The Book of Knowing

by Gwendoline Smith

Learn to understand the way you think and you will be able to deal with many of life's difficult moments.

Written in an accessible and humorous style, this book teaches you to know what's going on in your mind and how to get your feelings under control. It'll help you adapt and feel better about your place in the world.

Psychologist Gwendoline Smith uses her broad scientific knowledge and experience to explain in clear and simple language what's happening when you are feeling overwhelmed, anxious and confused.

'This book has given our daughter life's most essential skill: the ability to notice and manage her thoughts. This skill has fundamentally changed her present and her future. We will be forever grateful.' Scarlett's mum

Genres: Nonfiction, Self Help, Psychology, Mental Health, Personal Development, Audiobook, Adult

192 pages, Mass Market Paperback

First published February 5, 2019

About the author

Gwendoline Smith B Soc Sci, M Soc Sci (hons), Dip Clin Psych is a clinical psychologist, speaker, blogger and the author of the books Depression Explained and Sharing the Load. She also goes by the name Dr Know.

Reviews

[Jessica · Rating 4 out of 5]

The Book of Knowing by Gwendoline Smith is a very informative nonfiction book about control your feelings. The book was written for teenagers, but is helpful for anyone. Most of the examples are geared towards teenagers, but adults can easily see how that would apply to their life. The Book of Knowing had a lot of useful information that I am planning to use in my life.

I listened to the audiobook. Liza Seneca did a good job narrating.

Thank you NetGalley and Andrews McMeel Publishing for this ARC audiobook.

[Bridget · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a great book for anybody curious to find out about how your brain works when it is sending you messages of stress and anxiety. What is going on in there when your thoughts are whirling, when you get stuck and can't make decisions and prevents you from living as you want. This book is a handy book for teenagers but it is interesting for anyone who is interested in the brain and how it works.

It is written in a light hearted way which makes it really accessible. Perfect for any school library. Funny cartoons, hand drawn charts and diagrams make it very user friendly too.

If someone in your life is suffering from stress or anxiety, hand them a copy of this book. But read it yourself before you do.

[Iman Danial Hakim · Rating 4 out of 5]

"𝗜𝗳 𝗜 𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗵𝗼𝘄 𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸, 𝗜 𝗴𝗲𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝗰𝗵𝗼𝗼𝘀𝗲 𝗵𝗼𝘄 𝗜 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗹"

The Book of Knowing mengajar pembaca cara² mengatasi rasa resah & risau.

Selalunya, realiti dilihat berlebihan² daripada yang sebenar: kerana kepala kita memikirkan yang bukan².

Tidak bermaksud keresahan kita itu tidak valid. Tidak.

Kerana semua perasaan, sama ada ia positif atau negatif, sama ada sewaktu kita percaya atau rendah diri: kesemuanya valid.

Tinggal, bagaimana kita menguruskan perasaan sendiri?

Dunia kita dilihat dari perspektif sendiri. Ada mental filter & bias yang (mungkin) menyempitkan sudut pandang kita.

Masalah akan selalu datang. Tetapi tak bermakna dunia ini kejam. Bukankah banyak juga hari² yang kita lalui dengan bahagia?

Dengan keluarga, kawan, dunia & seisinya.

Itulah yang cuba dipujuk oleh penulis.

Reality is as it is. Feelings are not facts. Beliefs are not facts. We can NEVER change the reality, but we can adapt and change how we react to it.

Memujuk diri sendiri adalah tugas yang paling sukar. Memaksa diri sendiri adalah pekerjaan paling susah.

Tetapi, di akhirnya, kita hanya ada untuk diri sendiri: yang sudi mempercayai diri sendiri, adalah kita sendiri.

Akan ada momen² tidak berbahagia, tapi begitulah kehidupan.

Sometimes you win, sometimes you learn.

Salam hari Jumaat semua ♥️

Berselawat, berdoalah agar hidup kita & orang di sekeliling akan baik² sahaja.

