warrington! I listened to Material Girl, Mystical World as an audiobook in my car, and it was honestly like I had a new best friend, chatting about Everything I love and think about. It was AMAZE!
Imagine my excitement when my new BFF published a book about being Sober Curious! OMG we are truly on the exact same LIFE PAGE!
Well, I liked it, alot. But just 4 stars. And that's my personal experience, just where I am right now.
I am about 13 weeks down the road of being Sober Curious, into what Ruby would now call Sober-Sober. Maybe, I think I needed this book between 15 and 10 weeks ago.
She is awesome, and this book is AWESOME for any THINKING of trying it and feeling insanely good!
One of my favorite quotes on page 10 was about 'Why are the only people not drinking the ones who 'can't'? Its such a part of our culture, we hardly question it.
IT'S TIME TO QUESTION IT and join the movement of SERIOUS SELF LOVE! you go girl, you are still my secret author Bff.
Imagine my excitement when my new BFF published a book about being Sober Curious! OMG we are truly on the exact same LIFE PAGE!
Well, I liked it, alot. But just 4 stars. And that's my personal experience, just where I am right now.
I am about 13 weeks down the road of being Sober Curious, into what Ruby would now call Sober-Sober. Maybe, I think I needed this book between 15 and 10 weeks ago.
She is awesome, and this book is AWESOME for any THINKING of trying it and feeling insanely good!
One of my favorite quotes on page 10 was about 'Why are the only people not drinking the ones who 'can't'? Its such a part of our culture, we hardly question it.
IT'S TIME TO QUESTION IT and join the movement of SERIOUS SELF LOVE! you go girl, you are still my secret author Bff.
January 21, 2023
The author's personal journey through an alternative mode of sobriety from alcoholism.
I agreed with the premise of the book--that sobriety is something we should be curious and open to exploring, and that it's difficult to do that because we typically assume those who present themselves as sober must have a 'problem.' At the same time, I could have done without the author's weird new age tangents, constant references to 'snorting a line' as though it were a mainstream leisure activity most people would relate to, and the preachy tone. I also felt that she was rather reductive in her depiction of alcohol as the main/only major issue in people's lives, and if people become sober curious, all their problems will go away. Finally, many of the strategies she suggests (e.g. mindfulness, meditation) were not explored in a trauma-informed way and could be detrimrntal for people with trauma histories if implemented in the ways she suggests.
I agreed with the premise of the book--that sobriety is something we should be curious and open to exploring, and that it's difficult to do that because we typically assume those who present themselves as sober must have a 'problem.' At the same time, I could have done without the author's weird new age tangents, constant references to 'snorting a line' as though it were a mainstream leisure activity most people would relate to, and the preachy tone. I also felt that she was rather reductive in her depiction of alcohol as the main/only major issue in people's lives, and if people become sober curious, all their problems will go away. Finally, many of the strategies she suggests (e.g. mindfulness, meditation) were not explored in a trauma-informed way and could be detrimrntal for people with trauma histories if implemented in the ways she suggests.
December 14, 2024
Was hoping for facts about alcohol’s effects on the body and mind, or stories about people who gave up alcohol and why, or literature or journalism or memoir in any form. Instead found a way-too-long book of opinions from someone in desperate need of an editor. This was sloppy, repetitive, and annoying. I also am probably not the target audience, as I am not a regular drinker. There were good insights occasionally, but they were drowned out by the chit-chat narrative style. I felt like the book was a monologue of someone at brunch talking at you about why they don’t drink as much anymore but still do sometimes, without actually telling any good stories. Would have been a fantastic blog post, but instead was a disappointing book.
January 29, 2019
My last book for #dryjanuary and I enjoyed her approach that drinking isn’t really black or white and taking extended breaks are ok. I enjoyed her segments on physical improvements/focus/sleep and how alcohol doesn’t really fit into your wellness goals or the fact that in today’s world we really can’t be “out of it”. Some of her chapters got a bit out there for me, but I don’t judge. This is her journey and what helped her and good for Ruby for putting herself out there and sharing her truth and suggestions to help you love your best life. I wish we had a Club SODA here in STL!
January 17, 2019
A thoughtful critique of our collective obsession and individual relationships with booze through a spiritual lens. Warrington writes without judgment and speaks about alcohol not as the 'bad guy,' but as a prop we use to alter, obscure and numb our emotions. She offers solutions and resources of doing the hard work of sitting with these uncomfortable feelings instead and speaks to the joy and presence on the other side. Great read!
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