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Broken Order
ASIN moved from less recent edition here
There exists a series of connections deep within the unconscious mind and for millennia these webs have been hidden by the Custodis Arcanum, or custodians of the sacred secret. They know that mankind is not yet ready to access the network and that if it is discovered they will only use the powers for evil. Their fears become reality when their strongest member Raziel discovers the advanced mind of the psychopath Jared. With the ability to control others with a single thought Jared seeks money and power by killing his wealthy father.
In the horrific act of killing his father Jared tears a hole in the fabric of the network causing disorder within the unconscious minds of the people around him. Without the stability of the network man turns against man casting aside morality and integrity replacing them with their own selfish desires. Raziel sacrifices his powers and his memories in the attempt to repair the damage Jared has caused and is left a shell of his former self.
Now with Jared hunting him down Raziel is forced to rediscover his past in order to stay alive. With only the clothes on his back and a few friends found along the way he struggles to stay ahead of the rampaging killer in the hopes that his lost memories will reveal a way out. Time is against them as the astral plain continues to deteriorate pulling humanity deeper and deeper into chaos.
There exists a series of connections deep within the unconscious mind and for millennia these webs have been hidden by the Custodis Arcanum, or custodians of the sacred secret. They know that mankind is not yet ready to access the network and that if it is discovered they will only use the powers for evil. Their fears become reality when their strongest member Raziel discovers the advanced mind of the psychopath Jared. With the ability to control others with a single thought Jared seeks money and power by killing his wealthy father.
In the horrific act of killing his father Jared tears a hole in the fabric of the network causing disorder within the unconscious minds of the people around him. Without the stability of the network man turns against man casting aside morality and integrity replacing them with their own selfish desires. Raziel sacrifices his powers and his memories in the attempt to repair the damage Jared has caused and is left a shell of his former self.
Now with Jared hunting him down Raziel is forced to rediscover his past in order to stay alive. With only the clothes on his back and a few friends found along the way he struggles to stay ahead of the rampaging killer in the hopes that his lost memories will reveal a way out. Time is against them as the astral plain continues to deteriorate pulling humanity deeper and deeper into chaos.
178 pages, Kindle Edition
First published June 7, 2013
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Displaying 1 - 2 of 2 reviews
July 1, 2013
I'm prepared to be "downvoted into oblivion" for this rating and review, but here goes.
I found this book on imgur from a gutsy and awesome post made by Travis offering his book for free. I like free books so I thought why not. This book has been on my backburner for a while, mostly since I had a giant pile of other books I wanted to read, but yesterday I finally had some free time and I was tired of my giant pile so I opened this up.
First, let me say that this was an interesting concept. Everyone in the world is, shall I say, Metaphysically connected to everyone else by a "light thread". For example, a teacher has a connection to his students, but his thread shows up stronger with his wife. There are people in this world who can see an influence the connections. Nothing particularly new, but I don't often see something like this, so I was intrigued.
My biggest gripe with this book was the writing itself. This read like a first draft of novel, not like a finished product. I found a lot of the book difficult to read because of the editing - there were many run on paragraphs that confused me. The concept of the story was interesting, but the characters were very dry and the dialogue was somewhat amateur.
I did like the fact that the author didn't depend on dialogue, there was plenty of description going on. However, the story itself was blah and uninteresting.
I would like to see this book sent through a good editor's grinder and published again. I think if Broken Order went through a few rewrites this could be a great novel.
I found this book on imgur from a gutsy and awesome post made by Travis offering his book for free. I like free books so I thought why not. This book has been on my backburner for a while, mostly since I had a giant pile of other books I wanted to read, but yesterday I finally had some free time and I was tired of my giant pile so I opened this up.
First, let me say that this was an interesting concept. Everyone in the world is, shall I say, Metaphysically connected to everyone else by a "light thread". For example, a teacher has a connection to his students, but his thread shows up stronger with his wife. There are people in this world who can see an influence the connections. Nothing particularly new, but I don't often see something like this, so I was intrigued.
My biggest gripe with this book was the writing itself. This read like a first draft of novel, not like a finished product. I found a lot of the book difficult to read because of the editing - there were many run on paragraphs that confused me. The concept of the story was interesting, but the characters were very dry and the dialogue was somewhat amateur.
I did like the fact that the author didn't depend on dialogue, there was plenty of description going on. However, the story itself was blah and uninteresting.
I would like to see this book sent through a good editor's grinder and published again. I think if Broken Order went through a few rewrites this could be a great novel.
April 2, 2014
This was painful to read. I understand that it's a draft, but I never would have put it out for public consumption like this. It's almost difficult to get the story because the typos and grammar mistakes are so distracting.
However, I managed.
Very loose plot. Some of it is too detailed, but most of it is so loose, it reads as if an outline was written and there was little thought on connecting point A to point B.
Obviously the synopsis appealed to me, but it did not meet expectations.
However, I managed.
Very loose plot. Some of it is too detailed, but most of it is so loose, it reads as if an outline was written and there was little thought on connecting point A to point B.
Obviously the synopsis appealed to me, but it did not meet expectations.
Displaying 1 - 2 of 2 reviews