[Jamie Bee · Rating 1 out of 5]

Not for Fat Teens…

Audiobook Review
I have to say I was actually really put off by this audiobook. It is meant for teens to help them with their emotions. But I don't see it doing that. I see this book is being potentially harmful to the impressionable minds that might read it. The author comes across as so judgmental, especially toward overweight teens. She is exceedingly unprofessional. She actually uses the term “fat slob,” like that's an okay term to use. It isn't. I swear, fat-shaming is the last safe prejudice. The use of this term was bad enough, but then she has an extended example of when a teen who loves to exercise gets sick, making so they can't work out. She states that when they get on the scale and see higher numbers because they can't exercise (which won't necessarily be true because they could lose weight from not eating while not feeling well), then they will start into a shame spiral that makes them think that all they will do is gain wait forever for the rest of their lives. Really? I feel like words cannot express how terrible this would be for a fat teen or a teen with weight issues, like anorexia, bulimia, or over-exercising. The author promotes dangerous stereotypes—and hurtful ones. Just because you are fat does not make you a slob. Just because you gain weight over a short period of time doesn't mean you'll end up to be a thousand pounds because the weight gain will never stop. Words cannot express my deep disappointment in this practicing clinical psychologist and her book.

I received a free copy of this audiobook, but that did not affect my review.

[Figgy · Rating 4 out of 5]

RTC, but in the meantime... this was a conversational and easy to read exploration of how our thinking creates what we feel, with exercises and examples to help readers get a better handle on the progression from event to behaviour, and work on improving our response over time.

At times the wording could have been a little clearer, and examples might not apply to some readers, but the "pull quote" style used throughout the book makes it easier for readers to revisit the important messages when working through the exercises after reading.

[Samuel Madsen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Simple to read but covers an important topic. The book looks into everyday anxiety and how to tackle it by thinking more rationally. It’s great for people new to self-help who want to become more aware of their thoughts and feelings. The focus is mainly on managing anxiety through thought-based approaches, so readers looking for deeper or more clinical insights might find it a bit basic. Still, it’s a good and worthwhile read that makes an important subject easy to understand. Personally younger me would have found this book quite useful.

[Rianna · Rating 2 out of 5]

26/55 books read in 2020.
Provided by NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
TW for this book: fatphobic language.

Ok, so this is a very short book which feels quite disjointed and unnecessarily hurried at times.
From what I've understood, the author is known for her Tumblr blog, which she used to give advice to teens. I've looked up her blog and it hasn't been used in ages, but apart from that, it looks ok.
Unfortunately, the author hasn't changed her format style a lot from the blog to this book. And I feel that this book would have been more readable and approachable if it had.

Another major let down is the fact that the author has deemed it necessary and acceptable to use fatphobic examples to illustrate her story, both examples could have easily been removed or replaced with another, non-fatphobic, one instead.

As far as the actual advice: it was okay. From all of my own research over the years I can tell you that Gwendoline Smith isn't selling something new, but she is selling an effective technique. The way she describes the brain processes and the eventual tool kit are quite useful. However, her explanation of "thought viruses" (her phrasing) is confusing. I had to read it multiple times, and I couldn't sum them all up right now even if you begged me to.

All in all, I didn't really like this one. There are other and better sources where you, and any teen that you know, can learn about cognitive behavioural techniques and I would suggest you seek those out instead.

One I personally quite enjoyed is The Illustrated Happiness Trap: How to Stop Struggling and Start Living by Russ Harris (a recommendation from my university counsellor) and there are many more out there.

Also, it is very important that if you do find yourself in a sad period or you are struggling that you find someone to talk to. Preferably a professional, but just talking to your favourite family member can also help a bunch.

[Erena Tanabe · Rating 5 out of 5]

A psychological book friendly for teenagers.

I definitely recommend this book to teenagers and whoever is struggling with their “negative thinking” (thinking in a way that makes everything look and feel bad than it actually is)

This book is amazing. As a teenager myself, I don’t really understand how I think and how my feelings are generated (negative, positive, happy, anxious, etc). But this book explained it all - from how we think to the end result (how we feel). As a “negative thinker” myself, reading this book changed the way I think and how I feel.

I really appreciate the author and the book.

[Tracey · Rating 1 out of 5]

This woman claims to be helping young adult women to handle mental health issues? First of all, shouldn't she, instead of (or at least in addition to) running a Tumblr, be telling girls to seek professional in person counseling? And secondly: "And you worry that you are going to turn into a fat slob".

You can sod right off, Gwendoline Smith.

I received the audiobook prior to release from Netgalley for an honest review. I made it halfway through chapter two. I sincerely hope this woman doesn't screw up too many lives. From the little I can bring myself to listen to, I'm concerned.

[Elizabeth Mellen · Rating 4 out of 5]

A short and sweet introduction to CBT. As someone who is new to being in therapy, all these felt familiar but included helpful metaphors and images that were fun. Recommend for others with anxiety/depression.

[Harshita Gupta · Rating 4 out of 5]

A light and quick read on how to manage thoughts that ran out of control and offers prominent advice to keep feelings in check. I particularly loved the section throwing light on mind reading and future prediction. The writing style is warm, and the illustrations are too good. Lately, if you’re feeling anxious or stressed, then this book is worth a go.

[Megan · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book, in my personal opinion, does not apply to readers who experience severe or even moderate mental disorders. This book basically stretches out the idea that every situation is an adaptive one, which for someone without mental disorders, may be true. I myself believe adaptation in this world is vital. However, adding, say, depression or bipolar disorder on top of just saying “you will experience emotion, you will get mad, you will get sad, but get over it and adapt.” is quite unhelpful. Depressive episodes brought on by telling someone to just adapt to any situation can lead to things such as self harm, or suicidal tendencies. I will give this book credit for making it possible for readers to become aware of their emotions and give them a chance to attempt to control how they react and think about things, but overall i wouldn’t recommend this book to people who have mental disorders, especially not teens.

[Dora Okeyo · Rating 5 out of 5]

Just like the blurb says " a little book for big feelings," and just like that I found it easy to read and understand and what's more interesting is that I've struggled with emotions as a teen and reading through this made it easier to clarify a feeling from a fact, and that's powerful.
I also love the illustrations.
Thanks Netgalley for the eARC.

[Virginie Drapeau · Rating 4 out of 5]

Des beaux trucs pour les anxieux ✨

[Patience · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good review. I will read this again every so often as a reminder.

[Caroline Mickey · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really don't like self-help, but this one struck a good chord. It was just enough science and suggestion.

[Mary Coulton · Rating 4 out of 5]

So simple but so good! I wish I read this when I was 15

[Rafah · Rating 4 out of 5]

I think this book is fantastic for our young readers. I’ll be offering it to my students and using its metaphors to help. Easy to understand and some great tips and strategies!

[Ashleeeeee · Rating 2 out of 5]

Sterile, judgmental, fat phobic. This may help with basic thought redirection, but I don’t think mind-over-matter is the ultimate solution for an anxious mind. Will not recommend.

[Jess · Rating 3 out of 5]

Gives you a good overview about bad thinking habits and some tips to change the way you think. I enjoyed reading it a lot. It's easy and understandable.

[Becky Ginther · Rating 4 out of 5]

I think this could be a pretty useful book for teens who want to understand psychology, mental health, therapy, and just themselves a little better. It felt approachable and the techniques explained were easy to understand. Definitely some important lessons for teens these days, I think.

It described common "thought viruses," as she calls them, and how to combat them. I thought they were presented in a very accessible way - things like "negative mental filter" (When you are looking through a set of lenses that makes the world look dark and forgiving); "discounting the positives" (When you insist that your accomplishments or positive qualities don't count); "magnification or catastrophizing" (a scenario in which everything, no matter how tiny, feels huge, terrible, and impossible to fix); etc.

And she discusses how these thought viruses can contaminate your rational thoughts and lead you to believe that irrational thoughts are true.

"You cannot change the reality. It just is. You are the one who has to adapt. What you can change, however, is what you are thinking about the reality."

I thought overall the tone was good for teens. Sometimes it felt like maybe she was trying a little too hard to be "cool," but when she just got down and was real about a few things I think that will strike a chord (it did with me). Ex., "If you don't accept reality for what it is, you're f***ed. Because the universe doesn't care." And "Positive affirmations are putting sugar on s***." I think it's gonna ring true for a lot of young adults.

However, some of the examples were just SO over-the-top in trying to capture a teenaged example that it almost felt like it didn't take things seriously. For instance, when she discussed an anxiety issue, she gave the example of not having the right pair of jeans to wear for a party, and finding clothes that work leads to a panic attack. Does this absolutely happen to teens (and adults for that matter)? YES. But I think she could give slightly better examples to make it feel just a little more serious. There's also a lot of references and words like "OMG" which makes it feel young and maybe trying too hard.

Overall I thought it's a really nice, approachable way for teenagers (or anyone who doesn't know much about the topic honestly) to be able to start figuring out why their brains might work the way they do, and what they can do about it. I certainly thought there were some good nuggets of info.

I listened to this one on audiobook and I thought it was very good. The only downside for me is that there's some supplemental materials/charts that are provided in PDF format, which is inconvenient for me because I typically listen while I'm driving.

[Sami · Rating 3 out of 5]

The Book of Knowing is a very short and easy read. Did it give me any new knowledge? Unfortunately no, but I think that if I had had this book a few years ago, it would have saved me a lot of time. While a lot of the information in the book is self-explanatory and comes up when you first google "How to stop being anxious," it's presented in such a way that it feels less daunting. Instead of reading the words 'stop overthinking,' the author presents examples that dissect a thinking pattern gone wrong. It is in these examples that we are able to make a more meaningful connection with the tips given to us in the book.

I gave this a 3.5. As someone who suffers with anxiety, while this information was helpful, it was not new. It did not change my ways of thinking, it did open my mind to new possibilities-it simply reaffirmed what I already know. However, I feel like in the past year or so, I have been able to control my anxiety. For someone who is just starting on the path of change, this book is an excellent tool. It did not do much for me, but I'm positive that a younger audience will learn a lot from it.

[Sami · Rating 3 out of 5]

The Book of Knowing is a very short and easy read. Did it give me any new knowledge? Unfortunately no, but I think that if I had had this book a few years ago, it would have saved me a lot of time. While a lot of the information in the book is self-explanatory and comes up when you first google "How to stop being anxious," it's presented in such a way that it feels less daunting. Instead of reading the words 'stop overthinking,' the author presents examples that dissect a thinking pattern gone wrong. It is in these examples that we are able to make a more meaningful connection with the tips given to us in the book.

I gave this a 3.5. As someone who suffers with anxiety, while this information was helpful, it was not new. It did not change my ways of thinking, it did open my mind to new possibilities-it simply reaffirmed what I already know. However, I feel like in the past year or so, I have been able to control my anxiety. For someone who is just starting on the path of change, this book is an excellent tool. It did not do much for me, but I'm positive that a younger audience will learn a lot from it.

[Smitchy · Rating 4 out of 5]

The Book of Knowing is a user's manual for the brain aimed at the teen and yearly 20's crowd but as everyone has a brain this essentially for everyone. Gwendoline Smith, a clinical psychologist, started a blog on tumblr called "Doctor Know" after becoming aware of how many young people were looking for help with mental health issues but didn't know where to turn. Sometimes the issues they were struggling with were simple - others needed a deeper understanding of how the brain and decision making works which is how this book came to be written.
Smith exlains in clear simple language the links between Behaviour, Mind, Environment, Body, and Mood - how each affects the other and in turn affects decision making and your life. Using Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) techniques Smith shows readers how to look after your mind, break negative cycles, when to ask for help, and how to adjust your thinking to make the most of your life when circumstances suddenly change or life throws you a curve ball.

[Avani ✨ · Rating 3 out of 5]

The Book Of Knowing by Gwendoline Smith, a clinical psychologist from New Zealand. This book is based on the Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. It is a therapeutic handbook for, especially young adults in order to have control over their feelings and thoughts.

It focuses on concepts like - ABC model, Computer mind analogy, Cognitive Distortions, etc. I like how the author has given tips in the end for readers from non psychology background to help themselves in form of self therapy.

Since I am from Psychology background, majority of these things are already known by me. I liked how the book has pie charts and various other graphics in order to help understand better. The use of Record sheets in the book was really thoughtful. It's more like a workbook for the reader.

Overall it's a good book for teenagers to start and manage their thoughts and feelings. Wouldn't recommend for adults, as there are better and more advance books out there.
__________

Thank You to the Publisher and NetGalley for this e-copy in exchange of a honest review.

[Kayur Parekh · Rating 3 out of 5]

"The Book of Knowing" by Gwendoline Smith is a self-help guide geared towards young readers. It introduces the principles of cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) in an easy-to-understand way. This therapy aims to help individuals identify and shift negative thought patterns that might be causing emotional issues.

Smith's writing style is clear and engaging, peppered with handy illustrations and interactive elements. She manages to distill complex CBT concepts into bite-sized, digestible chunks for younger audiences.

However, the guide doesn't go into as much depth as some other CBT resources tailored for young people. For instance, it falls short in providing comprehensive strategies for identifying and combating negative thoughts.

In conclusion, "The Book of Knowing" serves as a good starting point for young individuals keen on understanding CBT. It's a useful tool for those grappling with emotional troubles, offering guidance on how to better control their thoughts and emotions.

[Annaka · Rating 3 out of 5]

I received a free audiobook in exchange for my honest review.

I almost dnf’d this after the forward. The narrator was entirely too chipper (particularly for the subject). I wasn’t the target audience (of the blog anyways, which is aimed at teens), and I found it both a bit too condescending and seeming to try too hard.

By chapter five I had started to feel its usefulness. As a therapist, the concepts still felt a bit basic but also helpful to anyone that wasn’t familiar with them and ever felt their feelings getting the best of them (all of us at some time or another).

But then again, by chapter ten, I was tired of the tone and use of slang. The information is really good and useful but the writing, narration, and presentation leaves things to be desired.

Useful information but presentation leaves something to be desired.

[Isabella Jackson · Rating 3 out of 5]

I think this book makes some really good points, and the overall message (which I interpreted as not letting your emotions cloud your perceptions) is necessary for many of us to hear. The only hitch I had with liking it more was that I felt at times it tried a little too hard to be relatable. No one I know says "OMG."

I did like the illustrations, and felt that they helped my understanding, but they weren't always placed where they were convenient to look at. That's something I often struggle with when there are illustrations in books though, so that could just be a me thing.

I would recommend giving this book a try if you think you might like some help with learning about how your perceptions can be swayed to the negative.

[Camila · Rating 4 out of 5]

Por lo general, no suelo leer libros relacionados con la psicología, no es algo que me guste o llame la atención, a decir verdad, no tengo una buena relación con los psicólogos, peo algo de este libro llamo mi atención y no me resistí a leerlo.
¿Cambió mi opinión sobre los psicólogos con este libro? No, pero de todas formas me gusto y siento que a muchas personas les puede gustar y les va a ser útil.
La idea principal del libro es entender como pensamos para poder "controlar" como nos sentimos y entender mejor las cosas que nos pasan, y lo logra, realmente logra que veas de forma diferente tus propias ideas.

[Carlos Silva · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a fairly quick read about learning how to cope with your emotions and maybe even developing skills to control them on your favor. It is aimed at the target reader who has the most trouble dealing with feelings, in my opinion: teenagers and young adults. The writing is very fluid and the chapters are pretty short – which only adds to the intention of making teens read scientific, textbook work without getting bored. The illutrations were also beautiful and added a lot of nuance to the writing.